Every time you take the direction of the harder road, and then you take it again, and then you take it again, and you take it again. Every time you take it, you're separating yourselves from everybody else that's taking the easy road, and the hard road always pays off in the long run. You look back and you go I did things the hard way over and over and over, and that separated myself so that now I'm in a place that no one else could get to because they didn't take the hard road like I did. So do
hard things. What's up, everybody? Welcome back to the Granger Smith Podcast. This is episode one hundred and nineteen. Welcome back, mister Burns. Thanks for having me. Bernie Calculus again, long term guest of mine. How many episodes have you been on? Do you think maybe like twelve? Maybe more than that. I don't know. I think it's I think it might be double that. Oh really, I was going to count today. Okay,
but there's a lot. There's a lot. Yeah, one hundred nineteen episodes and I would guess you've been in between eighteen and twenty two something like that. Okay, somebody out there knows, So if you could comment below, Share, with us man, and that brings up a good point. Thank you to all the long term listeners, the people that that will tell me at a meet and greet or a show, or in public somewhere or on an email, they'll tell me that they've listened to every single episode.
I love that. That means so much to me because because I have certain podcasts that I, you know, listen to all the time, or are certain speakers our pastors that I listen to a lot, and I know what they mean to me. And so just the thought of being in someone's ear every Monday morning as like a routine Monday commute to work or whatever it might be that I love that. So we release at six thirty am Central Time on Monday mornings. If that's a good time.
Let me know if anyone, after so many episodes is kind of thinking maybe it should be earlier, like maybe I'm missing your commute because you leave the house at six, or is there a time I'm assuming it wouldn't be later. It would only be earlier if there was a time change, But let me know if anyone has any thoughts on that. Comment below on if you're watching on YouTube, or hit me up on social media. What this podcast is. If you're brand new, welcome. This is me and Bernie walking
through your questions in a very relaxed atmosphere. We'll call it like we're in a four door crew cab pickup truck heading on a back road and me and you I'm driving. You're right next to me, and we got someone in the back and we're on a long road trip. We're going to see a bowl game. And they're like, you know, what can I ask you, guys? Something something about something that's been going on in my life I've always wondered and I've kind of got something I'm wrestling with.
And then we walk through it as if we're on a four hour road trip and we just walk through it with you. That's what this podcast is, and if you want to be a part of that, we would love it. Email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Don't be afraid to write anything as long as you don't fill up too much of the space, Like just keep it, keep it as small as you can and still get
your point across and I'll answer it for you. Be as creative as possible too, guys, because some of the questions come in you're like, whoa, Okay, love it man, you can we cannot be surprised anymore as deep or as shallow. Yeah, totally, it's all fun. And let me just say thank you for letting me be a part of this. This is so cool. Like, guys, I'm just a regular dude. I met Granger like twenty years ago. But what I mean is, I'm not a celebrity. I'm
not an influencer. I'm just a dude. Right, I'm your dude, I'm your friend, and so I get to be here, and I it's a privilege and an honor. So thank you for letting me sit smartest and deepest thinker dudes that I know that's you. Well, so you're You're absolutely welcome. But it it is my privilege to have you on this microphone because you add so much value, you know, in life. And you taught me this a long time ago when you're raised in Boston who is now eleven eleven,
when he was younger. You you taught me this because you had kids right a year before I started having kids. And there's two ways to succeed in life, really, to add value or to take value. And so we all have to question ourselves and what am I doing to get ahead in life? Am I adding value to this world? Or am I taking it for my own gain? Because you could have success either way, but the choice is
up to you. That's good, and you chose to raise your kids in a mentality of adding to the world, adding value back to the world instead of take take take. You remember that conversation probably ten years ago, eight years ago. I have that conversation with Boston all the time still. So the first question here sub line is very unique. It says podcast question, and the question is my friend introduced me to this girl and I don't know how to approach her and tell her that I want to
go on a date. We've been talking for about a week or two. Now, can you help me out on this question comes from Braiden. Braiden man up, dude, take the hill. Be one of those dudes confidence. She's going to say yes if you and I've heard you answer this question on this podcast about confidence, be intentional and she's going to respond to that and vulnerable and vulnerable meaning confidence. Approach her with confidence, but in a way that's still you, like, don't don't put on a facade
like this brave facade. That's not you walk up boldly courageous, I guess is that courageous? You could be courageous and bold and vulnerable all at the same time. Brene Brown, Yes you can. Yeah, yeah, daring greatly. Brene Brown, great book, by the way, great motivational speaker. But yeah, be bold, be courageous, and be yourself and with that be vulnerable.
