#120 This relationship is going to be tough to survive

what I do here. Like we're sitting around a campfire. It's just me campfire. I actually it's funny. I actually have a brush pile burning right now, right outside this room, so it's very relevant. It's like I'm standing around the the brush pile. It's burning down. You know, it's night, early early morning, kind of this this somber, you know, fire, And you walk up, you the guest, and you say, hey, man,

can I ask you a question. Something's been going on in my life, something, something that i'd like to walk through with you. Yeah, man, let's talk through it. The thing is, I'm not always right, you know, but but it's just a conversation. And that's what this podcast is. That's what it has turned into. If you have a question for me, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com.

And if you don't, you just want to listen, great, If you want to watch, some of you are watching on Spotify right now or YouTube, so you could watch that too. My life has been crazy right now. It's just I started a new radio show called After Midnight. So I've been hosting that and that's a nationally syndicated show, so you could you could hear it almost any place you live. You could find a stage in an FM station that plays it. You could also hear it on

the iHeartRadio app. And then I'm also shooting a movie. This is my first movie gig, and so I have a lead role in a movie. We're shooting here in Texas, and I'm bouncing back and forth. We shoot five or six days a week, like ten hour days. So when I'm not doing that, I'm hosting the radio show. When I'm not doing that, I'm shooting the Smith not touring a lot right now because of all this stuff, mainly because of the movie. And when I'm not doing those things,

i'm doing the podcast. That's what I'm doing today. So i want to get to the first question. I have one queued up, and then everything after that. It's open game, guys. I have no idea what I'm about to read. Okay, first question says and it comes from Corey says, Hey, I'm fourteen years old. I'm in the eighth grade. I live in Longview, Washington. There is a girl I really like, but she has a boyfriend and they are both my best friends. What should I do? What's up? Corey shout

out to Washington Longview. I've never been to Longview, but shout out to our listeners in Longview, Washington, Corey, Buddy, I would pump the brakes on this one. First of all, being fourteen, eighth grade, it's not like it's not like you know the clock is ticking and you're looking for a wife anytime soon, so you know that's not not here. But these are your best friends. You don't say anything about her being happy or not, Buddy, eighth grade relationships

just come and go. So I would imagine if you if you hang on a little bit, it's gonna last maybe a year, maybe six months, you'll have an opportunity when it's finished. This is not one of these scenarios where I'm gonna say, hey, you gotta make a move. You're gonna tell you gotta sit them down and tell, do you know, tell your buddy, your best friend, how you feel about his girl, or tell the girl how you feel about her. It's just not that it doesn't

make any better for any better for you. I'm sorry, it's not gonna make it's not gonna make your life easier hearing me say this to you. But right now, you pump the brakes. It's okay. You got plenty of time. There's other girls there, maybe they're not as good as this one, but just hang tight. This is your best friend's girl, and the girl's your best friend too, and it's understandable why you even like her because you guys

have a lot in common. You probably hang out all the time, so she's just in your immediate group of friends. So yeah, you don't, don't try to hit on your best friend's girl. Okay, that's just like man code one that the story might be different if you're you're thirty eight years old and you know exactly what you want in life, and you could see this and you have to say something. And even then we're gonna have to talk about it. But Corey Pump the Brakes brother. But

thanks for the email. Okay, let's hop around here. I've got a whole bunch of the queue. I'm gonna hit this one right here. The subject line says, I took my own life now what, Hey, granger. My name is Hannah. I'm twenty one years old, married to my high school sweetheart, and we have a one son. For context, I live in a ridiculously small town in Mississippi. I'm curious to know what do you think happens to a person after they commit suicide in terms of eternity I'm talking about.

