The Necessity of Community #016

might be my name is Matt. We could say, uh, may yea, I'm all Matt. Is that Spanish? Yeah? I never took Spanish? Well, so miyama is Matt speaking of Spanish. We were at streets Alive today, which is this awesome bicycling thing through Atlanta. They shut down the street and no cars allowed, only people walking and riding bikes, and the library had a table set up with books a lot about cycling. Got these awesome books. I grab a

few books. Yeah, so if this awesome one that has no words about this girl who wants this bike and like works really hard to save up the money for the bike and just it's just like super cute. But I also got this book The Lower Acts by Dr SEUs Polly. My youngest has been really into that lately because they're learning about it at her school. But I got it in Spanish, so I tried to read it to the girls tonight because I took a lot of Spanish growing up. Oh nice, man, I didn't know that.

I'm still not very good but like seventh grade through a few classes in college too, so you think i'd be professhing. I feel like, you know, but not to hear way more Spanish coming at ease. I know, but no, I'm not. Then I've lost most of it now at this point. But it was really fun to kind of pick up that book and try to read it through. And they weren't really having any of it. Dad, We don't understand. They're just like staring at you with awkward face.

Can we move on to pee the cat or something else? So we did, But that was really that was really fun. Streets Alive was a blast today. Yeah we did that today. So that's like, yeah, like you said, a huge It's not just a bicycling festival, but it's just sort of a way toes show like bicycling, walking, basically any transportation other than cars is allowed. And obviously we love biking. That was our first episode. That's a huge part of our life and uh in a big part of our community,

and we're gonna that's what we're gonna be talking about today. Actually. Yeah. So it was fun, like, you know, riding our bikes around. We brought our girls, put them on the back and we'll post pictures of what that looks like. Our bikes are are really fun and um got those cargo bikes. Yeah, so there are a lot of fun and and we you know, ran into just a bunch of people, some of some who I see all the time and some who I see almost never. And so I saw some

clients of mine. Just fun biking around, and especially it was really neat. I don't know if you felt this when I turned onto the street initially on my bike. That's such a busy intersection usually oh yeah, and I like for the first minute and a half, it just

was almost like surreal biking on that road. Were like no cars, we're here, yeah, no cars And I was like, wait, the car's gonna come out of somewhere right, uh, And it was really really fun though, And so I don't know if your community where you live has something like that, but Atlanta has the Atlanta Bike Coalition, and they're awesome and they support great things like this, and so it's really really fun to go out there. Kind of vendors set up giving away free things and yeah, I get

other free bees. Yeah, and then you know, pick up some library books while I'm at it. So that was a good time. Yeah, Cliff bar was out there. Man, They're like the best. They're always giving out just all their different flavors and and trying stuff out. We kind of camped out there for a second, got the girls all the snacks that chocolate chocolate, peanut butter banana. I'm always done with free bees. I'm always done with biking, especially when there's no cars in the way. So beautiful. Yeah,

I can't wait for the next Streets Alive. That was a blast. Yeah. Next one will probably be a lot hotter, though it's gonna be a little brutal. Yeah, today it was a little cool, surprisingly cool, but yeah, next one will be hot for sure. They don't call it hot LANDA for nothing. Yeah, they don't call it hot LANDAU. By the way, if you're wondering anybody out there that doesn't live in Atlanta. It is not called Hotlanta. Yeah, don't come don't come down here saying things like that.

Just don't do it, all right, Matt. So today on the show, we're going to talk about how community can save you money, our community can help you in a pinch, and how it also contributes to a healthy and balanced life. Yeah, let's get into that beer first. Today's beer is called Hello Beautiful, and that is by Monday Night Brewing, and this beer is actually donated to the show. So we want to thank the guys over there that Monday Night for sending us this gorgeous beer. Joel's pouring it now

and it's like ruby red. It's like a reddish purple. And it's a barrel fermented wild ale with blueberries, which is man one of my favorite styles, like get that wild ale, which basically means like that's where it has the natural yeasts and bacteria. But then I found that blueberry. The blueberry wilds are some of my favorite wild ales. So I'm super stoked about given this one to try. Yeah, man, this first time for both of us, which is fun. Yeah,

having a new beer that neither of us has had before. Yeah, extra fun. It smells awesome. That smells wonderful, nice and acidic. Yeah, I'm salivating. That's always a good sign. It's not as sour as you think it's gonna be when you stick your nose in there. I think, like the white wine barrels, maybe meld this one out a good bit. So it's not terribly acidic. And uh, the blueberries really come through nicely. Yeah, nice fruit to me. It almost drinks like a lambic.

It's kind of got that Belgian kind of funkiness going on with it. And it's not overly sweet as well. It's kind of dry. I think, like you said, like the white wine barrels kind of mellow mellowed out a little bit. Yeah. I think if you like fruity beers but you don't love sours, this is probably a good one for you to check out because it doesn't have that that sour bite, like like that kick. Yeah exactly. And and when I stop my nose in it, that's what I was expecting and here and it really didn't

have that. And so I think if you if you don't love sowers, but you like you know, fruit fruit forward beers, then this is probably gonna be a really good beer for you to try. Yeah, this is excellent, all right, Matt, onto the topic of the day, the necessity of community and the first thing we want to talk about. I mean, I think community gets to so many things before we get into kind of what we think about community and the importance of it and kind of how it can be helpful. What's your take on

what community actually means? Yeah, man, I guess before we spend an entire podcast talking about what community does that help you, we need need to talk about like what it is. We need to define it. So the way we're gonna be talking about community today is essentially the shortest definition. I think are your friends, Right, So you're talking about the people in your life who you call your friends and your neighbors, those that are around you

