Ep -369: Crawlspace (1986).

Thank you.

Check check. Check your shorts, bud. Check it. For one jolly Hershey Square. One non periol. Those are fly eggs. The white things. Jesus Christ. I once I was behind uh I was behind some parents and they were they had a you know a small child who's probably shits in their pants age and they they said to him, I heard him out loud. Do we need to change your shit? Change your shit. Yeah, we're gonna get new shit.

What that what a weird way to say or you just constantly have shit in your pants so you gotta change it to a mixture. Some new fresher shit. That shit's been in there for a while. Let's get a new energy. Was this like straight regular ass parents? Or was it? No, this was uh

people who go to the like the monster truck rallies. This rally and I dude walking out, this is the conversation that we've got. If I shit my pants, I have to go change my shit. My shit being my pants and my whole outfit. Yeah. Change your shit, dude. We need to change your fucking shit. Change your fucking shit. Yeah. Wow. I've never heard it put that way. It's just so weird it was just caught me off guard. Not to a kid.

Like if if you if I shit my pants next to you, will you be like we need to go buy your house and you need to change your shit I think I know what you mean. But if it's a kid, like I'm not gonna change my own shit, you change my

Clean me up. It's so funny how a kid will just completely be fine with walking around with a whole patty back there. Just just like dude, like'cause sometimes it's like it's a straight it's a smash burger. It is just It's like it's so round, it's just perfectly smashed from the ass to the fucking diaper or pants. And then you yeah, you like go to change them. It's like you're taking a handprint and clay but it's just two cheeks. Seriously. And you it's just like fucking patty.

Yeah. Is that true? I I don't have kids. I don't I d never had an experience that I'm like you've been block you've been playing for twenty, thirty minutes with a fucking patty like that? You don't even care? Patty cake. So wait, hold is the it's this is diaper time. Sometimes

Mostly diaper times. You know, you get a little older then might there might be an accident. But yeah, mostly diaper times. Yeah. Then you have like a training pant too, which is like a plastic underwear. Yeah. But it like the the The leg holes have elastic so it keeps in the liquid. Yeah. I'm wearing those right now. Speaking of sponsors. I'll I'll be wearing them soon.

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And Josh, this is your pick this week, sir. I picked it. It's Josh's I picked a wiener. Infig a wiener. Let us fill us in. What What were your th what were your thoughts? I remember it was on my list, I put it on my list and I'm like, There's a reason that I wanna watch this movie. I don't remember why I chose it, but I was hot tubbin on the midday and I was searching searching. I was scrolling through things. For some reason I was I came across this movie. I said, Oh

I like Klaus Kinski. I like Myn Fitzcaraldo, Nasferatu, and I figure I like his face. He's got a good face. He's got a hell of a face on that classkinsky. Yeah. So I was like, I'll I'll check it out. It's got a bunch of I'm not gonna say it's got one person I wanted to see in particular. Besides Klaus? Besides Klaus Kinski. And it I only realized it as soon as the name popped up in today. Which by the way.

When you saw the credits, I gotta apologize. I didn't know. I didn't know. I shot off a text so fast. Josh is off the bandwagon. Charles banded in this motherfucker. Charles Face. Produced by Yes. The band. Yep, we're we're back on the band. This is a yeah. Hey, it's twenty twenty it's a new year. Yep. We we said back this year we'll we'll we'll get back in. Josh, first thing here we go.

First chance he got. You knew it was gonna happen. I didn't even know it. I know but to be fair, yeah, you didn't know. We didn't know going into the That's how ingrained you are though in the band fucking Legend. That's true. That's the that's why we know who we are. Especially in the eighties because he was running Empire Pictures out of Rome and they did fucking ghoulies and they were doing castle freaks. This is the high point. Yeah.

Yeah, you don't gotta see it more than once, oftentimes. I mean if it's a castle freak or ghoulies, yeah. Or troll. Or troll. Sure. There's actually a lot. Yeah. Okay. But you don't maybe have to see crawl space twice. No, I'm I think I'm good.

Unless you're a Tanay fan. Is it Tanay? I kept on being like I'm gonna go ahead and say Tane because Shaboy has The LP of Tane Kane. She is straddling a horse on the back of that. You bet your ass she is. Appaloosa even. Let me fucking get a gander at this second. Tane Kane? Is that what it says? It's but her last name is McClure.

Her last name is McClure. Yeah. Um,'cause she's the daughter of the famous Doug McClure, who we might know from Humanoids from the Deep. For the people who can't see what's happening, uh Josh just whipped out a record he got. So of Tane Kane, which I believe is Tane because it's got an accent over the E. And for for the listeners that are watching on the video, they can't.

uh video of us doing podcasts. That's over on our Patreon. Quick plug for that. Yep. Yes. That's where this is going up. But For the rest of you, damn this fucking vinyl looks. So crazy. My path to Taneos are amazing. Has little to do with It was she I'm sorry, who the fuck is this now? She's the one singing in the movie. She's the one singing. She's the one singing. Sophia in that movie.

Sweet kink. Dude, her and and the other blonde that looks exactly like the other toothy blonde. Yeah. Who's like, that doesn't that blonde have like a crazy accent? I don't know. They I they were both interchangeable to me. Really? I could not tell them apart. There was like the hick blonde and then that blonde. Then there's Tane. Tane. But this is great. This I'm my I'm intrigued now. This record looks so cool. I've been obsessed. I get obsessed with

usually artists no one's ever heard of before. And I just and I'm like and they speak to me for whatever reason. Tane's not the one actually. Tane's is adjacent to the one. There's an artist named Sandy Stewart who was around in the seventies and eighties. And she used to write for Stevie Nick. She wrote like Seven Wonders for Fleetwood Mac. She wrote um a couple songs for on Nightbird.

And she was like Stevie Nicks in her entourage, one of the one of the three women that were on um the Nightbird record. And how did I figure out oh I bought a record randomly from eighty seven called Blue Yonder. It's a band I I had no idea. I'm like, this looks like it's something I want to hear. It's black and white. It's got a picture of a woman on the front of it. And I'd loved her voice so much and I loved the song so much. And turned out she wrote all of them.

And that was her band. It was actually her second solo record. I got obsessed. I went down the rabbit hole. I bought everything that I could find that she had done. Oh wow. So she wrote one of the better songs. Probably the best song on this record. Yeah. She's just singing these lines. She wrote for a lot of people. She wrote for Belinda Carlyle and Stevie Nixon Stevie Nix throughout the years. And just tons of people. So then you're like, oh so you had this already? I had this already. What?

I had this already. I already had the Ton A. Kane record. And I was um and I think I was just like I was just researching, I'm like, so what is t what's her deal?'Cause the record's good. Yeah. The record's I mean, objectively a good Seven like eighties nineteen eighty one. It looks like it. Yeah. It's looks but great. It does. But it is good. Yeah. It's that classic shot on a horse. Yeah. What like this she's wearing like leather, like

Headbands, like just reproduce one of those TV. On a Pegasus or something. Just yeah, just all of us all three fucking nuts on butts, just fucking I love it. Uh yeah. I would love that. It's incredible. It's just uh Just at the perfect Native American. Yeah. Just at sunset, it's like the perfect uh just appropriata.

It looks great. Yeah. It looks great. I just can't believe you had that before this movie because I didn't know who this lady was until I saw her. You totally have a hard on for actors who also make records, which is great. And I love it. I fucking love that about you. That's why I picked this movie. And I don't r I didn't remember that's why I picked the movie. I got a a wild hair to pick the movie because I was like, she's in a few she's in a bunch of movies.

