#118 Will you ever be good enough?

we're here, dude. Thank you for guys. Bernie drives like an hour to come here to do this, and you've done countless episodes helping me through this, walking through this, So dude, just thank you for coming up here on a weekday. I know you have family and work and a lot and every thing else you got going on in your life. And you choose to drive an hour, be on the podcast for an hour, drive back for an hour. That's a really big deal to me. I

was thinking about that this morning, So thank you. Yeah. Absolutely, It's a privilege, man, It's a privilege, and I don't take it lightly either. So you know, every time that an opportunity kind of presents itself, you got to take advantage of it because you never know when the next one will come. You know. Yeah, we're Bernie and I go back two decades at least. Now we're over two decades of being friends. I trust him. I trust him

with any question I have in life. And so that's why I like to bring him on the podcast, because I trust that he's going to give you guys, the same advice that he would give me. And that's what we do here. That's the nature of this podcast is we answer your questions as if we're sitting around a campfire. We're just you know, the night's getting late. Bernie and I are sitting in you know, on two stumps, and you walk up, you the listener, walk up and go, hey,

could I could I ask you guys something? And we don't have a timeframe, we don't have a limit of how quick we have to say it. We just go, yeah, what you got and you could ask us anything. It could be about life or love or careers or money or whatever the subject might be you ask us. We'll walk through it. We're not always right, but we'll give it to you straight. We'll shoot you straight. Sometimes it might be a little tough, love, but we'll give it to you the best that we know. How, take that

with a grain of salt. If you have a question, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. I've noticed over the last year, and maybe even you know prior to that. I mean, you guys are bringing the heat with your questions these days, some hum dingers and we're like, whoa, Okay, we got more of that today. Okay, well that's great. I haven't done I haven't looked at these very much besides just skim them and throw them into a folder. And Bernie, you have your own folder now because people

love you on this podcast. But that's what we do. I throw them in here. We don't have notes. You could see our table if you're watching on Spotify or YouTube, you see we don't have notes or quotes or anything like that. So we're just gonna walk through it as

it comes. So let's get into it. So before we get started, I had this thought as I was driving up here, which that space you know, on the drive here, on the drive back, you know, it's really a time of just solitude and the road and anybody out there who's you know, driving trucks overnight or just has a long commute. You understand what it can be like to just be out on the road, have nothing but the road in front of you and your thoughts, and be able to just kind of sit and think and process

and everything. So I was listening to the podcast of this buddy of mine who's a country singer, and he did it by himself last week as you but as you were answering these questions, and I know we've talked about this before, I started to wonder if each one of these questions could be answered with three answers and the first one, and they happened to all start with C.

I didn't plan that, but community, communication, and communion. So what's happening in these questions is there's either a lack of communication, there's a lack of community, or there's a lack of communion with God with the scripture, right, So I don't know if this is true. I just thought about it coming up. So as we're going to go into it today, we're gonna see, like, hey, maybe burns way off, maybe there's something to those three and maybe we can kind of dig in and wrestle with that

a little one. Let's dig into that and we'll call it C one, C two, C three all right, and see if it falls And if any question or all the questions fall into one of those three categories. I think that's interesting. Yeah, And I think I think you're absolutely right whether there's three or there's four, or there's two or I but I do think there are you could you could list on one hand. I think you're right, you could list on one hand the answer to every

question in life. Yeah, there were some questions last week that were good, the one about the blue check mark and like did you comment to the people? I thought that was really good. And there's some other kind of like higher level questions, surface level questions that I think we would love for you guys to ask, right, because before we jump into the deep end, sometimes it's good to be like, oh yeah, and it's good information for everybody to know. And they want to know, you know

about Granger. Like, hey, so twenty twenty two, here we are. What are you excited about this year? Yeah? I got I have a that you can talk about because I know it's I've got some secret things going on and tell you what about Yeah, but what can you tell us that you're excited about? So? By the way the blue check question you're talking about, that would be communication, right,

you could put that under that category. Yep. But yeah, I'm man, I'm I'm super excited one for this podcast going into going into twenty twenty two, with this podcast really sizzling as far as you know, it's always ranked really high on all the podcast rankings now and all the all the platforms, and it wasn't in twenty twenty one. It was like just starting to get heat. So now going ahead and fulfilling that the you know, knowing that it's a high ranked podcast, fulfilling that and and just

establishing that more. I think. I don't want to say there's pressure in that, but there's a responsibility and you kind of that's what you said earlier. There's there's there's a responsibility to fulfill that it's worth of this podcast. So I'm super excited about that. And actually, to help a little bit, the next question, the one I have queued up first, will help with all this, Okay, but yeah, so let's dive into it. Your questions Grangersmith podcast at

gmail dot com. The first one, subject line, this is the only one I've read. Subject line says question for the best podcast ever, like, yeah, yeah, you got me man, click bait, you got me, says Hey Granger, I'm wondering why you left your record label and moved to a new one. I love listening to the podcast every Monday morning on my way to work. I've listened to every episode. Your answers are always so good to help me because the best version of myself understand the best version of myself.