that you share similar values with. As we talk through some of these different ways that community has an impact on our lives, it'll kind of quickly become clear that this is at least the definition that we're kind of going to be going with. As far as what a community is, yeah, I think usually a community means that you have some sort of characteristic or something some bond in common. Um. And so you can have a religious community, you can have like a school community, you can have

a neighborhood community. There are all these possibilities, and you likely as a listener. And and Matt and I were in a few different communities, and Matt were in some of the same ones, and we're also in different communities from each other too. Yeah, And so when I looked up the episodes that had the term community in them um on my podcast app, I was just kind of checking to see, you know, what another people said when it came to community, what what sorts of episodes were

being put out on this topic. And essentially all the podcast episodes I saw about community were religious based. They were sermons or something from you know, churches all over the country talking about this term. Uh. And I think that's great. I think a religious community is a great community for you to have, you know, whether you are currently in one or want to be in one. That's just for a lot of folks, that's a strong sort of tie that that kind of anchors people to their

faith and the different things that they value. And based on our definition, that would make sense that that would be a viable in uh, an important community because you have something deep in common, right, something that you hold hold deer and it's in common, and so that would be hopefully a community of people that are tightly knit together based around that fact. But so we want to

talk about community from a different angle. And although I do think religious community is really important and for us in particular, actually it is that plays a big role in our life for sure. Yeah, it's enormously important. I would say it's, you know, one of my most important

communities that I am in. But Matt, the importance that you and I place on community, whether it is our religious community or a neighborhood community, or so the financial community, the personal finance community that we're a part of, overall, the beer community, the beer community. Uh, we put a lot of importance on that. And we've put a lot of thought into this episode about how we can convey the way that we think about community to you listeners

out there. Yeah. I mean, essentially, that's why we're dedicating an entire episode to community. Right, It's not like this sort of concrete thing where we're talking about credit school or or travel tips, which are very easy to wrap your head around but we think that this will be a great episode for us to talk about the importance of community and the role plays in our lives. Hopefully we don't get bogged down on, you know, the definition

of a of a community. And I think at any point more we're talking through this, we can substitute the word community for friends essentially, right, whether it's your beer friends, or your neighborhood friends, or your work friends. Essentially anybody in your life that you can call on or that can call on you. I mean, essentially, that's what a

community is, our friends, and that's what we're gonna talk about. Yeah, and since we're a beer and money podcast, like, we have to include the important fact that having a good, solid community can actually help save you money. So that's the first point you want to talk about, Yeah, man,

nice segue. So one of the first things we want to talk about is sharing things, not in like a hippie commune sort of way where we're all like have the same stuff, but sort of if you know, we're like we're kind of going down that path, and we're specifically talking about sort of sharing rarely used items instead of buying them. Everybody in our neighborhood doesn't need a tiller, Like that's not something that everybody uses all the time

or that everybody even needs. But if you've got one and in your neighbors canna use it or vice versa, how much better is that than to go to the store and drop a ton of money on something that you're hardly ever gonna use. That's just gonna kind of sit there in your basement until the next time you might need to use it. Yeah, I've lent out my paint sprayer more than I've actually used it. I think

I don't know you have paint sprayer, daughter. Nice. There's so much I don't know about you, Joel Espaniel paint sprayer. I know, Matt, we've been convinced by advertising and kind of by the way our modern world works that we need every item that is available, we need one of our own. And I think there's so many ways in which we don't need every item for ourselves in our shed, taking a room in our house, and every item that you have, I feel like takes up a little bit

of mental space for you. And it goes back to our spring cleaning episode, and it's just like it just weighs on you. Yeah, and so having fewer items, but then being able to share those items, and particularly the big things. Right, let's say it's just a paint sprayer or a lawnmower which you need once every two weeks, or I think back to when we helped each other put up Christmas lights. Four hands are better than two. Write.

Two people working together and to make something happen makes the work easier, and it makes it more fun, and it makes everything go along more quickly. And so having community, you know, you didn't need to hire someone to study the ladder, you didn't need to, you know, hire someone to help me string the lights. But we tackled it together on on each of our homes and it was much quicker and easier, and ultimately it saves money. So, and there might be some tools that you need to own.

Maybe you use your lawnmower once a week. For me, I have my lawn that I need to mow and then runtal home laws that I need to mow, and so I get a lot of use out of my lawn more. But yeah, like a tool that you might only need to use once a year, it's not something you need to have around all the time immediately, So that you can go ahead and use it. It's something that you you can kind of plan on or look think about, look towards, and with a little bit of thought, it's

easy to just borrow. One another example I was gonna give to was we had a birthday party for one of my daughters and there's a lot of stuff we didn't have for it. And we could have gone that route right where you buy just get everything that you possibly need, just order it on Amazon because it's so easy, but instead we kind of asked around to some of our neighbors. Literally two blocks this way and three blocks

that way. We've got a lot of our stuff from, you know, from our friends and neighbors, including like a fire pit and a huge table that that we didn't have, a big old folding table. And man, that was like a perfect example of sort of like our community, our friends kind of coming together and instead of us being like, oh, we just have to do this, this is something that we have to buy, and this is something we need. We don't need it all the time, we just needed

for the party. And so you just borrow it real quick, take care of it, use it, return it in better condition that it showed up. You know, and you're good to go. Yeah, And and mathic cool thing is like when we had kids, we had people giving us clothes from their kids before and and essentially my daughters came into this world fully clothed for the next like three years because of all the generosity from friends in our community.

