#146 This is a waste of your time

love doing this. We put this out every single Monday. We've done it a lot of Mondays, and we've answered a lot of questions. And I encourage you to email me Grangersmith podcast at gmail dot com. If you have a question, that's Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. We'll get to it. We'll walk through it casually. It could be about any subject and I'll answer it like we're old friends, and I'll answer it like you a friend.

And if any friend had a question for me about life, I'm going to walk through it in long term podcast form and walk through it. I have no notes with me, I have nothing to look at. Just good old fashioned friends. That's what we are. So the first question I have here. The subject line says, is morally good enough? Heygre and your mo name is Laura. I'm twenty nine years old from Illinois. My husband is an all around great guy. He's kind to everyone, a great father and husband. God's

moral law is clearly written on his heart. But he cannot surrender to Jesus and fully believe in him. I pray the every day that he will. He thinks that if he is to be judged by him when they die, and if God is merciful, he wouldn't throw him in hell because of his life on earth. He is so full of love talking about God. So my main question here is can someone be saved after they die and

meet with their creator and believe? Is there any biblical evidence you could give me to either confirm or deny? Is he cursed with abundance? Do you think that's possible? I am a new creation in God and I am the spiritual leader of our family, leading by actions, going to church, reading my Bible submitting. I know I cannot make him believe. Thank you so much for reading my question. And if I don't hear back from you, I surely

will seek wise counsel. I have never missed a podcast or an episode of the smiss I hope to see you in concert someday, Laura. Laura, thank you so much for the email, and thank you for the kind words and for listening to the podcast and watching the Smiths. I appreciate you so much. And it's such a great question. It's, in fact, I think, the most important question anyone could ask, and so I'm happy to answer it. And I'm sorry

that you're in this predicament. But I want to thank you for your faithfulness because you sound like just an incredible woman and you seem to be pretty knowledgeable at only twenty nine years old. Shout out to one of my favorite stats, Illinois as well. So let's dive into this. The answer to your question can someone be saved after they died and meet with the creator and believe? So basically what you're saying is can you go to heaven

without believing in Jesus? And that is that is the question, and the answer is a resounding no, you cannot. And I'm not speaking on my opinion here. This is not the Granger Smith podcast opinion show. This is not what I feel or what I hope or what I learned from my parents growing up, or what some pastor taught me in church. It's none of that. What I'm telling you is straight from the Bible, over and over and over again. Jesus said, I am the Way, the truth,

and the life. No one comes to the Father but by me. There are many ways, and many scriptures and many verses you could find that He is the only way. Now, some of you listening might think, well, that's not very loving of you to force your opinion on me, or to force this this idea on me. So then I would ask you, is it loving if I know from the Bible, which we have so much evidence to say that the Bible is true and we could back that

up a million different ways. So if I'm reading the Bible and I tell you what it says that you will not make it. You will not make it to Heaven without faith in Jesus. If I tell you that after I read it, is it loving for me to tell you that? Or is it more loving for me to just hide that information from you that after I've clearly read it and let you off on your own, Because I don't want to intrude in your life and I don't want to force my opinions on you. So

which version is more loving? If that's what I read, and that's what I believe, I think everyone would agree it is much more loving of me to tell the truth that I've read through the Bible. This is not my truth. This is not something that I just came up with. Like I said, it's not something I grew up with. And now that's how I think. It's something we read in the truth of the Bible, which is the truth. Jesus says, I am the truth. Not your truth or my truth, or world truth, or political truth

or social truth. I am the truth. Okay. So he has said that, and he has been very clear about that. And then also we could see stuff like Ephesians two and Ephesians too. It'll say, for by grace you have been saved through faith. It is not your own doing. It is the gift of God, not a result of work, so that no man can boast, For we are His workmanship, created in Jesus Christ for good works which God has prepared before that we should walk in them. That's Ephesians

two eight through ten. So what this is saying is and this is to your husband's idea about works, because because James says in the Bible that faith without works is dead. So what he's saying is, if you have true faith, then you will be able to see the fruits of that faith through your works. But works are secondary. Works are the result of the faith first. And guess what the faith is a gift. That's what Ephesians two says. It is a gift of God. For by grace you