But she was in she directs and produces her own movies these days. And uh She's got one of those IMDBs that if you look at it you can tell that she wrote the entire motherfucking thing. Oh like well. Paragraphs and paragraphs and paragraphs about accolades and film festivals and the latest shit. You look at the movies and it's like

Tina takes a top off seven and like all'cause she did a lot of booby movies. Yeah. But she also directs hell of rad documentaries. Like she did a Hugh Hefner one and she's done she did the Betty White story. She does all kinds of like rad shit. I would say more in the eighties she was definitely topping topping off. Is that right? Yeah. She don't think he got topped in this one. Okay. She gets topped off. Yeah, her her the the yeah, the ed the ends of her brasier got

They just have the whole threat in them. You don't gotta risk your nipples. You know what? You're halfway there, just take the rest, take the brow right off. It's simple. Easy peasy. But I'm shy. I don't want anyone to see my boob. Someone is watching. Someone is waiting. Waiting until you're alone. Waiting until your turn. Waiting until you're terrified. can try to run. You can try to hide. But there is really only one way out. Crawl space. Between the wall and hell.

This intro is amazing because it's It's a double peep. Yeah. It's a double peep. Exactly. Well, there was a double peep in Hyde hide in the house, actually. There was a double but it's a double peep outside. Double peeping this reminded me of Hyder in the House in a major way, and there was a double peep. Weirdly, Hyder in the House's double peep is very unorthodox because they're both inside of a house, looking outside of a house.

Now in in this case this is it's two it's a man outside and a man in the crawl space. Yep. I love I love I mean, I'm always it's always funny to me seeing a a peep and Tom in these old eighties movies, but A peeper peeping a peeper. Yeah. It's really funny to me. I don't even know if the peeper if Klaus because Klaus is peeping, he's the landlord. Yeah.

He's peeping. I don't even think he sees the guy peeping in the window. He c he clocks him. Yeah, it does yeah,'cause he smirks him later. He knows Well yeah. Yeah. He knows that he knows the drill. He peeped him. Yeah. He peeped who who's peeping who? Yeah. Who's peeping who in this motherfucker? I I I I love that though. I did also like joke. Double peep. Check the check also. We've seen it. Amazing.

And yeah, I lo you know, I lo I love the hide in the house stuff. I love people between walls and vents and stuff peeping around. And you can't get any creepier than than Klaus Kinski. Yeah. I mean, okay Bucey, yeah. Prince right there. But man, this dude is just full on I just get the ick looking. Yeah, he's very icky hard.

Yeah. I think I would too. I would too. I feel somewhat protected. I feel like you could nuzzle up to Bucey. Yeah. Also there's there's a there's like a charming, warm side to Bucey. Like he he'll switch it. He does not hide her in the house. Like you you kinda like him, he's kinda charming, you kinda wanna be his buddy.

But this guy uh not a second do I wanna be his buddy or like hang out. No, no, no I don't wanna spend any time with this dude. There's a documentary. Uh huh. That um I I wanna I would almost said Vim Venders, but I mean Werner Herzog. Werner Herzog made a documentary about Klaus Kinski.

as his best friend called My Best Fiend, which is a documentary about being friends with Klaus Kinski. But do you know about the other short film that was made by the director of this movie? No, no, no. That's called Please Kill Mr. Kinsky. It's about his situation dealing with Klaus Kinsky Kinsky.

on the set of this fucking movie. I bet. I don't I don't know. So many people don't ever want to work with him. No. His f like half his family didn't show up to his fucking funeral. Like he's a piece of shit. He's an insane piece. He's a big old giant chunk of shit. And you feel it looking at him and on screen. In the the short film that the director made, like he like there's a bunch of footage of him being

A capital T toolbox. I believe it. I wanna see it. Yeah. It's only like eight minutes long. I watched it last night and I was like holy shit. I never thought that Klaus Kinsey was like a cool dude, but You had you just kinda like I think that guy might not be a good dude. Isn't it like that when you're like I know Jeff's you're a big ma Marilyn Manson fan, but like when people like say that, Oh, he did some lascivia shit, I'm like, yeah.

He's fucking Marilyn Manson. What did you what do you were he's not planting roses over here? Yeah, what do you think? Look at him. When did he say, Oh, I'm just this is just an act. I read his fucking book. I was like, no, this dude's for really. He's psycho. Yeah. This dude's a maniac. Yeah. Yeah. But Klaus Kinsey, the same way. He's a dangerous, crazy man. And I feel it. And I was scared of him w just

Ew, I just don't wanna be near him. I don't want him sneaking around my pipes. No. He started not even not joking, this is fact. He started six fistfights within the first two days of With what with who? There's only one reason Yeah. He cast it's all women. Like his fucking How did this dude get any fucking work? No one needs him that badly in a movie. Well i he's a good actor. Fine. There's a lot of good actors.

And they're like, imagine being an out-of-work actor and that guy's still getting work and you're sitting there like what the fuck? How's that guy still working? This guy's fighting directors and like literally not listening to any direction.

He would get mad if you would say action. He would get mad if you would say cut. He would get mad if you would say anything. That's the whole that's the whole thing. And the director's like, what do you want me to say? And he's like, nothing. I'll start when I'm ready. Shut the fuck There's no way you're good enough to like have this attitude. You're not that great. Yeah, you look crazy and you're the camera likes you but fuck off They tried to fire him right away.

And why did you hire him? Empire or whatever the studios were like, he's marquee, like meeting the seats value. So Barely though. Keep him on. Yeah. Like for I mean, maybe in Europe. And in in eighty six More so than now. A bunch studio like Empire. Yeah, okay. Have you s you guys seen Nosferatu with Klauskinski? I think I saw a long ass time ago.

famous him playing Nosferatu like. I've seen that image and it looks amazing. He looks so crazy. He's essentially looking like uh he's like ditched the bald cap in the teeth and he's just like He's still scary. It's me. Yeah. Um but in Nosferatu the the Fucking Werner Herzog version, he's just like, My name is Count Dracula. Like, I don't give a fuck. Yeah, we're not trying to h I'm not uh you know Is Runner Hertzog just like stoked that he doesn't have to do any work? He's just like

Yeah, maybe. Roll'em. Yeah. And then fucking th the uh a movie comes out of whatever Klaus has decided to do that day. I guess that's the way to do it. Like I've you know, there's there's bands that people are in where you're like, Okay, well this person is temperamental, but they're also the draw. Yeah. Like they are the they are the artist who's who people are there to see. And Werner Herzog has got his own crew as well. People are going to come see any movie that he does, a select

handful of people are going to do that. But if you're like if you have a guy like that, isn't it better to not fight them? 'Cause he will fight you. He will actually f punch you out. He will go fist of cups every time over not doing it. Wouldn't you rather just like, okay, well this guy's gonna do it the way he does it. Let's just do it that way.

And it's and they have friends. They grew up they like they know they like I say they grew up together. I think I think that fucking Klaus Kinsey grew up in hell and he was is a thousand years old. Yeah. Well the director even's even like okay like

I'm in trouble. He read the interview before he even got to got to work with him. He's like, I'm fucked. I just read the interview about how much he hates directors. This guy's coming to set. I'm the director. I'm fucked. So then he's like, okay, how am I gonna get through this? Try to fire him, okay. Okay, but I'm just gonna like try to work with them. Like, okay Klaus, you don't want me to say action, you don't want me to say cut, what do you want me to say? Can I say your name? Okay.

And every time he'd get mad, every director's always saying action, action, action, action. And then he's like, okay, I'll say whatever you want. I'll say Klaus. He's like, fine. After like a day of him saying Klaus, every director says Klaus, Klaus, Klaus, Klaus. Like literally. And then so he's like, What do you want me to do? Like he's trying to work with the dude, but like Klaus doesn't want to work with.

That's just how it is. He wants the camera to be rolling. He wants to perform. He wants to get that money. He's turned down like Spielberg and like some other things like'cause he wasn't gonna get paid enough. But isn't that something Spielberg asked for him?

Well there's a reason for it. So they claim he's got a face. Yeah, he's got a face, but I don't think he I don't think he's worth the trouble. I don't think he would have got that Scooby gig in whatever Indiana Jones. There's no way. I think definitely if he was working in twenty twenty six

That fucking dude would be shoveling french fries at the local Burger King'cause there's no fucking way. Like you're gonna act like that. No, no, no. No. Assault charges galore just for the fucking oh, we worked with him for two days, I got a black eye and a busted tooth. He would just go solo. Make go by his own camera. He should have done that anyways. He seemed like if you hate directors so much, then you go do it yourself.

