Some Time With... Ryan Alexander-Tanner!

Hey, there are Fana Ritos. Welcome back to a brand new episode of how Rude Tanner Ritos. Today we have a crossover that no Full House fan or critic saw coming. We are sitting down with Ryan Alexander Tanner, the author of the full House Reviewed blog. Four years he wrote blog posts absolutely roasting full House and we're not talking about not just gentle teasing here, but full on scorched earth criticism. He hated our hugs, he mocked our morals,

I can't believe this, right you are you.

Never in a million years thought that that anyone would read your blog, particularly us, and then ask you to be.

On the show. But sir, welcome, welcome, well, welcome to the full.

How many years did you spend writing the full House Reviewed blog?

Well? I did other things in that time.

Okay, that's disappointing.

You want entirely and entirely devoted to hating full House.

Commitment.

I was doing other things. But I think it was like four years, right.

It was one hundred and ninety two episodes full House.

Yeah?

Yeah, did you review all of them?

Or no?

I did you did?

Wow?

That's dedication.

That is such dedication.

I didn't get a master's degree.

But you did.

But you you got one in in uh full House reviews, So fair enough.

Yeah, so what inspired you?

By the way, for those of you who didn't listen to our podcast a little while back, where we read uh Ryan Alexander Tanner's full House Reviewed blog, which was all about how ridiculous uh full House is and how really dumb it is if you if you pay attention, and we read it. It was a It was definitely a non kid friendly episode. It's a little more explicit, but damn is it hilarious. It was so much fun because you literally said all of the things.

That we say all the time.

Yeah, I didn't see it. Can I just say it real quick? It was so gracious of you hat me on.

It was almost like a healing experience to be like they're reading it and.

They like it. Like if you.

Honestly, like I'm a sensitive person, if you had read it and been like, this is so hurtful to.

Me, I would have felt terrible. So it was revalidating.

Actually, like there's gonna be an ambush.

No, no, no, it's not gonna be like Zelenski in the Oval Office.

No, we're not gonna Yeah, although you should have want a suit. No, I thank you, thank you, thank you. No, but really, like we I mean, that's the show is ridiculous.

It is ridiculous, and it's fun to pour out the ridiculousness of it because it's like it's like so many people love it and it does have that like warm fuzzy place in people's heart. But it's so eighties nineties sitcom. You know, it's every sitcom trope. It's all of the silliness, and you know it it was a kid family TV show. And I think the funny thing is is that we never took ourselves seriously even with like fuller.

We were like, we we are very self.

Aware, we know what we are and lean into the cheese.

Yeah yeah, but.

Really, your your review is what I'm thinking all of the time.

Well, thank you, and it is.

It's very I mean, it is very witty and funny. Even if you don't agree, if you're a Full House lover to your core, you can still read this blog and appreciate it.

For the guys, very you can love something and make fun of it.

Yes, that's it is okay.

We're giving you permission to love something and make fun of it.

Ll just make fun of it if you want to that you do whatever you want. I'm not here to tell you, but it's okay. We're giving your permission.

A friendship arc right, what we're having.

Nowhere, it is in our own bottles income And yeah, I mean I got a lot of feedback doing it, and it was pretty equally people who loved and hated Full House.

You know. Some people were like, yes, these are my.

Negative feelings, and we were like, I love the show, but you know, I can still laugh at your commentary here. But I think you had a question before that was the start of this. I don't remember we.

Don't love neither do we we did. I think it was what, like, what inspired you to do it?

Oh?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, Well I used to have a day job, like I think you quit my day job in two thousand and seven or something, okay, and I would just you know, it was like to start a YouTube and I just look at crap on the internet all the time, right, And then I actually like, I'm an illustrator and a comic book artist.

That's what I do.

We heard that you you actually did the art for Dave's Bread. Yeah, amazing, because that's what we buy. I love, I love, I love what they stand for. It's amazing. So you again, even one more, one more notch in the in yeah, in the work as well.

And then so I quit to go do a book. And then it was I don't know, I guess I needed a hobby.

It's like I spent a bunch of years having a crappy job and then training get my career going. And so then and I finished my first book, and I just had a free time and I was anxious, you know, so I know those and I think I wanted to read it and it didn't exist. So I was like, oh, I'll make it, you know. And then and originally I wanted to do Family Matters. Okay, it was not on DVD, so I used to get you know, Netflix discs in the mail one right, yeah, every time the physical Netflix, Yeah, discs.

In the mail.

Remember, and then we're so I loved.

I think it caught on.

Like right around when maybe I would have been like, all right, this has been going. There was literally like one week where it got posted on some forum and it went from having like, you know, three hundred readers.