I've tossed this question around my whole life, and I've gotten many different answers and theories from folks in different walks of life. I work in the emergency medicine scene, and suicide is an increasing issue we deal with. I'm a christ follower, and I like to think that God understands the trials of our lives and then he has mercy on us. Thank you for all that you do. Your wisdom is a gift that doesn't go unnoticed. Thank you, Hannah,

Thank you so much. Shout out to small town in Mississippi. Thank you for your service and the EMS. And I can't imagine being twenty one years old and seeing this stuff, you know, seeing everything that you see go through the hospital, including including suicide. And I'm so sorry to hear it. And I get this question a lot on the podcast. Suicide comes up a lot. Unfortunately, it's a it's it's it's a popular thing. And I have an answer for you. I have. I have an answer that I've thought because

I've thought about this. I've I've dealt with people in my circle before in this kind of situation, and so I've I've I've really I've had a chance to unpack this a lot. But it goes back to what I say a lot in this podcast is, and for everyone listening, the question is, we're talking about eternity from a perspective of a Christian. When you die as a Christian, you've accepted Jesus into your heart as your Lord and savior, and you through faith by grace. Okay, that's salvation. You're

saved by grace, nothing else. It's like, we get into this a lot on this podcast, but it's it's never anything that you do. You can't do it by works. You can't be a good person, you can't walk enough old ladies across the street. You are saved by the grace of God through your faith. Belief. It's another word for faith in Jesus. Okay, that's what the Bible says. That's it's not what I've made up or my theory. It's not my perspective. This is what the Word says.

You're saved by grace through faith. So when you die, if you have faith, by grace, you will go to Heaven. You will have we will all have eternal life as humans. This is once again I'm not speaking from my opinion. I'm speaking from the Bible says we all will have eternal life. But it's not a matter of if. It's a matter of where. Where will you have eternal life?

And there's two choices, heaven or hill. So if you have faith, I'm walking through this as slowly as I can to unpack it, like I've done in my own head about suicide. If you have faith and you've accepted Jesus by the grace of God, you've done that and as a result of that, as a result of that faith,

that's when works come to play. That's when in James two, we see faith without works is dead, and so a lot of people will turn to that and be like, you have to have works, because look, James says, faith without works is dead. But what that means is it means works as a result. So it begins with the faith. It begins with that salvation of faith, and then after that you are compelled through sanctification to live out a

life worthy of Christ after the salvation. Right, so you live it out, but you're not perfect, and you still mess up, and you still sin. The difference is after salvation, you hate the sin that you do and you repent for it. So you repent. You're mad at yourself. Say you tell a white lie. As a non believer, you might have a guilty conscience, okay, but you can move on from that. But as a saved believer in Christ, you tell that white line and you go, ah, I

hate that I did that, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry God, and I need to I need to make amends for this white lie. And the further you go in that walk, the stronger that sanctify sanctification gets, and the more it just nags at you. The Holy Spirit nags at you. And just gnaws, you know, just just rips you apart from the inside out. Slowly. It starts off right after you're saved. It starts off like you feel it, and

you're like, that's a weird feeling I have. But after a long walk with Christ for years and years, you're you just constantly want to shed it. You want to shed that sin. You want to stop saying that cuss word that you used to say, and you accidentally say it and it's just like your mind spikes and you go there it is again. Ah, I hate that word, I hate that I say it. I gotta get better.

I gotta get better. So you're constantly improving. And then when you die, you go to heaven, you're still sinning. When that happened, you still you're still a sinner when you die, when you're saved, you don't automatically become a never again sinner. Right, You're not perfect, you never will be. So where does suicide fall in this? Well, as far as I've unpacked it, and I've told you guys the facts of what the Bible says about death and salvation, so suicide comes into play as well. It's a sin,

it's murder, it's murder. You've murdered yourself. People that have gone through this A side note, people that have gone through this families, And I want to be sensitive about this because I have the utmost respect for families that have gone through this. And suicide so many times comes through men and women in the military through PTSD. I realize through that that many times you're injured, you're injured in the brain. You can't see it on a cat scan.