Meaning that means when you walk up to a girl and you you boldly take this step to her, you open your mouth to let words out, and if you stutter, if you fumble, if you shake a little bit, that's all part of it. And the right girl will see through that and go, wow, this guy's kind of nervous. He must really like me. That says something to the girl instead of like, this guy's a charmer. He just does it to everyone. He has his lines down perfectly, and I'm just the next one in order for him.
So man, just buddy, the good thing is you've been you talked to her for a week or two. I would make it simple like, hey, we've been talking for a week or two. I would I'd like to get something to eat or go see a movie. Have you seen the new Spider Man. You know here, I'll Braiden right, yes, okay, I'll throw this out there to you. Braiden, if you can be bold, courageous, vulnerable go up to this girl and ask her out. And Granger has come in to
do a concert in a city near you. He will put you on the guest list for a meet and greet if you bring that girl with you. Dude, you could be the one that like helped him. I Hey, you know, my buddy Granger is doing the show and we're going to meet him. Do you want to go? And she'd be like, oh yeah, and then they start talking more and there you go this question. I know I just signed him up for that on the fly, but this is a recent question, and I'll take Bernie's
challenge on this. Braden email me back to this exact email from your email so I know it's you and say, hey, Bernie promised that I can come and meet you at a meet and greet with this girl. The answer is yes, I'll get you tickets. I'll get you meet and greets when I come to your town or close to it, and use that as an excuse for this date. She said, yes, we're coming Okay, deal love it. Okay, Burns, I'm gonna we've got a list here, you're folder for today's podcast.
I'm going to read some of these questions at subject lines, and you tell me where you want to go. Okay, depression and death, pushing people away, picking where to start with career saying, hey, college, transition, dating, advice, love or excuse me? Life and religion? Did any of those pop out? For some reason? The college transition jumped out, and I'm not sure why I didn't go to college. I'm not in college. Great. I don't know if I have any
college advice. Great. Okay, well how about this, let's go with that one. It says, Hey Granger, I listened to your I listened to your podcast for the first time, and I absolutely loved it. I've been struggling with transitioning into college. I'm about to start my second semester and I don't really want to go back. It's hard because I look around and I see my friends loving college, so I'm wondering why am I not. I'm trying to compare and underst It's just a season, but I don't
know how it's supposed to get better. How am i supposed to navigate through this life transition and find my purpose. I hope this email finds you. Thank you and God bless Callie Calie like that name. Okay, so she's in, she's in, sounds like she's a she's a freshman. I'm about to start the second semester and this this email is current, So this is happening right now. She says, I don't really want to go back. Okay, So one thing jumps out that, I'll say real quick, and then
past Griz. You're looking at your friends and you're comparing. So our success success in life is is, you know, giving value to ourselves and worth to ourselves based on comparison to other people. Excellence is how we give ourselves value base based on our own potential. So stop looking around at what your friends are doing and think, like, man, they're having a successful college experience, And to focus on yourself, what is your potential, what are you capable of? What
are you seeing? And try to pursue that with excellence, and I think you're going to find that your whole experience kind of changes. So man, absolutely right, I think CALLI what's interesting is your friends. There's a good chance they're looking at you and thinking the same thing about you. My gosh, I'm struggling. CALLI seems to love it. But that's just a front you're putting on, and that might
be a front they're putting on. In fact, it probably is because because I did go to college and that second semester I felt that, like, oh, I want to be a musician. I don't really need this, like why am I here? In fact, my one of those early semesters, I ended up failing the whole thing because I was too worried about I don't need this, I'm an to be a musician. I'm gonna move to Nashville. I ended up failing out of college and moving to Nashville. That's
actually when I met Bernie. But then four years later I decided to go back to Texas and start a band. And in the meantime, I thought, I'm going to re enroll in the community college and try to get my grades up again and go back to Texas A and M. And when I did it the second time, it wasn't about other people around me, or that's the thing to do in life, or that's what society tells us we need to do. Is go to college. It was more
about I want to do this for me. I want to do this for me because it because I want to make it a priority. And so at some point, Cali, you're gonna have to do that instead of going. I'm just here because my parents told me I should, and all my friends came and it's kind of a party here, and what else am I going to do? I don't have any other options. You're dealing with that, and you've
got to flip that whole thing to go. No, you know what, I want to be here because ten years from now, I look back and be glad that I did go back to that second semester, because I don't think you're gonna look back in ten years and go glad I left and didn't go back. Sure, I'm glad because you're there. It's almost like you might as well
keep going. You're obviously getting funding somehow, like maybe maybe you're working for it through a job, maybe you have a grant, maybe you have a scholarship, maybe your parents have loaned you some money for this, but you're there, so I'm assuming it's getting paid for. You have this opportunity.