have been saved through faith in Jesus. And this is not your own doing. It is the gift of God, not a result of work. So that no man may boast, because if you get to heaven, you've done a bunch of good works, and you go I didn't believe in Jesus, But I look at all the good works that I did, and you're gonna start feeling all uppity about it like you did it, and God's gonna say, get out of here. That is clearly not what I said. I said, surrender,

have faith in myself. So then you could say, how could a loving God reject people because they didn't love his son? And my response to that would be, our loving God gave us an opportunity through his son and sent his son, and those that have faith in him and love him, would be saved. Now he's not going to save the people that reject his son. God was gracious enough to send his son to be persecuted and die on a cross and live a perfect life as an example for us, because the law which he abolished

was a good law. But we couldn't do it. We couldn't live up to it. We couldn't live up to the ten commandments. Everyone listening hasn't You can't. You've all told a lie in your life. Sometime, you've all stole something in your life. At some time, you've all looked at a woman with lust in your life. At some time, you've broken the law. It couldn't be done. He had to send his perfect son as an example for us, so that he could be the substitute for us and our sin, so that when God looks at us, he

sees his son dwelling in us. That's the whole idea of an atonement. There is no other way. Your husband is guilty because he also knows. He knows he's been given this. Now now you're thinking, well, what do I do well. The Bible also says that the Gospel is the power of God for salvation in Romans too, So our faith comes from that gift of faith comes from hearing the word. So you have to preach it to him. You have to preach the gospel what I've just told you.

Jesus died on the cross as a substitute for our sins. Believe in that, repent, turn to him and you'll be saved. That's the gospel. So in hearing that, it activates. It activates. Not everyone, but those that are meant to be activated will be activated upon hearing that word. Maybe not right off the bat, like, maybe not an instant thing. It might be years, but that's the seed that's planted. So you have to just tell him the gospel. You can't

convince him. You can't convince him with nice, eloquent words. It's just the gospel. That's all you could do. Love him, pour into him, show him the life that you live now because you're so different with this grace. That's all you could do. But there is no other way. Next question subde lines just says. Question says, Heygriner, have been listening to the podcast for a while. I had a question in my own. I'm seventeen. I started going to church by myself. Soon after I turned sixteen, I found

the Lord and got baptized a few months ago. Now, my parents are telling me they don't want me to go to church because I got in trouble at home, and they know that this is something I enjoy. I really love going to church and all the people there, and I don't know how to explain it to them how important, how important it is to me. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. A question comes from a guy named Jude seventeen and there's a lot of problems in

this email. Thank you for listening, buddy, and thank you for emailing in. And I'll get right to it. First, let me go to your question when you said, when you're talking about the people you love at church, and you said, I don't know how to explain to them how important it is to me. Okay, you're talking about your parents. Well that's kind of a relevant right now, because what they're doing is they're they're punishing you. They're disciplining you for something you did wrong. So let's go

back to that. What did you do wrong? Like at some point you're still living in the under the roof of your parents and the Bible says, as you know, you've got to obey your parents. So by disobeying your parents and do something wrong, they're hitting you with the punishment. They don't understand exactly what this kind of punishment is, but it really doesn't matter. They're taking away something you love. And so what do you do? Obey them, honor them.

They you watch church online, you could talk to your people, your friends and just say, hey, guys, I screwed up. I messed up. My parents aren't going to let me go to church for the next three or four weeks. Surely anybody would understand that. But this is not something to rebel and go No, I'm going to church because I believe in God and I need to be in church,

and I have all my friends there. So because you see what you're doing, then you're contradicting the Bible itself by disobeying your parents and not honoring them so that you can go to church. That doesn't work that way, So honor them, work on the behavior. Whatever you did wrong, work on that, and guess what. Another year you're eighteen, you're going to hit a ride a passage. Maybe you'll be out of the house by then. Hopefully you will.

