#192 Does Attraction Matter in a Relationship?

kind of are right. I agree. Really excited at this season of my life and this podcast because I have a book coming out August first, called Like a River, and it's just been top of mind for me because I just literally just finished recording the audiobook for it, and I've been, you know, working on how we're going to roll it out and you know, the promos behind you know, the publisher has to come up with all these ideas on how it's going to roll out on

August first, and right now, it's going to be on pretty much every place that you could find a book. It's going to be there, but including the audiobook, which is which I'm excited about. But what I'm excited to in relation to this podcast is that a lot of these questions I get, we can I could I could say, hey, check out the book. You know, chapter six I talked about this happened to me. Your question happened to me, and here's a here's a here's the answer of how

I walked through it. Take it as you please, right. And then the other thing is the other side of that is you guys could say, hey, I noticed that this happened to you, and I saw you wrestle it with with it this way, and I did it this way, and we could discuss that way anyway. I think it's a great conversation starter, and so I'll probably talking about that as we continue on, and maybe maybe we can get more in depth about what the book is about.

It's about surviving grief, but it's just it's this is a heads up that we have fun times coming with the podcast, especially after Like a River August. First, let's get to the first question here. I don't I don't prepare for these, so this is all random. Subdecline says mental health for me and my family. Hey, Grindrick, my name is Zach. Your music helps me get through a lot. My grandma and Grandpa are declining in health and won't

take care of themselves. When me or my wife or my mom try to help them, they get upset and get mad at us for trying to help. Where we schedule doctor's appointments and they won't go, and then they blame us for that as well. I'm trying to find peace with the whole situation. And on top of that, my family gets upset when we reach out to my grandparents because they favor my aunt and her kids. Okay, So then he ends up by saying any kind of

guidance would be appreciated, Thank you, Zach. Zach sounds like it sounds like, especially at the end there, there's like some family dynamics that I don't know about, but that I don't think that's the point of your email. Let's talk about your grandparents. They're declining in health, they won't take care, they won't take care of themselves, and they

get mad if you try. Well, I don't think. I don't think yet you have thought about it from their perspective, and that's probably where I would go in my you know, fireside chat with you. That's what we're doing. We're sitting by the campfire, and I would say, Zach, just because somebody that you love doesn't want or need or ask for your help, it doesn't mean that they don't love you, or that you don't love them enough or you're not trying hard enough. What if they're just content with where

and who they are. That's sometimes that's hard to swallow, as you know a grandson like you are, and you're like, hey, I want you guys to take care of yourself so that I can get ten or fifteen more years out of you. Hey, I know that deep down you wouldn't say that. I wouldn't say that, No one would say that out loud. But deep down that's the issue here,

isn't it. You want them on this earth so you could be with them and benefit from them and you don't have to hurt from the loss of them four, ten, fifteen, twenty more years. What if you take yourself out of it and listen, I'm trying to kind of tread lightly on this, but what if you take yourself out of

and you're like, they are happy right now. They don't want to worry about medical stuff and hearing the doctor tell them that they're getting old and they have something else wrong with them that might require surgery or some kind of hospital stay. They cost a lot of money. They would rather just do their thing, just do the

routine that they love to do. And if that cost them a little bit earlier passing in their life, if that, if that costs them, you know, a little bit less off to the top of their life, then they're okay with that. The question is are you okay with them being content? You could still love them in a way that you go, Hey, I'm concerned about you, guys, but I'm not going to push anything because you've lived a lot longer than me. Grandpa. You've seen this, You've seen

a lot more stuff than I have. And maybe, just maybe, by the time I get to your age, Lord Willing, I feel the same way as you. It's like, Hey, don't want to go to doctor. It's gonna get me more years. He's gonna keep me alive for a few more years. I don't know if I want that. It's interesting, but I don't think you've thought of it that way, and so I want to suggest it. Okay, just love them, Just love them. You don't have to Loving someone doesn't mean you got to keep up with them. And make

sure they're taking their medicine. That doesn't mean that just be there for him, be there to facilitate whatever they want, right, I mean you don't want to. I'm not saying go too far and let them. Actually they're physically hurting themselves, but to some extent if they want some they want to eat some ice cream, and they got high cholesterol and they're eighty five years old, just let them eat the ice cream. Right. Thanks for the emailing, buddy. Next question,