You're not gonna regret just doing it. But you need to make that switch in your mind that says I'm gonna do this for me because it's gonna I'm gonna learn something and if anything, even if not in the books, I'm gonna learn how to learn. And college and high school is a lot about learning how to learn. You either do that and there with people around you that allow you to stumble and fall, or you do it in life and you stumble and fall out loud with
your own bank account. Yeah, if there's any book nerds out there, email into Grangeer and tell me your book nerd because we can connect. But let me throw one to you. The Art of Learning by Joshua Whiteskin. Go read that book if you're a book nerd, because it's really good. I don't know if you've read that, but
I haven't really really good book. So can you read There's two different things that I'm kind of thinking here, But can you read the part about her friends again where they are having a different experience or what was It's hard because I look around and see my friends loving college, and I wonder why I'm not. Do you think that it's her friends at other colleges or do you think it kind of feels like she's looking immediately
around at her own campus. Okay. And the interesting thing is we have Burns here with us on the podcast who didn't go to college, like you said, but he's also very successful in his career right now. So it's not it's not you don't go to college equals be successful in life, because you can definitely be successful without it. So this is different and this is a different question for you to wrestle with. Yeah, I'm just I'm wondering
if this is a lack of community with this girl. Yeah, I think, Cali, because if you're really I mean, the books and all that is irrelevant really because I mean, you and I found community in Nashville and it was like this is our college, that this is awesome. We are learning in the school hard knocks together. So I think that there may be a lack of community and maybe some of the I know, the girls are different
than boys, you know, there's different things going on. But I think Cali maybe just consider, you know, pushing into your community of friends and like Granger said on one of the episodes recently about how are you like giving, don't just be looking for like what you get from your girlfriends and your community. But like man, how can
I connect with people? How can I serve them? I think that could change your experience and this is not And what I love about this podcast is that you take questions from everyday people just like us, and we're answering Calli's question. But these questions are relevant to anybody. So anybody out there that is struggling with man they're having I feel like they're having a better experience than
me or I just I'm not feeling this. I think the principle of community can come in and lack of community and how Granger has talked about look to the community and how you can serve and how can I look for the benefit of others? How can I engage in each conversation for the encouragement, excitement, and delight of the other person. You do that consistently, it's going to change your experience. Totally agree. I think I think this is a result CALLI of missing home, missing mama, living
on your own for the first time. It's all that's all combined and for what it's worth. For the record, when I moved to Nashville, college was really hard for me, and it was because I didn't have the right motivation. I was away from home, living away. But when I moved to Nashville and lived there for four years, and like Bernie said, we went through the hard knocks of life together. Going back to college the second time was easy. It was easy. It was a breeze compared to life,
you know. And so that says something. I think this boils down to one thing. For you do hard things, take the hard road. If you take the harder road in life. Every time you take the direction of the harder road, and then you take it again, and then you take it again, and you take it again. Every time you take it, you're separating yourself from everybody else that's taking the easy and the hard road always pays
off in the long run. You look back and you go I did things the hard way over and over and over, and that separated myself so that now I'm in a place that no one else could get to because they didn't take the hard road like I did. So do hard things, and remember this CALLI this is
probably just a coordinate. It's not the destination. I know it can feel like the destination, But if you can kind of zoom out a little bit and be like, Okay, there is something to be learned here that is going to prepare me for the next place that I'm going. Don't miss the opportunity to gain everything out of that experience that you can before it's gone, and so you can look back on it and be like, man, I took full advantage of that present moment. Life's a gift.
That's why they call the present great. Great question CALLI and good luck to you any of these other ones Depression and death question for the podcast People Pushing People Away. Yeah, let's go pushing people Away. My name is Claire. I'm twenty three years old. I live in a small town in North Carolina. I've lost so many good friends over the last twenty three years just from overthinking things. I've been hurt so many times by people I call friends.
