To whoever finds this: This is The Guy Friends. Our overlord Kate Dries, The Fair & Mighty, has sent us away so that she and Lauren could do the annual Kate Friends Podkate, in which they turn the tables and answer questions from our male listeners. It is very dark where we are. We can hear digging. It sounds like an animal is doing the digging. Their manifesto is likely to contain questions from men across the globe. Questions about commitment. Questions about rom-com-esque last-minute airp...
Aug 14, 2013•21 min
In this episode: A listener wants to know whether it's OK to re-wear lingerie... Was it ever not OK??? The Guy Friends apparently have no idea what is considered "proper" or "clean," but we do understand what constitutes a healthy interest, versus a financial burden. And how much should you acknowledge your pre-date Googling on the date itself? Is mentioning your date's love of the early Jerry O'Connell vehicle Sliders worth the following silence as he wonders whether you'll be crafting fun and ...
Aug 09, 2013•21 min
In this episode: A listener finds herself in the Friend Zone... with a guy who pays for their frequent dinner dates. iQué horror! What does one do about repeated intimate-but-platonic hangouts, served with a side of boyfriend behavior? Should she wait longer for this pot to boil? Or should she pursue her just deserts? (Side note: it turns out that this idiom is totally spelled with one "s" ) And a question from within the Guy Friends Podcast Studios , as our own Lauren ponders the age-old conund...
Jul 31, 2013•22 min
In this episode: Yet another listener has a dude who is reluctant to go down on her! THANKS, OBAMA. Is he yet another Excusey von Bullshit ( of the Hertfordshire von Bullshits ) like the ones we've described in episodes past ? Or are his concerns about having a cold sore and wanting to protect her vagina from HSV1 a legitimate alibi? To this very day, the Guy Friends still can't figure out the transmission logic behind herpes simplex, but they try their durnedest. SIDE NOTE: IF YOU HAVE EVER USE...
Jul 19, 2013•22 min
In this episode: The Guy Friends take on the least sexy phrase in Early Modern through Millennial Englishes: "joint checking account." When ought one enjoin their exchequery with that of another? More to the point: WHY. WOULD YOU EVER??? They've risked almost everything for love, but can The Guy Friends bring themselves to risk... debtors' prison??? Diversify your portfolios; it's going to be a financially prudent ride, yielding modest, gradual gains over decades!!! "When the bride's wearing whi...
Jul 11, 2013•21 min
It’s the Guy Friends Podcast: Party Crashing Edition! We’ve elbowed our way into countless conversations so that we could give you advice. Listen in, or else we’ve ruined everyone’s night for nothing. In this episode: A Diamond-level Friend of the Podcast© saw a hot dude in her building’s hallway, and needs to get tactical . Can the Guy Friends impart their Delta Force-caliber Black Ops expertise to help her track down her target? Or would disseminating sensitive intel make them political prison...
Jul 02, 2013•20 min
Holy hiatus, the Guy Friends Podcast is back! Refreshed from vacation, we're ready to answer your summertime solicitations for estival enlightenment. In this episode: A listener wants to hit up her quasi-long-distance, 90%-something, not-official WHATEVER HE IS about what the hell they are. Can she admit her curiosity to him... and to herself? Take off that poopy diaper and don your sensible pantsuit — it's time to grow a pair, everybody! And the Guy Friends discuss Friend of the Podcast Chiara'...
Jun 26, 2013•19 min
In this episode: Can you really be friends with an ex? No really, can you REALLY be friends with an ex? A listener asks the Guy Friends how you can make such a seemingly impossible task possible. In short, as Aaron says, "Wounds heal." Or as Josh says, "What's the difference between an ex-girlfriend or ex-coworker?" And a question about - get ready for THIS - dating a girl across a country (not USA), across cultural and religious barriers, and behind her parents' backs. You'll just have to tune ...
May 30, 2013•21 min
It's a Very Special Maternal-But-Not-Suffocating Episode of the Guy Friends Podcast! Aaron's Mom has a question for the Guy Friends about words of motherly advice that they would pass on to their own children. We sift through the pearls of wisdom and nuggets of truth in search of the rare and coveted pearl-nuggets. Also: BABY NAMES! And Josh's Mom asks for the most formative global event of our lives. Ever the industry gurus, the Guy Friends realize that your show can't make it to the big league...
May 15, 2013•21 min
In this episode: Do normal vegetarian men exist? Or are they all debased, no-good hepcats swingin' their lewd jazz and shooting their veins full of the Devil's marihuana ? The Guy Friends assure a listener that she can find a vegetarian man who's just as boring as she is. Just remember to eat plenty of dark greens and legumes — iron is the sexiest vitamin! On a more serious note, a listener asks the Guy Friends what's up with Creep-Os with "yellow fever" (NOT OUR TERM). Do men who claim to have ...
