The Flex and Rooms Daily podcast.
Hey, it's flexing Rooms on the catch up podcast. Hey girls, today we're talking about Flex's privacy. If you're a follow up of Flex, which I'm sure you are, you would have seen her rant and her rave on her story give little examples screenshops of people messages which as a viewer of your Instagram for many years, nothing tickles my fancy more than you roasting people in the story. But I must say, if I was that used.
To be my go to now I'm Hanny subtle and sweet on the internet.
If I was in the roast, if I was in the roast from you, like, that's got to hit different. I want to just apologize. I can't apologize on your behalf. But you know, don't have a panic attack over this. I get panic attacks when people even have a whisper of our criticism on me. So if you've found yourself in the firing line, no, it comes from a place of love or just do better.
I mean, I often feel as though people just lose their sense when they're interacting, not just with me, like look at a TikTok comment, look at some of the rogue stuff that just happens eventually you kind of get met with the energy you're bringing into the into the room. It's just what the consequence of that action. And also I feel like, you know how when you see a video on any kind of platform, there's an obvious thing
that happens and everybody points it out. It's like dog piling, so like maybe they've misspelled a word in the headline. Everyone's like, it's you know, colors with you, not without you or something, But every single comment saying it, that's the issue. Like I had already posted about this window situation, and everybody after it, I'm like, it's fair game. I'm coming for you in particular because what is bring back violence is where I'm at.
Okay, that's how I'm gonna stop. That's definitely a joke for the legal team here at TITA and AAR and more broadly, let's get to it.
And you know we've talked about quiet quitting before, right, It's this craze all over the internet at the moment. Contrary to what the name suggests, it's not when you actually quietly quit your job. It's when you mentally kind of check out, you start doing bare minimum. You don't break your back at your workplace because you've experienced mental health issues or burnout, or just realize that the amount of hours you're putting in is not really realistic or
fair for the amount of money you're getting in return. Right, And so I guess it started around COVID where people were recognizing work life balance and also seeing that they maybe aren't being treated so fairly by their employers and have to take matters into their own hand. If my employer isn't going to be mindful of what I need to be mentally healthy and sound, I gotta do it.
It's giving bright, I gotta step down. So when I first heard of this term, I was like, this feels like a nice concept, right, this idea that you can just pull back away from your duties and that nobody will notice and that'll be your almost like rebellion against the man, against the big dog, against the boss. Right, But realistically I'm thinking, will that just get you fired?
H But FLEXI, it's so hard to fire someone in Australia.
Yeah, it is hard. I mean, you have to manage somebody out, but it is possible. Like, realistically speaking, if I worked at a workplace I started checking out, I'm not working to the standard I was before, maybe not submitting things on time, maybe not staying late taking my full lunch hour. If for some reason that was going to be flagged as irresponsible behavior at the workplace, somebody can and would manage you out, like you're not going to get fired off the dome, but you could be jobless.
Well, let's just get something straight. And this is going to sound perhaps a little bit ill informed. Oh, but it has to be said. Okay, Number one, don't stay past five thirty.
You needed to finish work at nine point thirty. Now we're talking about hoste o'clock and off at five.
Said I'm gonna go do that. Don't come in early if they say you need to coming early. Once I did a job and I was and they said you have to come in before nine am. That's when I started. Come in at eight. Get across the news. You have to come in already, knowing what's going on the news. I said, yeah, I'll do it. Little did I know? No, you start at nine for a reason. There's morning editors. You don't need to come in an hour early. Go back in your box. Third of all, take the hour.
What you need to do when you start in a workplace is set boundaries very early on. You don't want to be the person that's working really hard. If you come in and you're kind of like a little bit behind, a little bit slow, people are going to assume that's your role and work around you. Yes, I don't want my colleagues to work more than me, like I don't
want them to have to shoulder the load. No, But at the same time, if I'm working for another person that's not myself, these things need to be considered.
But what about people who are currently in jobs and roles though, Like I think people who experience burnout usually are in the role for a couple of years, maybe a couple of months. You're settled, and they're like, Okay, whoa, this is a lot more than I bargained for. I'm having to really extend myself just to scrape by.
