On this episode, relaxed erections versus clenching erections, this is the holistic alpha male optimization podcast where we help you unleash your true power as a man. Hey guys, welcome back to the show. I'm Stephen Mathis. Thank you for being part of this tribe, this growing tribe of men who are prioritizing sexual health, recognizing the impact that sexuality has in our lives.
You're only listening to this episode based on the title, if that is a priority, if it's something that matters to you. So good on you. Thanks for being here. Let's talk about relaxed erections versus clenching erections. By default, we in essence have clenching erections when we grow up as we start to have erections, a couple of things are true. 1 is that when we get an erection, typically the default response is to kind of squeeze that root muscle. It is to clench in response to
that erection. And then the other part of it is that again, kind of our default setting is to clench and squeeze when we are trying to get an erection early on in your edging practice, early on in having sex or before you're trying to have sex, right? That is kind of the default response. However, like with a lot of being human, the default response is actually often not
the one that helps us thrive. Same thing is true here, the one that helps us thrive in our sexuality, the one that helps us thrive in terms of our erection quality, in terms of our control. We'll talk a little bit more about both of those in a second is in fact practicing relaxed erections. Now, it will not happen overnight and it's not a sort of yes or no this the the switch is flipped One Direction or the other.
What this is, is gradually building our ability to both get and maintain an erection with a relaxed root muscle in a relaxed state, as well as to maintain that erection in a relaxed state no matter what arousal level you're at. Now, the different pieces of that may be in place for you to some degree, and others not so much, right?
So you may have no problem, for example, getting an erection while you stay relaxed, but then as you start to get really aroused, you do have a challenge staying relaxed, right? So what I would encourage you to do is as a general principle, as often as possible, we want to practice getting and having erections with a relaxed root muscle. Again, it's not going to happen overnight. A good place to to pay attention to this and to start doing this is when you're in your edging practice.
When you begin your edging practice, it is very tempting for a lot of guys and it's it's tempting for me at times still and certainly more so in the past. It is tempting to get into that squeezing kind of action right away as you begin your edging practice.
And the mere act of being patient and patience is key because if you're going to be patient in the beginning, if you're going to stay relaxed and you're not going to squeeze that root muscle at all, it may take you longer to get erect. It may take you significantly longer. In fact, you may have to work with it over a course of days or weeks to kind of gradually start incorporating that more and
more. However, when you do and when you practice not only getting an erection, staying relaxed in your root muscle, but also keeping that erection, which again is its own thing to practice. As you practice both of those things, two things are going to happen. One is you're going to have better erections more easily because part of what we're doing here is, is programming our body for how it's going to achieve and maintain an erection, right? There's some mind body
connection stuff going on there. There's also an effect of actually strengthening your erections over time because when you can maintain an erect state, when you're relaxed, it is actually strengthening your erection in a very interesting way. So when you practice this more and more, two things are going to happen. One is you're going to get better erections more easily.
I promise you, you will find this it's kind of counterintuitive and I absolutely talk about and yes, it is very important to have a strong root muscle to practice your Kegel squeezes to practice drawing that energy up with with squeezes and draws in a very intentional way. When you're in your edging practice when you're having sex,
yes, that is very important. However, this issue of actually maintaining a relaxed state with an erection, getting an erection and at various arousal levels is one of the best things you could possibly focus on across the different types of you know, whether it's edging or it's having sex across the different parts of that those experiences. It is one of the best things you can focus on. So it will improve your
erections. And then the other thing is it will improve your control absolutely massively. This is the number one thing you could do as a general principle if you would like to improve your control and your stamina. The general principle to practice is getting maintaining an erection with a relaxed root muscle, including at any sort of arousal level. And wherever you're at with that, you just kind of start to take the next step, right?
So if for example, let's say if you go to have an edging practice today and if you stay completely relaxed, you basically can't get an erection at all. OK, do that for a couple minutes. Don't get upset about it. Be patient, practice it a little bit and then maybe transition into your normal thing. And then you come back tomorrow and you practice it again. You practice it again, you're going to start to find that you can start to get an erection with a relaxed root muscle.
And this is something have you had the experience where once you kind of get going, your erection is OK, but it doesn't come as easily and quickly as you would like. For example, maybe you're making out with your partner and you would love to like get a hard erection at that point when you're aroused, but it actually takes some stimulation, etcetera, to really get that erection.
This process of practicing getting an erection and you're edging practices, of course, really the the primary place to practice this, this this process of practicing getting an erection while you stay relaxed, it will make a big difference in how easily you get erections in those kind of situations. So I hope this makes sense. As always, I hope you find value in the show and I appreciate you being here. If you find value in the show, you know what you can do.
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