Jim Campbell is happy with a point at Anfield. However, he’s not so happy with Zinchenko attempting to do the Stanky Legg when faced up against Mohamed Salah in the box. He and Luke tuck into the festive feast served up by Liverpool and Arsenal, before enjoying Robbie Fowler sticking the boot into Michael Owen for dessert. Plus, Jim admits he would move in with Peter Drury for the rest of the year if it meant Arsenal win the league. Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok &nb...
Dec 23, 2023•31 min
Our listener Christian has a theory: could a European Super League actually improve English football? Marcus, Luke and Andy debate the merits of that suggestion on today’s Mailbag. Elsewhere, Luke explains why someone should make a biopic all about Paolo Maldini’s tennis career and there's agreement that humiliation is the key to improving players' conduct in football! Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footballramb...
Dec 23, 2023•27 min
What reason would Roy Hodgson have to incubate Pep Guardiola? I don’t know. It’s cold outside, but Marcus, Luke, Andy and Jim are here to warm your footballing hearts with tales of Hodgson looking after his owl eggs, Ross County’s manager having a full-blown rant about the standard of Scottish football, and Gary O’Neil almost certainly getting a contentious penalty decision against him and his team on Christmas Eve! Probably in the 92nd minute. Plus, can Luke Darth Moore at last turn his fortune...
Dec 22, 2023•51 min
Marcus needs consoling. Again. That’s because Fulham have been drawn against Liverpool in a two-legged semi-final. Oh no... Luke joins Marcus to react to Liverpool dishing out yet another defeat to poor old David Moyes, who made history by becoming the first manager to try and play a Carabao Cup quarter-final via email. Plus, why Santa has been dragged into the middle of the Celtic-Rangers rivalry and bold predictions that Steve Cooper’s going to pop up in the Bournemouth end at the weekend. Pro...
Dec 20, 2023•34 min
The Carabao’s back! Today, Jim and Andy have to console Marcus after Kieran Trippier - aka one of Gareth Southgate's brave boys - suffered a difficult night at Stamford Bridge. At least Fulham won! Speaking of Southgate, Marcus touts Steve Cooper as the next England manager now that he’s been sacked by Nottingham Forest. Plus, we hear from a cockney parrot and learn about some West Ham fans that crashed a boat into Hammersmith Bridge… Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok &...
Dec 20, 2023•50 min
The sound of laughter, the sun appearing while you’re out for a walk, scoring a late penalty to draw 2-2 at the Etihad, these are just a few of the things guaranteed to bring a friendly smile out of Roy Hodgson. Today, Marcus, Luke, Jim and Vish take a moment to enjoy that before settling into their seats to watch the next chapter of the Martínez Cinematic Universe. Surely, Neal Maupay is the story’s best villain? Plus, Vish compares Liverpool 0 - 0 Man United to watching an episode of Takeshi’s...
Dec 18, 2023•54 min
“Football was better in the good old days!” But was it really? Today, Marcus, Luke and Vish state the case for why football is actually better off with fewer Vinnie Jones type characters. I am sure Gazza agrees… Marcus then plays the hits by reminiscing about the time a 35-year-old Gabriel Batistuta nearly signed for Fulham and shoehorning everyone's (no-one's) favourite British-Canadian tennis playing Greg into the show. And no, it’s not Greg Proops… Follow us on Twitter , Instagram...
Dec 16, 2023•31 min
Join us for a bumper Barclays preview! Marcus, Luke, Jim and Vish settle in to write some Tom Cairney fan fiction and wonder if Steve McClaren will tear his hair island out should Man United get punished by Jürgen n’ co. Elsewhere, Stevey Cooper looks to save his skin Under The Lights™ and Chelsea vote to ban something they’ve been doing all season - very noble. Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@footbal...
Dec 15, 2023•1 hr 2 min
After Newcastle’s chaotic loss against Milan, Pete comes down from off the ceiling to commiserate Andy, who saw his dreams of some paid Europa League work at St James’ go up in smoke. Commiserations are also extended to fans of the Premier League’s UEFA coefficient and we catch up with results elsewhere, as the Champions League group stages rage against the dying of the light. Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: show@foot...
Dec 13, 2023•28 min
Is Man United’s season over? Marcus, Jim and Vish debate that on today’s Ramble after their Champions League exit has left Vish yearning for the haunted boy himself, Ole Gunnar Solskjær. Things must be really bad… Elsewhere, Jim explains why perhaps Arteta didn’t play the kids in their “big rubber” against PSV last night and we wonder whether Sevilla have a Europa League Black Card that will guarantee them a spot in the knockouts, despite finishing bottom of their group. Plus, we take a moment t...