Thank you. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year. This comes from Mason in Wisconsin. Ye ye, So Mason has heard me talk about somewhere that I left the record label, but I did not join a new record label, so that Yeah, so I left my record label. And this is going to kind of connect to your question Burns, but I I just wanted to I've been with the record label for for several years. Now. Did you knew this? Right?

You knew this. I I've actually been talking to you speaking of advice for probably three years, because it was before RIV I remember talking to you about this. I would I was just going, Bernie, I don't know if I should stay on a record label, and some people would think why. I mean, that's like a dream to get a record deal and it is, and it was a dream, and it was a great label and great friends, and they worked really hard and I have great relationships

there still at that label. But I felt like overall my life and my career was taking a shift. And the record deal primarily is there to get you on the radio, and with that comes a radio game that you need to play, that you need, you need to satisfy radio. And ironically this year I have a radio job. Now. It's so ironic how the tables have turned. But but I left because I needed to free up some space.

One for this podcast, one for the preaching opportunities that that I'm trying to get, and I'm writing a book or just started the process of that and needed to free up some time for that. This. I didn't know this radio gig was going to come, but that happened right after I left the label. I got this this radio job, which is going to take up time, so

I'm thankful for that. And then there's there's some other projects that I just have going on that I just felt like I needed to free up some space because mentally, it takes a lot of effort, a lot of time, and a lot of travel to push a radio single up the chart. It's more than just a good song. It's it's saying the right things to the right people and and you know, going going out to dinner in

their hometown and doing free things for them constantly. And like radio tours, right, you have to be promoting it all. You have to always be so like if I go to a tour dight in Saint Louis, I got to show up early and go meet the guy at the station and be super nice to him. And that's a young man's game. And I've loved it in the past. I love the personal aspect to that of getting to know someone at a personal level. But after doing it for so long, I just I need to free up

my space. I need to free that up. And so that was a decision I had to make, and I was talking to Bernie about it for years. It first, when I first approached you about it, it was, Man, I feel like writing a letter. Do you remember I told you that, like a long time ago. It's like, I want to write a letter and just express the way I feel and the way I feel about radio and the way that songs go up charts. And it's not in a jaded way. It's just it's not about

a good song, right is it some level? But it's some level you once you hit a certain threshold. All the songs are good above a certain threshold. And then that's thousands and thousands of them, and the charts are only going to get forty of them. So I needed to free up space. So yeah, Mason in Wisconsin, that's the best scenario I can give you. Now what it doesn't mean. It doesn't mean I'm gonna stop making music, stop making album stop touring. None of that's gonna change,

which is the great thing about it. And part of this decision was based on, well, I don't have to give up making music. In fact, I'll make more of it and different kinds of it. I could put out a gospel record and not skip a beat. I could write a new song and have it out to you guys in two weeks. There's no more red tape that would come with the record label. That's a big deal. So touring wouldn't change. Making music wouldn't change, makeing albums

wouldn't change. In fact, it would be more of it. So it's a benefit to you guys. And if I wasn't even talking about it at all. You wouldn't even know any difference, right, So yeah, so that's gonna be a big part going into twenty twenty two record label lists. So of all of those things that you just mentioned, making a new record, writing a book, touring, what is the most exciting to you? What are you most excited about? What's the most appealing to like, kend of this next year?

The book? For sure? The book. It's a it's a it's above and beyond all the other things writing this book. Have you talked to you know, folks about it, like publicly? No, I know we have, but not really. I just started just announce this like right now. Yeah, I haven't really even announced it. But I'm with a literary agent, so

we don't have a publisher. So I got with a really good agent and through the recommendation of lots of authors that are that have success that I know on Instagram and you know, dm them, and got some really good advice to get an agent first before we get a publisher. So then I work with the agent on refining my thoughts so that I'm not just looking at a blank page. Because it seems impossible to look at a blank page. So I talked to this literally and

they were able to sit down with me. We had coffee two or three times for two or three hours each time and just refined everything that's in my head and go, okay, well, here that they could give me suggestions on here's how you start, here's where you're gonna go, here's where it's gonna climax, and then here's how you finish. That way, I'm not looking at a blank page anymore. I'm looking at a template. I'm like, great, so that's