You can't see it like a like you've lost a limb, you know, like like some soldiers have lost an arm. Well, you get injured in your brain and you can't see it, but it's you're injured. You're affected by something that happened in war. And so what they call that instead of saying they committed suicide, they say death by suicide, meaning they weren't in the right mind. They weren't in their right mind when they did that, So they were they

were murdered by suicide. That does that make sense? So that's why they say death by suicide, and it's it's it's easier on a family to say that, and it's actually more truthful than to say commit suicide, because that that implies that the person had full intention of killing themselves in their right mind, and it's rarely the case. So back to back to sin. Murder is a sin

and that this is what suicide is, is murder. But we know through the Bible that that a sin is a sin and through repentance and salvation in this sanctification process, as you're working working out your your salvation Ah, then sinners can go to heaven. Murders can go to heaven. So you see what I'm getting at that My answer is, yes, a person that commits suicide or in the in the the polite way of saying it, that person that has died by suicide absolutely can go to heaven because that

does not that that didn't break our first rule. Our first rule is faith, grace, saved by grace by faith. So if they so the answer is in the long way that I've been saying this that let me sum

this up. The answer is if if you're if you're a person that you you've seen go to the hospital that died by suicide, had faith and accepted Jesus Christ, then yes, they'll go to heaven regardless of how they die, regardless of they if they were murdered by their own hand or someone else's, regardless if they died of old age or cancer at a young age. The faith is what saves you, not the way that you die, and

not what you did. The sinner on the cross next to Jesus, the thief, was a sinner his whole life, and right there on the cross, he looked at Jesus and he said, will you remember me when you go into your kingdom. Jesus looked right at him and said, today you will be with me in paradise. Just like that. That's it. It didn't matter how many old ladies across he took across the street. It didn't It didn't ever

he didn't. He couldn't have done enough to make up for the thief that he was, But that didn't matter to Jesus. It was the faith that saved him. So that person that committed suicide, if they had the faith then, regardless of the dark time they were in. Suicide is a terrible thing that the mind has to be so deprived and beat up and broken to commit an act like that, But it does not affect the salvation. Only the only the faith does. It's a good question. It's

a good question. I'm just popping around here. Okay, here's one. It says husband had an affair after wedding. That's the subject. Hey Granger, I recently found out my husband has been sleeping with a girl off and on for the last two years. They started talking while we were engaged, and then met one week after our wedding. I currently have a one week old with him, and I found out that the last time it happened was while I was pregnant. I love him and I want to move past this.

He said it was strictly sex and he wants to go to counseling. Do you think it's possible for a relationship to survive this? She didn't. She didn't write her name on here, so I'm gonna keep her anonymous. I'll start with you. I'll start with the final question. Do you think it's possible for a relationship to survive this? Yes? I do, I do. It's gonna be a tough road. It's gonna be tough road. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry that you're you're in this situation with a one

week old baby. I just the guy has a problem. Your husband, he has a problem, And this sounds like it sounds like this is this is something that will continue unless something drasticalpens. So yeah, take him up on the counseling and hold him to it. And if he is this is what I think our campfire talk. We're sitting around the campfire. If he breaks the commitment of the counseling, you need to let him know that you're

walking out of this. If he breaks the commitment to the counseling, and if he does, you gotta do it. You got to stick to you got to stick to the threat, stick to what you told him. You got to walk out. It's a toxic situation for for this this kid to be raised in. And I'm assuming I don't know your age, but I'm assuming that with a one week old baby, you're maybe twenties or thirties, and and there's time for you to rebuild something else. If this doesn't work, I think I think it's possible. But

it's tough. Everyone and listening knows this is tough, and it's it's rare. I I personally know people that have totally recovered from a situation just like this. I personally know marriages that are strong, fathers that are that are great dads, great leaders, and uh, it's it's possible, but most of us know more stories of this not working, of him not fixing this, and he needs to He needs to fix this immediately. This is not on you.

This is not your fault. This is not something you have done or or something you're not giving him or a way that you look. This is on him. He's cheating on you, and that's on him. That's a that's a problem he has. So you need to know that, and you need to go into counseling with him and and be open minded about it and pick a good counselor.

