This is a HeadGum Podcast. Checking Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance is smart. Unfortunately, not checking that your phone is charged before leaving the house is not smart. Like I learned the hard way when I found myself driving to a new place with no GPS and no charger in my car. Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate.
Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. All state North American insurance company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Pretty little episode. Welcome to a pretty little episode of the Handsome Pod. I'm one of your hosts, Mae Martin. And I'm your other one of your hosts, Fortune Feimster. How are you doing? I'm doing great. You look great. Thanks, pal. You're home from your adventure. I think you're home early. Yeah.
I'm not, I'm going to go. I think I'll go back. I just, I arrived seven minutes ago and like raced in and found my podcasting gear. I gotta say, it feels good to be back around all my objects and my things. Oh, that means you love your house. I do love my house, yeah. That's a nice feeling when you have a homey situation. Yeah, but I loved it up there too.
Yeah. Are you having any time for yourself these days? No. Sweet fortune. No, never. Never. I'm having a little time for myself here and there. Yeah. Where I've been going back to North Carolina quite a bit. Technically it's, you know, for my mom. Yeah. But I'm technically not working except for like. our pod and my radio show on there. But it's been nice to like, spend a lot of time with my family and with my mom and then just being in my hometown is really cute. Very grounding.
Yeah, but I'm about to get crazy busy again. I know. Yeah. I'm doing a new TV show. And this one's with Will Ferrell and Molly Shannon. Two of the greats. So the 15, 16, 17 year old me, I mean, I'm dying right now because I love them both, but they were, I told Will, I was like, y'all were like my SNL cast when I was in high school.
I'm like, I did your bits for my tennis team and my friends. And he's like, I'm going to garnish your wages for the first episode. Pay me back for all those bits. I go do it. Yeah. I think I'm going to also get in better shape because I play a caddy. It's a golf show. Yeah. And I will be carrying around. There's no way around it. I'm going to be carrying a real golf bag with golf clubs. Yeah, they're not going to make like foam golf clubs. I'm going to be sore as a motherfucker.
You're going to be a caddy. Like you're actually going to be a caddy. Yeah, because there's no golf. This isn't it's it's no golf cart situation. It is walking golf courses. I will be having to lather up in sunscreen. Yeah. And my arm. my arm strength is going to be mighty. Yeah. I'm excited about that. It would be fun. Imagine getting a part where you have to really specifically train to do something like, you know, that clip of, um, is it Michelle Pfeiffer as cat woman? And she just,
takes her whip and she with like amazing precision whips the heads off all these mannequins. Yeah, that was cool. To have a reason to learn the whip. That'd be great. That would be great. Mine's just going to be to carry a bag. Yeah, right. So not the best skill, but A skill. If anything, it's more practical than a whip. I wonder if I'll learn to play golf in the process. Do caddies play? Caddies are like crazy knowledgeable. They're the ones that are telling the golfers. They're like a coach.
Really? Yeah, they're the ones that are like, you need to use this club. They're giving them advice. They're like very well versed in golf. I didn't know that. Yeah, it's not just a... level i mean at least at the pro level it's not just like a kid being like here's your golf club sir yeah it's not like the ball boys at tennis games no these guys can make like
They make like a percentage, I think, of your payday. So if you win like, say, some big-ass prize, they could get like a million bucks or something. Oh, really? Mm-hmm. They get a percentage of your... prize at the high level yeah whoa because these guys are like in in demand golf pros like connoisseurs
Yeah. And your caddy can like make or break your entire game. When I was like 13, I saw The Legend of Bagger Vance in movie theaters with my friend Nicole. And we were, I mean, totally sober, hadn't... discovered weed at that point. And I got this hysteria laughing every time they said the words bagger bands.
Just the idea of the legend of Bagger Vance just was crack. I couldn't, I was crying. And then we got told off by other people in the movie theater to be quiet. And that really like cemented our friendship. And then I, she passed me her Coke and it.
dropped but it was in one of those movie theater things with the lid on it and it didn't spill and then the fact that it hadn't spilled I don't know to us was just like the funniest thing I don't know you know when you're that age and you're just like You're just so simpatico with someone and you can't stop giggling about everything. Yeah. Everything that happens, you just immediately lock eyes and cry laugh. Oh, yeah. Love that. Your show is coming out soon, right?