And then we've been able to kind of pass along and do the same thing and give to other friends and paying it forward. Yeah. Yeah, And so it's really fun to be able to buy less and to be more thoughtful about our purchases when it comes to clothing because you know, we've got this free system of distribution amongst our community. Yeah. Man, that's another great way to

save money. There's just certain things that you only need in a small season of life, like kids clothes, or I was thinking about Kate maternity closed, like I don't know how many different There's this one dress actually that I'm thinking of that both of our wives and another friend of ours wife wore, and man, I also sick of seeing that dang dress because they all loved it,

and so they all kept wearing it. Obviously not at the same time, but they all got kind of pregnant after each other and cascading pregnancy seriously, but that one dress, man, it made their ounds. It was a hot item, and you know, I was joking about it, but in the end, I was totally happy that Kate wasn't dropping all this money on way overpriced maternity clothes to where just for a couple of months. Yeah, and really, you know, you

need those clothes for you know, four or five months essentially. Yeah, And so it feels like a big waste if you actually have to go stock your wardrobe with new clothes that small period of time. And if you can borrow, you know, a couple of pairs of jeans and if you dresses, you can get through that time. And community is so good about that because you can even go buy used which is great. You're still buying though, but you're still buying and used asn't free, so unless it's

from your community. Yeah, yeah, I love I love that sort of aspect of being pregnant and sort of going through that process together and even with the kids not too. Man, I can't even think of all the different kids clothes and the different toys that we sort of passed on and even diapers to are you know, cloth diapers not like obviously disposals. Here's a used poopy diaper for you, because we tried out the whole cloth diaper thing and

that can be expensive. But some friends of ours actually they hooked us up with a huge bag of cloth diapers for us to try out, and there's a bunch of different styles and we got to see what worked for us, and man, you know what, we were so glad because not all of them worked for us, and we were able to find the one that worked best for us, and that was awesome. And to think of how much money we would have spent, even buying from

a consignment store would have cost us a ton. Yeah, you would have dropped a big chunk of change on that. And so what a great thing to be able to try something else before you buy. And you know it's totally cool is that we just passed that huge bag onto some other friends of ours because they cloth diaper and man, I was so stoked to be able to

pass this awesome resource of cloth diapers along. Hopefully all of this doesn't completely revolve around children, but because kids grow so quickly and that's just something that's so temporary, I think there's a huge opportunity there for saving money. Yeah. Well, and so I'll give an example here, the one that doesn't revolve around kids. My co worker Kim and I have carpooled to work together at times, and it's because we're not just co workers, we're friends and we're part

of the same community. We live close to each other in a neighborhood community or part of the same work community. Uh. And that car pooling has been really great at times. You know, most of the time, I'm biking now, so we don't car pool nearly as much together, but it's really fun when we do, and it saves on gas and it makes the ride just a little bit more

fun through awful traffic. And you guys just I mean, I assume you guys alternate, right, Like, you don't make her do all the driving, No, I make her do all ri No. Yeah, we all, yeah, we alternate. So I'll drive on, she'll drive another driving home in in crazy downtown traffic is pretty rough, and so it gives us, you know, we listen to a podcast together, we talk about it. Whatever. It gives us a chance to not be white knuckle gripped to the steering wheel on the

ride home. And so yeah, it's a lot of fun. And another example as date night, so you and I with our wives, we swap date nights. So one week you'll put your girls down and I'll come over and you know, essentially babysit, which means either like reading or getting some work done something like that while your girls are asleep while you guys are out on a date. And then the next week you come over to our house while we do exact same thing. The girls are down,

you're able to come over. Honestly, that's one of the best things that we've got and and got going, and it's a great system. Most people pay for a babysitter or they don't, right, and so because don't go out, yeah, and because that they their their relationship kind of suffers and they're like, oh, babysitters are so expensive, and they just kind of don't want to go through the hassle of setting it up. But the way we have is

set up is that it's a recurring weekly thing. So we you know, we flipped back and forth every week and it a keeps our relationship with our wives in great shape. You know that we have that sort of automatic time built into res schedules. But b Man, we save tons of money and it's not like we're doing any work with the children. We're kind of getting stuff done, but we get to do our own thing and just

kind of hang out at the other person's house. Man, that's like one of our ye like you said, a great system that we've got going, and we totally recommend other folks to do that as well. Yeah, in similar fashion, Matt, we switch off on taking our girls to school, and so I take the girls in the morning. You pick up the girls in the afternoon. And that's been awesome because if we had to do both every day, that's

so much more draining. Uh. And the fact that we can essentially split those tasks up saves us a lot of time allows us to you know, I think the girls have fun. It's enjoyable for me to take them in the morning. I know they have a bunch of fun with you in the afternoon, and so there's something really cool about that and just better. It's better that way. It saves us time and money and effort. And that's another one of the best things that has come from

our friendship and from the community. Because let's say you're not available or something like that, We have other friends too that are part of our community that could pick up Selma and who also go to the same school. Yeah, yeah, I was gonna say that, actually, because you don't deal

with this as much, because you do mornings. I do the afternoon since I have a little more flexible schedule, and you have to be there by a certain time to pick up the kids, like almost to the minute, and if you're not, they're supposed to start getting charged, Like you're supposed to start getting charged for every minute that you're past the pickup window time. Even though you and I account on each other for the general carpool, there's still other friends that we have at the school.

And often times me and if you the other moms who do the pick up in the afternoons, we text each other if someone's running late and we'll sign the other kids out. That way they don't get docked the feet.

Yeah yeah. And so sometimes someone might be running late and it's just like, hey, I'll be there in a few minutes, and you just kind of hang out there with the kids for a little bit and it saves them money and you know, and they'll gladly return the favor when I'm late which is oftentimes the case, hopefully not too often, but it does happen. So that's like another tangible way that that saves money. Yeah, so those

are the financial benefits of community. I think there are lots. Yeah, there's a lot of other examples, certainly that we haven't discussed, but those are very clear in our lives at least, and those are very tangible ways to right like, and that's what's so easy about that is is it's easy to say that, like, oh, this costs this much money if I can borrow this or allow a friend to borrow this, and we kind of get a system going.

