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Football Ramble

The Football Ramble is a global podcasting institution. Since 2007, the Ramble has provided entertainment, analysis and coverage of the Premier League and beyond for football fans who don't take the world's biggest sport too seriously.


In 2026, the takes are as strong as ever, the jokes are as funny as ever and the Ramble remains as essential as it ever was for football fans everywhere. Join them throughout the week as they discuss the world's biggest football stories in their inimitable style.

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Episodes

Mailbag: How do we deal with football conspiracies?

Were the moon landings faked? Did aliens build the pyramids? Did Howard Webb intervene to get William Saliba sent off against Bournemouth? Philosophers and academics have long debated these events to find out the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. On today's Mailbag, Marcus, Luke and Andy explore football's growing conspiracy culture and find out what can be done about it. Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com . Sign up to the ...

Oct 26, 202448 min

The Preview Show: The Slot Factor

Death, taxes and Jose Mourinho getting sent off on a big European night. The Special One played the hits against Man United and today Marcus, Luke and Andy are here to enjoy the music. Elsewhere, Andy explains why Arsenal have a lot on the line when they play Liverpool on Sunday. But don’t worry, we learn that Mikel Arteta has stolen Mauricio Pochettino’s lemons. Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ...

Oct 25, 20241 hr

Ramble Reacts: Liverpool pass another test

Liverpool travelled to the Red Bull Arena and left with all three points. Naturally, Pete is wearing his Monster Energy hat to celebrate. Today, he’s joined by famous Carabao man Luke Moore to count how many times Loïs Openda was caught offside. Elsewhere, Man City play the hits with a 5-0 win against Sparta Prague and José Mourinho wants another Premier League medal. COME ON! Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com Sign up to the Football Rambl...

Oct 23, 202436 min

Haystacks Peace and the pesky prattling parrot

ASTON VILLA ARE TOP OF THE CHAMPIONS LEAGUE! Does that mean Emi Martínez gets a new trophy to hump? Today, Marcus, Andy, Jim and Vish commend Unai Emery for creating a team that looks comfortable among Europe’s best. Elsewhere, Mikel Arteta displays some more bizarre behaviour, a parrot gets a Spanish referee in trouble and Phil Neville wins his first trophy at Portland Timbers. Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com Sign up to the Football Ram...

Oct 23, 202445 min

Ramble Reacts: Crystal Palace’s woes continue

Grandad Roy, come and help Uncle Marc, would you? Nottingham Forest beat Crystal Palace 1-0 and continued their remarkable defensive record, all while Chris Wood plays like prime Christian Vieri. But why is it all going wrong in south London? And can anyone tell Eze to stop shooting all the time? Marcus and Vish react to the Monday night football! Plus, the FA formally seek clarification that Gary O’Neil did indeed call them k***heads. Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us...

Oct 21, 202427 min

Battle of the little boys

Arne Slot’s lot are still top of the table! Marcus, Luke, Vish and Pete talk through a pulsating Sunday afternoon showdown with Chelsea – but thankfully Pete won’t be revealing “everything that’s in his head”. One thing Vish reveals is his belief that Howard Webb should be completely naked if he sits in the stands at any Premier League game – for full transparency – after he caused a stir down in Bournemouth. Plus, Gary O’Neil wages war with little guys after Wolves concede a gutting late winner...

Oct 21, 202457 min

Mailbag: Do we need chaotic managers?

Right then, Tommy Tuchs has got the big job so now we wait for the inevitable chaos that trails in his path. It's going to be box office, but is the entertainment factor worth it? Marcus, Jim & Andy are here to debate whether it's time to bring back managerial double acts and which rules they reckon they could break if they played in the top flight. Plus, a nod to Alan Pardew. Lovely to get a mench in for Pards. Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@football...

Oct 19, 202430 min

The Preview Show: Give it Thomas Frank

The Barclays is back! Marcus, Andy, Jim and Pete are fizzing at the prospect of a goalmongous return when Spurs play West Ham in the Premier League tomorrow lunchtime. Elsewhere, Marcus accuses Pete of making up managerial rumours. Does he have a point? Or is Pete just in the know... Join the Football Ramble WhatsApp Channel: https://whatsapp.com/channel/0029VamKx7RL7UVMdlfanN0Q . Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com . Sign up to the Football...

Oct 18, 202451 min

Ramble Uncut: Jay Rayner and The Turbines

Today, we're bringing you a special teaser of what you can expect every week on the Football Ramble Patreon. For just $5 a month, you'll get an extended version of every Wednesday episode of the Ramble! It's called Ramble Uncut and it's full of all the stuff we would be talking about if football wasn't always getting in the way. You'll get correspondence from other Patreon subscribers, behind-the-scenes news and regular Pitbull updates. Just head to patreon.com/footballramble to subscribe! Find ...

Oct 17, 202425 min

My giddy aunt, it’s Thomas Tuchel!

“It’s difficult to believe, at this point, that the FA are in negotiations with Thomas Tuchel” - Luke Moore, 15th October 2024. Marcus, Luke and Jim are here to react to the news that Thomas Tuchel is the new England manager. Strap in… Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com . Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: https://www.patreon.com/footballramble . Join the Football Ramble WhatsApp Channel: https:/...