where I am right now. I finished the template, We finished the proposal, and then once I actually start diving into the writing, then I'll be talking about it a lot more cool. But that's that's what I'm most excited about. And that takes That's gonna take a lot of time. Yeah, so as it should. Yeah, do y'all hear that, Guys, get excited. Twenty twenty two Granger Smith's first book title to be determined, worked on in twenty twenty two, probably

most likely released in twenty twenty three. Okay, yeah, dang, that is a lot of time. I know, I know. Okay, back to these questions. All right, let's see, where was that one I gotta go back to that one and delete it. I'm gonna turn my Chick fil A water this way in case I need to take a drink. I guess you have this right here too. Yeah, they noticed my coffee cup today. Parker got me this for Christmas. Nice wretched center. That's my coffee cup today. Do you

want to go, Bernie? You want to go deeper? You want to go another surface level? I want to go wherever you want to take us, Griz, I got a feeling where you're gonna say this, But well, let's look at this one. There's not many light ones on here today. So the subject line of this one says, I'm confused. Hey Grande, I'm a new listener to the podcast and I love them. My boyfriend now X and I recently broke up after dating for almost a year. We've been

seeing each other for about two years. He came back two weeks after breaking up with me. Wanted to start from the beginning and go slow but remain exclusive. There's a voice inside my head that keeps trying to tell him that I'm conflicted. What should I do? By the way, I love him unconditionally and he does me in return. Sincerely, Morgan from Florida, and she's twenty years old. A couple things jump out at this one, one that the unconditional love that she has for him is impossible and he

has for her. It's impossible. Yeah, Morgan, that's impossible. I get the sentiment. It's like, I love you forever, unconditional. It's like no matter what. Right, Yeah, but it's not true. I could sit here with you, Morgan and give you some conditions to make it unc to make it not unconditional. You know, he puts a gun to your head and says, love me or die. Yeah, Okay, Yeah, I think you just broke a condition of the unconditional love. I don't

think you're going to say I love you unconditionally. So yeah, and we can go on and on, but your love for another human is not unconditional. Be careful with saying that, right. I do believe though, as far as unconditional love, I do believe a parent love for a child should be unconditional. I don't believe a child's love for a parent should be unconditional. Right. It's interesting. Yeah, I think about this a lot. It's like a parent when you bring a

child into the world. As a parent, you are responsible forever for loving that child no matter what they do, no matter how they reject you, no matter what they say to you. You love. Your job is to love them back to you, right like the prodigress son. But a kid doesn't have to feel that way because there are things a parent can do to the kid to say, you know what, I think I've fallen out of love

with you, dad or mom. And that's okay, it's interesting, do you think So let's stress test this a little bit. So do you think that? Because really it's the definition of love, Like what are they saying? Unconditional love? What does that love look like? Because there can be times when a child has a parent that is abusive, like maybe not in the earliers, but starts lying to him,

deceiving of all of these things. Can that child still love them as man, that's my dad, I love him unconditionally as my dad, but as a person, as a friend, as a someone in my sphere of influence, I now have to extend further boundaries to that person in order

to love them from a distance. Like what, Yeah, that's interesting, And the same thing you could flip the script on, like if a kid is if your child, you know, goes off the deep end and like starts killing people and starts you know, this is like, oh my gosh, this is not the kid I raised. What in the world happened? I still love you, but one there has to be boundaries. First because you're in jail, yeah, and

I'm scared of you. But secondly, emotional boundaries is there's still the ability for a child to love a parent in the midst of that same thing unconditionally, with the boundaries kind of help that sentiment at all. I think that's a great point. And it's this idea that you know, first and foremost that the parent brings the child into the world and the child doesn't have a choice in

the matter. That's true. Yep, that's a good point. But I totally understand the idea of loving as you would love any other human or love love your enemy, or love your neighbor. There's that kind of love. And then there's the parental love that you have when you when you lose a father and you grieve and grieve and grieve because of how much you loved him or if you didn't really and he dies and you go, you know, I didn't really know my dad. I'm not really affected

by this loss. You could still love him like you would love a neighbor or an enemy, like a biblical love. But it's not the kind of love that would make you grieve and make you say I'll do anything to have for my dad. Yeah, and it's not. Yeah, it's not the same kind of love typically associated with the phrase unconditional love. Yeah. Right, So here's another. So let's flip the script on that. So now you have a parent that loses a child and says, you know, I

didn't really know my child. It doesn't really affect me that they died. That's weird. That sounds weird. It doesn't sound weird for a daughter to go my dad died. Yeah, he lived in Arizona. I didn't really know him, so I don't really care. Yeah, but you would never say that as a parent. Yeah, my son died. He lived in Arizona. I didn't really know him, and I don't really care. Yeah, what's the difference in that? But there is one. There is one. There definitely is one. So okay, sorry, Morgan,

