Ep.68. V Day recap, it’s time to restructure The Bakers Act, we love dating shows and Robert Lee Noye is a hero. Domestic violence is serious, don’t bomb the wrong house, you can tell a lot about a person by the music they listen to. Enjoy xo Betterhelp.com/Hello to save 10%
Crystals cat is acting like Pata Fria, assume everyone has home surveillance, keep your pets out of your webcam scenes and always support those that support you. Valentine’s tees are a huge hit, no more butter before bed and radio dedications are signs of a good friend. https://www.instagram.com/hellodysfunction
Crystal saves a cat through osmosis, Pata Fria ponders getting a shock collar for Dottie. Water your hot pockets and wash your ass. Some fun fan questions, a Dom story with a pro golfer and Crystal’ s early wrestling career.
The weekend recap, family drama, McDonald’s soda secrets, pass on the Grammy’s, be on time aka early, practice code switching and let’s all be smart with our money. Enjoy xo
IKEA sucks, Crystal hates January. Pata Fria searches for a dead body and dentures are really common. Read a book, watch the Aaron Hernandez doc and don’t wear nazi costumes. Enjoy xo www.Instagram.com/Hellodysfunction www.facebook.com/HelloDysfunction www.Twitter.com/dysfunctionShow
Crystal has another sinus infection and Pata Fria’s energy bill has skyrocketed. We need multiple streams of income so try everything, even singing about cats. Don’t shame people for working regular jobs, don’t be a house pirate. Donate your organs and check your pets for wetness. Enjoy xo Instagram @Hellodysfunction www.facebook.com/HelloDysfunction
The first episode of 2020 is here with more vagina talk, explore the possibilities of lube, teach your kids to properly prank each other, never trust a leather kilt, follow the rules of the internet, keep your brains hydrated, some interesting beauty procedures and ear maintenance Enjoy xo Betterhelp.com
It’s the end of a decade and this week we have the amazing Lil Debbie joining us. Holiday recap, tips on successful gift giving, cats are thieves, New Years traditions from around the globe, don’t cheat during monopoly, baby jousting, and our favorite white trash delicacies. Happy New Year!!
Crazy Xmas shopping and delivery delays, Crystal celebrates 14yrs w Mark, internet matchmaking, did Pata Fria finally cure her rash, cancel culture, trust your intuition, delicate familial subjects, save your skin after you die, and did a sweat shop make your outfit? Enjoy Betterhelp.com/Hello
Rainy days, kids know when you’re gay, celebrity tension, ‘tis the season for kindness, culture vultures, Crystal’s Animal Rescue is still in business, don’t share contact lenses and be nice to strangers that text you. Enjoy xo
Live show recap, Billy was a joy, Apple is glitching our phones, kids shouldn’t give haircuts, foreplay is mandatory, possible potato crisis, signing up for Better Help, listener questions, I probably won’t let an animal get raped. Enjoy xo BetterHelp.com/Hello
Vacation observations, don’t take your dog’s pills, poop forensics, respect other laws and cultures while visiting abroad, T.I. is still gross, Bezos’ latest donation, and don’t use my good paper towels. Enjoy xo Sponsored by Betterhelp.com use code: Hello for 10% off Betterhelp.com/Hello
Happy Anniversary. This week’s episode was recorded live before a studio audience. Crystal revisits a childhood kidnapping. Would you paint your son’s nails? Don’t lock your customers inside the store. Shameful OCD subtypes. Men definitely fake orgasms.
It’s National Kindness Day, is Rodney Reed a serial rapist? Dottie is leaking clear sh*t, there‘s actually a narcissism spectrum, don’t check anyone’s hymen and stop wasting paper towels. XO instagram/@hellodysfunction Facebook/hellodysfunction
This week the girls periods are syncing in studio 54 with a Halloween recap, no one wants to get drunk and go to bed alone, an absent speculum, always check your tires, strange news and the first round of attendees drawn! Enjoy xo instagram/@hellodysfunction Facebook/hellodysfunction
Don’t trust Crystal with your Mexican drug operation, the Bay Area has been going thru it, tell your callers when they’re on speakerphone, Kanye does gospel, the universe is being weird, Always removed a logo no one really cares about, don’t be racist for Halloween Enjoy xo
Cringy words, Crystal has another damn cat, prepare your kids for sticky situations, yoni pearls, blood diapers, the joker, trauma makes you great and a few listener questions. Enjoy xo T-shirts & Sweatshirts Available at Hellodysfunction.com
Kids are difficult, tell your car you love it, the Joker hits home, planned electricity suspension scare, Pata Fria was in a low speed chase with the cops and lots of listener questions Enjoy xo
The joys of getting old, Pata Fria is still a practicing doctor, true love of true crime, Amber Guyger is guilty, read more books and parenting woes. Enjoy xo
Typical post break up transformation, Crystal got some new wheels, stranger’s awkward convos, everything is linked to parenting, unusual attractions and white privilege Enjoy.
Pata Fria’s been getting artsy, Crystal is still car shopping, dreams and your memory are married, tarot readings coming soon, and don’t support shitty celebrities. Enjoy.
Maria tried to scam Crystal, babies don’t have kneecaps, big fondue plans and an interesting “what if”... Enjoy
Episode 46 “I Got Played” This week the girls return with some fun and not so fun announcements. Pata Fria is a newly single Grandma, Dottie is adjusting nicely, Crystal is collecting formal gowns for a great cause, Keto is scary and some listener questions are answered. Enjoy.
This week the girls are back with lots of talk about Hawaii and the introduction of Dottie. Getting old sucks, weird dreams and lots of listener questions. Enjoy.
Episode 44 starts off with Pata Fria manifesting a new pet and sharing her latest reading, unapproachable soccer moms, school shopping is a drag, the truly dark side of being an empath, drifting off your meds, dysfunctional event planning and don't get in trouble at work!
This week is episode 43 and the girls discuss some unfortunate events. Always check your drivers license for fine print, brace yourself before entering the post office, download a vpn before watching snuff, and real friends make radio dedications. Enjoy xo.
This episode focuses on a few odd subjects. Crystal's grandfather's feature in a book, don't lose yourself in a relationship, is the zodiac international, the rapture is all a big set up, don't give the internet your info, and do let your friends teach you sexual acts. Enjoy.
Episode 41 starts off with a LA vacation recap, Crystal makes a medical discovery, gentrification woes, movie suggestions, animal tales, kids say the darnedest things, loving all things gross, and a very creepy murder Enjoy xo
Episode 40 is back at you with an announcement of the new Facebook group "Hello Dysfunction, the meetup", hot girl summer with golden girl knees, how this show was born, Pata Fria reunites w her dad, Crystal needs to lock her doors, don't flirt with your son and boobs are sex toys. Enjoy xo
Episode 39 is here after a week off...the girls describe their new room, another example why humans suck, some celebrity news, food made from science and some beauty tips Enjoy.
