Swamp Watch

This is Gary and Shannon and you're listening to KFI A M six forty, the Gary and Shannon Show on demand on the iHeartRadio app.

We asked you, what is that smell?

LA Times did at least asking readers the sense that remind them of Los Angeles?

And I thought, why.

Would you open up such a Pandora's box of what is certain to be all nakeadive a lot of negative, but they stuck with the positive. The first example they gave was magnificent magnolias and wistful with steria.

I mean, right, there are scents and aromas that remind me of spring.

I've never walked through LA and been like, smell those flowers.

The neighbors and the neighbors. Yeah, the neighbor's honeysuckle. Sure, But then once I leave my backyard, I don't smell that.

You're also outside of LA as well, So you want smell honeysuckle at third in spring?

I don't. Nature park right across the street. All you smell is nothing.

You you go hard against the Burbank Nature Park?

What is it with that nature park? What do you have against it? It's just such a fiasco. Who in the fiasco who in Burbank City Hall was like, you know what, we need nature in the middle of this little triangle patch of land. We should not develop it. We shouldn't put anything on there. We shouldn't put it parking. Not even parking. We're just gonna have wood chips over what amounts to about a city block. So people don't

I'm sure you could go down to the Burbank City Council and say, hey, I'd like to be the steward of.

The Burbank Nature Park. I want to be a docent, I want to lead tours.

If you want to enact, if you want change, you should be a factor. You should be the change factor. Buffalo Bill's quarterback Josh Allen won the MVP last night.

For him. Good for him. I saw the meme going around that you should get someone to look at you the way Hayley Steinfeld looks at Josh Allen and it's this beautiful, adoringce. She's they're they're engaged, looks at each other like that. They know. The cameras are on, the lights are on, they're all beautiful. But the response is everybody who's a Bills fan looks at Josh Allen. There's that too. It's Josh Allen exactly. Your wife looks at

Got the real problem is that our leaders are done.

The other side never quits. I'm not going anywhere, so the squad I can imagine what can be and be unburdened by what has been.

You know, amans have always been gone at President, they're not scrupid.

A political plunder is when a politician actually tells the truth. Have the people voted for you with not swamp watch. They're all count of knowing. This, I think is arguably the most important executive order that President Trump has talked about in the last two weeks. He wrote on truth Social Today that he's planning to sign an executive order to promote plastic straws after Joe Biden tried to phase

He's like, and what's with these paper straws. One day I'm going to become president and I'm gonna make us have plastic. It is true.

I do. I do miss the plastic straws.

When I do have a paper straw, I don't like that it disintegrates. I don't like that I feel like I've got to be careful using it.

It forces me to drink my bad, my bad drink faster. You're bad drink. I mean, I'm trying to think of the times that I have a juice or something. I don't have it in juice. I have a drink when I'm going through a drive through, let's say a drive shake. You sure, And I got known to put down a milkshake, and I got a pound of milkshake that much faster before my paper straw tocintegratees and you got.

To get to a toilet because that's a lot of dairy I have.

I have a problem with dairy the old shoes. Do you have a problem with dairy? No, you know you can age out a dairy. That was one of the things that one of our callers said earlier this week is there comes a time in a boy's life when dairy doesn't agree with you anymore interesting. I think you just get out of the habit of I don't drink milk, so, I mean, I'm a big cheese fan, but I'm not a milk person, So I guess there. I don't know what if I had a big, nice glass of milk.

It's not.

But I'm going through like I'm gonna make a dip for your party, and too many recipes have cream cheese, and I think that's a blasphemy. I don't think that's right.

I like a good onion dip, just a sour cream, an onion and good night Irene.

See hello plumbing. I was my sister in law got some.

She said I had a craving for onion dip and we were watching football games over on the holidays. I hadn't had onion dip in a very long time.

I think onion dips and cheeseballs are kind of things of the past that should never have been things of the past. They should never have gone away.

I attacked that it did not know what is coming.

