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Forced Adoptions

Nov 29, 202518 min
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Forced Adoptions.

Parents threatened and blamed by authorities as 1,000 adopted children returned to care.

Verity's breaking point with her adopted son Liam came after she had already been threatened with knives and arrested by police following untrue allegations.Her husband Ian recounts that she said at one point to a social worker: "What if we just can't do this any more?" He says the social worker's reply came without a moment's hesitation: "You'll be prosecuted for child abandonment."Verity and Ian are just two of 50 parents the BBC has spoken to during a six-month investigation into why adoptive families are being broken apart and their children returned to care.It has uncovered a hidden world where parents are subjected to lies and blame by authorities across the UK, as they struggle with the needs of traumatised children who have often suffered abuse and neglect before they were removed from their birth families.Parents speak of being threatened, harassed and pushed into mental health crisis, while one adopted teenager who returned to care says that with more support his family might still be together now.Warning - this story contains discussion of suicideThe BBC conducted the most extensive Freedom of Information request ever into adoptions that have broken down, finding that more than 1,000 adopted children in the UK have returned to care in the past five years. That is much higher than the figure in a recent government report - but the true number is likely to be even larger, as only a third of authorities said they collected this data as standard practice.One couple told us the issue is a "national scandal" and that "adoption as it stands" is "not fit for purpose".As part of the investigation, we also learned:




  • Nearly a quarter of the adoptive parents who spoke to the BBC said they had been taken into police custody as a result of allegations of abuse by their children, which were later found to be untrue
  • A whistleblowing social worker revealed a culture of blame against parents when adoptions run into problems and said they are "sold a lie" about post-adoption support
  • New research by Lancaster University found that 38% of adoptive parents said they had considered returning a child to care



A Department for Education spokesperson said that "adoptive parents do an incredible job providing a loving and supportive home to some of the most vulnerable children in our society", and that while those arrangements sometimes break down "support is in place to help adoptive families and keep them together where possible".The department said it will offer families earlier and better support through the Children's Wellbeing and Schools Bill. But neither the government nor the Local Government Association, which represents local authorities in England and Wales, responded to the BBC's questions about parents being threatened and blamed.Verity and Ian, from Yorkshire, adopted their son Liam and daughter Lauren 15 years ago, when Liam was two-and-a-half and his little sister was one.As Liam grew, his behaviour became volatile and increasingly violent, throwing things and screaming at his parents.They now know that before Liam was adopted, he had lived in a household where there was extensive domestic abuse.

File On 4 Investigates - Adoption: The Blame GameThe lies and blame within the UK's adoption system. Some adoptive parents say they’ve been given so little support that they’ve been forced to return their children back into care.
Listen on Sounds
Listen on BBC Sounds now - or on BBC Radio 4 at 20:00 GMT on Tuesday 2 December, and 11:00 GMT on Wednesday 3 December.


Verity and Ian were sent on seven parenting courses during Liam's childhood, which Verity says placed the blame on them as a couple. Meanwhile, she says: "The fundamental cause of his behaviour is being totally missed and ignored. The trauma is being totally ignored."The couple recall good times, too, as they supported Liam's passion for dance, watching him at countless competitions. But they describe his teenage years as a "living hell" and they feared for their safety as he would threaten them with knives.One morning, Verity left a note for Ian and drove to the coast with the intention of killing herself. A passer-by spoke to her, which she says saved her life.On another occasion, after one of Liam's meltdowns, his parents called the police as they had been advised to in a situation like this. But it was Verity who was arrested, after Liam accused her of assault."It's the worst experience I've ever had. And that was the point at which I knew that we couldn't even phone the police any more," she says.

