OK team, welcome to the heroic man. the Today we are talking about why the need to have something you're passionate about in life is the biggest bunch of bullshit on the planet. Usain was yours, take it away. So Steve Martin, some of you might have heard of him, kind of a funny guy. Anyways, people would come up to Steve Martin randomly and they'd say, hey, Steve, could you tell me how can I be a better comedian? How can I be more famous? How can I have more fans? And on and on.
Basically, they were asking him, well, how the heck do I succeed, right? And Steve Martin would look at them and then he would say to them, well, you know what? It's pretty straightforward, all that you have to do if you have, you have to be so good that they can't ignore you. And, and, and that's it. And so basically people who come up to him and say, give me the secret to success, Tell me how I can be successful in about 7 days time. And see Martin, his answer was always the same.
He would literally say to people be so good that no one on the face of the planet can fucking ignore you. And, and he said the, the, the, the strange thing about this, right, he said no one, absolutely no one ever wanted to listen to his advice, right? People, he'd say, people would just ignore him. So you'd go up to one of the most successful comedians of all time, ask him how he would successfully give you the answer. And then people would, would act like he was battered crazy,
right? And, and, and people are always interested in the how right do you guys see? There's too many of us. That's all we ever do. We interested in the how you go up to someone and you say, well, can you tell me what's the secret to being wealthy? Somebody tells you and then you'll be like, no, no, no, that's wrong. I want to know how right. And so Steve Martin said the same thing. He said he would tell people be so good that no one can ignore
you. That is literally the secret to anything in life, the secret to success, the secret to wealth, the secret to on and on and on, right? And, and, and he said, well, people would be like, Nah, Nah, no, not interested. I just want to know how the fuck do I get, how do, how the fuck do I get an agent or how do I do this or how do I do that? And, and his point was this, right, that we want to get so good, right that no one in the face of a spinner can ever ignore us guys.
It's an incredible right way that a master Craftsman like, like Steve Martin was honestly go, go, go and listen to to some of his work, right? He, he incredibly was a massive what he did right? And, and, and, and this is what I want to talk to you about today, right? How, how do, how do we create the mindset of, of, of, of craftsmanship? How do we become so good, right, that no one in the face of the planet can, can, can ignore us, right? And, and, and so a couple of
things, right? Number one in, in, in this is what probably 1 of the most important theories in psychology, right? So there there's a concept that, that, that in psychology we, we talk about gold self determination theory. And so self determination theory basically, right? It, it, it, it helps us to create the, the, the mindset, the mindset of master craftsmanship. And, and so a couple of things about it #1 right. It is a couple of components.
So the, the first component of self determination theory, right, is, is the concept of autonomy. And, and so this, this autonomy basically captures this notion that, that, that, that what we want to do is we want to have control over our work environment. So the first thing about self determination theory, right? So self determination theory, like I said, describes how you can create this mindset, right, of of success, how you can create the mindset of being a master craftsmanship.
And in in the first component of it is a sense of autonomy. Do I have right control over my work environment? Right? You see this, all of us, we need to have a lot of control over over what we do, right? And and then we need to feel that they're all over. Work matters, guys, ask yourself, right, do you ever do you ever whatever you do, whether you work for yourself or you work for someone else, right? Do you control over what you do right?
And, and, and and, and, and then do you feel right that all of your work matters or, or do you feel like, well, you know what? The other thing I'm doing is just, it really doesn't make a difference in the world, right? The, the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the second component, right, of self determination theory, right is, is, is this concept of, of competence, right? And, and, and we we all need to, to have competence guys again, right?
If whatever you're doing right, if you're not already world classed, if you're not freaking good, if you're not extraordinary, right, then then you do check in with yourself. Is, is this the thing that that I'm, that I actually am wanting to do be be because the, the starting point for anything is that I have to be competent, right? I, I have to have at least right competency in, in, in, in, in
whatever I do, right? And, and, and, and we know this, it's psychologist and it's researchers, right? We, we, we found that, that, that that's, it's incredibly important if if you want to feel good at what you do, yeah, it's too many of us, right? We, we get up in the morning, right? And, and we're supposed to do what whatever our craft is where I work for someone else in the corporate job, where I'm a copywriter, fit, pro coach, whatever, right? And, and we have no energy
towards doing that. And, and one of the reasons is because the work that I do doesn't put me in the flow. And it doesn't put me in the flow because I'm not competent in, in, in, in what I do, right? And, and, and, and, and then and, and the third, the third component of 73 emission theory, right? Is this concept of relatedness right again, right. I need to know that, that that I like, right? Or well, I need to like the
people with who I work. Guys, ask yourself, right, whether it's your clients or or your team members, do you actually like the people who you work with? Do you like your clients? I see this on Facebook all of the time. So many cultures will say, you know what? Yeah, I hate my clients. Clients are such a bunch of morons. It's so difficult to find good clients. Bosses say, well, you know what? Now I hate my boss, I hate my company, I hate my team members. It's so it's so difficult to, to