And if you bail on this counseling, if he says I'm good, I'm done, I'm cured, and the counselor says, the time's not up yet, that you need more sessions, it's time to separate for however long you want to do. It's time to it's time to to put some space, some time, some space. Take the baby. I'm so sorry. It is possible. Yes, all right, flipping down here, Let's

let's get one more and take a break. How about one that just uh, this is a generic one question for the podcast, says Hey Granger, I'm in a kind of a tricky situation to make a decision. I graduate college in May. I'm working at a sheriff's office part time, and I have the opportunity to go into law enforcement academy. I want to be deputy. I just don't know if I'm ready yet. I'm nineteen years old. I need some

advice on what to do. Well, Buddy, I think you're, first of all, think you're doing His name is Chandler, by the way, Chandler. I think you're doing the right thing by working at the sheriff's office. I think that's awesome. I always encourage people to if you're going to get into a field, go work in that field doing something else first. You kind of get in the environment. You meet the people that are doing it. You meet what could be your future boss. Even if you're just taking

the trash out, you're just working. Even if you're the coffee guy, you're making good coffee for everybody. Be someone that everyone likes in the office, and be someone that's useful for the office. I would start there, and it sounds like you're doing that. You have opportunity to go into the law enforcement academy. You want to be a deputy, and you don't know if you're ready do it. Do it. You're nineteen, it's time go into the law enforcement academy.

You don't have to go into the academy and immediately go into law enforcement, but through that process, you're gonna be with a lot of other people that are in your same boat. You're gonna be in that community, and that is key to so many things in life, to get into a community of like minded people. And I promise you in the academy you're gonna have people like you that are going I'm young, I'm still a teenager.

I don't know if I'm ready to get into this, and you're gonna go, h me too, That's how I feel too. And then they're gonna go, really well, let's talk about this together as we go through the academy. So then you're going through and you're going through tough situations that the academy will make for you, and you'll go through this bonding process through these tough situations and

you'll figure it out really quick. You're gonna know, you're gonna either gonna know two weeks in you're gonna go, you know what this is not for me, I'm out or you're gonna go. You know, I didn't think I was ready, But that's the whole purpose of the academy is to get you ready. Like that's what they do. That No one just decides one day they're going to

be a deputy and goes right into it. So that's what the academy does, not only physically and book wise get you ready, but mentally your mental toughness gets ready. You learn through that. That's what they're there for. So by all means, Chandler, do this, do this, take a break, be right back. This podcast is brought to you by Better Help. Is there something interfering with your happiness or preventing you from achieving your goals? We talk about this

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dot com slash granger. All right, diving back into these questions, if you have one for me, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. That's what I'm answering here, So you ask me, and I'll walk through it with you slowly, just like just like I have this fire cooking outside right now, outside of this room. We're gonna sit around this fire and we're gonna go through your question. Next up here it comes from Becky and the subject line says,

is anybody going to Hell? Uh? Oh? Here we go, Granger. First off, love the podcast the Smiths and all your values and several of your podcast you say, when we are all, we are all sinners, but we are or can be forgiven. So who's going to hell? Is the rapist, murder, child molester forgivable? If I steal a car and ask for forgiveness, do I get to keep the car? Pretty sure there's more to making it to heaven than just asking for forgiveness of our sins. Thanks for your input,

Becky Man. That's kind of parallel to the earlier question. So Becky, you're correct, You're correct, there is more to making it to heaven than just asking for forgiveness of sins. Absolutely, I didn't say that. I wouldn't have said that because that's just not correct. And once again I'm gonna say that I am. I am not writing these letters. I am just delivering the mail to you. Okay. I'm not giving you an opinion when it comes to this stuff. I'll give you the opinion when it comes to going

to law enforcement school, right to the academy. I'll give you the opinion when your husband's cheating on you, that's just purely my opinion. But when you're going to ask a question that's biblical, I'm not going to give you an opinion. When I know that there is a biblical answer that is the word of God, and that's what we as Christians believe that the Bible and the Bible