back to your question. But I will I will say with with Morgan Mason, who is this, This is Morgan. Morgan. Mason was last Morgan. I feel like this may fall into the communication bucket. Yep. I feel like her and her boyfriend, yeah, that there are things that they're not communicating well with each other about and as far as the future and what needs to happen and where their heart's at and all that stuff, And I think it's a Morgan. This is what we call the rebound. What

happened to you? He came back two weeks after breaking up and wanted to start from the beginning. That's not uncommon. That's that's called a rebound. You know, you you date for a year and then you go, you know what, I think we should see other people, and then you go for two weeks and you go, I don't think there's anybody else out there. I'ma I'm gonna go back to what was comfortable and what I what I really loved, and I'm gonna go back. And so two weeks comes back.

That's normal. But the trend is that's gonna happen again. As soon as you guys get comfortable again, he's gonna leave again. That's just that's what's gonna happen. He says, he wants to start from the beginning and go slow this time, as if this would be a different scenario,

and it's not. No, it's changed. I would be interested to know what did they do the first time that was fast because it said they were they dated, they were together for a year, and then dated a year after that year, because it says, well, wait, they were together, we were dating for almost a year. But we've been seeing each other for over for about two years. That's pretty slow. If you're so, let me let me just tell you, because again I'm gonna I'm gonna stress test

this a little bit. Leslie and I my wife of seventeen years, we met each other and we're in a circle of friends and we weren't really attracted to each other. We weren't, it was it just wasn't like that. But we both love to play sports, basketball, volleyball, so we would go and just like play and all of a

sudden we had a friendship. And that was like nine months to a year before there was like a night, a night where we both realized like whoa, this this is like who I want to hang out with the rest of my life, and that the veil was dropped I was like, WHOA, I saw her in a different light after that time, though probably maybe six eight months into that, we I mean you could say we broke up or we were on a break or however you're gonna phrase it, right, But that lasted for probably a

couple of weeks. Yeah, and then but we did that in a different way. And that's why I'm wondering, like, what what is the Yeah, it's Morgan. This rebound thing could totally work. He could come back and you could get married. Absolutely, like Bernie's saying, I would suggest to you, and I think I think Bernie would to, not knowing your full story, that go with the part of you that's conflicted instead of the part the voice you said, there's a voice in my head saying keep trying with him,

but there's another side of me that's conflicted. I would go. I would lean on the conflicted side and tell him, hey, just to avoid the rebound, right, to avoid the problem of the of just a rebound. It's not you, it's the rebound that's bringing him back, go with that side and go, hey, I actually feel the same way. I love you, I feel like we have a connection. But we did break up and to avoid us just falling into a rebound that has nothing to do with each other.

I think we should go for a month and then reevaluate, go to coffee in a month, And if he's the right one and if you truly loves you, he's gonna be like, babe, whatever it takes. You want to go a month, you want to go a year. I love you, I want you. I'm gonna be here for you. I'll wait. Okay, great, but then hold him to that month. You might want to do two months just to make to be sure. But if he's the right one and he truly cares

about you, then he's gonna easily wait. But if he's conflicted himself and he's like, I don't know, I mean, I might find someone else in a month. Bye. Right. It's funny that you say that, because that is exactly what Leslie and I did before we got back together.

There was this period of time where you have to let the emotions similar settled down a little bit, because if you just have this emotional response of like, oh, I don't want to be a lot, I gotta be with you, instead of like, man, we took time apart and we didn't communicate at all. I happened to be on the road, which was kind of like helpful to be away, but we didn't talk, and really we just prayed and prayed and prayed, like, God, is is this

the one? Because we don't want to do this whole thing again, and we got past the point of man I miss her. This is an emotional response of like, man, I really am overwhelmingly in love with this woman, and I'll wait as long as I need to until it's reciprocated, and then that's what happens. So I think if you have these thoughts conflicting thoughts again, I'm gonna go back to communication. I think Granger's right. I think you give that space and just see kind of where he's at

and see where you're at process everything. But after that, regardless, I think you got to come back together and communicate, because otherwise she's gonna be filling in that narrative with assumptions instead of talking with him and hearing exactly where his heart's at and on as many things as you feel like I don't know where he's at with this, write it down so that when you guys get back together, you can talk and really kind of establish Okay, here's

our baseline, and from my perspective, this isn't this isn't it. No, there's not enough of these answers that are line up with mine and and so I'm gonna move on and vice versa for him. So so good, Morgan. I think you have a question. You have a lot to think about. It's a great question, and yeah, we wish the best. We take a break and be right back, all right. If you have a question for me, email Grangersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. We'll get answered on this podcast.

