63 (Part 2): Flash Gordon (1980) – Starling Productions – Dir. Mike Hodges – Sam J. Jones, Melody Anderson & Max von Sydow

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Again, Goblins and Ghouls, this is part two of Flash Gordon. Last time we had so much, I say the royal we, largely me, I'm very excited about covering this one. We had so much to say about Flash Gordon that we realised that we were going to cruise well over. And people's partners wanted to go to bed. Yes. And, you know, real life got in the way.

So we called a pause at the point of the movie, round about the three quarters of the way, Mark, wherein Flash and Prince Baron are whisked away by the Hawkman. Because Voltan wants a word, apparently. So that is where our story is picking up back now, back up again. And yes, that's where we're going to be discussing from. Britain, an ancient kingdom with legends of violence, cruelty, and torment in its blood. Join your hosts.

Ross, John and James as they bravely tread where few would dare. Witness their journey into the horrific history of British horror. They are... The General Witch Fighters. You'll think it's a scream. See Flesh Gordon battle gigantic monsters from another planet. Will Flesh escape from the iron jaws of death? Look! Flesh Gordon. An outrageous parody of yesteryear's superheroes. It's the eighth one of the world. Oh, boy. Rated X, not to be confused with the original Flash Gordon.

So as they're being taken to the Hawkmen's kind of floating kingdom, and I did wonder what sort of fuel that thing uses to keep it going. It's burning fuel. So I'm like, oh, now they top this up. Anyway, doesn't really matter. However, we also see that War Rocket Ajax, which is a brilliant set, has been dispatched in order to basically go and... Peter Wingard on board. Yes, Klytus. Klytus is going to come and talk to this rebellious lot and basically kind of put them right. Is this...

Was Flash Gordon, it was after Star Wars, but was it before Empire Strikes Back? Let's find out. Probably the same year. Because it's interesting that we see Klytus's sleeping arrangements. So it's similar to we see in Darth Vader's sort of bedroom ball. Meditation chamber, Ross. Is that what it's called? It officially is, yes. However, I've put down how amazing it is that they have to sort of knock on his door.

And he's laying down. He's having a little nap on the job. Why not? As one of Britain's laziest men, I fully approve of that. But when we have self-drive cars, maybe we'll have our little... Oh, that'd be good. And then it's just kind of like a bit of a chill out room as well, isn't it really? And he's like, let me know when you get there. When he's had enough of disco dancing and poppers. Exactly.

Well, Peter Wingard, probably that was the case. Yeah, he did sound really cool. I would love to have met him. He sounded amazing. Yeah, yeah. I would love to see him as Dracula. That would have been great. Oh God, yeah. I think he would have been excellent with his moustache. Yeah. Yeah. Like the, the, the, the, um, the original. Often mustachioed, isn't he? Peter Wingard, not Dracula. I wonder if he was mustache, mustachioed underneath the, uh, the mustache.

Underneath the mask. Like Cesar Romero as the Joker in 1960's Batman, just painting his sash. Maybe that's why they made him wear a gold helmet. This is a character which is... created for the film. It wasn't in the script. Oh, interesting. So it was obviously like, we need a Darth Vader in this. Yes. Yeah, yeah, definitely that.

Like a mix, like a disco Darth Vader. So like a boxy 3PO, but at the same time. I love the way he pronounces earth. Disgust. I didn't mention that on the first day. It's, what will you do with this? Also, as we said last time, everyone's having a lot of fun with this film, aren't they? All the supporting cast are just enjoying themselves greatly and are making this thing.

Uh, so meanwhile, back in the, uh, the Hawkman kingdom, our heroes are re or now all in the same place. Yeah. So we, uh, Zod, I've got all the names. Zod off. And Gaylarden. Yes. Yeah. I'm reunited with... Flash, this is where she says she wants to have his children. And yeah, I've put down, it's a very unorthodox engagement. Yeah. He's just like, do you want to get married? Yeah, right. Has he been on his flying motorbike? Not yet. That's coming.

I'm a bit, I think I'm slightly confused about the narrative. But also, you'd imagine, so they'd been together probably about 10 minutes. Yeah. Then she passed out. Continuously, yes. Passed out, woke out for a short period of time, then was...

separated from him, and been constantly being sexually harassed the whole time. And when she sees him, the first thing she thinks is, I want to have children with you. I thought you'd be put off it for life. She's had too many poppers as well. Maybe she's still feeling the effects of Ming's ring. Yes. Possibly. They've all been to Studio 54, haven't they? Yeah. Before this, even though we're not in... What was Peter Stringfellow's...

Club called. Have they been doing that? Was it called that? Was it really? Can you believe he's dead? That's that amazing bit on Brass Eye, isn't it? Like one of the short clips they put before the breaks in Brass Eye with Chris Morris going to him. So your name is... And he goes, Stringfellow. And he goes, and your nightclub is... String fellows. And the girls that work there, they are string fellow girls. And he just has him saying string fellows over and over and over again. It's fantastic.

2018 he died. Did he? Yeah. Is that after he was in Mad Max Fury Road? 77. He was older than he looked. He was born in 1940. Good God, from Sheffield. You carry on. I'm going to try and find out when Stringfellows opened. And what did he die of? I would say the set design for the Hawkman planet doesn't really feel like it's in keeping with the look. I felt like all the other sets looked like... Ming's palace looked like something where Ming belonged there. I felt like the Arborea was spot on.

Whereas this didn't really feel like... It doesn't look very hawkish, does it? Do you feel that this could have been... It's not like a nest. No, exactly. An example, Ross, where, you know, you said how the Italian production designers... factor in the cameras and you said that they made sets that they never used do you reckon this could have been a bloody hell yeah maybe they did have a giant a giant nest but did you um did you hear the story about um

The director got a phone call one Sunday from the producer and he was just shouting numbers down the phone at him. And then he realised that he was watching Wales play rugby and he was calling out the numbers of the shirts for the people he wanted to play Hawkmen. And he was like, I don't think... I don't think they're going to be up for hanging from wires for months on end. In front of a million watts of power.

I feel that there's a Dino De Laurentiis podcast somewhere. Yes. Anyone out there. To watch all of his films. Yeah, that would be amazing. That'd be good. Yeah, maybe. So in 1980, he did sell the Millionaire Club in Manchester, moved his whole family to London, where he opened Stringfellow's Covent Garden. That's the one.

So that's what all this cast were up to. They were all there every night, weren't they? With Stringfellow. I imagine so. Bigging it up. Back to Flash Gordon. And we get this bit where Voltan says, right, Flash.

And Baron, you two have to fight to the death. And I put down, I love this bit as a kid. This is one of the scenes that absolutely imposed on me large. So the floor that has spikes coming out there, they have to fight on this, you know. uneven surface, topsy-turvy, spikes come out of it. And once again, in a bit, this is very horror movie. If you think about it, this is kind of, what, what happens to Clytus when Clytus turns up? It's very, once again, kind of.

Death by falling onto something that looks like an Iron Maiden. Yeah. It's very horrible. It reminds me of that couch of tea when someone fell on some railings. Lynn, I've tried on a spike. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Or when Bobby Davro falls on his face. Oh, God. Oh, Bobby. Oh, Bobby. Ross is going to cut that bit in now, isn't he?