Sepicliente says, does attraction matter? Hey, Grainder been listening to the podcast for a while now, and I've gotten so much good advice from it. Thank you. I got to ask a question. Excuse me. I got asked out by a good Christian a few days ago. I've known him for a while and he's a genuinely great guy. He checks all the boxes. I just don't really feel attracted to him in a romantic way. Does attraction matter? Or

should I listen to what logically makes sense? Thanks for all you do, Anonymous, Anonymous, thank you for the email. I think it's a good question. I think it's a good question because we all know these people that kind of check all the right boxes, except there's just nothing there. There's no chemistry, nothing gives you the butterflies. And you ask, doesn't matter? I say, yes, I think it does. I think attraction is is there for a reason, it's it's

attraction isn't just frivolous. We could look at it. Sometimes we go, oh, you know, appearances on the outside don't matter as much as the inside. We say that all the time, right, just tell someone you can't judge a book by this cover. We say that, okay, and and

that's right. There's nothing wrong with saying that and believing those those you know, core virtues that what's on the inside is more valuable and more longer lasting, and that everything on the outside will eventually get old and wither away and be gone. Right, So we don't We don't stay because of the way someone looks. We stay with them because of the connection we have in our heart and the the the inner connection of who they are

as a person. That's what makes a lasting relationship, and that's what everyone ultimately wants, is that person that you could sit on the porch with in the rocking chair when you're eighty years old and you're holding hands. You know, and at that point doesn't matter what they look like anymore. No, But because of all that all just said, I don't think we just toss away attraction because it's a natural part of relationships. It's a natural part of how we're

created to be. It's a natural part of boy meets girl. Boy is attracted by girl and therefore ask her out because initially he sees that attraction initially, right, and then he gets to know her and he falls in love with her and who she is. But it's there for a reason, so that he doesn't just ask everyone out. He doesn't see every girl on a street that's around his age, and regardless of what they look like, he just ask him out and tries to get coffee with

them to see if there's a connection. That that's why attraction exists, right, So we don't count it out. And yes, to answer your question, does it matter, Yes, it matters. So you got a guy he checks all the boxes. I wouldn't count him out yet, because hey, y'all correct me if I'm wrong. But girls can be attracted later after their heart's a little bit more connected. I don't

think guys do that as much. They can. It's possible, but it's more likely that a girl could get to be friends with the guy that she's not attracted to, and then gets a little more intimate in their conversations. She finds out how sweet he is, how he serves his mother, how he you know, what a good guy he is when they go, you know, when she sees him out and walking his dog or whatever, and then she's like, man, I'm really starting to like this guy. Guys don't do that as often, but girls can so.

For you, I would say, don't don't kick him to the curb, continue to talk with them, go grab coffee, hang out in groups. But if there's not an attraction, ultimately, it's not going to work. You can't just put that off forever and say eventually, it doesn't matter if I like him or not, it's all about what's on the inside. He's not handsome at all. To me. Is that what you want? Is that what you deserve? Anonymous? Is that what you want? A guy that checks the boxes but

you're not attracted to him. I think you're going to find a guy that you are attracted to and you connect with that checks all the boxes. That's the guy for you. I don't think that's too much to ask. Next question, subject client says, what should I do? They're going Your name is Kyle eighteen from New Jersey. Just recently found your podcast and I've been listening and it's really helped me grow. And I'm also going through a breakup.