We get to say that much money. There's other ways though, that community helps that are less tangible, that are harder to quantify and real quick before we get into that, Matt, After talking about you know, the way you can save you money, it makes me, well, what if act would you give to someone who feels like they're lacking in community now and trying to build a community they feel like, you know what, that sounds awesome? I want some of that.

I want to be able to share the burden and share costs and have a close relationship with people like that in my life. That I can depend on and that can depend on me. But how do you develop that? Yeah? Man, that's an awesome question. I just take I just take take, take take. Oh, I know, here's some coupons. Taker, Literally, you just threw some coupons onto the table. What did you pull this out of like your pocket? Yep? No, I mean you have to be a valuable part of

that community. If you want to be a part of it, you need to contribute, right And so if first of all, if it doesn't exist yet, you're going to be the one that creates it. And if you want it to exist, it's up to you. Yeah, And that doesn't mean that you have to have the paint sprayer in your closet to give. You can build community through time, through intentionality, through relationship and so you know, so many the best members of my community I haven't even borrowed anything from.

They haven't saved me any money, they haven't lent me something in a pinch or giving me clothes for my kids. But they've been there with time, with an ear, with some concern for what's going on in my life, whatever it may be. I think valuable members of the community are people that have time for one another. And so if you truly desire to have community like this, to have well, we think is this major contributing factor to

living a rich life. You first have to make sure that you're the change in the world that you want to see. You know, you have to be that member of the community that you want to have you're talking about Michael Jackson. If you build it, they will come. I don't know, man in the mirror. Fair though it sounds cheesy to say, but literally that's I mean. You need to be able to have time for each other.

You need to contribute. And so I was thinking more of like being able to be there for folks from a lending standpoint, but like you know, I think what you said is even more important, like being able to be there from a time standpoint and be there for each other. And you have to know it takes time to build, like it took us a while to develop the date night swap, right, because when you met me day one, you didn't know. I totally want to let that dude watch my kids. I don't trust him, right,

So it takes time to get to know someone. Community is very time oriented. It's hard to build Apart from that and so if you're spending all your time working, you're probably gonna miss out on some of these free things, these free benefits, and these really important benefits the community has to offer you. And I think wealth takes on many forms, and most of us think about it as purely financial, but a wealth of community is so much more than just a financial benefit it can bring you.

And that's why we want to kind of get into those other aspects. Now, yeah, Juel, that's but yeah, that's awesome, man Like. So, like the first thing, so the first main point we talked about was how it saves you money, like again, which was a very tangible and kind of measurable thing. These other two things that we're gonna be

talking about, it's not as tangible. It's it's kind of harder to wrap your head around, but that doesn't make it any less important, and in fact, it probably makes it more important because those things are way more important than just saving a buck. Yeah, So the second sort of main point that we're going to discuss is how I mean community can kind of help you out in the pinch. And so there's just things that community can

provide to you that you can't necessarily buy with money. Yeah, And so for instance, I'll be completely honest about something that's been happening in our family's life lately. And we've had some health issues going on with my wife and we kind of weren't sure what was happening. It's been kind of scary. I mean, you're still not totally sure, but yeah, so we're still not totally sure, but we we think we've kind of gotten a closer idea of

what it is and about to get real guys. And uh, it's actually been really hard physically for her during this time, and so there were days that were really hard and still are hard. And there were specific times where you know, we really needed someone to take our kids because we had to go to a doctor's appointment, and the community that we had built up over over these past years in this neighborhood, in this place rose up to help us in all these ways that some of which we

asked for and some of which we didn't. You know, sometimes it was specifically watching our kids because we asked. Sometimes it was what can I do for you because I know you need help even though you're not going to ask for it, And sometimes it was that time, and other times it was flowers left on the porch or someone coming over to talk and to care, and all of those things meant like so much more than

just being able to like save a buck. Yeah, like that bart of community means so much more than the fact that I can borrow a lot more from a friend, right, And that's awesome. I like, I love that. That's the thing. But those intangible aspects of community, that closeness that you can have with people over time, and I think community usually does take, like I said, a lot of time

to develop. We have been in this place building relationships with the people that we care about for you know, almost a decade, and so we knew how valuable it was, I think in our minds, but we felt it tangibly in this time where we really needed something and we needed the people around us to to help us, and they did. They were there for us, and it was beautiful. Yeah, that is beautiful, man, that's awesome. Some of the unintangibles too, are just being able to take the stress out of

daily living. So like we were talking about like that pre k where I pick up their girls in the afternoon, like just knowing that someone's kind of there and then they had your back, like there's someone we can kind of count on. Even though that's on a scale of magnitude of seriousness compared to you know, with the example that you gave, but it's still one of those little things that you kind of worry about and and it does add stress to your daily life thinking what if

I don't get there in time? And then obviously it's gonna cost money as well. But it's kind of an issue with the teachers as well because you're not there when you're supposed to, and just knowing that someone's there and they've got your back, it's kind of priceless. You can't sort of buy that piece. You can't buy that peace of mind. Yeah, And so Matt, sometimes that community the right it means like where you're at, like other

parents at school, and sometimes it's geographic specific. Sometimes it needs to be a neighbor and knowing your neighbors is really important. And so for instance, like if a package gets left under doorstep and it's really important and you need to make sure that it doesn't get get snagged by the kid walk down the street or whatever. Yeah, yeah, so it sees the Amazon package sitting there, Yeah, which

has happened so much in our neighborhood. Yeah, have I told you the story about the about the our neighbors across the street. So yeah, it was actually not too long after we moved into our house. Kate had ordered something as like a gift for a friend and it had gotten delivered and evidently, right after like the ups guy drove off or whatever, some dude that was just walking down the streets, some kid walked up onto the

porch and snagged it. Well, here's the thing. Our neighbor across the street was hanging out there, kind of hanging out on their porch, and he saw it go down, and so the dude took off after him, like literally chased him down. And the guy was really fast, so he ran back and got in his car and just and tore after him. Unfortunately, they never got the thing back, but still, like that's something that a is totally badass and awesome and now they're like our favorite neighbors ever.

