Sarah Silverman asks WHY?!

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Handsome Pod. Chatting with friends on the Handsome Pod. Chatting with friends on the Handsome Pod. Cheers. Welcome to the Handsome Pod. we're taking fortune and we're joined by may martin oh my gosh fortune as i look at your beautiful handsome t-shirt i realize i left all of my merchandise In Nashville. No. No. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I'm so bombed. Where did you leave it?

In a Nashville. In a garbage can. In the theater, the hotel. I guess in the theater. Yeah. I think I left it backstage. It looks great on you, Fortune. It looks great. Look, I'm wearing us on my shirt. Thomas, is there a way I can still get merchandise? Oh, yeah, we can send you some. That's what I like to hear. Look at that. Well, I'm wearing this, you guys, because today is a very, very special episode in the Handsome podcast.

Well, my friend, today we are celebrating our 100th episode. What? Can you believe it? That's insanity. I thought we were going to make it past that first April. No, we're at two years in. We've made it past two Aprils. Yeah. Congrats, guys. And we're on shirts.

It's one of my longest, healthiest relationships. I know. And I feel like we just keep getting stronger and better and our communications improved. Yes. Did we have bad communication? Well, we communicate a lot now more than we did two years ago. That's true. We would be good candidates now if we wanted to try. a triad in our lives because we're really good now at like a three-way relationship i think wait what is a triad it's a threesome a throuple yeah that's what a triad is yeah a triad

What about a triathlon? That's something else. We could each take on one different part of the athalon. That is definitely different than a throuple. What's a triathlon again? Biking, swimming, running? Yes. It's all cardio. I don't want to do any of them. No. Can I lift a little weight? You won't be in a triathlon, but you sure can. Yeah, you can stand around and flex. I think you would prefer to be in a throuple than a triathlon. Do you guys, are you surprised by...

How I mean, I'm surprised by not that I didn't know it would be great this podcast, but it's become so big and beautiful. Yes. What a community. Right when I think that it's not as popular or big. Then I go somewhere else. And then I don't know. I don't I I'm shocked every I guess that's all I'm saying. I'm shocked every time. I'm shocked that people listen. Who listens?

And what they get out of it, the different ages, the demographics, all of it. I'm just like, oh, my Lord. It's such a fun treat to unwrap each time.

And how well everybody knows us now. Because in two years, we've all been through life changes and talked about it. And it really is like, I feel like people really... know us it's nice yeah i feel like i know you guys a lot better yeah for sure because when we started this all of us were friends but there were a lot of things we didn't know about each other Yes, yes. And we've had some giggly times. We've had hard times. We've had really hard times. And then we've giggled again.

Yeah. It always comes back to the giggles, which I love. Yes. And then we giggled again. Yeah. I think that's an interesting opening, too. What?

Have we learned about each other that is surprising? Oh, good question. Thank you. Because I would say it's a lot of it is surprising because the podcast was built on, hey, we're all friends in the comedy world, but we don't know. other deeply well but we've enjoyed running into each other in the in the comedy scene and so we've certainly gotten to know each other's you know highs lows quirks and

you know, all of those things. So what is surprising? Okay. What jumps out for me is like, well, we all have our, you know, you have your kind of stage persona or whatever. And I guess I always like fortune.

I would say you're so bubbly and self-deprecating and stuff, but it's been wonderful to also meet this like warrior inside you. Like you are also a very confident, very... astute very driven uh person and and so that's been cool like it's you know what i mean and then tig conversely who you know you you have a high status

Yeah, take it personally. You're just sitting around. You're insecure, not driven. No, there's like a real softness and sweetness that, I mean, I didn't know, I obviously knew that was there, but like.

there's a self-deprecating soft sweetness there as well so i guess it's just the different shades of ourselves that i've you know that we're three-dimensional people i guess yeah yeah and so what did you think what did you think was the one-dimensional part of us well like the like i guess yeah like fortune like self-deprecation and like a goofball yeah and and you're kind of dry dry wet and yeah and and so it's been nice yeah what'd you guys learn about me

Well, you have such a curiosity about things, and you're harder on yourself than I would have ever guessed. Oh. when I met you, you seemed so confident and you are confident, but, um, as we've gotten to know you more, you like riddled with. Yeah. But I do feel like we've, I've seen. like a more mature side of you in the last two years. It feels like you've sort of gotten to know yourself better and are more comfortable in your skin.

