Interlude: G.L.U.E.

My Langlitz jacket is starting to finally break in and so it's not creaking as much . If any of you who are special fans of the creaking would like to buy me a brand new Langlitz jacket , I would be on board for that . But hopefully you'll get a few creaks every now and then . I'm actually recording this like moving my arms a lot to try to get some .

Oh , there we go , there's a little creaking . Anyway , this episode is about glue and that is a leather weekend in Houston . I'm going to read the press release just to kind of give you all a little overview of what it is . Houston will once again host Glue Gear , leather , uniform , etc . Weekend , october 11-13 , 2024 .

Produced by Misfits Houston , a Houston leather Levi club which is celebrating their 32nd anniversary , the weekend is one of the longest-running LGBTQ plus fetish weekends in Texas , which started in 2012 . Events will be hosted at Play 2409 Grant Street , rich's Houston Montrose Center and Club Houston in the Montrose neighborhood which serves the LGBTQ plus community .

The weekend will include the annual Mr Third Coast Leather Contest , which represents the states in the Gulf Coast region . The competition is also a direct preliminary contest to International Mr Leather held in Chicago .

Other weekend events include the Misfits Ball featuring DJ Matthew Moody , a cigar social with boot blacks , a bathhouse pool party , the screening of Enquerados . I'm very , very sorry to my Spanish speakers , I am learning Spanish but I'm only like 100 days in on my Duolingo .

Anyway , it's a document that will be a documentary at the Latinx Mixer and there will be 16 Fetish King classes , a Sunday brunch and tea dance and much more . Run passes and individual event tickets are on sale now through October . You will find tickets on Eventbrite and more information at glueweekendcom and I will have that link in the show notes .

I am thrilled to be going for a number of reasons you know . I'm sure I've already mentioned this , probably in one of the interludes . I've been pulling back from leather events . So I only go to a leather event if I am sort of compelled to go and I'm pulling back because I'm focused on finding a local boyfriend . Blah , blah , blah .

If I'm traveling all around the country , I'm not meeting anyone . Local blah , blah blah . I'm spending all that time and money instead of investing in my local community blah , blah blah .

But the reason I'm going to glue is they have asked me to be a judge for the Mr Third Coast Leather Contest and I'm also giving a keynote speech and that is something I have never done . I am crazy thrilled for that , and I just wanted to share a little bit about the event and what I'm thinking about it .

What's interesting about this interlude is it's really combining some other topics I've discussed in other interludes and episodes , including how much I tend to like small events , and including my extensive experience of judging at the Mr Eagle contest last year maybe , yes , last year . You know I'm very curious .

Since I'm going to be a judge , I'm curious if any of the contestants will do their research so thoroughly that they will discover this episode to kind of get a clue as to who I am . So if you're a contestant in the Mr Third Coast Leather Contest , come up to me and say Xanadu and then I'll know you've listened to this episode . Small events are fantastic .

One of my favorite events is Mates in Provincetown and I'm hoping that glue will have that kind of flavor to it . A small event , first of all for an introvert , is a little less overwhelming . It's more manageable just because of the amount of things to do people and energy that's going on around me things to do people and energy that's going on around me .

I also love that you actually get to see people . There were people at IML . I was at IML and there were people I knew were going to be at IML and then I saw photos of them at IML afterwards on Facebook and I never saw them at the event . And my experience at MAL was even worse .

Like at MAL , I had 10 seconds to say hello to someone and then , oh my God , there's the next person I have to go say hello to and I never saw the first person ever again . Big events is fantastic Lots of energy , lots of people , lots of fun but small events you actually run into people again and again .

You can start having longer conversations and start forming connections , and I'm all about connections when I go to events . So that's one of the reasons I like small events . And one of the reasons I'm glad to be going is I am compelled to go as a judge and keynote speaker .

As a judge , I re-listened to my judging interlude to see what I said on that one , and this will be fairly repetitive . I'm a hard judge . I'm a hard judge . I'm going to have the hard question for these contestants and it's not because I'm mean , I'm like the opposite of mean .

However , this is feeding into IML and this will put them on the national stage and I think it's important for them not only to be thinking locally about their local community and how they contribute , but to be aware of larger conversations happening in the community .