President. President Trump is meeting with Japanese Prime Minister Shagero Ishiba. They will be actually holding a joint news conference here in a few minutes at the White House. The podiums are all set up, reporters are in the room. Japan's Prime minister, they say, is looking to get personal connection with Trump and to get some reassurance that Japan won't be hit with the tariffs that we've seen other countries hit with or abandon the security guarantees that we have.

He's getting ready for Dodger baseball. He's getting ready for the next season of writer football, I mean.

Sho hey and catchers. He counts. Report that new guy, the other new guy.

The other new guy. You know, got a lot going on, write Tim Kates.

And then the other big, the other big headline out of DC is almost all of the US Agency for International Development employees are going to be off the job. Employee associations, the unions trying to go to federal courts to roll back this swift dismantling of us AID and much of a bunch of its programs worldwide. All right, how about we adopt a family? Coming up, We're going to adopt a family on Facebook. Okay, we'll explain. Wait, we're going to like, we're not going to Oh, I

You're listening to Gary and Shannon on demand from KFI AM six forty as.

Yeah, yes, somebody's talking about your Valentine's Day, right.

Shannon's monologue about Valentine's Day does not make her sound like a terrible person at all. She is a breath of fresh air. However, she had to go on and on because she is a woman. Everybody expects a woman who says, don't get me anything to be setting a trap.

No, it's not.

She had to go on a little bit about it, so we didn't think that.

Yeah, no, no, no, I really really don't. I it is not a trap. I'm too old for traps. Traps are what I would have done twenty years ago.

That's a mind thing, right, eight out of that? Come on, what so you don't have anything planned for Valentine's Day? Like there's you know the card. Yeah, I'll get a card. You should say Happy Valentine's Day. I'll write something nice in there. You get chatchypet to put something in there for you, something creative.

No, I'm a very good writer. I can express my my feelings. That's fine, Okay, I wrote you a nice birthday card. Once I wrote you guys a nice wedding card. Oh really, yeah, where is that?

Well? Maybe i'll give you this weekend. We have a chance for you to win one thousand dollars. Here's how you pick it up.

Now your chance to win one thousand dollars. Just enter this nationwide keyword on our website. Credit that's credit C R E. D I T. Editor now at KFI AM six forty dot com. Slash cash Howard by Sweet James Accident Attorneys. If you're hurting an accident. Winning is everything, call the winning attorneys at Sweet James one eight hundred nine million. That's one eight hundred nine million or sweet James dot com.

Keyword goes on the website. Will do it again an hour from now. Give you a chance to win a thousand bucks. Would you like your Jeopardy question? That's a great idea. Let me turn this thing on.

You don't need to say everything's a great idea. I just took a motren. I'll be fine for four more hours.

Okay, what's my pin? I like balls one two three? Ah? There, you're right.

Alliteration on the map on the map. Excuse me for a nap for twelve hundred dollars, with dense traffic and no lights, an intersection at Mescal Square can be a mess in this capital of Ethiopia.

Oh oh, what is addis Ababa? Holyes, are you serious right now? You heard me? You heard me? How do you know that? Because it's the capital of Ethiopia and it's alliteration. So I got to think of two words that start with the same letter color me impressed my theory. He looks at them before? How am I look at it? You are the ones who have control of them? You you know the chain of customers to see here before I do. Yeah, but Keana, he's such a rule follower.

Okay, so, but that's not something that would come up in a show that you would have ready to go in your brain. You must have had prior exposure to oh something, you must know something. At some point, You learned something.

At some point there was learning. You knew that before you heard it in the agency. I don't know if I I did know it before I heard it in the agency, but because it was more recent, it it it was moved.

Don't don't make it move to the front of your don't don't denigrate your intelligence. That's a very impressive thing to know, and I am impressed.

So good for you. Yeah, but you guys still don't I believe that you knew that. And I'm a half week and a cheater. Well you'll have to deal with that in another day. How do I How do I adopt a family on Facebook?

Oh?

Right, it's just I just pick people and say you're adopted. Now, let's see here to do? This is quite the lengthy article. How do I get to where I adopt a family?

Did you know twenty seven percent of American adults have cut off contact with a family member.