I ask one thing, just don't make it too long. It's really hard to read a multiple page email. I sit here on my iPhone and read these and about about the size of the screen of the iPhone. Is that that's good? That's a good length, hopefully shorter if you send me a novel, although it might be really well written in an incredible story, it's almost impossible for me to sit here and read a novel. So if you can just try to make it short, so can

I ask a question. Everybody out there is wondering, sure, when are we going to live? Call in questions? I think it'd be great. Man. I've got something. I have a piece of equipment here that I could actually do that with. Now, okay, so we'll set it up. That would be great. Actually, this next next question that look has a phone number at the bottom, So this question comes from Grant and the subject line is mother in law and kids. Hey God, your my name is Grant.

I'm in my mid twenties. I live in West Michigan, Greater grand Rapid AIA shout out to Michigan. I started listening to your podcast a couple of months ago, and it's really changed how I process decisions. I've been a lifelong follower believer of Christ, but listening to you and your guest work through other people's question since has shown me a way to critically evaluate situations and apply Christ's teachings to them. Thank you. My wife and I have a son that is nearly two years old and we're

trying for another. I was raised as a Christian, and my wife came to Christ in high school and has since become a God fearing woman. Along with myself, we have plans to raise our children in a Christian home. However, my mother in law was raised Catholic, but she does not participate in any kind of religion. Currently, I think she believes they're a god, there is a God, but does not actively pursue a christ sinnered life. She is also gay and quite expressive about that part of her.

My wife and I have discussed that we need to explain to our children that we are to hate the sin but not the sinner at an early age, but I'm worried that that may not be enough. My concern is that my mother in law may impress some of her unbiblical beliefs onto them and or confuse them. Phil it's important that she is a part of their life.

I believe grandparents can be very influential to children, as they were from me, but my dad passed away several years ago, leaving my mother and mother in law, who are opposites in many ways, to be that influence. Wise, counsel I could turn to does not have the experience like this, which makes it very hard to get advice based on experience. Do you or Bernie have any ideas

on how to approach this proactively other than our current plan. Also, when our kids do have questions about faith, regarding the origin of the questions, how do we encourage them to turn to us the Church or the Bible for answers rather than other bad influences. Thank you so much, Grant Man, I have some answers for you, Grant and Bernie and not could be some wise counsel or I don't know wise, E don't know if that's quite the word. We could be counsel for you. Grant and I too, like your

other friends, have not personally experienced this. But that's okay because we could fall on the Bible and that could be our experience all wrapped into one. There's so many things in your email. There's a lot, and so let's kind of just start chopping away like it's a big tree and we've got a sharp axe, and we'll just go slowly into all of this. First of all, you don't congratulations. You're rocking life. You're in your mid twenties, you're trying for a second baby. That's awesome. You've got

a great wife. It sounds like I want to start with this. I want to start with this. You're in protection mode already as a young dad, and that's understandable. You are in your mid twenties. You're new to this dad thing. Not that I'm any farther down the road at all. You know, I'm forty two, so I don't want to speak like that, but I do want to

say the protection mode that you're in as natural. You're just wanting to protect them from the world from the world, but you'll learn through time that it's better to prepare them for the world instead of constantly protect them from it. Prepare instead of protect. And you could do that in several ways, but but mainly right there in your house, you prepare them. I know Bernie does the same thing.

We can't. We can't just put up shields and protect our children from anything they might see or be influenced by. We need to be the main influence coming into them in their house. That's our job, in a preparation way, so that they can go out and go. I see this. I expected to see this because Dad told me I would expect to see this. Stop me, Bernie, if I'm getting too far without you have no thoughts, great man,

keep going, and I want to. I want to dive into something that I read right in here at the top here you said I want to. I have been a lifelong father believer of Christ, and you've taught me how to critically evaluate My wife and I have a son nearly two years old, trying for another we have play here. It is we have always had plans to raise our children in a Christian home, and you want to make sure that this is a christ centered home. And what I don't like about what you said is

I don't like hate the sin, not the sinner. I don't think that that's something you need to explain to your children. I understand the concept. I understand what you're saying. But we're all sinners. Yeah, and kids, we're all that's a higher level concept for you know, I don't know how those kids are, but it's a ways until he has to. You know, grands sitting here, got my cup, man, I got my cup right here for you, wretched sinner coffee cup because that's me, and that's Bernie and that's you,

and guess what, that's also your kids. Amber and I look at Maverick and it's a it's a it's a funny joke that we say, but it's true when we say, oh, you little wretched hearted sund because that's how we're born. We're born into this world as rebellious sinners. Do we need it? Do we need to prove that. Have you ever seen a two year old? They will lie, steal, cheat, They would kill you if they weren't so small, and you would probably kill them if they weren't so cute.