find good team members. Do you see this, that, that, that, that, that one of the components of, of success is, is that we, we, we have to have a sense of relatedness. We, we, we need to like the people with whom we work. Again, whether it's your clients or your team members, right, or, or, and, and so these three components, right, relatedness, autonomy and competency, right, are the elements of, of
intrinsic motivation. Guys, again, I'm repeat this for you guys that, that all of us, too many of us, we look outside for motivation. We say, well, you know, what? If I hire a coach, if I hire a mentor, if I read this book, if I do the scores, I will finally find motivation, right? And, and, and, and that's so wrong. The, the, the best form of motivation is intrinsic. It comes from within, right? And you will never, ever, ever
have intrinsic motivation. You'll, you'll never have the motivation to get up in the morning and literally rock the world if you don't have those three things, if you don't have a sense of autonomy, right? That, that, that, that, that, that I have control over my work environment, right? And I, and I don't have control over what I do, right? And, and, and, and, and I, and I don't feel like that, that my
world is tremendous. The, the second thing is that you won't have intrinsic motivation if you don't have a sense of competency. And the third one is you won't have intrinsic motivation if you don't, if you can relate to the people you work with, again, whether it's your team members, your boss, your clients or whatever, right? And, and, and it doesn't make sense. Can you see this that, that, that, that, that with, with
those three things, right? And, and and so we know that those three, those three things impacts right on, on on whether whether I'm motivated to to do the work that is masterful and, and, and, and, and, and, and that that will allow people to say, holy fuck, you know what? He's absolutely someone right? That that that that none of us can ignore. And, and, and so the the first part of, of, of being
successful, right? And, and, and, and and, and being someone that people look at and say, well, you know what, holy fuck, that person is world class. The extraordinary. I want to work with him. I want to hire that person or I wanted that that person do the work for me, right? Is, is those three things. And the second part is, right, with all of the research, right, on self fulfillment and, and, and intrinsic motivation and success. Do you know what the research
tells us, right? That is not on that list? Well, well, here's the thing, right? So a psychologist, we've gone to study greatness. We now understand what, what the components and that that needs to make someone so good that no one can ignore them, right? And, and we also know what's not on that list. So we know what's on that list, self competency, relatedness, autonomy, and and we also know what's on the list.
And guys, here's the thing, nowhere like despite what all of the coaches and gurus, whatever will tell you, go and find your patient. Unless you're not patient, unless you're passionate about this thing, you'll never be good at right? And all the research says right, There is nowhere, nowhere, absolutely nowhere in the research, right? The science tell us that you have to do that. You have to discover a pre-existing passion and then build your life around it.
I'm going to do this for you guys. Can you guys see this, that nowhere in the research, nowhere does the science tell us that, that, that, that in order to be successful, you need to 1st discover a pre-existing passion and, and, and then spend your building your life around it. Right, guys, do you see this? The, the, the gurus and experts will tell you, well, you know what, if you want happiness right? Then, then, then, then, then, then, then all you need to do right?
Just go discover your patient first. You discover your patient versus I promise you, you'll be extremely happy. You'll make a shit ton of money, right? And then all you need to do is just just build your life around it. Guys. It's been said in the beginning, it's fucking bullshit. It is literally the biggest piece of bullshit advice that anyone can give you.
Because we know that all that you need right to be extraordinary, all that you need to do like to build an awesome life, all you need to do is be successful. All you need to be to be a world class right is autonomy, relatedness, and competence. That's it. That is literally the secret to success. There's nowhere that says you need to be patient about anything you do. Like honestly, if if your mentor around work should be fucked Passion. What the fuck does passion have to do with anything?
I don't need to be passionate to be world class at, at, at whatever I do. All I need to do is I need to have a sense of autonomy, a sense of relatedness and a sense of confidence. And, and guys, guess what, right? That's absolutely great news for all of us, right? Because we can stop bullshitting ourselves and telling ourselves, you know what? I'm not successful because I still haven't figured out what,
what I'm passionate about. Because all of us, absolutely all of us, right, can create those three things. All of us can create autonomy at any time. We can change our environment. We can change our environment to be a better, to be better for us to work in, right. We, we can at any time do work right then we feel that that matters. But at any time we can change
how we relate to other people. And at any time we can learn to be competent at, at, at the things we do right and, and, and, and, and we don't have to give a fuck about about what we're most passionate about. Do you see that as we do too many people And, and when you ask them what you're doing, well, you know what? I still haven't figured it out. I don't know what I'm patient about.
So until I don't figure out my passion, Nah, I'm just here like a zombie sleepwalking through life, right? And, and it doesn't make sense. Can you see this, that that ultimately, right success, then right, is a controllable choice. It's not dependent on some average other arbitrary thing like patient and, and, and, and in any, the, the, the second part about this right in, in this whole debate about passion versus craftsmanship, right, guys, here's the thing, right?
Most of us, what do we do? Well, unfortunately, because we haven't been taught any better, We operate with a passion mindset, right? But, but again, if, if you want to be incredibly wealthy, right, if you want to be incredibly successful, right, then, then, then, then what we need to do right is that we need to make the chef. We need to stop operating with the patient mindset. The thing with the patient mindset, right? It's all about what the fuck is in it for me.
