Holiday Wellness Unwrapped: 3-Step Survival Guide for the Festive Season (81)

Inhale , chest and belly expand , exhale . Let it all go One more . Inhale and exhale . I'm going to return to the sensation of where your body meets the earth . I'll let that be something you can return to during our time together today . So , now that I have my voice back , I want to talk about the most wonderful time of the year .

So we are , like , ready for full holiday mode . Thanksgiving is this week . There is so much going on .

We're going to move into all the winter holidays , christmas , hanukkah , all the things and I think it's really important to acknowledge that , yes , the holidays totally can be a wonderful , beautiful time , and it's okay if it's not , because I don't think that gets a not voice .

So during today's episode , we're really going to focus on ways that we can check in with ourselves and take care of our mental health , our physical health , and establish the foundation we need to move through the holidays in a way that's going to bring us grounding and peace . And it's easier said than done .

It's going to take practice , but having this awareness and conversation is a really great first step . So , no matter how you feel about the holidays whether you love it , hate it , everything in between this episode is going to have something for you to help you feel more grounded and at ease as we move through this holiday season .

So I took a little bit of a poll from our listeners to see , like , how are you all actually feeling about the holidays ? Right , because we are in a time of year where there's this rhetoric that we should be feeling joyful Again . The most wonderful time of the year .

It's supposed to be this really exuberant joyful thing , and that's happening amid some of our busiest work , deadlines , our most full social and family calendars . Then there's decreased sunlight , there's additional financial pressure , grief and loss might feel extra heavy during this time , and family dynamics can be really challenging .

So that's a lot , and it's okay if it's not the most wonderful time of the year for you . It's okay if you're feeling the weight of those things .

So I'm going to share with you the three tools that I use to move through , honestly , most everything and the ones I've been really applying to the holidays over the last few years for myself to feel more grounded as I'm moving through it . So the first one is awareness and , honestly , I think awareness is forever and always going to be the first step .

If we're not aware of what is , there's not a lot we can do about it . So bringing our awareness and attention to how we're feeling about the holidays is a really great first step . So I want you to take a moment right now , as you're listening , to just take a deep breath and notice how you actually feel about the holidays .

What comes up for you when you think about the holidays . Do you feel more stressed ? Do you feel less stressed ? Maybe ? Start to notice what arises in the body when you think about the holidays , with the gentle curiosity there's no judgment here .

Just start to lean into what's alive for you when it comes to the holidays and know that every year it can be really different . Every day , every moment it's going to change . I wanted to be aware of how you all feel about the holidays , so I threw up a poll on Instagram for listeners to share .

Do you feel more stressed or less stressed during the holidays and , based off of responses , we really got like an almost 50-50 response on this , a little bit leaning towards feeling less stressed during the holidays , but so many of you are feeling more stressed too .

So I just want us to acknowledge and be aware that while , yes , this can be a really wonderful , relaxing time of the year , it can also be a really stressful , overwhelming one as well . So it's just something to be aware of .

And then I also just wanted to lean in a little more and learn and be aware of what words , what comes up for you when you think about the holidays . So maybe just take a moment for yourself , like what words come to your mind when you think about the holiday season . This is what listeners shared .

There were a lot of responses about family , which I'm not surprised , but it's kind of cool to just lean into . Like family is really prominent during this time of year , so that might have positive connotations for you . It might have negative connotations , it might be a little bit of both .

Really just acknowledging that family dynamics play a big role during the holidays . Another word that came up was eggnog , so maybe there's some of those like holiday things that you love that are like a comfort and nostalgia that come to mind .

I got words , calm in serene , and then we also got words from listeners that were busy , expensive food , family obligations . So finances are something that everyone is going to have different things going on . There's a lot of emotional weight in charge that can come around finances . Same thing with food . People have a wide range of relationships with food .

So sometimes , like all the holiday , food can be a really positive thing for you to think about . It can also be a really triggering thing . So if food is an element that's at play for you , it's a really important to acknowledge that as well . And then family , again another one where we all have a different relationship .

