S2 E04: People Don't Change

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Good morning, John. Are we being civil now? I was always civil to you. You're the one who shut me out. I'm not going to argue with you every time I come down here. It doesn't need to be down here. I can go with you anywhere in the hospital. You'd think that after months of stalking me while you're alive, you'd be kind of sick of it now that you're a ghost. I'm a-

I'm not stalking you. I am interested in what you're doing. Oh. Well, don't be. You can move on. I don't want to move on. Do you know how much I can see around here? How much I can listen into? Ah, it must be a dream come true for you. Let's just say I'm making the most out of the situation. Well, feel free to eavesdrop on someone else. I have work to do.

Trust me. People around here know how much work you have to do. It's like no one ever stops talking about you. I don't care. You and your crazy closing rate. It's slightly above average. You and Amelia. There's nothing to talk about there. If you say so, you can tell me, Doc, for real this time. I literally can't tell... Anyone else? I think you just like to talk. Hey. Since when do you knock? You, uh, alright? What do you mean? He's fine. After the other day.

Is there any update on the investigation into Jimmy Hooper? It's still ongoing. And I'm still doing the same. Look, I'm trying to be considerate of, well, everything. Why? What kind of a question is that? Nope. No. I just... I get how this can be hard to deal with, and... What the hell is happening right now? You know what? Never mind. I've got a case for you.

So give me the case file. It's a priority case. Weren't they all? It's a 15-year-old girl. Looks like a suicide. Ah, that's why she's acting so odd. If it was a suicide, why do you need me? Because the family asked for an autopsy. And we take autopsy requests from grieving families now? Is that a thing? We do, and their last name is Vanderbilt. So they want to know what type of pill she used to sue someone or something? What? No. They don't believe it was a suicide. Interesting.

You have my attention? I should have your attention the entire damn time. Case file, please. Here, quit being a little bitch. Wow! Aw, Crowley. I thought you were trying to be nice to me today. Yeah, well, you ruined it. Go figure. I brought her body down with me, so get to work. Best of luck with the Jimmy Hooper investigation. We'll talk later. Yeah. Since when do you stand up to Sheriff Fran? I miss so much being stuck here. Since she threatened to shoot me yesterday. Been there. Done that.

You seem to be in an awfully good mood for someone who hates being dead. I'm excited for another ghost. Why? Because I need to know I'm not the only one who feels like this. You're starting to feel sick. Yeah, like... Like I'm not really here anymore. How did you know? Past experience. I feel like I'm losing my mind. It's implying you've had it in the first place. Not funny! Or was it? Aha! Okay then. Alright.

Deceased is Faye Vanderbilt, 15 years of age, 4 foot 9 inches tall, approximately 90 pounds. Blood type, A positive. I hate this part. I would imagine it also sucks for her, but I'm sorry to hear that it upsets you too. I didn't mean it like that. No. Please explain it to me instead of allowing me to do my work. You do your thing, Doc, and I'll just watch. Thank you. The deceased shows no signs of external injuries.

Checking with a black light. I'm not finding anything standing out. Hmm. Nothing. We'll be doing a stomach dissection to determine the substance used. You're still recording everything, huh? I thought you were going to be quiet. It goes against my nature. I bet. Faye, are you here? Faye? It's all right. You're not alone. You can come talk to us. All right, I'll get started then.

Doesn't bother you? Why would it? That's fair. Cutting someone with a scalpel does come naturally to you. The deceased's esophagus appears to be burned. That may be a byproduct of vomiting, or it could have been the effect of something in excess, such as pills. You keep saying that word. Deceased. Because she is deceased. The last case.

With Clay? You called them victim. Clay was a victim. They were murdered. And this girl was a victim of suicide. It's not the same as having your life taken away from you. Suicide was a choice. Is it? You sound like someone who's never dealt with those thoughts. You don't know a damn thing about me. I wasn't implying that she wasn't the victim of something terrible.

I don't know what drove her to this. I'm just saying I would prefer if no one was ever killed. I just can't condone someone ending their own life. I can hear you guys, you know. Oh? Oh. I'm... I didn't see you there. It's fine. Faye, do you understand what's going on? I'm guessing that since my body is on that table, and you're all talking like I'm dead, that I am actually dead. You're correct. Are you both dead too? I am.

I am not. But you can see me. And him? Yeah, I can. I don't know how to explain it, but I'm here to help you. Help me with what? Well, to... Make sense of what happened and how to deal with this. Is that what you do? Yes, of course. Now, shut up, Curtis. You guys are weird. What do you mean, figure out what happened? Like, uh, what led to... I swallowed a bottle of pills. And you weren't poisoned or forced to take them or...

No, of course not. Why? Your parents seem to think someone killed you. Of course they do. Curtis, I don't want to overstep, but... Did you try to tell them how you were feeling before? Curtis! It's okay. Yeah, I did. My parents...