May 07, 2013•20 min
In this episode: The Guy Friends tackle a thought experiment — You break up with your boyfriend. A month later, you get back together. You ask him whether he slept with anyone in that period of time when you totally weren't dating, and no one had any obligation toward anyone, and life was an open, sexy road. He says that he did. Do you freak out, like a crazy person? [y/n] And a listener wants to hit on a dude she flirts with at her neighborhood grocery store. The catch: he's an employee... who ...
May 02, 2013•18 min
In this episode: An intrepid listener wants to put her spelunking skills to the test and take a journey deep down to the center of her boyfriend. Her boyfriend's butt , to be exact. Anally. How does she broach this topic with her unwitting target? Is there a stigma against butt-stuff amongst straight dudes? The Guy Friends' bodies are ready... to answer this maturely. And a listener's boyfriend had a friend in town, but she was mega-rude! Boorish, even! Boorish. BOORISH. She was trying hard to c...
Apr 24, 2013•20 min
In this episode, we hear from a young woman who has "recently unlocked the Pandoric box of orgasmic delight." First of all, who knew that Pandoric was a word? Secondly, she wants to know whether she's allowed to keep faking it sometimes. Aaron and Josh do NOT agree. Plus, should you be worried about the potential for getting in-between two brothers and starting a Cain and Abel-esque feud that will span centuries? (Probably not.) Music: Asap Rocky feat.(Drake) 2 Chainz (Kendrick Lamar) - F*ckin P...
Apr 18, 2013•20 min
In this episode: SCANDAL ON MATRIMONY MOUNTAIN! A listener is getting ~*~flirty~*~ text messages from an engaged dude. How should she deal with the semi-advances of a man who's about to throw it all away... for happiness? Should she do anything at all? Or should she save him from either of his horrible mistakes? And for the second half of this episode, enjoy a selection from our academic paper: What To Do When The Guy You're Boning Won't Publicly Couch-Cuddle You: Sex, Society, and Signaling in ...
Apr 10, 2013•19 min
In this episode: A listener contacts us from the other side of the world about some out-of-nowhere body shaming. What do you do when the 44-year old "kept" Russian man you're boning pokes you in the belly and implies that you need to work out? We've all been there! And after a particularly Me'h first date, a guy still comes in to give our listener a kiss. Why do guys do that? Can't they tell when you're bored? Why do they feel entitled to making their big dumb face touch your bored, grumpy face?...
Apr 02, 2013•19 min
In this episode: Another for-a-friend question — you guys are so concerned recently! What should one think about a Craigslist post that offers a hot ticket, paired with a hot date ? Is this request creepy, legit... or both? Can she just show up to take the ticket sans date, or would that be extremely tacky and mean and she totally shouldn't? And a superchill listener had a contraception failure requiring a late-night run to CVS for Plan B (and beer!). Her dude of a few weeks offered to pay for i...
Mar 27, 2013•18 min
In this episode: Follow-up from a listener who had a secret, slightly life-altering medical issue but was hiding it from the dudes she was dating (and us!). Not only is she mostly OK, but we were right, and her pee is the color of fruit punch! EVERYONE WINS. A more serious question from a listener whose boyfriend has recently become overly-negative — and she's starting to feel it. How should she go about addressing the issue to him directly without making him feel bad about feeling bad? The Guy ...
Mar 20, 2013•23 min
In this episode: Everyone's calling in for their friends! Aaron own father writes in on behalf of a friend who thinks that she travels too much to date. Can a Jet-Setting Playgirl™ find the time to settle down? Or is Prince Charming's flight delayed... indefinitely?! And another friend is concerned about her bro's girlfriend and her insatiable sexual appetite! Her friend claims that she is wearing him out! Should she save him from this ex-sorority girl-turned-prison wildcat, all hopped up on ree...
Mar 15, 2013•21 min
In this episode: Urinal etiquette. An inquiring listener is dying to know the ancient and sacrosanct codes of conduct that each man must obey when the wieners come out. The Guy Friends throw their oaths of secrecy to the wind! And a listener asks the Guy Friends for advice when it comes to getting stalked by an ex's ex! Despite being the better human and backing away slowly, she's found herself the target of not-so-subtle warnings. Twitter following and unfollowing, Facebook stalking, late-night...
Mar 05, 2013•20 min
In this episode: A very bright and well-meaning listener wants to know how to use her vibrator on her boyfriend. The Guy Friends celebrate her gumption... and offer their words of caution. Aside from vibrators made for the job this may be the sort of thing that stays on the drawing board. Are you or your partner a male-bodied human who likes a little machine-assisted flutter in the Nutter Butters? Did you think that sentence was gross? Listen in — we do much worse! A dear listener has turned 21 ...
