Giggling about breakups, blisters, and public meltdowns

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What's up, gigglers? Gary, fix your Wi-Fi. Manifest that shit. We can't be managed. I mean, the day just got away from me. What is up my gravitational giggler? It's a new one. It's a good one. So we did our first second episode. Yeah. And we, if you guys haven't noticed, we're in a new studio and our YouTubes now have full bodies.

And I am just crumbling under the pressure of getting an outfit together for this. Because we're used to having a table in front of us. And also I see so many people do like podcast clips and I'm like, oh. Shoot, they blew their hair out. They put on a good outfit. And then my mom's like, you love outfits, you love clothes. Why do you show up to Giggly Squad and you always look?

A mess. Well, you pretended to work out this morning. I pretended to work out this morning. Also, I'm one week before my period, so my boobs are like huge. Yeah, yeah. Take advantage. What was I just saying? Well, I dressed up like a 90s.

bully yeah but hannah said something so not hannah she was like let's say what our outfits are where where does one even get that t-shirt this is a brand called only new york and then i'm actually wearing these a gold Agoldi. Agolda. Yeah. Jeans. Beryl. Okay. Thank you for leaving the best for last. What the hell are on your feet? I've never seen a Mary Jane Adidas. I didn't even know they made those. Look, I don't do ballet flats unless you can run in them.

And sorry for all you audio listeners. You gotta go to YouTube. That's a diabolical shoe. And you want to know what? When I was with you the other day. Sorry, like Velcro. Sorry, I don't want to tie my shoe like an adult. I actually meant to bring this up to you the other day because I. Put your finger down. I had to run downstairs and I couldn't find my shoes on like Tuesday when we hung out. And so I put yours on. And as I slipped them on, I was like, what the fuck are these? I've never.

there's some people like i can't when i see a traditional shoe i'm like i can't work with this like i need otherworldly shapes No, because like when a heel croc came out, I was like, that's like a joke. I thought they were doing like a April Fool's joke. Like, oh my God, look, we do heels. Not really. It's just for like the shoot. And you were like.

I'm buying them. I have all the gibbets. Look, the Hanukkah girls send me the craziest sneaker heels all the time. And I'm like, thank you, bot. Someone sent me orthopedic heels. Was it you actually? That's just orthopedic heels and cats on my feed. Yeah. You said you have a lot to talk about. Yeah. Real quick, just promo.

Paige and I have been hanging out. No, it's actually not good for the business. It's not good. I have no motivation, but I have to go back on tour. Not have to. It's game time. I just have to get out of vacation mode to. go on tour. I'm going to Idaho on Wednesday. So Idaho, all of our Colorado, LA, San Francisco, Seattle, Nashville, Atlanta, Durham, Charlotte, Indianapolis, Milwaukee, we're going. So I'm about to black out for two months and then I shoot the Hulu special.

February 28th in Toronto. Now, are you going to take a beta blocker? Yeah. I'm about to, I warn you guys, the two weeks before I shoot the special, I'm going to be in psychosis. Like, I'm going to be talking. on the pod, but I'm going to be like so in my head. I've never seen you like nervous for anything except the week before you did your special. You were not yourself at all. No, I had to like apologize to people when I walked in a room. I'm like, hey, I'm going to be weird.

I don't know who I am or what I'm doing. I do think, though, because it's my second special, I know what to expect. And it's going to make me a lot more confident. The Netflix thing, it's like I've never filmed a special. So I just everything that could go wrong. I was like worried about going wrong. repeatedly in my head for every day and anyway it was a dark existence but and now we're back and i'm like why don't we do it again no but i'm like i feel a lot better yeah

And where are you filming it again? Toronto. Oh, right, right, right. Toronto. The Toronto girls are amazing, insane. And you filmed it last time in... Philly. In Philly. Yeah. I love how also you get off on in your comfortable exercise outfit looking at me going, so where do you have to go?

I'm like, wow, I have no plans this week. Maybe I'll wear my pink workout set tomorrow. But don't worry. Giggly squad, you know I'm going to get your ass back on tour. Okay, so are we, was this, we were like going to up our outfits? Or no, we're going to stay ourselves. I only have so much to give to this world. I just feel like when I do Giggly Squad, I can't be in an outfit that I would normally...

socialize in or go out in because that's a persona of me. That's a fake person that you meet on the street. That's a character that I wrote. That I've created. Okay. She has made up motives and plot lines. She's annoying, honestly. Okay, with her fucking ballet flats. She's annoying. Anywho. No, I have a lot for us to talk about.

Well, okay, let's get the gross stuff out. I did something so embarrassing this morning. I was at a nice coffee shop with my husband. It was really quiet, birds chirping. It's like 8.30 a.m. And I decided to get a croissant. Immediately, I felt like I had to fart. Okay. But it was like a little one. Are you in line? No, I'm sitting at a table. Okay. Inside, but- Outdoors. Oh, okay, outdoors. Outdoors. And I feel like I have to fart sometimes.

It's outdoors. It's a free country. And it was like a little one. But you know when it's a little one and somehow it comes out like with a trumpet, like the smaller it is, the like louder it is and like the higher pitch it is. No, I'd actually kill myself. So I'm sitting with my husband and he goes.

Hannah! And I don't react, because look, as a girl, if you don't react, a man will be blamed. So I just sit there. And Des is, this is actually my least favorite part about him. He's one of those people who's like, you farted! He's like a call-out person. He's a snitch. I'm like, whose team are you on? Wait, I didn't see that for him. Because he thinks it's funny. The only time I've ever been like, does, is like one time you were telling a story and he was like...