I always preach you get out of the house and then you could do whatever you want and hopefully you won't mess up. Thanks from the email brother. Last question, subject line says the Army in marriage. Hey grangerom getting married soon to my best friend. We're beyond excited. He's getting deployed overseas next year with the military. We've been separated before due to trainings and at one point I didn't hear from him for two months. However, this time

it seems different. We will be married and he'll be gone for a year with a large amount of time difference. I always see your post on Instagram about the military in our country makes me happy knowing that someone is as famous as you still supports the military. Was just hoping for some encouragement when it comes to being a newly wet and being separated. I love the Lord and trust that he has helped me through previous trainings and separations.

I know he's going to help me through this deployment. Thanks in advance, Madison. This question comes from Madison. Thank you for your service, Madison, and you're soon to be husband as well. I feel for you and this is a tough situation. It's a place to be, and the statistics show that you're gonna this is not going to work. Statistics will tell you that your marriage will fail because your husband's on a year long deployment. So know that

and beat the statistic. Don't be that statistic. Beat it. Beat that statistic. Okay. Lower your expectations of what you're going to need from him over this next year. And I know that's difficult. I know that's difficult. But for instance, if you don't hear from him for two weeks and then you finally do and you're so excited to hear from them, and you've just been dying to hear from him, and you get just a quick email, lower your expectations

of what you're expecting. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you. It doesn't mean he wants to come home and get a divorce, or he's found somebody new, or he's over it. Avoid those thoughts because those are just feelings that are lying to you. Just have grace for him. He's doing something that none of us can understand. He's overseas, he's seeing things that we can understand, and on the same ticket, you're doing things that he can't understand as well. You're

home waiting for a husband for a year. He can't understand that either, so you both have to have grace for each other. But I would say, since you can't control him, focus on yourself. Go into this going. I'm gonna make it for twelve months, and I'm gonna I'm not going to expect a whole lot from him. I'm not gonna expect a lot emotionally and not expecting long phone calls and long emails. Then if you get it, great, it exceeds your expectations. But don't start nagging, and don't

start worrying and getting letting loneliness drive you crazy. Lean into your friends, get a couple new hobbies. I would suggest writing a letter to your husband every single day. That would be my challenge to you, three hundred and sixty five days worth of letters to your husband. These aren't emails or letters that you physically send. You're gonna keep them at home, physically, write them a pen and

a paper and just write them. Tell them about your day, tell them about how much you miss them, how much you love them, Tell him how committed you are to this marriage. Tell him, tell him that nothing is going to separate you too, nothing and talk about the season's changing and new friends that you meet and new hobbies that you're trying, and pour it out onto these papers. And when he gets home, give him the gift of three hundred and sixty five letters of love and commitment.

That's going to keep your brain thinking about him and focused on the mission at hand, because you are on a mission, Madison. This is the way that you're serving your country and we are all in gratitude to you for that. Let's hit another one here. Subjectline says, remain anonymous God taking away something good. Hey, Grangeer Love the podcast. My story is short. My girlfriend and I broke up recently.

She's twenty one, I'm twenty four. We're both firm believers in Christ and that God has had a foundation of our relationship. We both prayed over it and had peace when we started dating and believe for greater things to come. But when we broke up, she believes that God is calling her to a time to grow and be alone with him. I believe her when she says that, But why would we both be given peace about a relationship It was just going to end a few months later?

This question thank you for that. Thank you for it, and you're going to remain anonymous. And I'll tell you, anonymous that what your question is basically a lack of trust in God, lack of trust in God's purpose and plan. It's like, it's like, Okay, I had peace about it, and we prayed about it, and this relationship started going good and then we broke up. So now she must be wrong for breaking up because since I had peace about it, and since I feel like God spoke to

me about it, then it's definitely right. But that's really just a lack of trust in God. It's like saying, hey, God, you gave me this plan and this purpose, and now that it's not going that way, that other person must be growing up instead of saying, Hey God, I don't know what you're doing right now, but I'm gonna be patient. I'm gonna wait through it because I trust you. Whatever is happening right now, I trust that it's gonna end up good because your plan is always good. And I

thought that this was the right plan. I was wrong. I was wrong thinking that this plan was your plan. But it's not looking like it is. And so I'll wait and I'll continue to praise you and trust you and trust your plan, and I won't blame her. She's out of love. This is finding God. Is just another one of the many excuses girls or guys will use when they're out of love and they need a break.

