Have you never seen a whole chicken. I don't like to look at naked chickens. They are very naked, all right, there's something about I really don't even like seeing chicken get cooked because it looks too That's the type of chicken that will make me a vegan, because yes, it looks like people, and it looks so naked what it's about to get cooked that I'm like, this is a sin. Hey, everybody, welcome to hold up the Big Show about Little Things. It's where your two co hosts, me Josh Johnson right
for the Daily Show, joined by today's episode. It's gonna take us to a place that y'all may have never heard us get. You know, you've heard us go back and forth, you know our dynamic. But I don't think you really ready for what's gonna happen today, because today some lines were we're crossed, all right? Who you? Who you? Oh God? You I didn't do anything. I didn't do anything. You act like I can't hear you. Like you don't have a mic, and I have headphones. I can hear
you where you go? Oh God, under your breath, you know, I gotta do it over my breath today's episode is about wings. Yes, okay, but but there's there's a place that we differ, where we divide, where we break apart. There's a schism between your two favorites, and uh the schism is Boneless versus bone In. And I want the people to take a moment to not only guess who picked what, but decide for themselves what they want to do.
That A person who gave us this was a comment from the YouTube's Libra Girl suggested this and I when I heard it, I was like, Oh, that's a fun thing. And Josh suited up ready for war. You would think that bone Thugs a Harmony was playing in the background, just World War just all of creeping on the come up and each ninety nine playing in the background. He is not happy with me because play of me was like,
who guessed what? Josh Johnson? Since you are so amped up and retty to go head to head, toe to toe, navel to navel, get they ready forgets that part? Uh huh yeah, yeah, yeah, tell the people what did you pick? I'm bone in play whistles, boioe whistles. I'm boning all day, all the way. Why are you talking so hard? Am I talking so hard. You acting like I came acting. Oh sorry, all right, all right, all right, I'm acting. Okay, you know what it was like. Wait, this is the
most aggressive I've ever seen. You get a by the topic. Yeah, because I like juicy flavors. Okay, I think that you should. You should have to you should have to put in a little work to get your deliciousness. I don't like the audacity of the boneless wing. You have to do work to take bones out of something. Yeah, yeah, but that's not the work. I don't you. You show up to get these boneless wings, okay, and when you show up and you get the boneless wings, you act like
that's natural. Okay, it's not. It's not right. I don't understand why yourself upset. It's just a chicken nugget. Do you hate chicken nuggets? Stuff? I'm not a huge fan of chicken nuggets. You don't like the chicken nuggs? You don't like the chicken nugs? No, no, no, no, you don't like the chicken legs? No, no, no, Why don't you like the chicken neg It's too processed. It's like, it's just I don't know. Okay, let me ask you
a question. Yeah, where you go to the Chinese with restaurants that don't have commercials Okay, do you enjoy a sessame with chicken, a general sal chicken? I used to eat a general sal, and I used to eat a tiny spicy okay. But when the day came while I was like, oh, it's just nuggets with sauce, I think I was done. So then when you get to the Chinese restaurant, very little, I don't. I don't go often. Sometimes I'll get some like sesame noodle dish or something,
but yeah, I don't. I don't go that often. You Chinese, I eat sometimes? Yeah, I used to eat it more. Yeah, yeah, but now now not not often? Do you eat? What do you mean what do I eat? You know? I had this thought the other day, like what did I eat for dinner last month? Like you know you eat? You eat? You know you eat? Yeah, you eat and you forget. Yeah. I'm not a huge fan of chicken tenders, okay, because they're always like the white breast meat. I don't
like white meat chicken okay my word. I like white meat chicken. Man are fine, but it's when I order, like when I buy chicken, I'm buying thighs or leg quarters. But I really don't even enjoy a drumstick really, not all the time. Not really, I don't enjoy a breast at all. Breast is so big. I'm like, I don't And it's because the breast is dry, you don't enjoy it, and because it's just so big sometimes, like you remember when the Church of Chicken As a kid, You're like,
why who gave me all of this? Sure? But let's say, because I think about this a lot with food, especially with just how like an American relationship to food. If you were to go to Italy, okay, and if you were to get chicken that was from a farm, so not like not the farm raised chicken here, that's just being fed grain and its legs never touched the ground and all that stuff like that I've seen. Yeah, it's
stopped one of my friends from eating chicken ever. Again. Yeah, it's like if you were able to get chicken from a reasonable ethical farm, you know, like the best chicken that you could and it was cooked for you specifically as a whole chicken, do you think you still wouldn't like the white meat? Or is it because the white meat is I don't really like the texture of white meat. Oh okay, So even if it's juicy, even if it's cooked right, you're still like, nah, this isn't for me.