Oh, Bobby. Bobby. Oh, don't touch him. Sorry, this is already gone. I haven't even had a drink tonight. No, you shouldn't laugh at Bobby. Are they all still with us? No. Lion's gone. Quite a few have gone. Lionel's not with us anymore. Davro's still there. Davro's still going. Cheggers has gone. God, you're old Poppy. So...

Those two start fighting and it is tremendous. Flash tries to get Baron to join with him and says, look, we're not enemies. And once again, I've put, I really like this about this film. The whole... if you all work together, you can beat Ming. Stop being so selfish. It's a bit like with Trump. Yes. One of the things I like, because I've watched this a few times, I was watching the reactions of other people who aren't talking in it.

So there's a bit when... How many times have you watched this, Cleaps, and noticed this? Six times now. I don't make notes. I just watch it just before I talk to you. That's fresh. You're insane. Yeah, so Brian Blessed thinks when he says you've got to do a trial by combat thing, which one day I would love to have a trial by combat for something. It's quite Star Trek, the original series. You could play some Star Trek fight music at the top of it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

You can see that Voltan thinks that he's going to be picked to fight Baron. Yes. And he's having a couple of like... Sly looks at some of the other hawk men and the other hawk men are doing this sort of like weird sort of like bird head movements and stuff in the back. Are their wings attached or are they mechanical?

Robo wings. I don't know. It's never established. It's never established. There's lady hawk women. Yeah, you see his daughter. Did we see them? Yeah. Well, you see his daughter. You see his daughter. And there's some lady ones on the side. I don't think they've got wings. I'm not sure. His daughter does. Anyway. Um...

Yes, but then Flash has to fight Baron. And it really annoys me that if you don't want to throw his gloves off of the platform, you're not going to get them back. But if you're Prince, I suppose you can just get him for it. Yeah, he's got bloody loads of gloves. So Flash wins and Baron should die. But of course, because he's a hero, Flash reaches over and grabs him, stops him falling to his death. And this moment of heroism makes Baron realise, yeah, actually...

this blonde haired American idiot in beige slats is worth. And yeah, let's, let's team up. So even though Brian Blessed was just shouting, let him die. Let him die. and then then he goes oh okay well let's all join up now then and all be friends have we at this point done any of the famous lines from the film such as

Gordon's alive! That's coming in a minute. Surely that's already happened! No, no, no, no. That's in a second. Because this alliance is immediately kind of stopped in its tracks by the fact that... War Rocket Ajax turns up, as does Klytus. Sounds like a sexually transmitted disease, doesn't it, Klytus? It's possible. So Klytus arrives and just basically says... you lot, stop being so rebellious. You're all in trouble. You know, Baron...

You're, you know, you're going to be going to prison. And then there's a classic sort of WWF tag team move, isn't there? Move. Yes, they work together and they throw Klytus onto the spikes, which, as I said, is very horror movie. Yeah. And I wasn't expecting that.

And his eyes pop out and his tongue phones up and comes out. And that is very Hammer horror film again. That was the other thing that I should have said in my preamble when we started talking about this film that feels very horror movie to me.

Someone being thrown to their death on a bed of nails. Yes. Their eyes and tongue popping out. Glory. Well, apparently the guy who plays Flash walked off set and had a massive argument because in the script it said that he... he hit someone from behind and he said that Flash would never attack anyone from behind. But he's got no problem about flinging a man onto some spikes. Yeah, fair enough. And he just...

Bring tremendous moral dignity to the part, doesn't he? So having done this, Boltown is like, you bloody idiots. Now they're going to blow up my kingdom. Everyone leg it! Run away! Run away! Run away! It's very sort of Wizard of Oz, sort of like the flying monkeys in the background, isn't it? And one of the best bits, though, is Flash is like...

Oh, let's pull down some of these silken drapes. We can make giant parachutes and float down to Arborea. Which I don't know why it's so stupid, but it is stupid. I don't know why. I don't know why they even left that line in. It's just like, just bollocks, isn't it? But yeah, but before anything else can happen, oh my God, another ship turns up. It's actually Ming. And Ming decides that he's going to turn up and...

have a, you know, have a chat with these, with this rebellious lot. This is where the director describes this as Satan coming to Jesus to offer him. Yes. Oh, right. I see. Yes. I guess where we are. Yes. So he's like, right, take away Baron, take away Dale Arden, take away Hans Zarkov, thus leaving Flash, he and Flash alone. And what he says is, look...

I'm going to, your earth is dumb for pretty much, but you know, there'll still be some stragglers. There will be some survivors left over and they'll need a ruler. And you know, you seem to have a fair bit of spunk about you young man, as I believe they, they sometimes say. And, you know, you could go and be their leader. And I put, imagine Earth being led by a man in beige slacks. But then again, I think, oh. It is at the moment. If you see Trump going golfing.

With his nappy on as well. Yeah, exactly. I know. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. And then that's why I put you on. I thought, actually, scrub that idea because that probably is what would happen. I imagine this is a similar conversation that Farage had with Putin at some point. it would destroy the UK but you can have what's left of it yes you can have the isle of wight so yeah flash says no and he goes ah well very well but in true villain style he doesn't just go right lads kill him

He's like, you stay here while I blast you into oblivion. Oh, and I should also point out that while Flash was fighting Baron... We had the classic flash. I love you, but we only have 14 hours to save the Earth. And what I wanted to point out was, how does Daylarden know this? What's his name? Topol told her on the way in. Has she got a watch on?

Well, he just worked it out. He said, I've just done some... Mental arithmetic. Yeah, so calculations. And we've got 14 hours, 21 minutes and 56 seconds or something. Yeah, that's the bad bit. And then later on as well, when he sets the eternal clock once again, like when we did Event Horizon, he talks about the ticking clock. This film does the ticking clock a little better, but as it was happening, I was like, yeah, I know.

That's what I thought. Yeah, because Ming's dead. Yeah, but it's not like there's a sense of relief and they're all like, oh, thank goodness. It's like, oh, we... Yeah, anyway. Well, someone's sitting there waiting, and he died to immediately turn off all the things which are happening. Right. Ming has just died, so that means that any decision he's made, forthwith does not...

yes turn off the death ray immediately return the moon to its original orbit yeah so Ming starts blasting the Hawkman Palace and flashback you know you think this might mean certain doom But he manages to find like an escape hatch. And the thing is, and this, John, is when he finds the rocket cycle. But what I've pointed out is, wait a minute, all the Hawkman can fly. So why would you need this? And so what I put is maybe for a Hawkman who's disabled or elderly. It's a mobility scooter.

Exactly, Ross. He's escaping on a mobility scooter. Yes. Shop mobility scooter. It's the kind of thing I'd need if I was a hawk, man. But I was thinking, you never see them breaking down, do you? You never see old people on the side of the road who run out of back. It does happen, I think. It does happen. So what happens, though, when they've got an emergency button they can press? RAC.

My lines here at this point, I've just put, this is an Italian disco freak out. And I don't know why I put that. I think it's all the laser beams all coming out of... The laser beams. And the lightning... The lightning field. The visuals in this part are demented, aren't they? I think they're trying to hide how bad the blue screen or green screen or whatever it is is. that looks like everyone's been drawn around with felt pen and isn't helped by a 4K restoration now, is it?