You know.
I remember working office and feeling like I could never get ahead of my schedule, like every single day. It wasn't that I wanted to stay back, but I had to do this amount of work and because I couldn't, like what am I meant to do? Because tomorrow there's a new batch work that comes and a new batch. I could not help but think, like my issue at the time wasn't that my mentality was wrong, that I physically did not have the support I needed to do the job properly when I was breaking my back and
going to put in less effort. I feel like in the short term it only ruins your day a little bit because anyone's like, what's happening, You're changing, Your boss is calling in for one on ones. We've noticed that so and so and so on. I don't. I guess the concept of quite quitting would make more sense to me if it was like, Hey, look at your work more rationally. Are you overcompensating, have you asked for support?
Are you acting your wage? You know what I'm saying, like, is the effort you're putting in conducive to what you're getting out for it? And if not, maybe get a new job. Because this idea of like how much can you withstand bloody behavior in a job that has expectations of you? A person couldn't do it. But that's why I'm capitalism handmaid and I'm built different.
Also, if your boss is mean to you, yeah, this isn't this is not normal. If you're in your first job or your second job, when you're like managers always mean reassess. I promise you it doesn't always have to be like that. Get the union in literally, don't make me say it twice. I've gotta be careful with my union chat because one day I might have employees and I'm like, do not join the union.
I'm all for it. I've got employees. Ask for what you need, Bob.
It's very nice of you, Flex and Frooms, Flexi. I have a little bit of a dilemma for you. It's not personal.
It never is.
Unfortunately, you save my personal things for my own financial gain of course, of course, but this one is from a woman who is going to a different UNI to her partner. So it's a high schooler. I love that we have gen Z high schooler.
Human eye.
It's like a dog. I'm not saying it's a boy or a girl. It's a it. I want to get straight into it. This is what she's written in. My boyfriend and I are going to different unis after high school, and I'm worried it will break us up. You're not wrong, con Flex and Firms, please help me. My boyfriend and I are about to graduate year twelve. We've been together for a year and a half and we're going to
UNI's on the other side of the city. I know we can see each other outside of this, but I've been doing research, and only two percent of high school relationships work out sight the study.
Babe.
I'm also a really jealous person, and I'm worried about him making friends with girls and becoming interested in them instead. What should I do? Before you answer that, I'll just ask you, do you have a boyfriend in high school? No?
Okay?
My initial opinion is hun, You're not wrong. Two percent like.
Thought to be much lower, to be honest, but you could be the exception to the rule. Your love might stand the test of time.
We found love in a hopeless place, just the school bathrooms.
What do you reckon?
It's a yes from me, dog, It's a yes from me, brev. I mean, think about it. When you're in high school, you haven't even finished growing. Like I know that when you're twenty five, your frontal cortex or whatever is like it's completed.
The Sarah bellum.
It's fully loaded. And so until then, you're changing, You're going through puberty, you're going through other changes, body changes, mind changes, friendship changes. I mean I think you should part ways while you're still into each other and then do it ben affleck Jennifer Jennifer Lopez and arrive back when you're thirty.
It's you're not the whole thing, Like they're not thirty.
If we haven't no, no, when they get thirty.
Got it?
Like you know when you're like, oh, if we don't find anyone by the time we're thirty, we can walk up and a desperation tactics.
You have that consolation prize. Yeah. Look, I say write it out.
Till it really hurts.
Yeah, why not? How obviously she's done her research. She's letting fear and scarcity dictate whether or not they should stay together. Just let it run its natural course. When it's too difficult for you to be together, to preck up. But for now you're doing enjoyment.
So enjoy Oh that's quite nice advice.
Actually, yeah, right, like maybe like maybe eight more months left in you enjoy them. Yeah, crank it knowing that it's going to come to an end eventually, but for now it hasn't.