And so you're starting to be more confident in as you should. And I've, I've enjoyed seeing a transformation in you or. Yeah, it just feels like you are coming into your own, which I really like seeing. I love that. Yeah. I can, I can, I can, I concur. I also, and this is not at all me thinking that marriage and kids or any of that kind of way of life is for everybody, but I have found it really interesting.

to see you, May, who, I mean, let's be honest, we all know that you can triathlon all over the place, if you know what I mean. But it feels like... in your curiosity and your different paths and journeys and dating and all of that, that I think you've surprised yourself at what you're actually interested in. And what, what, what you might want in life. And that, and I think is also still unfolding, which of course it's unfolding for all of us. But it's been, it's been really.

an interesting thing to watch with you. And, and also Stephanie and I were talking the other day about this side of you. I guess it goes into the curiosity category, but that you. really are an artist that is creating and writing and searching and you just... I would cry. But it's so nice. But, you know, this is a business where people can just start churning things out just for the sake of churning things out. And and of course, you're churning things out, but you do seem to be.

thoughtful and doing it for artistic reasons and that you have so much to say and express and it comes through. you know, writing TV shows or improv or comedy or music now. And that's so nice. That is actually kind of a recent, like, I feel like really in the, in the past year I've been like.

feeling not as constrained by like what medium it takes and and and being like yeah i'll try doing a painting like and finding it really rewarding yeah that's so yeah that's that's the other thing is that you're you're paintings that you've been doing. There's so many different ways that you're expressing yourself. And I just, yeah, I wouldn't have guessed. And then I'm also always intrigued by... how you just blow to shreds what people might expect from somebody who looks like you.

or presents in whatever way and you you just have um uh It is. It's a confidence and a security in your body and your feelings and attractions. And that's another way of expressing yourself. It's, it's all, it's, it's you and it's, it's, it's really an interesting side of you. We can end the episode. Our little cowboy is growing up. It's so nice. That is so nice.

But you can so easily tell yourself stories about who you are, especially if in our jobs, like we're we're narrativizing our own identity so much. And then people are then further boiling it down to write about. you and your work and and putting stuff on you so yeah it's been it's been nice to uh yeah like I I always was like I'm bad at relationships right where I'm like I'm not good at monogamy and things like that and now I'm like

Yeah, it's situational. And yeah, I can really show up for people sometimes. You can. I think you did get in the habit. uh i saw early on with you of you telling yourself you could or couldn't do things yeah and uh believing that and i think you're getting away from that Yeah. Which you should, because, you know, I think like Tig said, you are surprising yourself. Love it. Yeah. I mean, it's, it's really.

really cool. I had a friend. I mean, I guess I still consider her a friend. I just haven't seen her probably in decades. But she was very similar in that, like, man, she could write. I remember she put out an album of instrumental surf punk Sade covers. What? Yeah. Like she was just, she was so, and she would write plays and musicals. She's in like a heavy metal goth band now. She, she's just, she. She has so much to express and it's just pouring out of her.

And I wonder if you should meet her. But anyway. But also trying not to get hung up on like what will sell or what do people want from me next? But like, what do I actually feel called to write? Or yeah, that's so cool. Yeah. But you knew Fortune better than you knew me before, probably.

What surprised you about about old fortune Marie? I mean, I guess I did. But I mean, you know, I feel like we were in each other's orbits very loosely for a decade or more. 15, 10, 15. year or something, but it was really, I mean, I could say, I actually feel like I maybe knew you better because you were working with Stephanie.

you know, doing those shows at the, you know, doing improv together. And so there were, I feel like it was almost an even amount of knowledge of each other. And, but yeah, I think with Fortune. What has really surprised me is the, gosh, this. Are you going to cry? I'm going to cry. No, I'm not going to cry. I'm not going to cry. It's not that kind of thing at all. This is not that deep. No, it's more on the heels of like...

Yeah, like when you were describing yourself as a goofball, you are a very business-minded person. And this might just be the person in me that's not very educated, but I'm always like, gosh, fortune went to school. Fortune knows stuff. Wow. And not that I thought that you were like some dumbass. Right. But you can bring things to a very serious, grounded conversation.

Whether it's, I mean, it's not like we sit around and we talk seriously about history, but I feel like you have that wealth of knowledge as much as you. But also an understanding I have of you, of your upbringing and how you, you know, the instability in your family that you wanted to write for yourself. And I think that's what's so, just so fascinating about getting to know people and like how, what just.