Yeah. Or don't be an actor. Or yeah, how about yeah, pick a different profession. Yeah. What else could he do though? He's too crazy. He's too crazy to do anything. But actors have to, you know what, follow the fucking director. Yeah. They're at the job. That's literally the job. And you make a ton of money to do it. Shut the fuck up. Do your job.

Yeah, and you barely have to do anything. You just you already look cool. That's it. That's what we're paying you for. Just Put'em on camera, throw some lipstick and the weird Nazi hat on'em.

Call good. The deal with him is though, like if you make a movie with Klaus Kinski, you better just get a couple extra cameras because then you're gonna make a documentary about making the movie with Klaus Kinski. Which we probably do even better than the fucking. Is a an amazing movie. It's about a guy trying to take a fucking trying to pull a ship down the Amazon but he can't he needs to pull a ship over a mountain using

people in the Amazon. Is that the one that's like old though? Like it's like in olden times? Like it's like yeah, it's like pure like they're it almost looks like a night or something like that. Uh No. Okay. What's that one? Where he's throwing actual monkeys away. Aguire Wrath of God. Jesus Christ. There's a couple clips I saw of that where he just like throws a monkey like it's an apple. Dude, he's a bad guy. The Fritz Caral though, he's like it's like a

twenties to the forties, somewhere like that. But I think it might I might I might be wrong. The Fitzgerald is about this guy on the boat. And then the documentary I think is them pulling a boat. They couldn't get the boat through the Amazon, so they had to pull it over a mountain. And they made a documentary called Burden of Dreams, which is about the making of this fucking other crazy movie. Of course, Klaus is centered in the a center of both of them. So you get your money's worth.

I also realized and we've talked about this movie before, but I don't think I clocked it. He was in it, but the movie Venom, which we have Oliver Reed Safe of the Yeah, yeah. But it's Oliver Reed, who's also a handful and a fist fighter. And Klaus Kinski and his fucking snake. I think we might need to do that movie. That might be a fucking wild road. Oh my god. It's pretty wild. I saw it a long time ago. I don't think it's good. Oh, it's not gonna be good.

But like the I can't even imagine being on set with those two fucking Just terrors. Let's just watch the documentary about the making of Venom. There's gotta be one. Yeah. If the director even made it out alive. Yeah. Shlaus and Ollie. The party years. The party month.

Dude, I was like, whoa. I had I mean, we hear legend about Oliver Reed. Yeah. And then you got fucking Klaus in there too. I'd rather deal with a snake. Seriously, give me the snake in the side. But this movie's crazy though, right? Very. It's nuts. I I mean I just I'm gonna just jump to the end a little bit, but I love seeing Klaus just on a fucking little skateboard going through a vessel. That was f I've never thought I'd see that into into the movie. Did you? That was you?

They're crawling in there is like, you know, it'd be so much easier if you had a little scooter thing in here, like a little skateboard thing or whatever. And like literally as I'm thinking that he's like pops down. And I'm like I just made that happen. Oh my god. It's a it was incredible. Good job, Brian,'cause I I loved seeing that. It was excellent. Yeah.

So boring. I mean like the the fucking that's like the worst chase. Uh talk about a chase like slow into a crawl, like a literal crawl. It was fucking boring. Also how does no one in that apartment building hear him clonking around in the metal tube or skateboarding in the with a metal tube?

I d I don't know. But but they hear his little tap tap tap with his fucking knife on a ball. Knife on a ball bearing, yeah. But they yeah, you don't hear him s slipping and sliding around in that motherfucker?

It is cra so okay, this movie starts pretty wildly where you're like Oh, you already know who the fucking creep is, who the killer is. He's up to some dastardly shit'cause there's a fucking chick and a With a shaved head and and a cage, yeah. All c scaly. And then another chick coming in and getting

Fucking sod, right? Like she gets like a saw trap going on. Yeah, uh a booby trap that shoots. She's got Kevin McAllister. Yeah. Like right out the gate. Picked up off the just hanging by a spike. Yeah.

In the attic. So th that's like the first three minutes of the movie. And he's like, Oh yeah, the woman, you can't say nothing to me. You're in the cage. You I cut you I have your tongue in a jar over there. Yep. And then he's like, Okay, well I killed the girl in the attic. Uh so I'm now gonna go do Russian roulette. And then uh like everyone's he feels bad, so he's gotta like pull the Russian roulette. After every murder. Yeah.

Where he's like, Oh, if God wants me to keep murdering, then he'll he'll let me live. So be it. So be it. So every time he He gets a click, so he's like, so be it. And when when this scene came around, I could have sworn I have this crazy deja vu. Did we watch this back in the fucking day, like twenty years ago, Josh at your house? I have just a weird recollection of watching this

scene with you somehow. Huh. I don't know. I just uh just a weird I wonder if it was like in one of those like tear in the aisle. I was gonna say was it eighty six was tear was well eighty one was tearing the aisle so it had to be Or eighty two maybe. It had to be it wouldn't have made it there. But maybe one some other like highlight reel that you'd seen, you know, or something. I don't know. I just have a weird recollection of w of seeing parts of this.

Could have been in a dock of some sort. I don't know. I never I've never seen it. Well, there's a part that popped up for me where I knew I had not seen it, but a another musical

thing popped up for me. Oh yeah, do too. I was like, it got to the end of the movie when he hits the fucking film, and I have it queued up here because I was like Oh, this sounds f uh like I'm hearing the sound of the film. Wait, the like Hitler film? The Hitler film? And uh I don't listen to racist music, guys.

Generally I don't listen to racist music. And y unless it's racist against Whitey, and then I'm actually for it. Sure. But I don't necessarily listen to to music that's um made by bad people. There's some exceptions. This is not one of them, although it might be. Where's this going? This is a song off one of my favorite fucking records. What is your own comrades? I had my own joy. Neuroses. Oh. But they're like, are they racist?

No. Really? They're not racist, no. Okay. They're from the Bay Area. They they got Scott Kelly got themselves canceled because he's a fucking abusive dick. Okay. Bad to his family. N not a racist man. They're not racist people. But what's up with that then?

It's just a dark ass weird thing. Klaus Kinski saying some cool ass sound and shit. It's from Neurosis's Souls at Zero, which is my favorite Neurosis record, and it's off the web and it's a song I listen to a million times. And as soon as I even hear the

Whatever, I'll do comrade. I was like, oh wow. This is I said, Oh, this is the same film that I've heard at the beginning of that Neurosis record. And then I heard the thing, him say the thing. I'm like, oh wow, okay, they just took it. Crazy. That's great. I could have definitely done completely without the Nazi shit. And I don't think it would have affected the movie in the slightest. For sure. Right. Yeah. There's not a single part that would would have been affected by it not being in there.

The eighties were fascinated with fucking Nazi shit. But also it's fucking weird. Like, okay, if that's just an easy way to make a villain, you know? Just Right. Yeah. Oh, they're extra evil, they're Nazi. Right. But like also like okay, so then but they're everyone you're killing Isn't like Jewish and or No, it has nothing to do with the kids. Yeah. But you're still putting swazzy on his fucking face with like a sharpie? Yeah, you might have lost it, dude. You think? You might have grayed it.

Oh well I'm surprised. Before after the lipstick, right? I I love that part. Oh smart with lip smear I love a smeared lipstick on a dude with the eyeliner. I looks great. His face? His fucking wacky face. I love it. Please someone just make that a mask for me to wear. I love it. Just exaggerate it like spitting image style where it's just all lips, eyes, and nose. His face is so short.

And I t I'm I'm a short faced man. So I I understand it. I've actually I was I always thought I had a huge forehead. Turns out it's got a real short ass face. Oh dog. I'm just telling you. That's how big my face is y'all. For for you listening, it's two and a half inches. It's I got a two and a half inch face. I'm the man with a two and a half inch face.

But he's got he's got a squished ass face. Yeah. And it's a lot of forehead. A lot of meat in there. Yeah. He's got a yeah, it's a lot of flaps. And he's kinda toothy.