Because the truth is, if she was just totally into you and full of love, then she would find a way around whatever she's dealing with and stay with you. But that's just another excuse she's using. I'm not saying it's a bad excuse. I'm just saying it is an excuse because she's fallen out of love. You gotta have peace with that. What your experiencing, its heartbreak. You got to wait it out. You got to lean into your friends. You got to pray about it. You say you're a believer,

pray about it, and go God. I don't know what you're doing here, but I trust you. I trust you. It hurts. It hurts right now, but I trust that this pain is meaningful and it's gonna matter, and this pain will be used for something to teach me something or something I'm going to learn so that I will be better for you later on. That's the way you got to do it. That's the way you got to do it, buddy. Thanks for the email. Let's hit one more here. It says, subject line big changes and fake friends.

Hey Grayyar'd like to stay anonymous here? My question is I play football, was and some big things have happened with colleges reaching out and now people who aren't my friends, some people who I never see, people that used to bully me and are bullying my other friends are now trying to be my friends now and act like they have known me since forever. What is your advice to handle these fake friends? Thank you? Love excuse me? Thank you?

Gyegy Yeah. Question anonymous. Congrats on your football recruiting. That's pretty cool. What's your advice to handle these fake friends? Love them? That's my advice. What's your advice to handle these fake friends? Love them? Yeah? Stop judging them for being fake? Who are you to know? Who are you

to know? Just because you haven't known them before and now they're reaching out to you, you're automatically assuming that they're bad people and they're trying to cling onto you because you have some kind of new popularity or some kind of new value in football. Hey, let it go. Let it go now? If you see bullying, call them out. Now now they're your friends, or now they're your new acquaintances. Right, so now call them out and say, hey, man, I

don't think you guys should be bullying my friends. So now you have a platform to stand on to call them out. But other than that, I sit back. I don't judge them. We all I'll become fake friends at some point to somebody, whether we can help it or not. We're humans, and we're tribal creatures, and we lean into certain tribes and when people enter a new tribe, we latch onto them. And this football recruiting thing you're in

is like a new tribe. And so there's other guys that are like, hey, he's part of our tribe, now bring him in. That doesn't mean that they're fake. Even if they are, that doesn't mean we hate them or we avoid them, or we'd be mean to them or snarky to them. We just love them. It's very difficult to do that, but at least you can call him out,

if for bullying, we don't ever want that. But for the people that just came out of nowhere and they're reaching out to you, maybe they're just legitimately happy for you. You ever think about it, Maybe they're just really happy for your success because maybe they didn't see it coming and you proved everybody wrong, and they're like, man, that guy proved everybody wrong, and now all these colleges want him.

I'd like to get to know that guy. I want to know that guy a little bit better now because he defeated a bunch of odds that I didn't think he could have defeated. And I want that to rub off on me because there's things I can't do and I want people like that in my life. You ever think about it, maybe that's these guys just love them. I'll take a break and be right back. Hey, thanks for listening to the podcast. Have you tried ye Ye Jerky yet? Well, I'm gonna bet it's the best beef

jerky you've ever had in your entire life. It's a bold statement, but I'm willing to make it. Go to EEE dot com to get you some. Also, if you ever want to connect with me or get a personal message from me a video message, go to cameo dot com slash Grangersmith. I could give you a birthday shout out, anniversary shout out. Maybe some uplifting stories for you. Whatever you want from right here on my phone, I will make a video and send it to you customize to you.