Image source,Verity and Ian
Image caption,Liam was adopted aged two-and-a-half from a household where there was extensive domestic violence

Verity was released without charge but she and Ian knew they could not continue to live with Liam. Having already been threatened with prosecution, however, Ian said they knew the process of returning Liam to care would be "adversarial" and "laden with threats and misleading bullying tactics".Similar legislation across the nations of the UK allows children to be taken back into care, but local authorities require each case to reach a "threshold" where they need to intervene, which usually means looking for evidence of abuse or neglect.Ian and Verity's home was described in one local authority document as "not a place where Liam feels loved and supported". Verity says: "The way it's written is still blaming us as parents for the home situation, but actually that is not the case at all."

'My heart just broke'
In the end, worried they could no longer keep their daughter safe, Verity and Ian felt they had to force the local authority's hand. Through their solicitor, they gave a deadline after which they would no longer be able to offer Liam a home, and it would become the council's duty to accommodate him.Liam was away from the house, working with one of the dance competition organisers, when she broke the news to him. "She came up to me and she was like, 'I've just had a call with your social worker and you can't go home'," he told the BBC."And just hearing that, my heart just broke."Verity says: "It was awful. It was traumatic. It was haphazard. We were forced into doing it this way, and essentially making him homeless, in order for the local authority to get their acts together."Now aged 17, settled and living independently after several previous moves, Liam takes responsibility for his behaviour, but says it is "a shame that it's impacted what I call a family". He says returning to care was "the kick up the arse" that he needed."But I think if social services had sorted themselves out, and I think if we had sorted ourselves out, personally, we could have pushed through and maybe it would have been a different situation," he said.

Image source,BBC/Stephen Fildes
Image caption,Specialist adoption solicitor Damien Dobson says families are being forced into heartbreaking decisions

Social workers are involved in every adopted child's case and often families continue to need their support for many years. They also play a vital role in identifying and helping children at genuine risk of harm.Verity and Ian's local authority, North Yorkshire Council, said it couldn't discuss individual cases, but it recognised "how difficult challenges linked to adoption can be for families" and it said it provided "compassionate, practical support when this happens".Parents who can no longer cope, or no longer feel they can keep their family safe, have to take the "heartbreaking" decision to "legally abandon" their son or daughter, says Damien Dobson, a specialist adoption solicitor.Over the past five years he has worked with more than 400 families and says the numbers seeking help are rising.England's Children Act is outdated, Mr Dobson says. He says local authorities should have an option to voluntarily accommodate a child that would be considered beyond the parent's control, without the presumed need for evidence of blame.

'Desperate for help'
Verity and Ian were among dozens of families the BBC met in Manchester, at an event organised by a group called Patch - which stands for Passionate Adopters Targeting Change with Hope - whose members are adoptive families challenging what they see as fundamental failings in the system."Adoption is lifelong, so must be the support," says Jackie from Essex, one of the parents.Fiona Wells, who is adopted herself and a social worker, set up the group after she faced huge issues with her three adopted children. Patch now has more than 1,800 online members. "Families are joining us all the time who are desperate for help, who have reached crisis," she says.




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Transcript

Speaker 1

And it's my daily vant. Of course, the next subject for today, which is twentyth for November twenty twenty five, there's FALSD adoptions. Yeah, it's a bit of an emotive subject for me and I can probably explaining a little bit later, but yeah, like I subscribe on YouTube, I'd be perfect if you could. And if you're listening from somewhere else, it's at my Daily rant UK on YouTube, that would be perfect if you could join in. So yeah, my emotive subject today. I really do get emotional on

this one because well it's something that's close to her heart. Anyway, parents threatened and blamed by authorities as a thousand adopted children have returned to care. There's a personal story in one of the newspapers, and I'll read varieties. Breaking point with adopted son Liam came after she had already been threatened with knaves and arrested by police following untrue allegations. Now this has something common or these stories untrue allegations.