This girl and I broke up because her dad is very controlling in her life and thought that she was not focused on school because she was in a relationship with me. But he also liked me. But he made her and her twin sister block me on social media trying to follow this email here and I never got a reason or anything behind it. They stopped contacting me, and I've not contacted them. It's been two months since it's happened. I was wondering should I reach out or

let it be. I've moved on, but at the same time, I want to know why all of this treatment happened to me. I'm going to college with her sister next year, so I'm not sure if I should wait till I ask. Then it was the biggest wake up call in my life, and I found myself and was able to self supply my own happiness. Yes, but I would not love but I would love to get your opinion here. Thank you, Kyle. All Right, Kyle, I think I'm following when your brother.

Thank you for the email. I appreciate it and shout out to New Jersey. Let's break this down here. First of all, let's talk about the relationship, the breakup, the dad. Let's justify the dad real quick. The dad is telling his daughter, I don't think I don't think you should be with this guy because he's making you not focus on school. Okay, we can't blame him for that, especially since we don't know. I don't know all the information,

but I don't think he just made that up. I think there would be some kind of legitimate reason that he thinks you are taking more attention away from her school and she needs to be focusing on school right now. She's probably about sixteen, seventeen, eighteen years old, and I can't say I disagree with dad. Right I've got a daughter. I think I might tell her the same thing if she was getting a little too close to some guy.

It's like, hey, I need you to back away from this guy because I need you to focus on school right now. There's plenty of time for this later. I don't think that's a bad thing, So let's not blame dad without knowing the whole story. Secondly, he made her and her sister block you on social media. Now there's a lot of reasons for that. I don't think that that's not necessarily a bad thing either. I talk about that all the time or recommend people block people on

social media on this podcast all the time. It has nothing to do with not liking the person. It's more about just being able to health, have a lot of health and moving on and just be be be out of side, out of mind for your own heart to heal, not for not for you know, being a bad guy to the other person. Right, So I'm not blaming him for either of these things. So then it comes to you, what should you do. You're confused, you don't know why they did this, and the dad said break up and

then block him. So then you're asking this question. I've been wondering if I should reach out or let it be, Kyle, let it be, don't reach out, let it be. Nothing good can happen from this. You're not gonna go in there and change things like all of a sudden, now the dad likes you, or now the dad's out of the picture, and he doesn't speak into her life as much like he'd used to. It's been two months, brother. No, you're done. You're done. You're blocked. You're blocked on social media.

If I tell someone on this podcast to block somebody on social media, it's for their own healing. And so I don't want that person, the person they blocked, going through the back door and coming in through the window in the kitchen and interrupting their life. Again, it's no offense to you, that's just what the scenario is calling for. No, you're done. Now, that's finished. Now let's go to the end of the email, because to me, it gets even

more interesting you say this last sentence. It was the biggest wake up call in my life, and I found myself and was able to self supply my own happiness. H I don't believe you, Kyle. I love you, brother, and I wish I could talk to you face to face, But I don't believe you because I was once eighteen and the fact that you could find your you found yourself once again, Kyle. I letna say all this out

of love. Okay, this is just tough love. I'm gonna say all this because I actually care about you, and not not because I dislike you. But you found yourself? Where were you hiding? Where did you go? How did you lose yourself? That's my first question. And you go, ah, Granger, you know what I mean. Man, I've found myself Like I didn't. I didn't know who who, I hadn't come into my own yet. I'm like, I get it. But I'm saying, if you were lost, you found yourself where?

How did you What did you read? Who did you hear from? What did you do in the two months since you broke up with your girlfriend? You go, oh, now I found myself. I was lost before, but now I'm found. Tell me more about that. Second of all, I want talked about the lie that you the lie that has been fed to you. It's not your lie, it's a lie of the world that has been fed to you that tells you that you have the ability to quote self supply your own happiness. How do you

do that? Can you produce more of that and sell it to other people so that they could buy some of your happiness because you are a self supplier of it. I want to tell you, brother, that's not possible. You have been. I don't want to try. I want to tread lightly here because I don't want to I don't want you to take it the wrong way that I'm just kind of dogging on you. But I want to tell you. I want to give you a warning. I

was once eighteen, for sure. And if you come to the conclusion that you have the ability to find yourself when you're lost and self supply your own happiness, I promise you that is leading down a path that you will not be able to recover from. Let me put it this way. If you're driving down a road and you realize that you have control of the vehicle, and you finally realize that not only do you have control of the vehicle, but you have control of the road itself,