When you understand people better and you're like, oh, they're not actually who I thought they were. Yeah. And then also seeing you right now. I did not. And I hope it's not offensive, but I did not see you rising up from the ashes in the way that you have. And it's really remarkable. And it does give me chills right now because you have been dealt a heavy load and a hard load. And and I just I'm like, I'm pretty floored.

I'm pretty floored. And excited. Oh, thanks. Some people just know they could save hundreds on car insurance by checking Allstate first. Like you know to check that your hand is free of coconut lotion and other products before shaking hands with someone with a coconut allergy.

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Again, that's smalls.com slash handsome. I'm floored and I'm excited because, you know, there's so many. Are you familiar with, aside from like the obvious. like stoicism, you know, like that idea of that theory of stoicism. Like it's something that I. try to follow and and and it's not to be misunderstood as to be you're just stoic and that you don't have feelings but it's like you have control over how you're going to handle what's

handed to you. You can make a decision how this is going to go. And I feel like you have really shown that. Oh, thank you. The rivers run deep. With all of us. And you're right, like you meet someone and you meet them where they're at in the moment. And then you really can only know someone when you understand where they came from and they're. childhood and their teens and it's rare to have two years of talking about that stuff.

you know, in concentrated amounts of time. And you're talking about it on a podcast, but then you're also having a side conversation or, you know, and it's like, hey, this is happening or hey.

you know, here's what's up and how's this, how are we going to deal with this and how are we going to handle this? And, and, and, you know, if I can just loop Thomas into this as well, I've known Thomas for a decade. And man, have I seen this guy grow and change. And I stand by the fact that he is by far the best. best option as a husband or father. Not that he has kids, but I just, you know. And producer and just keeping it together and like championing us. And yeah. kind of shit together.

I've told this many times and maybe I've told it on this podcast or I don't know. But one of my favorite Thomas moments was when I, and I'm sure Thomas is tired of me telling this story, but it really does make him look so cool because he is. I was being interviewed by a TV show on a stage after a show. They came in town, set up a lighting situation, cameras, everything.

legit, legit interview. And they started asking me questions about something that was not at all what I signed up for in this interview. And I said, oh, I'm not wanting to talk about this or that person or whatever. And I just kind of moved on. And they were like, well, but why don't you? And it was like a real gotcha kind of moment where they weren't letting me out. Thomas was my assistant at the time. And he, he walked in front of the camera and he went, this interview is over.

I did not ask him to do it. He took total, like he, he took charge. And pulled the microphone off and he was like, we're leaving. And I just looked back at him. I was like, nicely. done that's incredible god i was so blown away and that's this weird curveball in thomas where it's like he's absolutely a a decent solid dude but he here is the boundary yeah yeah yeah yeah and that that was fun to find out and the protectiveness there that's so nice yeah thank you

Would you do that for me and fortune? Absolutely. Anytime this podcast gets out of hand, I'll step in and stop it. Yeah, this podcast is over. We can't not mention you, Tig, obviously. uh there's so many wonderful qualities um i not that this surprised me but i have so have appreciated the wisdom that you impart uh and not only

on the podcast, but in real life. I think especially in this last year, you know, going through the different things that I've gone through personally, I've had some really great private conversations with you on the phone or on text where you are just a great friend and really show up and and you don't stop it just like you know it'll be okay you like give really amazing advice and check out this book i learned this in my experience i did you know it's just like really thoughtful meaningful um

conversations with you that I've come to really appreciate and that has helped me a lot. So yeah, you just really show up for people. And on the podcast, you impart some really great wisdom. And I know a lot of that comes from a lot of the hard things that you've gone through and coming out the other end of that and seeing you appreciate life. I've not seen anyone. have such genuine appreciation for what you have. Yeah. Yeah. I really, there are so many things.

about your life that I want to emulate or find myself unconsciously like putting on my vision board and

Yeah. Both of you, like meet your heroes. You're both the best. I can't help it. It's so, it's all so nice to hear, but it's also equally as nice to say. And, um, i do appreciate my life and you can kind of it's i think it's human nature to think that you appreciate it and you've got a handle on oh man did I learn my lesson and then life gets going and you completely forget that lesson and and I do that time and time again but I'm very thankful that I have

a well to go back to and straighten myself out and be like man i remember what it was like begging begging to live through a moment or begging please, I just want to have a kid, you know, and, and, or even just to find a partner. And, you know, in those moments, I always say to Stephanie, I'm like, I am crazy about you 99% of the time, but 1% of the time, I cannot stand you. And she's like, same. But I'm...