When I did the judging episode and I was judging Mr Eagle the really hard question I had was about Touche's 25th anniversary party where , if you know , leather Bar in Chicago has a big party hires a racist , transphobic puppeteer who's making rape jokes . Community is outraged . That's the short version .

If I were judging last year , my question would have been given what happened at MIR , what do you think is the future of this contest ? All right ? So first of all , you have to know what the hell MIR is , which is historically , mr International Rubber Then you have to know what happened . They are now just MIR .

They're open to contestants of every gender and every possible gender identity and the winner will get to choose if they're Mr International Rubber , ms Mix Mrs , whatever International Rubber , ms Mix , mrs , whatever what it calls into question is are these sort of gender-specific titles ?

So if I'm judging a Mr Third Coast Leather , to what extent should it remain a Mr Third Coast Leather ? Not an easy question , because you need to know what's going on out in the fetish world and you need to take a very delicate stand or a stand . Part of the reason I ask these questions is hey , you're going to be on the national stage .

You better know what people are talking about . And hey , you're going to be on a microscope , because now you're going to be a title holder and you better know what you're talking about . But also , I'm also just very curious for people to be able to articulate some sort of position on these issues . I often think you know I talk about this all the time .

This comes up in all my little educational videos Membership in a community is not about knowing the right way to do things

. It's about knowing the terms of the conversation . So there are a gazillion ways to light a cigar . You could be an Obanoff's person or Hubbard's person . On your boots you may have a particular feeling about what hide you like for your floggers ? None of those things matter .

The important thing that matters is that when you're talking to another cigar person , you can talk about the different ways of cutting or lighting or why you like your way . It's very similar that I'm not really interested in someone having the right answer to these impossibly difficult questions .

I like to ask , but being able to participate in the conversation , because conversation , I think , is what moves us as a community towards some sort of solution . Also , the thing with the hard question is I don't necessarily expect you to know the answer . I also expect I don't expect anything .

I also want to see how you respond when you don't know the answer . It was very instructive when I did this in the Mr Eagle contest , because some people clearly just gave an answer and they didn't know anything . They didn't know what touche was , they didn't think to ask me or anything like that . They just gave an answer .

I'm like , oh well , okay , this again is meaningful , not because I'm the mean judge although I am the mean judge but because , as a title holder , you're going to be interviewed in any number of media outlets the local gay rag or some website and you have to be able to say when you don't know something , you just have to say I don't know , or you have to

say I need to know more about that or I need to research that . And , as I mentioned in the judging episode , the best contestants will , after the interviews , go find the answer , find me and tell me what the real answer is . So that shows a kind of persistence and follow through which I think also speaks to a contestant .

I have in my head three different super hard questions . I think I , I think I already know the super hard question I'm going to ask and um I it's really hard , ty , if you listen to this , that whole conversation we had about that trip you're taking to go do that event in Europe , that's really my question . That's all the clues I'm going to give .

So I'm really looking forward to judging and I'm looking forward to Houston . You know , as soon as I announced this everywhere , in all my social media , even on Facebook , I started realizing how many friends I have in Houston , how many leather friends I have in Houston . I don't . I haven't been to Houston . Oh my God . I mean 40 years .

No , I'm not that old . 30 ? No more than 30 . 35 years , maybe . 35 years when I lived in New Orleans . I went to Houston a couple times . You know , new Orleans and Houston have a very interesting kind of—they're close , they're good friends . I will say , you know , between Mardi Gras and Louis there's like a whole Houston New Orleans thing .

So I went to Houston a few times when I lived in New Orleans . But I haven't been to Houston since . I've probably flown through it on Southwest . But beyond that , I'm excited to go to Houston . I'm excited to see and partake in what looks like a really vibrant local community . Now grass is always greener in Wilton Manors .

I'm pretty sure if I asked the people in Houston they would have all kinds of complaints about their community . That's part of what makes a community a community . But I'm excited to see friends that I haven't seen in years . I'm excited to meet people that I've only chatted with online . Decided to meet people that I've only chatted with online .

They are putting me to work . Let me tell you I have a very packed schedule . I get in on Friday . There's a meet and greet with the contestants and judges . Friday night with Cigar Social Very happy to hear there's a cigar-friendly event at this , as I am quite fond of my cigars and then Saturday is interviews .