You could also download the cameo app and search for me Grangersmith, or go to cameo dot com slash Grangersmith. All right, moving on to the next question. The subject line says, across country move. Hey grangear. My name is Chelsea. I'm twenty two from a small town in Nova Scotia, Canada. My boyfriend recently accepted a job in Alberta, which is literally across the country from where I am now, and my plan is to go with him and find work

out there. The closer it gets to the moving date, the more nervous I get about the move, especially because it's not like I could just jump in the car and drive a couple hours to go home. Any advice on how to deal with the anxiety of a huge move would be appreciated. Thank you so much. I'm a big fan of your music, flog podcast and beautiful family. God bless Chelsea. Chelsea, thank you for the kind words. Thank you for the email and shout out to Nova Scotia.

I love Nova Scotia. Here's the deal. I'm gonna just be tough love for you, Chelsea, as you know that I like to do on this podcast, because it would waste your time if I just told you what you wanted to hear. But the truth is, I don't think i'd move for a boyfriend. If you were engaged, you had a ring on your finger, I would start thinking about it. If you're married, of course you're gonna go

with them. So my suggestion to you right now is because you're kind of feeling this anxiety and I think that's kind of part of your instincts saying I'm not sure about this. I'm not sure. So now we need to pump the brakes and listen to this instinct for a second here and think about it with our brain and go, hmm, I don't know if I'm ready for this. I don't know if I'm ready to be away from my family and everything I know in all of my friends,

in every career path I've ever thought about. That's here in Nova Scotia because as you've listened to many of these emails, this relationship might not work out. Then you're probably thinking, no, this one's different, this one's gonna work out. Okay, fair enough. I don't mean to be speaking for you here, but I would at the very least, I would let some time go by as he moves out there, and then give it like two months and say, I'm gonna wait for two months after he's gone before I even

consider anything. And during those two months, I'm gonna look for apartments to live in. Don't go live with him. That's the worst thing you could do is move halfway across the country and live with your boyfriend in a brand new place. That's a recipe for disaster. I promise you that is just not gonna work. I would pump the brakes. I would let a couple months go by, research jobs, opportunities out there, research apartments out there, maybe friends that you have that you could stay with and

be roommates with. And that's gonna take a while. And during those couple months, you're gonna put together a lot of new thoughts, like, hey, this long distance thing actually can work, or you're gonna put pressure on him to go. Man, I really miss Chelsea. I should have asked her to

marry me when I had a chance. I'm gonna fly back to Nova Scotia, get on one knee and pull out a ring and say, hey, let's make this a done deal because I learn now after living all the way across the country, that I can't live without you. But by you just obliging and just going now just because you want to be with him, I understand that you don't want to be separated from him. That's gonna be hard. You're worried about that. But by just doing that,

you're just giving him a free pass. You're just giving him everything he needs. He's got this new job, he's got his girlfriend coming with him, there's no pressure. This is easy for him, but this is difficult for you. So don't fall into that. I'm not saying he's manipulating you in that way. He doesn't even know he's doing that. I'm just telling you, dude, good on him. Super easy for him. Then you're giving up everything. You don't have anything out there in Alberta, so let some time go

by before you make that kind of decision. Let him go first, see it by love you, missya. Let's plan on seeing each other in two weeks. Maybe you could fly back. Maybe I'll fly out there and stay it for a day. And then when you go out there, for a day. You're looking around, You're looking for a job, opportunity, maybe a future career. You're starting to have a conversation with him and like, hey, am I someone you want to be with the rest of your life? Like is

that someone you could see? And if he says yeah, maybe, then it's like boom, I'm gone, I'm back out here. I'm going back to Nova Scotia. But if he's like, yes, I have a plan, I'm actually thinking about, you know, trying to not here really soon. I don't think he's gonna say it that way, but then that's now you could start moving that direction. But pump the brakes. Give it a couple months at least, I'd say at least eight weeks. Let him live there by himself, let him

miss you. It's gonna be so hard for you. You're gonna be in Nova Scotia. You're gonna be missing him, You're gonna be texting him, facetiming him, really needing him. So you're gonna have to get over that. But avoid the temptation to say, forget it, I'm just going I'm moving, because yes, you're gonna miss your parents and your friends and your job, everything you have, don't do it. Don't do it. That's my advice. Next question, subject line says, how do I find God? The gring your. My name