I do. I appreciate my life. But I actually am also in a point in my life where I feel like I need more guidance. to be even more appreciative because there are things that I cannot believe get on my nerves or that I dread doing. And I'm like, what are you talking about? You are the luckiest person alive and you need to get it together. You know what I mean? Like human nature. I know it is, but like, I really want to focus more energy on.

um i guess gratitude because i am grateful but i would like a heavier dose yeah heavier you're right it's so nice to say this stuff and what in in your regular friendships it's so rare that you like are like, these are all the things I love about you and are, and I'm grateful for it. I want to, I want to do this with all my friends. They'll be like, Oh, I remember when, um, my stepfather who I think I've talked about how talk about stoic in the way of being, you know, just like,

a robot but when my mother passed away i remember him making a toast we had like all of her old friends and our old neighbors and my brother and i had our childhood friends over and our families and stuff and and my stepfather was like This is what she would have wanted when she was alive. And I never did that for her. And I regret it. And, and it was such a moment where I thought. Yeah. Like you should write that letter. You should tell your friend that thing. You should, you should.

have a surprise party for somebody for no reason, you know what I mean? Like, and just feel like, God, I love you, you know? And those are fun little things to, um, to remind yourself to do. Yeah. And I really felt it when my stepfather was making a toast to my mother, you know? Yeah. Yeah. I'm feeling very grateful at the moment because I, I don't know if.

You were wondering where I am, but I'm in my ex-fiance's apartment in Toronto. I had nowhere to record. I have my parents' house and I can't like try to be funny audibly. in the room with that they'd be like listening and being like and so I reached out and she's she's out of town and she told me where the key was and it's just I'm so grateful for it like

And it's so nice to be around objects I remember from when we were together. I love an object and like photographs. And yeah, so I'm grateful for that relationship and with Lindsay. And yeah, I'm not snooping. I'm not going to snoop. All right. Are you typically a snooper? Well, you know, I think that's a yes. I mean, it goes back to your curiosity. It's my, it's my innate curiosity. Your innate curiosity. Yeah. Do a little peekaboo in her.

In her drawers, so to speak. Yes, see what's going on with her current relationship. Is she home right now? No, she's up in Prince Edward County. Her and her partner live most of the time up. in the countryside but do you like your partner place here oh my god yeah the best yeah And this person was at our Toronto show, right? Yes. That's right. Yeah, they both were, and Lindsay's partner asked a question at the live show. Yes, yes. And they're just gems, both of them.

yeah oh that's nice it's yeah it's good that you're friends oh my god yeah oh look at us what a moment of sharing sharing is caring

Yes, 100 episodes in. I guess we have done 101 if somebody is going to start crunching numbers because Thomas did put together one episode that was all of our, what was it, the greatest hits? And then also we did one when we didn't know the format of the podcast yet. We did one with a guest, right? Yeah, we did a couple. One with Brett Goldstein as a guest. And Otsko. Yeah, one with Otsko. Oh, yeah. Do we still have those recorded?

Yeah, they're somewhere. Maybe this will get released one day. Then we were like, oh, my God, it's a nightmare just to schedule us. If we then add another busy person to this, we will not get anything done. That's correct. Yeah. So thank God we pivoted. And we wanted to hog more of the airtime. Yeah, we don't want no guests. Get out of here. We got feelings to share. Yeah, I feel like it works nicely.

our uh it does our our show yeah a little i love all the sharing of i'm i just turned 45 i know it's hard to believe because i wear a lot of cranes And you'd use your DePuffer. I used my DePuffer, but it was a time, and probably because of what's going on in my life, where it just made me very introspective. Just thinking about a lot, but I'm on, I am of the opinion of like, you think nice things about people or you appreciate something about someone like definitely tell them.

And with my mom being sick, that definitely hits home even more. Like you're saying, Tig, about your stepdad having regrets. That's the last thing I want is to be like, I wish I had said something to somebody.

did something differently i just want to i want to move forward deliberately and not not so out to launch you know there's been times where i've just worked so much where i've just been a little out to lunch and i don't want that i want to be very present and uh tell people my life things that you know are important and meaningful and not just and not shy away from stuff yeah

yeah yeah do you in the past have had a tendency to like just keep that stuff private and and just i just went through a period of time where i was just working so much i just wasn't just this like I don't know why I just was like threw myself into that. And this was kind of coasting a bit where I wasn't, I wasn't, you know, connecting with friends like I should and, um, just wasn't taking the time to.

to appreciate some of the smaller things in life and, um, like sitting on a bench, like sitting on a bench. I wasn't sitting on benches and I just want to be more cognizant of, uh, I don't want to be a robot. I don't want to be just like, next show, next show. I got to write this. I got to do this. I don't want that.