alone is the word of God. Christians believe that the Bible and the Bible alone is the word of God, and the Bible says that, yes, there's more and making it to Heaven than just asking for forgiveness of our sins. It's not It is faith in Jesus. You're saved by grace through faith in Jesus. You're saved by grace through faith in Jesus. Faith. Another word for faith is belief, belief, belief belief. The belief comes from grace. Grace is an

unmerited gift. Grace is an unmerited gift, and you're saved by it through faith. The faith is also a gift. That's the tricky part. You are saved by grace through faith, you believe. I don't think I don't think I need to say it a fifth time. I think I'm clear. Now. After faith, after after your faith, you you will repent, you will ask for forgiveness. You will hate your sin slowly. That's called sanctification. I'm gonna I'm just gonna go ahead

and say these things again. Even though I said it earlier on this podcast, I want to say it one more time, just to make make sure that this question is heard. Becky, and I think it's a great question, by the way. I think it's it's a it's a great question, and it's it's very understandable because it's easy to think, Wait a minute, you're saying you did. I hear you say you're saved by grace through faith. But what about murder. Let's I could just go out and

kill somebody tomorrow. You could just I could just go I could say, yeah, I believe in Jesus, and I go kill somebody and I still go to heaven. You won't want to you won't want to. And as we said earlier, James too says faith without works is dead. What he means is the works as a result of the faith. And if if you don't have the works, then you have to consider, maybe I don't have the

faith to begin with. If I'm willing to go out and murder and be and not care and not be, not be have a repentful mind about it, If I'm willing to do that over and over and over, then you probably didn't have the faith that it required to begin with. Right, It probably wasn't real. As James says, it was probably dead. And that's that's a that's a good sign for you. That's a good that's a good barometer because because and I could speak for myself in my life, it's you can't just say I believe. You

can't just say it. You can't just say it and it's done right. You can't be fifteen years old and you go to your church and you get baptized, and you go they say do you believe in Jesus? And you say yes. They said, do you accept Jesus into your heart? You say yes, and it's just lip service, and then you go out the next day and you're like, you're like pickpocketing people for cash and going buying and selling drugs and paying prostitutes. Okay, then obviously when you

said that at church, it wasn't real. It wasn't from your heart. You haven't dove into the word and and craving the word, like diving in and praying our fervent prayer, like God, God, God, save me, poor your spirit in to let me trust you, let me believe you, let me know this. Increase my faith. My faith is wavering here. I'd feel unbalanced. I don't know if this whole thing is real for me or not. Increase that. Show yourself, be present to me. These are things that you see

in the Bible. David says, this kind of stuff in the Psalms a lot. You see this, you see you see show yourself. Don't hide your face from me. Pour your spirit Him into me God. So these are things that you need to be saying if you have doubt and if you are still what did you say a rapist and a murder in a child molester? Because the answer is to you, is a rapist, a child molester, a murder forgivable? The answer is absolutely yes, yes, and all the ears of the podcast said, ouch, did he

really just say that? Yes, because we're all sinners, we're all dead in our trespasses. We all need to be reborn, we all need the grace of God to save us. And we can't rank ourselves as sinners. We can't rak ourselves and go, well, I mean, yes, I'm a sinner every once in a while to tell a lie. Okay, every once in a while, I'll steal a song on the internet, I'll download a free song. But at least I'm not a rapist like God. God hates the rapist.