Yeah, and I'll see Nicole, actually, because she was my friend who got sent to one of these troubled teen institutes. So she was a consultant on the show. Wow. And she'll come to the premiere and stuff. Yeah. And when does that come out? Oh, the premiere is September 9th, and then it comes out September 25th. Oh, my gosh. I know. It's crazy. I kind of think what I'm going to wear to all these events. Oh, yeah. Something snazzy. You know I'm in my tank top era.
Are you going to wear a tank to the premiere? I've got to find a way to dress up a tank. I think I'll just wear a suit with a tank under it. Well, you of all people can pull it off. Thanks. Thanks, man. I actually could watch it right now if I wanted to. It is in because I work for Netflix on the radio show. I have all this preview content in my Netflix. And they gave you my show?
Yeah, it's in there. What are you talking about? That's crazy to me. That's so vulnerable because no one's seen it yet. Well, I haven't watched it yet, but I won't. I'm going to watch the whole thing. I'll watch all of Feel Good. Thank you. What if you watch it and you notice that I've like... stolen lots of things you said from the pod and it's all in the dialogue. I wouldn't remember. Yeah, that's true. I remember half the stuff I say. The best was when Thomas was like,
hey, people seem to really like that character, Amelia, that you did. And you're like, sorry? Wait, what? What did I do? I got to go back and listen to that because I'm still fuzzy on what I did. Yeah. But apparently it was a big hit. Big hit. Yay, me. Yay. That's probably why Will Ferrell saw it. And he saw Amelia, the character. He was like, get this girl in my show now. Yeah.
Yeah, sometimes they put stuff in my previews like a week before. Sometimes it's a couple days before, but yeah, this one is a month before. That's crazy. Mm-hmm.
So I hold so much power. You do. It's really scary. But no one can go on my Netflix and just watch it. You click on it and they text you a code. Yeah, yeah, because it's on my Netflix right now. So I've been... trying to resist just putting it on but it's so thrilling to see the like the netflix logo and then the yeah i bet well it's a it's hard to get any show made and this is now your second
Yeah, I'm pumped. And my dad's in it. He plays a puppet maker in one scene. He doesn't have a line, but he is featured in one episode. Pretty. You know, he's on screen for a good 20 seconds. Oh, I love that. Yeah, with his puppets. And so he's coming to the premiere and he was like, should I bring a puppet to the premiere? Perhaps on the red carpet, I could bring my puppet Zoltar. What did you say?
I was all for it. No, I'm into it. I'm like, I want a spinoff show about the puppet man. Oh my God. So funny. Well, look at you getting dad in there. Got to. He's a star. You brought your mom on Kimmel when you were hosting. You got to do it. What's the point otherwise? Yeah, we got to give our people some fun adventures.
Totally. You can't be the only ones doing this crazy Hollywood stuff. It's more fun when there's someone you know and love around you as well. I'm excited today because apparently... After our impassioned plea for people to ask advice questions, a lot of people have sent in advice questions. That's right. So today's questions are all going to be advice. What do you think they're going to be?
be oh i don't know but i feel well equipped to handle 90 of these do you what would be out of your remit like i guess if it was a really sucking these I don't know how to do that, y'all. So ladies, if you're asking, I'm not answering because I don't know. If people... have sent in questions about how do i best as a d i'd be shocked but yeah you'd have to take that one bud and be like uh i i i've said it before i touched one wiener And I grabbed it like a hot clarinet. Just like this. Just.
I don't want to grab it for too long, you know. I bet that that is someone's specific kink, though. There's some man out there that's like, I don't know how to ask my girlfriend to touch my dick like a hot clarinet. They look at me and I go, sorry. Sorry, boys. Sorry. You can think it and dream it, but it's never going to happen. I want you to play the caddy like that. It's never going to fucking happen because I'm gay as a effer.