That's not what happened. Tell it right now. He does that. he no that's exactly this is this is she's performing my biggest pet peeve is i say a story and he goes no that's not what happened and i go oh my god i was adding je ne sais quoi yeah you were adding spice and he's like and he's like

well, if I'm part of the store, I can't be part of your lie. And I go lie. That was a fucking incredible monologue. Sprinkles on it. Like give me a break. So he also, it's, there's a thing with relationships. We're at the point where like, even yesterday we were going to get dinner with you and. He I was like, I want to be early and he's like you only like to be early around page and I'm like, well, I respect her

I can't believe you said that because literally right before we were going to dinner, I was like, well, Hannah's not going to be on time. She's always like 10 minutes late. So Des was like, is Paige going to be late? And I'm like, she's going to be early or like exactly on time.

It was a 30 minute drive and I was like, I'm not risking it. And he literally goes, you act so different with Paige. I was like, sorry, we never go out to dinner. And like, this is a big deal for me. I haven't socialized in New York in three years.

And I've gone out every single night in Miami. I'm like, I'm calling friends I haven't talked to in 10 years. Wait, this actually, literally the other day, I... I was like texting a girlfriend that I knew in college and we've, we've been friends.

since college, but we're not the type of friends where I'm like, what are you doing this weekend? We're the type of friends where like every two months we'll like check in or something, but it's never like deep, deep. It's a story replier. We're casual friends. Then I had another girlfriend who I've been also friends with for 10 years. Haven't seen her in probably like five. But again, like we keep up with each other. Like we'll talk every once in a while, whatever. All three of us hung out.

And every woman has the same experience. all the time like we're just all the same like we all sat down and we were like oh my god like how are you like what's going on and then the first girl goes well I'm so annoyed with my husband okay well you want to hear what I'm dealing with and I was like okay this took four

minutes and 30 seconds and we're back wait can i say no wait it felt no i'm not finished it felt so relieving because There's something when you're in your 30s and you see a friend from your 20s, instinctually, you're like, well, I'm so different. And this is how. Yeah. But also I'm still the same. And you almost feel like you have to impress them a little bit. But when they're like your true friends, it's like.

OK, what's like really going on? And you're like, OK, well, actually. And it felt so nice. We hate socializing. But I realize now when you're socializing with the right people, it's good for your mental health because. their mirror so like it's healthy for you to see how other people see you especially when you see yourself like shit sometimes yes so to see other people be like wait but me too like we're the same is is mentally healthy so and there's like times where you're like

Only I feel this and only I'm going through this. And I can't tell anyone because they're going to think I'm weird or like. whatever and then you say it and they finish your sentence yeah and they're like yeah i dealt with that last week literally yesterday this morning that was like us with the gigglers when you had a panic attack and i was like who had a panic attack this week and they were like one two three me um

so I fart at the coffee shop oh right and I try not to pull it and Des is staring at me like a film staring at me and he goes did you just and I and I start going I start laughing he goes are you oh my god the confidence you even have to do that like I would have literally risked. Women need to take up space. I would have literally risked my.

stomach exploding inside my body this is the thing i'm an avid farter so like i know the ways to get around it i got unlucky where there was no bird chirping in that moment and he was like dead silent i'm just in new york city okay you can fart anywhere in new york city and you are

there's a fucking like building exploding and of course I could fart in New York City we're in Miami and there's like no one everything is peaceful you can do anything on the street of New York City like I'm not kidding I could projectile vomit and no one would know and people would just be like Are you okay? Okay. Thank you.

He looks at me and then he starts looking around. I'm like, stop. And he's just starting to laugh and he goes, those people heard. A hundred percent, Hannah. A hundred percent. This is the reality. This is the public. We're out on this. Like, yeah, they heard. They have ears. I'm like, we have to go now. Yeah, I would assume so. I have a whole sandwich left, but I was like, we have to go. The owner's like walking out. Like, you do have to go. Excuse me, ma'am.

There's too many hot people in Miami. You can't do this. But I look back and the girl has her. Airpods in and I'm like does she has airpods and we're good and he goes no it was the family over there and I'm like a whole family we gotta go there Paul they're trying to have a vacation so we left also not to call Des out again but speaking of you talking to your friends and having this amazing beautiful connection

i have to say what happened i'm at breakfast and this i love that four years of this podcast every story that you've told I'm at dinner. I'm at breakfast. So I'm at this lunch. My life surrounds meals. Okay. So this particular meal, it's at breakfast. And this handsome guy walks by. Yeah. And he looks at me and I'm like, obviously I'm so good looking. And he goes, hey, can you give Paige my number? Stop. And I was like.

I kind of like pause because I'm your gatekeeper. And I was like, wait, oh, you told me that. Yes. I think he DM to me. And I said, well, I just looked at him and I was like, why are you single? Because he's 36, handsome, what happened? And he's like, I'm going through a separation. And I was like, okay. From a wife? Who knows? But the man is bleeding out. He's vulnerable. I said, okay, we'll see what we can do. But then the next day.

does does wakes up like at the crack of dawn comes back to the hotel room at like 10 a.m. and i'm like slowly getting up and he's like I just hung out with that guy for like an hour at the coffee shop. And I was so mean, I go. So my future husband has already. You want to know what? That's what I want from a future husband. I want you to stalk me.

I want you to change your name, infiltrate my life. Be like, I've been obsessed with you for years. If you want it to, you will. If you want it to, you will. So immediately I'm like, this is amazing. I'm about to get like so much tea. I go, so. What happened with the separation? Des goes, what? He's going through a separation. Like, what's happening? He goes, no, we talked about cars. He goes, I'm not asking about his personal life. I go, if a girl.

was going through a separation and she was just washing her hands in the bathroom, I would know about it. If I'm in an elevator with a girl who's going through a separation, I would smell it and be like, fuck that dude. And she'd be like, I know, you know what he did? And I go, tell me what he did. There are girls in my DMs. Who have told me more details. Wait, now my DMs from the girls are like, hey.