is Coulton. I'm eighteen from Colorado. My girlfriend has recently found a new path with God, and she's been trying to figure out how that I might fit into this puzzle. She makes me realize that maybe I should find my own way to rekindle my relationship with Jesus and possibly change my ways to better myself and better others around me. And but how can I do that when my girlfriend in this situation has been on my mind constantly. Instead, we've been dating a little over two years. I'm afraid

that her path may be different than mine. Thanks love all your songs in your podcast, Colton. Colton shout out to Colorado. Thanks for emailing buddy. I'm gonna knock you around a little bit. I hope you don't mind, but I think people kind of expect that by now. You should expect if you email me, I'm gonna knock you around sometimes. So here's what you're doing you're thinking about. I'm gonna use your words finding God so that you

could better your relationship with the girl. This is totally backwards. We're talking, Colton, we're talking about life and death. We're talking about your eternal life in heaven or hell. That's what we're talking about. And you're saying, I think I might try to figure out this puzzle, as if God is a puzzle or a riddle or a or as if he's a path that we try to find and

it's hidden and we gotta unlock this secret key. And I think I'm gonna go do that so that I can get better with my girlfriend so that she's gonna like me more, because she's kind of putting pressure on me to get closer to God so that she likes me more. And that is totally backwards, Coulton, totally Man, I'm gonna knock you around here because I'm gonna say this,

this is a waste of time. You try to find God and try to find this puzzle peace and try to rekindle your relationship with Jesus as a waste of time. You might as well go get another hobby, go do something else, go find another girl. All those things are easier than what you're saying. Because what you're saying is impossible. You can't find a path to God. You can't work your way to God. Remember what I read out of Ephesians at the beginning of this podcast. Jesus finds you

through faith, which is a gift by grace. And your faith is dead if you don't see any fruits from it. If you see no works from the fruit from the faith, then it's dead. You don't have any so it's a total waste of time. Instead, you need to hear the gospel that God came into our lives two thousand years ago, became the perfect man, the life of example, a perfect example abolish the law, not because the law wasn't good,

but because we couldn't do it. So he comes in, dies on the cross with his blood and takes that sacrifice as a substitute for us because we couldn't do it. Three days later, resurrected from the dead. We have faith in that story, that gospel. We have faith in that we become His children. And then that faith results in the fruit. And part of the fruit is you're gonna

want to read your Bible. Part of the fruit is you're gonna want to go to church and be around more people that think that way because you feel radically different. You notice the difference in me over the course of this podcast, go back to episode one and listen to now episode one forty six. You could see the difference in me. That's not because of something I did. That's just the fruit of a faith that was a gift to me by grace from hearing that gospel. That's the

most important thing I could tell you. You try to get close to God, you'll never find him. Every other religion will tell you that work towards God, work towards God, get rekindled this puzzle piece, or however you said. But then Ephesians too says by grace you have been saved through faith. It is not your own doing. It is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast, for we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus, for good works which God prepared beforehand,

that we should walk in them. Buddy, you either need a new girlfriend or you're looking at this is completely wrong. And Colton, I love you, bro, And if I didn't love you, I would just say, yeah, man, just fake it, dude, Just fake it and get close to this girl. That's the way to do it. Just tell her. You're getting close to God. Just make whatever you can patch it up so that you can get better with your girl. That would be hating you, dude. That would be hating you.

If I told you that, after I've read what the Bible says, and after I've seen that the Bible is true through millions of reasons, I would be hating you if I didn't tell you. But you're going about this the whole wrong way. Okay, I think it was clear. Let me go to this. I have so many questions y'all, and I just I appreciate y'all sending questions. I love it. I love that you guys send me questions. Here's one that says subject line's scared of graduating college. Hey Granger,

my name is Billy. I'm twenty two. I'm a senior at Belmont University in Nashville. Belmont has given my Belmont has given my some incredible I think you meant me. Bellmont has given me some incredible opportunities that I don't think I would have gotten anywhere else. But I'm scared that I might not have a job in the music industry coming out of college. I'm mainly interested in music publishing,

but I'm also considering artist management. Do you have any advice forgetting started in the industry or any advice in general? Thanks so much, love the podcast, especially on long road trips back home. Your advice has helped me a lot over the past year. Best Billy, Billy, congrats bro graduating Belmont As. What a great school, What an incredible opportunity you have. Now, this is nothing to be scared about.