I think I told you, and I've probably mentioned it on the podcast, but I just realized I was gone filming. I was touring. And I was just like, yeah, I'm working, making money, sending it home. But it's like, I want to be home with my family doing the activities that they're doing. I want to be. I want to go play tennis. Yeah, I want to go. I want to be there at the baseball game. I want to be everywhere with them. And I came up with like a schedule.

of podcasting, Star Trek, and touring that is really scaled down. Yeah. keeps me working, but keeps me mostly in my life. And it's, it's, I'm so proud of it. I can't even tell you. I'm so proud to have those things in motion. and but not ruling my life you know I feel like I'm still in my like hustler era like I still have this scarcity mentality of saying yes to things but I'm getting better at it and and I'm also I'm

Like I, in my last relationship, I was like, immediately was like, Oh no, I'm happy to just cancel everything and sit in this house. So I know that I have that in me too. So yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah. People used to ask like, Oh, what's your. you know, work-life balance. How do you do that? I'd be like, oh, you know, I'm trying to do this. I'm trying to, and then I realized like, I am lying. Yeah. It wasn't that I was like purposefully lying. It was that I was lying to myself. I had made no.

conscious decisions to shift my life in any way. And it wasn't like I was never home because I would certainly have the ability to stay home for weeks or months at a time. I just wasn't really, really making the decisions that would get the work-life balance in order. Anyway, I'm just so excited. Yeah, that's awesome. Yeah, I'm really, really happy about it. Imagine if this was the first episode of the pod someone listened to. They really emote. They really feel deep. Okay, they like each other.

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If you love comedy, conversation, and hearing famous people get a little too honest, you'll want to check out Armchair Expert. Every Monday and Wednesday, hosts Dax Shepard and Monica Padman sit down with actors, comedians, scientists, really anyone interesting for honest, curious, and hilarious conversations about life.

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For Hulu and Bundle subscribers, terms apply. We do have a question this week. You know, I'll give credit to Thomas. He was like, we had Sarah the first go round. Should we bring her back on on the 100th episode? Because she really kicked us off. in a solid direction a huge way I mean that episode is so ridiculous it's insane it's so great and it's just so perfect yeah because we do love getting ridiculous questions and earnest ones but um and sarah man she can She walks that line really well.

Yes, she does. Have you seen her new specials? Amazing. Oh, it's so good. Yes. Yeah. She is nothing but silly and nothing but like, she's so smart. She's just. I like seeing her out and about in the comedy world. too it's like you see your ears like start smiling always the best yeah yeah well let's hear uh sarah silverman once again asking today's question for the hundredth episode

Hey, handsome. It's me. It's Sarah Silverman. I just wanted to say congratulations on your first hundred eps. That's short for episodes. I'm cool. Also, I have another question. And my question is, why? Why? wow i could apply to so many things but i really relate to that feeling that like Oh, why are we here? Why? Why are we? What is this? What's happening? Stephanie told me that the other day, Finn goes.

I'm so sick of not knowing things. And she was like, what do you mean? He was like, why are we here? Why is there a sun? I just want to know. Oh my god, I felt that panic my whole childhood and teens. Was it Finn who wrote that song? No, that was Max. There was no one knows. We don't know why the world was born. We don't know why we were born. Yeah. How.

How does the world work? We don't know how the world works. It was the sun rises west. The sun goes down east, which is profound. And then we don't know how the world works. Yeah.

Oh man. But no, I really relate to that. I mean, I, I mean, I know it's bad cause it uses water, but I talked to chat GPT quite a bit and I often ask it like, what the hell is going on? And like. is are we in a simulation are we what's going on do you want to hear what chat well i just googled why is the world the way it is you want to hear what it says

Well, yeah, but you're destroying the world a little bit by asking, but go on. I know. Well, that's part of this duality we live in. Like, how do we live in the world and participate in it? when it's such a mess and all the systems are so damaging okay so it says um the world is the way it is due to a combination of natural processes human actions and the inherent nature of reality

From the formation of the earth and the laws of physics to the development of cultures and individual choices, a complex interplay of factors shapes our world. Did that satiate your question? No! Not a lot of just nonsense. It sounds like a robot answered you. Yeah. To be honest. A hundred percent. Yeah. Yeah. And then it. I don't know, you can put on different lenses and see the world in different ways. And at the moment, it really feels overwhelmingly negative, like world wise.