Again, when I'm pursuing the patient mindset, right? It's all about me or what's in it for me, right? What am I passionate about, right? How the fuck do I design perfect lifestyle right? Where I'm living in a beach in Bali or Thailand or somewhere, right? Working the four hours a week job, right? And then I get to do whatever the fuck I want to do right? Whenever I want, wherever I want. Do you see this?
That mindset, that mindset about I'm going to do, I'm going to follow my passion and go live on the beach in Bali, work 4 hours a week, do whatever I want, wherever I want with wherever I want, right? That is literally all about me, right? The question begins with, well, what's in it for me, right? What will my work do for me, right? And, and the Craftsman on the other hand, Steve Martin talked about the, the Craftsman mindset on the other hand, right? It flips the patient mindset
around, right? And ask this question, How can I create extraordinary value, right and serve as profoundly as I can? Guys, I'm repeat this for you guys. The, the the Craftsman mindset. Let me shift the, the, the patient mindset on his head, right? And where's the patient mindset? Asked what seems for me, the grassman mindset says, well, how can I create something extra ornery? How can I be, how can I be extra ornery, right? How can I create extraordinary value, right and serve as
profoundly as I can? Do you see that that is literally the, the, the, the craftsman's mindset. It starts from the space of, of me wanting to serve others and, and, and, and, and in a world class level. Let's ask yourself, when you go to work today, when you work with clients, are you approaching it from a place of being world class? Are you asked is, is the question that drives everything you do One way I'm, I'm asking myself, am I being extraordinary?
What I'm, what, what I'm doing? I'm extraordinary in my work as a leader, as a boss, as a copyright there, as a coach, as a foot pro or as a psychotherapist or, or or whatever it is I do guys. And again, right, If you, if you want to get so good that, that, that, that, that people can't ignore you. And we, we, we, we all would love to post a real on, on, on Instagram, post a post on, on Facebook or whatever. And, and if millions of people
follow us, right? And, and, and, but it starts with, with this idea that, that you have to become, right. It's not about virality. You literally have to become the type of person that nobody ignores, right? And, and, and if you want to get so good that, that, that, that, that people out there can't ignore you, right? So that, so, so that you can create more and more, right, more money, more competence, more fame, more power, whatever
you have more ease, right? Well, well, well, then guess what, right? And, and if you want to create your, your, your ideal business, right? If you want to have more competency, more autonomy, more relatedness, right, you have to focus on, on, on what you can do, right, to create an astonishing level of value in your work. And I'm repeating this in ending, right? That, that, that if you want to create more, right, more money, more autonomy, more competency,
more relatedness, right? And, and, and you want to create and you want to create your ideal lifestyle, your ideal business, right, then, then, then you need to shift the focus from, from, from, well, you know what, I'm only going to do this if I'm passionate about this. It's all about me, right?
And and and your focus is to shift to well, what can I do today, right in, in in the next interaction of work that I do like in the next block of work that I do like, what can I do right to create such astonishing levels of value right that people will be holy fuck, you know what? This is someone that I can't ignore. This is someone that I love to work with. Guys, any questions before we end that was? Insightful man and actually I got a little example of last
night. So this weekend is the London Heroic Man event and we got 40 guys. So we sold out the event. And last night as I was walking back from the gym, I'm like, right, this is how can I make this a real wow experience for all the guys that come in on the weekend? And I was getting really excited
about that. And when I got into the building where I'm hosting the event, I pulled in a couple of people last night that I want to get into my team for the event to to make it a more of a Wow experience. But what happened last night with those two people, we were sat for an hour talking about how we were going to make this world class, how we're going to install like Wow experiences into it and everything that you've just spoken about there.
So contribution, doing something that matters, incompetent at what we do and like being around people that we like, the relatedness that was all there like last night. And there was so much energy between the three of us and like everything you just said made complete sense about what we were doing last night. There was, there wasn't passion there, but it like, but passion came through because of all the energy that we were creating together. Yeah. Do you guys see this?
What Pete was saying that that his mindset didn't start with passion, right Passion, OK, it's especially not a bad thing, but passion should always be an, a, a byproduct, right? The, the, the end result of doing freaking great work that because I've done the great work, right? I therefore create a life that I'm passionate about.
Too many of us, what we want to do is we want to create the life, a passionate, a life that we're passionate about and, and, and then figure out well, all of the things that we need to do. And, and, and, and on the other hand, it's, it's I, I do great work. I do work that matters, right? I, I, I'm extremely confident in what I do, right? I have a great sense of relatedness, right? And as a, by product of it, right, you have a life that, that, that you're passionate about.
You have a business that you're passionate about. You have a career that you're passionate about. Yeah, and it also came, it came from the Craftsman mindset rather than the passion mindset. So the Craftsman mindset of how can I create something extraordinary for all the guys? Like it was, it was not, it was absolutely not about me. It was about the the guys and then through so the craft from mines here and then through that passion came. Yeah, absolutely. Thanks man, team, good to see
you. Until next week or tomorrow. You guys.