But how cool is that? Right? You can pay for a security system and cameras and sort of all the other sort of stuff that goes into trying to make your house secure, and you can even pay for a lot security service that drives around and looks at your

house or something. You can't pay a neighbor to be there for you and like looking out for you and they've got your back and to know that we've got that, like I've got this bond now with that neighbor and like, man, I've got their back now too, Like it's just natural and now I want to be there for them. But yeah, I feel like that's a perfect example of something that kind of happens a lot of times that people are dealing with these days, especially with all the online ordering

that we're doing and the way we purchase things. And then awesome, it's crazy, man, Yeah, that's crazy. I love that your neighbor did that. Literally he took off running after him and I was like, wait, dude, you did what, Like that's awesome. I don't sure if I would have done that initially, but I am now because you did it, So I'm like empowered because of him. Sure. Yeah, there's something really cool about that that that sense of community can foster that you know what, You're not gonna do

that to my neighbor for my friend. You know that's not gonna happen mask my buddy. Yeah, and along the lines of sort of like neighbors sort of looking out for each other too. Is that's another thing you can do with like your community, and and that's kind of neighborhood specific. Is that when you get to other and sort of put your mind behind something as like a group of people specifically geographic, you can do so much. And recently our neighborhoods started putting on like this festival

and it's freaking awesome. This past year was the second year now that they've done it, and it's totally cool. It's a ton of fun, and it's like a legitimate, huge event and they're you know, a lot of people come in from all over the city to check it out. And that's not something you can just pay for. Like you can't just pay for a neighborhood festival. You can't just say, oh, I want us to have like this cool festival, let's just pay for it. Bringing all the

finest artism you know. Yeah, Like you can't just literally neighborhood people that make stuff that is awesome. It's not the Renaissance and you're not a king, Like you can't just will this to happen like it. It involves work, in time and a lot of community and neighbor involvement, and that's just something that's totally cool that we're really seeing the results of and being able to support that. It's hard to explain, but like, I just want to support that because that's just part of who I am

and I'm part of this community. Yeah. Well, you know what makes me think about kind of the central part of where we live. There's this church and this parking lot and it's also a school and so our girls, Matt have gone to school at this little neighborhood school right there and like a parents morning out thing. Yeah, and that specific spot is like the dead center of

our neighborhood. And this church that have been there for a long time was kind of struggling, just not many people going there and it was pretty much set to disband, and so we had a neighborhood meeting about you know, what are we gonna do with this space? And it was so interesting. All of our neighbors turned up. I was there, you were there. It was so like uplifting to hear what all of our neighbors thought about this neighborhood.

And it's something that I had felt, but to hear everyone say it out loud too, was really neat just the way our neighbors feel about each other and the way that they feel about this place. And essentially what a lot of people said was that where we live feels a little bit like Mayberry. It has this small town feel in this big city where everyone does look out for one another, where everyone cares about what happens in their neighbors lives and they care about what happens neighborhood.

And I think that there's something kind of rare in in our culture about that right now, that it's kind of every man for himself, and this idea of neighbors and neighborhood and belonging to each other in this way is really cool. And it's also just not something that exists in very many places, and it's something to be strived for certainly, and I'm just thankful that we have it here. Yeah, man, it's just rare. Like you said,

it's not something that we always see. And initially when we first went to the neighborhood, we didn't know its ton about living in a neighborhood, living in an in town group, or geographic location. But over time, like we've learned, Yeah, I feel like literally I've been taught community by the people around me, by like the people that have gone

before and have been here for decades even. Yeah, and so they kind of taught me how to care and how to be a part of this place because the sense of community was so deep when we came here. We didn't know what we were getting into to a certain extent, and I had other communities. But to realize, you know, this has become such an essential part of

who I am and what matters to me. To get to be a part of that, and to see the way it's mattered to people that have lived here longer than I have, then the way it transfers down to me, Okay, cool, Now I need to take ownership of this. I need to be a part of this in a positive way because I don't want to let my community down, Like I want to be a part of this for good. Yeah. What's cool about that is it's a community that we have been trained up in because it already existed, like

it's something that we've sort of joined. And that's not always the case though, for for a lot of people, Like on the last point you talked about like ways to sort of foster that and I feel like that's applicable to this as well. It's something to consider that. You know, we're lucky enough that we live in a great community, but that's something that most people can have with time and energy and effort. If that's not something you see, that's something that you can do and sort

of be the leader on. Yeah. I mean, I think if you sit down and brainstorm, what what are we missing? How come we're not connected as a neighborhood, as neighbors. Why is it that we don't get together for social gatherings. Why is it that you know, something that we really need doesn't exist. If you can put pin into paper,

you can think it through. You can start the ball rolling, start organizing a community where you live, be about the process of actually creating relationships with the people around you. I think it's really easy to like grab the mail out of the mailbox or pick up the paper. I don't think anyone gets papers anymore. Whatever it is, and

you see your neighbor in your wave. But what we're missing is connectivity, relationship, and you can really be about starting that on your block, you know, on your street where you live. And uh so, if it doesn't exist in the way that you wanted to. You're really the

best person to start that. And the reason that we are even striving towards this is that like somehow, like deep down, we know that that's valuable, but there's something else, way bigger to be said, to know that your community sort of has your back and the sort of richness that that provides, right, and even sort of moving deeper than that, is that we know, like I said, sort of deep down, like we know that kind of living

in that community leads to like a healthier life. Yeah, I mean, I think of it as a core human need and I think we've placed so much importance on a career or status that we've neglected the importance of community. And actually, when you give of yourself in a relational way,