I'm sure you saw my last name on that chart of yours. I did. Yeah, well, we're, uh... We were, like, the furthest removed cousins. One of the last that actually still lived here. The rest moved away, but no, not my parents. They loved the prestige of the Vanderbilt name that came with living here. And even though we weren't rich or anything,

It was always about appearances. Let me guess. They didn't want to hear about your problems. You're leading her. He's right, though. They never listen to me. They just sent me to our family counselor. And it didn't help? I wouldn't be here if it did. So, why do your parents think that someone killed you? I'm sure they didn't want to believe that their precious family had any problems. That seems like such a reach, even for people in denial. That's my parents for you.

They never wanted to admit anything was wrong. Not with money, not with me. Nothing. It's amazing how much our parents can influence our lives. Or deaths, huh?

Did you kill yourself too? No. Actually, the good doc here. Curtis. I didn't kill myself, but I did try before. Really? Yeah. Years ago, my parents screwed me up too. But in a different way. I was safe haven surrendered at Springfield General. Here? Yeah. I was only a few months old, so I don't remember it, obviously. But it was just the beginning of feeling like I never fit in. I get that. Um, um...

Not to cut this short, but I'm going to continue the autopsy. You may want to look away. It's fine. Continuing past the esophagus, I see a bit more of the burn. Now into the intestines. What made you do it? Curtis. Come on. It's a fair question. You don't need to answer that, Faye. It's okay. Is it because it isn't relevant to the case?

What? You did this last time. You only ask questions if they have an impact on the case itself. Am I not supposed to solve cases now? Yes, that's absolutely what I'm suggesting. Guys... Then what are you suggesting? I'm suggesting you're good at pretending like you care. But when it comes down to it, it's only about solving the case. You don't care about the actual people behind the case file. That's not true.

Guys! Stop bickering. Sorry. He's projecting. Do you really want to know? What's your name? It's Curtis. And yes, I do. And you don't? Of course I do. Of course you do. I am sorry that you're dead. Why? Jeez. From you two? No, I mean, why are you sorry that I killed myself? You said earlier that it was a choice. And you're right. It was a choice. And it's a choice I stick by. There's no reason to be sad.

I'm moving down to examine the contents of the victim's stomach. Ready to launch your business? Get started with the commerce platform made for entrepreneurs. Shopify is specially designed to help you start, run, and grow your business with easy, customizable themes that let you build your brand. Marketing tools that get your products out there. Integrated shipping solutions.

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Do you feel better? After you killed yourself, I mean. I, uh... I don't know how to answer that. I mean, I'm not regretting it or anything. I'm glad I did it. It's just... I don't feel relieved or different at all. Am I supposed to? I have no idea. I don't think so. I don't think being dead is... supposed to be this freeing thing. At least not in this state. What do you mean? There is a calm that I feel from not having a physical body.

You get rid of the agitations and physical pain, but you're still you. Do you still feel like yourself? Yes. Of course. Why? And you still think like you used to while you were alive, right? Yeah. I did too. At least at first. And even though we're dead, we're still the same people. I don't think this, uh, this in-between being is supposed to change that. But it does change. And it changes quickly. What do you mean? The longer you're here as a ghost.

The worse it becomes. At first, it's a blessing to no longer be able to feel. No pain, no hunger. And then you start to realize you can't feel anything. No more touch, no more smell. All we have is sight. And we can watch the living as they get to feel. It's miserable. Is there... There is. You're not trapped here. So I can just choose to move on at any time? From my experience, yes. All right. Cool. See ya. Wait! What now?

Faye, you don't know what's after this. Curtis, just let her go. No, let me speak. You just said that being a ghost is terrible. I have no reason to stick around. Being a ghost is... A step in between. I still have my emotions and my cognitive functions. That's all that I have right now. What if there really is nothing when we move on? Or what if there's happiness?

What if there's peace? What little we have left could be gone! Nothingness? That doesn't sound so bad. You don't know! Curtis, is that what you're afraid of?

Hey there, Doc. Got anything for me? Flashbacks. Crowley. Who is she? Sheriff Fran. She brought you in here. Kenji? Sea ghosts? No. No, you don't have anything for me? This could get tricky. No, I mean, I'm analyzing the contents of the stomach, and from what I can tell, it does look like a suicide. But I'll need a few hours to sift through and test the contents. Give me a percentage. Suicide to murder. Faye, don't... don't leave yet. Can I get a tour of the hospital? Of course. And we can talk.

Wait. Goddammit. See? This is exactly why I can't deal with you. You're even more moody than you used to be since the incident.

I wasn't even... I talked to Dr. Kin this morning before coming down here. Why? Because I don't think you should be cleared to work. What the fuck? Speak of the devil. What is this? I'm working. So this is where the magic happens, huh? Nothing magic about it. I told you he was testy today. I don't have time for some inquest or intervention.

It's not an intervention, Jonathan. I just wanted to chat with the both of you. And you thought that doing it down here would, what, make me uncomfortable and relive some of my trauma? I see your psychology rotation knowledge did stick with you a bit. But no, I'm not here to shock you into dealing with your suffering. Although I do think you need to. I'm here because I want to see how you were dealing with your work.