I know you said on the pod, don't DM you about your boyfriend problem because you're just going to say break up with him. But listen to this one. But it's the same answer. So anyway, men, they like respect each other's privacy in a way that is... I don't respect. You want to know what? It's in a selfish way. Well, because they never had to in life. They never had to be like, I need help. Yeah. Okay. I've been dying to talk about it since we started.

Since we talked about it on the pod last time, the toxic mom group, I just love it. So this is my problem. I'm so obsessed with it. I can't get myself to read a full cut article because the words are so small. Wait. They're so small. Why do they do that? It's like keeping like, what do I do with my time? Ooh, I'll read Ashley Tisdale's article now and I can't get to it. I can't do it. Did you read it? No.

Okay, so without reading the article, what is the current update? There was this article that I did read that was like, I think like page six or something. Yeah. about um Ashley Tisdale and Vanessa Hutchins and how they used to be really good friends which I completely forgot that they were like always out together and then random but even after yeah

And then I feel like COVID happened and then I like forgot about them. But the article said that when Austin Butler broke up with Vanessa, Ashley stayed better friends with Austin. Because they were all friends and Vanessa felt like she supported him more. So then they stopped talking. Wow. And when I read that, I was just like, you know, what's so crazy is like.

You're in high school, fucked up shit happens to you. You like learn about different people's personalities, what like friendship is like. And you're like, oh, I never have to deal with that again. Then you get to college. You have one year where like you're just like. no I'm switching all my why was I friends with them or like something happens and you're like I'll never deal with that again because I'm not in school like now I'm an adult I'm in the workplace you're gonna say workforce I was

We are in the workforce. We are in the workforce. Then you get to an office and you're like, wait a minute. Dude, office politics? Offices are so scary. Then you're like, okay, whatever. That's like a professional. It's not in my personal life. I don't have to deal with it. Every stage of a woman's life, I feel like there's some type of situation where like you have to.

It's just like something happens with your friends where I actually applaud the men for that because you never hear of that. You never hear of guys being like, he was my best friend all growing up. And then something happened in college and we never spoke again. So I actually like.

admire that about their friendships okay yeah they don't talk to each other they don't know anything about each other it's like those marriages where it's like well they don't sleep in the same bed so obviously they can stay together like they haven't seen each other okay yeah like i'm not judging but it's like when

But men do, even if you look at tennis matches, the women are not friends on tour. After a match where something goes wrong, I'm like, well, I'll never speak to her again. Where men will literally sleep with each other's girlfriends. get in a physical altercation and then be like, it's okay, bro. I'll see you tomorrow. Like, I'll literally, I'll see you tomorrow. I don't know how they do that.

But also I feel like there is like every girl has had one friendship breakup where you're like, that was my canon event. Yeah, because she when a girl doesn't want to be friends with you, it hurts more because. she really loved you for you like she wasn't having sex with you exactly like you weren't like tricking her with your pussy don't like my personality you genuinely know my heart and my soul you know me more than my boyfriend

And you're like, it's actually a no for me. Also, you probably see my vagina as much. Since you went to like non-traditional, like you didn't have a traditional high school experience. Yeah. Did you, have you ever had like a big friendship breakup?

Where like you were friends with that person for a really long time and then one day it was just like. The only friendship breakups I ever had was reality TV. Which honestly. Which is like not real. It's not real but it also is kind of harsh because it was like. your entire friend group one day they're like and you're out yeah like i've never lost like seven people like that before right

I have. We're going to make it actually more depressing. I thought you were going to be like, no, not really. But like since then I've never had, I've definitely had like. growing apart because like someone starts having a family or like someone leaves jobs. Right. I have a question for you that I think people might.

connect to okay everyone has that like friend who might have like partied a little too hard in their 20s yeah and may have like pissed off a lot of people and like was a lot of drama but then we're at the point now in our 30s where a lot of these people have done work on themselves they're sobering up and they're

they're kind of like re-emerging into people's lives. Like, hey, sorry when I was 24 and was in a K-hole. Now I'm 33 and I did ayahuasca and I reflected. Do you let these people back into your lives? Wow. And this is a very general question because I have friends who have used to party really hard and didn't do a lot of healthy things and may have hurt people.

This is a very polarizing statement, I'm going to say, but my mom has like said it since I was little, so I don't really care. And it actually isn't whatever. But she's always said that like people don't change like ever. Like, I don't she was like, I don't care if they went to therapy. I don't care if they did this. I don't care if they did that. They don't change, which I believe. But I also think.

People can grow. People can change. No, like I don't wholeheartedly believe that, but in her defense, 99% of the time. Yeah. whatever you didn't like about them is probably still a little bit there. I did have one friendship breakup. Oh, yeah. How old were you?

Okay. So it was really intense. She was like my best friend and we were on the tennis team together. And then she was having her own kind of issues with the team and ended up leaving the team. And we had kind of like this falling out that was. It was sad, but I also was like, this isn't a healthy relationship anyway anymore. And then fast forward years later, she reached out to me and had done a lot of work on herself.

and was so self-aware of what happened, things that she could have done differently. Immediately, I was like, and I could have done this differently. And we'll never be as close as we were, but I've 100% forgiven her. Yes, I think that's where you have to get. It's like, oh, we both know we both were so apologetic and both were clearly like.

loved each other and expressed like i missed you and i'm so sorry well it's very stressful for your own self to dislike someone yeah like you can't like you really can't hate people i mean obviously i have a list of people i fucking hate

is bad for you active hate like where you're actively like i don't know texting them and fighting is so different than people that you're just like they scare me i don't want to be associated but love and hate are close where like me and this girl were like so close and then it was like for us not to be speaking it was literally a breakup so it's kind of like a guy who like you had a great thing with

but then there was miscommunication and got fucked up. And one day later in life, you're just like, by the way, like I respect you and I love you. And like, it wasn't meant for us, but no hard feelings. Yeah. If a girl came back to me. Like as a friend, I would be more into like possibly. But if a guy did, I would never even respond. But even with girls, I would argue you never be my best friend again.