Oct 16, 202444 min

I do want the job, but I haven’t applied

It’s a Lions Watch takeover! Marcus and Luke cast their deciding votes on the future of the England managerial post: has Lee Carsley passed the job interview? Does he even want to pass the interview? Has he even submitted his CV for said interview? They look back on the international break and England's performances, answer your questions, and discuss reports of the FA considering both Thomas Tuchel and Pep Guardiola. According to Luke, one’s using the England job as a negotiation tactic and the...

Oct 15, 202444 min

You are not entertained

Who's more confused, Lee Carsley or Pete Donaldson? A question which is in itself so confusing that we're really confused trying to answer it. All we know is that England won yesterday and Marcus, Luke, Vish and Pete are here to try and make sense of it all. Elsewhere, Scotland didn’t win at the weekend but there is a new pizza named after Scott McTominay and Billy Gilmour, so that's a victory of sorts. But the real winner from the weekend is, of course, League One Manager of the Month Steve Bru...

Oct 14, 202454 min

Mailbag: How do we fix the international break?

It's the bloomin' weekend and luckily for you, it's full of Nations League excitement. Seriously though, the whole football calendar is an absolute mess. Marcus, Luke and Vish embark on the challenge of trying to fix the window, whilst also asking whether fans actually prefer boring football. Oh, and listener Charlie has a wedding conundrum that we're called into action for advice on. Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com . Sign up to the Foot...

Oct 12, 202432 min

The Preview Show: A confusing broth

Lee Carsley experimented with starting all the cooks for England and what transpired was one confusing broth. Today, Luke tells Marcus and Vish why England need a manager that is brave enough to drop some of England’s more talented players. Elsewhere, we celebrate Marcello Lippi’s birthday and is Ole Gunnar Solskjaer positioning himself to have another shot at the Man United job? We bloody hope so… Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com . Sign ...

Oct 11, 202458 min

Mama Marcus

Is that… a half fit Harry Kane trundling up the pitch? Oh YES! International football is back and England face Greece tonight! Marcus, Pete and Andy celebrate with wedding cake in the post (Marcus wishes), a sprinkling of David Beckham nostalgia, and some angry reviews of Andrés Iniesta’s vineyard to finish. Plus, Pete’s verdict on some wild fits in the French squad. Better than Harry Maguire’s ‘man accused of insider training’ chic, I suppose. Come join us! Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and...

Oct 10, 202446 min

Manchester City’s glove emporium

Manchester City laid the smallest of gloves on the Premier League this week. But what does it all mean? Today, Marcus and Andy crossover to our official legal reporter Pete Donaldson for some fascinating insight into this new development. Elsewhere, Jurgen Klopp has somehow found the energy for a new job - a case of Red Bull will do that for you - and Andy explains the real reason why Man United appointed Ruud van Nistelrooy as Erik ten Hag’s assistant. Plus, Fizzer’s boys are on the march! Find...

Oct 09, 202440 min

Introducing: The English Disease

This is a podcast we think you’re going to love. Our friends at Stak have made a unique six-part documentary about hooliganism in English football. For decades, it dominated headlines, merging the two things England loves most: football and fear. But football hooliganism didn’t disappear. This series digs deeper – beyond the tabloid articles, beyond the stereotypes – to understand what first attracts people to this subculture and why it’s forced its way back into our society in 2024. Today, you’...

Oct 09, 202439 min

Timmy ten Hag

Well, it looks like Erik Ten Hag has bought himself a bit of time following one of the dullest games the Premier League has ever seen. In other words, exactly what the big man needed. But in better news for the Dutchman, Ten Hag wasn't the biggest bald fraud at Villa Park on Sunday. Nope, that honour would go to his ballboy doppelgänger who we're calling Timmy (what's a grown man doing in that role anyway?). Marcus, Jim and Pete are here to dissect all the rest of the Premier League action befor...

Oct 08, 202438 min

Andy Carroll for England

Is it Tottenham’s fault that people call 2-0 a dangerous scoreline? Today, even Jim admits to Marcus and Pete that he has some sympathy for Spurs fans after they gave up a 2-0 lead against Brighton. Elsewhere, Adama Traoré gets the Nathan Redmond treatment after he broke London speed limits against Man City on Saturday. Plus, Andy Carroll is doing King and Country proud over in France. One last England call-up? Who says no… Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@...

Oct 07, 202448 min

Mailbag: Is it okay for fans to leave early?

After the Emirates began to empty out despite Arsenal’s 2-0 lead over PSG, should fans who leave early be called out for their disloyalty? Or should we all just stop whining about it? Luke, Andy, and Vish tackle one of football’s big taboos. Elsewhere, with the old guard of managers almost completely gone (just you left now, Dychey), have managerial mind games become a thing of the past? Plus, why are more players returning to their old clubs and what are our favourite football noises? No, Gary ...