It's nothing to be scared about. It just depends on how bad do you want to be in the music business. That would be my question to you, how bad do you want to do this? And this is where I wish we were sitting around a campfire together. I'd say, Billy, how bad do you want to be in the music business? And you would give me an answer, and I would say, do you want to be in it bad enough to do it for free? That's the question? Do you want to do this bad enough to do it for free?

And go deliver pizzas in the afternoons. That's what I want you to think about. And you're thinking, you're telling me I just got a college education and paid all this boatloads of money so that I go deliver pizzas, and I'm saying, do you want you want it that bad? Then yes, because in the music business, unfortunately, it's really about who knows you. You notice I say it that way.

Instead of saying it's who you know, it's who knows you like, who could vouch for you, who believes in you, And so many times, man, that's going to come out of a free internship where you just go into music publishing or artist management that you're talking about here and just say, Hey, my name is Billy graduate of Belmont University. I've got a music business degree or whatever it might be, and I love music publishing. This is my passion. I love everything about it, and I want to start in

the mailroom. I'm going to work here at this publishing company in the mail room, and I'm want to do it for free because I want you to see how I could prove to you that I'm the right person for this job and that I have longevity to be in this business a lo long long time. Hey, I'll deliver trash. I will I will go out and empty the dumpsters. I'll bring coffee to everyone in the morning. I'll do whatever it takes, because Billy, you can't expect to just walk in and you get a plugging job

and you're just pitching songs to big producers. By you big artist, That's not where you're gonna go. You're gonna be an assistant or a trash man, or in the mail room, and you're gonna do it for minimum wage or free because a lot of other people want it bad enough to do it for free. That's a problem in the music business. I don't love that I have

to say that, but that's the truth. You're gonna have to prove yourself by being in front of them and doing everything great, showing up early, staying late, making the best coffee, always, making sure you're taking out the trash, your your your mail room is immaculately perfect. That's what you're gonna have to do. How bad do you want it? Billy? Is it that bad? Is it that bad? Question? Here? Subject line says, Hey, gret your my name is David. I own a barbershop and I'm looking to expand, but

I'm nervous to make the jump. I know I'll be responsible for other people's income. Any advice I'm taking on such a big task, David, congrats man, this is a cool opportunity. I would say anytime you're thinking about expanding a business, you need to do a lot of market research. You need to make sure that this is something that you can handle, and so you take it in small steps.

You're not just gonna jump into a big lease and fill up a bunch of chairs with a bunch of barbers that you're gonna have to pay and just to expect that things are going to go great, you need to have some kind of research involved in that and doing that, I would go to every big barbershop that you know and find the owner and sit down with them. So, hey, my name is David. I'm from a town, a couple of towns over here, and I really need some advice.

I'm looking to expand and you've done it. You've obviously done a great job. You have a really nice barbershop. Can you have your pin and pad ready, David? So it's like, hey, can you walk through step by step on things I need to know? And he's gonna lay it out for you. And then you go to another barbershop one town over and you do the same thing, pen and paper, just diligently writing everything, soaking it in like a sponge. Some of the stuff you're going to take,

some of the stuff you're not. That's okay. You're gonna get a consensus by talking to a bunch of people in this industry. So the last question is about music business. I know that very well. I don't know the barbershop industry.

So I would say, make sure you're not going to dive into this without knowing exactly how you're getting into it, without exactly knowing how much these chairs are going to cost, and how much these clippers are going to be, and how much how much I'm going to lease these chairs for to other people? And do I have other people ready to lease? Like, you're not gonna have empty chairs sitting there. You got to have people that you know that are ready to fill in and they've got cash

and they're ready to go. They got a monthly lease with you and they're ready to do it. So that's how you would expand is having full knowledge of the situation. And if you do, your anxiety is going to go away. You're gonna have confidence that replaces that anxiety. Good luck, buddy, I'm gonna come get a haircut there one day. Next question sepu Cline says first Love. Hey, Grange, I want to remain anonymous, but my girlfriend broke up with me.