A husband recounts that she at one point, I husband recounts that she said, at one point to a social worker, what if we can't just do this anymore? Which is fair enough most people say that. He says that social workers reply again without a moment's notice or hesitation, will you'll be prosecuted for child abandonment and this is an

adopted parent at this case very tinian. Are just fifty say just two a fifty parents this report had spoken to during a six month investigation into why adopted families are being broken apart from their children and returning to

the care system. As a covered a hidden world where parents are subjected to lies and blame by authorities across the UK as they struggle with the needs of traumatized children who have often suffered abuse and neglect before they removed from the birth fumily is I'll tell you more about the birth families later. Parents speaker of being threatened, harassed, and parents pushed into mental health crisis. Well one of doubt. The teenager who returned to care says that was more

supports that with more support his family might still be together. Now. Yeah, I think that's the word as well in brackets support. The News here conducted the most extensive freedom of information requests ever into adoptions that are broken down, finding that more than a thousand adopt the children in the UK have returned to cand the past five years at twenty twenty to twenty twenty five. That's a very high figure than the figure and the recent government report, but the

true number is very much bigger than that. Yeah, so that's adoptive parents haven't having problems. A thousand adoptive parents are more. They've been returned to souchial work care now on the back of this report. As a commentant commenting person, so they commented, and I think I'm going to read this out to you as well. The UK pretty much only permits adoption up until the age of six, which I find to be a ridiculous requirement. So many children are not in a position and not ready to be

adopted at that age. So that but I don't get because the UK pretty much only permits adoption up into the age of sixt that bit which this person finds to be a ridiculous requirement. Okay, but this bit, so many children are not in a position not ready to be adopted by that age. Does that mean they need to be adopted later after they're traumatized, because you know, they've known their parents longer. Do they need to be more traumatized for them to fit in the adoption system.

I don't know what this lady's trying to say. Please let your mind bugle with that and leave your comments down below on YouTube please or any other social media platform. They should open it up and put the decision back into the children's hands. Now that's a good idea, and give them the power whether it's plus and decide if they want or not want to be adopted. Yeah, that'd

be good. Then they can be placed with families opening for adoption or begin meeting perspective families the US to be adopted by the age of six is not a good system, very true. It certainly doesn't help that far too many adoptive pants are twisted and hoping adopt, then we'll heal their trauma, which is using infertility. On top of this, many wanted to just adopt little babies like a blank slate. So, yeah, you don't adopt because you've got a problem with your fertility. You don't adopt because

that suits you in your bloody lifestyle. There's also a huge lack of support for adoptive families. Yeah, well, there's not a lot of support ever for theological families. They have unique needs and complications that require a lot of community support. Yes, so do we the biological families anyway, we're talking about the adoptive families. Then there are the original families, which, yeah, I've just mentioned. I advise anyone to see how dangerous, u hinged and scary families can

be when they have had their children removed. You can see groups on Facebook, she says, called social workers Exposed Forced adoptions every town in this country, Peterborough, London for adoption activists on Facebook and all these little ones. Yeah, forced adoptions edinburn's arm and they're threatening, you know, with

personal information social work as well. I don't agree to, you know, break the law, but you know, if they've done wrong, why not publish their details, but in a nice, calm, constructive way that you know you did wrong, we're going to do about it, rather than you know, you don't do nothing naughty to them. Of course, some are perhaps innocent, and there are innocent biological families, and they didn't deserve

to have their children taken away. However, if they're able to make contact with the children part of their adoption, they can really get their heads and turn those children toxic. Well, no, they don't turn the children toxic. Deliberately the biological parents when they're going to care and they're going to be adopted, they do it because they're traumatized, and the biological parents have added chance to recover from that traumatization, which I'll

explain a little bit later on. And it says basically, from start to finish and beyond, it's a cycle of misery and toxic born from the trauming pain that begins. You know, it's a sad state of affairs. Like everyone, the birth parents search work as the adoptees. The adoptive parents are constantly award of each other, rereading and worth editing that the adoptees are not sharing equal blame as they deserves no blame of alill they never ask for

any of it, especially when they are still in their minor. Yeah, well I kind of agree a little bit with that last bit. I mean, nobody wants once any of that, do they? But and then of course, hundreds of thousands of unmarried women were forced to give up their babies for adoption, and they should receive a government apology. Well I don't know if they've had the apology by now, but fucking hell, part the language, why shouldn't you have apologized by now this is my daily vant Maine said

the odd swear word, and I shouldn't I did. That was the motive subject inquired by the Joint Committee and human rights were set up followings of reports by and these channels. One hundred and eighty five thousand women in fifty sixties and seventies were shamed and conhearsed into giving up their babies. And yeah, and ever since then, of course you've had the natural forced adoptions by birth parents.