So I steal, like I lie a little bit, like I break the first commandment, which is put God first, basically put God above all. There are no other gods above him. Well, I mean, I really love my job, and I really love this and that. But you know, at least I'm not a murderer, so God doesn't rank us. He looks at us all as broken sinners and then we're saved by grace through faith. And so I hope. I wish Becky we could have a back and forth a little bit, so then you could ask me your

second question. It's hard for me just to answer your question one time and not hear what you're gonna say back, but the people going to hell. To answer your question, So, who is going to hell? That's what you asked. The people that weren't saved by grace through faith, that's it. Those are the people going to hell, the people that weren't saved by grace through faith, not the people that committed the least amount of murder or the people that

never got into child molesting. Like, well, those people are definitely going to hell, and I never did that, So I guess I'm good. No, No, you and me are just as bad. And God is God. In God I God's eyes, Me and you are just as bad is the child molester. Can you believe that? That's it's crazy. We've broken all these commandments. We are rebellious people. And that's the beauty of grace. It's unmerited gift. He saved us when we didn't even deserve to be saved, and

that's why we worship. That's why we say God, thank you. That was a sinner undeserving of salvation, and you saved me anyway, And I'll worship you forever because of that, because you rescued me. I had no hope. Some people say, well, it's like God throws you a life life raft and you got to go swim and grab it, and then God pulls you in. I don't believe that. I believe it's more like you're at the bottom of the ocean dead.

You're dead. That's what dead in your trespassage means. You didn't have a chance to swim to a life raft, because if you did, that would be a work like that would be you're making the effort. You're dead. He grabs you the bottom of the ocean and plops you out on the beach and then breathe life back into you. That's salvation. You're saved by grace through faith. It is not by works. I'm just basically bouncing off of Ephesians two, eight and nine. Look it up Ephesians two, verse eight

and nine. I'm bouncing that just like versions of that back and forth because it keeps popping into my mind. Becky, thank you for this question. All right, man, where are we going? Now? Bring up the inbox and you never know where we're going? Right? How about this subjectline says decision making about a relationship. Hey, grangeer, I'm a new listener of your podcast and has opened me up and to see what the positives are in life. That's interesting.

My name is Drew. I'm nineteen years old from Illinois. My question is I've broken up with a girl I met in high school about three months ago. The breakup was mutual, but I still have feelings for her and we still talk to this day. The reason we broke up was because of the lack of time to hang out and her going to college far away from where I'm at. I've had a lot of time to think about it, but I would like to date her again. Do you think that's a good idea if we go

out again, or if I should just move on? And if so, what's the best way to ask her about what I'm feeling. Okay, Drew shout out to Illinois. Thank you for the for the question. Here here's my thoughts on this. We're back to my opinions. Okay, this is not facts, this is my opinions here, brother, she broke up with you, well, you say that, you say it was mutual, but she's going away to college and you guys didn't have time to hang out and her college

is far away. I don't think it's hard without you here. But I don't think she thinks this is mutual. And that's my guess, is the reason you emailed me is because you're not sure if she thinks the getting back together thing is mutual. Maybe the breakup was mutual, but the getting back together this sounds like she's going to college and needs some space. What you're feeling is totally natural to have this relationship and then you break and

then you're thinking, was this a mistake? Maybe I shouldn't have done this, Maybe I need her back. All I think about is her. Everyone listening right now has been through this where you're like at that rebound stage, and you know, the first time you want to rebound, it's always to the original person, Like you always want to rebound to the person that you just broke up with, and then when you find out that's not gonna work, you rebound to somebody else. That's always what happens. So

I got a bad feeling about this, Drew. I got a bad feeling that she's off to college and far away, and you guys didn't have time, and neither one of those two things is fixed yet. So you broke up for a reason two reasons, and neither one of those

reasons have resolved. But your feelings are that you should get back with her, and you're gonna end up right back in the same situation on once that newness wears off again, once that infatuation starts dolling down a little bit when you're back with her, because in our minds, we just have this, we have this feeling of the chase, like we want the chase, we want to get the girl.

