So what are we doing right now? Because I feel like people got into this scared mentality of like, oh my gosh, I have to hold so tight onto what's mine and protect mine. And now it's like, that's not that's not that's not how we flourish, that's not how we thrive. And so with someone who has a tight grip on their life, they're like, well, I can't. I can't do this, Carlos, because you don't understand. My life
is too hard. Like if I if I lose grip of anything that I have, or if I, like, if I lighten up, or if I try to like get outside of myself, it's all going to fall apart. Like how someone who's so caught up in the scarcity mentality and the fear mentality, how how does one start to start to chip away at changing that? And I know this is your book, so okay, let's do this. How to be Human? How do you chip away at the old limiting beliefs that do not serve us as humans
and us as a collective. How do we chip away at these fearful judging Hey, hey, where we actually like sometimes hate each other and don't even know each other? How do we how do we shift that mindset and recalibrate? And I know you talk about that in your book How to Be Human, But like, what are some like ways to just start stepping into that? Yeah? Uh, start looking in the mirror more often than you're looking through your telescope. Right, So it's like, okay, what is I mean?
I go through it in my book, like what is the bias I have in my life? Like start asking you and again this isn't I'm going to tell you these things. But this isn't easy. I know people are gonna be like, well, Carlos, that's not easy. I want something easy. This isn't like like it's not you know, but it is, um it is. It is going to be so important to self reflect on exactly who we are. So like, see your own bias biased me is like what I don't like or what no bias biases? Is?
Uh something you believe about somebody else that isn't you based on your own experience without like actually getting to know So again, for instance, very you know I as a black guy in the South, right, Like every time I've been called the N word in the last few years, you know that I've lived here in very traumatizing experiences, Dave. It was every single time it was by like an old white dude with like an American flag on their bumper sticker or something. And so what what did that
do in me? It created a bias in me towards old white dudes with life flags with the American flags, right, And so that is a true bias in me. But is that true about old dudes, most old dudes with white American No, Like, that's not that's not true about them. But it's a bias that was created because of true experiences.
So you know what I've gotta do is I've gotta look that bias in the face and say, Okay, this was true about six guys, but it's not true about the rest of them, and I've got to break that. I gotta break that. And so I just think if we start looking at our own biases and we all have them, I've got them, you've got them, everyone listening to the podcast has them, and start calling them out, facing them in the mirror. I think we're gonna start
to deconstruct some of those. But how do you protect yourself? Because here it is, you've had six experiences with old white dudes with American flags who called you the N word. I mean that's something to make yourself want to be protected against. And I feel like that that can be Like the issue is like, how do you Yes, there's a bias, rightly so, but how do we not have it? How do you not walk into that? Well? You have to protect you have to protect your I mean, listen,
don't stand on issues. I don't stand an issue. To walk with people doesn't mean I'm going to place my mental health uh in a in a in a bad place. It doesn't mean I'm gonna go like like like, I'm not going to go find a KKK rally tomorrow and walk in and go like, hey guys, my name's Carlos. I'm ready to be your friend, right Like, No, there's protections that have to place around my my mental health in order to do this right. So we have to be smart. There's gonna be people that you're not gonna
be able to walk with. There's gonna be people that you're not going to be able to stand with. There there will be, but there will be people that you can. So again, just because you can't with one person doesn't mean you throw the baby out with the bathwater. Find those that you can. There will be ones that you are able to stomach. Right, me and my best friend on planet Earth stand on completely opposite sides of the aisle politically, okay, like vehemently opposite sides, Like we we
really disagree on a lot of important things. Really jacked us up our friendship. So you know what I said, We're going to find something to root together with together on. So we bought Nashville SC Soccer tickets and we go on when Nashville st Is playing, we go to Joda's Park. We stand next to each other and we high five and we scream and we root for Nashville s C. And what is that doing? We found something that we can cheer for together and it's healing us. So I'm
walking next to him, I'm walking with him. Walking with somebody doesn't mean changing their mind on something. It just means walking with them. So how are we going to seek this into the heads of the politics, like the people who are actually running? And I know you have Sharon Sesso as you are. I don't even know her real name, but Sharon Sesso who is to be? I like, don't follow a lot of news or media because I don't like hearing all of the biased opinions out there.
But Sharon is the one I follow because I feel like she gives the best factual information across the board about what is happening in politics. And she knows everything about history and laws, and you brought your forward, which is amazing. So like, women, is it like people like her that is going to just slowly change the higher? I think? So I think, you know, um, I think it's who we vote for, right, so like like like
we're actually in charge. So like what if you can't like what if you can't stand with either one because you're like that they both have Like that's where I like this Mark rom Like there's like such downfalls to like all of it, you know, yeah, yeah, yeah, you know there. I don't think there's gonna be a perfect solution, um, and there's definitely not a perfect party, you know, but but you have to I just think if we can put more passionate, empathetic people that even that may vehemently
disagree with each other. But I mean I look at that like nineteen eighties, like Tip O'Neil and Ronald Reagan. Literally the Speaker of the House in the president United States, vehemently opposing different political parties. Were best friends, like like their kids called each other uncle's right. Like so it's like it's possible to humanize each other while you still disagree, right,
And that's the part that we're missing. And so that's what you're really trying to remind us all that, Like we don't just have to hate each other, like literally we can totally agree, but like I feel like that's what's happened, Like we just hate each other. It's like we disagree and then it just hate and then not only just hate us, like that person needs to like go down, you know. Yeah, that's true, and we can't. We can't live it that way