To like ten thousand, like in two days.

There's amazing.

Was that like was like, oh my god, Like was that weird? When all of a sudden it just kind of blew up.

It was a little bit like right now, what I was just doing this thing and all of a sudden, Yeah, I mean it was crazy, and I think you get a little bit excited off that, you know. And just I had a lot of interactions with people. I mean I did it anonymously, but there was like a whole community around it.

And also like it was pretty negative, I would.

Say, but also like I got a lot of stuff like people were finishing their degree or they're raising kids at home and they were like, this just helps me, Like I read one of these a week, or I watched the show, or I jum after my baby goes to bed, and you know, they should probably be like studying something important, but it's you.

Know, this is important.

It's postmodern.

Yeah, yes, exactly, it's a it's a lesson in postmodern uh writing structure.

People love the predictability of like every Friday they're going to open their computer and read, you know, the latest post or watch the episode and then read the post.

And the people like that routine predictability. In an opening song I've Happened To It said.

That like every Friday morning in the office, you know, did you read the new f HR?

And that was always cool.

It's crazy.

It was just for fun, and it was like a writing exercise, I guess, you know, like I write for work and you write a lot of email and stuff, and it was just like, you know whatever, four hundred words a week, you know, and I probably like a weirdo.

It's definitely like an obsessive weird so I know, it's like.

No obsessive things to do, you know what I mean. That's what the nets for.

Well, but originally now it's just for destroying the world. But no, but I mean, I I love that, Like you just picked something. You're like, I'm gonna this is gonna be my funny creative like comedy, and it's great. It's really really great. Now we have a few least favorite episodes, uh ourselves, Seacrews of course, being the number one most hated episode across the board.

The Sad season one.

The third episode where the guys go out on some fishing trip.

It's a fishing boat.

Yeah, it's a fishing boat and they wind up with two girl whatever and it's terrible.

Uh.

Jeff Franklin agrees. We agree, but that one is pretty bad.

But baby love.

The Howe episode, Howie episode, How did you feel about Howie? We need to know?

I didn't like him?

Who does welcome?

Right?

The obsession obsess.

We never came back, right, am I correct?

He did.

He came back to the wedding, but he was a different actor. It was a different kid.

So that was was that.

No, the little kid was we used a girl playing a boy character.

Didn't we know it was a It was a older one.

It was girl twins playing Howie as a toddler and I mean yeah, and then when they were old for the wedding, Yeah.

I like how like people who are listening probably know, and we're all like, oh.

We don't know about our own show, which is the entire reason we started doing this podcast was because we were like realizing.

That we've never watched the show.

You watched it, really, we've never watched the show. This is literally the first time we're watching all of the episodes, and we were like, well, that's why we did the podcast, because we're like, what even happens in.

This you were we were taping our live audience shows on.

Friday nights, and I didn't care about watching myself. I think most of us were like, eh, weird.

Can I ask you a question?

I have a curiosity, Yes, I'm curious, Like how famous you are? Like do you buy your own groceries? You joy my groceries.

We're very important money, very famous, honey boy.

Do I let me.

Tell you how often you get bothered?

Like how often do people come up and talk and let's be all the time?

Yeah, yeah, but it's not most of the time.

I mean luckily, like full House fans are pretty sweet and loyal and like excited because even if it's adults, it's adults that grew up watching you as a kid, so you have this like special place in their heart, you know what I mean. It's like it's not like other actors are like, God, I hated your kids character.

So they're like, oh my god, Yeah, I'm so excited all the time.

And when your grocery shopping or I do groceries, do my own grocery shopping and having a.

Really like a stressful day and then someone comes up and episode.

You know is yeah, in the middle of yelling, like yelling at your kids in public, and someone comes up and you're like.

Right or during like there's you just don't want to be bothered by it, but wheah.

Or you know, like they they well.

One of the best worst things that ever happened was when right after Bob passed, I had paparazzi just outside of my house. You know, by the way, I've rent my house. If that gives you any idea of of quote unquote how famous I am, it's not.

I'm a normal person. And anyway, so I.

Came, I had come out of my house and they were getting.

Pictures of all of us.

But they happened to get a picture of my daughter, who was I think thirteen or fourteen at the.

Time, with a hoodie on, and they put that.

Picture online and in magazines and we're like, Jody Sweeten looking tired and sad gesus my kid.

You're like, come on.

He was like really.