Dec 13, 2023•42 min
We see you, sitting there with that apple core in your hand, about to listen to this podcast. See that bin over there? Go for it. Be brave. Be like Michael Owen. Marcus, Luke and Andy react to one of the weirdest things anyone has ever said this year, while Man United revert to their painful norm. Plus, Andy explains how Aston Villa went full-blown Emery on Arsenal, Marcus inspires Fulham to score more goals, and Whamaggedon descends upon Northampton Town! Oh, and we REALLY channel the spirit of...
Dec 11, 2023•59 min
After a week where you could watch every Premier League game live, do we actually have... access to too much football? Today, Marcus, Luke, Andy and Pete are back for our (now weekly) Ramble Mailbag! On the show, the Ramblers are given the power to overturn one result from football history and Luke, nobly, decides to use his powers for good to overturn one of football’s great injustices. There's also a story about an 80-year-old Norwegian referee that has officiated over 5000 matches across two ...
Dec 09, 2023•30 min
We want to talk about the football. Marcus wants to talk about the fact that he watched Fulham on Wednesday with Stuart Broad and then convinced Roberto Martinez to take the England job at the urinals. Well, we’ve had one England manager resign from a toilet so why not… Marcus, Andy, Luke and Pete discuss Steve Cooper’s last chance saloon at Wolves and a huge showdown at Villa Park! Pete also ponders on the logistics of ‘doing an Emi Martinez’, while Marcus has penned an ode to the great man. Em...
Dec 08, 2023•58 min
Unlike Trent Alexander-Arnold, Pete and Andy keep their bums very much covered on tonight’s Ramble Reacts! But there’s no hiding Pete’s secret… They discuss a hugely important win for Man United, Aston Villa’s masterclass to beat Man City, and why Evangelos Marinakis’s Craven Cottage ticket ended up in a hedge – and why ol’ Roy the Boy could be thrown in one soon, too! Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: [email protected] . Sign up to the Football Ram...
Dec 06, 2023•27 min
Arsenal went to Kenilworth Road and stole the points! Just like Aaron Ramsdale’s dad stole Arsenal’s Christmas decorations... After a brilliant game of football Marcus, Jim, Vish and Andy are here to explain why chaos is the answer for Luton Town going forward. They then all agree that chaos is definitely NOT the answer for Man United ahead of a potentially season-defining clash with Chelsea tonight and celebrate the FC Twente fan that successfully carried 64 beers back to his seat. Plus, is Chr...
Dec 06, 2023•51 min
Just another normal weekend. And you haven’t even heard about Pete breaking up a fight between two horses yet. Marcus, Luke, Pete and Vish are here to unpack the madness that was Man City vs Spurs, the madness that was Liverpool vs Fulham, and the madness of Old Trafford’s chicken prep. Plus, we pay our respects to Paul Heckingbottom waking up to find out he’s ‘going to be’ sacked later today and make Vish feel really, really old. Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and...
Dec 04, 2023•1 hr 2 min
Is there a feeling in England that supporters of English clubs from other countries “aren’t true fans”? What Premier League rule change would you like to implement? What’s the best stadium atmosphere you have experienced live? Marcus, Luke, Jim and Vish are back answering your questions on today’s Mailbag, feat. some wonderfully heartwarming stories about how Premier League fan culture is thriving around the world. It really is great to see - just please DO NOT think about traveling to watch you...
Dec 02, 2023•31 min
December is upon us! And what can be more festive than a snowball fight between Aberdeen fans and Helsinki’s goalkeeper in the Europa Conference League? Luke is back in the studio and joins Marcus, Vish and Jim to hear an update from Head Foreman Steve McManaman on the Anfield stadium extension, ponder on just how many Newcastle United players Erik Ten Hag will embrace after defeat this weekend, and discuss whether Angeball can stand up to Pep’s Man City. Plus, can Vish keep his lineal belt afte...
Dec 01, 2023•1 hr 3 min
Welcome to hell? Lads, I’ve already been in it. Those were the thoughts of a philosophical Vithushan Ehantharajah on tonight’s Ramble Reacts after Manchester United failed to beat the Hall of Fame of Your Favourite Players You Don’t Really Pay Attention To. Vish and Marcus reflect on a dramatic and chaotic Champions League night in Istanbul, mainly thanks to the slippery hands of one man: André Onana. Plus, Mikel Arteta takes the handbrake off and leaves us thinking Arsenal are going to win the ...
Nov 30, 2023•35 min
Newcastle were on the end of a stinking decision last night. Predictably, Pete seems the least outraged by the whole incident - but Marcus and Vish are angry about it, particularly because it robbed Nick Pope of his clean sheet bonus. Maybe not quite as angry as the Newcastle fan that had to turn on his Christmas lights to cheer himself up, mind... Elsewhere, we ask if Man City fans would be happier if they gave every team a head start and Pete’s penned a power ballad for a very sad Gary O’Neil!...