you get back more than you've you been given. Maybe not in a sort of financial way, but in again, this is like the super intangible thing, and like you can't really quantify it, right because like a pure economist would say, well, no, when you give of yourself, that takes time, and time is money. So there's an opportunity cost there, right by being neighborly and being involved in your community, and going to a civic association meeting or

something like that. That's money that you could be working and further in your career. So it literally costs you money. And so from a financial standpoint, you're losing out. Yeah, it doesn't affect the bottom line in a positive way exactly. But there's something way bigger to be said, and there's a there's just like this robustness and this richness that comes from living in a community where neighbors and where friends value each other and what each other is able

to provide. Uh, in a way that it's hard to quantify, but deep down, I think we all know that that's necessary and that that's going to lead to just a richer, fuller life. Yeah. And when you know, my friends or neighbors or something like that are having a cocktail party at five pm on a work day, you know what I want to do leave work early and goes that and so there's something about that's what I want to do. Yeah, there's something about that though that it's kind of anti

the fifty hour work week. It's kind of anti the you know, build up your career, because that's the most important thing. And I want to say too that I think one of the beautiful things in community too is that it can help you embrace like a tapestry of people, not just people that are your age with the same mindset and the same goals, but people of different races and different histories and different ages. And I think that's something really cool about community too, and especially about a

physical location community. Yeah, that's a huge thing with a specific geography or or you know, like a neighborhood, which is what we're kind of discussing, because you don't choose usually who your neighbors are, you know, and so they just exist when you move into your house, and you have to find a way to be neighborly, and there's

something really cool about that. Sometimes they have a lot to offer you in different ways, and sometimes they have nothing to offer you, but whatever it may be, they are part of your community, and there's something really cool about knowing them and caring for them in that way. And I'll specifically say, like, we have an elderly neighbor behind us, and he has meant so much to me, just the conversations over the fence with this awesome guy who's experienced a lot of life. He hasn't ever given

me anything monetarily. He's never you know, lent me his lawn mower, but just our conversations and the way he's cared for my children, talk to them and help them and wanted to know more about their lives, and just that relationship I've built with him. He's sort of like a neighborly grandfather figure for you guys, no doubt, no doubt he's He's wonderful and I wouldn't trade you know,

somebody that can offer me a lot more. And when it comes to you know, trade, trading or bartering or whatever it is, you know time and you know, help lifting heavy things whatever. Maybe like I wouldn't trade that for you know, the relationship that I have with him and what he adds to our community. Certainly, what if he was a grandpa that brewed beer, well then I'd like him even I completely agree man, having that diverse, Like you said, tapestry is a good way of saying

it of of neighbors. And I think that's one of the things we love too about our community and neighbors is the fact this is specific to the to our girls, to our kids, but also to us. It's just what we're able to learn from other people skills that are neighbors and friends have that they're able to sort of share with us and specifically to sort of teach our kids.

Like I love that our girls are able to learn things that we know nothing about that Kate and I my wife and I know nothing about, but they're able to learn about from from other parents and just from other neighbors. Not not necessarily parents, but so specifically. I'm thinking of when Heavy, our daughter started taking ballet. Kate and I know nothing about dance. It's just not something that we do. But Emily, your wife is totally into dancing.

That's just like one of her things. She grew up doing ballet, so she she goes a little bit about it exactly. And so for Evy to be able to talk to her about that specifically and to kind of get her fired up and to kind of, you know, ask her to do some certain news or something like that. When when you guys would come over and hang out

that sort of thing, How awesome was that? Like, Man, that just makes my heart glad to see that, you know, and just to know that we're able to kind of contribute to our lives and these seemingly super casual ways, but there's just something about it that's beautiful and that that goes really deep and and just enriches everyone's life to be able to to to have that. Yeah, and our friend David, who knows a lot about soccer, and

we're he bought a couple of goals. Yeah, We've been talking with some of our friends and neighbors about which different soccer programs are part of, you know, like the different clubs that you join and pay and stuff like that. But what we realize is our kids are kind of too young to be paying all this money to join this league that has set times and just know it's a bit structured hundred fifty bucks to you know, hang out on a Saturday and watch your kid put their

thumb in their mouth while they're playing soccer. While I say that, when when David, like he has a wealth of knowledge about soccer, he loves soccer, and he's told like, you know what, like I can do that, and so that's something that a skill that he has a passion that he has. And we're gonna just kind of get all the kids together and let them sort of kick the ball around on their own, like that, yeah, and

maybe teach them a few things. But certainly that's really cool because I love that idea because standing around on a Saturday with you know, a bunch of other parents who have their Starbucks coffee in their hands or whatever while they're watching their kids, you know, staying around and a coach they've pulled up in their H two hummer or whatever. I don't even know if they make those anymore,

but yeah, that sounds terrible. But hanging out with buddies in part of our community, friends and our kids getting together to play a game that we enjoy and essentially teaching our kids together at the same time, Like, that sounds really fun. That sounds like something completely different than an organized league, and that sounds like the kind of thing community is perfect to accomplish, all right, man, So what about when it comes to digital communities. There are

lots of them. There are lots of places where you can find people of like mind online, different forums and even just Facebook and just all the different groups out there. Yeah, So what's your take on digital communities and how they fit into kind of the way that we view community as a whole. Yeah, man, that's just something I'm like super concerned about that these digital communities are replacing sort of the real life communities that we have in person.

And I don't want to knock online forums and just different groups that were part of because like, I mean, I'm part of tons of different groups online, specifically I like on Facebook, and there's amazing information that comes from those and even support, you know, Like there's a lot of different groups that that help each other out and provide encouragement with whatever it is that people are going through.

