I've just arrived back in Denmark after a couple of weeks in the US and the night I got back, my cat bit me. This was not just a little affectionate peck - Fluffy used her sharp teeth, her fangs, to create four bleeding puncture wounds in my leg. I suppose it was partly my fault – I put a call on speakerphone. Fluffy doesn't like speakerphone, because she can hear a person, but she can’t see one, so she assumes I’m some evil magician who has put a person inside a little glowing box, and she bite...
Jan 11, 2015•6 min
I’ve been living in Denmark so long I sometimes lose perspective. I forget what it’s like not to live in Denmark. Specifically, I forget that in most countries, adult men and women don’t want to walk around in an elf hat, even if it is Christmastime. In Denmark, the red and white elf hat is part of any Christmas activity where alcohol is involved, and a few where when alcohol isn’t involved. Children occasionally wear elf hats, which are called nissehue in Danish. But you’re more likely to see a...
Dec 05, 2014•5 min
There was no How to Live in Denmark podcast last week, and I apologize for that. I have been busy studying for my Danish citizenship exam. As some of you may know, Denmark is allowing double citizenship as of next year. That means you're are allowed to keep your home country passport - in my case, USA - while also becoming a Danish citizen. Personally, I'm a little concerned that this may be overturned if a right wing government takes power next year. Danske Folkeparti, which is now the biggest ...
Nov 29, 2014•6 min
Hello, and welcome to the How to Live in Denmark podcast. I'm Kay Xander Mellish. Whenever I hear that Denmark is the happiest country in the world, I think of Donald Duck. Donald Duck is extremely popular in Denmark, as he is in all Nordic countries. He is much more popular than Mickey Mouse. He even has his own Danish name - Anders And. Which means, basically. Anders the Duck. I don't know how much you know about Disney characters, but Donald Duck - or Anders Duck - is kind of a second-class c...
Nov 16, 2014•7 min
It's been a beautiful autumn here in Denmark. Warm, with golden sun, blue skies, red and yellow and orange leaves on the trees. Just gorgeous. And unusually warm for Denmark. It's always exciting when, instead of wearing your winter coat every day from October to April, you can wear it every day from November to April. But this unusually pleasant weather can’t help but spark conversation about global warming. So far the biggest impact climate change has had in Denmark are some severe rainstorms,...
Nov 02, 2014•8 min
Have you ever seen the movie The Wizard of Oz? It's a classic. When Dorothy arrives in the land of Oz, the first thing she's asked is - are you a good witch, or a bad witch? I was having lunch with a friend this week, and, over club sandwiches she said, its a shame there's only one word for foreigner in Danish, when actually there's two types of foreigner here. I got her point, even though I think there's only one word for foreigner in most languages. But what she's was really saying is, there's...
Oct 05, 2014•7 min
I did a little crowdsourcing for this week's podcast. I asked some of our listeners, and some people on Facebook - what were some of the small cultural mistakes - the dos and don'ts, the faux pas - you made when you first arrived in Denmark? I got a whole selection of answers. Don't keep your shoes on while entering someone's home was one thing. Don't arrive even a few minutes late was another. The 8:00 meeting is not an 8:05 meeting. Trying to bum a cigarette - not done in Denmark. Calling afte...
Sep 21, 2014•5 min
You wouldn't know it, but Denmark and China have much more in common than both having red flags and a love for green technology. Denmark and China have a surprisingly deep relationship. It helps that the Chinese have a deep love for Hans Christian Andersen.
Sep 14, 2014•7 min
I was in London this week, and did a little fall wardrobe shopping. I got tired after walking for awhile, and it was lunchtime, so I sat down in a pub. I had a beer and a fish and chips and a British guy next to me was also having a beer and fish and chips and so we just chatted through lunch. We talked about politics, the weather, the job market. After lunch, we waved goodbye and I went back to shopping. It was a fun lunch, but I never found out his name. The reason I mention this is that it ne...
Aug 31, 2014•6 min
I get a lot of mail at the How To Live in Denmark podcast, and some of it is from people who want to move to Denmark, but they’re not sure what to do to make money once they get here. But, I do speak English, they say. Can I make money in Denmark just off of just speaking English? Generally, no. No you can’t. I mean, I do, but I was an experienced journalist before I got here. But English is not a rare commodity in Denmark. Danish children start learning English when they’re six years old. And b...
