We'd like to acknowledge that traditional custodians of the land on which this podcast was produced, the Galligall people of the Orination. We pay our respects to elder's past and present.
It's November twenty twenty one and we're in Adelaid's Flinders Hospital with Kelly Finlayson. Kelly gave birth to baby Sophia just three months ago, her first child with AFL star Jeremy Finlayson. But today she isn't here for a postpartum checkup. She's here for a kolonoscopy, the one she's been waiting months for, which was canceled in the height of the pandemic. Almost immediately the kolonoscopy takes a turn for the worst.
The gastro enterologist turns to Kelly and says, this is what cancer looks like for the twenty five year old mum. Her world changes in an instant. In the days, she'd be told she has stage four bow cancer. I'm at Middleton and this is head Game today, resilience in the face of an unthinkable diagnosis. Kelly Finlayson, thank you so much for joining me on my podcast head Game. Now cop talk about head Game and you're someone that needs
to have your head in the game. You need to be headstrong with what's going on in your life at the moment. Wow, we'll get into that very very shortly. But how are you.
Yeah, I'm actually doing okay today.
Okay? Is okay? Kelly? Take me back to your childhood.
So I lived a pretty mundane, easy, ordinary childhood. I have a younger brother, mum and dad, same house, still live in the same house that I was born in. They do, I don't, but so yeah, like a pretty easy country town, Port Lincoln, so right on the beach here an essay, and played every sport you can think of. So I was just a busy little girl with lots of energy and not much has changed. Really, just a confident, little independent person.
Sounds like you just see it, like myself. A normal upbring in, happy, go lucky. What was your first ever job?
Yeah, my mum was a manager of a hotel, So a housekeeper.
Oh really? Yeah, so you went around changing the sheets and clean bathrooms and stuff like that.
Yeah, very underage, but that's how we would get like that's my pocket money, I guess, would be whatever four hours on a Sunday morning or whatever, and that would be me housekeeping. Yep.
How old are you if you don't mind me asking, Kelly.
Yeah, I'm twenty eight. I'm twenty nine in December.
Twenty nine, December. And what age were you when you met Jeremy?
I was twenty one at a Justin Bieber concert.
Take me back to that, Justinean, How did you set eyes on him? And how was it love at first sight or was it just a case of exchange phone numbers and we're going on a date?
Exchanged snapchats because we were young twenty one year olds. But I didn't actually meet him at the concert. I was just insandnely for the concert and we met at a pub later. But he is a big Justin Bieber fan, so I like to drop that in.
Yes, Jeremy, listen, he's is it a believer? A belief?
Yeah, that's it.
So that moment changes your life, really, doesn't it. You You meet Jeremy and did the relationship develop quite fast?
Yeah? Very quick? Moving our relationship so again, yeah, rekindled in twenty nineteen when I moved back to Australia and then by June twenty twenty we were living together. So six months later really.
No, messing around their kedesis later, are you moving because that's serious, right, moving in together?
Yeah, Well, it was the time of COVID, so it was either moving together or in no, one'm going to see each other again.
Did it feel nice? Did it feel good during COVID that you had each other?
Yeah? Definitely. I think that obviously fast tracked a lot of people's relationships, but it definitely made it, I guess known that we were the people for each other.
And when did you start realizing that you had a few issues or you had a few symptoms or maybe need to go to hospital.
Yeah. So the first time that I actually sought help was at the start of twenty twenty two days actually before lockdown happened in Victorious, So I had a colonostu to be booked for the twenty second of March, and then obviously locked down and elective procedures got canceled, so I never actually got the procedure, but I did seek help that month. But looking back now, I've had issues for up to probably five years prior to diagnosis.
And what are or what were these issues?
So in frequency, in bow movements, weight fluctuation, A lot of the issues I guess that I was having were really common with just being a female, So like abdominal bloating usually once a month, which obviously comes with the mental cycle as well, the pain there as well, the changing weight, the changeing tiredness. Like, all of the symptoms that I were having, I guess weren't uncommon, but the way that I was having them were probably more often than others were.
And what was the moment Why did you decide why I need to go and check this out? Because if you say it's been going on for five years, you're obviously just thinking that these are normal problems, just that they go away. You know, it's just just the monthly thing that happens. But what made what was that mindset switch where you thought, actually, no, I need to go and get this checked out.