I push people away once I get close to them because I'm afraid that they're going to leave if I do anything wrong, say something wrong, open up more, become more emotional, and when I push them away, I automatically regret it and try to fix it by making things worse and saying I'm sorry and bringing up past situations and then arguing with them I just don't know how to communicate what I'm feeling without it coming across as too emotional or someone who's expecting them to be there
for me all the time. I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't know how I can stop pushing people away that I care about and our friendship. I honestly am scared that people really care and do want to be my friends. I just don't know what to do, Claire, thanks for Sharon. Claire. On the last podcast that I was on Granger and I kind of stress tested this idea that these questions can fall into these three c's of answers right lack of community, communion,
or communication on the fly. I think a fourth one may have just hit me. Counseling, because I mean, honestly, sometimes if you have ingrained neuropathways in your thinking of how you navigate situations, it's gonna it may sometimes take professional help to help you re establish those pathways of thinking to where if you see this and you automatically go to this place of hurt and protection, it may not be as easy as I need to just be vulnerable and trust people. It's like you may, Claire, you
may need to think about. And again, this is for anybody out there who's maybe struggling with what Claire is. Yeah, it's a form of anxiety she's having. Yeah, there's no shame in asking for help and like reaching out to a professional that a counselor at your church or a professional therapist or somebody that can help you maybe navigate.
There's some deeper hurts going on. Yeah, probably from the past that have brought you to this place, and until you really take the time and work through those things, I think you're going to probably continue the same habits. That's great. That's why I love you on this podcast because that's something I probably wouldn't have gone to first out of the arsenal. So that Yeah, yeah, Claire, I think Bernie's right, there's more things than we could sit here.
We could sit here and tell you to be bold and be courageous and be vulnerable and open up from the beginning, and to pour into the friends instead of instead of expecting what they're going to give you, lower your expectations on what you're going to get out of a friendship and raise the expectation that you're going to put into it. So expect that you're going to be
the one doing the work. You're pouring in. You're the one giving thankfulness and gratitude for these friends and adding value to their lives without worrying about reciprocation, without worrying about what they're going to give you in return, including
emotional respect or or acknowledgment or or politeness. I mean, you just lower all those expectations because I think you're you're expecting that they're they're going to go, hey, Claire, Wow, you're a great friend, and thank you for picking up this lunch tab. I just you're you're you're really great, and thank you for spending it some extra time with me tonight dealing with my mother in law's problem. Thank you. You're expecting that, And when you don't get it, you go, gosh,
this is this is a bad friendship. I'm putting in more than I'm getting, So flip that and start thinking how could you add value to the friendship without getting anything in return? And usually that kind of approach leads to them pouring back into you, or it's it gives you a good discernment on who's a good friend and
who's not. But I think Bernie said it before I say any of that, though, I think Bernie's right that with you and your situation and the way you worded this, it sounds like some kind of wise counsel or professional counsel or therapist could help you, and I know there's one in your town, and that's probably something to consider at this point. H Yeah, great, great question anything you picked.
The next one, I'm going to go to life in religion because there's that word religion that we yelled at on the last podcast, last podcast, we said before I even read this, we said on the last podcast, religion is man made. When we all said it together to religion is man made, Okay, it's not from God. God seeks a relationship with us, not a religion from us. Hey, grang, your my name is Austin. I'm from Cambridge City, Indiana, near the Ohio line. I'm seventeen, trying to figure out
life early so I don't mess up. What is your best advice for never backing away from God? What is the best way to deal with people who dislike you because you're a Christian. Okay, so there's two main questions here. Let's hit the first one first. What was the first one? How do you so that he doesn't mess up. He's trying to figure this out at the age of seventeen. What is your best advice for never backing away from God? That's the first question, best advice for never backing away
from God? Well, you're you're gonna mess it up because you said how do I not mess it up? You're gonna mess it up? But you can mess it up and still not be backing away from God. Like we're gonna mess it up. It's just in our nature. Yeah, so I think you quite. Your question that you probably meant to say would be something along the lines of how do I keep the faith? How do I how do I not lose my faith? Right? And so so that that that goes back to it, there's a couple
of things. You can't do anything to earn your privilege from God or to earn your status with God. God does not look at you like like Santa Claus with the checklist and go, okay, Austin, how many things have you done for me today? Because you can't. You're you're
not righteous enough. And sometimes when we start thinking of God as Morgan Freeman sitting on a cloud, it messes up our mentality when you look, you look at him, like the Bible says, and he's the creator of all things, and he created He You walk outside, look at the stars, look at the galaxies, look at the Milky Way, look at the moon and the sun, and the Grand Canon in the mouth, mountains and snowflakes. And like I said on a podcast with Amber Eyeballs, he made eyeballs, Like
have you ever looked at an eyeball up close? It's crazy. It's crazy. And so that those are all forms of worship. And so what we're created to do, like we are. If you're going to put any kind of obligation on us, it's to worship. And worship comes in all ways. It comes in singing, it comes in praise, It comes in the acknowledgment of your your creator. When you walk outside and you see a beautiful sunset, you take the time and look at it, and you go, God, you created that.