Yet, you know what, we've actually talked about that bookre we have, uh and it it at times worries me for humanity and at other times at the I guess at this on the flip side of that, I am very, very lucky to have the family that I have.

Well, there is a Facebook group and it's called Surrogate Grandparents USA. It's a place where older and younger Americans can connect over a mute need for family, they say. Many of the posts read like tiny, tragic personal ads.

Here are a few.

We want grandparents who want to have pizza nights with us, attend baseball and basketball games, have ice cream dates, take bike rides, just generally have fun with us and our boys. Here's another one. My children need more than just me to love them. I can't be their mama, daddy, aunt, uncle, grandma, and grandpa forever. We joke about it, but it's true, and it sits as a pit in my stomach. Here's

Now.

Some members of the group of Lost loved Ones, some have never had families of their own. But they say it's like a refuge for the estranged, and it's not just a growing problem in the US, but worldwide. The sounds like be careful sounds That's what I'm reading. As much as I want to say, this is wonderful for people who seek connection and a familial connection in that way.

Just be careful. I would I think I would do this. I would totally do it. I mean if I don't know if anybody likes us, that's the but I think my wife and I have plenty of goodness. You're also going to have grandkids in like two years, three years, you know what? On second thought, you're not coming over on So your kids are in child bearing birthing ages. Birth My son at twenty five is not in a birthing age. I think your daughter's gonna wait for a while. Probably, Yes,

But you know, we should get at some goats. She's get a family of goats. Those are kids, right right?

Smart? You have the backyard. Are you a fan of Shakespeare? Some? Some it's some of it's pretty dark.

Yeah, I like the dark. I was just gonna say I like the dark stuff Shakespeare.

Some of the dramatic stuff is very very dark. This story pains me. The University of West England has issued trigger warnings for Shakespeare. We'll explain.

You're listening to Gary and Shannon on demand from KFI AM six forty.

Don't worry.

It is Friday, which means we've got a what you learned this week on the Gary and Shannon Show coming up in the mass of twelve o'clock hour, as well as the nine news nuggets you need to know. We use need very lightly and with regard to the nuggets, but stories that kind of fell through the cracks and we were covering the news during the week, but we want to make sure you're loaded with them as you move into your weekend.

Good morning, great show, But I'm calling BS on Gary's answer today, what is that Ethiopia?

I'm sure.

How watching I was watching he came up with it. It was crazy, adis a D D I S And then I think it's just a B A A. I think you got it though.

That's impressive, especially California public schools.

Very rare. Was the last class I attended was a Chico State class yeah, yeah, hey, don't knock it. Why not? This is our half hour of sissy talk.

People that can't handle the messages Starbucks as printing on their cups, people who are freaking out by a happy face or something like that. But we start with our sissy talk with this Shakespeare trigger warning. Beloney drama students now being warned of the suicide between Romeo and Juliet. There is a University of the West of England that has put more than two hundred trigger warnings on the works of Shakespeare. Warnings for I thought this was kind of funny.

As I was.

I've noticed these things coming up more and more when you watch a show that's streaming or you listen to a podcast or something like that, it's like, listen with care, like there's some dark themes coming up.

Listen with care, or.

You know, just so you know, this is gonna have scenes of violence and drug use and sex, to which I'm like, I wouldn't be watching it if it didn't have those things.

Now, the one I do understand is the like pulsating lights and things of that pleasure a lot that is a medical real thing. Those I've seen. I have seen those in move I think I saw it in The Avengers maybe something like that, which was the first time I had ever seen it in a big theater like that. But and we haven't done these trigger warnings. It feels like there was there was a high time for them,

We don't want you to freak out about that poor pig that lost its life or all the pigs that lose their lives when you think of ham We don't want you to hear this. We don't want you to think about the slaughter and the torture of animals.

Remember this, Remember the microaggressive chimps. We got a lot of s for that too. It's fine. The University of West England has issued warnings for Blood psychological wild in Macbeth. Some people don't like blood. We all bleed, Gary all, we all Scott's blood. They for the for the play the tempest, They warned of storms and extreme weather. No, no, I will no, no, I would not. I would never. I would never say that my daughter is afraid of trees.

Right.