Yeah. So I ended up having blood in my store, well on the toilet paper, so obviously I couldn't tell whether that was in my store or not. But that's what made me go seek more help. I was seeing an actual path. I thought maybe I was intolerant or something, maybe I had yeah ibs or something like that. I don't know, something obviously not right, But it was kind of cool to be lactose intolerant at that time or have a gluten intolerant, so they didn't really take me
very seriously. And then yeah, obviously I had blood in a stall sample, so that's why I had the colonists could be booked, which was later canceled as an elective procedure.
Wow. So do you think they didn't take you seriously because you were young? You know you? Yeah, agile and just a case of you know, you don't need you don't need to check out, you're good to go.
Yeah. Well at that point I was twenty four, so I was quite young. I was writing marathons like I was the pinnacle of health. Nothing that would scream about cancer, do you know what I mean?
Yeah? Yeah, And during lockdown, the relationship with Jeremy Blossoms and you fell pregnant.
Yeah. COVID babies, there's lots of them. Yeah, so we actually felt pregnant at the six months after we were living together, so it was really quickly turned around.
So you don't mess around, Kelly, No.
We don't. When you know, you know exactly when you know, you know. And we just spent three months in Queensland with all of our teammates for Jeremy's teamates babies, and I guess he saw how maternal I was, so when we did fell pregnant, it was a no brainer and obviously that was something we're really excited about. We ended up having Sophia for giving birth to Sophia in the
hubs the next year, so that was really interesting. Jeremy guests had to call time on his season otherwise he would risk being locked out of the state that we were already a foreign state. We're already in Queensland, whereas we were living in Sydney. So yeah, it was a big messy time of our life, but the best time of our life all the same time.
Is there anything that you know that stood out? Is there anything that because you went through your whole pregnancy with all your checkups and all your tests and then you give birth, was there any major signs or major sort of symptoms where you know, the doctor, the nurse or whatever would go well, something's not right here, or was no signs?
Yeah, there was nothing more than I'd already experienced. I did present to the hospital the emergency department a few times prior to my pregnancy with the pains and stuff, but every time I would just get told I had COVID and to go home and have and rest, which at the time, I guess everyone was scared of this viral disease, so I can't blame them. But during my pregnancy, I had a lot of pressure in my pelvis, which obviously makes sense now, but at the time we thought
we just had a big baby. So it wasn't until she was born and she was tiny that we were like, where do all this pain come from? And also when giving birth, they my placenter was like it looked like a state had been like cut up basically, Like it wasn't a big bore, a big plate. It was like all cut up meat, basically my placenter. So once they
saw that, they were like, there's something not right here. Yeah, But they were the only signs really that something else was wrong, and I wasn't just a pregnant woman.
How hard was it to get an appointment or booking that you needed because you already had it counceled, you had it counseled before you gave birth, and now they see these signs. How long after to you actually revisit the hospital for your colonoscopy?
So I was in complete denial and kind of just putting everything I was experiencing down to being postpartum. I guess I never had another berth to compare it to to know that this wasn't really normal, Like not going to the toilet for ten days at a time, and then when I'm going, I'm going fifteen times in an hour like that. I didn't realize that that's not normal. And I was terrified to go the toil after giving birth. Don't get me wrong, most women are, but I guess
I just had an extreme case of that. And it wasn't until three months postpartum that Jeremy actually made a joke about me needing a porterloo because of the frequency that I needed to go every time we went for a drive, I'd make him fully to the service station or whatever it may be, and he, yeah, made a joke about needing a portaloo. And then that was kind of my last straw that I didn't think was very funny, and went and saw a GP who had me booked
to see a gastro ontologist the next day. So once she heard my symptoms, which I'm really quite lucky because I had just moved back to here, to Adelaide. We got a trade with Jeremy's work. Had only been here for two weeks and had to go see just a bolk build GP, the closest one that I could find the next available appointment, and I got really lucky that it was a female GP that took me really seriously as soon as I told her, I guess what was going on?
And take me back to the day that you go. It's three months after you've given birth, or they're thereabouts. You go back in for your for your colonoscopy. Take me through that day. Was it just you just thought you're going to go in do this and then you're going to walk out and you get the results whenever. What was going through your mind on that day?
Yeah, Well, the hardest part of a kolonoscopy is the prep, which I learned the hard way, and when you have a complete bower block, it's quite hard to pass the prep. I thought that I was just constipated, but obviously it turned out that there was a fat tumor in my ass. I say that very easily because that's just how it is.