It's kinda toothy. Oh yeah. Fully fully toothy. Tim and the Buuse got that good to go. I mean, you have those kind of teeth and you just gotta live in the walls. You have to. You have to by law. Yeah. Well'cause you're already walled in by your teeth'cause they're so huge You you you need that security. I feel like if you were to if you was sitting in in your crawl space, like and you could y the teeth would be like She Yeah glowing like sea again. Cartoon style. Yeah. Yeah.

What is he peeping on? People kept n recognizing him, so probably was happening. People I always like, what the fuck's going on in that I know you definitely think you see like his fucking eyeballs and teeth through all that shit, but like Or his heavy breathing. But no. I know. Or can clomping around in the metal. Or skating around in the metal.

Right. Amazing. Seriously, if I I've heard like you hear a mouse up on one of those things, it's yeah, it's like amplified. A mouse squeak, and yet he's tromping around in there. Clicking fucking switch blades on on balls. But so he's yeah, he's jumping down into it to get into it. Jumping down. Yeah. Unlike most people though that peep like that.

He's not seeming to get any sexual gratification from it. I don't think it's a good thing. No, he's just kind of a rascal. He likes to fuck with people. Yeah, he's a little remote control setting a rat out to scare the girls. No. Well you get to they get to see him jump around and scream. It's but like what if you like just look over there and there's a trapdoor that's going with red light and the someone pro like opening a cage and letting a rat out like dog

That is not a natural mouse hole. I think it's time to move. Yeah. I've seen Tom and Jerry and that looks nothing like what I'm saying. That's some Ren and Stimpy shit right there. Exactly. And then it's just like why'd you put a red l yeah, that's gonna People are gonna notice. Yeah. I mean I they did it for our benefit, but like practically not smart. You're vacuuming, you're like, what are these lines right here for the what's going on here? And he's got l all contraptions for dates.

Uh like how has he been able I don't know. I'm like, how has he been able to do this for so long? How many like people has he disappeared that just like Where like I want to know more about what's his story with Martha. Like I want to know Martha's deal. Like why'd he decide to keep her besides to listen to him? But like what like what why? Who knows?

I mean why yeah, why does he keep her and not everybody else? Where does he put the bodies? Yeah, I didn't see him dispose of any bodies. We see little parts of bodies. See a fingy, see some eyeballs, see a tongue from her.

But that's also new because he's only got a tongue to w at the start of the movie. Yeah. By the end of the movie he's got a a finger with a sweet ring on it and a fucking set of eyeballs. Some balls, yeah. Well the eyeballs were fucking Hank fucking shoemaker or whatever his name is. Paid the peeper. That's a crazy king. You know, just like Pr you know, just ha go in and have like some rape fantasy. Oh, that's very common. See that's I I'd seen it w the once before when we when we did curtains.

In the beginning of curtains it's got that thing where you're like, oh that's a lot of people like to get scared before they get aroused or the scared helps them get aroused, right? But it's how it's working for Tane Kane. Yeah, I don't know. Uh like the guy the the guy seems like a shit bird.

For like Yeah, well he's a real brickhead. Like he like he's a he's a prick and then he also like he obviously can't do anything. He's like not you know, not finishing the job, not getting the job done. Well, he's getting his own job done. No, he didn't even get his own job done. Oh yeah, he failed on both counts. Yeah. That guy's a dub. So next next

But that all of a sudden I was like, oh, we were about to watch this porno here. Right, yeah. Just porn pornographic material just right out the game. Yeah, just like a whole lot of porno type. And uh, you know. I knew I knew it was like, oh, this is why Josh picked this. Nipples and music. Dog. It exactly was. It exactly was that. I looked this movie up because she was in it. Yeah. Yeah. And I'm I like this record. Right on. And it has nothing to do with there's no

She also did another more Tane stuff. She recorded and sang on three songs from the original Terminator soundtrack. Oh, really? As Tane and the fucking uh Tingleberries or something like that. Something and the Terminators. Tony and the Terminators. But so she's she's got some cred, some horror cred. And I was like, I need to check, I need to see how she acts. She acts like a dang fool.

But I also I you don't see anybody's deaths except the first girl. You just see their bodies turn up. And like really stupid stuff too, where I'm like, Okay, you're this master, you got all these cool Contraptions you're making, you're the smart medical doctor, uh all the stuff. Fucking like clamps? Like just regular fucking old clamps?

Like what like yeah, classic. What do you think he's gonna uh reinvent the wheel here? This will work in this working since v you know, like Inquisition times. Yeah, well yeah, but like The found the screws. Yeah, but it's like w come on. I mean also like you're he's like Now you meet the rat. Yeah, so what? She met the rats. They didn't nothing. They're in her house.

Yeah. Like they didn't no one cares about the rats. The rats are in here and it's like, no, you're the rat. Right. Get these fucking actual rats out of here. Yeah, what's what's his what's the point? Just to spook'em a little bit? Yeah. Before before he kills him? Also Definitely when he's fucking rolling around his skateboard in there, how many of those things is he mowing down? Yeah, blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. Oh yeah, he pulled the head off that rat while he's gonna funsies.

Great. It's a pff. Squish it up there. You can't see shit anyways. I got an invisibility cloak on. You can't see anything. Seriously. What? But what about Like i just go like Hannibal Re lector style. Like cut s the top of someone's dome off and then feed'em they brains. Yeah. Or something. I mean something scientific. I don't know, you're scientifically. Yeah, do something if you're gonna experiment because you're the son of a Nazi doctor.

'Cause he's talking about experiments. I didn't say a fucking one. Nope. Nobody Plenty of contraptions though. He's an inventor. Booty spikes. And and tell me, dude, tell me that He's a prankster. The booty spike's sick, by the way. Booty Spike was insane. That was insane. Because also that dude booty spiked himself.

Yeah. Like that's amazing. Like that's a rad trapper. You're gonna just You played yourself, yeah. Yeah, dude. Straight fucking ooh. But also I think like he might a lived for a little while. Oh, you're gonna live for a little while. Also with a mess. That didn't go through your heart. The mess. The cleanup. Maybe he's got a really low heart. Yeah, I don't know how it didn't look like the spike went up that high. It definitely went up high enough that you are not.

No longer well. It perforated every organ. Yeah. And you're gonna be like, oh no, hell. Help me now. Call an ambulance. Something went up my ass and around the corner. And it just it just like fluids pouring up. I'm dumping. I'm I hope there's a tray or some kind of a oil. Can or something down there. That's when you should have seen the yeah, the bowl. It's a fucking old coffee can. Folgers can

Also like I can't believe this trap worked though. You just had a couple of fucking balls clanking around and that was enough to get the guy in there. Yeah for the guy that's trying to fucking What if the guy uh stood up with his hands up behind and walked away? Yeah. Not hit the thing. And if that guy's trying to sneak in and like look at a confession like put your cigarette out, way the fuck out the door, don't Just make yourself at home. You know that guy's a murderer, right?

You could read it. You're insane as much. You can stand the table. You call him that to his face. Yeah. If you think someone's a murderer and you're like, You're a murderer and I'm gonna catch you I'm gonna prove it. What do you think is gonna happen to you? What do you think's coming for you? Yeah. Yeah. That's essentially playing Russian roulette. Yeah. Right there. So be it. Yeah. You know, if if dude's a murderer and you call him out

You're getting murdered. With the door closed. What are you thinking? You don't go and sit down at his house and make yourself a home fucking I'm gonna hang out until he comes home again and see what happens. I'll tell you you know what happens? You got a f a spike up your butt. Yeah. And you went like ow and then you died. Like I feel like you would have been vocal. Yeah, I know. Like no one no one else in the whole apartment complex hears. Although I... In their defense.

This is the same apartment building from Trolls. And there was hella weird shit happening in Torrell. Whole forests of creatures that no one noticed the sounds of the thing. Sonny Bono turned into a fucking grove. Living right next door or anything. So there's some good fucking sound uh proofing and yeah, I mean he built that huge fucking

thing for him to crawl around and he probably put up some walls, uh soundproof yeah, double. Double drywall. Green goo. Yeah. Yeah. He you know, he's looking out. I mean, but it's a sh it's like definitely um inspired by uh H. H. Holmes. It's like this weird fucking like trapdoor house.