then that might work for a little bit. You might be able to get around some potholes, you might be able to avoid a couple of head on incidents from people driving on the wrong side of the road. But one day the bridge will be out. You'll be driving down the road and the bridge is gone, and suddenly you driving your car and control realize you might be able to control that, but you cannot control the road itself. And at that point, what will you rely on your

self supplied happiness? What happens when your self supply runs out? This is something I want you to wrestle with. I want you to think on hard, and it's not something that you might just come up with all at once, But I want to challenge you and say you didn't find yourself, you weren't lost, and you cannot self supply your own happiness. Keep listening to this podcast. I appreciate you. Brother. Let's catch up one of these days. In first, we'll take a break and be read back. Podcast is brought

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I cannot wait to discuss this book further with y'all. Back to the podcast. All right, back to the podcast. Let's dive into your emails. You could hit me up Grangersmith podcast at gmail dot com. Grangersmith podcast at gmail dot com. That's my email and I will go through these emails now. Okay, no notes in front of me, no quotes, books, you know, So making this up as I go and hearing this as I read it for

the first time with you. Okay, the next question here is subject line says anonymous, because they know that sometimes I mess that up. Anonymous scripture direction email says, hey Granger, I have a deep rooted battle with rejection that stems back to my toddler years. I have endured several different

levels of abuse from physical, sexual, verbal, and mental. After eight years of not dating and focusing on myself healthy, on getting myself healthy, and even finally obtaining my VA and MBA, but my new boyfriend did something not maliciously and unknowingly that seemed to send me back into fear, insecurity and self doubt of rejection. My question is what scripture can you recommend? And battling my own heart and

mind about the rejection, insecurities, and self doubt. Thanks for everything, Anonymous. Okay, I am going to keep you anonymous because you said it three times and I will respect that. Thank you so much for the email, Thanks for being vulnerable, Thanks for listening to the podcast and trusting me with something that's very very difficult for you. And so that's I don't take that lightly. That's not lost on me. I

don't know the details. I don't know and I don't need to know what you've battled with stemming back to your toddler years. And I don't need to know what your new boyfriend did, but I can answer your question about scripture. You say this, what scripture can be recommended in battling my own heart and mind about the rejection, insecurities and self doubt? Okay, great, I'm glad you said this. Let's dive into this. Love you, I appreciate you, and I want you to know that I feel strongly about

this subject. I feel strongly about this. We cannot look at the Bible as an encyclopedia that we go and we grab something, we've pulled it out, and we open it up to learn about something, and then we put that that number of the encyclopedia collection back onto the shelf. Just kids. Not intended to be that way. It never was. That's what's crazy. It never was intended to be that way.

It became that way recently, and like the last probably sixty seventy years out of two thousand since the since the Cannon was completed, roughly and just recently did we start using it for certain aspects of life and not everything, but some like insecurities, like you're asking about rejection self doubt or suffering or hope, are managing wealth or prayer,

life or marriage or church. We just recently started pulling these things out, these truths out, and offering them in the form of literature and devotionals, so that you could pick up a devotional and flip to the page that says insecurities, and you read two or three verses about insecurities, and then you read a commentary written by some man or woman about those verses, and it's about a page and a half and you close the devotional and you slide it back onto the shelf and you say, Okay,

that was awesome, that felt really good. And then two or three days go by and you I'm struggling again. I'm struggling with this insecurity again. And you fumble down the shelf and you pull out that devotional and you pull it back out and you read those verses again and it feels kind of nice, and you read what the commentator said, and you go, okay, I feel feel a little bit better again. You put it back on the shelf, and now even less time goes by, you're

already worried and anxious and insecure again. So then you go, maybe there's something else. Maybe all Google, maybe there's another book. And so you find a book on Amazon and it's called it's called Insecurities in the Modern World. I'm making this up that doesn't exist. Insecurities in the modern World of a Christian And you go, oh, that's pretty good paperback seven ninety nine, it's about one hundred and twenty pages,

I'll buy it. So it comes in and it's like, you open up the first page and he goes, are you insecure? Yeah? Do you feel rejection? Yeah? Yeah, you feel self doubt? Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah, me. Well, join the ranks of many others. And in the Bible we could find a few verses that can help us feel better about this. And you start reading, and this is what we do, this is how we seek it, this is what we go for, and it's just not the way it was intended to be. Right, you've tracked so far.

