¶ Overcoming Trauma and Shame
Hello , hello , welcome back to God's Diamonds in the Rough . We are so glad to be back with you one more time . We hope all is well with you , amen . We hope that today has been a good day for you . Amen to all our diamonds . We are so excited to be before you . Michael couldn't be here today . Y'all know what he had to do .
He got to work , got to take care of the family , amen . So y'all know , usually when I'm by myself , I always have somebody else with me , even outside of Jesus , amen . So today we have a guest and her name is Catherine , as mine is spelled the same way Hallelujah . Her name is Catherine Cooper , amen .
And I'm going to tell you something that's ironic is that her husband's name is Michael too . Now wait , there's something that's all God . So , Ms Catherine , would you say hello to our audience .
Hello , good afternoon . Praise God , what a blessing it is to be on your show .
We are so glad to have you my dear .
Yes , all right , right . Yes , that is ironic that both of our names is katherine and both of our husbands names is michael , so we've been kind of excited about meeting each other , oh yeah yeah , yep , yeah .
So , um , diamonds , everybody that's listening , y'all know we've got to do . We got to pray first before we get into this conversation . So , ms Catherine , would you pray us into the conversation on today ?
Yes .
All right .
Cool . Heavenly Father , we just thank you , lord , god , for bringing us here tonight , god , and for with all the obstacles that we've had trying to get here .
But , father , we thank you , o God , that you are a God that will continually be with us and continually lead us and guide us , o God , and no matter what obstacles come our way , lord , god , if we just continue to trust and believe in you , god , that you will lead us and you will guide us .
And , father , we ask you that you take over this conversation tonight , god , and that you have us say what we need to say . And when we finish saying what we have to say , god , that you bring it into it . And , father , we just thank you that you continue to bless Catherine and Michael with their continual podcast .
God , let it continue to minister and open up hearts and continue to bless God . And in the name of Jesus , father , we ask it . So , in your name , amen , Amen , amen .
Thank you so much for doing that . Amen , I typically do that , and the Lord just said have her to do it . So there you go , we're just going to roll with it . So I always we do it . So there you go , we're just going to roll with this . So , uh , I always .
We always refer to our listeners , to diamonds , because we want , um , we want us to see each other see ourselves the way that god sees us , um , and in the sight of god we are beautiful we are beautiful people , we are his sons and his daughters , and we ought to carry ourselves that way , amen .
So , miss kath , would you tell , yeah , our diamonds who you are .
Tell us a little bit about yourself well , I am , um , katherine cooper and I am the author of time out for hiding . I am , um uh , pastor's wife .
We were blessed with six children and we have 23 grandchildren and now we have seven or eight great-grandchildren and we have really been—I've been blessed with continually working within our ministry and I have volunteered working with the Hubbard House , ministering to women .
I have volunteered working with Finding Our Voices , getting Back Our Voices , which was a women's ministry that was in Georgia . We worked with them , did weekend retreats .
We're going to talk more about your book here in a minute . But the topic of conversation today is why are we hiding ?
And this concept and this topic is brought about by trauma , and you know , if you have lived any number of years and matured at all , we all endured something , we've all had to deal with something , and most of the time , that thing that we've had to deal with is shameful .
And so , because it's shameful and because we're embarrassed and whatever have you , whatever emotions are attached to it , we tend to hide . So , ms Catherine , would you agree with what I just said as far as this hiding , the hiding place , being attached to trauma ?
Yes , ma'am , I totally agree with that .
Okay , and so how is it that you are able to answer this question ? Why are you capable and able of answering this question of why are we hiding ? Why are we hiding ?
Well , I have to think for myself . I spent many years hiding because of fear and because of shame . Yes , fear , definitely number one After the trauma of didn't want anyone to find out . You know what I had been through . I lived in a household where I was molested as a child and believing that it was my fault and it had to be something wrong with me .
And so I began to hide , and it was four of us girls and we were hidden even from each other , and we didn't find out until years and years and years later that all of us had been had gone through the same trauma from the same person under the same roof , and we didn't know it .
And because we were hiding and trying not to let anybody know , you know what we had been through . And so that fear and that shame was transferred over to us and so we walked around with that and it went all the way through our adult years , even after being married .
I was married to my husband and he never knew what I had went through until the Lord was deciding to bring me out of my hiding place .
And so , once the Lord decides to bring me out of that place , you have to come face to face with you and your trauma , and so I thank God for that , because then it begins to you begin to find out what real freedom is and you begin to find out what real love is . And so you can't have those things .
If you're carrying that baggage of fear , loneliness , shame , you walk around in depression . I was a very moving person . I could be happy one moment . The next moment I was sad .