Correct. I had a friendship breakup when I was in college and I'm not kidding. It took me like four years to get over it. And the final straw was, I remember not even the final straw. It was like when I realized she didn't want to be my friend anymore. Yeah. It was her 21st birthday and I was like, what are we doing? Like, oh my God, 21. And she was like, oh, I don't know yet. And then I saw she was in Atlantic City. She was like, cool. She was in Atlantic City with her family.

And I think that's why when we did a show in Atlantic City, I was so weird. We were in like a car and you randomly go, I'm not going to die in Atlantic City. And I was like, okay. And I couldn't understand why I was having such an aversion to Atlantic City. And then I remembered that story and I was like, oh, yeah, because I've never been to Atlantic City or even thought about going because of that moment in my early 20s. Not getting invited to a party.

Yeah. Where like everyone else is invited is like. But that's what I guess Ashley Tisdale was talking about. Basically. Like that's like she felt like she she would see them at like brunch and stuff. But that now in my 30s. yeah go to brunch get out there girls like have the best time it's hard with the friend group though is sometimes it's one person being like we're not inviting this person yeah and then other people are just kind of like going with it but they're not necessarily like

on a team of something it's like there's those followers like in the middle wait can i say something about like having one friend in one panel yeah it's well that's why when there's three friends there's always like gang ups and stuff yeah It's 2026 and I'm so ready for a closet refresh. I love shopping after the holidays because you have Valentine's Day to look forward to, a date night, going out with your girlfriends, chill weekend looks, and Revolve obviously has everything.

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365 day returns. Quince.com slash giggly. Can I say something about the workplace too? Yeah. The workforce, yeah. The workforce. It was very interesting and it was just Instagram, but I read it. oh good it basically said how being the smartest or best worker in your office does not really mean that you're gonna get a promotion that promotions more so go to like the safer person who's really like in with the social of it all.

Because I've been at companies where like I was the one who was like in meetings like trying to come up with new ideas or like disagreeing with something or being like What if we did this and like outside the box and I wasn't like going out afterwards with the company and then

I remember someone else got a promotion who smokes weed with the boss every weekend. And they basically were like, the person who doesn't speak up. Maybe you should have done drugs, Hannah. Again, drugs would have made me more successful. If they're like, if you're just like not a risk and like safer and just like a yes man, you're more likely to get.

a promotion, which I don't want to tell people. Wait, have you ever been promoted? I've definitely asked for a promotion, but told no. I've never, never even brought it up. I've multiple jobs. But the thing is, I'm so entrepreneurial that every job I just learned so much. I was like, I'm not going to be here much longer. I'll do it myself. Yeah. No, I remember like I went to my old notes and saw.

a thing from a review meeting and i wrote all the things that i did and i was like listing it out and i remember them being like you're fired this is so cupid You actually got fired last week. Why do you keep coming here? I didn't know. Are you still getting checks in the mail? Because that's an accounting issue. Like George Costanza and Seinfeld. It actually, low-key, is so funny to get fired.

Oh, it's literally like... Because you're just like, fuck you, I didn't want to work here anyway. You're like someone on vacation. No, getting... Getting fired as a people pleaser has been like the biggest growth for me as a human in my heart and my soul. Yeah. Also, we all have those jobs in your 20s where you're like, this is what I want to do for the rest of my life. And then you get fired and you're like.

um also one shout out i've been getting some dms about now let me just say page is number one job and she's incredible at it is doing the ads yeah every now and then i get a message being like i can tell that paige re-recorded this ad i can tell that she fought for her life to pronounce One of these words. And I just want to let you guys know you need to support her and you need to support us. And she's trying her fucking very best. This is her one job. Do you know how hard it is to read?

20 ads. She has the reading level of a second grader. What people aren't understanding is that... I'm not just reading the ads. I'm writing. I'm making them up as I go. She's a wordsmith. It's not like the brand sends you exactly what to read. She's a novelist. They're like... And make it your own. And I'm like, okay, well, in my life, I would cough here. I would mispronounce this word. There's so many times where I've had to re-record ads and Hannah has been like, babe.

You're dyslexic. And I'm like, no, I'm not. And it's like, okay, you had to say LMNOP and you said it backwards. Do you remember that one time I followed you? I was like, I know for a fact I didn't say it wrong. And then I re-listened and I was like. Maybe I am dyslexic. No, I'm definitely something, but it's like, we're out of school now, so it doesn't really matter, and I'll live with it.

Can I come for a moment? Was that the only thing you wanted to say? Just like for people to like stop judging how I read. Thank you for bringing awareness. I haven't started my book yet. But it also was funny because obviously like I'm not listening to all the ads you do. Okay, here's the reason why I do the ads. Because when Giggly Squad first started, Hannah edited the podcast, I did the ads. Now that we have Grace, like I send the ads to Grace, she'll edit them, she'll edit the podcast.

I just never stopped doing the ads because, like, it's part of my routine. It's part of my thing. Yeah. And I wrote the book. And Hannah and her mom wrote the book. But you talk to Grace so much more than I do. So I feel like it's our thing. It's what like keeps us. By the way.