It's changing and unfolding and you just got to lean in to be aware of what this is like for you right now as we move into this season . So awareness is always the first step , and something you can do and apply is being aware of how you're entering different situations during the holiday .

So I often like to if I know I have like a family event or a social event coming up like before I go into that phase , take a moment to breathe , do a body scan . Just notice what my body is feeling , what's going on , so that I know how to take care of myself as I move through that . The next thing that's really important to lean into is acceptance .

So the holidays are a time of year where there are a lot of shoulds . Right , you should feel a certain way , you should spend time with certain people , you should buy certain presents . Whatever those shoulds are , we want to acknowledge those , be aware of them and accept what you're actually feeling . Right , if you don't feel joyful , accept that .

If you feel conflicted about some relationships you have , accept that . If you wish that your family dynamics were different or your holidays were different , accept that too . It's important to remember that there is no way you are supposed to feel . You don't have to feel joyful , you don't have to feel any certain way .

How you feel right now is okay , so don't resist it . And also , it's really important to lean into a sense of common humanity . Like some of the shoulds can feel extra heavy when we're like everyone's family is this way . Everyone feels a certain way during this time of year . What's wrong with me ? I'm so isolated and alone that I don't .

A big part of this is to really acknowledge that how you feel is okay and all humans feel this way sometimes . So you're not alone in it . Know that you are supported in it , so accept what you're feeling . I find a really helpful way to work with acceptance is so we talked before about becoming aware .

A body scan is a great way to just notice what's alive for us and then you can focus on acceptance with a skill called noting , and noting is when we just notice what's present without judgment . You can practice noting by getting really simple with noticing if what you're feeling is pleasant , unpleasant or neutral .

So if we talked before about doing that body scan and then you want to practice some acceptance with noting , you can do that scan of the body and then just get curious about how each part of the body feels . So notice , like your head , is it pleasant , unpleasant or neutral ? And repeat that in your mind .

So for me right now , if you were listening in on my practice , it would sound like head neutral , shoulders unpleasant , chest unpleasant , stomach neutral , hips pleasant . You know , just move through . You can start with the parts of the body .

You can notice that with emotions that might arise or thoughts that might arise , rather than getting caught up in their story , just noticing if it's pleasant , unpleasant or neutral , because it's already there . So just acknowledge what already is . And then the third step is where the real work comes in , and this is what I like to call compassion in action .

I think compassion is an integral part of mindfulness . I think it is the secret sauce to life . I need it . I need to practice it every day . So the first place , I like to start with compassion . We talked about being aware of what's happening . We practiced accepting it , acknowledging it , and then we really want to meet it with a quality of kindness .

That's what compassion is . So once I know that something's there , I'm no longer resisting it , I'm accepting it . I like to ask it or ask myself , like , what do you need right now ? So if I notice I'm about to go to a holiday party and I feel anxious , I'm no longer resisting the anxiety . It's here , I'm gonna be with it .

So I like to bring a hand to my heart and just say , like , what do you need right now ? Honor that knee , and we're gonna start brainstorming what this can look like together .

So when I reached out to listeners , I got curious with you about what support would look like for you this holiday season and this question is so important because you're creating like a resource guide for yourself . You're mapping out the tools and putting them in your toolkit of what you need to feel supported . So one person shared financial security .

This is so important , right ? Financial security is key and , again , there's a lot of financial stress around the holidays . So something we can lean into what would support look like around ? That could be setting boundaries Maybe getting creative with people your gift giving with of .

Maybe , instead of giving everyone a gift , it's a secret Santa concept or a white elephant or you pick a limit or , you know , doing homemade gifts if you have the time and capacity for that , but it's something important to acknowledge and have the conversations with the people in your circle around . Like you know , these are my boundaries with money this holiday .

This is the reality . This is what's going on . It isn't a reflection of how I feel about you . Based on what I said . This is what I can do and what I'm willing to do right now , and that's okay . Another person shared and I really love this .