I think if you watch this on telly or on VHS in the 80s, it probably looked okay, but now it looks demented. Well, like the Queen did, because apparently when she met Brian Blessed, she said this was her favourite film, and she watches it every Christmas with her grandchildren. That's what Brian Glass had said. Wow. I might, if ever I meet Prince William, that's what I'd ask him. Did you watch Flash? Anyway, yeah. Flash escapes and that's when he contacts Bob's hand.

And that's, John, where we get the Gordon's alive. Gordon's alive. The classic. And he says, look, I'm flying to you. Come on. Let's team up. This is it. We've got to do this now. And so, yes.

They're all convinced by this. Meanwhile, cut back to the Imperial Palace and we get the fantastic line from Timothy Dalton. Somehow they've managed to write long live flash on the wall. Despite none of them having access to a pen. They're hung up in the dungeon. And he said, tell me more about this Poudini. Which I liked. I like that line. And once again, Timothy Dalton delivers it with aplomb. But they are then rescued by Ming's daughter. And the best bit is that the line is she put...

I never really, I never knew what my father really was. And I've just thought, oh, come on. I'm sure you did. It was all okay until he turned his meatness onto me. Yes. Surely that, that scene. we were introduced to all the characters and he killed that African prince. Surely you saw what he was then, my dear. But anyway, it doesn't matter. She just turned on him and turned his ring on him, didn't he? Yeah. And so she says,

you know, Baron, I love you. Let's, let's get back together. And of course he can't resist the fantastic. He's very Bond from this point onwards. He is James Bond from this point on. When he, when he takes the, um, the gun off of that sort of turret and then just goes back and kicks it over. Yes! Cool. And meanwhile, we are told that... Oh, we should someone edit that over the top, shouldn't we? Go on. Then...

Dale Arden is now, we're told that no, she's not going to be one of the space concubines anymore. He is now going to marry Dale Arden. And then they're getting her ready for the wedding. And this is the bit I just put, this film was insane. is the fact that we are told that Ming the Merciless will have, and I've written this down,

a power potion before he makes love. So what I put is that this is space Viagra. And I put, take that George Lucas. George Lucas wouldn't have the balls to put space Viagra in, would he? That's what I'm saying. So that bit is particularly nuts as well. Once again, this is a kid's film, allegedly. And then that's when they have like a cat fight on the bed, don't they? Yes. With all the other concubines sort of like peeping through little gaps while they're doing it.

I can't remember any of this. I probably skipped some of this. Fine, fair enough. And this is properly like when we're introduced properly to General Carla as well. We've seen her a couple of times, but I've just put General Carla is great. She needs more screen time. General Carla definitely needed way more screen time. I feel sorry for walking down that ramp in those high hills. Yes. We've also got the plan, Flash's plan, take shape, that he flies in.

towards the palace on his mobility scooter. General Carla is like, dispatch war rocket Ajax to bring back his body. Or is it Ajax, James? Right, yes, good. We're back to that again. Football. Ajax versus Ajax. Ajax. So Warwick at Ajax goes off in pursuit of Flash. Flash goes into a great big cloud where then a load of Hawkmen are waiting and cue big action sequence and cue Queen.

And then the scene which was then kind of ripped off in the last Star Wars film where they land on the Star Destroyer. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe. Yeah, yeah. It's just, oh, wow. This seems really familiar. Familiar? Yeah, yeah. And what they do in order to basically take... Say basically a lot. Very sorry. In order to take over War Rocket... I'm doing it now, John. You've got me saying it. Even though they call it Ajax in the film.

To take over War Rocket Ajax, they plant a mine on it, like a sci-fi space mine. But the best of it is, it's got an aerial, which you put down, looks like it's come off the Ford Cortina in the middle of it, in order to prime it. anyway my mini used to have and then it was replaced with a coat hanger and I've just put here my notes just says fantastic amounts of death

People are dying left, right and centre. Guards, talkmen, the lot. Days of improvised action because they'd had no storyboards and they'd directly hardly ever read the script. Ha ha ha! G'day America, it's Tony and Ryan from the Tony and Ryan podcast from Down Under. Today we want to talk to you about Boost Mobile, the newest 5G network in the country. Offering reliable nationwide coverage backed by a 30-day money-back guarantee. Love your service or get your... We'll see you next time.

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And so they are now going to fly. Some may say something else. Oh, hang on. Don't put that in. Sorry. I once got fired from a magazine for bringing that up. Sorry, John. Don't put that in. Okay, okay, cut that. Right, so Flash's plan... I'll just beep it. You can leave him that I got fired from a magazine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll put it at the end. So Flash's plan is that he is now getting...

fly War Rocket Ajax into the Imperial Palace in an attempt to kill Ming. Because what, or what, what does anyone else, presumably? Yeah, I was going to say that... That can't be his plan because he's got no idea exactly where Ming is in that building. In my note, at the end, he's very close to killing Dale Arden, who he loves. His plan is just to smash it into the building. It's got where all his friends are actually in there.

right yeah so what i love is as an american football player from earth he knows how to fly uh motorized um mobility flying Flying mobility scooter and an Imperial war rocket. We were told at the start of the movie he has taken flying lessons. But not a space rocket.

But of alien design? No. No, of course not. Not that we know of. So, there we are. Finally, we bring the movie towards its absolutely amazing finale. We're in. We have the wedding sequence going on and the bit that I really like when... They see that War Rocket Ajax is on its way back in. So they start, they let off all the defences. Yeah. And General Carla goes, in salute to Ming, we are firing off all the defences. And he gives a...

Fair enough. Which I really like. They've got that big banner saying all creatures will rejoice. On pain of death, which is good. That's very, very good as well. I don't know if I saw that bit. Oh, and then the other bit that I really like from this is Voltan says, Flash, you know, once you start, you know, once the rocket is on its final approach.

I'll fly. I'll hold, I'll grab hold of you and I'll fly you out of here. And he says, no, Voltaire, no, you know, I've got to sacrifice myself. And he's like, oh, you impetuous boy. And, you know, he tries to argue with him. But as he, as he leaves, he says. That must be some planet you Earth men come from. It's not bad. Discuss. Yes. Not too bad. And I just put, it's a very British evaluation of planet Earth. It's not too bad. It's all right.

And then, John, meanwhile, because they've got to try and turn off the lightning field, the defences, this is when we get freeze your bloody bastards. Freeze your bloody bastards. Yeah. So meanwhile, the inside assault team of Prince Baron. Zarkov managed to get in. They turn off the defences. They rip out the prosthetic eyes from Lubot. Again, very horrific.

How do they do that? How do they pull his eyes out? Or do they just try and take his glasses off? They just rip his glasses off, don't they? They do. Oh, it's awful. Again, it's horrific. General Carla tries to stop them. They shoot General Carla. She, and we've spoke about this already. She melts into a pool of like black liquid, which again, pretty horrific, pretty bad. And then the other thing is we then we're back to the wedding ceremony and guys, did you?

recognize the guy who was playing like the space priest, the guy doing, he had a very familiar face. You, you would have seen the film that he was most famous for. Is he in Good Carter? No, no. Or not, not that I'm aware of. I need to look again. He is one of the ghosts from The Shining. Oh, no way. You know the ghost who's with the person in that really scary bear suit? It's him.