I would love to help with the ads. We just like, we have a lot going on and it could change tomorrow. It's not sustainable though for the ads to like split them up because it's, they're all in, it's just easier to go and do it all. Once you start, you can flow. And also you're really.

good at recommending things like you know it's good well that's the other thing with the ads i've personally like been like yes yeah i use that hair product yes so like it makes more sense for me to do it a hundred percent and but It is interesting because we've gotten some questions during live shows. Like, how do you, like, we both just do the things that we're good at. And that's it.

which we haven't figured out what those things are, but we'll get back to you. Also, I was with a man, not Des. Yeah. Not an affair. And I just have, oh my God, men are so fascinating. We're like. he was trying to find somewhere with directions and it's the classic like how men don't ask for directions and i'm like can we just check the phone because if we're walking the wrong direction for like 10 minutes i'm gonna be pissed and he's like don't give up don't give up and i'm like give up

I'm just trying to do better and we get to this we're shopping someplace and he was like I'm like let's ask the person where we were looking for like slides yeah and he was like flip-flops and I was like let's ask where they are it's a huge store and he's like Well, I'm not giving up. And I'm like, we're not, you're not a hunter. You're not impressing me right now. This is not being filmed for television. You're wasting my damn time. This is a survivor. No one's judging you.

Ask for help. I don't think they like to, especially to another guy. I think that's why they don't like to ask directions because it's always to like. When you stop to ask directions, it's usually like a gas station. It's like a guy or whatever. But in like a store or just general help. Yeah. One thing about me, the second I walk in a store, if I know what I need, I am going straight to a person. I said, I'm helpless. I'm scared.

No, I'm the person on customer service. Zero, zero, zero. Give me a real freaking person. I'm SOS on my forehead, except when I don't have anything to shop for and I'm just like perusing. Yeah. I'm so scared of conversation because as a people pleaser, they're probably doing fine. But all I hear is.

Do you want to buy that? Are you sure? Do you want to buy it now? Do you want to buy it now? And I'm like, I would love to support, but I'm so scared. Okay, that actually brings up a good point because I feel like I keep seeing that, like... For whatever reason, it's very trendy to have a sister.

Like all my TikToks are like, and here's my sister. And we're like, you had a sister this whole time where it's like, and this is my twin. And it's like, and it's all these TikToks of like girls and their sister relationships, which I so like envied my whole life. Then I saw this girl make a TikTok and she was like, wow, I don't have a sister. And so I feel like no one's ever actually told me the truth in my whole entire life because sisters are so like.

Yeah. No, you look disgusting. Why would you do that? Or like you're acting like a weirdo. Like they're very. I think our moms do though. So I like was sitting there and I was like, oh my God, has anyone ever told me the truth? And then I go, wait a minute. I have text messages and emails about how I can improve and things that I can change. I was like, wait, I've been told the truth. 10 times more than any fucking sister out there. Wait, isn't it cute that like our moms become our sisters now?

Well, now that I'm in my 30s, something will happen. And it's not like, oh my God, I have to tell my mom because she has to fix it. It's like, I have to tell my mom because she's going to have great... come back to it. Also, I saw this hilarious stand up by I'm going to insert the name. Casey Shurnima. She was saying how isn't it funny how your dad is just kind of like your mom's boyfriend.

And how like you'll be going out to dinner. It's like, do you want to, are you bringing him? What am I supposed to talk to him about? Like when you go to the bathroom, just like hang out with your boyfriend. I love the TikToks where it's like, why would I talk to my best friend's ex? And it's like, it's their dad. He's literally just like the guy that she got sperm from. When your mom first complains to you about your dad for the first time, it's so funny. I said something the other day.

Like I was on the phone with my mom, but usually she has me on speaker. So like, should we break up with anyone in the kitchen could be listening. And I said to her like, and I just don't relate because like I come from a household where like the woman is in charge and like, she's the smartest. And my dad goes. Okay. And I'm like, so I don't identify that your dad is in charge because at my house?

We don't care where he is. But she's made him think that he has some power. And he's listening. He goes, what the hell? I think he's firing against me. My mom's like, she's just. but your dad is literally your mom's boyfriend that like yeah hangs around and it's like he's always hanging around her so he's like picking her up from places also because i'm getting older i am that family member i did oh my god

I did that thing, which, you know, your family member will like call you someone else in the family's name. And you're like, how could you do that? I called Lois Andrea, who's my other little cousin. Yeah.

And I'm like becoming everything that I was annoyed at like my older aunts for doing to me. Like I'm the person that walks up to her and goes, you're getting so big. Yeah. And you know, when you're little and someone says that, you're like, I'll blow my brains out. You're the eighth person that told me that today. But you like.

It's like human nature. You just become your aunt. Yeah, you just become your mom. I'm just becoming every... I'm like, you used to be so little. I could tell her a whole story that she doesn't care about. I'm like, you used to run up and down the stairs. Those cheeks. And now you're like, look at you. She's like, I'm 16. Shut up. Oh, also, I wanted to formally apologize.

Last episode we recorded. It was really nice out. And I was like, shall we walk back to your place? Yeah. And you stupidly, you get tricked every damn time. damn time i'm with you because i distract you with some good gossip i'll be like let's talk about this and we're walking and look it's a flow state walking gossiping and then you were wearing your i was wearing ballet flats

And it was the first time I was wearing them. Like I had gotten them at the Woodbury Common Outlet, which is just like, there's nothing better than getting something at an outlet store. Yes. That's real shopping. It's real shopping. I respect that. Yeah, because you have to like go in and like look around. You have to park. One time I was at Woodbury Common Outlet and I was, I'm not kidding, I was eight years old.