But yeah, so I was at home with Sophia, so my three month old breastfeeding still by myself because Jeremy just started this new job here in Adelaide and he had to do all the media and stuff around that, and I was taking the prep at the same time. And he got home from wherever he had to be that day and I was asleep on the shower floor with the shower running, and she was asleep on the
bath mat next to me. So it kind of puts in perspective how hard the prep was on my body because I couldn't pass it the way you meant to. I was throwing it back up. So that was the morning of my colonoscopy. I presented to the day suite
at about midday. My kolonoscopy was booked for about two o'clock that afternoon, And the part that I was the most angry about, I guess was the fact that I hadn't eaten for twenty four hours and it was kept being delayed, which in hindsight obviously like really not the biggest deal. I'm angry, Oh, I was, And when I woke up and the nurses being so beautiful to me, and like, obviously they knew exactly what was going on, but I thought they were just being so nice because
I was starving. Yeah, and then I woke up thinking not much of it. Maybe I'd get given a diet plan or something like that. Like I had this little baby that I had to look after. I couldn't be looking after myself. I walked into the gastrotologist's little room and he just turned around a piece of paper which had photos of the insides of my bow. Obviously I didn't know that that's what it was. But when he turned it around, he's like, this is what bow cancer
looks like. And I was like, oh, yeah, and what does my bows look like? And he's like, this is your bow.
I was like, oh, that's how they broke.
That, that's how it was delivered.
Yeah, what bow cancer looks like.
Yeah. So I think that he does this every day of his life. That it's kind of like if we don't say it like this and we make a big deal about it, I don't know, it was so weird.
Well, it is a pretty big deal, to be fair, And what's your first initial thought process after that?
Yeah, so I kind of yeah, I just went blank a little bit. I didn't give him much, so he kept giving me more information. I guess he was just speaking and speaking and speaking and speaking, And basically we left off with he'd already spoken to his mate, a surgeon here in Adelaide, and I was booked in to see him tomorrow, like the day after after hours, So as soon as he'd knocked off from work, basically he was just squeezing me in And that's how we left off.
So I left off with very little knowledge, knowing that I had bow cancer with a piece of paper that has photos of it, and knowing that I was going to see the surgeon the next day.
Wow, so that's the only news you get. You don't notice severity of it. Obviously, the next day you're going to meet someone who's going to really really break it down. What was that that period before that next meeting the next day? What's going through your head? Where's your head at? Where are you at?
Yeah? So I actually sat in the back seat of the car with Sophia in her bascinette, which I hadn't done for ages. I feel like I couldn't let her out of my sight. It was almost like she was gone without any even starting anything or even knowing what I was doing. Like that bond that we had was about to be broken. Like It's like I knew before I knew it was animalistic, almost how destrayed I was.
My husband, well, my boyfriend at the time, was on the phone to my mum basically telling her to get on the next flight with Again, we had no information, so we couldn't even tell her the severity of it because we didn't know. He also caught a couple of friends that were meeting me. They were at home when I got home for them to try and help out, I guess, But at the same time, I was like not wanting help because I was like, I'm still able
to look after my own daughter. Like I'm like, I've got a diagnosis, whatever it may be, but I'm still nothing's happened, nothing's changed in the last day other than a few words.
Psychologically, you're looking at your daughter, do you does it break you? Does it? Or are you just thinking? Right? I need to find out the severity of it. I need to find out exactly what it is.
You know?
Or is your world literally crumbling in that car?
Yeah? Like I was, I was nowhere. I was literally nowhere. My thoughts were complete, Marsh. I was incomplete denial or I had I'd never heard of cancer and had it linked to anyone younger than my grandparents. So it was like it was just a weird, really weird reality to be living in, especially knowing that it was directed at me. Wasn't like I wasn't hearing on the news. I wasn't.
It was like it was real and I kind of had to try and process that while also trying to keep my head my head strong, funnily enough so that my husband didn't crumble because I needed him to be able to parent as well as me try to parent. It was just there was so much happening, but at the same time we didn't even know what we had ahead of us, so it was so hard to try
and put things in place. But yeah, it was wild, and I don't I don't think he really realized what that was going to mean for us until obviously we'd sat down and we'd gone through it.
How does the next day play out? And did do your parents fly in and who's there when you realize the severity of the bow cancer that you have.