They can cook it in Italy, they can cook it in Mexico. They could cook it, you know, on a house with a mouse. It's just I'm not yes, okay, yeah, I understood way before we got to the mouse. But yeah, I'm just not a fan of Yeah, because like when my mom would buy a whole chicken, is I would like, I would take the lead quarter and then her and my brother would eat the rest of the chicken. What I'm so puzzled by is how much of the chicken
you don't like. This is my thing with boning chicken is that I am a person who have seen wings that weren't done like a comic just got Like the other night we were out at a club, ordered some wings. Yeah, and it was so bloody. Oh what it was so bloody. He got past you know, you could your first bart of chicken and when he started getting down to the bone, it was blood. You knew where we was at getting
these wings and they were blood. I can tell you I have never gone to an establishment that is frequented by black people. I've never been in an American Delhi and seen blood on a wing. M I've never seen anywhere the people black people frequent on a regular basis. I've never gotten any Chinese restaurant we were order wings from. I've never been to a wit and seen blood. Establishments that cater to white people plenty of time, plenty of times. I don't know. I don't have the people in the
back of trying to kill these white folks. That's what you're describing is so insane. What you're describing is like I can't even I really don't want to think about you never seen like the bloody of the bone is bloody on wings? No, no, no, I've seen it once before on a wing that my grandma was throwing out as she should have. I've seen undercook's um undercook boneless wings before, but it was just cold. It wasn't blood.
You know, I've never seen an undercook by what und Okay, So one of my friends this this is like, this goes hand in hand. One of the nastiest weeks that I had in New York was luckily nothing that I ate but I was out here with people getting their food. And you know, this is like early days in New York. So I I don't know where to go, and neither do my friends, right, so we're just trying places to try them and everything. Yeah, I happened to be full,
So I don't know. Maybe I got something from this place. I don't think I did. And it was it was down the road for me, and I was with a friend, uh who we both know, and she she ordered her food and when we got home, U, I love this she was eating and it was pretty good. She was like, oh, this is not half bad, Like maybe I'll go there. And as she's like, maybe I'll make that a regular place. She went to grab a napkin to wipe her fingers
and there was blood all her napkin. What yes, so somebody no, no, no, no, she she was giving some napkins in the bag. The napkins had blood on them. Yeah. Yeah, so she was giving used napkins. Yeah, either used napkins or the person that gave her the napkins was stabbed freshly. Oh my god, I just died. I just died. I just died. Did you know? I just died? And she as.