Share is something that would be supportive , would be lowering my expectations so I can enjoy the other activities without feeling like I'm getting behind and being able to choose activities that I'll actually enjoy and not feeling bad about saying no . I think this one is so key because it has us , you know , checking in with . What are our expectations .

What am I expecting going into this event , into this holiday season ?

What is a level setting expectation that I can set here so there's awareness , there's acceptance by setting that level setting expectation knowing what we can do healthily and know what we can't do and then setting a boundary is communicating that with others , even when it is hard , knowing that it's okay to set and establish those boundaries .

I think another great thing is like setting new traditions . If you know something's not supportive for you and isn't going to support your mental well-being , it's okay to say no . You have my permission slip . It is okay to say no to the things that aren't going to serve and honor you .

Things you can do if you're staying with family over the holidays right , it can be beautiful being in a house full of people and in my experience it can be a lot and throws me off . So things I have to do is like stay in my room in the morning a little bit longer , meditate , go on walks , move , breathe , take little pockets of alone time .

Just because it's the holidays doesn't mean you need to be with people 24-7 . You can continue to establish your routines and the things that you need to feel supported and then , you know , maybe have a plan of people you can reach out to . If you know I'm going to be in a room full of people . It's going to be really challenging .

Here are my go-to people I'm going to send a text to for support or these are the people I'm going to meet up with after to fill my cup back up . So , as we continue to move through the holiday season , I'm going to share different meditations and practices to be like your go-to resource guide .

So be sure to follow this podcast , if you aren't already , so that you'll be the first to see these meditations that you can use in your wellness toolkit to move through the holiday season . But what I want to leave with you with now is here's our starting place .

We're going to make our resource guide together , so I invite you right now to take a deep breath in through your nose and out through your mouth . Let's do two more like this Inhale and exhale . One more inhale and exhale . Let's start with awareness here .

So maybe write down or just call to your mind what are like three to five expectations you have for yourself and for others and for the holiday season . Just notice how you're feeling . Going into it . What are your expectations ? Being aware of this is really important . What expectations are you putting on yourself , on others , and then how are you really feeling ?

And then acceptance . So , now that we are aware of these expectations and we're aware of how we feel , just start to notice . Is it pleasant , unpleasant or neutral ? Then acknowledge that whatever you're feeling is okay . Maybe , if there's a big emotion , let's just take a moment to breathe with it together rather than resisting it .

Know that all humans feel this way sometimes .

Time for some compassion and action . I want you to make a plan for before , during and after the holidays to manage expectations and care for yourself . So write down like three to five things . What are you going to do before ?

So before , it's going to look like moving my body , making sure I practice and have my grounding time , my alone time , before I move into spaces where I'm with a bunch of people .

During , when I'm in it , it's probably going to look like taking some breaks , going on a walk , maybe even practicing like finger tapping I'll talk about this in a different meditation when I'm feeling overwhelmed , and then giving myself like cozy holiday comforts , letting myself indulge , maybe taking the pressure off of myself and letting it be okay if I fall out of

my routine . And then after what am I going to need to take care of myself ? Maybe , again , it's going to be movements , maybe some time to be creative . You're just totally vetch out , so come with your action list . Maybe it's going to be listening to an episode that you love or a meditation that you love from this podcast .

So thank you for taking the time to listen , thank you for taking the time to lean in to the holidays with me . I hope that you are able to be with all that arises for you this holiday season and that you find moments to ground down and find a sense of peace within you as you move through all the things happening around .

You Know that how you feel today is okay , know that you're not alone and know that you are supported . So let's continue to move through this holiday season , just like we do everything , one breath at a time .

So , as we've been talking about the holidays , I know that Black Friday is just around the corner and it's a time where you're going to be getting all the ads , to spend money on all the things , and I invite you to just consider investing in a different way this Black Friday .

For as little as $3 a month , you can join the Dream Team , which is a group of supporters who make this podcast possible , and every month , we pick a different community cause to donate to . For example , in October , we supported relief funding in the Middle East .

So this Black Friday , I invite you to do something different by signing up for the Dream Team and supporting this podcast and communities that you care about . Just click the link in the show notes .