So one of my friends is quite medically inclined, and she happened to show up that night that I was diagnosed, so she was going through the paperwork and I guess filling everyone in that was contacting me because I just went completely mute and didn't speak to anyone, didn't reply
to anyone, didn't answer phone calls. So she was, I guess, being that person that everyone went through, and she could tell mum just by looking at the photos that it definitely wasn't stage one or two, potentially stage three, but looking it was huge and it was everywhere like it's probably going to be stage four. But so I bring her with me to the surgeon's appointment, and my mum
rocked up that morning as well. So there was my mum, my best friend, my Jeremy, my boyfriend, and Sophia were all in the surgeon's office and he just had to try and I guess explain. He quite literally drew pictures to explain kind of what was going to go on, because it was going in one ear and out the other. But it wasn't until we had scan the following week that we realized I guess that it had spread elsewhere, so that it was stage.
Four, stage four cancer. What is stage four cancer?
Yes, it's actually stage four terminal cancer, which we wow. The media loves to pick up that word, but it's essentially just means that it's spread from the primary tumor, which was in my rectum, to another organ. So if it's only spread to the lymph nodes, it would be stage three. If it was the primary tumor, and just outside of the primary tumor in those linkhodes I be stage two and stage one is just that tumor.
So you literally get told that you've got terminal cancer, the worst possible outcome that you could have, you know, hopeful and wished for. What's the atmosphere like in the room when that word comes out, you've got terminal cancer?
It was a lot of confusion, I guess, only because we've just heard of this cancer and now it's terminal. And my surgeon's body language went from we will cure you you're twenty five years old to or will try prolong your life as soon as he realized the extent as well. It's not one that's easily cured, but it is curable. About cancer is curable, it's just I'm one of the unlucky cases that have yet to hit remissions.
So yeah, it was a lot at the time, and all I was worried about was my fertility, and I guess the collateral damage that I know cancer brings obviously a three month old, and that was my forefront of my mind. Even having this diagnosis. All I was thinking about was her future and her having siblings. And my surgeon looked me dead in the eye and said, would you rather give her a sibling or a mum? So that kind of was my wake up call, like, holy shit, this is real.
Wow, how does that affect you as a mother.
It's like I've failed her?
Why was that?
Well, yeah, I guess you have all these ideas and preconceived, like lived experience of how you've grown up and how you want your family to grow up, and then like this little three month old, she can't do anything. She doesn't have an opinion to be like I'd rather siblings, Like obviously she's never gonna say that, but do you know what I mean? Like, she doesn't get a say in this, and we dictate how her life lives. And in that moment, I was basically selfishly choosing myself over her life.
And how does Jeremy and your family take the news, Because again, going from zero to one hundred, like you said, I've got cancer, then terminal and cah, How did your family and especially Jeremy, your husband, what was there you know? Initial response? I suppose.
I don't think anyone really processed it until we were out of her, if that makes sense. So, like the nine months of doing the treatment and the surgeries, because it was surgery after surgery, it wasn't until we had no appointment booked that we were like, that just happened, and now we've got all of this to deal with. And that was probably the hardest part because we weren't
then relying on any medical stuff. We had to rely on our own thoughts and our own I guess decisions, and yeah, we really had to guess, take control of what had just happened, and deal with the collateral, which no one talks about. When you're coming out of this battle, as they call it, is what you're left without. A lot's taken from you, and it's not just taken from the patient, it's taken from everyone around you. My mom
had to quit her job, so she lost income. My mom had to move in with us, so she was away from my dad for nine months, so then he was without her. He had to learn how to cook and clean, which she's never done in his life. My husband, lall fiance at the time, was without a mother. He was being a dad and a mum or relying on my mom to help him parent, which it's just not something you would ever expect. And obviously they had to grow a really good connection and learn how to parent
together as in laws. So yeah, there was a lot happening, and I was kind of just in bed, rodding away, trying to leave each day, trying my best when I could. But there's not a lot of good days that I had in those first nine months.
So but you've got to quick, right, You've got you get this news terminal. Time's not on your side. What's the first first thing that happens? And I you know, treatment, how do you how do you progress with going right? Terminal? Does that mean that it's irreversible or like you said, you know they can cure bow camp. But that's so what's the what's the the immediate treatment for that?