She was like, you know, you know those things that happened in life that were vert you back to being a kid where where you're like, is this what I think it is? Like? I had somebody invite me to a barbecue, had served me chicken that I could tell was undercooked as soon as I bit in, and then they were so embarrassed that after I left, they pretended
to not know me. I bit into the chicken, they saw they saw my eyes, and then I pulled my mouth back off the chicken with the bite marks in it, and it was like it was still kind of pink as the meat and he had been cooking it. He had been cooking it for a while. And the three of us just sat there in silence, and then I ate some more of the sides, and then I thanked them for me, and then then I left right and then sure enough, a couple what was it a couple
of months later? I went to invite them to a show because in my head, we're friends, right, and so so something change. Well, No, when I invited them to the show, they were like, who is this? And I was like, oh, it's Josh from you know, no, from work, And they were like, oh, I don't know who this is, no, Joshua, Yeah, Josh shut up. Yeah, they like true, I worked and I worked with them for like at least two months. That's why I got invited to the barbecue, because we
worked together. No. I said all that to say that, in spite of my near death, I still prefer bone in the flavor. I would never eat in somebody else's house ever. Again, the flavor, the juiciness. Right, you almost died, all right, the way you know how satisfying it is to get meat off the bone. Yeah, it's good. Wow, I'm not saying it's not good. I know you weren't
saying it what good? But just the you really you're really meeting me at a five right now, because it's like you want me to be like, I'm like, you know, I mean yeah, I mean I'm an omnivore, Josh, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, you know your girl is an omnivore. And I mean I understand what you're going for, you know what I mean? But what's so great about boneless? I like boneless one because I'm never
going to run into meets trying to kill me. That well, it's I can say, there's been more instances where I have had bone in meat that was undercooked. Because the thing is, it's like I've never won. There's no like blood really in a boneless wing, right, yeah, yeah, it's a nugget, right, And I've never had I've never had That's not true. I've seen it where I had like some little cartilage or something left in it, but I've never flat out had a completely underdone This is bleeding
boneless wing. Also, sometimes I don't want to go through all of that pulling off of bone, and you know, sometimes you just want to just eat. You know, sometimes the bones places and then it's like, you know, we had cats, so you know animals like cats and dogs can't have chicken back Yeah, cooked bones. Yeah, well, especially chicken bones because they're hollow, because bird bones are hollow. Yeah, and a splinter and they'll break apart. They'll break apart
and like hurt them. So if you're out here giving anim almost chicken bones, please stop. Yeah you're gonna take You're gonna take your dogs to urgent care. Uh. Just also if you have and also if you have a parent, there's so many times to tell our parents, hey, don't do that don't give that dog a chicken you know whatever. Yeah, nah,
it'll be okay. I don't know what we can tell them, because you'll tell them, hey, you can't do that, uh, and go all this out right, it's all right, And now we at the fucking dog emergency room because you wouldn't listen to no damn body. And now the chicken boning becomes trappneling this damn dog. Mhm, why are you telling me? That's my favorite? Yeah? I told you multiple times. Yeah. Also, life isn't a cartoon. You cannot just be giving your pets these these bones just because you saw it on
Tom and Jerry. Yeah. Like a lot of times I feel like, especially like certain you know, groups of people will be like, oh, it's a dog who cares, and it's like they are animals. They have feelings, they can get hurt, like you know, animals get cancer like we have to. Yeah, I don't know. Also, also they have very expressive faces, like if you get a dog a bone and it makes it sick, it's gonna look at you like what did you do to me? What did
you do to me? Like you've ever liot a cat smell like a pickle or had like a dog like they'll go. If something steaks, they go. Yeah, like when something steaky to an animal, they'll get like they'll go or you know, they'll let you know it's not okay. But I think for me, the boneless wings, I've never had it where it was underdone. I like that they're just little chicken nut because I think they're cute. I think when they came out, you know, at first, I
was like, this a bullshit. Why are you taking the bones out of wings? Wings? Need you know, wings need a bonus? How you know their wings? Also? I did not know. Is it a regional thing? So you know how there's like the drum stick in the flat right? Yeah? Yeah, I thought everywhere called them flats. Yeah. I'm trying to remember what they called them when I was growing up,