That's like two hours , and then Saturday at 6 to 9 , I think , is the contest . And then Sunday is this brunch thing where I am giving a keynote . Now I don't know what the hell I'm going to say and I've not had a lot of input on what it should look like . It should be about 20 minutes long .

Apparently , people will be brunching while I talk and that will present certain challenges . In itself , I'm certainly capable of commanding a room , but if you're competing against cinnamon rolls or biscuits , then it's tougher . Now hopefully it's at a hotel and I'm competing against , like buffet scrambled eggs which are dry and horrible .

But I've been thinking about a couple topics and I have a few . I don't know where I'm gonna land . So one of them is really , um , you know , in disability theory there's this oh , hold on , I'm gonna look up her name Garland Disability Theory . One moment , people , I told you it was unedited and raw . It is not Garland , oh , it is Garland Thompson .

One moment , I got to find a real name Rosemary Garland Thompson . Rosemary Garland Thompson does disability theory , which is an academic sub-discipline that theorizes disability . Anyway , she has this one article about misfits and it's really about not fitting into the environment . I mean , it's a little bit more complicated than that .

So I thought it'd be interesting to do a keynote about misfitting for the misfits and really thinking about how we craft spaces where we do fit , and I think that's a really beautiful way for thinking about community . Very uplifting Applause , applause , applause . Take my cinnamon roll about .

It's made me think a little bit about how I got to where I'm at and all this stuff I do the podcast and the videos and my old website and the YouTube and the Tumblr and all that .

It all started because I was looking to get laid , and so I thought about doing some sort of speech about the power of trying to get laid and thinking about how we can create change , we can help others simply because we want to get a good trick right , like in those moments when we're looking for sex , we can actually teach people new skills , we can learn

new skills , we can welcome people into communities , and so thinking about how my journey led to where I was at but it wasn't any sort of grand plan , it was just I was trying to get laid . And if that's happened to me , what can you do when you're trying to get laid ? So I'm thinking about that . Oh , and if y'all have preferences , let me know .

So there's misfitting , which might be a little dry , I don't know , I think it's powerful , it's a little dry for a brunch .

And then there's trying to get laid , which is funny , kind of funny , right , it's an interesting concept , I think , about how we stumble into service simply by trying to get our genitals happy , and then I don't know no-transcript in terms of leather , just because I don't know that really , you know , part of what they wanted was something a little joyous .

I think they wanted something . You know , like we know you're a great talker , you know you can talk about things and you can be funny . So I'm like , okay , we want to keep this inspirationally happy , joy , joy .

And so I'm thinking less about some of the complex issues we're facing as a community and more about um possibilities for positive change , and which both those talks are really about positive . Like you know , the whole idea of of misfit is creating the environment where you do fit , which is about creating community . How do we create community where people fit ?

Um , oh , that is , oh god , I'm really good , I might do that one . And then obviously , trying to get laid and stumbling into service is really great . And also about aspirational service types things , and I think I'm gonna yeah , I think I'm gonna do that . It is gonna be a really crazy weekend for me Fly in , busy , busy , busy , busy , busy .

Fly home Sunday , and then I'm traveling the next weekend as well to LA , just for a day , essentially . So I have a really crazy October coming up . But I'm excited for Glue . I am super excited . I'm excited for the event . I'm excited because I like judging people . That's kind of a joke . Go back and listen to the judging interlude , it'll make more sense .

I'm excited to see friends and to meet friends , and I'm kind of excited for this keynote and kind of have no fucking idea what I'm doing . So we will see . If you're there , please say hello .

Your best chance of grabbing me will be really during that Friday night , because you don't get to come to the judges interviews , obviously , and then during the contest , I'm going to be sitting at some table being all judgy , judgy , um .

So your best , best bet is to get me a Friday night , cause that seems like the most low key social and I hope to meet so many of you and um , that's it . I'll give a report once it's done too , but you've not been to Glue , think about

it . And if you can't make it to Glue , think about what local events you can attend or support or create local or regional events . They are critical for entry points for people , they are more affordable than some of the national ones , they create more local connections and they're often a super duper lot of fun .

So I hope to see you in Houston , or I hope you see yourself in some local or regional event near you . That's all for now and I will see you . No , I won't see you because I'm on a podcast . That's all for now . I'll catch you . Am I catching you ? I don't know . I hope all of y'all are having a great , great journey .