That's the way it is. Man. You hold a little two year old in your arms, and when he wants something, when he wants that piece of candy and you take it away from him, he looks at you like he would kill you if he was one hundred pounds heavier. Yeah, he would shake you. There's nothing about shaking adults. If he had the muscles to do it. Yes, you They grab you at your eyes and your nose with their

little fingernails and they squeeze. And so from the very beginning, when we pop out of the womb, we are not innocent. We are guilty, guilty upon birth right. And so that's that's something that we we could start at an early age. Breathing into the children is through discipline, showing them that we are inherently sinners. Instead of looking at oh, mother in law. Mother in law is gay and we don't want to be like that. It's more like, look at yourself,

look at who we are. We're all broken. We all have our vices, and we all have things that we shouldn't be doing, and so we can't we can't look at this as a protection like, oh, don't don't look at mother in law. Don't don't look at her, she's gay. We got it. We have to protect. We have to protect because this is you know, we're supposed to hat the sin and we want to be a God centered life. Hey, Jesus went to the sinners. He didn't come to Earth to to make laws for us to follow. He came

to save sinners because we already broke the law. It was too late, right now, that's a good point. A lot of people think that everything that Jesus talks about in the New Testament, all the red letters, this is Jesus just a good teacher on like and he's our example. That's how we need to live. And it's like, no, that was not the main point of why he came and what he said. You got to go back and

read it. So like grant, here's here's here's my two cents, man, And again, I'm a parent to try and figure this out in a world that is just like falling apart around us, depraved as it has ever been. So I'm with you, man, and what I think is that this can apply to any parent, regardless of what you believe. Okay, what your belief system, what your worldview is, this still can apply to you. But I'm going to speak to

Grant from a Bible believing disciple of Jesus to another. Okay, the things that not just your mother in law, but anyone that they come in contact with, they're going to have to learn how to discern is this holy? Is this godly? Is it not? How do I make decisions based on what I'm seeing? You have the privilege and the responsibility to guide them, not to yourself and not like, hey look what dad does, because you're going to fail

them just like everybody else. But hey, son, man, I am broken and busted just like everybody else, including you. But what we believe is that there's this book, these holy scriptures that are truth. These are true, and we are going to wrestle with them and stress test them and open them up and they're always going to come back. And I can't wait to walk through all these different

situations in your life. And so, like Granger said, you're preparing them for the journey so that when they get in these situations, they have in their mind these words, these true words, these tested and faithful words, that they can then discern what they're seeing and then make decisions based on that. In nowhere in the scripture, I believe, are you going to find a place that says we just need to isolate and only be here and just protect, protect, protect, protect.

That's not really the mission of the Gospel. That's not really with the intent of the Bible. I think if you think about sin that Granger is talking about in all of us as a disease, yeah, then we're born with it. Yeah, We're born like this. We're born with this disease. So let's say that your son has a disease like how much and it starts to flare up. When it does and you see him in that pain, you're going to just like go even closer to him

and be like, man, I think this is what you're saying. Man, I hate this cancer. I can't believe. Oh son, my heart breaks for you, Like I wish that I could take this on for you. I wish I could bear it for you, But I am here with you. This is a great way to think about Jesus and his perspective of you, of your son, of your mother in law, of all of us. If we are his people, we are his son, his daughter. He doesn't see our sin and separate us. He sees it and he comes even

more so to us. So I don't know what that's helpful, but I love it. I hope that you take what Grange's saying and that I'm emphasizing to you have to be the one that is initiating the conversations, initiating the dialogue so when they get in situations and they see things they don't understand. Hey, Dad, I saw this today, and you're like, oh yeah, hey, remember when we talked about this is kind of that thing. And you keep that conversation going. That is huge. You know what the

problem is with your mother in law? I wish you're around the campfire right now. I could ask you straight up, you know what the problem is with your mother in law? No that the answer is not she's gay. The answer is she's not a believer. That's it. She's a sinner, and so are you, and so is your kids, and so am I. That's not a problem. That's how we're born. But the only way we could eradicate that problem is

through Christ. He does it for us. That's why he came to the earth, That's why we pursue a relationship with him. The problem with your mother in law is she's not following Christ. That's it. So don't look at anything else. You shouldn't be surprised by anything else that she, or you or anyone does, because did you lie today or maybe not today? Did you lie this week? A white lie? Have you ever stolen anything in your life?