because here's the thing. What am I missing here? There's the flat, there's the drumstick, and then and then there's the wing that is an actual like is the wing like a real wing? Because a wing and a flat or the wing? Listen, so this is the anatomy. Look at my luscious, voluptuous arms. Okay, are not gonna make me feel self conscious at all and if you put a YouTube comment about my arms, fuck you and your family. So this is the way. This is the wing right yeah, yeah,
so just like a person's arm. Okay, yeah, so you see because like whens a kid, I used to sell the whole wings. So this part is a drumstick part because you know you have one bone in your arm, Oh, drumstick part. Then you know I have two bones right here? Yeah, this is the flat. Yeah. And then you know a little tip right there that you're I'm gonna break open and get the tying and beat the meat out. Okay, this is a little tip. When you get wings or a store, they throw this part away and then they
separate all of these joints. Oh wow, so this is that makes that makes sense? Yeah, I had the order wrong in my head because in my head I thought it was flat and the little you know, yeah, what what is? Yeah? Have you never seen a whole chicken? I don't like to look at it. Naked chickens. They are very naked, all right. There's something about I really don't even like see a chicken get cooked because it looks too That's the type of chicken that will make
me a vegan. Because yes, it looks like people, and it looks so naked when it's about to get cooked that I'm like, this is a sin because you can feel the skin, yes, yes, Whereas like with beef, I'm like, I that's a slab of meat. You know, Pork, I'm like, Okay, chicken in the body, Yeah, chicken will make you feel like a cannibal, like the body's like a twenty pound turkey. Yeah, that's still upsetting. But it doesn't hit me the same way a chicken dog because I think it's little. You
ever seen a cornish hen? Yes, yes, so tiny. Oh remember when we wear a harrot's and it had like pigeons and fucking ducks and rabbits and shit. I didn't like that. I don't like that at all. Like I if you had already hooked it, I'd be really interested if it was if it was already all like seasoned, then laying out there, I'd be like, oh, I've never tried pheasant. But then when it's just raw, I'm like,
oh you mean dirt bird man? That that rabbit the rabbit. Yeah, because they don't even put them in a little they're just laid out, just laid out just all just looking fast. Let me throw this out there real quick. Um, and this this right here, this this, this, this next little part. This for the fellas, all right, this for this for my men out here, this for the boys, for the bros. Okay, all right, let me start all right, look the reason as men. Okay, then we gotta keep it bone in. Okay,
start all right, lost all the base start again. No no no, no, no, no no no no no. Hold on all right, hold hold on, hold on. Okay, see this, fellas, this is what they're gonna try to do to you,
all right. So look look, my my, my boys, all right, we gotta keep it bone in because when you're when you're building, and my and my men know what I'm talking about when I talk about this, when you're building and you're eating your wings and you need another bowl, you need an empty bowl that you put the bones in. And then when you're done with your meal, you see all the bones that you dropped. All right, that's because you're a warrior. Okay, that's it's not let's wait wait
wait wait wait wait wait wait. That's because you're a warrior. Okay, that's why all those bones that that's that carnage that you laid down. Okay, your forefathers you Okay, let's say what about niggas that have five fathers? Josh, wow wow, No, don't listen to the noise all right, all right, my men out here, don't listen to the noise like that. Okay, where you got forefathers, five fathers or just stepfathers, all right,
it doesn't matter. Okay. As men, when you lay out a bowl of bone and you did all that damage, you look back at that damage and you say, you say, damn, damn, I really did that. I pulled all that meat off that bone. I'm gonna do that in life. I'm gonna go get I'm gonna go get the meat off the bones in life, okay, Because life got a lot of meat everywhere. You gotta pull it from the bone yourself. Okay. And then, as men, you gotta carry your bones like trophies. Okay,
As men, you need to carry your bones like trophies. Now, the men are gonna hear what I'm saying, know what i'm saying, and feel what I'm saying. All right. If you don't feel me right now, you're a hater, okay, or maybe a woman. You you're you're a hater or maybe a woman, and it's important that my men, in my manno's feel Okay, hear what I'm saying. Collect those bones and when you when you dump them in the trash. I mean, if I were you, I wouldn't even dump
in the trash. I would carry the bones around with me and let people know, Hey, this is what I do. Don't mess with me, all right, because if you keep it boneless, all right, if you keep it, if you keep it the way of the world, the way the world's trying to make you, there won't be any proof that you lay waste, that you got bones, that you're a man. Okay, so remember that. Man, all right. I know this message didn't reach everybody, but it wasn't for everybody, Okay, okay,