Oct 05, 202443 min

The Preview Show: Donaldson & Champion

Could Pete kick through a door? That’s the big question he poses to Luke, Andy and Vish on today’s Ramble. Elsewhere, Andy also finds some time to explain why Man United won’t sack Erik ten Hag just yet, Luke backs the decision to call up Dominic Solanke to the England squad, and Pete is forced to talk about Only Fools and Horses The Musical. Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com . Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for j...

Oct 04, 20241 hr 6 min

Ramble Reacts: A momentous night for Aston Villa

And to mark the occasion Pete and Luke are sniffing some mysterious minty white powder. IT’S MENTHOL, ALL RIGHT! They discuss that Jhon Durán goal, that Emi Martínez save, and whether this was the greatest night in Villa’s history since Steve Bruce had that cabbage thrown at his head. Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com . Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: https://www.patreon.com/footballramble . ...

Oct 02, 202430 min

Mike Sheep

Arsenal could only manage a 2-0 win at home to PSG. Pathetic. Today, Pete, Vish and Jim (mainly Pete) are here to question why Arsenal weren’t able to despatch this new woke incarnation of PSG by at least four goals, like the mighty Newcastle did last season. Elsewhere, Pete questions whether everyone in the world named Nuri Şahin is extremely handsome. Plus, Charlie Kane appears to have been sourcing some new brand deals for Harry. You can’t keep a good man down… Find us on X , Instagram , TikT...

Oct 02, 202447 min

Ramble Reacts: The Cherries beat the sea slugs

Bournemouth beat Southampton 3-1, which means Southampton are still languishing near the bottom of the table. Just how Luke likes it… Today, he and Jim take a look at Southampton and question how much time Russell Martin has left in the job. Graham Potter loitering in the Sky studio like a vulture probably isn't helping. Speaking of which, Luke explains which Sky presenter is a “poor man’s Gary Cotterill”. A damning comparison! Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: s...

Sep 30, 202431 min

Vish’s public therapy

We are gathered here today to help our friend Vithushan Ehantharajah whose football team has fallen on hard times. Please take a moment to think of Vish. Moment over. Today, Luke, Jim and Vish analyse Tottenham’s decision to cash in their Man United voucher this weekend. Plus, Luke declares that James Justin’s goal at Arsenal is the goal of the season so far and we agree that it’s best to keep José Mourinho at a safe distance after some more incredible antics from the special one. Find us on X ,...

Sep 30, 202454 min

Mailbag: Are the dark arts getting darker?

Marcus, Luke and Jim discuss whether the dark arts are becoming more common in modern football. Why are we answering that question now, you ask? Well, no reason… Plus, which players would we like to bring out of retirement and what should the punishment be for managers leaving their technical area? Come join us! Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramble.com . Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-free shows for just $5 per month: https://www.p...

Sep 28, 202428 min

The Preview Show: Qaraline Quentin

Qarabag could have descended on the Tottenham Hotspur Stadium on a fleet of bikes. Qarabag’s manager Gurban Gurbanov COULD have been drinking some Carabao in a caravan. But no: instead Spurs had to go and beat them. Marcus, Jim, Luke and Vish look ahead to Ange Postecoglou’s date with destiny and Erik ten Hag. Plus, Jason Tindall rocks up to St James’ Park dressed as a judge and Fenerbahçe reach the height of pettiness. Jose Mourinho is their manager, after all. Plus, a TITANIC game of Jack’s En...

Sep 27, 20241 hr 6 min

Ramble Reacts: Liverpool excite, Man United disappoint

It was far from plain sailing but Liverpool were ruthless against West Ham in the Rigobert Song derby, while in the Steve McClaren derby Man United reminded the big man just why he’s put the Atlantic Ocean between him and Old Trafford. Marcus and Andy are here to discuss everything from the Carabao Cup and Europa League! Plus, Fabio Borini is still at large! You read that right. Find out all about it – only on Ramble Reacts! Find us on X , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show...

Sep 25, 202438 min

#WeDreamAndAchieve

THE RAMBLE. A podcasting masterpiece towering 500 metres above sea level, but a land-saving 200 metres wide. #RambleNationalDay Marcus, Luke and Jim react to the latest Carabao downpour and Chris Smalling’s latest outpouring of love for NEOM. Elsewhere, listeners give AFC Wimbledon’s fundraiser a Ramble twist and Everton’s new owner considers landing a spitfire on the pitch at Goodison Park. Plus, Rodri’s injured for the season and Jim gets injured by hypocrisy. Join us! Find us on X , Instagram...

Sep 25, 202447 min

A gouty time in France

Time for a Tuesday tickle! Marcus, Vish and Jim discuss Aston Villa’s breakneck start to the season and Morgan Rogers and Ollie Watkins turning into a quality big man, bigger man partnership. Plus, we wonder just how good Newcastle are after a disastrous time of it at the tweediest stadium in the Premier League – while their former man Andy Carroll gets dragged out of a vineyard and immediately scores two goals for Bordeaux. Plus, a player in Wales gets arrested midway through a football match. ...

Sep 24, 202436 min
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