I didn't know why , you know , because I carried those things around with me , but you know it started in my childhood , and even when I went to school , I was afraid of being real , you know , with my classmates , because I didn't want them to know who I was .
So , and then , in the midst of that hiding , midst of that uh hiding um , you even lose yourself , you know . You lose who you really are . And so I had to go back and find out , as the Lord was delivering me , who I was . My self-confidence had to be re-established in me and , um , self-confidence , um , self all these places had to be rebuilt in me .
And so it was a long , long journey , right , and so , but we go through those things when we go through trauma in our lives , and so , but you know , my biggest thing was fear and hopelessness and rejection , and learning how to trust and hopelessness and and rejection , and learning how to trust .
You know , like we say , I'll trust God , but I didn't know how to trust people , and so it was hard for me to trust God too , because a God I can't see , and I couldn't trust man or woman that I could see , and so I had to learn . I had to learn that also .
So , um , like I said , it was a long journey , but I thank God because , you know , he's our alpha , he's our omega , and so once he starts a journey with us , he does not leave us , um , he doesn't stop in the middle .
He doesn't stop in the middle , he goes with us all the way , and as long as it takes you to accept what has happened and realize that God has a bigger plan for your life and that he has a purpose , even though we may not see the purpose .
But I thank God because it made me a better person , because I've seen a lot of people that went through similar things that I went through , or went through worse things that I went through , and I see how it has changed their personalities .
And I'll be like , oh Lord , I thank God I didn't turn out like that , but I thank God that I learned what I needed to learn and I learned how to love , and I learned how to love and I learned how to forgive and I learned how to look past the pain and see the need of people .
And so that's my desire is to help people overcome that pain and overcome the places where people have let them down and realize that you know , we are human and we make mistakes , but we have to learn how to forgive and we have to learn how to trust , and so those were the two biggest things that I had to learn was to love , to forgive and to trust .
That is so powerful because many times when we have trauma and things have happened in our life , that's the first thing that we do , is we hide and Diamonds .
What we want you to understand and y'all we've heard it here before , if you've been here any length of time is that the things that you've been through , things that you have overcome , the things that you will overcome it has everything to do with who you are and if you're trusting God 100% , you know that his plan and his way is not of harm and it's not
of evil , but it's that you will prosper . So the process is process . Journey is your journey . Don't be ashamed of what you've been through . Hallelujah , we always it seems that it's always easier for us to hide than it is for us to confront .
You know what I'm saying it's always easier to hide than it is to confront , to face the thing that has come against us . And that's what the enemy wants us to do . You know , he wants us to hide , he wants us to distrust God , he wants us to doubt the goodness of God , because if he can do that then he has foothold .
And so , coming out of hiding , and you shared a little bit , but , like emotionally , can you kind of process or kind of go a little bit further with those tears ?
Because a lot of I ask that because people it seems that people are afraid to shed a tear , they are afraid to cry , they're afraid to really face the problem or face the insecurity , face the depression , face the anxiety . Can you speak to the tears and what really the tears are about ? Because I'm sure with your story you shed a lot .
Yes , my first set of tears that I can remember , because I had gotten to the place where , in my hiding , was that I had just totally blocked it out and I just wouldn't , I wouldn't acknowledge anything about it . It was like I put it in the back and I was like , okay , I'm not even going to , um , I'm not going to think about it , I'm just .
You know , that was just something that happened to me and , and you know , I'm no longer dealing with that and I did that at an early age and so , um , I just tried , I tried my best to forget that it ever happened .
¶ Healing Through Emotional Release and Love
And , um , and I remember um reading Joyce Meyer's book , uh , beautiful Ashes .
And I remember , um TD Jake's book , um , woman Died At Loose , and I read those books but I was so hidden until it didn't faze me that they were talking about me and I was just reading them like they were books , and I was like , okay , you know , and even reading in the bible where david , when he was , was fearful of his life and he went and hid in
the cave , and I was like , but it didn't penetrate to me that that was me . And so we went to the woman that lose conference and with two takes and he showed the movie woman that lose . And showed the movie , the woman died loose and he actually showed the little girl being molested . And I was sitting there and I was like , oh no , he did not do this .
And I was like , oh my God . And I was sitting there and the thing about it was because my husband was a minister at the church and you know , we had been there for years and years and years and nobody knew about what I had been through .
And I was like , oh no , I'm not going to break down , I am not All these women in here , nobody knows anything about me . And you know , my husband was one of the ministers in the church . If they find out what I've been through , they're not going to like me , they're not going to want to have anything to do with me Because , again , it was my fault .
And so I was like , oh no , I am not going to break down . And I heard women in there hollering and screaming and crying . I was like , oh no , I'm holding on to this chair with everything I have . And I'm like , no , I am not going to break down , I am not .