Well, on that note, should we get to one of the questions? Hey there, Tig, May, and Fortune. It is Annalise from Vermont. Huge, handsome listener. Obviously, like many of us, but you three really bright up my day every time I listen to you. And this is why I'm asking for some advice right now. I am wondering. How you get out of imposter syndrome. I'm assuming maybe the three of you have felt that in times of your careers.
Yeah, I feel like I'm in a pivoting point in my career and I'm looking to change things up, get my own business going. And imposter syndrome has been really keeping me. I don't know, stagnant. So what the hell do I do with that? I love your advice. Thank you so much. And I have no answer because, yeah, looking for advice on this one. Thank you. So much love to you. And Elise from Vermont. Great question.
And imposter syndrome, it's pretty much just feeling like at any minute someone's going to figure out that you don't know what you're doing, right? Like everyone else knows how to do things and you're just freestyling.
yeah that you're not qualified to be there that somehow you got tapped too early yeah a thing that was a turning point for me was like living with a child and being even even temporarily in a semi-parental role like a caregiver role yeah because I was like oh my god I'm a child myself like I don't know what I'm doing and then you kind of realize all parents are
Just figuring it out. Yeah, like you don't suddenly become an adult and we're all teenagers pretending like this performance of maturity. Yeah. And so maybe, yeah, just realizing that everyone has the same feeling. Have you had it? I don't have it often, but I've had it because, you know, you always feel a little out of your league in certain things. I think I had the first maybe half of my first season that I did The Mindy Project because it was my first series regular role.
i had only i had done chelsea lately but it was just like sketches and stuff like that and i had done a couple pilots but this was my first like oh you're like on the show yeah acting there's no one you know This isn't the time to ask questions. These are professionals, high level writing. And it was my first, yeah, like big acting gig. So I kind of just had to like.
You know, luckily I knew like the basics. Yeah. But I just had to kind of watch to be like, you know, figuring out the lingo and stuff on set. what to do you know when you mess up a take or yeah i just i just was kind of quiet and just observing for a long time and then and then got the hang of it probably maybe six episodes in um but yeah
For that early part, I was just like, I don't know what I'm doing here. I want to go watch those first six episodes and see the fear in your eyes. Just a slight look to the side. I'm sure I looked down the barrel of the camera. a couple times. Oh, for sure. Checking Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance is smart.
Unfortunately, not checking that your barbecue has enough propane is not smart. Turns out when you have the whole neighborhood over for a cookout, they expect the food to be, you know, cooked. Yeah, checking first is smart. So check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate.
Potential savings vary subject to terms, conditions, and availability. All state North American insurance company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois. Yeah. So like that's why now if I have any, anyone that I know, like.
doing their first big acting gig i'll call them up and be like okay here's what this means yes this is like this and this is like you hit your mark and do this and this is the lighting and this is what will happen here just because you know that no one teaches you that stuff in an acting class i think there's it's like a balance where a you have to be confident enough to ask questions and maybe find like your your anchor like find a person who you can confide in
early and say, Hey, listen, I don't really know what I'm doing. But like, yeah, so that but then also, my tendency is to say to everyone, I don't know what I'm doing. And then that has a bad effect. I wouldn't do that. Yeah. I wouldn't do that. I get this like low status, like even show running on set. I'm like, I don't know. It's like, I don't really feel that. It's like a defense mechanism, but.
Yeah, maybe not making it your comedic angle that you're like a newbie, but finding one person that you trust that you can be like. I think it is a fake it till you make it kind of thing you have to do without overcompensating. Yeah. Where you're like, oh, I know everything. Don't do that. But be like open to like suggestions because you know that you don't, instead of being like, I don't know if someone's.
you know, got an idea of like, Oh yeah, that's great. You know, just being kind of open to other people's leading the way and you're just kind of following and observing, but also being, you know, a participant to the.