Oh, good God. Yeah. Same year as this, The Shining? Shining a couple of years after, I think. Was it? I think it was 81. Possibly the same time, but again, what a couple of years that guy. From this to Kubrick or vice versa. He probably spent longer in filming The Shining for that sort of two-second... Yes. Did it 38 times. Yeah, 1980 as well. Wow, what a year. That was a good year, wasn't it? So, yes, they... And then before the...

Ceremony can be completed. They suddenly realise, oh my God, that's War Rocket Ajax. It's out of control. And it's about to smash into the palace. As Ross says, it's a very haphazard plan. Yeah, not a plan. And Del just moves to one side.

Yes. Yeah. He says, go Flash, go! She somehow knows that it's him flying it as well, which is great. And this is the point where... one of our final pauses to say is that on the documentary on the on the blu-ray that i've got they tell you that the original ross says that they didn't have any storyboards but they have on the blu-ray they show you that The original plan was that Flash was to leap out of the ship and then confront Ming.

And Ming would then turn into a massive dragon. Oh, that's his, like his ring is like, it's some kind of like a dragon. Interesting. The ring would envelop him and he would then transform into a huge dragon who flash would then fight. But apparently, again, on the one day, just said...

They're just like, that was the idea. And as they were making it, they were like, we've got no money to do that. No way. We've got to change it. All this sounds a bit Russell T. Davis at the end, doesn't it? Now you're describing it, it's really reminding me of... First, the Crimson Horror it reminded me of in Doctor Who when they've got a rocket which is inside a sweet factory or something, Cleaves. And it takes off and it causes no damage to the building at all.

And it doesn't burn anyone stood like a metre away from it. But it also reminds me of the Doctor Who one with David Tennant, that his last story, which has got Razalon in, Dalton. where he jumps out of a spaceship and comes flying down to earth and falls through a window and lands on the ground, but then just gets up with a few cuts and like a dusty seat.

Whereas Tom Baker fell off of a radio telescope and died. Yes. He would just be a bloody pulp, wouldn't he? Well, you haven't seen Chuty Gatwa's seat. He flies around on Flash Gorgon's... mobility scooter at the end in the last episode oh god does he yeah and uh you might want to cut this out ross but if you see that disney have have ended their partnership officially now officially yeah yeah okay cool it's back

It's back for Christmas 2026, Cleaves. Is it? Yes. Without Disney. I would imagine so, yeah. They haven't said yet, but I presume it's got to be. Well, they're doing the spin-off for Christmas. It's going to be out on BBC in December. the battle between the what's it and the what's it i've heard differently but it might be yes yeah i've heard that they're trying to keep it over until next year now because there's otherwise there's nothing for for

Like 18 months. I've heard that they're showing it in the UK in December, and then they're showing it on Disney Plus next year. Pointless. Yeah. Why are they even going to bother to show it now after they've... backed out of the agreement. They pay for it, I suppose. Well, yeah, but it... Anyway, I'm not going to go into all that bullshit.

So, to finish... I'm just going to say, I'm sure Ming turns into a dragon in Defenders of the Earth at some point. Yes, I'm sure he probably does. I think he may well do, Ross. He might be right. Defenders! So, the... But the spike, the nose of War Rocket Ajax, I'm going to keep calling it that, goes through the palace and skewers Ming. Skewers poor old Max von Sydow. To the back.

through the back and it looks because i remembered it through his stomach when i was a kid but i was totally wrong but i do remember it skewering him and being like yeah yeah and I think obviously for me as a child watching it that would have been the first time I'd seen anything like that so it's really imprinted on me green blood as well he's got green blood and pulls himself off of it as well yes and then like last thing we wanted to see was Ming pulling him

himself off in this film. Flash leaps out with a sword and says, it's over, Ming. Call off your attack. And then he says the amazing line, which is, my life is not possible. any earthling to give or take. Yeah, it's very good. Which is like a great deal of contempt and Maxon Sido really sells it really well. He turns his ring on himself. He turns the ring on himself. Yeah. And we see the ring falls to the floor.

Yeah. And he vanishes. And then in comes the floating, you know, the floating probe wig with Baxman Sido's voice. And we're told just in case there's any doubt whatsoever. Congratulations, Flash. You've saved your earth. Like he's done a computer game or something. Or a game show. It feels like that. And then we get like the grand final scene. Everyone's assembling in, like, the Great Hall. But what I've noticed is that someone's tattooed on the huge Ming's head.

realized in whatever that is fiberglass on one she's he's got like tears and then on the other one someone's just written mingy's dead yeah on the other one which is great And then... And then R2GT comes out all polished up and they pat him on the head. It's that kind of vibe. But we're told that...

Timothy Dalton is in charge, so I'm saying that's been a good result. Immediately, the Hawkmen go to war with the three men, because he doesn't think that's fair, because more Hawkmen died in the final battle. Yeah, maybe, maybe, maybe, maybe. And then the Hawkmen, even though once again, I doubt any of them can speak English.

they managed to align themselves to write the words, Flash! Flash! In Hawkman, which is amazing. Wow. And the amazing line of, they say, look, you're very, very welcome to stay here. And Dale Arden says, I don't know. I'm a New York City kind of girl. It's a little quiet around here for my liking, which I like in a very cheesy way. And then it says the end.

But then amazingly, of course, and it blew my mind as a kid. All of a sudden, it says the end and there's Ming's ring. And then all of a sudden you hear like that. And you hear his laugh. And a hand reaches in, puts on the ring, and it says the end question mark. which has been copied twice by RTD. Yeah, I was going to say, that's also been copied twice by Russell, hasn't it? Yeah, so the Master's Ring at the end of End of Time gets picked up, and then the, what's his name?

Doogie Howser when he died. Neil Patrick Harris. Something of his is picked up and taken away again. Yes. Doogie Howser MD's ring is...

Picked up. I'm Russell T Davies. Yeah. Anyway, so just to finish up, this is honestly my last, my last bits now is that I noticed, so I was obviously very happy and I was writing my notes up, writing all of this up.

So the credits were rolling, and I noticed that there's a lot of single-named female actresses in this film. Amazing. Which made me feel... You don't get those anymore, do you? You don't. It's like Sahara. Oh, right. No, I just thought that lots of them had just been human trafficked. stage names I don't know I think they all came from string fellows I imagine welcome to the pole with Sahara exactly there's that sort of vibe

And then the one setting of the cast, as it comes up, it just says dwarves. And what I thought is it was a different time. You wouldn't be allowed to do that now at the end. Well, it's quite, actually, it's quite a, you could say that some characters are implied homosexuals. You've got a very mixed kind of set of races in the film, haven't you? Yes. Dressing us like tribes people.

For its time, I think it's actually quite a quality. You've got Hulkman, Treeman. It's more than Star Wars, the first Star Wars. Yes, yeah, yeah. I think it's quite interesting for its time in that way. I agree.

And then my final note is that as we got right to the end of the credits, Ross said in the scripts at the start, it says all the places where it's filmed. It's filmed in Elstree and all of that. But it then also said... filmed at brooklyn's industrial estate waybridge and i was like it's industrial estate as in the motor racing track yes john oh no way and then that made me realize that

Dear listener, I once attended a wedding of my good friend from university, Charlotte. Her friend got married and got married. on one of the decommissioned Concords. Ooh! But, and if you look at it on Google Maps, dear listener, you can see the Concord on Google Maps where they got married. However...