I thought that in his apartment there was like an attic and then in that attic was the crazy weird medical room with all of the shit where he crawls into the crawl space, where he keeps Martha, where he makes his little things. But it's just the top apartment? Well But the up s up up up apartment,'cause she runs up there, all the way to the top, opens the door, it's that apartment. Okay, yeah. And it's got two entrances for the crawl space. There's one Yeah, it's like two sides, right?

I guess there's a slide. I thought it was just around to that same one. She comes out the same way she came in. That's true. That's true. But didn't she come up in like or is it all It's all up, same thing? It's all the same room. So there's only one entrance of the crawl space. But this and fucking hey wait wait a minute. How come he doesn't go down a slide at any point?

I guess you go down You would be thinking that, right?'Cause it would have to go down Yeah,'cause they're not all in the same level. No. It's three levels. There's those weird like side parts where the one chick at the end, like she takes a a side, you know, quest

But for whatever reason he's like, Oh, she went this way. He like knew she went that way. There's like three of'em, like. Uh yeah he's intuitive. Yeah, I'm sure I mean he's a creep. He's he s smells people. Sniffs their fear. Uh How terrifying though? You're that woman You're already done the whole circle.

You're coming out, you know he's in there coming after you, but you hear something weird and you turn around and you see him and his fucking short face coming at you. Oh yeah. Full Around the corner with the full on the wheels. Yeah. What's the what's the bobsled? thing is it luge. Face first though, what's that? Yeah. Fucking Klaus Luge. Kill me now.

It's pretty scary. I was ex- I was like, okay, yeah, show it to me. She could turn around so slow. I'm like, you need to turn faster. He's coming fast. Her she was definitely like lagging. I'm like, you are not even you're acting like This is fun. You're like hanging out in here fucking clumping around like you're fucking John McClain or some shit. Like

I fucking like that. I liked a lot of elements of the movie. It I mean it is it doesn't have anything supernatural, which I was like I I was bummed that I picked something that wasn't my hundred percent flav. But And I didn't know it was a bann movie. I didn't know it was the same place as Troll, but now I totally see it. Yep.

Harry Potter original Harry Potter's original house. Same complex, same apartment complex. Which I was like, that's cool. That's probably the closest thing. That's cool. It's see. I love troll, so I know you love troll and I I love troll myself. I love a Phil Fondicaro. Yeah.

But put him in the fucking vent. He could stand up and walk around the vent. How come Phil didn't live Phil should have just lived at Empire Pictures and just been in everything? Dude. He was yeah, he's in a bunch, but it wasn't in enough. And the fact that we found out that he's a twin is amazing. Oh my gosh. Yeah. But you know what? Thank God for fucking Empire and and Full Moon,'cause they employ so many little people. It's true.

Like bless'em. Mm-hmm. I talk a lot of shit on Empire and Full Moon, but bless'em. Yeah, they hired Klaus. Yeah. He's little again, they made that movie with a bunch of little people playing universal monsters and here for it. But no one else was gonna make that movie. Is it the creeps? I think it's the creeps. Yeah, I think so. I'm looking right at it. It's the creeps. Oh it's so good. It's so fucky well

It's a movie. We like it. I like it. Is it a is it a saying it's good is is That's a full moon picture, isn't it? Yeah. It's well it's Adderant Empire, but it's definitely that. Okay.

But yeah, I mean it's not good, Josh. It's not not altogether bad either. I know. When I when I turned it on, I was like, wait, is this Are we starting in the m like I was totally thrown off because it jumps in and I'm like, Oh, did this movie start in the middle of the movie or something? Or the end? Like I try to like rewind it and realize it was the beginning. And I looked at the runtime and I was like, Oh it's a min it's a hour and eleven minutes sweet.

It's nice and short. It's gonna be bad, at least be short. Exactly. Yeah. I like a short one. Yeah. You know? Give it to me short. I'm talking about penises. And faces. And faces. And movies. You don't like them long boobies? Uh oh I I saidn't say boobies, I said movies but No, I thought you said boobies. I do I like a long boob too. I like a a mall, it doesn't matter.

I thought you said you like short boobies. So I said I got boobies on the brain, sorry. I understand. I do like I d my favorite thing, even though I didn't like her the way they revealed the kill, but

thing where he's got a tape recorder playing her singing and playing the P. And he's recorded prior. Yeah. And she's just singing a and then sh the yeah, sh the her the lady who the newest move in uh runs in there. How fucking creepy is Cause she knows now'cause homeboy was at her house being like You know, classes of creep.

Gunther is a creep. Gunther. God gunther. Mr. Gunther without gunt. Exactly. Doctor Gunt. Doctor Gunt to you. Doctor Gunt if you're nasty. And he is. He's nasty. But when she like Is there and then she looks out and he's just full there's not you can't call it peeping. He's looking in the window at her. Oh, he's just he's just like, I am here. Yeah. Peeping you have to do a little bit of hiding. Yeah.

He's just he's just like f right up to the window. Just clacking the fucking balls. Yeah, she's running around into every everybody's apartment. Everyone's dead. And he just keeps looking. But he's outside still. And I'm like, what a fucking creep, dude. This guy is such a fucking creep. But like what Anyways, the Gar Tanes. Reveal was sick. I like I think that was dope. The other gal who had some weird fucking candy sweet tooth? Yeah, sweet tooth lady who had a weird h like hick accent.

But her she just comes shooting out of her house on a fucking On a I don't know Murphy bed or something. What the fuck was that? Always with the s swastika and like Sharpie. Bad, like I'm like, what?

Yeah.'Cause you know, all the effects were done by fucking our boy Beek. The Beak clear was in there. Oh, was he up in this? Yeah, he did all the special effects stuff. I think he might have supervised that. And I'm like, was Beek sitting there drawing a fucking swazi on all these people? Sharpie, all bad.

Yeah. Every everyone ever all those look dumb. Like on my cheek? At least homie had it in the forehead like Manson style. That's like the best one. If you're gonna do it, carve it. Right. But like Don't do it at all. Can you leave that out, please? And how is that bathtub not completely bloody from dude's ain penetration? It's all on the fucking carpet, hey, it's Gunther's house. It's ankle deep in Gunther's apartment. Would you guys think of his fake out death?

Do you guys like that? I called it. I called that shit. Oh, he shows that thing earlier. Yeah. And you're like, what is that thing for but that? Exactly. And then you didn't see him die, I'm like you didn't even see it it happen. Yeah, but you see him there all, I'm dead. You see him go, Oh and then they're round the corner and he's like, I'm dead.

I knew it. I'm like this guy's just playing with everybody faking it. But yeah, he had all the fucking all the doors locked, everything fucking shut, they're trapped, like all that shit. I enjoyed the the Russian roulette gun finally doing it. Yeah. Took long enough though. I was like, come on, pull the trigger. I couldn't think I couldn't have been luckier. Holy shit. You know, right? Yeah.

He he would have never actually stopped. I like the was it the last one he we where he was like p oh he's like okay so puts it on the table and he's like grabs it again real quick and clicks and That was the second that was the second one or the third one we saw. Yeah, the s the very last one. He did three. Click, click, click. Uh-huh. He was saying he's he doesn't care. There's no God. Exactly. God would have ended that so early, so many years ago. No, he deserves another chance.

Doctor Gunt is is when he did some good in this time. Yeah. Maybe he's just

No, come on, Dr. Gunt. I made you in my image. God looks just like Klaus Kinski. Oh, that's why he has that attitude if he acts like that. They'll fist fight you for no reason. Oh. Fist fighting kids, fist fighting just people countries. I saw him I saw him at he was like doing like a press junket.

He's at a table with a microphone. I believe it's his it it's either his co-star or his lady, who's much younger than him, and she's sitting there with a just a dumb smile on her face. He starts losing his mind. Shoots up, throws some shit at the fucking paparazzi. Starts yelling at them. Uh and then grabs her by the arm and yanks her up the whole time she's smiling and fine with it.