extent that you can and probably you're more qualified to be there than you think of course some of this is just mental and doubting yourself and uh i would say have confidence in yourself yeah somebody hired you some yeah yeah 100 i think i wonder if it's different if you're like a surgeon you can't really fake it till you make it that one though because it requires tons of training to get to a human yeah
But yeah, in other scenarios that aren't life or death, you can fake it till you make it and just believe in yourself. I like what you're saying about like immerse yourself in the experience. really be social talk to people don't just be on your phone you know or eat your lunch alone because you're nervous like yeah get amongst it and then you'll feel see how other people are doing it that you think are doing a good job kind of emulate them
Do you think, did Annalise give her answer or because it's advice? She did not. She just wanted that advice. And I think we gave her pretty solid advice. Annalise, you got this. Yeah, you got this. You go rock it in Vermont and show them what's up. Yeah. The newspaper headline tomorrow is a woman pretending to be surgeon causes mayhem in local hospital. That's right. All right. Who's next? Thomas.
hey fortune-tagan may my name's ash pronouns they them i was just listening to your recent pretty little episode where you're saying no one's asking you for advice so i find myself in the current situation of having Lots of long distance friendships after moving states. And assuming, you know, all of you travel around quite a bit and hopefully you have friends, what do you do?
to maintain long distance friendships? What have you found most helpful? Thanks. Great question. Ash, that definitely happens, especially the older you get. Yes. And living in, like I've lived in. three different time zones and so i have groups of friends that i but i like like what you did recently going to iceland with an old friend it's like the friendships you want to invest in carve out serious one-on-one time with those people
it's so rare that you have a solid like four days with someone, but then that could, that's more than like, you know, a year of coffees with someone that lives around the corner. Like, yeah, that's sort of what I do. Like going up to this. cottage and I had like Lisa Gilroy came up for a couple days and it's like so rare that you get a couple days with someone and then you fill up your cup. Yeah, I've got a lot of long distance friendships just from moving here from North Carolina.
And people in college going to different states to live. One of my, the friend I went to Nashville with, I mean, Iceland with, she moved to Nashville a few years ago. That was so jarring because we we've been best friends for many years now. And just, you know, you get kind of spoiled that, you know, your friend's just like 15 minutes away, but you kind of take it for granted.
And then when they leave, you're like, oh, I should have done more with my friend. But it's nice when it's a friend that allows you some grace because everyone's busy. If it's a friend who's like... Always making you feel guilty for like not keeping in touch. That friendship's not going to go far. Totally. Because everyone's busy and everyone's got a life.
My friend's a mom and she works. If I were to be like, I never hear from you. What are you doing? You don't care about me anymore. She'd be like, what? Like maybe, maybe you get one of those. Yeah. But you know, you gotta just. be okay with not talking for a bit and then like having the best time catching up at some point. Yes. So giving you the grace for sure. Yeah. The worst is like a newer friendship where then they very quickly are like, Hey, I'm.
feeling kind of bummed that we haven't seen each other in a few weeks and i'm like oh no i hate that this has got no future because like yeah yeah yeah we're all at capacity i've had a couple people like that where you're like oh this could be a cool friend and then guilt trip like week three and you're like oh no thank you a hundred percent yeah so um so that's a big one but you know
checking in once in a while texting like it's so easy to be like thinking of you or hope things are good or you know making a point to call on the phone even if it's like once a month yeah the thing is you're never gonna keep in touch with them to the extent you would if you were in the same city but there are plenty of ways to like keep the connection yeah and and definitely i think if there's a handful of people you really want to
invest in then planning little trips or going to visit them then you get that concentrated amount of time even if it's just one night like yeah yeah when I go on tour I We'll try to see different friends in cities, like, having a dinner. Yeah. I know I won't see them for, like, another year. We'll check in here or there, and that's okay. Yeah. But the friends are fun. They should not be...
And just one zip code. Yeah. You heard it here. There you go. Thanks, Ash. Should we squeeze one more? Let's squeeze that in. Yeah. That's what she said. Hi, handsome. My name is Emma. Similar to May, I'm an adult without a driver's license. And I've actually recently failed my driving test two different times. And I think it's partly because the tension with the test examiner is like really getting to me.
