Steve Bruce is back, baby! Today, Marcus, Jim and Pete celebrate his arrival at Blackpool by trying to decide if they would rather go for a drink with him or Nathan Jones. Elsewhere, Jim explains why things might not be as bad as we think at Man United and Cristiano Ronaldo tells everyone that he should still be starting for Portugal. Plus, Leicester have shithoused the Premier League. Jamie Vardy must be so proud. Join the Football Ramble WhatsApp Channel: https://whatsapp.com/channel/002...
Sep 04, 2024•40 min
Everyone wants to bring a wee mate with them on deadline day, right? This year, the end of the window actually threw up some fascinating storylines for some big names, including Jadon Sancho switching one frying pan for another, slightly less hot frying pan. Marcus, Luke and Jim catch up with the best of the headlines. We discuss Raheem Sterling (and soon Harry Kane’s) move to Eng- I mean Arsenal. We also assess whether Sancho can reignite his career and whether Ivan Toney has killed his off onc...
Sep 03, 2024•37 min
Everything looked so good for Everton but like all good horror films, it all went wrong in the end. Today, Marcus, Luke, Jim and Pete show a degree of sympathy towards Everton fans for the nightmare that they are currently living through. Elsewhere, it was the same old story for Man United at home to Liverpool - at least Erik ten Hag won the FA Cup, though. Plus, there are mentions for Richard Keys, Hulk Hogan and the Motherwell Fan TV commentator. Welcome to Monday’s Football Ramble. Join the F...
Sep 02, 2024•1 hr 2 min
With the transfer window shut Marcus, Jim and Andy dream up some transfers from football history they wish they could’ve forced through. Jim’s packing Carlos Tevez off to distant lands and guess where Andy’s sending Gabriel Batistuta and Ronaldo… We also try to decide what’s the toughest job in football - whether that’s managing this current iteration of Manchester United, the Brazilian national team or a relegation-threatened side further down the leagues. Plus, we reinvent Sunday League for th...
Aug 31, 2024•27 min
Today, Pete and Andy have a Freaky Friday body swap, which means Pete tells Marcus and Jim about some Turkish transfer news and Andy tells us about a world-champion hot dog eater that has been banned from next year’s competition. Incredible. Elsewhere, we make the case for Ant and Dec to host the Champions League draw and Marcus gets excited about Lee Carsley’s first England squad. Plus, Andy explains why Federico Chiesa could be a good signing for Liverpool. Mo Salah’s replacement? Join the Foo...
Aug 30, 2024•55 min
Today, we're bringing you a special teaser of what you can expect every week on the Football Ramble Patreon. For just $5 a month, you'll get an extended version of every Wednesday episode of the Ramble, which features 20 minutes of Ramble Uncut! Think spicy takes you won't get on the main show, correspondence from other Patreon subscribers, behind-the-scenes news and regular Pitbull updates. There's just three days left to get 15% off an annual subscription, so don't miss out. Just head to ...
Aug 29, 2024•26 min
What a time to be alive, it’s the Carabao Cup second round! Like all of last night’s fixtures, Marcus, Jim and Luke start today’s show by continuing to pay tribute to the great Sven-Göran Eriksson. Elsewhere, Luke and Jim explain why Manuel Ugarte could be a great signing, not just for Man United but also the Ramble. Plus, a local council leader in Wolverhampton has responded to Noni Madueke and we learn that Andros Townsend currently is being held hostage in Turkey. At least the weather is nice...
Aug 28, 2024•55 min
We kick off today’s raving Ramble with the most important question to emerge from the opening rounds of the Premier League: is Lars Sivertsen’s Dad a better golfer than Kim Jong Un? We do find time to round up the rest of the weekend’s action, as the league’s newcomers are already struggling and Man City continue to meet their scarcely believable standards. Plus, Marcus delivers his verdict on Oasis’ reunion and we spot a wild Wayne Rooney having the strangest of all the solo pints… FYI, we reco...
Aug 27, 2024•40 min
Who predicted Chelsea vs Wolves would be the barn barner of the weekend? Marcus, Andy, Vish and Pete revel in what turned out to be a very enjoyable trip to Wolverhampton for Noni Madueke. Elsewhere, Marcus comes to the realisation that Enzo Maresca could be the right man for Chelsea and Erik ten Hag is embarrassed by some seagulls in Brighton. Oh, and Amanda Staveley wants to buy a stake in Tottenham… great. We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Friday Sept...
Aug 26, 2024•58 min
Only one of the 17 surviving Premier League clubs from last season hasn’t increased their ticket prices – and some of those clubs have hiked prices or even completely binned concession tickets for children. Marcus, Luke and Andy tackle one of the most burning issues in the Premier League right now. Plus, what’s the biggest false dawn in football? Would it be better if transfers were just revealed on matchday? And where does Manuel Neuer rank in the pantheon of legendary goalkeepers? Come join us...