Yeah, like you said, as soon as I said terminal, I assumed irreversible and obviously hoped and prayed and like promised myself that I'd get through it. But the reality was I was about to go through a hell of a fight to try and even stay alive each day. But my first point of call was weaning for breastfeeding. And I obviously you've never done that, you're a man, but weaning from breastfeeding hurts. It's a painful experience. And then because I stopped breastfeeding, I got my first period,
which is a whole nother game. As I was literally going to the hospital to get a stoma, so my bows reverted to my stomach to pass. Because I had a block, I couldn't go to the toilet, so I was laying in the bed with these two fake stonmas to choose which side to have it on. When I got my first period, and I had massed artists because I was weaning from breastfeeding. So that was all within
seven days of diagnosis, So it was absolutely crazy. I like what I tell you, I had no time to process it, and as much as I'm so glad, I didn't because I wasn't able to, I guess go down any dark thought paths or whatever. But yeah, I had no time to process anything. It was just go, go, go, trust what the doctor's saying and do what you told basically.
And what does that process look like. So you get the news. I suppose they give you a program straight away. What does that program look like?
Yep? So the stoma and then on my twenty sixth birthday of the week after, I started radiotherapy every day for five weeks as well as oral chemotherapy, So that was over Christmas. That was from the sixth of December until mid jan and then I had two weeks off because who two weeks off before I started intravenous chemotherapy for six months. So yeah, from November the twenty seventh when I had my stoma surgery to what the end of July, I was just go, go, go with treatment.
Do you feel like that, Well, it obviously did robbed your time as a mother. You know, you've got Sophia. Obviously the main thing is yourself to get to get treated. But how does it affect your relationship with Sophia?
Yeah, so I went from her obviously needing me and no one else really realistically because I was her breastfeeding parent too, not many months later having her come to the see me in hospital because I was there a lot, and no longer like if she wanted a bottle, no longer being like mummy, mummy. It was always Namma, which.
Is my mum.
So I guess I went from watching her need me to not need me at all, and it was absolutely crazy. It was definitely the hardest part was watching that, I guess, disconnect between the two of us.
And how did you deal with that psychologically? How did you think to yourself? Right, you know, I've got to got no choice, I've got to get through this. It must have been horrible.
Yeah, it was, like I said, the hardest part, But it was definitely. There was a point where I was almost jealous or envious of the people in my daughter's life that she called five women in her life mum before she realized that she only had one mom like she had all these people, and I had to I guess I had to really teach myself to know that they were there to help and they weren't trying to step on my toes. They were doing things because I couldn't.
It took a lot for me to realize that she was lucky to have them, not unlucky to not have me, If that makes sense, like it, Yeah, I had to play a lot of mind games with myself. I guess rephrasing things or flipping the switch and making sure that I could really be grateful rather than absolutely hating on these people that were doing everything for me, not against me.
Were you given a timeline, are you in your head as well? Are you planning for worst case scenario?
So we were working twelve week blocks, myself and my medical professionals. So once we got through each twelve week block, that was another scan, and I guess that would tell us what the next twelve weeks would look like. So my first year of diagnosis was definitely in those twelve week blocks, and maybe sometimes six weeks, depending on I guess what stage we were at. But I never I never thought that it would beat me. I never it never consumed my mind at all at all.
Never.
I was never giving in to the disease. I was always stronger than it. People would suggest like writing books for Sophia for different milestones, or putting my voice into a teddy Bear or all these things, but I did none of that because I genuinely believed that I would be there to see those milestones and I would be able to tell her that I loved her. She didn't need a Teddy Bear to tell her that she loved,
that she was loved. So yeah, I think by not giving into these things, and like even like my life insurance, they were like, yeah, you can have it, you're dying. I was like, absolutely not. I need that for when I do die. So but I believe that if I took that, that would be like some sort of calm or me accepting that I was dying. And I didn't. Yeah, I didn't let my body believe that I was dying. And I obviously I'm still here three years later. So whatever I'm doing, I'm doing okay.
And the pross Is it painful?
Is it?
Is it shocking? Is there a physical change with yourself during the period after?
Yeah, so I was really concerned about losing my hair.
I think any woman would be. But the chemotherapy that I was on, I didn't lose my hair, so I guess that was that's your main appearance as a woman, especially when you have long I had long, blonde hair, So this is not this is my regrowth because I did end up losing my hair eventually, and then yeah, so I looked like me, which also helped people treat me like me and not like a patient, which allowed me to act like me, which was really really helpful. But I did. I lost a shit ton of weight.