Have you ever looked at another woman with lust? Have you ever said the Lord's name in vain in any way? Including O MG? The answer to all those questions is yes, a sinner to and you were born with it, just like your mother in law. So we don't look at her in that way, at her sin. We look at her as without Christ. That's the only thing that matters to you. That's the only thing that should matter to

your kids is she's without Christ. And so that's what you pour into your kids, is that we radically pursue Jesus. We pursue Him with all our heart, and we admit our sins. We admit that we are beyond help. We cannot be helped, and so when we radically pursue him, he takes care of everything for us. That's it. I hope that this helps. I know that you there was a long question you asked, and it was it was very loaded. But I hope that helps. I hope that helps. Yeah,

and Grant email back in Man. I was asking Granger earlier, like some of these questions that we answer, like we'd love to kind of follow these storylines of like you know, Grant, you know a couple of years from now, like what happened with your relationship with your mother in law? Is kids grew up? And like, yeah, we'd love to hear. So, yeah, thank you buddy, thanks for the question. Let's see, here's a question, subject line spiritual advice. Hey, my name is Weston.

I'm from Forest, Virginia. I need some advice on how to be a better Christian. Here we go. I was baptized September fifth, and it was amazing, but I always feel like I disappoint the Lord. I try to be a good Christian. I normally pray every day and I try to keep up with my church's live stream. It's hard to go to church with a two week year old and a two year old. Would you have any kind of advice on why I'm feeling like I could never be good enough to enter heaven? Oh, that's an

easy question. Goodness, You're not good enough? Yes, and you never will be. Why is this our culture, especially the Christian culture, we have to do the stuff like worrying about doing all the stuff. Guys like, you're not good enough? Man, you you will never be good enough. You cannot do good enough, you cannot pray enough, you cannot see enough church live streams to go to heaven. You will fall short every time this is this is you're talking about religion.

And I see that that word pop up on my podcast all the time on these questions religion, religion, religion a race. If you're listening to this podcast, if you're writing in erase that word from your vocabulary. Because religion is man made. Let's all say that together, if you're listening,

religion is man made, right. It's the pursuit of God from man to try to get into heaven, to try to get approval from God, to try to do enough things on a checklist on Santa Claus good and good and naughty list that you can finally go to the North Pole and get a toy that is totally man made. You cannot be good enough to enter heaven. Every other religion besides Christianity says that this is what you do.

Every other religion. I'm talking about Mormons, I'm talking about Muslims, I'm talking about Jews, any other branches of the Abrahamic religions. I'm talking about Buddhism and hindu When it's not totally God, but it's a nirvana, it's what can man do to get there, to get to either peace or heaven or paradise or euphoria, or what can man do to get there? And Christianity is christ He that's what it is. Or he goes, come to me, Come to me, and I

will bring you. I will clean up your life around you. You go to him with your dirty room and he cleans up your dirty room and makes it clean. Go to him, pursue him a relationship, a personal relationationship with him. That's what you do. Do you think that we're just like really dumb human arrogant beings, And it's like we can't because the law was established to make us conscious of sin, to like show us, hey, here's this law. Here's these things you're going to do to live to

be holy? Right, Oh wait, we can't do those things. No human being except Jesus that's lived on the surf has ever done it. We can't do It's impossible. That's why the law's established. We can do it. But when Jesus came and he was like, hey, I've come to put into all this like you are clean in me. You don't have like this this law that you're trying to keep to restore your relationship with God. You don't have to do that. I'm the conduit. Trust in me,

and I will take care of it. But we're like, nah, we got to keep doing all the stuff right, Like, okay, we believe in the Jesus, but still we got to It's like the law these days that has been in all these other religions in within Christianity is still, well did you have your devotional man? Well? Did you go to church? Well? Did you tithe? Well? Did you do

these things? Now? I'm not saying that there is an outpouring of good fruit and holiness and righteousness that will come out just go naturally, but for the love, like, can we stop with this works based can I say works based Christianity, because I think that's kind of other religions say that that Christianity is like no Parker calls

it a plus religion. And members of the LEDs Church and Islam and their man their fingers are getting so tired right now because they're burning me up an email right now, just about to burn me to the ground. And Hey, this is not about this is not about singling out that. This is about defending, defending the Christian faith and and and separating it from the others. And so if you're mad at me, if you're Mormon and you're mad at me, it wouldn't be the first time

that I've gotten your emails. And I want to tell you, truly, truly, truly, I love you, I absolutely love you. And I want the truth. I want the truth to hurt, and I want it to I want it to burn a little bit. And that's why I say it, because because I say it out of love. If I was driving down a road that I just saw that the bridge was out, and I'm driving down the road and you're coming at me in a car and I roll down my window and I say, hey, the bridge is out ahead the

bridge is out and you say get out of here. Man, you don't know what you're talking about. It would be love for me to say stop, the bridge is out. That would be love. It would be hate for me to go do what you want to keep on going, Bro, you find out on your own. So that's so that that I just want you guys to know my heart