More people turned up for the wedding that they were anticipating. And I was literally too tall for Concord. So I couldn't actually watch the ceremony. I had to watch it being live streamed on an iPad that was on somebody's wheelchair underneath. The glamour. Yes. And where we stayed, the hotel. Did they have a permanently affixed? It was not permanently affixed. It was, it was, it made, it was.

Really hot that day. Temporary iPad. Yes, on a wheelchair. And then where we stayed, the hotel that's attached to Brooklands is right next door. to where they, from where it says, according to Google Maps, where this industrial estate is. I was like, I've stayed somewhere that was meters away from where they filmed Flash Gordon. That's amazing. So there you go. Yeah.

Very good indeed. Great. And it made me very happy. But then also I was like, oh, if only I would have known. I would have gone and sort of taken more of a pilgrimage. Yeah, more of a pilgrimage. Long live Flash. You've saved your life.

Great. So what do we think of Flash Gordon? Go on. You two go first. Tremendously enjoyable. Yes. I thought I wouldn't be able to watch it. I thought it might be a bit of an extra type vibe. And it teeters on that edge. Sometimes. But I think at every point it kind of, it's salvaged by... more knowing hands than the hands that touched extra yeah yes as in probably like a hundred times the budget as well yes but it's still yeah so i would say

I probably didn't enjoy it as much as The Omen, but I was pretty close to... And what did I give The Omen, Cleaves? Probably five, I imagine. As a big budget, you know. kind of block, 70s, 80s blockbuster. You gave The Amen a five. Did I? Yeah. So I give this a four, I think. Oh. Because I think I... With a more charismatic lead, I think it could be a great film. And you can enjoy it because that guy is so bad. Because he just can't act and he's hopeless.

And I think someone... So Kurt Russell or Arnie, because those were two of the people who were up for it. Arnie, I think, would have been great. Well, I think both of them would have been great. But I think Arnie is good at that kind of humour, isn't he? But they would have dubbed his voice, but they completely... Yes. Like they did in Hercules Goes to New York. I think potentially it would have been too early in Arnie's career.

Because it would have been like three or four years before he shot Terminator. I can't remember when Conan the Barbarian came out. Was it before this or after this? He would have been enormous at that point as well. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I can't think of someone else that would have... 1982. Oh, okay. Let's try and... Can we think of someone else who would have been an American star?

Someone like Elliot Gould. Imagine Elliot Gould in it. He wouldn't have played an American football star. Shut up. Shut up. Christ. 1980s Shatner. The old action hero. Yeah. Yeah, I'd love to see someone... Ah, I can't really... Let's have a look. It's really hard to think, isn't it? Who... American... Action. Treat Williams? Yeah, like a comedy action. 1980. Someone like Lee Majors, but he might have been too old. Too old. Sly? Too short.

Way too short. Chuck Norridge. Chuck Norris. Norridge. Chuck Norridge. You know him, don't you? He works on Spa. Steven Seagal? No. Seagal? No. Bruce Willis? He wasn't famous enough. He wasn't famous enough, but I think he would have been quite good if they'd done it later, yeah. Kurt Russell, we got Mel Gibson, but he was Australian. Alien. And mentally insane. Yeah. Rowdy Roddy Piper.

Who's that? Is he a wrestler? He's in They Live. They Live. Oh, right. Patrick Swayze. Swayze would have been a shout, but he wasn't big enough at that point. Charles Jean. Sheen was at the start. Shelly Sheen wasn't famous until the mid-1980s. It's really hard to think of someone, and maybe that's the problem.

Maybe that's the problem they had, because obviously with Superman, they went with an unknown, didn't they? So maybe at that point, they were all like, can't fucking think of anyone, which is quite interesting. Young leading men. Yeah, you know. Mark Hamill was unknown in Star Wars. Dirk Benedict, yeah. Harrison Ford was quite unknown in Star Wars.

So it's interesting to think. Yeah. But obviously this guy shot himself in the foot because a sequel is massively hinted at, isn't it? And it's like, you don't see them go home. Yeah. You don't, I mean, and then you see obviously Ming picking up his own ring. Yeah. I don't know why it's funny. Surely it would have been like a Crocodile D2 sort of thing where the people from Mongo come to...

come to Earth and they're like fish out of water sort of thing. What's it called? Galactica 80 is it called? Yes. Yes. Or voyage home. Yes. Blind motorbikes for everybody. Double dumbass on you. What does he say? I can't remember what he says. Yeah, you're right. And a double dumbass on you. But he doesn't say anything else after, does he? No.

Oh, amazing. What a film. Yeah. Might have to watch that now. Okay. Cleaver, you didn't give your score? Your score. It was a two, but I put it up to a three. Oh, what? Because I'd never seen it before, so I didn't have any of the nostalgia that you guys had. Fair enough, fair enough. And the more I watch it, because it just seemed... Terrible. Yeah, when I first watched it, but the more I watched it, the more... It's an enjoyable romp. It's the sort of thing...

Right. When I try and get back, I got back to watch Highlander. She never saw it before. She thought it was shit. She refuses to watch Rocky Horror books for what she's seen. She said, it looks shit. I think this is a cult film on a similar level to Rocky Horror. I would agree. I remember working in MVC. uh in the year 2000 with paul skirm a friend of this parish yes he could have played and yeah yes and i remember him saying all the time

freeze your bloody bastards. And I didn't know what it was from. I had no idea. So it's only 25 years later that I'm like, well, well, well, he's quoting from Flash Gordon. Because he used to do Gordon's Alive. Gordon's Alive! Someone at work today kept quoting lines out of Hannibal. Okay. I've seen it once.

I'm not getting any of these references. No, no, no. Is that anyone from your serial killer? I was going to say your serial killer club. No, it's just a ghost. Just the guy in the cell. I'm giving it a four.

Because obviously, dear listeners, you can tell, first film I ever saw in the cinema, and this movie really made me love films. I'm aware, as you've heard over the last couple of hours, there's some big old holes in it. And there's most certainly... some acting that is, yeah, you know, not fantastic, but it is a camp, I would say, as John says, like Rocky Horror, it is a camp classic.

I enjoy watching it once a year. I'll stick it on. I continue to enjoy it. And I would always say to people, if you haven't seen it, you should see it. It should definitely be a Christmas film, shouldn't it? Yes. It was always on at Christmas. It should be up there with Die Hard, Santa Claus the movie, the David Lean Great Expectations. You always want that to be on. And this is a great Christmas film, I think. So, yep. Never ending story. Octopussy. Octopussy. That'll keep him in curry.

Right, so let's see what our listeners thought of it, James. Oh, yeah. Listeners? Is this all you sat on the toilet writing this? Yeah.

oh god i've eaten too much curry uh before we get into your comments if you're not already following us we are on blue sky at at general witch and on instagram at at general which one that's where we ask questions like this one away we ask what you thought flashical museum haunter said they were completely obsessed with it loving it as a kid and now for its count value

Yes, whoever you are, I agree 100% on that one. Aaron Film shared a memory from 1980 working as a cinema rusher at the ABC Windsor. Wow. They used to sit at the back and watch up to 600 people laugh and cheer multiple times. Good God. Was Prince Andrew there? Yes, good sir. Alexandra Goddard pointed out the obvious selling point. It has Peter Wingard. I mean, that's enough, isn't it?