I mean I had a stoma, so I had a foreign object on my stomach. I didn't. I wasn't the normal mum that she should have had. But I was as good as I possibly could be. It was hard. I was allergic to one of the brands of that chemotherapy, which is why when I did relapse, I had to change chemotherapy, which meant lost my hair. But yeah, it
was I was on my deathbed. I was getting anaphyletic reactions every three weeks to this chemotherapy, so I was I was essentially dying every three weeks just to get better.
It must take its toll on your body, on your headspace, on the family, on you know, the people around you. How who's been the obviously Jeremy, I assume has been a rock for you, But how important it is to have those positive people around you in order for you to maintain your positive mindset. Because I love that you went through that process of you know, I'm not going to give up. I'm not going to plan for the worst.
I'm not going to tell myself that, you know, I'm not going to be hear, how important is it to have those people around you to support you.
Yeah, I got so lucky, so lucky with a little community or village that I had around me. They really allowed me to be me still, and they allowed me to not just be this patient. Obviously they were there for me when I needed that help, especially because chemotherapy does it knocks you, but they also allowed me to do as much as I possibly could, and they allowed me to still be a human, which was so so great and it helped me get through completely. My medical
team was just insane. They were so supportive, Like my surgeon literally left his eighteenth his daughter's eighteenth birthday to come and see me to make sure that I was
okay in hospital one night. Like the things that people did, I don't didn't realize at the time how much I needed it, But now looking back, it's incredible, and I know how much this affects so many more people than just the patient, which at the time, again, you're very much selfish and just trying to get through it, and you think everything's just being like only you're being affected. But now, yeah, looking back, the amount of people that lost their life that year, as well, is just crazy.
The treatment it's in blocks, and after three months is that you just get given the h this isn't and you relapse. That's when you start. That's when you go right, listen.
I had a major surgery and they said there was no evidence of disease, and what did that look like? Antior a lower ultra lower anterior resection. So they removed my inner sphincter, my rectum, my sigmoid colon, and part of my colon, so a whole chunk of my bower basically. Yeah, so they removed that and then they said there's no evidence of disease, which is obviously the words you want
to hear. I wish I got remission. I've never gotten that, but yeah, and then only I had my stoma reversed three months after that, and then in December that year, So a few months later I was relapsed and it was in my lung, it was in my pelverse, it was in my stomach, it was everywhere.
And is it still there?
So I mopped out all up with chemotherapy and radiotherapy. Was doing really well, was really stable. I've never been no evidence of disease since then, but I've been really stable and being able to live a life like an actual life and not being on my deathbed each week like my new oncologists has just managed to. I guess, make sure quality of life is also met, knowing that I'm going to be living with this for the rest.
Of my life likely and what does that look like on a day to day basis.
Yeah, so after the initial relapse, I did a really aggressive chemotherapy again and then just managed it twelve weekly scans and blood tests every fourth three to four weeks and making sure. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones that my cancer is really responsive and my blood will show if something's wrong, so we'll be able to act on that. But yeah, now at the moment, I'm back in chemotherapy, which I said I never would do again.
But it's just oral, just oral chemotherapy, so I'm able to not be in the hospital, so I'm able to be at home. I don't hear the beeping sound, so I've got really bad PTSD from beeping sounds because one of the ways you can do chemotherapy is with a pump that hangs around your neck for forty eight hours.
So I can be home, not in the hospital. But that gives me PTSD and it just sends me into a spiral, and I get side effects that aren't even from the chemotherapy that are presenting because I'm so traumatized from having chemotherapy. Yes, so now I do two week blocks of oral chemotherapy. I'm in a week off at the moment, and then I'll start again on one day and do another two weeks of that chemo for the next six months.
And you you're on this because you've relapsed, Is that right?
Yeah?
And how what does that look like? The relapse is it?
Is it?
Is it an extension or is the chemo treating it? And then it's coming back? What does that look like?
Yeah? So I stopped chemotherapy for a little bit. There was looking at alternate stuff and doing different trials like clinical trials and stuff. But I got pneumonia not long ago, forget all the time, but it just wouldn't go away. So I went I had a scan and it was the three I've got three mets, or had three mets in my lung and they had grown by a really
really small margin. But any growth in my cancer is quite aggressive and needs to I guess be addressed straight away because it's not the original tumor, so's it grows really really quickly, and we don't want it to obviously spread from the lung where it is. That's the only place that is now. So now I'm doing chemotherapy until December, so then I can have a surgery to remove what's left.
And again, if I know this probably a tough question, Kelly, and you know, again excuse me ignorance, but if you didn't go back on chemo, what would that look like as in time wise, because you said it's aggressive, would it be would it be months? Would it be years?