And sometimes they would do... Peek it at my goal weight. Okay. I was... I've never been skinnier. And they used to do... Sometimes they would do like... It was like sample sale pop-ups, but it was just like food sampling. I got excited. It was just like extra stuff that either like they couldn't sell or whatever, but it wasn't the store name. Like it was an empty store name. So any brand could be in there. And I remember one time Burberry was in there and they had these Burberry pink and brown.

like rain boots and I could and I found one of them okay and I was like oh the other one is obviously like they have it in the back they're not putting two because they want people to steal it or whatever I had one in my hand and I'm little like I'm a child and I'm like shopping with my mom so I go up to her and I'm like I have this boot and this is the boot I want to buy so she goes up to the counter and she's like we need the other boot

And she was like, oh, the other boots out on the floor, like it must just like be somewhere. And my mom was like, OK, well, we'll look for it. She made you scavenger hunt? Well, it looked like a sample sale. So it was like shit was all over. Yeah. This woman was holding the other boot and now we're up at the counter. And so I'm a child. So I'm like. Hey, that's my boot. Hey, like I have the other boot and like I'm about to pay, like that's my boot. And my mom gets into a fight with this woman.

And the woman was like, no, I'm not giving you the other boot like I had it first. And my mom was like, well, how do you know that you had it first when my daughter, who's a child, is holding the boot? Anyway, long story short, I actually don't remember what happened, but I do know that I don't have those boots. So I must have not, I don't know what happened, what my mom. And that's what like built character back in the day. Being at a mall, seeing everyone. I know that I was revved up.

OK, I was devastated and couldn't believe I didn't leave with the boots. So now every time I go to Woodbury Common Outlets, I'm a savage. Like, you want to cut me in line? I don't think so. I think about those. boots from 1998 and I'll never let that happen again and like clicking something to buy on Amazon will never give you that thrill of like that was war like you were hunting and also I hate that sample sales are such a New York City thing because

We could have competition. Like if they did sample sales all over the country. Do they not? No, because all like the place, like the design district. Always in. Cause look, I love a sample sale. I'm at the point now, if I go a whole day without spending money, I feel like I made money. I'd be dead. If I go a whole day without spending money, someone check on me because I'm dead.

So anyway, you texted me the next day and said, I'm bleeding out from your ankles. Because some of these designer shoes. From my ankles. Hannah. I had 12 blisters in total. You guys, we walked for 10 minutes. I had six on each foot. We walked for 10 minutes. And I actually, that night, was going to apologize to you because I felt in my heart of hearts that you were in pain because we have that connection. Do you want to know what pissed me off about it the most?

I had planned to get a pedicure later that day. I can't go to a pedicure chair bleeding out with open sores. I'd literally, I'd be like, just chop my feet off now of staph infection. I was literally going to apologize to you. I turned on Great British Bake Off. I'm pedicure-less. And I haven't gotten over it. So...

The moral of the story, don't listen to your friends when they want to walk or exercise because they're tricking you. I also wrote down I have a social media strategy. I realized like this is literally my social media strategy. It's two things. Whenever I post, like you have to have a purpose. Like what's your motive? What's your niche? I have two posts. What's your motive? Wait, I was really funny. Okay, good. What is going to make the gigglers laugh?

What is going to make them laugh? What is going to make them be like, he, he, he, kick their legs. And then what is going to rage, bitch? Rage bait page. What is going to rage bait page? So those are the two things I post. And if you look, there's nothing else that I post. It's laughter. And when I post a rage bait to page, you don't respond. Or if you're like.

Like, give me an example of a rage bait to me that you posted recently that I was like, hello. Oh, yeah. Well, like that's to you. Like, that's not to anyone else. That's just to you. After all the gigglers being like waiting on pages. You put it on close friends. Like wait till I see it. So those are the only two posts. And some of them are the same. Some of them rage bait and make the gigglers laugh. But that's all I post. Yeah. No, that's so true.

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I was going to say, did you see the very controversial take that Jennifer Lawrence had? Oh, that a dog bit her kid. So she was like, fuck that dog. Yeah, she was like, got rid of the dog. The comment. Oh, the comp. Well, she did say after that. It's not funny. She did say after that, like, I will obliterate any dog I see, which. I don't think she was being serious. It's Jennifer Lawrence. Obviously, she's not going to kill a dog.

But what a headline to give people. No, I was like, oh my God. When I saw it, I literally was scared to go in the comments because I was like. I've just said, hey, cats over dogs. There's something about dogs that represent like America. We're like, if you talk too bad about dogs, like you're not patriotic. So true. Because dogs are men. Not appropriate. But a cat. She's a lesbian. She's queer. She likes poetry. She drinks kombucha. Yeah.

She has piercings. No cat has ever bit a baby's face. She believes in witches. Yeah. But anyway, it was one of those moments where I like watched the clip and I was like, could have reasoning because I'm. A human where I was like, I totally get like if a dog bites your.

newborn baby's face, you're going to obviously be like, oh my God, I'm scared of this dog now. No, no, no. You don't mess with dogs and babies if a dog has ever showed aggression. But I was so scared to click the comments and then I clicked it and it was just like... I was like, oh, my. I'll never say another thing about a dog ever. We were joking last night about this because we were talking about you ever watch a video and.

you think the comments are going to have a certain vibe and you want to add to it and then you click on it and you're like, oh no, we are going in a complete different direction. There are some times where I'm like, wait.

the comments are a group mentality and sometimes you are off like you think you're going to go down to be like silly goosey and it's like hate comments or sometimes you think it's going to be hate comments and everyone's like slay and you're like okay and it's usually like public

Like I'm trying to think of an example because I feel like that just happened. And I was like, wait, he's right. And the comments were like, how dare you? Yeah. But there's like an. Oh, you want to know what it was? There was a guy who was at a Broadway play. And he was with his nieces. You love a public meltdown. Well, that's very New York to be like, shut the fuck up. Well, I agreed with him because I'm sorry. When you go to the movies.