So they started off in the early fifties, sixties and seventies, taking mothers away from babies, away from mothers that weren't married, didn't have a lot of money, blah blah blah, and now they're still doing it. Forced adoption around the world is happening because governments don't care. People are too traumatized and too weak. I mean, one guy I've met many times forced adoption dot Com, Forced adoption dot Com. He's got a couple of books in Joseph. An amazing guy.

He sums it up. He's next county counselor from Kent in England. A lady came to him one day saying, look, I've got problems. Can you help me? They sacked him because he's trying to help people, and he's saying and this is true. It's a punishment without a grime. Baby's

taking at birth for risk of emotional abuse. How can you predict that you're gonna harm your child in the future if you're harming him now, or yeah, lose your children go to jow you deserve it, But how can you predict in a crystal ball it's a future risk of emotional harm? Toddler's take at six am by squads have ununiformed police and social workers for this that may

never happen. Whether those who putict the fouture used to tart cards, crystal balls, or tea leaves is the material because the fact is that parentfully their child to care for risk of events that may never happen by gone to government stats are far more likely to happen under state care, so not the birth parents. These children would be damaged in state care than from loving imperfect parents. No parent is perfect, but they try their best. And a lot of reports that I can't tell you right

now because it's on the internet anyway. Sue Reader is one of them from the Daily mail of ten fifteen years ago reported that children are better off in an imperfect family situation than being in care. And of course it's the family courts that make most of this real and they shouldn't do because you know, they listen to the liars, they're not bothered about what the parents are saying. By the time the parents get to speak, it's actually am I over for them, so the night mayor begins.

When social workers act like a second police force, punishing parents have not committed any crime. They do this by obtaining an emergency care order in the parents' absence. Often they take away the children for care. They claim these children have a suffered emotional harm or worse, still at risk of it in the future. On this basis, an order is nearly always granted without permission. It's disgusting. Of course.

The kangaroo culture and the legal aid lawyers, known in the trades as professional losers use bised clients to listen to the social workers. If that rings a bell anywhere? Yeah, And then there was this what do they know? Request? Yeah, they wanted to know. Do social workers conceal child abuse? Telling children that their parents don't love or want them, telling children their parents are dead. We're moving children from

parents and allegations not believing children when they disclosed abouse. Yeah, because they like children care. Even nowadays, they get sexually assaulted or raped by a professional or a care and everyone looks the other way. Bloody, help out of my language. Stop parents seeking meddle advice to bring attention, you know, like Munchan's there's no People may be worriers, but they're

not doing it deliberately. They may go to hospital, they may get a doctor for medication for reasons they don't understand. You know, why is my child being bruised? You know all this already, the shaking babyb syndrome, all this stuff. Now, this is all this stuff. There's a link between social workers, police in the court trying to take children away because, as Maggie Turtle said many years ago, from children's screening to be heard, it's a multi million pound industry and

it really is. I could go on this subject a lot more, and I indte you to email me Freedom Talk Radio twenty thirteen at gmail dot com. I really do help you to email me Ami, and and I just want you to share your story and we'll get your word out there. On the Internet and YouTube live at the moment on Twitter X on Facebook, on riverside FM. I love you guys. Please support the channel on YouTube. I hit the bell, like, share comment, and of course I have a good day for now. Oh yeah, I

was gonna say. And of course you know I read every comment that you provide. Yeah,

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