Our capacity for cruelty. We don't know how the world works. We don't know why we were born. You know what my mom said, though? We don't know if we were born. That was my favorite line. We don't know if we were born. Yes. Because, yeah, we don't really have any evidence outside of our own minds that any, like when you close your eyes.

everything could not be there we don't but my mom one time because i was like god it's just there's so much suffering you're just born you're immediately suffering and and my mom was like but we don't know what the alternative is like being is better than not being as far as we know and i was like that's true i guess i'd rather be than not be but yeah that's a good point yeah i don't dig too deep into all these kind of questions you don't know

Why? Because you know it would drive you nuts? I just that some things can't be answered. So I don't drive myself crazy trying to figure it out. Right. And maybe that's a little, you know. uh turning a blind not not to big important things but just these like more philosophical questions right i don't i don't dig too deep into that right

Yeah, you got to let those questions sit loosely on your shoulders because really you got to get up and have breakfast and have a shower and live your life. When I was a kid and... I've probably mentioned this before, but like I used to really, really think that if I. grabbed a pack of smokes, headed off into the woods and sat on like a little rock, like a, you know, boulder, I could really figure out the answer to. Yeah, like Siddhartha, like the Buddhist.

He sat under the lotus tree. I really thought I was going to come up with the answer to how the world works and why we're here and what this is all about.

I never did, unfortunately. But I have to say, one of my big whys that's going on for me right now is, and I guess I... I guess the answer to my big why would be going directly to specific people and sitting down and asking them why. But I've had... A handful of friends that have really veered off from what I thought was similar thinking, socially, politically, and they've really veered off.

And I think part of my why is also, why didn't you just share that you were heading off in a different direction? Like why? Because everybody is kind of left wondering, why? What happened? Like, what? Why? It goes back to the why. And it could be. a different feeling if somebody was like, hey, this is kind of weird, but I didn't feel this way before.

And here's what's something in me has really shifted. And not that I'd be all for that, but it would be more understandable. You know, you would think that they if if their convictions had really changed. And you're their friend. You'd think that they would come to you. But they'd want to share that. And they'd say, hey, I think you got it wrong and come with me. Like, that they don't ever do that. Do you think they're aware that they've shifted so much?

Yes, I do. Yes, I do. I was in Nantucket. I was having my brunch at the hotel restaurant or whatever. And it was just one other table next to me. And I didn't have my phone with me or anything. So I was just listening to their conversations. And it was like a cartoon of like, they went through everything from like.

trans people are bad like you know women are dumb like every immigration like they went through everything they were just they were getting revved up it was this like three couples uh sort of older couples and they were But I was like, what's going on here? Because they were really enjoying, they were fueling each other and they were, but they were really connecting over it and being like, God, it's hard. It's so hard. They were like.

they them like it doesn't make sense like god it's just it's hard it's just hard and they were like and i was like where is this coming from because i could feel their like panic or fear yeah it's wild because it's on like in what way does that affect them at all completely yeah and they always and you can always hear them be like Oh, yeah, it doesn't make sense. You know, if someone called me, they tell them where they could stick it. And it's like, you just did it. You just said that.

Then, yeah, I felt like that they were finding community over it, too. And so I guess it is just like these things come in waves and cycles and like maybe it's the same existential. fear that we're all feeling and that there's people's solution is just to build up their walls and grab what's theirs. And you know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, because it is true. It's like if I had a major shift.

in in the way I was going about my life and of course people have shifts and you change the way you're thinking and you change I mean even down to comedy like look at Sarah Silverman I mean she the her material has shifted so much over the years, you know, where she's even had moments of saying like, oh, hey, this didn't age well. But she's keeping you in conversation. Like, oh, I've learned this. I've changed. I've gone in this direction. Or, oh.

I said this the wrong way or I apologize or I do it better now. Or I'm, you know, like she, she really keeps you in conversation. Yeah. And, and then there are, like I said, if, if I. made a massive shift and did not fill in anybody on where this came from. And I just went with it so far away from where. I was planted with the people I was growing with, you know, and again, it's like, it's a, it's, it's okay to change and it's okay to.

to say that you have different ideas or that, you know, but just like, why? Where? What? Like, give us some more information. Stay in conversation. I know. The fact that it, like Sarah's series, I Love You America, was, she was really talking to people. And it's like, I know the work shouldn't fall on us to always. build bridges and but um often when you when you do engage in conversations with people who yeah whose thoughts on human rights and things like are so different from your own

They do come around. They haven't. But then there are, like I'm saying, people that you thought were on that side of things and then that you see them drifting away and with no. they're not staying in conversation. I would want to explain myself. If I was seeing the light, I thought, that was so different. From the world I was in. Yeah, I guess I can compare it to veganism. If you want like a comparison, it's like.