This is why like I will never go see like a, well, because I have a brain. I would never go see like a wicked type movie in the movie theaters because if someone started singing, I would be so annoyed. This is my problem. I'm not gonna... say something publicly against like a row of people. Like that scares me. I feel like if it's one person, you could give a little look or you wait for a more angry New Yorker to say something. If you didn't see the clip, the clip is of a like.

guy probably like in his 40s he's at a theater he stands up he's yelling like i need security over here security comes over and he's like this whole row is obnoxious they're singing the whole time they're now like using profanities he's there like his two like little nieces yeah i don't know what play they're at obviously one he was saying my nieces won't stop singing they're so fucking annoying and i think broadway is so different from the movie theater okay the movie theater fine

Broadway, the humans are up on stage. They're singing. You paid to hear them sing. Let them cook. Why would you make a sound at a play? I also... PTSD from like when you're on the bus and like a bunch of girls start singing a song and like you don't know the words. I've never been on that. That was so not me. Like anytime there was like a dance circle, I couldn't do that.

I actually any like performing like that. I was like, no, I saw a crazy altercation at an air on a plane recently. And I hate talking too much about flights, but like it is prime time for drama. Tell me who's in the wrong. Okay. Okay. So this lady is going to her seat. You're witnessing this firsthand. Firsthand. This lady is getting to her seat. And above her.

is someone's jacket okay she takes the overhead bin in the overhead bin okay she takes out the jacket and says whose jacket is this looks at me because I'm next to her wasn't mine okay first time I'm innocent And the guy behind me already. Don't touch my shirt. The guy behind me was like, that's mine. And she goes, you can't put your jacket here and tosses it to him. Oh, OK. And it was so wrong. It was dead.

It was Dez's jacket. It was Dez's jacket. Oh my God. Now, mind you, across from her was an open, like there was room. Okay. Now, there's different. The bin is not assigned to that seat. That's the thing. Your bin is not assigned. Or they'd have numbers on the bins. And it's first come, first serve. Correct.

And what she could have done, what I've done in situations where like I'm going to sit and someone's jacket or things they could put underneath is there you turn to the person who works there. Yeah. And you say, hey. How would you think you can fit this up there? And then she can handle that in a professional manner. Don't touch my stuff. She pulls out his coat and throws it at him. I would have thrown it right back at her. Throws it at him and does.

flies all the time, so he knows his rules. He was calm as a gentleman, as he could be. There was people walking through and overheard and said, Merry Christmas to her. And they were like, she's in a bad mood. And this lady just... sat back down. How old was the lady? She was like 65. Where were you flying to, may I ask? Or where were you coming from? I don't remember, but she...

Then she was sitting in front of me the whole time. I was like, this woman disrespected my husband. Even someone hurts someone you love. Yeah. it's a different anger yeah but then i was more i was texting des and i said first of all i'm so proud of you for being so calm because in the moment i was like you could say something kind of snippy like no i would have freaked out he was so calm but i i told him i said

She whatever is happening. Don't take it personally. She's going she has this kind of interaction with people all day Yeah, like she's full of anger has nothing to do with you. She's projecting on you She's probably having a rough time and that's how she was she traveling alone No, she had her husband with her. And he didn't say anything? He was scared. What a beta.

What were we talking about before this? Because I feel like I was going to say something. I have another hot take. Oh, my God. I know. Hot take Sunday. The best compliment comes from. A child under five. Yes. Yes. But also the most painful remarks can come from. A child under five. They can make or break you. Yeah. They're not holding back. They'll see you do something and be like, why are your arms so sweaty?

Oh my God. It's like in the morning, Lois will like jump into my bed, throw a book at me and make her read to me and then go, ew, your breath smells bad. I'm like, okay, you first of all. Put a gun to my head, force me to read. Don't let me brush my teeth and then bully me for having bad breath. What kind of abuse is this? I love like a child. Like I wonder at what age your brain is like, oh.

I can't say, like, you just don't say, because you're not consciously like, oh, I don't, I can't say that anymore. Yeah. But it's like, you just don't say certain things. If a kid says you're funny or pretty, like. Yeah. Retire. Honestly, Christmas Eve mass. I was next to like three little boys under eight years old. They were obsessed with me. And I was like.

It's like, wait a second. Well, that's why it's like, yeah, I'd rather the little kid like me than these adults that are projecting their own shit that they've experienced on their life towards me. I want the pure form of honesty. Yeah. I corner a girl. I'm like, do you think I'm a good person? Yeah. was a princess, I was like, she looks at me and she's like, she's magical. When Lois looked you up, she literally was like, I'm watching a Disney movie.

And she looked at your tights. When she slowly touched my tights, I was like, if I don't have a daughter, I'll kill myself. We know you're going to have like the most the most dirty, annoying son. Yeah.

I'm looking at my notes and I farted at the coffee shop. I talked about that. I need some advice from you about organizing my clothes. Yeah. I'm in a minimalist mode. Hannah, I went through all my clothes yesterday And not yesterday. I meant like over the past couple of weeks. I want to throw everything out and start over. I actually hate everything I've ever worn before. I don't know if it's like where we are in our life. I think that's what it is. I want everything on.

so I was like going through my stuff but it's this people don't talk about there's this kind of piece of clothing that you own that you've worn before you like it but you normally would like probably pick other stuff over it but you can't get yourself to throw it away because like it's been worn and you don't not like it right and I think that is what my closet is full of yes of stuff that like I've I've looked good in it before

if you said would you want to wear it tonight i'd say no but i can't get myself to throw it away yeah and like i don't know what to do i feel like my thing is It's like such specific pieces that I'm like, I can't wear that. But then you're like. I'd be so mad if something comes up and that was perfect. Yes, that's what it is. Or I also I used to have like this thing where if I wore something like outrageous, I would be too nervous to wear it. I'd be like, no, like people aren't.

gonna get it they're gonna think it's ugly or like whatever see i love you in those and my mom like tricked me when at a very young age where like i snapped out of that yeah she would always say like whenever i'd have that feeling she would always say if another girl walked in wearing it how would you feel

And if the answer was, oh, I'd feel so jealous, she'd be like, then wear it. Wait, that's such a good shopping thing to think if you saw someone else with it. But my problem is I have a lot of clothes that I like that like. If another person wore, I'd be like, that's sick. But then on me, it looks fucking bad. That's not true. It's just all about like how they style it. You're right. Styling. I should. I think your new style is going to be.