Bring me the ball worms. Yes. You never saw what a ball worm was. Well, it's, it's, um, it's the thing that I've brought the car. And dance wardrobe, a man after my own heart or a person after my own heart went all in with, oh, only the greatest film ever made. Good, good, good, good.

Cats and Cucumbers said the film always makes them think of Brian Blessed's Gordons alive. And Blue Peter's Peter Duncan putting his hand in that tree. It used to scare the pants off me. Yes, as we've said, this film is certainly horror-coded.

Fraser Gregory called it their favourite film of all time. Wow. Oh, I'm so pleased it's not just me, you people. Thank you. This is making me feel warm inside. An absolute blast, full blast of colourful, memorable characters and a killer score by Queen. Yes.

Mark Jones described it as stupendous, great performances, looks amazing, fabulous soundtracks, endlessly quotable, campers tits, what's not to love? Although he wasn't too sure about the pervy father-daughter bits or Flash's leather budgie smugglers. previously discussed on the other episode, yes. CJ Loves Horror simply said, second best movie ever scored by Queen. Yes, once again we said there, Highlander stuff is great too. Father Karas took the opposite view, utterly abysmal.

Fine. Okay, Father Karras. Who said that? Father Karras. Who's in it? No, it's not Karras, is it? Meryn. Meryn, yeah. Karras is the other one. But that's fine. Oh! What's wrong with him? And the Lord Reverend Cole wrapped it up beautifully. Always a pleasure to watch. The production design is stunning. Costumes, makeup, sets are all over-the-top perfection. Not a guilty pleasure, just a pleasure. Yes, indeed, sir. Pretty resounding.

I'm pleased because I was worried that, you know, sometimes when we go off of our normal horror track, people are going like, but it's really nice to see that people, a good cross section of the listenership. is on board with this one. Excellent. Yes, we got our new magazines out. So you may or may not know, we do a zine. It looks like we're going to be doing it twice a year. We're on issue three now.

Issue one sold out. Issue two is almost sold out. And issue three is doing really well. It's on its way. It's on its way. So if you want to get hold of that, go to our website, generalwitchfinders.com and grab that. It's full of... short stories articles art and photography and uh it's a really awesome uh collection of felt monsters in this one as well it's and it's it's not just us that's the other thing we should point out there's loads of other people lots of really brilliant contributors uh

I'll put our quick stuff in so it's not just us swaddling on. I got mine yesterday through the post-Cleaves and I have to say I think it's the best issue so far. It's getting better each night. It's much more varied. There's loads of interesting stuff in there.

Some really good photography. The guy with the infrared photography, I think, is great. The felt creatures are great. Something else did catch. Or some really mad drawings of, like, Henry VIII. Yes, they're really good, aren't they? They're insanely good. And I was just a bit like, oh, they're like way too good. It's Chloe Cumming, her name is. I saw her on social and I asked, would you like to put stuff in? And she said, yes. And then she said, oh, did you go on my website?

Hang on. And to try and contact me. I said, yeah, but your form wasn't working. She said, are you in Dorchester? Yeah. And turns out her mum lives on the corner of our road. And that's where she grew up. Wow. No way. Yeah, it's just mad, isn't it? Things are so weird, aren't they? Yeah, but yeah, it's brilliant. Really good stuff. It's all down to the contributors. It's all down to the contributors.

Yeah, we'll be doing another one next year. So again, follow us on social media to see if you are an artist or a writer and want to get involved. Follow us and there'll be a submission. Post coming up soon. Yes. But please, just to say, don't send any more letters to Ross written in your own blood. We've had to pass those on to environmental health and it's pretty upsetting. Just wanted to put that out there. We got anything? Yes.

So, you can... James has already given us his review of... I know what you saw. You what? Oh, Danny Robbins. Yeah, yeah. When did he do that? He did a very long voice note. Oh, I haven't listened to it yet. No, no, Ross, just stick that. No, copy and paste that one in. Okay. Your call has been forwarded to an automatic voice message system. At the tone, please record your message. When you have finished recording, you may hang up or press one for more options.

Morning, gents. I didn't do a review last night because after I dropped my sisters back to the parental homestead and then got back here. A message coming in for me. by the time i got back here i was it was far too late and i was i was too tired okay so yeah my thoughts it's very good value for money um they were on stage for the best part of three hours Which, you know, that's that's Hamlet territory. That's it was really good. They do how they do it is it's very slickly done in the.

It's almost like six mini episodes. He's got six cases and he starts off by giving you a video introduction, which plays on the screens above him. And then as the video introduction then fades, um,

Evelyn and the guy in his name escapes me right now, you know, the team skeptic, they're then back on stage. They kind of go on and off of stage. So it's almost kind of like, you know, when you're watching it on TV and it cuts from... the you know the vt package to them in the pub it kind of gives you that feeling and that vibe um they split up the cases with have you got any questions or answers for us at the um sort of

one third of the way through, I would say, after the second case, which was middling. I think you're kind of stuck with whatever the general public. ask really the best one oh it's kieran o'keefe kieran is that is the skeptic isn't it um the best bit was me uh and My sister's laughing at a guy who has felt the guilt and the responsibility for the death of Mark Boland.

for the best part of 40 years and you can see kieran o'keefe on stage putting his hand in front of his mouth trying not to laugh because this guy just said And I watched him, I was watching him on the TV show Magpie. Any of you that can remember the show Magpie. And on that show was Mark Bolan. And I looked at him on the screen and I thought.

He's not long for this world. He's going to die soon. And literally one week later, he died. His mini, he went into that pole and he died. And I've carried that with me all these years. I've carried it with me. Have you ever heard of anything like this before? And then amazingly, of course, even...

You know, I will say this. I'll get onto Evelyn properly in a second. But I will say this is that even though she's supposed to be team believer, she's very, very level headed in what she says. And both of them just said, look, when you do things.

like this it seems weird but you have to consider how many people are looking at a celebrity at any one point and if just one of them thinks oh i think he's going to die next week and they do uh if you've got seven million people looking at one person you chances are one of them's going to make an accurate prediction about them if they all make seven million different predictions

And so they said, no, no, no, you know, there's nothing weird in that. So that was the funniest bit. There was just kind of like two stories of, you know, we think our house might be haunted. And a girl saying that she felt, you know, like something touching her back. And when she woke up in the morning, she had like scratch marks on her. And once again, even Evelyn Hollow was like.

it's really really common for us to scratch ourselves in the middle of the night and when we're in or you know sort of mark ourselves and you know you can wake up in the morning with a bruise and you don't know how you've done it That's not really evidence. But the telling bit, and I looked at my sisters, was they said, oh, we felt that there might be something near us. So we all got together and we had a prayer together. And I was just like, here we go. That's why.

But yeah, so what you really get is you get kind of like six mini episodes of Uncanny, very slickly done in terms of whoever's. sort of doing the VT behind the, behind the, the stage that sort of like, as Danny finishes sort of talking and, you know, he's reading without scripts. like actors would do. And that sort of, as he finishes his preamble, you know, the, you know, the VT starts up, it's all very, there wasn't a lot of sort of like hanging around.