That's incredible. You created art, You created music, You created love and humor, and and you you acknowledge those things in a form of praise. And we see this when we walk through the psalms in the Bible. You see this kind of stuff over and over like here I go again, grabbing my grabbing my digital Bible. Okay. Psalm forty two, David writes, as a deer pants for flowing streams, So pants my soul for you, Oh God, my soul thirst for God, for the living God. When shall I
come and appear before God? My tears have been my flood day and night. So he's he is so emotional over the fact that he is craving his creator. Can you say that, Austin, Can you say out loud as a deer pants for flowing streams, so pants my soul for you, Oh God, my soul thirst for God. Can you say that? And if you can't, then ask Him for it? Say God, make your presence burn inside me, the passion for you burn within me. That I need you, that I crave you, that I thirst and hunger for you.
That's a form of praise. And through that your faith grows and increases. Because no matter all the bad stuff happening around you, and the lack of understanding and the lack of righteousness that you have when you're trying to be good and you can't, when you always flip it and turn around and face God and go. But you, but you, but God, but before the grace of God, you created me for a purpose. And when you continue to look at that through your problems and through your sin,
that's praise, that's worship. Yeah, that's good. So I'm trying to think of an answer. I'm trying to put myself in seventeen year old Bernie's position, and what could I say? What could I hear a seventeen year old Bernie that
I would be like, that's okay. That impacts me, and Austin, I'm not sure I got it, but I feel like if you go back and read the parable of the sewer and the good soil and the sea that was thrown on the rocky soil, and the thorns and thistles and that whole passage, I think that there's going to be something for you in there, because because really, if you're wanting to stay close to God, you're gonna want
this firm foundation. You've got to have good soil. And so just maybe maybe read that and see see if there's something in there for you, and then look around and think think through it, like, Okay, is my faith in the right soil to where it can be nourished, to where it can be protected to where it can grow. I think this is like a trifecta answer as far as the you need what can I do to stay
close to God? You need communion first. You need community and you need communication and that communication comes in forms of really processing life's questions and stress testing the scripture as you're wrestling with it with you know wise counsel Austin, we're out of time for this break. We're gonna take a break and get back to the second half of your question right now. This podcast is sponsored by Better Help. Is there something interfering with your happiness or preventing you
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month at better help dot com slash granger. The second half of Austin's question, going back to this is how what is the best way to deal with people who dislike you because you're a Christian? Love them, Love them. That's that's really the essence of any situation as a Christian. There is there is no judgment, there is there is nothing but love. That's that's that's our requirement as stewards
of this message of the gospel. In Austin. You're seventeen, dude, you're that's Burnie and I were saying on the break that's you're asking incredible questions that I did not ask at seventeen. It didn't even really occur to me this kind of stuff. So that's, you know, kudos to you.