I think you need more flowy like pants that aren't jeans. You guys say you hate my outfit today? No, no. I don't hate your outfit. I mean, I don't know what it is. I was going to wear white capris today. With a little white t-shirt. I was so page coded. But then you could see my white sports bra through the white t-shirt and I panicked. Because you...

Have such, like, a long, beautiful torso. Like, I think you should be more, like, tighter tops and then flowy pants. Like, flowy, wide-legged. Not, like, super wide-legged, though. Like, what kind of... material are we talking i don't know like honestly you know what i'll have my mom make a duck i'm lost i need kim to do a full powerpoint but no you're right like i your silhouette you have such a good

You really do have such a good shape where I'm like a board. And so it's like I have to wear certain things that makes it look like I have a good butt. But it's like it's not there. Where you have such a good shape but you never accentuate it and it actually really annoys me. me that you never show your boobs you sound just like my mom also i was gonna wear capris and show off my boobs today and this is what i ended up in great i was so fucking close have you seen the u.s

ice skating championships are on. I only saw one clip about how like everyone's family died in like a plane crash prior to. oh remember that plane crash like what was that last year but it was like a bunch of figure skater families so now it's what it's all of them are competing like

I didn't know that. Yeah, because the one guy that's like about to go to the Olympics, he was holding up a picture of his parents and they had died in that flight. I think that was like exactly a year ago. Jesus Christ. So anyway, that's intense. Sorry. That's a girl's mood. But good context, for sure. No, it's...

You watch these people's like dreams come true as they're like making the Olympics or not. But I can't stop thinking about heated rivalry and how like in another world, these gay hockey players were just ice skaters. Yeah. Gay hockey players are just men who like.

couldn't get themselves to ice skate meanwhile if you're an ice skater and you're with the woman all you're doing is like holding her crotch and spinning her it's like male cheerleaders yes like they're actually the ones who get they're actually fingering them Just watch, bring it on. That's why the male cheerleaders join. Culture yourself. Final culture moment that we talked about yesterday that I have to bring up is the...

Rewriting of history of Jersey Shore. We have to apologize. Can we apologize? I love Jersey Shore. There's nothing that shaped who I am as a person more than Jersey Shore. And you recently met JWoww. And I've like hung out with JWoww. I've met like... family adjacent to her. I actually have like a weird connection with JWoww because she's from my hometown and my brother knows like her boyfriend's mom. It's like a whole.

We're sisters. We're sisters. She brought her daughter the day we filmed our Amazon show. Which is crazy because we remember before she even met that guy. So being able to talk to her about reality TV is so interesting. because we did it in completely different eras of reality TV. Yes, so different. And so they always talk about how producers were not that involved, because they were so good at the casting, I would assume.

But for whatever reason, where reality TV now, it's like producers can, well, they can ruin your life. And they know like what they need in an episode. So they just get it. Where back then they were like, what could happen? But when I recently rewatched Jersey Shore and I was like, I actually felt really sad at a moment because I was like, wait, I was a senior in high school. I would watch this and I would watch.

Ronnie just literally abused the shit out of Sammy. And everyone would be like, Sammy's so annoying. It was crazy. Looking back now, I'm like. We need to do a formal apology to Sammy Sweetheart because she was enduring like everyone's been through. If that aired now. Well, he. Immediately. No, he'd immediately be obviously removed from the show. Yeah. We literally were like, Sammy, you're no fun. He threw her bed outside and we were just like, Sam, again. And then you're crying again.

Sam, can you stop complaining? You're so annoying. And then when she was like, I'm going to leave. And everyone was like, don't leave, don't leave. And I was like, guys. You were all just so mean to her. You were like, we hate you. She's clearly in this awful relation. Let her go home. And we're just like, Ronnie's just like having fun and Sammy's ruining it for him. No, it really makes me upset.

Don't make fun of my big toe. Don't make fun of her big toe. You can't throw her bed out of the apartment and come for her looks, which leaves me with our mental health moment. If a man.

makes you feel that's it if a man and move on with your life if a man makes you feel ugly at any moment even if you are ugly in that moment leave him oh that's really good it's so true like remember those relationships where like in theory it should be good but like you just didn't feel good gorgeous around him even though you knew you are

Yes. I actually haven't felt that I feel like since like my early 20s. Also know those guys who you know you look like shit, but when you're around them, he makes you feel like you're just like... a model off duty. That's just like guys being insecure. Wait, before we go, did you see that one TikTok couple that I actually, we'll insert their names.

He's like a chef. He's a chef and she always has like funny videos and it's like in their family, they just built this like gorgeous house. They've been like a TikTok couple for years. They've been together since they were like 14. She actually made a TikTok and was like, we are officially. together more years than we've been apart she found out he was cheating on her and she like immediately left and I just think that's such a good message anyway that's all I wanted to say

No, I was really devastated by their divorce. I was like, wait, they were like the only TikTok couple that I was ever like. Oh, they seem like normal because I felt like they didn't share that much personal stuff. All their videos were like funny. Well, they couldn't. He's in another woman's bed. Right. He was in another relationship. He's like, hey, can't tell you what I did today. But there was a lot of people being like, let this just be.

a message like the moment you feel like that or you find something out yeah leave which like But I'm a hypocrite. It is. Yeah, it is really hard to leave. Sammy stayed. Yeah, we've all stayed. Totally. And don't feel bad for staying. You'll be fine is our mental health. moment of the week enjoy your week you guys i know that we have a second episode coming out on friday and love you bye

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