Badly. Just because we argue doesn't mean I can't do my job. We were getting along at least a little bit the other day. Do you mind if I use this table to set up my recorder? Don't bother. Spacer here records everything already. Oh, do you? Look at that. I've never seen him without it. Must be some kind of doctor thing. Are we having a full therapy session right now?

I'm trying to do my job. Just recording for reference later. Reference for what? How would you say your day has been? Busy. Why? That's good to hear. since you skipped your appointment this morning. I had a case. I went to grab you out of Kim's office to give you the case file, but you were already down here. I must have known a case was coming in then.

Or I was updating old files. These sessions are mandatory, Jonathan. John. Fran mentioned to me earlier that you were hostile towards her yesterday. What triggered you? Triggered me? Nothing triggered me. You seem pretty triggered right now. We argue, Crowley. You bark at me all the time and I annoy you. Dr. Kim here said I needed to stop keeping my frustrations inside, so it's what I'm doing. I'm your boss, you little... She's right, Jonathan.

And as much as I'm glad you're at least taking my recommendations to heart, you and I both know this was not what I meant. Fine. She was sidelining me again. You were disobeying orders in the field. This isn't a war zone. I was helping you, and you're just mad that I stood up for myself for once. I was trying to keep you safe. This isn't the time or place for a yelling match.

In fact, there is probably never a time or place for something like that. Do you two do this often? Yeah. No. Fine, but that's not healthy for either of you. Let's try to identify the root of the frustration between you two. Fran, you go first. Am I allowed to, I don't know, work during this? Because I've got my hands full. Literally.

That's why I came down here instead of asking you to come see me. I hope you see how absurd this whole thing is. Next time, you're free to come to your scheduled appointment. Fran? Why does Spacer annoy me? Not in so many words, but yes. Oh, I can tell you exactly why. She doesn't want my help.

I'm always overstepping and trying to run the case, and she thinks that I think that I know everything. It only took me yelling that at you 20 times before you got it. Jonathan, do you have a response to Fran's frustrations? Preferably in a normal, even tone. No, I don't. And then he just shuts up after saying whatever he wants. The stomach contents appear to be normal, by the way.

I'll run a toxicology report to ensure there are no signs of poison, but I'm 99% sure it's suicide. Why are you trying to deflect? I am just trying to do this while you both are stringing me out to dry. That's an interesting choice of wording. Mind if I explain why he's so angry? I don't think that's a good idea. He's mad he has to do things he doesn't want to. And take orders from someone he doesn't want to listen to. I'm mad because you don't trust me. You never have.

You didn't when I was scared about Curtis, and look what happened. Now you don't trust me to do my job or even be alone down here. You put me on a damn watch list with them as my babysitter. I'm still under investigation into a man who attacked me. I am not the bad guy here, Crowley. But you seem to think that I am. Ren...

If you've got a few minutes, do you mind if we talk separately? I had hoped we'd be able to do this together, but it seems like that's not going to be an option. Fine. I'm going for a smoke. Jonathan. Was all of this just to push me into exploding? I'm glad you were assigned to me. This is important for you. Screw you. Now, now.

Let's not forget that you need me, Jonathan. You need me to clear you for work. And telling me off isn't going to help that, now is it? Oh. And Jonathan. It's John. I'd like a copy of your case file's audio logs. What? Just to listen through. If we're going to get to the root of your anger... I think we should hear how you behave on other cases. Shit. Oh, shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit.

How I Died is an audio media original production created and written by Vince Dijani, directed and edited by Chroma Secura, with sound design and mixing by Eric Howell. The How I Died theme song was created by Silent Mike. Starring me as John Spacer. Shana Waring as Sheriff Crowley, David Dixon as Curtis, Luis Bermudez as Eric Mendez, Vin Vox as Dr. Kim, and Caitlin Roberts as Amelia. This episode guest starred Chroma Secura as Faye Vanderbilt.

Thanks so much for listening and until next episode, try not to die. I'm here to tell you about Good Morning Night Vale. Welcome to Night Vale's official recap show and unofficial best friend food podcast. Join me, Meg Bashwinner, and fellow Tri hosts, Hal Lublin and Symphony Sanders, as we dissect all of the cool, squishy, and slimy bits of every episode of Welcome to Night Vale.

Come for the insightful and hilarious commentary, and stay for all of the weird and wild behind-the-scenes stories. Good morning, Night Vale, with new episodes every other Thursday. Get it wherever you get your podcasts. Yes, even there. Alright girls, this is the place. We'll get everything loaded over to the boat and we'll lock up the truck. Don't leave anything behind. Wait, is that it? That's where we're going?

Yeah, that's it. Seal Skin Rock. Wow. Return to the mysteries in Don't Mind, Seal Skin Rock. Subscribe now to catch the premiere, and we'll see you on The Rock.