I was like, hey, I'm getting mistaken as a fourteen year old girl. She's like yeah, and I look like a forty year old woman. And I was like, well, it's working out for one of us. But no, the moments like that, when you're just like, you know, or when they just try and intentionally antagonize you on camera

As long as the intentions are nice and they're not like screaming or drawing attention. It's like, don't draw attention, Like, let's kind of keep this on the down low, if you know what I mean. But yeah, I know. It's always it's always a wonderful thing when people come up and recognize you and say hi, as long as they're nice about it.

Yeah. Yeah, instructions for your listeners be.

Nice about it, and they are, Yeah are they are. We have the best fans, we really do.

Yeah.

And we have the best haters too, apparently, right we do.

At least, you know what, hate on it, but at least be funny. That's my only requirement. If you're gonna if you're gonna hate, be funny about it. Otherwise it's boring. But this was, I mean, this was great.

What do you have? Do you have a favorite episode?

Like a favorite either a favorite one to hate or one that you hate the least either way.

I don't know about that, but I think the funniest episode to make fun of y like, say by the Bell has the Jesse takes right, Yeah.

That's like. And then I think for full House it's the Papoli episode.

Yeah, who died?

And then you feel really upset.

Oh, we haven't all selling it.

I'll say it here, I said it on the blog. If you watch it, you'll you haven't gotten that one yet.

I think I got that one. See it.

The course of events, Danny kills PAPOOLI I promise you Papoo.

Makes a big mass in the kitchen, and.

Then Jody is here for this who you think he loves?

Alternate theory.

So I have every time, I just go, here's what I think, and I go off on some wild, weird tangent of what's really going on in the Tanner house.

One.

We've decided that there is some sort of money laundering or insurance fraud going on because Helen the hell Danny Tanner affords that house with all of those things and and hundreds of thousands of dollars of remodels and you know, renovations.

How's the affording?

I mean, wake up sand nice, but come on, it ain't paying that kind of money, you know. I don't know, lear show, local morning show host, morning shows, I don't know.

You know what I mean.

Yeah, it's let me tell you it ain't not for that house.

Have that house?

You know?

Or like it was also the eighties.

Case, but they were though because it was the eighties and the nineties and you could actually live like that on a normal person's salary.

That was yeah, before everything was bad.

Uh No, I uh, I think that like the fact that you got such a following of people who like hate watched or hate read.

But also loved the show.

I mean, I think that that actually is a weird testament to like how popular and like good it is almost because it's so silly and family and cheesy, and yet it's still this part of American.

Like pop culture, you know, Cannon, like.

It's in the sitcom canon like it or not, you know, Like I was actually going to my speaking of nostalgia, I was in the airport going to my high school reunion when I got messaged by the show.

The airport, which was like the total But.

Yeah, I mean it's also like, you know, I used to come home from school and you had twelve channels and you're like Full Houses on for an hour.

I'm just gonna watch it, you know, and.

Like you guys are in my psyche. It's just there, you know, like there's nothing you can do about.

It's true.

Do you think you were your reactions to Full House was that? Do you think it was more reaction to the era that we were in the late eighties early nineties the cheese because we weren't the only ridiculous sitcom on TV, we were just maybe the most famous one at the time.

I don't know, Well, you guys are definitely like the the template. You know, it was like that show worked and then there were like six more at the same show, all from the same product.

We were the template.

Yeah, it's sort of like the McDonald's or like the Mickey Mouse of those kinds, you know, or like.

It's like, well, once they find something that hits execs or like we should just do only that, right until everyone's sick of it and they're like, we never want to do that again.

Yeah, but.

So yeah, it's kind of like the og I guess that type of show. I mean, it's very abrasive. I think was part of like everyone on the show. It's like it's wholesome, you know, and it's always got a moral in gentle music and stuff.

But it's also like.

The morals never like hey, just get out of people's face, you know, right.

Like Jesse Stopp being a dick.

Like, let's play baseball.

You don't have to have a moment, but don't do it in the middle of the baseball game.

Okay.

So that's one of the things we talk about all the time, is that this is the Tanners world and everyone is just living with it or living in it. This is this is the family that you hate to see coming at the airport, to a sporting event, to any sort of gathering.

You're like, oh right, no matter what it is, it's they're gonna make it about them, yes, and it's their world and it's.

Only gonna be about how this affects them.

And they're gonna hold up your kid's performance, They're gonna hold up other people's, you.

Know, lives because the Tanners have to do what the Tanners have to do.

They don't care performance. Their dad's gonna come on stage, right, they're gonna get to go again.

They get to go again. And also all those other kids, their parents aren't even there, right, Well, they wanted to be there, but the Tanners took up so much room that they had to stand outside and watch.

Because yeah, character syndrome, like when oh my god, yeah, that's full houses fault.

Totally true, totally true.