Aug 24, 2014•6 min
When you think you’re talking to the authorities in Denmark, you’re often not talking to the authorities. If it comes to bus service, train service, unemployment compensation, homeless shelters, construction, even fire protection and ambulance services – you will be talking to a private company hired by the authorities. At any rate, some things are still run directly by the government, like the immigration service and local affairs. So there are some times when you do need to speak to civil serv...
Aug 17, 2014•6 min
I got an email a couple of weeks ago at howtoliveindenmark.com from a Danish woman who now lives in Germany. She says that this podcast helps her keep in touch with life back home, but that she doesn’t really like it. She writes: “ I have to tell you, that almost every story has a negative ring to it when you portray your thoughts on Denmark and Danes. I cannot shake the feeling, that you really deep down, do not like Danes or Denmark. I find this sad, as you have been living there now over a de...
Jun 28, 2014•5 min
If you’re in Denmark right now, you’ll know that we’re coming up on the year’s longest day this week. June 21. You know it because it starts getting light at 4 in the morning, and the sun doesn’t go down until 10:30 or 11 at night and then you’re up again at 4 in the morning. In between it never gets really dark, just like in December it never gets very light. During the dark times, I know that I wait and wait for the light times to come. Sometimes I count – only 3 more months until the light ti...
Jun 15, 2014•5 min
Hello, and welcome to the How To Live in Denmark podcast. I’m Kay Xander Mellish. I don’t regret many things in life, but I do regret not going to a party I was invited to almost 14 years ago. That was in 2000, when I first arrived in Denmark. It was a party to mark the opening of the Ørseund Bridge, which connects Denmark and Sweden. There were no cars on the bridge yet, so you could easily walk or bike between these two countries that had been bitter enemies for hundreds of years. At one point...
Jun 08, 2014•6 min
Ordinarily don’t get my technology news from the local newspaper sold by the homeless in Denmark, but I did this week. First of all, I learned that you can pay your homeless newspaper seller by text message. If you don’t have loose change, as I often don’t, you can send a text to the newspaper seller’s registration number, along with the amount you want to give him, and the seller gets paid right away. Secondly, I learned that some homeless people have iPhones. (pause). Not my particular seller,...
May 31, 2014•6 min
Danes and Norwegians were part of the same country for hundreds of years, and they’re still family. Written Danish and written Norwegian are very similar – so similar that I once tried to find a Danish-Norwegian dictionary and was told there was no such thing. The spoken language is a little more different, but still Danes and Norwegians can understand what the other is saying. Danes and Norwegians like each other. They care about each other. They even sometimes cheer for each other’s football t...
May 23, 2014•6 min
If you live in city or a big town in Denmark, you may notice that the weekends are getting very quiet just about now. The streets outside my home in Copenhagen are empty. The streetlights just change from red to green and back again, but no cars ever pull up. Nobody comes to cross the street. It’s a little like a scene a movie right after the zombie apocalypse. This is because all the Danish people have gone to their summerhouses. On Friday afternoons, Danish people like to pack up their cars, d...
May 10, 2014•6 min
When you go back to your country of origin, it’s alarming sometimes to realize how Danish you are becoming. I’ve been on vacation in the USA for a couple of weeks. But I’m back now, and it only takes a few minutes after I arrive at Kastrup airport before something happens to destroy the relaxing effect of 2 weeks off and several thousand kroner spent on spas, hotels and tasty dinners. The jolt back to reality usually happens at baggage claim, when one of my fellow fliers of the Danish persuasion...
May 04, 2014•5 min
If you’ve seen it, you know the Little Mermaid is only about four feet tall – that’s 1.25 meters. You probably own pillows that are bigger than the Little Mermaid. At any rate, all the Copenhagen tourist boat trips go right by it, so your tourists can get the photos they need for their Instagram or Facebook feeds. If they want, they can climb out of the boat and onto the slippery rock where the mermaid sits for a photo. There are plenty of other things to do in Denmark. In this podcast, I outlin...
Apr 06, 2014•7 min
Denmark is a pretty good place to raise children. Working hours are shorter, and it’s perfectly OK to leave work at 3 or 4 o’clock to pick up your kids. There’s a good system for early childhood health. A nurse visits to your home when your child is a baby, and then there are regular checkups with doctor. If your child has the sniffles, you can take off work and stay home with her – the first two days are paid. And, of course, there’s the day care system. It’s not free, but it’s reasonably price...