that that's that's where it's coming from. And I don't want to make people mad, but people are right now they're typing James two on some email to me, And I want to tell you when when James says that that faith without works is dead, he's talking about in that whole chapter that works are a result. You should see good fruits. Like Bernie said, good works should come. They will come. If it was a real faith, if it was a real relationship you have with Jesus, then

the outcropping of that. How do you know if it's real because you'll see good works, You'll see an image of Jesus coming out through that person and what they do in their daily lives. They're gonna hate their sin. That's a different. That's another thing is when you have a true relationship with Jesus, you start hating your own sin and you want to eradicate it, and you still

do it and you still stumble. But now when you do stumble, you go, oh, I hate that and I have to repent for it because I feel terrible that I told that lie, or that I stole that song on napster, or you hate it, then you want to eradicate it. But that's an outcropping of your faith. It's it's not the beginning of your faith. It's not the works that you do that start the ball rolling, it's

the faith that starts the works rolling. Yeah. And like he's saying that he's feeling this weight of guilt, right, that is not from God at all. Yeah, that's a lie.

And so that's where these you know, the works associated with faith, that's where it's got backwards because you wouldn't be feeling if you had it the way you're talking about, where this is an outpouring, outcropping of that you your trust and dependency on Jesus being the inner session is the focus, and you're not going to feel the guilt over and over because every time he comes in and says, hey,

I got you, this is why I came. Hey, focus on me, just focus on me, just trust in me, and so that that guilt piece, I think that there's you know, is there one of the seas that this falls in. I'm kind of here in communion? Yeah, absolutely, communion. Yeah, so lack of communion with God. And the scripture is like, and so let me let me look at something real quick some some forty hang on a second because this is song or some sorry literally like on the fly,

I have to go day. You'll hear this with David all the time. So why while Granger's looking that up and he's fine, here, okay David and Psalm forty two. Listen to what David says, why are you cast down? Oh my soul? Why are you in turmoil within me? He's talking to himself like why am I so messed up? Why do I have this anxiety? Why I just churning inside me? And then look what he says right off that hope in God, for I shall praise again, praise him, my salvation and my God. He goes back always to

that praise him. And so that's that's that's something for you to remember there, Weston, is is when your when your soul is downcast and you're in turmoil. Just go God, I praise you. Why am I listening to myself? Why am I conflicting my own brain and myself and thinking that I have to work my way to you? And God, I can't take me. Take my soul. Breathe into me, pull your spirit into me. I praise you. You created me, You gave me a purpose. Let me know that purpose.

Don't be quiet. Speak to me God. I mean I'm talking on your knees in your bedroom right. Your elbows are on your bed, and you're just you're just crying out that you can't do it. Pour into me, and then you wait on him and watch him fulfill this to you, Watch him give this to you. Watch this peace well up inside of you where you no longer feel like you have to pray a certain amount of times in the day. You just do because you want to,

not because you have to. Yeah. I think, like anything, the more that you probably study the scripture and engage your mind, you're going to see your heart will follow and you're gonna be like, oh my gosh, I had

no idea that this is what the scripture meant. And then all of a sudden, this desire that Grangeer's talking about as you're sitting kind of in this solitude and stillness and you're you're thinking through the Verse that you have read for the last two or three weeks and studied and now and it's like God just starts to put these things together. And then you can recall that when you're in a conversation with your coworker and you're being used, you're a vessel. You are not doing anything.

Stop trying to do stuff and be a vessel. Okay, yeah, I'm saying this to myself too, guys, right as we need these reminders to every day me. And so the last two questions, you know, we could kind of say the same thing that from the last two questions. You have to remember me speaking into this microphone on this podcast right now. I am my wretched sinner. I'm a sinner, so I don't I don't worry about hate the sin, love the sinner. I don't worry about that kind of thing.

All I think of is my own sin, and it's all in me. And it's like Bernie said, it's a cancer and I want to get it out. I'm not gonna worry about someone else's all with someone else. All I'm gonna worry about is loving them and showing them Christ, showing them their Savior. That's all I'm gonna worry about with I'm not gonna worry about other people's sin. But when it comes to me Weston, I just give it all up and I go. I can't. I can't pray enough, I can't watch enough live streams, I can't do I

can't do anything that's good enough for you. Thank God, Thank God I don't have to because I have Jesus. Yeah, all right, guys, we're at a time bro Amen, thanks for having me. We got we got rough today. Man. I feel like it up on the last two of these things. I gotta go take a shower down. Thanks for joining me on the Granger Smith Podcast. I appreciate all of you guys. You could help me out by

rating this podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube, subscribe to this channel, hit that little like button and notification spell so that you never miss anytime I upload a video. If you have a question for me that you would like me to answer, email Graingersmith Podcast at gmail dot com. Yi