Like let's say, you know, we started a podcast and we're a part of a podcast group on Facebook, and if I have a technical question or we have questions about you know, all right, we're fifteen episodes in. What what do we do next? You know, whatever it is. Let's say I had a question about gear or the direction that we should take our show. There's this awesome community that I know I'll get a response from because we have this thing in common. Even that just existing

is really cool. I I love that it's there in case I need it. Yeah, man, it's incredibly helpful, right, Like, there's a lot of information there and you're in it with people. There's a lot of people that are going through something very similar a lot of times that you are, and so it's very helpful you have like peers. Everybody's kind of like lifting each other up. Incredibly valuable. I

do not want to discount that at all. What I'm afraid of happening, though, is when that becomes sort of like our primary sort of interaction and we lose this realness. We lose this real actually hanging out together, where you're where you're with other people, you're experiencing the nuances that come with awkward social situations sometimes, or understanding jokes or you know, like, there's just so much that's lost when

it comes to digital communication. And even though there's all this technology to sort of break down those barriers of communication that allow us to maybe communicate more realistically when we're in these digital communities, it's still not the same. Uh. There's something to be said with being able to hang out with people, real life people together, hopefully sharing a beer.

There's something that that comes with that that again is it's just hard to describe, you can't quantify it, but it just adds a robustness, it adds a richness, it adds a fullness to life that you can't replicate online, and I think there's something to be said to that any of these sort of online communities and forums, like their main purpose is to imitate real life, and so like at the core of the technology that like, the technology knows that what they're trying to do is basically

imitate what we're doing right now, which is like hanging out and talking, right, And so when the imitation kind of becomes the focus versus than the real thing, I think that's when it starts getting kind of dangerous. And it's not dangerous, I guess, but it's just like a slippery slope and I feel like we can miss out on on something better. Yeah. No, I think that's a great point. I think specifically our Facebook group, it's been

really fun. Yeah, it's awesome. It's been great getting to know some of the people in there and you know, hearing questions or what they want to hear in an episode, whatever it is, what beer they're drinking, yeah, or seeing people help each other out, like answered other questions to each other and and providing helpful tips and feedback. I love that. Man, that's just amazing to see that. And hopefully there's just more and more of that to come. I love that that is a medium that exists. But

I think that's a great secondary community. I think you need your primary communities should be real and tangible and physical. And if your primary community is an online community, that's probably just not healthy. And so look at your physical location where you live, you know, your neighbor's neighborhood. That's a great place to find community. Look at your religious congregation if you're a member somewhere, that's a great place

for a community. Look at if you have kids. You know, who are the other adults around you that have children similar age. That's a great place for a community. And I would say, I think to an exception, maybe it's to that is if those online communities, like these different groups, if they reinforce like your real life communities, right, and so like I'm thinking about our neighborhood, like we have

obviously like our specific actual neighborhood. We hang out together and have like the festival and hang out you know, up on the corner while kids ride bikes in the parking lot, that sort of thing. But the online version of that supports that. And so in the same thing, if the online version of that kind of becomes the focus, well it starts to suck, because that's when people troll and are mean to each other and are lane. That's

why comment sections on the internet although work exactly. But then if you're able to sort of compliment your real life interactions with the online version, well then it's just this awesome platform for sharing information, for coordination, for sharing events.

It's awesome for like details and specific advice that you might not be able to get from a friend because you have this aggregate knowledge online that you don't necessarily have in a smaller personal community, which is what's so cool about it, right, Hive Mine, Yeah, yeah, I love that. But ultimately, you want your you know, most of your interactions to be in a real and tangible community that exists where you are. Yeah, man, I think that's true.

Now let's just talk about if you're in a cult, that's a bad community, stay away, get out right now. I also think, Matt, that your family can be a great place of community too. And you know, I've got an awesome family that I love, and we get to get together at least once a month and we hang out and uh and I see you know, other members of my family even more often. I think family is

a great place for community. Yeah, it's it's sort of like the default, right, Like you know, I mean, hopefully folks have enough time that they have friends and wherever it is that they live. But I think a lot of times folks know that, like, well, at the very least, so I've got my family. Yeah, but you know what, some people don't feel that way about their families. They

didn't have the kind of childhood that I had. They don't have the close relationship with their parents or their siblings or even the close geographic proximity that I have to them. And I think that's where you need your local community all the more. If you don't feel like you have your family as one of your primary communities, all the more reason for you to find close communities where you are that are important to you and meaningful. Yeah,

and I think that is happening more often man. Well, specifically, what I'm thinking of is friends giving. Like often do we see sort of friends posting pictures from their friends giving. You know, it may not be something that they do with their family as much, or maybe they're like you said, like their family is really far away, like out of town and kind of stuff like that. But to see folks getting together and still sort of having that meaningful

relationship together is perfect. I mean that's like the perfect example of of what you're saying. Uh, And I love seeing that. Yeah, alright, Matt. So back to the beer Monday night. Hello, beautiful, beautiful? Uh you know what this way? Are you talking to me? There? The beer? You know, as this beer warmed up, I feel like I could taste more of that oak, like more of that would like that the white wine barrels that this was aged in, and it gave it like a nice sort of mellow,

delicious tone. I agree. By the way, one note that I wanted to tell our listeners proper glassware. I think it's something that needs to be addressed about that we've never talked about that on the show. And if you look at our logo, the U in the four four p O U is a tulip glass. And I think tulip glasses are probably the best glass word to drink

almost any beer out of. If you're drinking an I p A or something like that, feel free to drink it out of a pint glass, But most of these more sophisticated beers, a tulip glass is perfect for that, and part of the reason is because you can almost pretty much stick your whole nose in the glass. They I mean they funnel, they taper to like to the top, and you can get your nose in there and it kind of funnels all the smells and all the flavors right there to your nose and it just allows you