Aug 24, 2024•36 min
Roll up, roll up, the Man United Circus is coming to town! Grab your trapeze and juggling balls, Marcus, Luke and Andy are here to preview the weekend's football. Speaking of circuses, Performing monkey Luke questions whether Chelsea's 2-0 first-leg lead is enough for the return trip to Servette. Elsewhere, we get excited for a tasty tea-time treat as Arsenal travel to Aston Villa and Ringmaster Marcus tells us all why David Moyes is the Scottish Carlo Ancelotti. Find us on Twitter , ...
Aug 23, 2024•58 min
Marcus, Luke and Pete check in with the transfer merry-go-round as players are flung off it left and right. Various Crystal Palace defenders head for the door, while Ivan Toney’s definitely leaving Brentford - doesn’t even matter where he ends up, nobody knows anyway. Elsewhere, Aaron Ramsdale tries to avoid repeating the exact situation he’s in right now and we get more info on Jürgen Klinsmann’s reign of terror while USMNT boss. Find us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok a...
Aug 22, 2024•46 min
Lars is on the pod! Lars is on the pod! Just like João Félix at Chelsea Lars Sivertsen has returned and he joins Marcus and Pete on today’s Ramble. Lars makes a strong start as he instantly labels Chelsea’s transfer policy as “mental”. Elsewhere Pete speculates on the colour of Jamie Vardy’s guts and Lars digs out his rulebook after we hear about a player in Peru who got sent off because he took a piss at the side of the pitch. Find us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and&...
Aug 21, 2024•46 min
Jamie Vardy, oh how we have missed you! On this edition of Ramble Reacts, Marcus and Luke gush over an absolutely vintage display from Vardy, featuring a Red Bull and some unbelievable s**thousery. Elsewhere, Marcus backs Leicester to stay in the Premier League and Luke reminds us that Oliver Skipp is only 23. Get involved. Find us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: [email protected] . We're back on stage and tickets are out...
Aug 19, 2024•29 min
It’s the first weekend and we’ve already had a referee apology, a broken VAR monitor and a dubious headbutt. Oh, how we've missed you, Big Daddy Premier League. Today, Pete tells Marcus and Luke that the Premier League should introduce a silly sausage card. Plus, Marcus has to come to terms with the fact that Raheem Sterling could be leaving Chelsea and we hear about some fabulous shithousery in Hungary. It’s good to be back! Find us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and&nb...
Aug 19, 2024•56 min
The new season's underway, so it's time to tackle some more questions about our dear old Barclays! Marcus, Luke and Vish wonder if the abundance of established top-flight sides might make for a competitive Premier League this year - but also decide on who's going to have the most boringly predictable mid-table season. Plus, Marcus has plans to make Fulham's new kit launch a bit more sexy and we wonder which Premier League manager (plus Jason Tindall) would last longest on Survivor. Sign up to th...
Aug 17, 2024•31 min
The Barclays is BACK! Pete, Vish and Luke welcome the return of our favourite ostentatious marketing exercise by deciding who will celebrate a goal this weekend with a tribute to that Turkish Olympic shooter. Don’t worry though, there’s plenty to look forward to this season. We’ve got Andrew Tate hosting Match of the Day’s Brat summer, Erik ten Hag frantically spinning some expensive plates and Ipswich Town bringing the style - and hopefully some substance - back to the big time. It’s your block...
Aug 16, 2024•1 hr 5 min
That’s right, we’re mixing it up this year. Instead of only revealing our embarrassing predictions at the end of the Premier League like usual, we’re revealing them before the season even kicks off! Marcus, Luke and Vish are here to run through their predictions for what’s shaping up to be a proper tasty Barclays bonanza. Can anyone stop Man City? Who’s going down? Will Enzo Maresca outlast Nuno Espírito Santo? Which manager will headbutt Gary Neville before the season’s out? Let’s find out! Rem...
Aug 15, 2024•45 min
Today is the final episode of the Football Ramble. Sadly, Zlatan Ibrahimovic has overhead kicked us into court. Pete, Luke and Vish provide your midweek musings as the Premier League charges towards us. The cat gets revenge on Kurt Zouma, Conor Gallagher finally finds somewhere to sit, and Pete tries to release Paul Dummett into the wild… but he gets eaten by an eagle. And finally, of course, we pay our respects to an absolute institution of English football which has finally come to an en...
Aug 14, 2024•47 min
Wondering what our live show at the London Palladium in September will be like? Well, here’s a sneak preview of what to expect! Back in 2019, we took the Ramble on the road in the UK and North America and played in theatres everywhere. So, before our biggest ever live show to date, we went back into the archives to share some of our favourite on-stage moments. If you like what you hear, then don’t delay! Head to footballramblelive.com to get your tickets for Football Ramble: Time Tunnel on Frida...