And they like take off and it's just like, this guy is a fucking madman. He's a menace, dude. He is like I like gotten this whole hole where I'm just looking at him being a bad man. See? It's it's it's it's kind of a similar reason why

I'm not gonna say I like Vincent Gallo. I'm not gonna say that I do. Speaking of bad men, yes. He's a bad man. I like Buffalo sixty six. Sure. That's about it. Got one of those faces. Probably hates directors and fist fight your ass. He does. And he but he most assuredly is a racist.

Oh and a bad, bad guy. And a bad dude. And a yeah, full chauvinist. And I made a couple amazing records though. I liked his music too. I love his music. It's so sweet. Yeah. It's like the sweetest music. Yeah. I haven't listened to it in a while. But I don't listen to it very often. I don't listen to it anymore. I don't listen to R. Kelly either. But also That guy makes amazing music. I'm sorry.

Bad guy. Yeah. Yeah. I don't listen to it anymore. Dude, if you drink that much pea, you're gonna make good music. That's that's the sauce. That's the secret secret. That's what it is. These guys drink it. I get it. I've been drinking water this whole time and beers blowing it. Secret sauce. You guys need to piss it all?'Cause I need to get money from art. What if that was like the secret sauce? You just like have to drink pee?

What? Give it to me. Pour me pour me a tall one. A tall floppy. Make it a hazy. Oh god.

Yeah. I don't do as much Instagram as I used to, but I give myself like a fifteen minute daily limit. One thing scrolled past the other day, it was just a woman drinking it says like Aged urine. And it was green, dog.

And she drank a full I don't know if it was real, I don't know if it's two girls, one cup thing, whereas she's just drinking a fucking milkshake. Have you ever stumbled upon like a jug in the woods that's just peed it's been marinating? Yeah, and well it's it's also crystallizing and dehydrating so it's It's a lot less cool. Cooking down. Yeah. But but but when you throw it and it explodes and the stench When you throw it uh I would like to say I would like to submit a story.

And I may have told this story before'cause we've been doing this for thirteen years or whatever. So I apologize if you've heard this one before. Stop me if you have heard this one before. But there was once where I was on tour with my band and they're talking nineteen ninety nine, I think. Three bands on tour. One band from New Jersey called Lane Meyer, one band from Chicago called the Lawrence Arms, and my band The Wonder Years are on tour.

We get to know each other pretty well over those six weeks or whatever. And um we were um we would just kind of prank each other on the daily, like and it was stuff fun things like putting your rival band stickers on your van or whatever, just like stupid shit like that. And once we The and and the other band, La Lawrence Humps had a really nice V C R and T V in their van. And we were uh disgusting and we were pissing in bottles. And we pissed in this huge Gatorade jug.

And and there was also a woman in our band, so I apologize right now to her. And I should have done it in the nineties. But anyway, so we're pissing in this jug and then and we thought it would be funny to like had one of those kudos bars, like a granola bar, and just dropped it in the whole job. So it's like a huge chocolate bar floating in an actual bottle filled to the brim with piss. And we tightened the lid and we wrote a note on it.

And taped it to it that said, You guys might have a fancy T V in your van, but we have a toilet in ours and we rolled it into the Lauren's arms van. Oh, they're gonna see this thing. Yeah. And hope at no point will this thing be open, because hell no. And they didn't open it in their van, but they suspected the other band of it, and on the freeway they found it. And they leaned out and we were all caravanning. Uh so we saw it happen. It was we us in the back.

Lane Meyer next and then Lauren Sims ahead. Brendan Kelly leans out of the fucking van with this thing and just threw it right at the windshield of Lane Meyer's and it exploded. Granola, chocolate, and urine. And that van fucking stunk. Dude.

It was great. And that wasn't even that old. That wouldn't have been that old. That would have been a couple of days or a week or something. Accumulating. I don't think. In nineteen ninety nine, I didn't have a drop of water. And neither did anybody else in my band. And we definitely were drinking lots of ooze.

Yeah. Red Bulls. That was a Red Bull years. You know that shit was Sy Sirup. Yeah. The most golden of gold. Yeah. It was like it was like Red Bull, except you know how Red Bull's like sweet? It's like the opposite of that. It's like just this I don't feel so hot talking about it actually. I feel bad. No, old P man is the worst. It's the fucking worst.

And I've definitely smelt it too many times. I don't like it. And and th and or thrown it. I've thrown it too many times. That's why I've smelled it too many times. Jugged on me. Piss jugs, man. That's the thing. Old anything. You ever tipped over a porta potty? Oh.

That shit you'll never forget the smell of that. I don't stink up a whole neighborhood. I won't even go into a porta potty when I know it's not tipped over and when it's just a normal porta potty. It's like they just stench just dropped it off. Yeah. The blue liquid is enough to keep me f far away from any porta body. Sometimes you gotta though. I don't gotta Go to the doctor and we can have to get it fucking surgically removed. Oh my god.

Fuck. Man, I you know I am glad it was short. Yeah. I didn't The Nazi shit was a bummer. I didn't hate it all, but the Nazi shit I hated And then just learning about how much of a shithead he was afterwards, I was just like, What the fuck, man? Like I need to do. But if you want a creep for a movie, you don't have to do he doesn't have to do anything. He just he's a creep. He's just a creep. I was really bummed to see that he died in nineteen ninety one because I was like

This guy's still gotta be around, right? Doing creepy shit? No, God smited his ass and fucking took him home. Five years after this movie. Yeah, that's wild. But I mean, uh yeah, come on. Living that way, you don't got along. I feel like he didn't do a whole lot of I mean, I might be wrong. I'm sure he did a lot of German movies. He did something like two hundred movies or a hundred and fifty something crazy. But I wonder if like he like

He's d he had his I mean the eighties everyone was doing bad movies. Like Max on Saido was doing, you know, fucking Strange Brew. Right. Good movie. I love it. Also a bad movie. But also but for him for a dumb movie. For for a master actor. For a guy who was in like the seventh seal, like you think maybe that's but I wonder if Klaus, besides Werner Herzog, did other like renowned great classic movies like in the sixties or something. Probably.

Was he always just a B actor? At what point well yeah, like at what point do you are a B actor and you become Thinking that you're an A actor enough that you don't need to be a big thing. But act like a B. Yeah, act like a C. Like you're a C actor. He's a yeah, he's on the D list of total dicks. Fuck it. It's it's just crazy to me that you could act that way and still get hired for a job.'Cause like it wasn't like Yeah, you were so difficult. Why would everyone want to deal with that?

Like literally they hired like the you know, the director was like, Okay, cool, this is my movie, we're gonna do this thing. They'd hired Klaus and he's like, Oh, I'm gonna l you know, I wanna like learn about him before I meet up with him and stuff.

And then where'd you gonna go on the internet? It's nineteen eighty six, baby. No, that's not a good thing. So this might be why r directors meet their cast like in advance now. Like have a little meet and greet, little get to know you. No th I think the his his like agent was just like Oh, you haven't read the the Playboy interview that just came out? You should probably read that. And that's when he's like, I'm fucked.

Because his agent's probably his agent's probably in the same boat as all the directors. Like I don't I hate agents. Yeah. They're always like, Hey, you're gonna work for a living Fuck you, Klaus. I love it. Yeah. I he's I I hope that I mean, I know he's a bad guy, but I hope he was like Not the worst guy. Ooh, I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. He got what he deserved, let's say that. Well

I mean he'd but what he did just die of natural cause. I don't know. Or he gets slapped so hard that he died. I don't know. In ninety one he got what he deserved. God damn. Jeez. Brian watches a eight minute documentary and Knows all about it. They were literally to like the director was like, We were literally talking about killing him for the insurance money. Like straight up

actually killing him. That's why it's called Please Kill Mr. King. Oh my god. And the and then eventually it became this thing where the cast was like whispering it and not around him. Then it became to the point where he was so bad and they couldn't do anything with him where the cast and crew were like Please kill Mr. Kinskey right now. Oh my god. Please kill him. He did a sequel to Nasferatu. Vampire in Venice. What?