Mar 30, 2014•6 min
There was big news this week for foreigners in Denmark. It looks double citizenship will soon be permitted. Previously, if you wanted to be a Danish citizen, you had to give up citizenship in your home country. Meanwhile Danes who had moved abroad, say to the US or Australia, and became citizens there had to give up their Danish citizenship. There’s now been a proposal to get rid of all that. It hasn’t been finally approved, but all the Danish parties say they’ll vote for it, with the exception ...
Mar 23, 2014•6 min
There’s a new mosque opening down the street from me this spring, a big one. It will be the first mosque with minarets in Denmark, although the minarets are legally prohibited from calling to prayer. The people behind the mosque are doing everything they can to blend in with the local neighborhood – they even went to observe at a local church service a couple of Sundays ago. They were probably the only ones there. There are a lot of Muslims in Denmark, about 250,000 out of a population of 5-and-...
Mar 16, 2014•5 min
As an American in Denmark, I get to experience Danish stereotypes about Americans on a regular basis: we are superficial, too outspoken and direct, and are apparently controlled by a small cabal of right-wing nutcases. But the Danes have stereotypes about other nationalities as well. Spaniards and Italians are seen as fun and sexy and romantic, but unlikely to arrive on time. Eastern Europeans work too hard, at wages that are much too low, at least by Danish standards. Asian immigrants are seen ...
Mar 09, 2014•6 min
Danish names are very strongly stratified by age. Ole and Finn and Knud and Kaj and Jørn and Jørgen and to some extent Poul and Per, are over 50. Their wives and sisters and secret lovers are Inger and Karin and Kirsten and Ulla. Or Bente. Another guaranteed old ladies’ name is Bente. Bent is the male version. Being named Bent is a problem for Danes who travel, because in many English-speaking countries, ‘bent’ is old-fashioned slang for ‘gay.’ In those countries, if you hold out your hand and s...
Mar 02, 2014•5 min
Finding a job anywhere is a headache, and Denmark is no different. And let's be frank, if the employer has a choice between a foreigner and a Dane, they're probably going to hire the Danish person. The Danish person knows the language, the Danish person knows the culture, the Danish person knows what type of cheese to bring for the Friday morning shared breakfast. Nevertheless, it is possible for a foreigner to find work in Denmark. Here are my tips for a successful job search in Denmark....
Feb 23, 2014•7 min
If you are a romance novelist, the Danish man is not your dream man. He will not write poetry and pursue his beloved to the ends of the Earth. He won't send flowers, he won't buy chocolates. He won't even help carry packages. That said, if you’re a feminist, a Danish man IS your dream man. He will cook and help with the housework, and spend time with the kids. He'll respect your opinion, and he won't force himself on you. In fact, you may have to force yourself on him. But if you do, he’ll usual...
Feb 16, 2014•5 min
A lot of the mail I get at howtoliveindenmark.com get is from men, wanting to know how they can meet women in Denmark. I can understand this. Danish women are very beautiful. And I can tell you now, most of them will not immediately exclude you because you have a different skin color. I know of several babies of mixed heritage here in Denmark. That said, dating in Denmark is hard, even for the Danes, and it will probably be hard for you too. That’s because the process that works in much of the r...
Feb 09, 2014•7 min
I’m looking out the window as I record, and it’s snowing again. It’s pretty, but it’s not a novelty any more. It’s been like this for the past couple of weeks, Danish winter weather. Nearly every day there’s fresh snow and ice. When I wake up on winter mornings, it’s still dark, and cold, and I can hear the wind whistling outside my window. Every day I think, ahhhh, I don’t want to get up. But I do. Of course everyone in Denmark suffers a little bit during the winter. But I feel particularly bad...
Feb 02, 2014•5 min
I play a little game sometime when I look at Danish people. I imagine them as Vikings. It’s easy now that big beards are in fashion on young men. Sometimes on the metro I’ll look up at the hipster guy playing with his iPhone next to me and imagine him wearing a big fur cloak. Maybe a rope belt, with a sword dangling from it. I imagine him stepping off the boat in Newfoundland in the year 1000, freaking out the local American Indians.
Jan 26, 2014•6 min
A few years ago, during the peak July vacation season, SAS had to cancel a large number of flights out of Denmark. This is because too many SAS pilots had taken vacation...during the vacation season. In Denmark, the needs of the employee are often more important than the needs of the customer. The post Danes and Work: My vacation flight was cancelled, because the pilot was on vacation appeared first on How to Live in Denmark ....
Jan 19, 2014•5 min