all right. I love your dedication to this fucking nonsense. I love that you have just made it your life's goal to be this fucking person. I don't even know what you're talking about. Excuse me, I don't even know. I don't even know what you're describing right now, all right, all I can be is one hundred percent authentic all times,
all days, all weeks, months, and years. Okay, this is how I'm making it laugh, you know, because because sometimes you know, you don't even want your manhood to come out like that because people won't be ready, you know. And it's it's the bone in that really pulls that out of men. You know that Real men men like the bone. Real men keep that bone in. Okay. I was trying to get to it before you did, damn it. So real men, Yeah, real men keep that bone in. Okay, okay, okay,
m hmm. Wow. I hope I really hope that we have helped on this journey for you know, because so many men have it. It's so hard right now. Thank you, Thank you for being an ally after all the Nazi's men have put me through. I wish I fucking would be an ally. Thank thank you for the work that you do. You know what I'm saying, I just you know what. I love it when a man can just
be a fucking man. Yeah, there we go. See, get out here, take out the trash, you heard it, pay all the bills speak, you know, and really just go out there. Hunt, Go out there and hunt. Go ahead and get the sch moneys. Go out there, you get the schmoneys, right, and then you come back and leave me the hell alone and eat all your wings, all right. If she put twenty in front of you, then eat twenty. She puts two in front of you, eat two. I'm alright,
I put out there because I'm cooking whole wings, baby boy. Okay, I'm not out here Nickel and Diamond. You. Yeah, she's not just putting out flats. She's not just putting out drumsticks. She's not just putting out the little cue. I'm giving you the whole, when whole, the whole as a chicken intended right out here, cocka dooing, Okay, all up in
your plate, all right. So men, when I cook this food, that means that you you are responsible for washing all of these dishes, taking out the trash afterwards, and then dicking me down. And that, fellas is what you should be doing if you out here saying that you're a true man. Okay, youd never have to ask you to take the trash out, because you know what your motherfucking job is. You know you're supposed to, you know, bring home the money, okay, bring home the moneys, and don't
ask me shit. Yeah, I just think bone in is better I think it has more flavor, and I think that I think I think that you get with grizzle, with the fat that's actually on the chicken. I think it can just go to more interesting places in your palette because I can say I don't know what part of the chicken boneless wings come from. Yeah, but I
gets all parts. But it's parts because it's not because like when you're the Chinese breastaurant, you get like your sesames, your general size, your orange chickens, and gott kt kt kt kt. When you get all of those things, they're still an actual cut of meat. M right, Yeah, it' still an actual cut of meat. I just don't know what part of the body. I hate to break it to you, but boneless wings mhm, this breast meat, is it? Yeah? Yeah, it's breast meat. Why do the taste so much better?
I don't know, probably just less of it, more attention, more flavor, more sauce, more bonless wings. Me, I mean it looks like it. It looks like if you're getting good quality, um, good quality boneless wings, it looks like it's breast meat. Because I thought it was processed to the point of being from all different parts. Of the chicken. No, bonus wings aren't processed like that. You know that they are m hmm chicken. Yeah, it's slices of breast meat real, yeah, yeah,
huh m hmmm. I mean, who knows. There there's probably some I'm boneless out there that's made of thigh. But it makes sense because to your point, the breast is so big and there's so much meat to go around. It's probably the only part of the chicken that you could pull that much meat from and then bread it and then have a whole piece of something. Do you know what I mean? Yes, Because if they tried to do boneless wings off of drums, like off of drumsticks,
they'd be so tiny, they would be tiny. So I guess that'll be the place where you could get the most week because I thought maybe they were like the fun because I think sometimes I go to Chrain's restaurant,
I think sometimes that's thimy. I think you might be right, because there are a lot of people when I looked it up who were asking if boneless wings are breast or thigh, and so maybe there are some out there that are thigh, but it seems like a lot of it is breast, which would make sense because the times that I've had boneless wings and I was like, and they were a bit bigger, I would just bite half instead of trying to gob up the whole thing in one.