And one of the sisters , she touched me and she touched me , I broke down and I just began to cry and it was like it took me back to the day , to that day , and I cried and she just took me in her arms and she wrapped her arms around me and I became that little girl and I cried and I cried and I was like , oh my God , but those tears were a
cleansing . Those tears were a relief that was letting all of that that I was holding , that I was hiding , that I was not letting anything in , not letting anything in . So when you , when you get to that place where you can't let anything in , you got to let things out so that you can get , you can let God's love in .
And so I was holding all of that stuff and I was like , oh my God , and I just cried and cried , and cried . I don't know how long I cried , I cried , but then after I got finished crying , then I got mad . I was like God , you brought me all the way here to embarrass me .
I was like , oh my God , no , but I thank God because I have been in a ministry of love and they just , you know of love and they just , you know , just loved me regardless .
You know and I didn't I knew , cause the enemy paints this picture in your mind that , oh yeah , when people find out what you did , when people find out what happened to you , they're not going to like you , they're going to be talking about you .
¶ Shine Together
He paints all of this negative stuff in your mind and so , if you don't know any better , you believe it . And so you believe that nobody's going to like you , you believe that nobody's going to want to be around you . You even believe that you're not going to like yourself , and so , but he doesn't tell you that , finally , you're going to be free .
He doesn't tell you that , finally , you're going to be able to just like yourself . He doesn't tell you any of that . He doesn't tell you that you're going to love me and I'm going to get to meet Kathy for the first time , and so he doesn't tell you those things . He tells you all the bad things . He tells you all the negative things .
He tells you all the negative things . He tells you all the things that is to keep you in that prison , to keep you locked up so that you cannot come out and be free . And so when afterward , it was like I felt so clean and I felt so light that burden is off of me . And the Lord said bring your burdens to him and lay them there .
He said I'll carry them . But I didn't know that . And so when I experienced that I was like , oh my God . But then I got mad . I got mad . I was like Lord , what is this ? But I just thank God , because when I got back , my pastor was like you got a testimony . I was like no , I don't . And he's like yes , you do . And I was like no , I don't .
And he's like , yes , you do . And I was like no , I don't me . I was like no , I don't , but . And then I was like I've always been that Lord , not my will , but your will be done . And so I was like Lord , okay , god , if you want me to get up and get this testimony , I will .
And when I did , just to see people crying out and to see people coming to the altar , because I just thought it was me and see , that's when an enemy doesn't tell us that there's so many people that are bound , that there's so many people that are walking around hurting , that there's so many people that are walking around wounded , that's waiting for someone to
say you can be free , right , come on out , you can live , you can have this freedom , you can have this joy , you can have this peace . They're waiting for somebody to come and say come and get it . It's free , Come and get it . God already died for you to have it . It's free , come on , god already died so he can have it .
And so to see these people at this altar and I was like , oh my God , crying out because they wanted to be free , and I was like , oh my God . And he said this is what I want you to do . I want you to set my people free . That's right . And I was like , so I had to go through that . That's what I'm telling God .
I had to go through that , that's what I'm telling God . I had to go through that so that I could get this . And now it's like Lord , if one person life changes , then it was worth it and it just for me .
It just it just brings home what you just said . It just brings home the fact that a whole lot of what we've done or been through it ain't necessarily for us . And I just hear God saying that you know what you experienced as a child . Yeah , it was hard and it was painful , but it was for now .
It was for then , when you were able to stand at that altar and tell that story and you were able , he was able to use you to be able to stand at that altar and tell that story and you were able , he was able to use you to be able to free his people .
Oh man , girl , that's powerful , oh lord . But you gotta get free , you gotta let me heal you so that you can heal others . When people are walking around saying they're healed but they're still mad about it , then you can't heal anybody .
But when you've got freedom about what you've been through and you've got the love of God , that God loves me , that God loves me , he is so proud of you .
When you make that stand and say , hey , I'm free , I belong to God and he has set me free and he loves me , regardless of what I've been through or where I've been or what I've done or what somebody's done to me and I have forgiven them . He is so proud and that's what he's .
That's what God is all about and he wants us to let people know let that go , because I got so much more for you . Are you holding on to that ? Oh , I got so much more for you . Just let it go . I got you . Amen , I love it . I love it . Let the love flow .
So I know this is all in your book , so can you tell people where they can get your book and just give us a little you know , whatever you desire to give about your book or tell about your book .
Well , my book is actually about me coming out , because when the Lord was like , oh , you're going to write a book , and I was like , no , I don't know how to write no book . And he's like , yes , you're going to write a book and the name of it is time out for hiding , because I need you to stop hiding . That's how you're going to set my people free .