Yeah. Yes for Otto. I read somewhere that his daughter accused him of some sexual Really? I'm not surprised. He's a bad guy. I'm not surprised. He's the worst guy. I'll take it back. He's the worst guy. Is that his daughter I saw in that fucking junket that he ripped out of the chair and was like I don't know. I don't know. I should go Well now I'm fascinated. I kinda wanna watch all these fucking docs about how shitty he is. Definitely watch the little eight minute shitty one. It's on YouTube.

Just called Please call Please Kill Mr. Akinski. And it's horrible. It's the worst. Like the director like did not try to make it. Like it's not like well made, but it's like it has clips from them making the movies. And it has him talking about it. and um just about how horrible the experience was. That sounds fascinating. And it Well thank you Josh for uh picking this. Appreciate it.

I what about this? What uh what about it? See time stalkers? It's another one of these crawl spaces with the two it's got look at'em. Peeping? Yeah, he's peeping through a TV and I thought that was I thought that was Rick Moranis, but it's not. I have a feeling that in real life he was a peeper. You feel like he's he just naturally? Peeper Creeper Creeper Peeper. Yeah. Definitely.

I think the eighties was prime peeping too. Oh, it was okay back then. I know, right. It's in every fucking movie. Every movie. Some dude peeping through a window at some some chicks in their bras. Every person writing a movie is like, We need a peeper in this. You better have a peeper. Yeah.

Back to the future. Just like just like we did. Just like why make America peep again. Harm of a little peep. We're just looking. Just having a little peep just peep. What is it what harm does it do a peep? And like is it is it More acceptable to peep and not jerk off than it is to peep and rip a head off a rat. Like what what's more accepted? I think The rat? Save the rats. I I mean no comp as an animal rights person, save the rats. Yeah.

But you should be jerking it either, so I I think I know the answer to that. Shh you and it's it's my little secret. I am not a peeper, but if I'm walking down the street and it's nighttime and your well-lit window's wide open, I'm gonna look in it. I'm not gonna stop and look in it. But I'm gonna turn my head. I'm gonna see what you're watching not watch the road. I'm gonna see what's on T V. I'm gonna see if you're doing anything lascivious. And if may you are.

I might circle the block. I won't stop. Will not stop. I mean if you're pacing back and forth and not stopping, is it peeping? That's a lesson. Is it even peeping if you're yeah if you can't if you're moving the whole time? I'm taking a walk. At what point is it peeping? Is it peeping only when you stop? But you have to be how close to the window. Say if you're right outside the window but you're circ you're making a s a continuous circle and your head just spinning Let's try.

There's tracking. Yeah. Is that is that still peeping? Oh, you know, yeah, like it's like the reverse exorcist where you're like your head's looking the window but your body's spinning around. Your body's moving around, yeah. Yeah. But you you didn't stop. If you don't stop, it's not beeping. If you're if I'm not in your yard, if I'm at the at the on the public space I'm in a public plane in your window. I didn't stop. Yeah. But then I stopped. You're still on public

You're still on a public uh fairway. This is all theoretical. Yes. Well I mean I guess what happens when you're in your house and you're peeping the neighbor? Is that okay? You're still in your house. If you're rear windowing it? Yeah, looking out your window. Are you a peeper? If you're hiding it, right? If you're just like

Pop the curtains open and stand there in your underwear. I have a peeping question, a technicality for peeping question. If you are Say at your stepdad's house in San Francisco and your You're on a hill and you have a telescope you have a telescope. This is all hypothetical. Hypothetically Hypothetically. And you have a telescope and you can look right into someone's apartment window. Yeah.

And for as long as you like. If that if that were if those circumstances If that was a circumstance, is it peeping if you keep your light on? Or is it certainly peeping if you turn your light off? Which are both peeping Or is it just light off peeping? I it's weird with a a telescope because it's like you could be Far away, very far away.

I know I peeped the moon one time. I'm sorry guys. I looked. You saw the moon all naked? I saw the moon. You had the light off bare moon. Every cranny. Every nook. Every cranny, every crater. Fuck. But like you could theoretically, depending on the fucking the power of the telescope, uh you could be pretty far away. So at what point is it peeping And it what uh like

I don't understand. We've discussed this. And I'll tell you this before we've discussed it because if the t if the angle of the telescope goes below the horizon ninety degrees, you go to jail. It calls the police for you. That's right. That's right. So you only can do it if you live if you point towards the sky. Yeah. And if if if you're on the bottom floor looking up at a a three story building. You can peep up if there's people in the

Fully peep up. No peeping down. Peep up is is acceptable. Uh you peepers that know and call in and let us know. The number is Shit, I'll just call my daddy used to have a telescope he used to fucking peep with. I mean think how many people own p telescopes not for fucking looking at planets. Yeah, they don't give a fuck about a star. Yeah. Yeah, we know what they're doing. That's how I learned to peep. Right. That's what they're made for. Yep.

Seven oh seven. But mostly they were for peefish. Yeah, like Galileo straight up fucking just looking in a fucking house across the street. That was a sec that was a secondary market. That's that's how you like you you you sell vibrators as massagers, but they're really just for masturbating. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah. Yeah. It's just one of those kind of things. Like, yeah, you're looking at the stars, right?

Oh, the Milky Way, look at that. They just need a massage, a really fucking hard massage. A rough massage. I feel a tickle in my throat. Massage. If you wanna call us and let us know the technicalities of what's peeping and what's not. Yeah. Yeah. You professional peepers out there. Yeah, let us know. Seven oh seven three two seven two nine eight four. Let us know the illegalities in your uh town, city or state or country. Yeah. Because

You know, if we're traveling, maybe it's legal to peep in some places. Yeah, we'll accept the charges, you fucking convicted peepers. Just let us know. I don't know, is it c is it in Can Canada? Is it legal? Maybe legal to peep in Canada. I think it's'cause hypothetically one time I mean hypothetical. I love a hypothetical. Well you just looked out of your window I was on tour with some bands. Mm-hmm. And and this is Montreal. Imagine imagine this.

Imagine if say let's say for instance Have I talked about this already? Oh yeah. On here? Yeah yeah. Just do it again. We're gonna go to the right. Some people haven't heard it? Yeah. Okay, so hypothetically if I'm Uh leaving the club with some folks and going back to the house we're staying at, and it's hot, and I go outside. And I look down from the big, big patio that's stories high, and I look down and there's a car all fogged up moving. Mm-hmm.

There's definitely humping going on. Mm-hmm. Not necessarily peeping, but I am looking down at it. Allegedly. Allegedly. What can you see? Hypothetically. Like theoretically, what would you be able to see? Barely anything. Of ankle sticking out of a window. But you didn't look away. Not even that. Well, no, I mean like You see a car going buckada buckada buckada. You see a car rocking. Yeah. You know, and I'm like, oh

Hypothetically, there's probably people doing something in there. Maybe they're playing backgammon. I don't know. If you're full contact backgammon. Yeah. Dude, this probably cleaning. Try to get in the nooks and crannies. You gotta get in the backseat, you gotta get down. See if they need me help, you go wrap on the window, but first give it a good looky loo. It was all fogged up. You couldn't really see in the windows.

Well then you you then you open the door slightly and then you reach in and you wipe the fog and you grab a cheek and then you close it and you then you look. And so they turn around after the cheek grab and they see you going But yeah, you know, I was up I wasn't looking through a window. You were you were looking down. I was in a public spot. You're when you're right.

I was looking down into the alley and there's a car park there. That's not your fault. I think if people are fucking in public, you can watch them fuck. Okay. I mean, I mean some people they're exhibitionists, they prefer that. Yeah. They would they want you to watch them. You know. But I'm not I don't know the law. Yeah. I mean if you're watching people fucking public If hypothetically I wouldn't want to go to jail now for something that happened Twenty years ago in Montreal.