So here's my point. The remedy to your feeling of rejection, your feeling of insecurity, your feeling of self doubt. The remedy of that lies within the knowledge, your knowledge of who God is, if you understand him and what he is doing, what he will do, and what he has done your insecurities, your anxiety, your worry, your self doubt, your fear of rejection, starts breaking apart. That's what it's supposed to do. That's what scripture is supposed to do.

Not by finding one word or one line or three lines that Paul wrote and you pull it out of the context of what he meant to say to the Corinthians or to the Galatians or to the Romans, and you pull it out and somebody else commentates on that as if it never existed with the entire letter. Then it doesn't have the healing effect because guess what, you don't know who God is. You just heard a few really nice words written by a man in first century Jerusalem,

interpreted by some other man in twenty twenty three. But you don't know who God is. Out of that, you just know some pretty nice words. Instead, you start a reading plan consistent every morning, every night, every after. I don't care when it is, but you don't miss You treat it like your daily bread, because it is give us this day our daily bread. We need to go there and feast on that bread. In the context of the whole cannon I'm talking sixty six books. I'm talking

slowly absorbing it. So it's going to take you a year to do this. But as you're walking through, you start gaining those truths. And as you make it all the way through, you're gaining a certain amount of truths. And then you start again and you read it through again, and this is a journey that you'll take the rest of your life. Well, this is not the answer you wanted right now. You wanted something quick. You wanted to fix something that has been hurting you since you were

a toddler. Something has been affecting you since you were a toddler. And did you really think that on this podcast I was going to give you one scripture or two that would heal you from that. The scripture, those words don't heal you. It is who those words are that heals. John One says, in the beginning was the word, and the word was with God, and the word was God. Skip down a few verses it says the word became flesh.

So we read through the Bible not looking for little little gold nuggets, little things that we could hang up in the kitchen, But instead we read to learn who God is, how by the promises He made, by things that he has done, the things that he is doing, and things that he will do. And we see all of those truths over and over and over and over and over until it pounds into our numb and insecure brains. It's like, this is who I am. This is why I called you, This is your purpose. This is how

long I've been planning it. Since the beginning of time, since before you were even a thing, I was planning you and your purpose. I made you, I knit you in your mother's womb. Every single hair on your head is numbered and counted, and I know every day left in your life. I know everything about you. I know everything you've gone through. I've ordained all the things that

have happened to you. If there was evil that happened to you, I ordained it for a reason, to prepare you for something to How can you ever look anonymous? How could you ever be full of forgiveness unless someone did something, Unless someone didn't do something to you that needed to be forgiven. You become a forgiver, which you should be, because people do things to you that need to be forgiven. How do you become brave? You become brave from going through things that scare you, and you

conquer it and you grow with bravery. Right, this goes with any virtue. Any virtue requires some kind of fired to walkthrough, to refine you to get to that virtue. So God made you in a way that he needed you to have all these virtues. So he put this in your life. You Ordainity, planned it, purposed it for

a reason. And as you go through the Bible and you see all of these truths over and over and pound it into your brain, and you go, I know my God and everything I didn't have before, everything I lacked, all the knowledge I didn't understand was it didn't come from me not knowing a certain scripture. It came from me not knowing who God is. Hmmm, That's how I feel about that question. Let's go another one here. The question subject line says family problems. Hey Granger. My name