Did you ever reach a point like, so you did this blog for four years? Did you ever get to a point where like what did I start?

Like?

Why did you ever regret starting this blog? How do you want to finish the hundred ninety two episodes?

I don't know I finished it like ten years ago or something, so I don't know, you know. I mean I think I got about halfway when it blew up and I was like, well, now I'm in it, And I don't know. I think too it's like you should have better routines, like exercise or something.

But it's just like, in hindsight, I don't understand how I ever did that or had time.

Yeah, right when I was young and energetic, Yeah.

I didn't have as much responsibility. But I mean, I honestly don't remember. I feel but I think like waking up on Friday morning and having like fifty comments by the time you wake up and reading through them and stuff, there was something you know about that I built up an audience. There's no way I would have finished it well.

And it's that was like the early days of the internet, when it was fun and it was you know, and you kind of did bond with like your internet friends and your like little groups and stuff.

It was that was a blog.

I mean, I don't even know if you could do a blog anymore.

I don't know.

I have to be substacks or newsletters still, right, I wish I.

Had done it as a substack because people would have to pay.

Tarn it too late.

Yeah, it was. The timing was uniquely bad.

I mean, even as like a professional artist and stuff like the marketing piece is not my strong suit, you know, Like I think there was.

A way to monetize it, but it was for fun. It's good to just do things for fun, I think.

Yeah, really, yeah, sometimes it is nice to just do something for fun and not be like I need to make money.

Carrie Bradshaw ended up on her own. But you don't have to not if you listen to I Do Part two. Listen to I Do Part two on America's number one podcast network, iHeart Follow I Do Part two, and start listening on the free iHeartRadio app today.

Now we heard you have kids? Oh yeah, what are their ages? And more importantly, did you let them watch Full House?

They are five and one.

Oh come on, that's our demographic.

You know.

I'm in the thick of it to get all the jokes.

My wife is not a big media person, Like, I don't think she knows what this is or why it's funny.

Actually, because I still have some.

People like I'll do an artist talk sometimes and like a woman will show up and my wife will because this one of your full house readers, you know, like I have a small amount of super fans.

You show up to stuff.

But amazing, So our kids allowed to watch a movie like twice a month or something. I don't think she's take any actual TV. Maybe some Sesame Street.

Yeah, they're pretty little, yeah the one yeah, one year old pretty little Sesame Street is right, is amazing.

The one year old's not allowed to look at I think it's like.

No screens or something because it's sustained attention, you know, like, but we try to get her to read books.

You know, we read books to her. Yeah.

Yeah, I'm a big book too. I don't I don't watch a lot of TV, but I read a lot. Good for you, Yeah, yeah, I just I'm most of the time.

It's just because I don't want to wait for video and to wait for someone to talk. I can read faster than that. So I'm like, this is get to the point. But I uh fully approve of your no screen time. They might be the only two children in the world that will be normal in ten.

Years, so well give it time.

I mean, when the five year old becomes a seven, eight, nine year old, I think you should let him or her watchful House. I think it's it's a write a passage as a.

Child, you know, put it in the approved box. It's all we're saying.

Yeah, like I hate watched it once, I can't hate watch it again, and then she'll start her own blog.

That's the other thing is I think maybe in terms of motivation, it's like I said, you would come home from school and it would just be on and I would always watch it as a kid, and I always was like angry at it, you know, and it was a little bit like, you know, like your mom catches you's smoking a cigarette when you're twelve and she makes you smoke a.

Carton of cigarettes.

Like I haven't watched full House since I wrote that last review, Like I.

Got had I flushed it out?

Yeah you watched it? Yeah, I mean that probably happened. After we're done with this show. I'll be like, well that was once one and done one?

And did you watch Solar House? When we did Fuller?

I watched the first season okay, and I wrote about it, and that was one where I.

Was did you did you do a redux of the of the review? I started too, And.

That was one where there were some pop culture blogs that I actually could do it for but I didn't know, like I like passed up a really good one for a not very good one. And then it was like had an editor and it was like I don't want to. I'd rather do this for free than for fifty bucks, you.

Know, right right my blog.

And then it was I don't know, it was like I didn't watch this when I was ten.

I don't know. It wasn't the same, right kind of thing.

Of like, oh, we all remember this and we can point it out and there's a lot of hindsight to Full House, you know, like, oh we know better now than so it just wasn't the same thing. So I only did the first season and I kind of thought even that was it was a stretch.

But you two were amazing, of course.

Anymore, no good answer.

Yeah, I'm just saying, if you want to, if you want to do the other four seasons, you know, monetize that blog.

I'd read it, read it, I would read it.