But if you're dealing with people that dislike you because you're a Christian, first of all, I think there's something missing in that question, like that they're seeing something in you in today's world, like this is not the Roman
Empire where they literally burned you at a stake. I think I think they're seeing religion and not Christianity, because if they were seeing true Christianity, it's just you would say I love you, brother, and instead of maybe they're thinking you're going to judge me, or that there's things in the Bible that I don't like and that you're telling you're thinking that about me, and you need to just dismiss that, because this is not about you judging
others at seventeen, and this is about you seeking a relationship with Christ and loving them. And it's going to be really hard to dislike you, Austin. If that's the mentality you have, Yeah, that's really good. I think Western Christianity has done a really poor job of I think that we have created a culture that views Christians in a way of like, oh, well, they're hypocrites and there's
going to judge me. So people outside the faith will look at you, you Austin, and automatically make that you know, notion without actually talking to you. So the best thing that you can do is draw near to them the best that you can. If they really don't like you and they're you know whatever, just let them haters gonna hate, you know, to shack out. I have a theory about this that you said Western Christianity. I think it's been
Christians since the beginning have messed up. And that's understandable. We mess up. I'm holding my coffee mugs as wretched center right here. I believe this is how Islam started, this is how the Muslim faith started by bad Christians
that we're judging and, like you said, hypocrites. And Mohammed has this dream under the tree that angel speaks to him and Gabriels gives him basically the truth, the New Gospel, and Mohammed is able to take that and go to his people and go, hey, guys, do you think that these Christians are hypocrites? And everyone goes, yes, do you
think they're judgmental on you? Yes? Well, good because I have a new Gospel and here it is, and it's easier to believe it's like, well, yeah, absolutely, because what they're teaching and how they're acting is two different things. They're total hypocrites. So I believe that you have to be right, Muhammed. So I think bad Christianity has caused all kinds of problems in this world, all kinds. Yeah, now that's a good point. But you know, to book
in the question, not everybody's gonna like you. I think even the people that don't like you, because you're a Christian, you probably have it way better than people in history. I mean, is that right totally? There's there's been Christians that have, you know, experienced just dramatic persecution because they said I'm a Christian and it's probably not gonna happen to you. So just check them off and keep the you know, keep trucking along. I think you'll be good.
I want to dive into this question, and we could hit this briefly because it was it was more of a statement and not a question. But the subject line is episode one fifteen. It says this comes from Blake, and it says, your faith won't help you. I'm in the army. I promise if you're in a firefight, nothing's going to help you besides great training and a great platoon. I was in for six years, so quickly, I just
want to say, and I replied to this. I hardly ever reply to emails, but actually replied to this and said, thank you for your service. Are you an atheist? Blake, if you're listening, you didn't reply back to that. I was going to actually engage with you here, but I'll do it on this podcast because I think it's very
important to kind of clarify this. You're saying you must have listened to the podcast and you're probably agnostic or atheists, And you're listening to me talk about faith and how it saves and you're thinking, well, it can't help you in a firefight. And I want to tell you a couple things. One, it absolutely can. It can. But and your question, your scenario, it probably you're looking at it completely wrong. Faith doesn't stop a bullet from hitting you.
It can. God can do anything, but that's not how he hardly ever shows himself to us. Your faith, first of all, will save your soul after the bullet hits you, So it can save It will save you after the bullet hit your skull and you die. It saves your soul. That's what we're talking about on this podcast. So we're not talking about it's going to stop physical harm, because so many times physical harm is needed. That's part of the struggle that we go through in these temporary tints
that we live in. So yes, you're of course great training in a great platoon helps you in a firefight. But please don't misunderstand that Bernie and I are saying that if you believe in Jesus that he creates this Star Wars force field around you and bullets bounce off of it, that is never what we're saying, and that's never what the Bible says. Like you could go through some sometimes like in First Kings, and you could go through scenarios where God did enter a battle, but that's
that doesn't happen like that. Okay. So I want you to understand, Blake through your question that I've never said it will prevent physical harm if you believe in God. That's not what I'm saying. God is much greater than that, and he has much greater interest in you as a temporary being on this earth than the battle that you're in right now. He cares about that and it matters to him, but he's not willing to just jump down and block a bullet for you. Got to keep saying it.
He can, but that's not Yeah, I think you've misunderstood what we said in this podcast. Yeah, No, I one hundred percent agree. I want to go to one that is says subject line question for you and Bernie. My name is Lindsay. I'm from Utah. I love your music and your podcast. I know we've touched on this subject a couple of times on the podcast, but no matter how hard I try, I cannot seem to find the answer that makes my heart happy. I'll try and keep
this short, but I'm looking for some help. My husband grew up in the LDS Church. My mom gave him. His mom gave him no choice, and my husband was forced to choose everything and live the LDS Church beliefs. Myself, I did not. My parents left religion and left it up to us for free choice. Excuse me, let me say that again. My parents left religion up to us as a free choice. My great grandparents lived a very Christian lifestyle, and thanks to my great grandparents we lived
we live the Christian lifestyle. I have a strong belief in God lower case G, and I know that there is a higher power. My husband, on the other hand, continues to shoot religion down if it gets brought up. He is negative. I think after my miscarriage in February, I was hoping to lean to God lower kse G and get the help we both needed to grow and
work through the miscarriage, but it backfired. I want my son, who is two, to have a religious freedoms I had while I was growing up, and to have a belief in God lower kse G. But I'm very worried my husband will continue to shoot any thought or speech of religion down. What is the best way to work through this. I'm very lost and I don't even know how to have the conversation. Thanks Lindsey. A couple things, A lot of things. Geez, there's that word religion. Religion is man made.