I saw the light. You can think I'm weird. You cannot follow what I'm doing, but I'm going to talk you through how I got here. And I know it's very different, but I'm just I'm saying that. people make massive shifts and, and just, but just explain what, what happened. Like what, where is this coming from and what sent you in that direction? Yeah. Cause the fact that they are, that.

people are reluctant to do that makes it seem like there is some awareness somewhere or shame about it. Shame. Yeah. That they are aware that, that they are. punching down or or you know yes if you slither away quietly there is shame there's shame there is shame there is shame if you are slithering away there is shame

Well, it's the same like when people break up and they can't talk to you about it. Or if you've ever been ghosted or broken up with where it's just like, this isn't working. Often they... they can't talk about it because they know yeah well yeah I had an experience with somebody recently where there was some weirdness in the air and I was like I'm gonna go up and just say hey

There's some stuff going on, obviously. Would love to talk to you about it. And she was kind of defensive and weird. And we were in this like group situation and she avoided me. the rest of the time. And I thought, if somebody came up to me and said, I'd like to talk to you, I would follow back up with that. I would be like, hey, so what is it that's going on? You know, what was that? I would not slither away.

I think not everybody's capable of that emotional level of, you know, communication. Yeah. I just, I walked away from that going, man, like why, why on earth? Would you slither away and avoid me if there wasn't any shame in there? And I guess part of it, like, I think I take responsibility too for sometimes the, you have to make an.

which I think you do take, but in general, like we have to make it an environment where it's safe to ask questions and safe for people to express themselves, you know, and not feel like they're going to immediately get called. you know a bigot because they don't understand they them you know like we gotta well yeah in this particular grace

Yeah, totally. Oh, my God. Yeah. Like in this particular conversation, I truly went out. We were like kind of giving each other awkward smiles like, hi, because there was obviously something to discuss. And then that's when I was like. Hey, so I'd love to talk to you about the, you know. Elephant in the room. Yeah. And slither, slither, slither. So anyway.

That all goes back to why? Why? Why? Stop slithering. There's been a lot of whys, I think, since COVID times. I was thinking about that today, just like. This pre and post COVID world things just so significantly shifted. Yeah, they really did. And it would have been nice if it was a moment where. that would have not unified us as human beings. And it does feel like people just went to their little caves and...

went online and got radicalized a little bit sometimes. Yeah, got into podcasts. Just started taking in podcasts and stopped talking to people. But keep on doing that. Keep supporting the show. Yeah. Glad you listen. And, um, Sarah does not have a followup. Um, answer when i asked her no i was hoping she she doesn't have answers for us she said that it's just it's like it's an open-ended why it's for everything and anything which i think is

It's perfect. That works. Very timely. And I will say, I really admire that about Sarah, her fluidity in terms of her, yeah, and transparency about her journey as a person. I hope I do that. Yeah, I just think we should all aspire to just as we get older, because no doubt younger generations, there are going to be things that I do not understand or that I immediately feel.

defensive there's there's all kinds of things probably now and uh yeah it's we gotta keep talking to young people and keep learning and talking to people and yeah yeah And we got to keep being silly at times, too. Oh, for fuck's sake. That's all we have. And have some levity. Because we're going to have a lot of whys and a lot of...

And a lot of frustrations and keeping it, you know, obviously these things are important and you got to take them seriously, but also taking time to, to let the air out of the tires for a minute.

Oh my gosh, 1 million percent. I hear from people all the time how thankful they are for just like a break from the insanity of life and the silliness and the singing and the... fortune marie and the mayfax and all of it it's like you know there's obviously plenty of news stations you can go and drain your energy into but like We'll touch on things from time to time, but in general, you know, this is a nice place for us to go. This is where you hear about being a pineapple apart. That's right.

I really, for my own brain, really appreciate it. Yeah, Ghost. Yeah, Ghost. Ponties galore. Checking out those gams. Motor boating. Motor boating, my friends. Cooters. Cooters galore. Cooters and hooters. Cooters and hooters and pooters. You need to start your own. Or maybe we could, as a trio, start Cooters and Hooters. Cooters and Hooters. Put it on the list. Well, yeah, put that on the list. That list that we haven't...