It's because I need you to stop hiding and I need you to come out . And I'm in the process now of trying to start a coaching class where it's called Come Out and Live . And so I had to go through the come out of hiding so that now I can come out and live . And so I was like , oh my God .
So he gave me to come out and live at the same time that he gave me his time out for hiding . But I thought come out and live was part two , and actually it is because now he wants me to do the one-on-one coaching with people and teach them how to come out and live , come on out and be free .
But anyway , the book Time Out for Hiding is available at Amazoncom and it's Katherine Cooper , time Out for Hiding . And I am on Facebook , katherine Cooper . But , like I said , if we just come on out and live , come on out and enjoy life , that's what God created us for To enjoy life , hallelujah .
Do you have a website People can go to ?
My website actually is hooked up to my Facebook page .
Okay , all right .
Somehow , when they created it , they created it and it's hooked up to my Facebook page . Okay , all right .
And somehow , when they created , it , they created it and it's hooked up to my Facebook page .
Well , that's awesome , well , yeah .
That was powerful .
I mean , I don't know how else to say what you said , because you know everything that you said tonight is absolutely what we want people to get from this podcast to know that Jesus has given us beauty for ashes , that everything everything that you've been through is not for nothing and that we don't have to be ashamed , we don't have to be embarrassed , we don't
have to be . We don't have to be embarrassed , we don't have to be . Um , we don't . We don't have to compartmentalize . I'm trying to make y'all say it right compartmentalize our life . You know what I mean . To try to kind of you know this is over here and that's over there , and and um , he just wants us to be free at the end of the day .
He wants us to be free in him Um , and unashamed of our story , because it's for some . Somebody needs your story . So , diamonds , let's shine . Let's shine together .
Shine where you are .
Everybody's light don't look the same same , but when you get in the light you're going to shine , and the reality hallelujah . The reality is , it ain't it ain't always necessarily about shining the brightest , because when you're shining with everybody else , you're shining together in one light . So that is the beauty of being one in christ .
Hallelujah amen I am just so grateful for you uh being here hallelujah , so did you have a final thought uh , miss cooper , you have a final thought , anything you want to say to the audience when that that was my um thought .
I was just thinking about the diamonds and how we are just a light to the world and we shine . And I know a lot of times people be looking at me and I was like , why are these people looking at me ? And the lord told me it's because you're shining .
And when she told me diamonds in the rough , and I was like , yes , because those diamonds it takes a lot of heat to make a diamond come out because they're encrusted with all of the dirt and the crust and all of that . And that's what we were . We were encrusted with all of the sin and all of the pain and the anger and the hopelessness and all of that .
And it was the heat of the love of God that broke us out and made us into diamonds and that's the reason why we're shining . And he wants us to just to keep shining . And the more we shine , the more people we're going to draw to us . So we just got to keep shining hallelujah and I love this show thank you so
¶ Unity in Faith
much .
We it's all about jesus , amen and I , just we are . We are . Our goal is to get like-minded people on here with the same message that we have amen doing it in a way they're doing it their way , doing it the way god told them to do it , doing it through their story .
However , god um gives it to them to give to his sons and his daughters , long as we are sounding the same amen with a heart posture that is not about us , but it's all about him . That is what it's all about for us .
Hallelujah yes .
Hallelujah .
Thank you , Lord .
I thank you . I just thank you so much for sticking in there , because we had we were supposed to do this a couple of months ago , I believe , but we was . We was determined to get this done , not solely for ourselves , but for every listener that is here .
So , father , we thank you so much for your grace and your mercy , thank you so much for allowing us , god , to come together one more time , and we thank you , god , for bringing this relationship into fruition . We pray , god , that it will continue to grow as we grow , as we continue to go forth in you .
I pray God , that you would continue to touch Miss Catherine and her husband and her family , everybody that is attached to her , touch her ministry , touch her books and touch her hand , touch her mind , her heart , god , as she goes forth in you . We pray , in the name of Jesus , for every diamond that is here that we would all just shine together .
I pray , god , that every diamond would move in faith and not in fear , in the name of Jesus , that 2 Timothy , verse 1 and 7 , would rest on every heart that is listening . Father , we bless you , we bless your name . We say thank you , god again , for your grace and your mercy . We pray this prayer in the mighty name of Jesus Christ .
We do pray , amen , amen . And amen , Hallelujah Again . I say thank you again for being here and we bless everything that you're doing . Amen for the kingdom .
Amen .
If there's anything that we can do to help you out ? Ms Catherine , please let us know .
Amen Thank you .
Amen . So diamonds , y'all know what it is . Michael always says Remember you are A diamond in the rough . So , diamonds , y'all know what it is . Michael always says remember you are a diamond in the rough , amen amen , amen amen .