My original relapse, they gave me my option was palliative care, which is about three months, and that was two years ago nearly.
How do you cope with that in your head? Do you just block that out and you just focus on what needs to be done? You just take it day by day, you know, treatment by treatment? How do you run your life in your head?
Yeah? Well, I try not to take it day by day only because I don't want my life to be defined by the disease. Like I know that it's a huge portion of who I am, and I have to be near my doctors I need to be close to a hospital whatever it may be. But I also want I really like pride myself in thriving with cancer. I do everything that I possibly can. I'm still working, I'm still advocating for this disease that i'm quite literally being
treated for. I am still parenting really quite well. I'm doing all the things that a normal parent would do for the most part. And I feel like if I lived each day or day by day, then I'm doing it a disservice, like I'm not. I really, I guess want to make sure that I'm alive for a reason, like I don't want. If I'm alive, I might as well live. I'm living on borrowed time. I need to make the most of it.
Early detection. What are the signs and symptoms of early detection of bow cancer?
Yeah, so obviously, bloody Napoo's a big red flag and not one that should be passed on ever, even some new toilet paper. Just go get it checked out. It doesn't mean it's going to be cancer. But blood is a red flag. It's red for a reason.
Yeah.
But then also, like abdominal pains, change in bower habits that last more than two weeks, unexplained weight loss, unexplained tiredness. If any of these happen, which they can happen so easily, but they if they last I get persist, that's probably where you need to look into it more. If it's persisting more than that two weeks.
And you've you've taken to social media to to to give back uptimately to help raise awareness for this. How's your social media campaign going?
Yeah? Yeah, No. The feedback that I get is just incredible, Like the amount of lives I save, And that sounds so cocky, but the amount of lives that I've saved through simply talking about my own life is just incredible. Like the amount of people that I've gone to get a colonoscopy found poll ups being diagnosed at stage one. One of my daughter's dance friends parents literally went and
got checked and she has stage three bal cancer. Like the fact that me just talking is saving lives or making people I guess second guess whether they're being taken seriously or pushing and advocating for themselves saving their own lives. It's just it really is so incredible. Like it took me a really long time to realize I guess the impact that I'm able to have, but soon I did.
I've just gone full throttle and doing as much as I possibly can while also trying to like nurture and save my own life.
Yeah, exactly focus on yourself or that's very selfish of you. And what does a check up look like?
Yeah, well, I guess it's different for everyone, but your GPS there for a reason. And I know it can be really intimidating to go see a doctor, especially when they are symptoms of being a female generally. But they talk about shit every day like that. That's the uncomfortable part about this disease. But it doesn't discriminate either, which is really frustrating because it doesn't care if you're a young twenty five year old woman that doesn't want to
talk about whoo, he doesn't care. But yeah, I guess seeing a GPS the easiest part. But then the colonoscopy is where you usually get put after that, and that is their prep is shocking. But then you have a nice little sleep and wake up to sandwiches like it's really is a really easy procedure to be having.
And where where are you at right now in your life? Where's your your mindset, where's your vision? Where's Kelly at right now?
Yeah, well, just getting through another about of treatment at the moment. But my daughter actually turned three today, so that's a huge milestone that we've been able to hear.
Wow, congratulations birthday, little one.
And started Kindy and started KINDI, which means that's something called my bucket list that I never thought i'd be well when I was diagnosed, didn't think i'd be here to see and I got taken to a first day of KINDI, which was humane.
I love that you've got the positive mindset like that. That's phenomenal. I love that.
Yeah, now it's just trying to live life as normal as possible, like still planning holidays, still booking weddings and all those things that I still want to see my friends do good and like, yeah, just trying to live as normal as possible while also knowing that my life's really not normal.
Kelly, Thank you ever so much for sharing your story. Your mindset is phenomenal. I love the way that you have this positive outlooking life and cracking on the way you do it is hugely inspirational. And this podcast alone will continue to save lives. So Thank you so much, Kelly, Thank you so much for having me on. Kelly is an ambassador for the Jodie Lee Foundation. To find out more about bow cancer screening and early detection, head to Trust your Gut dot org dot au. Thank you so
much for joining me on Headgame. If you enjoyed this episode, make sure you're subscribed so you don't miss any of our incredible stories and leave me a review wherever you're listening, I'm Att Middleton. Catch you again next time.