My ex-girlfriend Ellie was there with a friend of hers last night. She's massive. She's sort of like an uncanny Uber fan. And she said, oh, this is this is way slicker than the last time they did it. They were like, oh, last time they just had like a shed on stage. So, you know, I feel like we got really, really good value for money out of the show.

onto the Evelyn Hollow experience. You'll be delighted to know that I did not embarrass myself. My entire interaction with her lasted... oh i don't know about 30 45 seconds kat in camera like we've got to get a picture and i said i hate having my pictures out no no no no no and they went come on you've got to do it you've got to do it um but i said if we're doing it i'm standing behind her um she signed my book

And they all signed. I got a copy of Into the Uncanny and I got them all to sign it. So that was nice. And so, yeah, bearing in mind that we got there for sort of 6.15 for the signing at the start. had a drink after the signing. And then, you know, you obviously like the show itself, you think, cool, 6.15 to 10.30. That was good value. That was a proper value night out. So respect you to Danny Robbins. He said that they've got another series of the audio.

they've got a new audio uncanny um starting up he said in time for halloween uh so yes there you go there's there's my thoughts on on uncanny I enjoyed it. It wasn't really that scary. There was nothing in it that was scary or spooky. I remain team sceptic. I hope both of you, I look forward to hearing more about Frankenstein from Ross. Oh, another email for me. And yeah, there you go. There you guys go. Look forward to speaking to you both later on. Ah, yes.

So did you, you got to meet, what's her name, James? I did, I did get to meet her. In person. I've met her. What is her name? That's awful, I've forgotten her name. Evelyn Hollow. Evelyn Hollow. She signed my book. What book did you take for it to sign, James? So this is her book, Atlas of Paranormal Places. Oh, cool. Oh, it's her book? Yeah. Oh, I had no idea she had a book. That's amazing. Oh, excellent.

Were you bothered about the other two or did you just go straight to the other two? I spoke to them. I spoke to them. It's great. Thanks for Danny. Cheers, lads. Cheers, Kieran. Cheers, Kieran. Nice. It's good because I had my two sisters with me. So they kind of went to the other two and then I went straight to Evelyn Harlow. But then I got Danny Robinson also because I didn't want to just go, I have just come to talk to Evelyn Harlow. So I have, I did pick up a copy of...

the Uncanny book, and I got all three of them to sign that. Oh, nice. I didn't know there was such a thing. Yes, it's called Into the Uncanny. Oh, okay.

I think it's coming back soon on the radio, isn't it? Yes, that's what he said. He said there's a new series coming, a new radio series coming. Because I really like the TV, but I think the TV is obviously much more. difficult and takes a lot longer to make than a radio thing the other um the my horrific something horrific this week uh is not very horrific but i think our listeners will probably enjoy it it is um

Daisy and Charlie Cooper. Ah, yes. Doing the name of a programme which totally escapes me on BBC Two. I think it's BBC Two. It might be BBC Four. So they are the stars of TV's This Country, which I, myself and my partner Helen Martin are super fans of. So he did Myth Country, Daisy May Cooper and Charlie, Daisy May and Charlie Cooper's Night Watch.

That's what it's called. So they did Myth Country. He did Myth Country. She was in a few bits of it. That was a lot of fun and a kind of quasi-realistic documentary about... folklore in Britain. But then this is them doing a kind of Help My House Is Haunted forward slash ghost adventures kind of staying in a place. There's absolutely no horror whatsoever, but it is quite heartwarming and quite enjoyable to see them hanging out as brother and sister and having a bit of a laugh.

she's doing fake tan in a prison so basically the first episode they stay in Gloucester prison um and it's I mean it's It's a fun way to spend half an hour in their company. So I would heartily recommend that. I think all the episodes are on the iPlayer now. It's not horrific at all. They might swear a few times. If you're worried about watching things with your gran that you think aren't going to be particularly scary, they probably do swear. But otherwise, I think it's...

It's a lot of fun. It's very much in the same vein as Bob and Paul's fishing programme, where you don't really need to know about fishing to enjoy spending half an hour in their company. And so, yeah, it's that kind of vibe. What are you getting out, Cleves? Your anusol? Ross is unzipping something. Oh, he's got his... PKE meter. PKE meter. Is it picking up anything in your cupboard?

It's picking up you, but that's because you're on a computer. Yes, and your microphone. Yeah. Nothing in the cupboard behind me. Okay. So yeah, that's my something horrific. Any other horrific things happening? I went and saw Frankenstein at the cinema. Oh yes! That was good. I always get the Dal Toros mixed up, James. Which one is it? Guillermo del Toro's Frankenstein with, what's his name? That guy, the wooden, very wooden actor. What's his name? Oscar Isaac. Oscar Isaac's playing...

the Baron. Um, I would say, uh, I really enjoyed it. I felt like, um, it's the, the first sort of like visually iconic, um, version of Frankenstein since the James Wells versions of it. There's some imagery in there, which is just, it's amazing. And it felt to me like, um, how, uh,

when Bram Stoker's Dracula came out, um, how like someone is just kind of, I'm going to do, I'm going to do my own version of it. I'm not going to hop back to anything which has gone before. Um, and it's just, the colors are amazing and it's just so much detail. It's like when. When the monster gets shot at one point, the balls are going in and you can see the material where the balls have gone through are smouldering a little bit. It's the amount of detail in the effects in it.

Amazing. So it looks great. The guy who plays the monster is really, really good. Jacob Elordi. Yes. It was going to be Andrew Garfield, wasn't it? That's right. At the last minute. Yes. It's... It's split up into sort of three parts. The captain on the ship, the baron, and then the creature. Apparently he originally wanted to do it as three films, but it's not. And I think it should have been three films because it's...

I feel like the captain's bit is completely rushed. And then I felt like the creature's bit just ends really quickly at the end. My only criticism would be that it finishes too quickly. But also... It just feels like some of the changes they make, because it's a very, very faithful adaptation of the book, but some of the changes they put in, it just feels like, why have you moved out to Edinburgh rather than Geneva?

And I just don't understand why you made a change. And also, I like the idea of him being a young student doing it, but they've aged everyone up, which I wasn't. that keen on. But apart from that, yeah, Oscar Isaacs, John, I don't know. I don't see him as the Baron, really. No, terrible. But he was still good. And also, what's her name? Maya Goth. She had the hard part of being the only pretty much woman in it. But again, that is quite faithful to the book, isn't it?

Really, really worth looking at. But I was just thinking, oh, this looks so great, but it looks really familiar. And then I found out that it was really heavily based on a comic book adaptation of... which has been reissued soon. I can't remember the name of the artist. Is it Mike Allred or Mike Mignola? No, not Mignola. It's another one. I'm not sure what the name of the artist is. Bernie Wrightson?

Is it that Bernie Wrightson one? Is it better than Mary Shelley's Frankenstein, please? Yeah, much, much better. Yeah. Let's have a look one second. I remember getting that on VHS out from our village shop in 1995. And just thinking, what on earth is this rubbish meant to be about? Like Robert De Niro in a big vat full of womb fluid. A big cloud come in and electrocuting. It's just crap, wasn't it? The effects are awful. I did. That was the.

thing for prefixes at the time wasn't it it was like Bram Stoker's Dracula Mary Shelley's Frankenstein it's like I'd rather have Just Frankenstein based on this. Or the curse of Frankenstein. Yeah, Bernie Ritenson. Bernie Ritenson. Bernie Winters. Mike and Bernie Winters. And Snorbits. Snorbits as the creature. But it has got... The first doctor in it as the blind man. William Hartnell. The new one. What's his name? David. David. David. David. David, it's over to you.