We're both seventeen, and I still want to be friends with her because she's made an impact on me and I have amazing memories with her. We also go to the same high school, and I don't want anything awkward between us. The only thing is it hurts when I talk when I think about her. What do you think I should do well, anonymous? This is good old fashioned heartbreak, and this is difficult. It's difficult to live a life where you're constantly around the person that you're hurting for.

It's very hard. That's why I say, usually you want to cut them off, but sometimes in your situation, you can't cut them off because you're going to see them every day and you have mutual friends. So one thing to do is go to her with this and just say, hey, maybe write an email so you don't have to be face to face. Just say I want to let you know that I am hurting over this relationship and I am going to need some space because it hurts when I think about you. But I don't want to put

in jeopardy any of our mutual friends. And I don't want it to be awkward when I see you. So I'm letting you know right now that I'm going to put a smile on my face, that I'm not going to be weird around our mutual friends, that I'll be happy to see you in the hall, But just to let you know, I'm going to avoid you in any other situation, I'm going to block you on Facebook. I don't want to see what you're doing. It's nothing against you. This is me trying to protect my heart because it

really hurts. And then anonymous, When enough time goes by and you're doing this, you might feel like a robot at first, like you're putting on a fake smile and you're passing her in the hall. That's going to be natural. But after time it gets a little bit easier, and then a little bit easier, and she meets somebody, then you meet somebody, and then she slowly fades away. That's the story of heartbreak. That's what's gonna happen. Next question,

subject Gliine says relationship problems. Hey Grandeur, I'd like to remain anonymous. I'm from Sarahville, Tennessee, Severville, Tennessee, me and My girlfriend have been together for a year and we fight all the time, and we've now been on break for two months because old messages and photos on my phone, and I don't know if I should keep fighting for her or let her go. Love your music and all your shows. Say hey to Earle for for me. Anonymous

shout out to Tennessee, thanks for the question. You have been in a relationship for a year, you fight all the time, you're on a break because of old messages and photos on your phone. First of all, it's time to go through your phone and delete that stuff. Get rid of those photo, whatever you're talking about, get rid of those messages that hurt her, get rid of it.

I don't think that's gonna immediately help things, because you guys have been fighting all the time, and you're on a really long break, like two months is a really long break that sounds more like a break up. So you want to keep fighting for her? How bad do you want to fight? So, just like that guy that wanted to get into music business, I would say, how bad do you want to fight for her? Bad enough to change your ways and delete everything and start over

and stop screwing up and stop fighting her. And when she says something you don't agree with, you don't attack it. You just treat it with grace and forgive her for anything she might have done. Because you can't control what she does. You can control what you do, and so you just treat it with grace. You treat with love, with respect, with honor. You don't initiate fights, and when

she tries to fight, you just let it go. Just go hey, if that's if that's how you feel, I'm totally good with that because I love you and honor you. And inside you might be thinking no, no, no fight or argue? Are you no? You gotta gotta be right. There's no point, buddy, There's no point in being right when it's gonna hurt her or hurt your relationship. So either you're gonna break up and this is the end.

If you're not willing to compromise what I just said, or if you want to fight for her enough and she's that important to you, you're gonna change your ways, delete the stuff that you don't want her to see, and stop doing it and have grace for her and forgive her. That's what you could do. Which path do you want to take? That's my question. Speaking of questions, I love y'all's questions. Thank you for all that you send me, and I hope that I'll get more and more.

Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com is how you get a hold of me and I'll see y'all next Monday. Yeege. Thanks for joining me on the Grangersmith Podcast. I appreciate all of you guys. You could help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel, hit that little like button and notification spell so that you never miss anytime I upload a video. If you have a question for me that you would like me to answer, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com.

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