to taste what you're drinking a little better. So there are even more advanced type of glass water that you can pick up that apparently does an even better job. But basically, get too tulip glasses in your home and you can probably find one for four bucks and those are gonna be just really nice for the drink experience. Not to mention they look cool. Yeah, they make you look like you know what you're talking about. That's what we did. So thanks again to Monday Night. Hello, beautiful,

really fun beer barrel fermented wild ale with blueberries. Delicious. All right, Matt recap time first community can save you literal money, like actual money. Specifically, you can pass along and share sort of season of life items like either kids toys or clothes and even maternity clothes. It's less the case for dudes, uh, but it's definitely something to to consider. And also too, I don't know, I like

those stretchy jeans, Matt. They would have to be stretchy because I've got like short, half Korean Asian legs, which means you've got like another foot on me. Maybe maybe leave the clothes, uh. Swapping to our wives that the ladies. And yeah, another thing too is sharing sort of time

and like resources. Right, and so we got like this the date night setup that we have going on, and that's just an awesome way for us to a make sure that, like we said earlier, go on date nights, but be it just saves us so much money to not have to pay a babysitter. And that's something that we know that we can kind of depend on every other week. Yeah, and I know that you're there with my kids. You're my friend, You're part of my community.

Or if I have to ask you know, another friend to pick up my girls or something like that, that's better than hiring a service to do it because it's someone that I know and trust. Also, community helps you in a pinch. And so, like I mentioned earlier, you know what's been going on in our lives with you know, my wife's sickness, and trying to figure that out and just kind of last minute doctor's appointments and just needing some support and encouragement. You know, our community has come

through in the clutch and been there for us. It's been vital for some of the details to come up in our lives, but it's been vital for our hearts and minds to be supported in that way. And it's just been beautiful to watch our community kind of come around us and support us. And that sort of support is kind of intangible. I can't put it on a line item of a budget. Uh, this, my community made me this much money this month, but it means way

more than anything money could even buy me. Yeah, because it's not just about yeah, because it's not just about money, right, Like there's all these apps out there I'm thinking of, like the food delivery like door dash or something like that, and like, sure, you could just order take out and and have it delivered to you and effectively you have a meal, just like you would if like a neighbor

or somebody brought you some food. But how much more doesn't mean to know that you've got neighbors and friends that are who are willing to do that for you and sort of like the heart I guess behind that versus than just ordering cheap take out. Well, and we even had a friend who was busy and she said, I can cook you a meal tomorrow night, or I

can order you something on tor Dash tonight. And the fact that she was just willing to do that, uh, just that she said that, Hey, I'm really busy and I would love to cook you a meal some mon, but I will do this, I will order it for you. Now that meant so much. Yes, it's not that it's not that DoorDash sucks, it's it's like the meaning behind it. Yeah, it's a thought. It's like, Oh, someone cares enough for me too, and they're invested with me in this. They're

essentially walking through life with me. And that's what a community does. They're walking through life with you. Yes, and old lastly, community helps us to maintain a healthy and balanced life. Again, this is something that you can't really put your finger on, but deep down we all know that when you are known and when you have somebody who knows you and and understands you, that's just a better life to live. Right, And we're not just talking

about like a significant other or a spouse. We're talking about friends as well, and to have people surrounding you who do that, that's just better. Yeah. An example I came up with for that, Matt was how awesome is it when someone gives you a gift that you didn't even ask for that's perfect for you? Or when you find a gift for someone, for your friend, for someone that you know and care for that's perfect for them that they didn't ask for. I love that, And that's

like the example of community. Like that gift giving scenario only happens when two people know each other. Well, Like you can buy that thing for yourself whenever you want, but that's not that's not the same thing. And also, digital communities are awesome. I think they can provide something that in person communities can't. There's this hive mind that you can tap into with resources that might not be available right where you live. But it shouldn't replace physical

and neighborhood specific community in your life. We want you, guys, to obviously have community and to have friends, and to have people who know you, not just friends on Facebook in this group, who know your financial situation or or how you happen to get a deal on your last cable bill. Like those things are great, and we want that group to continue to be a resource for people who have questions and sort of some of the day to day practical kind of stuff. And that's what it's

there for. It's it's there to for us to support each other, to encourage each other. Yea, so to tap into resources online like our Facebook group that I think it's a lot of fun to be a part of. Just remember that the communities that you have online, that you're involved in online should be complementary to what your community in real life with the people around you looks like. Yeah, you know what actually makes me think of to man, is when you meet somebody who you've met online, like

through a group, in real life. How cool is that? Because like you have this sort of knowledge base of each other and sort of what you value and your beliefs and different whatever it is that you're talking about right in the group. But then when you get to meet in person, how cool is it? It's just so much better. It's it's so much richer, and you get excited because you think, man, we know all these other

details about each other. Now we get to like connect for real and hang out and have a beer or go ride bikes or do something real life that we're just sort of talking about. When it comes to, you know, doing that online, I think that there's something to be said for when we do actually meet, you know, different people like that in real life. There's a reason why you get excited because it's kind of like, oh cool, finally we get to do this in real life now,

this thing that we've been doing digitally. It's like, deep down we know that it's sort of imitation. It's digital when when when you do that online, but being able to do that in person is just awesome, especially when you've connected about something that's deep and meaningful to your life. So like, for instance, in our group, you know that the other people in there like craft beer and like talking about you know, money issues that matter to you, and so for you and I and for the people

in the group like that. Those are really two huge parts of what make up who you are. And the fact that you're connecting with other people that that's the case as well. If and when you do get to meet in the flesh, it's really really cool because you already have two amazing things in common and you're part of the same, the same group essentially that was formed digitally. So, folks, thanks so much for listening. We really appreciate you listening all the way to the end. Our home on the

web is how to money dot com. Check it out. We'll have some show notes up there for you, and if you like what you here, let us know, Review and subscribe on your favorite podcast app. Cheers Buddy, Cheers Man, best Friends Out, Best Friends Out,