Living a Christian lifestyle will do nothing for you, lindsay, means nothing. I'm sorry. It might help you get some points in your community because you're helping old lady across the street, but it does nothing to go philanthropy, philanthropy, philanthropy. Okay, So I just I want to say that first that religion, religion does nothing for you. Guys, I'm sorry, it does nothing. If you're if you're of a different religion, then that's that's what you believe. But but but that's not what
you said. You said Christian. You said Christian three times in this email. My grandparents lived a very Christian lifestyle. And let me let me just clarify what Granger saying, like, it does nothing for you. It does nothing for you in reconciliation with your relationship to God. Correct? Correct? So you are wanting to let your kids have religious freedom. That sounds like it sounds like a government saying we
want our people to have religious freedom. But but once again, that will do nothing for your children, and we'll do nothing for your husband and for your husband to to grow up in the way he did and to look at to look at life like it's a judgment system, a grading system where if you mess up, then you have to get better the next time and continue to get better. Once again, I like to say it like a Santa Claus. No, not in good list, not in nice list. It does nothing. It does it does nothing.
There is one thing that Bernie and I would tell you when you're talking about Christian lifestyle. First of all, Jesus didn't manifest himself to Earth to bring Christianity to us. That again, that even that term that phrased Jesus never said Christianity. That is a man made term. That is categorization of that of that way that sometimes Paul called it the way the fault the believers. Paul also said, the believers a way to categorize all that is calling
us Christians followers of Christ. But it does not mean
that the lifestyle matters in your reconciliation. Like Bernie said, with God, I'm saying all this to just kind of like deconstruct your whole question and deconstruct your whole email, and just I would take your whole email out of love and hope, I hope you guys understand that everything we say on this podcast, Bernie and I is truly from our heart, is from a place of love, and it's not it's not my intent to come out here and be critical, but I want to take your whole
email and just completely mush it up and deconstruct it and say this, your husband and your children will be lost if they continue to look at it as religion like a like a man made system that and this is what Jesus came and he just he did. He said this to the Pharisees over and over. He deconstructed and he he wrecked their world when they were trying to live a religious lifestyle to please God. Jesus came
and said, what are you doing? He flipped tables and he just he completely disorganized everything that they were trying to do because he was saying, you guys got it all wrong. And so that's what I'm telling you, lindsay, he got it all wrong. The thing is leading your husband and your children to Christ, to Jesus to fall madly in love with him. As the creator, the one true God manifested on earth two thousand years ago in the flesh, living the perfect life as an example. He
came to save sinners like me. I'm corrupt. I was born with a sinner's heart, a sinner's soul, and Jesus came to save that for any that choose him to believe in him. And he died on a cross and was killed in the most horrific way. Crucifixion was a horrific form of capital punishment by the Roman Empire. And
he died three days later. He was resurrected under in front of five hundred plus witnesses that saw this and wrote it down and scattered across the globe to write down these stories so that we could have at the Bible is a collection of these stories that we have that we have over five eight hundred copies of the original writings from the first century. It is unbelievable that we have a Bible today that has lasted through the tyranny and corruption, but we have copies. We have the
Dead Sea scrolls. I'm going way off on a tangent to tell you that all that matters for your husband and your kids and you and me and Bernie and anyone listening is loving Christ, learning him, getting a relationship with him, going to him and admitting that you're a sinner, telling him, telling him that you have no other hope, that you're in need of a savior. Lindsey is that
her name? Yes? So yeah, lindsay. I think until you just in hearing your email and kind of where the position of your heart is and where your husband's heart currently is, until you see yourself on the cross and you look over and see Jesus and you say, will you remember me when you're in your kingdom, and you hear him say I tell you this today, you will
be with me in paradise. Nothing else matters, No advice that we can give you, no eloquent speech or charismatic language, anything we can say, doesn't really matter until you, in your heart of hearts, are moved by the spirit to actually view yourself as that guy on the cross about to die. So he didn't do anything good by any religious or worldly or Christian or whatever standards that we could say. This is a true story he's telling by the way that really happened. The thief on the cross
next to Jesus. The thief on the cross, he was a thief like and he was being murdered, and he looked over in his last moments and just his eyes were open. He was like, he's the Christ, He's the one. I'm not even worthy enough to ask you to go and save me, but could you just remember me and Jesus, Hey,
today you will be with me. And I guarantee you the moment that you get to a place in your heart where you see yourself in that light that nothing you can do is worth anything that you don't deserve it, and you look over and you hear him whisper that to you, Oh, the life that you will then experience
is gonna be awesome. And the words that you hear from Granger and I and from other people that you start to hear that are just soaked in the scripture, they're gonna start to resonate with you in a different way. Right now, it's not going to resonate because your heart's not there. So so good that story. So there's there's two thieves on the cross. There was three men that were crucified that same day, Jesus was one of them, and then there was two thieves on either side of them.