Feb 27, 2013•20 min
In this episode: When is it a good time to reveal a "non-life threatening, non-STD and non-forever health issue" while dating? Is complete, up-front transparency mandatory in mate selection, or is it none of anyone's beeswax? More improtantly: is there any set rubric for medical seriousness, or is it all a matter of perspective? Feel better! A listener's boyfriend has laid out his Zero Tolerance Threesome Policy. For all kinds! Naturally, she runs into the arms of the two hunkiest Guy Friends sh...
Feb 19, 2013•19 min
In this very special episode: It's here. It's now. It's VALENTINE'S DAY. Or better yet, it's THE GUY FRIENDS PODCAST ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY. You better believe it. In this, the special V-Day/B-Day episode, Josh and Aaron reflect on a holiday celebrating human Eros -- Josh tries to convince Aaron it's really a day for everyone. Tune in and find out if he succeeds. Meanwhile, Aaron creates a new abbreviation for "significant other", which actually could catch on... Just be the reed that blows in the...
Feb 12, 2013•22 min
In this episode: First up, Kate and Lauren educate the Guy Friends on who Kate Upton is, and they are not impressed. What is it about celebrities? Why do people think they're so sexy if they're always so squeamish about their sex tapes? A listener has been hanging out with a dude that she once made-out with for months... without any further make-outs! MONTHS. OF DRINKING IN BARS AT NIGHT. THEN GOING THEIR SEPARATE WAYS. What is this dudes deal? What's her deal? The Guy Friends' suggestion? Crack...
Feb 06, 2013•26 min
In this episode: A listener always has to go out of her way to set up the hangouts with a new guys she's been seeing. And he always says Yes! Does he like her? Should the one-sideness of planning give her any reasons to question his motives? What does a birthday appearance really mean in this day and age? Are there any female urologists out there? A woman in a straight long-distance relationship is tempted to makeout with a lady. It truly pains the Guy Friends to lead her towards the Moral and t...
Jan 29, 2013•19 min
In this episode: A massively over-hyped first date disappoints... one of them. What should our listener do with a guy whose "Meh" Meter is poorly calibrated? Is a second date necessary to break-up with someone you aren't even dating? Does anyone remember how to use an actual phone? Cunnilingus. Since the dawn of Man, it has raised the mighty to ascendancy, and destroyed whole empires. To wield it is an office as ancient and hallowed as the Great World Sea that bears the very Earth Tortoise herse...
Jan 23, 2013•22 min
In this episode: How long is too long to wait to introduce both sets of parents to each other? When they live in the same metropolitan area? The Guy Friends questions whether not wanting to is weird, or if it even matters. A gay friend from New Hampshire writes us about good dumping etiquette, and gets a lesson on how to continue his hunt through the snowy wilds while dealing with clingers. We also discuss our on-going OkCupid advice series , and make fun of both Lena Dunham and the New York Tim...
Jan 16, 2013•24 min
In this episode: The Guy Friends give advice on giving advice. How do you tell your sister that her BF is an Obvious Dick? With tact! And a conversation about age differences turns into a conversation about Windows 95. Naturally. Music: "Jai Paul - Jasmine (Cabo Blanco Dub Mix)" ( Phi Unit ) / CC BY 3.0
Jan 08, 2013•20 min
In this episode: A listener asks how one is expected to stake one's "claim" when two pairs of sexy strangers are meeting in a bar. Should you develop an intricate language of hypersubtle facial twitches and microgestures, like in Dune ? Yes. Barring that, the Guy Friends also have other advice. And the Guy Friends discuss New Year's Resolutions! The Guy Friends give their suggestions on resolutions we should all adopt for this coming year, as well as provide this year's updated interpretation of...
Jan 05, 2013•22 min
In this week's episode, a caller doesn't get whether being invited to Meet the Friends on a second date is a good or bad thing. Is it casual? Or is it not? Is it casual because it's not? It is serious and casual at the same time? And someone else has a thing about waking up in her bed ie: she's like every other human on earth and likes it more than waking up in her significant other's bed. One problem: she's not compromising. "George Michael vs Kelly Clarkson - Father Independent" ( SysiphusLove...
Dec 20, 2012•19 min
In this episode: Yet another listener and her friends call in to the podcast to contribute to our detailed census on women who pee in the shower. The Guy Friends will not rest until everyone is accounted for! A woman has a deep and probably mutual workplace crush on a coworker who just got out of a relationship. Jumping his bones is a no-brainer -- so why shouldn't she? Just how important is the separation between one's genitals and their money? Have the Guy Friends discovered the greatest t-shi...
Dec 12, 2012•22 min