Aug 13, 2024•21 min
Managers dodging handshakes, penalties getting skied over bars, blokes wearing shirts with very specific messages for pedos, and Pete making inappropriate jokes about Luke. You know what that means? Football is back! Marcus, Vish, Luke and Pete revel in Portsmouth’s barn-burning return to the Championship, while Andre Onana gives us a taste of his masterplan for the season ahead. Meanwhile, Matthjis De Ligt seeks judicial immunity inside Old Trafford and Chelsea’s spending gets so out of hand th...
Aug 12, 2024•59 min
The transfer window has been prettyyyy quiet – which has got one listener thinking: when was the last time a good old marquee signing really transformed a club's fortunes? After 20 years of constant shithousery, how can Pepe possibly be reintegrated back into ordinary society? What will he do? Which little bald chap did Marcus admire as a kid? And is Positive Pete here to stay? All answered on today's Mailbag! We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Frid...
Aug 10, 2024•31 min
The world’s biggest super friendly – aka the Community Shield – is here and Kevin De Bruyne has grown a man bun to celebrate the occasion. Marcus, Jim and Pete, on the other hand, are celebrating the occasion by spreading Luke Shaw conspiracy theories. Elsewhere, Marcus and Pete question whether Jim is a pickpocket working for Mikel Arteta and we pay tribute to the great Pepe after his retirement. Oh, and if you think the conspiracy theories are bad, just wait until you hear Pete’s story about g...
Aug 09, 2024•49 min
Have you been wondering how on earth Atlético Madrid can afford Julián Álvarez? Then you're in the right place. Today on our sister show On The Continent, Dotun Adebayo, Andy Brassell and Lars Sivertsen explain everything you need to know about this potential deal and discuss how Álvarez could become the new Antoine Griezmann. Elsewhere, reports say that Borussia Dortmund might sack former Arsenal Head of Recruitment Sven Mislintat after just three mo...
Aug 08, 2024•36 min
Julián Álvarez looks set to leave Man City for 81.5 million big ones! He’ll be gutted to leave Man City without winning the Carabao though. Marcus is back and he’s joined by Pete, Luke and Jim to celebrate the arrival of Emile Smith Rowe at Craven Cottage. Elsewhere, some Champions League VAR officials have been arrested for stealing a road sign and Gary Neville spent his weekend DJing at a festival. Happy Rambling! We're back on stage and tickets are out NOW! Join us at London Palladium on Frid...
Aug 07, 2024•53 min
Olympic football has reached the semi-final stages! But never mind that, have you been watching the swimming and the shooting? Today, Pete, Jim, Andy and Vish are here to discuss all the latest news, including an incredible Jürgen Klopp lookalike, a Newcastle fan that was inspired by Alan Pardew, and RCD Mallorca’s pre-season tour of the Midlands and North of England. Plus, a manager in Scotland has been sacked after losing the first game of the season. Football’s officially back! We're back on ...
Aug 05, 2024•42 min
We’ve answered more than 100 of your questions since kicking off the Mailbag last season. Today, we’re sharing some of our favourites! From the moral mazes of modern football and Jürgen Klopp’s legacy, to who we’d pick to take a penalty and which European food we’d take into battle, we’ve had a bit of everything. So sit back and enjoy as Luke rummages through the best of the Football Ramble Mailbag 23/24! Got a question for next week’s Mailbag? Find us on Twitter , Instagram , ...
Aug 03, 2024•27 min
The Premier League season is fast approaching and Luke, Jim, Vish and Andy have worked out how Arsenal can finally get to Man City and win the league… Hire Zlatan Ibrahimović in the Jason Tindall role. Today, we hear how Zlatan’s beef with Pep Guardiola is still raging on in 2024. Elsewhere, news has broken that West Ham might be signing a new forward for the 56th time under their current ownership. Plus, Vish auditions to be Gennaro Gattuso’s interpreter. Sometimes may be bat, sometimes may be ...
Aug 02, 2024•44 min
Today, we're bringing you a special teaser of what you can expect every week on the Football Ramble Patreon. For just $5 a month, you'll get an extended version of every Wednesday episode of the Ramble, which features 20 minutes of Ramble Uncut! Think spicy takes you won't get on the main show, correspondence from other Patreon subscribers, behind-the-scenes news and regular updates from Matt Le Tissier's newsletter (obviously). Starting today, any new Patreon sign-ups can get 15% off an annual ...
Aug 01, 2024•22 min
Bad news, everyone: the Amazon seller who sold Pete a durian for us to try today had to cancel the order due to “supply chain issues.” More news as we get it. That leaves Pete, Luke and Jim with plenty of time to tuck into some other breaking news: Mick McCarthy and Roy Keane’s debuts in the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Plus, Arsenal sign Italian defending dreamboat Riccardo Calafiori, Conor Gallagher might be about to buy an interrailing ticket to Madrid and Steve Bruce eyes up the next season of...
Jul 31, 2024•42 min