I can't remember his name. Bradley, David Bradley. David Bradley, yeah. Oh, yeah, that's good. Yeah, so it's going to be on Netflix in a couple of days, so I really recommend watching it. But if you can see it at the cinema, it's worth watching. Nice. It's on Netflix already. Yeah. It's a Netflix, but it'd be like...

13 quid or something is it or is that free no it's free because it was a Netflix film and then they gave it a I think in order to get it eligible for Oscars it needed to be oh Oscars Isaacs yeah yeah he was the worst in the three new Star Wars, wasn't he? You forget he's even in it. And you forget what he's meant to be doing. He was meant to die, wasn't he?

Well, yeah, I was about to say, well, I will defend it by saying he is absolutely superb inside Llewellyn Davis. Oh, is he? He's brilliant in that. He's absolutely fantastic. Oh, yes. Ex Machina. Yeah, he's great in that as well. Ex Machina. He's very good in that. He's in that, is he? Yeah, he's very good in that. I would also, and Ross is absolutely right, I think it struggles from the fact that he was designed to be, and it was...

It's supposed to be like, you were supposed to think, oh, here's the new hero of the new film. And then they were going to kill him off, thus doing some sort of bait and switch. But after, as it was going into production, it was decided, no, don't kill him off. Keep him around. So he just kind of hangs around. It really, he doesn't really have a smile. Yeah. He has more of an arc in the last Jedi, but that's a podcast for another time. Yeah.

Okay, so. What are we doing next time? Next time. We will be watching. Next time. Psychomania. Whoa. Back to horror. With Beryl Reid. Yeah, with Beryl Reid, yes. Yeah. Of TV's Beryl Reid. Yeah. The motorbikes, I think they're ghost of zombie motorbikers. They jump out of a grave. I've never seen this, but I know motorbike zombies jump out of a grave. I'm looking forward to it. It sounds fucking mental. We'll be returning.

to horror yes this november with psychomania well thank you for listening to two parts of um we appreciate it and thank you for your patience yes and Just to remind you, we are a horror podcast and we will be back with some horror in our next episode with Psychomania 2. Until then, happy day. Love, light and peace. Thanks for listening, everyone. Stay safe. been listening to the general witch finders support the show and continue the conversation

at Patreon.com forward slash General Witch Finders. Subscribe and spread the word at GeneralWitchFinders.com Farewell. You don't have nightmares. Hey, this is Jonathan Fields, host of the Good Life Project podcast. Boost Mobile reminds me of what I love, when someone reimagines what's possible. Offering reliable nationwide coverage backed by a 30-day money-back guarantee.

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Someone just contacted me to say that they, oh, glad you're doing it. I just listened to the whole lot again this week at work. The whole lot? Yeah. All the way through. Imagine. Imagine. We should send a person like that something just to say thank you. But it's also insane, isn't it? Yeah. They said he's been laughing so much at work.

He's going to lose his job. Where does he work? I don't know. Oh, my God. The high court. So how many hours is that in total, do we think? Well, it's 62 episodes. They're roughly an hour and a half each. Yeah. 63 and 90 hours. It's like 90 hours. Yeah. Nearly a hundred hours probably. God. Wow. What an absolute hero.

Because I started trying to re-listen to all of the M.R. James podcast. Yeah, rather than listen to any of ours. Yeah, why would I listen to myself? And then I only got to like episode three and I thought I can remember all this. But they still haven't released another episode. Well, MIJ hasn't written anything for a while, hasn't it? No, but they got to episode 99, and then they've not done anything since December last year. Maybe they're a massive falling out. It's really annoying.

Because they left it on the cliffhanger of, oh, we're going to give you our thoughts next episode of Mark Gatiss's Women of Stone. And then maybe that was so bad that they just thought we're not going to review it or do another episode. So what do we think of the new one coming up? I'm looking forward to it immensely because that's a really good story. And I don't think he can fuck it up.

So what is the story? A man goes on, a man suffers from recurring dreams of a painting in a castle in a roomy sleeping in. And then one day he's invited to a castle and it turns out it's the castle in his dreams. Is it Benson? Is it... E.F. Benson, yeah. But it turns out that it's basically a vampire story. I think there's a vampire living in the painting in his room. Okay.

That would be my reading of it, that the vampire comes out of the painting at night. John, was there a short story, was it M.R. James, where the guy can see the... Like the light from a room which is next door, which isn't next door. Yes. Reflecting onto the wall. What was that? Number 13. Is that what it's called? Yeah, that's one of my favourite ones. It's a brilliant story. And they did a version of that.

on telly, which wasn't that great. Around the same time, they did the same version of A View from a Hill. Yes. I think they did two, like 2006 or 2007, something like that. And then they didn't continue them. And I think the guy that directed those and wrote those has now got a bit of a chip on his shoulder that Mark Gatiss took it over.

Because I enjoyed all of Mark's ones except the last one, which I thought he demitted the scary part from it, which is where the knights come into the cottage and kill the woman, which is just like... why do a scary thing and then omit the scary scene? Because the rest of it isn't scary at all. It's just like this quite weak lady who lives with her husband and he makes lots of excuses for how kind of...

how kind of withered and weak she is to people. But then obviously Gatiss changed the subject, the subtext to be this kind of thing about battered wives. coercive control and stuff. Yeah. I watched The Birds last night with the kids. Oh, amazing. I haven't seen that since I was a kid.

Yes. They kept their attention. They kept moaning at the beginning. Nothing's happening. This woman's mad. What is this woman doing? Why is she doing this? The star is mad. She's not going to fall in love. Why would he fall in love? They've only just met. Yeah. But then when the birds started and they were like, you know, the famous bit when they all start landing on the thing behind her, Talith was like, oh no. That's like hiding behind the end. Amazing. But they were like, why?

Why are they all so silent? I said, there must be, there must have been like a thing that they weren't, it was too scary for them to scream or something. There's so much of people being attacked by birds and they're just going, ha, ha, ha. Yeah. Well, you would be screaming your head off. Yeah, I would be. I'd be yelling. The start is mental because it bears no relation to the...

original story whatsoever which is amazing and is set somewhere like Dorset or Cornwall or somewhere. Then it just stops and the film just stops as well and they go is that it? I was thinking I think it's gone wrong. Where they start driving out and it's just the bird noises. And you never find out why it happened. No.

Well, it's the same with the short story. You'd never find out why it's happening. But what's something to do with the birds she had with her, though, in the story? That's what they make out in the film. In the story, there is no reason. And the story finishes in the same way. They're kind of hunkered down in the house and then it's just like the end. They really hated the old woman who kept denying that this could be happening. Yes.

So I'm going to share The Mist next. Oh, yeah. That's a good one, isn't it? I enjoyed that a lot. Me too. That's really good. That's not M. Night, Chalamet, M. Night. No, it's Frank Darabon. Oh, okay, yeah. Because he got Walking Dead off the back of it, didn't he? Ah, right, okay. Yeah, that's a really good film. Yeah, really good cast. They work really well together in that, don't they? Yeah. Cool. All right, well, that's an extra bit of...

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