That's very rare, very rare.

Okay for her, I can understand the warning. But for people to be have a trigger warning for weather, that's like, did.

You see the sign of the freeway? Did you encounter any of these signs yesterday and today? Severe weather? Severe weather weather?

Yeah, it was sprinkling yesterday, fairly today.

Yeah, uh, they said. Two hundred and twenty trigger warnings were added to Shakespeare's works and adaptations on stage and screen, which included depictions on the BBC and ITV. For Macbeth, for example, where the Scottish general overthrows the king by murdering him, there are warnings four murder, suicide, violence, knives and family trauma. Listen to this one.

The University of Nottingham placed warnings on Chaucer's Canterbury Tales over expressions of Christian faith ooh Jesus.

The same university banned the term Anglo Saxon from its module titles. Professors had to rename a Master's course in Viking in Anglo Saxon Studies to Viking and Early Medieval English Studies. It's because they wanted to decolonize the curriculum.

When is that meteor come saying that may or may not becoming super cool?

I think it's until like twenty thirty two December. In the Pirates of Penzance show that went up on the English National Opera Stage, theater goers were warned of Pirates, alcohol misuse. Oh for the love duty Dame Judy Dench legend when it comes to British theater, said theater goers who require warnings before performances like that, I should stay at home. Yeah exactly, Judy, exactly.

All right, Yeah, don't go to the theater, you know, just sit in your you know, your fluffy unicorn land corner.

And enjoy yourself.

I just what I did, ask Amy King, you're stressed like a Disney princess for the super Bowl party.

Because you need it. Well, she came to me and said, do you have a tiera? Why Shenon thought I should wear one, so I said, oh, I think Debora Mark should wear one too.

I don't.

I don't see you as a Disney I'm not. I see you more like not. Was it dirty? Okay? What do you What are you getting at, Shannon?

Well?

No, I just like we like I see Amy as this like like yeah, I'm not.

But you you know she would be the like Halloween night there.

Yeah, you'd be like sexy Disney princess.

Okay, okay, all right, so if you want to come as sexy, nobody needs to wear a costume. No costume. I didn't know it was a costume super Bowl party? Costume super Bowl party? Wait? Am I going to get in trouble for saying that? Why is there some sort of HR department? It's okay, I thought we fired them. Yeah, I'm not going to complain. One female co worker is sexier than the other female. I didn't say she was sexier. You wanted to see her dressed sexually? Why didn't take

I haven't touched the hard drugs. I've only had the motrin. I haven't touched the hard drugs they sent me home with.

And you thoughtgger warning. I wonder how much I could get for selling those. We're going to sell them, all right, Okay, sorry, but Starbucks, Starbucks and the messages that they're putting on their cups. Now, this is what we talk about. These off like I was gonna throw a fastball. You're like, no, no, no, we need something's lower than that.

You're listening to Gary and Shannon on demand from KFI AM six forty.

Recent plane crashes in close calls have people worried about the safety of flying. Of course, the mid air collision last week and near Washington, d C. Killed sixty seven people. That crash in Philadelphia. Now there's a missing plane in Alaska that they believe may have gone down. Also a plane that clipped a parked plane while it was taxiing at the Sea Tac Airport in Seattle, or near Seattle glowing review of Flight Risk.

By the way, my PSA ongoing PSA, the Mark Wahlberg movie that Mill gets and directed.

Do not believe it. It was an awful movie.

I thought it was a joke the whole time, that somebody was going to jump out and say, gotcha, you really didn't pay to see this stinking pile of crap masquerading a cinema.

Jeepers, jeepers. I don't think I've ever heard of jeepers before. Okay, okay. Under a new Starbucks policy, you customers are going to start seeing sharpy scrawled messages on the to go cups wishing them a great weekend. People are or simply saying something very skeptical. Enjoy these personalized notes, which they began rolling out in like January. I'm so it's amazing to me that this is a company wide policy. Hey, write something nice on the cup.

They've instructed employees to use their sharpie to write a simple affirmation such as you're amazing or hello again.

That's a little creepy. Is that creepy? Hey? Hot stuff? Is that what you want? I would like that?