I want to get the girl. But so many times when we get them, that's when you find out what's really going on is when you get them, when the chase is over, then what then does the feeling get stronger? Are you? It's the chase over and it's kind of no more cat and mouse, Like I got her and now we're back to talking about we don't have time and she lives far away, so I got a bad feeling about it. Drew, I'd pump the brakes on this one. I'd hold off a little bit. If you want to

talk to her about it. You guys were in a relationship. I don't think there's anything wrong with calling her and just saying can I talk to you about something? I just I still have feelings for you. I'd love to go on another date and just read her like read reader, take her temperature on this right and if she's like, I don't know, I mean we still don't have time, then you need to mentally then go yeah, yeah, I don't think she's into it right now. I got a

bad feeling about it, Drew. I would hold tight. I would hold tight. She's going to come home from college. I'm thinking she's going to come home for and then you're going to get some extra time together and you'll find out more than Thanks for the question, brother, All right, back to the inbox. Subject line here is depression and death. Hey Granger. First, sorry if I misspell any words or a bad grammar. No worries, brother. I love your music

and YouTube and podcast. The second part of the question is I lost my mom five years ago. My daughter started going into depression after my mom died. She's fifteen now. Three years ago she started to smoke weed. Two years ago, she started drinking. My wife and I have tried so hard to support her, taking her to counselors and doctors, till a week ago she tried to commit suicide. It was very scary since that happened. My wife and I are going back to church. How can I support her?

I feel like I'm banging my head against the wall. I too, have been struggling since the death of my mom. It scares me the thought of leaving my family again. My wife and I have gone back to church, and I feel lost. I've tried to hide this from my family and so I could be a rock for them, but it's hard. Give it to me straight, I could take it. Thanks for any help, Sincerely, Jeff Lansing, Michigan. Okay, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you lost your mom five

years ago. Your daughter, your daughter needs to go with you to church. You took her to counselors, you took her to doctors. I need you to, I need you to take her along. I need you to I need you to dive into the Bible. I need you to

read the Bible. Why. Well, besides the fact that it's the Word of God and it's our instruction manual as humans, but second of all, you're gonna find suffering, You're gonna find death, You're gonna find anxiety, You're gonna find restoration, you're gonna find grace, you're gonna find rebuilding, You're gonna find restoring, You're gonna find the love of God transparent through all of that heartache, through all of that death and depression and anxiety and pain, you're gonna see this

overwhelming lining through it. God doesn't eliminate suffering. He ordains it and takes us through the fire so that we can come out the other side with him. That's the power of God. There's no power in God of just helping us miss the suffering, like helping us avoid it or deleting it from our lives. Instead, when He walks us through it and we come out the other side with him, we realize that's the power of God. We made it, and we now we feel peace and hope

and rest and love. These are things that you could learn through those pages in the Bible. Church is a good thing to start with. It's a good it's a good kickstart taking Taking your daughter. You guys praying together, you said, look, you said, give it to me straight. I could take it. I would take her in. You didn't say her name. I would take her in with your wife, the three of you in your living room, and I would put I'd put my hands. I would make a circle out of the three of you, hands

on each other and just say God, we're lost. Since Mom died, we're lost and my daughter is going through a rough time. We don't know what to do. We're we're looking for answers. Where can we find them? God, give us, give us, give us your peace, give us your direction. Show us that your purpose matters. This path that we're on is leading to something. Show us that this struggle and this pain is not worthless. It's meaning full,

not meaning less. Show us that the death of Mom wasn't an accident, that is that just is a mistake. Show us that it matters. Show us that this pain, in these tears that we've had for her and for my daughter and through the struggle, Show us that these tears are not wasted. They're affecting us. They're growing us, They're building us for a purpose that only you have painted this beautiful picture of Do that in your living room with your hands on each other, and then see

what happens. Let's grab another one here. This one says subject line picking where to start my career? Hey Grangeard, my name is Josh I'm eighteen, just graduated high school. Earlier in a year. I am now being asked by so many people what am I going to do to start my career? And I say nothing right now. To

be honest, I just don't know where to start. I don't know if I should start with something simple like work at the gas station or fast food, or just somewhere plain and easy and to get the money flowing. I guess what I'm getting at is I don't know where to go from here, and I could use some advice. Josh Brother, thank you for the question. I love this question, and I wish you were with me at the campfire right now, because I would say, bro, here, take this

seat right next to me, let's talk. You're eighteen, you just graduated high school, and what to do now? Well, I would start immediately immediately, and I would if this was me, I'd get a pen and paper and I'd start writing stuff out. What do I like? What do I enjoy in life? And maybe one of the answers is I just like to be around Pete. I like to be around people that are like me. I like to grow. I like to grow and learn something new. Man. I like I like hunting, I like I love food.