We will get to it. We will get to it in our retirement. You know what? I was watching a documentary about the Beach Boys with my mom last night. And my mom goes, God, their harmonies are amazing. And then out of nowhere, she doesn't listen to the pod. I don't know where she goes. you know, you and Tig and Fortune should do harmonies, like do like a barbershop quartet. And I went, have you heard our theme song? And she was like, no. So I went on YouTube and I played.

the theme song and she was like oh wow so that's one thing we've checked off the list yeah what's what's a three person Triad. A triad? All right. Triathlon. Triathlon. That's a long-term throuple. Is it triathlon? Yeah, a triathlon. Yeah, yeah. That's like if you really... On your deathbed, you're holding hands with two people. You did a triathlon. Yeah. All right. Well, that was a really... special episode it was yeah so uh full of emotion so introspective lots of philosophical wonderings

Stay in conversation. Yeah. So was our hundred episodes. Congratulations, you guys. Yeah, congrats. And thank you, Mr. Thomas, for steering the ship. Yeah. Thank you for everyone that's listening to this. Thank you. Awesome pod because we get as much joy doing it as you guys have told us you get from listening to it. We really do. And thank you guys for me. It's a privilege to produce this show. And I feel like this.

you know, the podcast spreads so much joy and to participate in that is really meaningful for me. So thank you all. So why do we do this podcast? Oh, to spread.

Joy. Handsome joy. Yeah, yeah. Well, speaking of spreading handsome joy, I'm going to tell you where I'm spreading my handsome joy if you don't mind. Please. West Hampton Beach Performing Arts Center in West Hampton Beach, New York, August 17th. Provincetown Town Hall in P-Town, Massachusetts, August 23rd. Beau Rivage Resort and Casino, Biloxi, Mississippi, September 27th. Also go to tignotaro.com to see when I'm working out my new material at Largo, Dynasty Typewriter, and Comedy Bar.

Bouncing back and forth between Toronto and Los Angeles. What do you have going on, my friends? I got nothing live for a little while. So yeah, you can listen to my music or I'm gearing up to launch something very cool. I'll probably talk about it a bunch more, but I'm going to launch like a...

I do these animal paintings. I'm launching an online store, selling the animal paintings, and 100% of the proceeds go to charity, and I'm excited about that. That'll be launching in the next week or two, I think. Stay tuned. That's because you can't stop expressing yourself. I just can't stop. Can't stop, won't stop, don't stop. Can't stop, won't stop. Can't stop, won't stop, yeah. What about you, Fortune? I'm going to Iceland soon, August 8th.

in Reykjavik. I'm doing a show there for their pride. So if you live in Iceland, check that out. And then San Antonio and Houston, Norfolk and Richmond and DC. Burlington, Vermont, Atlanta, Cincinnati, Chicago, Salt Lake City, fortunepeamster.com for those tickets. Well, there you have it. Please.

Should we say share this episode? Maybe not this one. As the first episode that you share. Share your favorite. Start with Sarah Silverman's first episode with us. Yes, yes, yes. Where she asks about cleaning. undercarriages. Yes, that's right. Solid episode. There's so many great ones. Share one with a friend or family member and bring them on into the handsome fold. And keep chatting to each other on the Facebook page, the Reddit page.

sending us questions for the the pretty little episodes and we love to hear get your merch look at this fun handsome shirt right here You can see that on YouTube. It's one of the coolest merch in the biz. Head on over to YouTube and see handsome fortune face in a handsome t-shirt. Well, you guys are awesome. What a joy and treat to do this with you. Ditto. Yes, it is. Kisses. Happy 100th. You both look 150. Happy 100. All righty. Until the next time. Keep it handsome.

Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tig Notaro, and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Ouellette. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com. And please follow us on social media at handsomepod. What a podcast! What a podcast! What a podcast! That was a HeadGum Podcast.

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Hey, I'm Gareth Reynolds, and I have a new podcast on HeadGum called Next We Have. Now, this show is for people with short attention spans, which is everyone. I mean, you're probably trying to skip this ad right now, but don't, because you now legally have to listen to the show. That's how law works.

Next we have is very simple. Each episode has three short segments. For instance, Lisa Gilroy and I write insane revenge Yelp reviews for callers who had bad experiences with a business. The Doughboys play a game called Meal or No Meal. And Steph Tolov and I go head to head. on a thought-provoking game called Guess That Sound.

The show is as dumb as it sounds, and we probably have more fun than we should. But it's a great time, and you should listen or watch new episodes of Next We Have every Thursday on YouTube or your favorite podcast app.