And so I'm looking for your advice on the best thing to say when the test examiner gets in the car the next time I try to take the test again to kind of break that tension. Love the podcast. Hope you can help me out. Thanks, guys. Maybe put on our podcast in the car. Blast a podcast. Blast them singing. But also.
So this is going to be the same examiner? Like, could you not go to a different... I think there needs to be another one. I think so. I think you're stuck in a rut with this person. Yeah, I think they've got bad energy. It's their fault. It is their fault. You haven't done anything wrong, Emma. Yeah. If we were testing you, you'd be passing every time. I mean, first off, I would maybe practice a little bit before taking that test. So you feel more comfortable, right?
Definitely. You're probably in your head a little bit at the moment. Yeah. Thinking, ah, I keep failing this test. Maybe you call it out, name the feeling. You go, oh, I was thinking about what to say to you when you get in the car because... You know, third time lucky. Like you go, oh, I'm feeling the tension a little bit. Although I guess depending on how you phrase it, you could, it could sound like you're coming onto them. Being a creep. Yeah.
Do you feel that tension? I keep failing, so I'll see you again. Yeah. Maybe don't say that. You could cut this tension with a knife. I say just keep practicing a little bit before your next test. So you know you got the skill behind you. And then when you're in the car, just try not to focus on the tester. Focus on the road. Focus on the road. Focus on the road. You know, get your hands up.
Where do they go? 10 and 2? I thought it was 10 and 2. Someone recently told me it's changed to... Is it 9 and 3? To 9 and 3 or something. Oh. I think it's 10 and 2. I'm going to keep... 10 and 2? Yeah, I can see 9 and 3. Sometimes I go down to... What would this be? Seven and five? That's dangerous. That's when your hands are resting on your lap, basically, right? Focus on the road. Don't focus on this person. They don't matter other than they're going to decide whether or not you pass.
Well, in following that logic, maybe there is a world where you butter them up a bit. Like they are obviously power drunk. They failed you twice. You got some M&Ms. Yeah. Or you go. God, I'm so glad I got you again as my tester. I was worried it would be someone else. Yeah, well, ego boost. Yeah. Okay, I don't hate that. You go, because you know my driving, you're going to notice.
how much better I am this time. And what if the person's like, what are you talking about? I never met you. Yeah, it wasn't me. I do about 30 of these a day. Yeah, it's not that deep. Emma, good luck to you. I believe in you. May believes in you. Yeah. We know you got this. And they say third time's a charm. Totally. So you got this, my friend. But even if it tastes...
It takes five times. Like you don't have the muscle memory. You're like me. You're a grown adult. Yeah. So give yourself a break. That's right. Okay. That was fun. I like the advice. The advice is fun. Advice is good. Yeah. I love it. Please keep submitting your questions and advice requests to speakpipe.com slash handsomepod. Give us the questions. Give us what advice, anything you want. We're here for you. Yeah, we'll teach you how to S&D.
mine will all be made up advice which also could be fun yeah you gotta first you gotta warm your hands yeah you gotta put on some mitts Warm those hands because, you know, nobody likes a cold, shocking touch. Except I'm sure someone does. Someone does. There's someone for everyone out there, Mae. You're right. Dunk your hands in ice.
Yeah. Well, you never know what you'll get here, but we're glad you tuned in and we love it. We love hearing from you and we love being a part of the handsome pod community. That's correct. So check out our regular episode. Next week. And until then, keep it pretty handsome.
Handsome is hosted by me, Mae Martin, Tig Notaro, and Fortune Feimster. The show is produced, recorded, and edited by Thomas Ouellette. Email us at handsomepod at gmail.com and please follow us on social media at handsomepod. What a podcast! What a podcast! That was a HeadGum podcast. checking allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds on car insurance is smart unfortunately not checking that your freezer door is closed is not smart
I had to learn to enjoy ice cream soup, but my frozen tater tots were tragically unsalgivable. Yeah, checking first is smart, so check Allstate first for a quote that could save you hundreds. You're in good hands with Allstate. Potential savings vary, subject to terms, conditions, and availability. Allstate North American Insurance Company and affiliates, Northbrook, Illinois.