Hey, Cool Life!

A minipod of Hey, Cool Job! with a focus on mental health and creativity by New York Times bestselling author Mary H.K. Choi.

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Episodes

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 104

This one is about how people-pleasing glosses over your true feelings. And that thinking of others before yourself can become a total resentment fireball.

Nov 29, 2019•11 min•Season 1Ep. 104

This one is about contrary action. Sometimes the kindest, gentlest thing to do is nothing. Not picking up your addiction. Abstaining from the actions that lead to the headspace that causes cravings. But it’s also about doing small actions in opposition to these noisy thoughts so you can build muscle memory around what it feels like to endure these moments. And to prove to yourself that the moment always passes if you let it.

Oct 26, 2019•9 min•Season 1Ep. 103

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 102

This is about how intuition doesn’t yell or chide or browbeat. And how to tell if the ideas you’re having are intuition or distraction or addiction.

Oct 25, 2019•9 min•Season 1Ep. 102

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 101

This one is about how to handle options. About what to do when you have to make a decision and the stakes are high. It’s about how to choose without the obsession, sleepless number crunching and asking a million questions that other people often don’t have the answers to because they’re not f’in clairvoyant. It’s about trusting that you’ll be okay no matter the outcome.

Oct 08, 2019•12 min•Season 1Ep. 101

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 100

This one is about gratitude. And exhaustion. It’s also about book tour and surrender around discomfort and neutrality around outcome.

Sep 28, 2019•12 min•Season 1Ep. 100

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 99

This is about gratitude. And living in the moment of how cool and worthy your art is no matter the verdict.

Sep 02, 2019•10 min•Season 1Ep. 99

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 98

Boundaries rule! This ep is about how to set boundaries within your self and the practice of dedicating a discrete hour in the day to take the most considered actions around a task that feels overwhelming. And how that can quiet the mind from grinding gears recursively and obsessively without actually doing anything.

Aug 17, 2019•11 min•Season 1Ep. 98

Hey, Cool Job! Episode 97

This is about not saying yes to no things. And giving yourself permission not to do the most.

Aug 09, 2019•11 min•Season 1Ep. 97

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 96

This one is about how sometimes we may conflate fatigue with a moral issue. Like, I’m tired; WHAT DID I DO WRONG? And an invitation for gentleness when it comes to large-scale projects because perfectionism is not tenable.

Aug 01, 2019•14 min•Season 1Ep. 96

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 95

This one is about indecision and ruminating. And how tiring inaction actually is. Plus, a simple decision tree I use when the anxiety is super confusing and I don’t know how best to use my time.

Jul 26, 2019•14 min•Season 1Ep. 95

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 94

This is about non-reactivity around my parents in 100+ degree weather. And how the stories I tell myself are just stories (even if they are about old wounds.) And that for all my future tripping and magical thinking around family, my parents probably have deeply skewed ideas and expectations about me too. And it all just is.

Jul 08, 2019•13 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 93

Today is my one year birthday in recovery. And here are some thoughts about emotional homework, kindness to your internal creative spirit and holiday hangovers in whatever form they take. Have a gentle day.

Jul 05, 2019•14 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 92

Wherein I try to forgive myself for having fun even though it might not be “good” for me. And muddling through why I’m convinced I’ll be punished because these foolhardy acts MUST be self sabotage. (They could be; I don’t know!)

Jul 03, 2019•11 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 91

“If you weren’t worried about it, would it even be a problem?” This is about how the brain, as an awesome and creative defense mechanism, likes to believe that it can “solve” the future through ruminating. But is RIGHT NOW as it relates to safety, food, love, really that terrible? My brain just thinks it’s helping and I am trying to find gratitude in that without it taking me out of the present.

Jun 27, 2019•10 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 90

Fear has no arms and legs. It’s only when it compels you to action or inaction that it can truly bite you. This is for those days that you feel entitled to things you can’t seem to find—wisdom, insight, skill—and the self-loathing that can come from this hubris. Another reminder that creativity and recovery are not linear and accepting where you are TODAY can be a salve.

Jun 25, 2019•10 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 89

This is about those days where you build little belief systems around every action. Where you think there’s a right and wrong answer to everything from what you eat to the order in which you do things. Those fearful, superstitious days where you’re convinced that just knowing the outcome will help you move forward despite knowing in your heart that it’s a recipe for total standstill.

Jun 19, 2019•19 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 88

Do you ever get confused when the work that is fluid and loose and maybe even a little easy isn’t the work that you intended to make? This is about how the work that comes most naturally may not be what you want to explore and how distracting and flummoxing the experience can be.

Jun 18, 2019•8 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 87

This episode is about competitive spirituality and cataclysmic thinking around recovery. And how “vague dressing” helps me get out the door on summer days when there’s too much pressure to be #Fashion.

May 29, 2019•14 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 86

This is about indecision, how you can feel dread around the right decision for you, and being superstitious about the “right” way to do creative work because of the seductive nature of the muse narrative.

May 23, 2019•16 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 85

Okay, so you might be a perfectionist even if you’re messy and slightly lazy. But you also might be emotionally immature as a person who was considered precocious since forever. This is about how to deal when you’re awkward and leery moving through the world because you’re conflict avoidant to the point of being people avoidant.

May 20, 2019•13 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 84

It’s dreary some mornings and you may be in your feelings and that’s okay. This is just a gentle reminder that feelings are not facts and that your version of a story can become more neutral and less painful with time. (As long as you don’t apply a thing to that feeling or try to “fix it” or seek revenge.)

May 13, 2019•13 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 83

This is about that negative headspace. Where you feel like you’re in the upside down or a sunken place of your own making because you regret a decision about work or where you elected to be. This is also about how to gently move through it, stay curious about what you can learn and channeling that data into gratitude.

May 08, 2019•15 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 82

How I prepare for overwhelmingly exciting, challenging and vulnerable events as an anxious introvert. (Aka: Book promo is a gift and a curse)

May 06, 2019•14 min

Hey, Cool Life! Episode 81

This is about bad days. Where you feel like you’re doing all the work and yet you still get walloped by large overwhelming feelings of shame and pain. Days where all you can do is find solace in impermanence and eventually find words to talk about it.

May 01, 2019•12 min

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