is MICHAELA. I'm sixteen. I'm from Afton, Wyoming. Here's the backstory. My dad's in the military. He originally went a Marine, but he switched to the Guard to be closer to home. He was also a police officer, but he quit recently. I tell my dad slash family that I want to join the military, but they seem like they are very disappointed in me when I talk about it. I feel like if I joined the military, they're gonna hate me or something. My mom doesn't like the idea any better

than his than he does. But this has been a dream of mine for almost my whole life. My question is should I join the military or should I find something else to do as a career to make them happy and keep a good relationship with them. Of the podcast, Love the Channel Thinks. But Kayla, okay, Mikhayela, thank you

for the question. It's a good one. Let me tell you something, one hundred and ninety some odd episodes of this podcast, this is not the first time I've heard a question just like this one that has to do with either the military or law enforcement. And I say that in a way to encourage you that you're not alone.

So many times we see when families have a father or mother that's in law enforcement or the military, they see some things, look at it from their perspective, they see some things that they don't want their daughter to see or their son. So let me ask you this, MICHAELA, just for a second, step back, just for a second, can you blame them? Can you blame them? Your dad has seen things, done things, And when he was doing these things deployed, he had a little baby, beautiful baby

girl at home named Michaela. And he thought to himself, I promise you, he thought to himself, as he saw these horrors of war. He thought, I'm over here fighting to do everything I can to make sure my daughter Mikayla doesn't ever have to see something like this. I promise you. It's out of love. And so then several years go by, Mikaela comes to dad, Dad, I want to do that. That's my dream. I want to go

to war. And he says, oh Lord, no, no, no, no, no no. He thinks he justifies it by saying, you see, you see the camaraderie, you see the uniform, you see the paycheck, you see the traveling the world. You know, you get the world traveler, you see that, But you don't see what I know. I've seen some stuff you don't want to see. I need to protect you from that, and I will make sure you don't get into this. That's what he's thinking. So michaeleb, first of all, start there.

Start there. He's not being mean and look at your mother's perspective. Look at the mother's perspective. The dad calls home, he's deployed, right, I'm making a lot of this up. I'm just kind of filling in gaps that I don't know about. I'm filling in blanks. Dad calls mom, how is your day? I saw something stuff out here. It's

no good, no good. And she says, honey, I'm so sorry, and he goes, go hug her baby, girl, Go give go, give Mikayla a kiss for me, and tell her that we're over here fighting so that we could have a free country where she doesn't have to deal with stuff. And she said, Mama said, okay, you got it, honey. I will fast forward. Here comes Mikayla. Hey, Mom, I'm going to join the military. That's their perspective. You got to see that. You got to see it comes from love.

I want you to realize that, Mikayla, and then from then on, from then, at that point, you move forward by conversations and you use you stand on the you stand on the platform, on the on the foundation that you know, the firm ground you know, and this is what you know. They love you stand there, don't stand on this like defensive. You never let me do what I want to do. Why should I do things just to make you happy? I wanted the things that makes me.

Don't stand there, sit them down, and good dad. Mom. First of all, I feel so loved in this family, and I want to thank you for always wanting what's best for me out of love, including this whole military idea. I love the idea, probably because I love Dad and I've looked up to you for so long, Dad, and I've seen the man that you are and I love that and I love you, and being in the military for me is part of that journey being more like Dad.

But I know and I respect your opinions. I respect that you don't want me to see some things or do some things that you had to do, and you'll always protect your little girl and I love you for that, Dad. But all I'm asking is, kid, we talk about it, is this? Can this be an ongoing discussion? And if you say no, I'm gonna honor you. I'm gonna honor your word on this. But all I ask is that we just keep the door open that possibly in the future you can consider what a career in the military

might look for me. What if you started there, Michaelum, that's what I think you should do. I'll say it one more here. Subject line says feeling lost and behind. Hey, grand I'd like to remain anonymous. I'm twenty four years old. Recently decided to move in with my older brother, his wife, and they're two older kids in order to save money. I'm sorry I read that wrong. His wife and their two year old kid, in order to save money for