Nov 29, 2023•57 min
We witnessed one of the greatest ever Premier League goals on Sunday, but there are more urgent matters to attend to on today’s show. Like… is Sean Dyche actually bald? Marcus, Vish, Jim and Pete guide you through a chaotic Premier League weekend! We argue that Lewis Miley looks like a stretched out Furby, Steve Bull should be given an unlimited number of dogs by Wolverhampton City Council, and why Pete should definitely be allowed to launch a new German techno club in Motherwell. Come join us! ...
Nov 27, 2023•58 min
We’re finally back in the warm, comforting arms of our benign Premier League overlords. And do you know what that means? Protest planes. Pete, Vish, Andy and Jim discuss how Everton fans should make their protest heard, what it would be like to have your head in Jurgen Klopp’s armpit, and unconfirmed reports that Erling Haaland has a Viking longboat on its way to Liverpool full of special super fish. Plus, can Horsham default their way to the FA Cup final? Up the Lard Army! Follow us on Twitter ...
Nov 24, 2023•54 min
Been wondering what you’re missing out on over on the Football Ramble Patreon? Well, here’s a taste… Every single Wednesday, we serve up our Friends of the Ramble with ‘Ramble Uncut’ – an extended edition of the show where we let you in behind the curtain for our unfiltered ramblings about football, life, and Alan Pardew’s presumably sickening taste in interior design. Today, you’ll hear some of our favourite moments so far this season - from Pete’s latest baffling investment, to the time Andy w...
Nov 23, 2023•31 min
Is İlkay Gündoğan turning into the German Roy Keane? Can anyone stop Jim from turning into the God of Football? And will Kevin Keegan EVER stop hosting industry conferences? A listener has a fresh update for us... Marcus, Jim, Andy and Vish are here to look back on the final round of Euro 2024 qualifiers, where Wales fell short of automatic qualification and now face the play-offs. We wonder whether people potentially have unreasonable expectations for this current Wales squad. Follow us on ...
Nov 22, 2023•44 min
England completed a statement 8-1 aggregate victory over North Macedonia. Marcus and Jim are on hand to send that message to the rest of Europe. They also remind us that there are no rebounds in a penalty shootout. Once that’s out of the way, the lads discuss if these two poor performances will have any effect on England going forward and whether Rico Lewis can make the squad for the Euros. Plus, would Harry Kane go to Oktoberfest by himself? ollow us on Twitter , Instagram , T...
Nov 20, 2023•31 min
Marcus, Vish and Jim are here to bemoan the refereeing that made England not have a shot on target until the 64th minute against Malta. WHERE’S THE INTERNATIONAL PGMOL?! We also react to the seismic news of Everton’s 10 point deduction and ask where it leaves the club, the fans, and… other clubs. Plus, Sergio Ramos awards Shakira a Grammy for a song all about slagging off Gerard Piqué and we reappraise the goalscoring enigma that is Romelu Lukaku. And is anyone able to look through France’...
Nov 20, 2023•46 min
Marcus, Jim, Vish and Pete are back to answer more of your burning questions, as we revel in football’s stupid stuff and a listener writes to us after attending that chaotic Norwegian promotion ding dong last week. Plus, we look into how football can stop eating itself, deciding the only answer is to have more sex in Marvel films. Or bao buns. Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: [email protected] . Sign up to the Football Ramble Patreon for ad-f...
Nov 18, 2023•27 min
Is a draw in Tbilisi - thanks to a 92nd minute equaliser - enough to rid Scotland of their dreaded curse? Marcus, Pete, Jim and Vish call for any curse experts to help them solve that mystery. They also speculate whether Gareth Southgate is cooking up any experiments in his lab ahead of England vs Malta and debate which of today’s Ramblers have the cutest dad… It’s The Preview Show! Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: sho...
Nov 17, 2023•49 min
The all-important milestone is upon us: it’s 211 days until Euro 2024! But seriously, the current England squad is full of ridiculous talents and a fair few figures who divide opinion – not least Gareth Southgate himself. So today, Marcus and Luke try and make sense of it all! They pick their best England XI for next summer and answer your questions about the biggest challenges Southgate faces. Don’t miss it! Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and YouTube , and email us here: sh...
Nov 16, 2023•37 min
The FA Cup first round reached its conclusion last night. So today, Pete decided to bring the magic of the cup into the studio, quite literally… Donny’s joined on the show by Marcus, Luke and Jim who all have to listen to his travel advice for Malta and – erm – Horsham, before Marcus finally puts Pete in detention for slagging off Harry Maguire. Plus, Luke explains why John Stones could be one of England's best-ever defenders. Follow us on Twitter , Instagram , TikTok and...
Nov 15, 2023•46 min