Because it never happened. I don't know. You know, and I don't know like yeah, the the statute of limitations for Montreal or For watching a car sh rock back and forth. Yeah. No. No. I didn't pull my member out hypothetically or anything. I didn't. I was just I believe you I just looked. Plus there's like five feet away from me, there's like people hanging out, you know? Looking. I believe it. Yeah, I didn't think at some point some like

Au revoir I believe like a couple of minutes later somebody came out. I hadn't like you know, hypothetically it'd only been there for a minute. Somebody came out onto the patio. I might might not have told em that I was looking down there. Hypothetically. You might not have? Might not have. You kept it to yourself? Yeah. You just never said it into a microphone or anything? No, well now I've hypothetically I've been telling people but

Uh back then I yeah, it was just you know, it was like that's for you. That was just for you. That's me. Same kind of thing. Beautiful sight. I saved it for myself until I shared it with just you two. We appreciate it. Yeah. Yeah. We won't tell nobody. I appreciate you guys. But if it happened Right. Thanks for keeping your mouth shut. No problem. No problem.

On that note, If uh does the next record store have this record? If someone hypothetically wanted to get this record? I don't know if they do right now, but there's always a chance that they have hundreds and hundreds of used records. Ask for that tane cane.

You can I mean they ha I'd say there's a very good chance. I found a number of Sandy Stewart records there and I bought that Nightbird's Stevie Nicks record there. So what I just thought about though, your name what do you call her? Tane? Tane. And they're like the name the name of the album is Tane Kane. Uh huh. But there's also a Tane Kutane. Tane, yes.

Tony Katane was, I believe after this, made famous by Bachelor Party and the Whitesnake video. Right. But Tony Catane Tane Katane. Tane Cain. Tane Cain. Yeah. It's Wait, I get it now. So it's tane katane and tane katane. You just skipped a syllable. Yeah.

I'm just trying to help you remember. If you're at the next record store and you can't remember what the name of the album is, just remember Wait a loop it back. Yeah, I was trying to get into that uh sponsor th thing, but that's they might have the Tony Kane record, but I'll tell you what they you're gonna leave with something'cause they have amazing selections. Of new records, used records, CDs, cassettes.

We're talking about movies now. We have a little Forever Midnight section there you can check out. Yeah, Forever Midnight recommended picks for on DVDs and Blu-rays. Posters, t shirts, they got it all. Yeah. Josh is there on Wednesdays. I am. Come visit me on Wednesdays. I I love it. The address is eighteen ninety nine Mendocino Avenue in Santa Rosa, California. Yeah, so if you come into town and you're gonna go hit that place up, if you're on a Wednesday, you're lucky.

But if you're also coming in and not on on a Wednesday, hit us up. We'll meet you there. We'll meet you there. It's a great place to to hang out. So yeah, check it out. Thenextrecordstore.com. if you're uh shopping online, which if you're gonna get a record online, please do it there instead of anywhere else. It's it's the move. Because you get ten percent off if you put forever in at the checkout. Yeah. And just have them order you the

Tane Katane, Tony Katane album. Gotta have that Tane Katane. Yeah, Tane Katane, man. Tane Cane. Uh yeah, and we uh we love the next record store and we thank them for sponsoring the show so much. Yeah. And also Word Horde Emporium of the Weird and Fantastic. Yes. Uh in Petaluma, California at twenty two hundred Petaluma Boulevard North, Suite eight oh five, in the premium village outlets. Yeah. They have books and games and all kinds of I mean just rad stuff, pins.

And if you're like into stuffed animals or toys or all kinds of shit like that, they have all kinds of amazing stuff. Yeah. And the selection of books is off the charts. If you like horror, sci fi, fantasy, any of that stuff. True crime. Yeah. Yeah. If you can't get into Sonoma County and you wanna buy stuff and support them Hit them up at WeirdandFantastic.com and use discount code Midnight for ten percent off of your order, which you could also use at the brick and mortar at

store. And uh again, if you're coming into town and you're gonna go check them out, hit us up. We'll try to meet you there. Yeah, that'll be fun. Uh even if it's only one of us, we'll try to meet you there. So Yeah, yeah. Let us know. And we thank them so much for sponsoring the show. They're awesome people. Uh they can always find what you need if they don't have it in stock and you should support them, even if they weren't supporting us.

Support them. They're fucking great folks. Support independent record stores and bookstores, please. Hundred percent. Yeah. I love that our sponsors are like analog fucking. Let's so like Uh and we love both of them and they're so rad. Please support them and in turn that helps us out. Absolutely. It really does. If you want to see uh video podcast, we're doing that now over on our Patreon by the way. Yep. Plus exclusive episodes.

And this is a another way to uh support us directly. Yeah. All those exclusive episodes are gonna be video now and all of our regular episodes that we sh have on the regular channel are also video over on the Patreon. That's right. So check that out. Uh Patreon.com slash Forever Midnight. Yep. And also, this is new and I haven't really talked we haven't talked about it, but like not new because we used to do it, but we we haven't done it in a long, long time.

On YouTube now our podcasts are on there as well. So if you listen to podcasts, which a lot of people do on YouTube, uh you can listen to it. It's just the audio right now currently. There may eventually be video there, but for now the audio episodes are on YouTube as well. So like and subscribe. Smash that like button, buddy. Wait, yeah. Do I don't know how what are the kids saying? I don't know. Hypothetically, I don't know.

But uh yeah, we uh hope that you're listening to us on one of those platforms. Uh if you have a friend that only listens to them on YouTube, tell them about us, you know. Hopefully they could they'll check us out. Um, you know, we've been doing this for a long time. We have a lot of uh people that listen, but you know, you can always help us grow. Please do. Yeah, tell a friend and uh give us a review. That's always fun too. Definitely.

And we thank you all for listening. We thank our sponsors. We thank our patrons over at patreon.com slash Forever Midnight so much. Mm-hmm.

They are the people in our crawl space. The wheels on my crawl space cart. And uh yeah, we c we couldn't do it without them. And of course we thank all you regular listeners too and we hope that you're someday patrons. Yeah. It's not too late. Yeah. And you know, there's tiers over there that if you want to pick something for us to to watch.

You can do that and we have some of those coming down the pipes. We're gonna be having some uh new movies and coming down the vents. Yep. Uh lots of peeper movies lately. I kinda like I like a peeper movie. I you know I I I'm not peeping anymore these days. You're living vicariously. Yeah, I'm living vicariously through Klaus and Gary. Yeah, you gotta go rush revenge of the nerds when I get home. Yeah. Or Animal House. Or Back in the Future or or

Any number of fucking movies. Porkies. God, Porky's such paper movies. Peeping. My peeps. This is my peeps. That's what they mean when they say my peeps. Yeah. What's up? These are my peeps. They also peep with me. Just a bunch of eyes and holes. If you peep through a glory hole, is it the same? You're risking a dash a mashed eye. That's true. You're you're risking chlamydia in your gear. What it's dark in there. Boop Blunt. We need we need to watch that glory hole horror movie also.

It's called Glorious, but we should watch it. Yes. Maybe I'll pick it. I want to live it. I I do kinda think I know what's gonna happen in it. I don't know. It looks pretty wild what's gonna happen. So we'll see. I'm thinking I'd we love to hear what you think is gonna happen and then see what's gonna happen. Well I think uh well most assuredly someone's gonna lose their dick.

Oh. Oh. Don't you think? I don't know. It's only the uh I we shouldn't okay. Yeah. We should do it. I d I don't want to be positing I mean, that just seems well when I think of a glor a horror movie with a glory hole, someone's gonna get their dick removed. Yeah. This one's a little more ex existential, I think. Oh really? It's a thinking man's glory horror horror movie. Exactly. A book gets shoved through there. Or I just hold the book up through the hole and you gotta read it.

Do the whole. You gotta peep it. Yeah. Mm-hmm. That's how you that's That's the worst kind of peep. You don't want to peep a book. I know, right? That's the That's the that's the book end of the of the anthology horrors. They're reading the stories through a glory hole. Right. Yeah, yeah, the yeah. I like that. I like that, Josh. Hold on to that. Don't tell anyone. Hold on to that.

We don't want anyone to steal that. Yeah. For my glory horror movie I'm making. Glory horror Glory Hole anthology. Glory horror? Glory horror. We can't talk anymore. I think it's time to go. Thanks everybody for listening. We love you. Bye. See you next time. Research center. Staples recorded by Paul. and performed. Elliot Whitehurst, Paul.