And when I'm biting that half, when I pull away, it does look like white meat. But I think, if anything, that should pull you over to my side. I mean, now you gotta be boneless. You hate bress meat. But the texture is not the same. Yeah. I think that's because they pull it off, they cut it, and then they cook it so instead of it being cooked all in you know, one piece. I think buy them chopping it up and then cooking it differently is why it
tastes so different. Or it might at sometimes be thigh. Maybe sometimes it's thigh if it's done in house sometimes are you just are you just having a conversation with yourself now? No, I'm thinking, because I'm thinking there had to be two points where it was it had to be thigh. Mm it I think that, Um, I think that this this moment right here, that's when we kick it over to the listener, do you know, I think so? I think we asked them what they think, what they're
passionate about are they bone in or boneless? You know what I mean? And then and then especially a especially for my men out here, all right, if you're out here eating, if you're out here a carnivore in the manisphere, all right, yeah yeah, yeah, in the in the in the uh, in the bro planes. What if you if you're out here enjoying your meats, keeping your bones like you're supposed to, so you can look back on and
be like, yes, I'm a primal beast. Okay, So when you go to Apple, ask them for an extra bowl, all right, so you can toss your bones in like a savage m So you can toss the bones in and let people see. Actually, what you should also do is keep that bowl at the edge of the table so people passing by can see all the bones and they see who they're messing with if they step to you. All right, what if there are men out there m M who don't like the fact that there's um bones
in the chicken. Yeah, if they don't like it, hey, they didn't need to step their pussy ut. They're gonna they're gonna have to. They're gonna have to start accepting some hard truths. Okay, that somebody had to die for you to have chicken, no matter what, So don't avoid the bones. Be thankful for the bones. So what you're saying is where fur okay, cut it? Um what yeah? You let us know you you you as the audience, let us know if it's bone in or boneless for you?
All right, which one do you enjoy more? Which one fills you up? Which one do you think you can eat more of? That's an interesting question. So you know, I know that I could probably eat more. I know I can eat more boneless chicken than I could eat um like wings. I think I'm the opposite because if it's boneless, I'd end up overdoing it. I think I think i'd eat too fast. The bone end slows me down long enough to like I'm still like steadily eating.
But hey, thank y'all so much for listening. Um, listen, thank you. If it wasn't for y'all, would be taking a nap right now. That's not true. I'd be working. I'm always working fair fair enough. Yeah, I'd just be doing another job, not be doing I can't say I would do like this podcast because it gives me an opportunity to talk to Josh all the time. And yeah, because we are not in the office anymore, I don't see Josh all the time. Yeah, yeah, that's true. It
does give us. It does give me a chance to do one of my favorite things. And that it's bother, Josh, It's never it's it's never a bother. You know. I never mind you being wrong, you know, and you teach me things sometimes, so you know, we're all we're all doing. Yeah, and my pioneer woman Walmartin Love will not be treated
like this. God. Okay. Well, if you want to catch up with us at any other point, you can listen to my podcast to Josh Johnson show comes out every Thursday, just like this podcast, and it's wherever you get your podcast. And if you want to catch up with duel, say, you can catch me in the mall with your daddy. That's not You've been in the mall with anybody's dad. Uh wait, maybe an uncles, my cousin's. It's not the point you catch me on this podcast. It's on the
podcast that I have. I just have another one, but don't do it anymore. And you catch me on a daily show, you can catch me on Great North on Fox. You can catch me on Weit. Wait, don't tell me because for some reason they keep letting me come back because I don't know. But yeah, thank you so much for listening to hold up. I hope you have a great rest of the day and an amazing weekend. No I need to do that. Hey, everybody, it's Josh. I am gonna be on the road as part of the
Freshman Tour. I'm gonna be in all of these cities coming up, and I would love to see you there. You can get your tickets in the link that we provide in the show notes, But March thirty first through April first, I'm gonna be in Fort Collins, Colorado, April ninth, I'll be in Atlanta April tenth, Nashville April twelfth, Mobile, Alabama April thirteenth, New Orleans April fourteenth at Rouge, and April twent through the twenty second, I'm gonna be in
San Diego, California, So i'd love to see you there. Hello. Friends, I've got some dates coming up where you can see me your girl telling the comedy jokes. I'm gonna be at the Blue Room Comedy Club in Springfield, Missouri, April sixth through the eighth. I'm going to be at the Moontower Comedy Festival in Austin, Texas, April nineteenth through the twenty second. And I'm going to be at Last Boston
in Boston, Massachusetts, May eleventh through May thirteenth. It'll be available on my website, in my leak three and just at the club probably, so come see me. I love you, bye.