a house I planned to buy within six months. I could stay here, but it would take me possibly years to say save up of what I could in just months of living with them. With how high rent is. Right now, I've always felt ahead of my peers in life thus far, and have been living on my own for six years. I'm scared to go backwards with my independence. I know I'm gonna I'm gonna save money and reach my goals faster, but I can't help feeling like I'm

a failure. On top of all this, I'm really struggling with feeling behind while all my other friends are getting married and having kids. I'm also content being single, but sometimes I feel the pressure to be always progressing. I want to enjoy this season without feeling like a failure. I've been praying to God for peace and guidance, but would love your opinion. Thank you, Thank you for all you do with your podcast. All right, Anonymous twenty four

years old. Thank you for sharing and opening up here. I'm glad that you I'm glad you did I'm glad you could trust me with that. And I appreciate your heart and where your heart is your position on all this. You're trying to do the right thing, and you're trying to do the best thing for your family and for

you and for your future, and you're thinking through. The only part I don't like about your email really is when you started getting into this struggling feeling because of other people and what they're doing, and they're getting married and they're having kids and you're not. That's the part I don't like. And social media helps just make that a really big deal. Okay, so that's something you got to deal with outside of this problem itself, but that's

also a normal feeling. So stop looking around. You see those people getting married. They're not as happy as you think. You see they're all having babies over there, They're not as happy as you think. I promise you. I promise you. Everyone is dealing with something. Everyone is struggling or feeling inadequate in some way. Okay, even if they're married and have kids and you don't. In fact, there's a lot of good, good things going on with you at twenty

four years old and you're still single. There's a lot of good things. You got a clean slate right now, because I got a lot of people emailing that have problems at twenty four. They got divorces going on, they got child support, it's problems. You got a clean slate. You're doing good. I think you ask for my opinion. I think if you're your older brother and wife and two year old, if they're cool with this, if they

feel good about this, I feel good about it. Moving in with them, you get a couple things out of this. You get to be an aunt to your two year old nephew right in a wather you never could if you didn't live there. So this is going to be a very special season because two year olds. I got almost two year old in my house right now. Two year olds are special in a lot of ways, good

and bad. But they're absorbing the world around them, and it's really fun, really neat to see an aunt moves in and gets to be with this two year old in a very critical time, a very a time of growth for this child. I think it's really special. And if if the if mom and dad are cool with it, I think you go and you do this, and you you look at it from a perspective of you talking about independence, you're talking about progressing. Look at it as

a moment a season of your life of serving. So you're gonna go in there and you're gonna you're gonna serve your brother and your sister in law, and you're gonna help clean the house. You're gonna help out with groceries. You're gonna help with the two year old, which is huge. All it's huge to be able to go into like

offer babysitting. You're gonna you're gonna help with yard work or you know, the different things around the house, different ways you can contribute and serve them because they need you. A family with a two year old and a young fan family, they need you come in and serve them. This is the season for serving, and what you get out of it is you're gonna get to save some

rent money for the future. So I think if you go in and you have a plan and you say we're gonna do this four twelve months, maybe that's a good amount of time. We're gonna do this for twelve months. I'm gonna serve you, and you're gonna write it down so you don't ever become a mooch. But you're gonna be like, I'm gonna do this, this, this for you. I'm gonna babysit two days a week, I'm gonna take care of I'm gonna cook a meal once a week. Uh. You know, I'm gonna help you with this and this right,

and then you've got it in writing. There's no ambiguous problems going on, like these dishes are always out. But I don't know if that's my responsibility or not, okay, because that stuff could happen. And then you just pour into your little nephew and then you save money. I think this is a great plan. I don't think there's

anything wrong with it. And all the while, you're not caring about other people or what they're doing, or although all your friends getting married, you're not thinking about that because you are investing in your future, not only by saving money, but by learning how to serve your family. I think it's great. That's all we have today, guys. Sure love y'all. We'll see you next Monday. Thanks for joining me on the Grangersmith Podcast. I appreciate all of you. Guys.

You could help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel. Hit that little like button and notification spell so that you never miss anytime I upload a video. If you have a question for me that you would like me to answer, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com.