No, but I mean you get a coffee cup and it says you're amazing.

I don't know. That's well, not everybody loves this idea.

Well, if you're a serial killer and you get a cup that says you're amazing, doesn't that mean you want You're going to go out and kill some more.

It's just I am amazing, affirming what you already believe about yourself, that humanity needs to be culled like a like a bird flu chicken population, right the jeepers. One other poster on TikTok said that the encouraging messages stopped feeling special once they realized everybody corporate policy.

So people were feeling special by their creepy messages. You really thought that they were writing that just for you.

I don't know.

The baristas have grown resentful towards these affirmations.

It slowed down the pace.

It comes off as a forced way to make connections with customers, to which I say, do you need a connection?

Maybe you just come up with an icon that is your thing, your you, barista Bob. You want to write a happy face, a happy face, or a star, a star that a heart with a B in it or something like that. Does that mean what a be? Like? The letter b or a beat. Name is bob Oh, I said, And.

That sounds like a Valentine to Bob Oh like love Bob, Love Like Hey, Shannon, here's your triple mocha. How about love Bob. Have a great day.

I don't know, have a fun day, Have a fun day, hope it picks up. Have a zippity dooda day. I think looks great. I don't care what anybody says.

If you're going to Starbucks for an affirmation, that's probably an issue.

Right, I mean, there's nothing wrong with giving somebody a compliment, sure, but it should be organic.

Not sure, it should be a corporate policy exactly.

Yeah, the idea of it being slowed down. Starbucks is going to give additional store hours where needed to account for the new task. Now that is also a question to me, is how long are you taking to come up with what you're going to write on a customer's come Well, it.

Could be the same thing. I mean, I like the one that says you're doing amazing. That's a nice affirmation to get again, though if it gets in the wrong.

Hand, listen to me. It's one of those things where you come in you have had an awful day. Yeah, let's say you are a canal.

Say you were at the dentist for four hours and there was an excavation in your mouth and you smelled burning and.

You can't get the smell out of your nose, and.

Coltering and soldering and all the things, and it's hell. And they tell you you're doing amazing. You do they say that, they said that you're doing so great. I'm like, I'm literally just sitting here dying. I'm not doing anything.

Smell like my own body. Deep.

Yeah, but anyway, that would be nice.

You're doing amazing, right, But if you're not, that's the thing is, it's just going to remind you that you've had an awful day. For example, uh, traveling obgyn who is delivering triplets and has to like for good, has wallet at the hospital and needs to go and needs to borrow money at the gas station just to get home to data point. I can't believe you bought that.

All of it's so implausible that in twenty twenty two, I guess was the time that there would be a traveler like this is a circus of gynecologists and he's traveling and there's triplet. Like if you had a high risk pregnancy, I e. Triplets and you lived in freaking Laguna Beach or Orange County whatever, that you would have some weird guy that can't even pay for gas and see me Valley, come deliver your babies like that. He would be the guy on call that far away when

I made all kinds of babies all right. By the way, some of the Starbucks workers who, according to this, may have writers block find inspiration from their peers who were sharing examples of their work. For example, there's an S right that is on the Starbucks cup and they write every sip begins with S or S for Starbucks. That's what they're writing as their personal note. That's all.

It takes too long too, I'm with you with the hieroglyphic write a heart or.

A happy face or go get them or someone. But someone's gonna find a fence win the day, five pointed stars, the sign of the devil or something like that, and they're gonna be upset.

Yeah, that's true. Satan Satan's on my cup trigger warning.

I mean it's not You could put a swastika and then have to argue it's like, well, it's actually an Indian symbol before the hitler's take it over it.

Yeah, really is that why it's all over your home?

It's not all over my home. It's just in the altar? What jeepers? What am I? Kanye? Now you get me in trouble? Well, oh, we have a quick male thing to get to when we first come back as well. Okay, you miss any part of the show, go back and check out the podcast. Go to KFI AM six forty dot com, slash Gary and Shannon, or anywhere you find your favorite podcast. Find it by typing in Gary and Shannon big back right after this. You've been listening to