So one thief was laughing the whole time, like, hey, if you really are a son of God, save yourself and save us. Come on, man, what you got? What you got? Mocking him, and everyone was mocking him around except for the other thief on the other side. That's not what he said. He truly looked at him and just said, will you remember me when you go into your kingdom. That's all he said. And we know from that story that he was saved and nothing else mattered.
Nothing he did, no amount of merit that he did, no amount of teaching or learning. All he did was put all of his belief. He gave everything to Christ that day. So imagine this, lindsay, imagine your You're at your house in Utah. You don't say what town you're in Utah, right, and you get a phone call from some kind of security guy and he says, there's a prince in Persia. He's the richest man in the world.
He is the richest. I'm just making this up. There's a prince in Persia who's the richest man in the world. He has king a massive kingdom and palaces and castles and servants and this entire kingdom. And he's gonna come to your house for dinner tonight. And you go, what, this prince is coming to my house? Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah,
he's coming. Can you make dinner for us? And you go yeah, and it's and he's gonna come in thirty minutes, like no time to go to the grocery store, and so you just you frantically go around the house and you start cleaning up, and you're like vacuum and you start wiping the tables down, and you open the fridge and all you have is last night's left over fried chicken, and you quickly pull it out and you put it in the microwave and you start heating. And then you
see these like SUVs all blacked out. They start pulling up security and suits and radios and they all walk out. They're talking, they got their sunglasses on, they're looking around,
and they start coming. Then and more and more limos are pulling up, and you're like heating up the fried chicken and the microwave and you're like lighting candles to make it smell good, and you're like running to your closet and you start putting on some like the nicest clothes that you have, and the first security guys come in, and then the entourage, and then here comes the Prince. He's just dressed in white, and he's got all these jewels,
and he's just perfect. And he walks in and he goes to your table, your little table, and he sits down in the chair, and you go, what could I do? What could I do? Do you think at that point that prince could look at you and go, I wish you had done more for me. I wish you had made better food. He's the prince. He has everything. He has everything in his kingdom. There's nothing you could do to him. There's no food that he hasn't eaten, or no delicacy that he hasn't indulged in. There's no fancy
table that he hasn't sat in. But he's coming to yours and all you could do. All you could do is bow to him and say thank you for blessing me in my house with your presence. That's what you're doing to the creator of the earth, The creator of the universe is coming to your house. It says this in John fourteen He's coming to your home, and he will make a home with you in your where you are in your life right now, the thief on the cross,
where he was right then in his life. He's coming to you to make a home, and all you have to do is open the door and let him in. There's no food, there's no clothes, there's no special chair. You only have what you have to offer. That's what's happening to you right now. That was so good man. If that's not in the book, that needs a book, Man, you got me, good night, I just made that up. Goodness, gracious, that was great. Well, I think that's all the time
we got to that. I don't know how you tough that you go anywhere from that. That was so good man. Well then, hey Burns, thanks for coming today. Man, Thank you guys for listening. It's such a privilege to have you on the podcast. And thank you guys for emailing. I hope that the tough love wasn't too tough, and I hope you don't take offense to anything we said.
But we're we're trying our best to give you the truth that we know, that we believe, that we that we're so passionate about and I hope that you could take that with a grain of salt and hear that from from two centers, two desperate men just just wanting to Like Vodi Bacham says, we're just too beggars trying to tell you where we found bread. That's good man. We love you guys. Thanks for joining me on the
Granger Smith Podcast. I appreciate all of you guys. You could help me out by rating this podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel, hit that little like button and notification spell so that you never miss anytime I upload a video. If you have a question for me that you would like me to answer, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com, Yigi