He man I like, I got a kind of a wild side to me. I like working security or some kind of law enforcement. Hey, man, I uh, I kind

of I'm up for a world traveling adventure. The Army, the Marine Corps, the Navy, which, by the way, yeah, just saying, buddy, you know the Army, the Marines, the Navy, you know these, You know they have recruiters that are looking for people just like you that are going, Man, I'm Josh, and I'm I've just graduated and I'm looking I don't have an answer to where I go next, And they go, we got an answer for you, just

saying there's a local recruiter around you right now. But other than that, And I secretly hope you do that, Josh, and then email me back and say, and I went to the Army. But whatever you do, wherever you go, and that that pen and paper that you have and you've you've written down these ideas. Take those ideas, circle, circle a few options, and you get online and you start looking at some one ads, or you just go go to some businesses and just go are you guys,

are you guys taking applications for new employees? Maybe it is fast food, Maybe it is the gas station. Walk to the gas station, say are you looking for h are you hiring? Say it. They'll say yeah, we're we're hiring, and you go, well, here's my resume. I love to talk about this job. But whatever you do and wherever

you go, do your best. Edit if you if you go, say you go fast food, You're gonna go to Burger King and you're gonna you're gonna you're gonna start at the desk and you're you're taking orders, and then you're gonna graduate to flipping burgers. Crush it, Josh, crush it. Don't ski it for around, don't be late, stay a little bit later than you're supposed to get there, a little bit earlier than you're supposed to be nice to everyone,

and just crush it. Crush it. Count the money right, get the register closed out, make sure you're you you're sweeping. If don't, don't ever be sitting around doing nothing, stay off of your phone. Grab a grab a mop. If if you're not doing anything, grab a mop and start working until your boss comes in and goes what are you doing? And go, oh, sorry, boss, I had a little extra time, so I thought i'd mop right here. He'd say, Josh, well that I didn't ask you to

mop mop Mopping is not part of your job. And you go, yes, sir, Well, if you don't need me to, I won't. But I just I want to. I want this place clean. I just want to be the best I can for you. Hey, buddy, it's not a kiss up to do that. A kiss up is when you do that and you don't really mean it, and you're not really doing it. But if you mean it and and your heart is in it, like you actually do care about keeping that floor clean. That's not a kid.

And that guy your boss is going to go, Man, I'm only paying this guy minimum wage, and I could easily lose him to any other job. I better start thinking about giving him a raise, and I better start thinking about some kind of management position for him. I'm just saying you could work your way up from burger king to owning your franchise. It is definitely possible with that kind of attitude. Be there early, stay there late, never sit around, don't be caught on your phone, be

nice to everyone. Keep your clothes clean, keep your shirt tucked in whatever your uniform you're wearing. Keep your shoes clean. Don't track mud in there, sweep up, wipe the counters. Do your best. Be someone that they cannot replace. I've said that before on this podcast. Be the guy that they can't replace. And so when he has some kind of budget cut and he's looking to cut some people out, he's like, well, not Josh. I'm definitely not cutting Josh.

He's my best guy. And when he's not working the cash register, he's sweeping. When he's not sweeping, he's taking out the trash. When he's not taking out the trash, he's wiping off tables. And I don't even ask him to do that kind of stuff. Not Josh. Josh is my best guy. Be the best guy. That's your deal, Josh, that's what you're gonna do. I appreciate you guys. Thank you for listening. We'll see you next Monday. Yeegee, thanks for joining me on the Grangersmith podcast. I appreciate all

of you guys. You could help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel, hit that little like button and notification spell so that you never miss anytime I upload a video. If you have a question for me that you would like me to answer. Email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Yige