Yes, I still kind of want to do Family Matters. I've thought of doing it as like a sub stack or something, and then.

Yeah, you should, you should. I think it's people are people love it.

People love it and they and you know, hate watching has never been more popular.

So you can have a lineup like this could be a new career frame. Just do all of t G I s right, be busy for the next ten years.

I mean, I gotta pay a mortgage and stuff. So definitely have to bring something.

Nize, sponsor or something. Yeah, definitely. That's so funny.

Well, this was so much fun to have you on the show like this has been. This is really great. And I hope you know that. We think you're really funny. We love what you wrote. Uh, and we totally agree that this show is ridiculous and uh and it's fun to make fun of but it's got a weird place in people's hearts.

So yeah, yeah, I love it and we love to make fun of it.

Yeah, he can I screen grab this real quickly.

Gosh, yeah, of course it is.

Insane about this, right, please write about this experience?

I should yeah when.

Together, right, Yeah, be like the full circle moment that when they when they I was able to Yeah they don't.

It doesn't hate me anymore?

Yeahymore says we can promote things, can I yes, please?

I was gonna say, what do you what do you what do you have to promote.

Well, I've got a few books I just happened to have right here.

I did a comics biography of Muhammad Li You.

Oh wow.

You can just reach out to me through my website. It's oh yes, very nice dot com.

And then I just.

Finished the second edition. This is the book I actually quit my day job to do. It's called to Teach. It's a teacher's ed book. Clumbia University put it out. We just did a second edition so that you can get this on Amazon or whatever.

My undergred is in elementary education, so I have a mad respect for teachers.

There you go, well, get on it.

That's so great. Yeah, now's the time to go into teaching.

Yeah, yeah, right, it's great. Yeah.

And then I got a Yeah, I have a comics podcast. It's called The Runs, and we talked about runs of comic books and you can get.

That on Apple Podcasts or Spotify or whatever.

So if you want to talk about comic books with guests, which I'm sure.

I'm sure there's a lot of people that would.

Yeah, crossover there, yeah yeah, yeah.

Oh, that's so great for it. One last question that I almost forgot. Your last name is Tanner.

Oh yeah, is that.

Why you chose full House? Like, is there any relation here?

You know? It's funny because I did the whole thing anonymously and then the very last entry, I was like, I'll just tell people who I am if they want to, and a lot of people are like what And I didn't think of it. I have a hyphene last name because my mom's a feminist.

But no, I mean I think it was annoying when I was a kid.

Family.

Yeah, so I think some of the deep seated resentment probably.

How we got to the bottom of it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I believe.

Also on Alf they were the Tanners they were they were because I love Alf Freaking mill Mac taking an outh podcast, heart Beat, I love ALF.

I think I don't know why we haven't brought Alf back. Yeah that small wonder, Come on.

I wonder I watch a reboot of that any day.

Let's do it.

And all right, well, Ryan, thank you so much for coming on the show today.

This was really really fun. As people go.

Check out his podcast, his art, his Dave's bread logo.

Yeah, and go check out check out.

Full House reviewed, because uh he is he's pretty accurate and it's pretty you have a lot of reading to do, folks.

Yes, you're a good sport.

Thanks seriously, Bye bye.

That was so fun.

That was super fun.

It's kind of cool to see the man behind the curtain, you know, like like.

You would write, you know, you write something on the internet ten years ago, and then the person actually reads it, you're like, oh my, oh my god, all right, conscious.

What you wrote? Right, I'm sure it's funny.

I'm just kidding.

He never expected any Full House members that blog, and now we're just.

Like he thought it was. Yeah, Hi, knock knock knock, want to be on our show?

Yes?

Now that was great. I love you know again.

Full House is such a weird part of pop culture that you love it, you hate it, you hate love it, you love hate it.

I don't know, but it's just you.

You can't you can't avoid it in the sort of zeitgeist of the last you know.

Right, he hated the show, but he devoted so much of his time for years to it. It obviously had an impact on him.

So right.

You know, that's sounds like the.

People who leave crappy comments on your Instagram. You're like, but you're here, You're still thank you, you know, This was really fun. Thank you guys so much for listening to this really fun minisode. If you want to find us on Instagram, you can check us out at how Red podcast or send us an email at how rud tan Rito's at gmail dot com. Uh, you check out our merch store, how Rude merch dot com and.

Uh and that's it. That's it. So remember you, guys.

The world is small, but the house is full of substack blogs about full house, all of them. Just there's so many fuller full I love written by substacks. That's like a very healthy place to be.

So okay, well it depends on what substack you're reading. The ones I read are great, right this one? Go read this one? Yeah, okay, substacks b