And just know perhaps it's your first sexual partner. Anyway, we're gonna leave there. But of course his chat is to celebrate Heartbreak High, which comes out this Wednesday, the fourteenth of September only on Netflix with a little exclamation
markets serious. To celebrate the launch of this series, Netflix invites you, Flexi and everyone else to Heartbreak High Uniform Shop Part Yeah anyway, It's open this Saturday and Sunday at five to zero King Street, Newtown, Sydney, five twenty King Street.
This is Flex and Frooms on kDa.
Have you been to a wedding recently?
I have not. The last wedding I went to was my brothers and that was like five years ago.
Whoa.
And before then I was a child at weddings, which is very annoying. It definitely was not invited the plus four for my mum. She's ICOP for one and the whole family's rocked out.
Liz, you know that's not good wedding hygiene. But also, hell yeah, you guys a little cutie, so bring along. My friend sent me this voice note completely out of the blue the other day, so I'm just going to play. It involves a wedding in Chile. I love that people know what I'd.
Like literally contact curation off the dough boy, mate.
I was at this word the other day in San fran and I heard a story that I thought you'd love. So a friend of mine went to this wedding in Chile recently and it was a boring, normal chiant wedding, you know, nothing to write about.
She was kind of like, you know, a bit bored of the whole thing.
Anyway, at about eleven, the music almost cuts and the.
Shrek theme song comes on right blasts out of nowhere.
A lady dressed as Fiona comes out with his big sign above her head that says shots.
And starts handing out shots to everyone.
And there's a dude in like a Shrek costume like coming in handing out like those balloons and make balloon animals out of and gives like one hundred of them out, and everyone goes, it's crazy. Everyone's dancing anyway, and then it's almost like as soon as it starts, it stops like an hour later, and it just goes back to the boring wedding.
And my friend was just stunned. She was like, what just happened?
And she's asking for people and people go, oh, yeah, that's that's crazier she's what's crazier, and like at weddings, it's a thing where they kind of inject a bit of fun and just.
Do something insane for an hour. It's live and up the party.
Genius idea and thought you'd absolutely love it.
A bit of a performance art, isn't it?
Literally? And I'm seeing photos and the Shrek is so uncanny. It's like a first amen.
There are those balloons. Honestly, it's genius. It would make the biggest difference because I don't think the average person could sustain and entertaining wedding the whole time.
You gotta have budget ebb and flow.
Like maybe the speeches are a little bit funny and then it gets sentimental for the first dance. But if it's funny, funny, funny, funny, we taken the piss. We're just gagging there. That is hilarious. Would you do it one hundred percent my wedding to be a garden wedding for the ceremony, then go to a small space.
Always want it to be smaller and more cramped and larger, larger, And you look and they're all on that dance floor in like a brand new building. I'm so righthn small, intimate, crazy music. We're giving eighties music, early two thousand's music. David Wedder. Yeah, so that's a vibe.
I love that so much. Look, there's so much I can go wrong in a wedding. I feel like most weddings are doomed to be terrible because you get people who've never planned an event in their life trying to plan the one of a century. You don't have, You don't have the skills. Shade though, no shade.
Also, things that you don't budget for are very like technical things, not just flowers, but other things. I'm personally going to be getting my friend Jordiana Johnson to be doing my wedding. She's a producer and a director. If you want to use her for an event, yeah absolutely.
I won't be caught spending you know, a bag on flowers.
So I don't get it.
People need to be you know what I love. There's this florus that does like fruit and vegetable installation displays like real spooky that is better to me than a bunch of roses that are going to die in six hours.
Like super pero. I don't know what that is. If you get it, you get.
It, yeah, okay, this is flex and frumes.
According to the Journal of Motivation and Emotion.
Hmmm mmm checked.
I'd never to be reviewed. Falling in love makes you less productive. When you are consumed by thoughts of your beloved, your ability to concentrate and perform the tasks is likely to diminish.
So what does that mean, don't fall in love?
Po Yeah, if you want to be a capitalist queen, you know what to do.
Interesting I mean, I'm I'm of the opinion that productivity should be banished, that it's actually a con and I'd rather not be productive. So I'm personally waiting to fall in love because right now I'm not very produc but I have no excuse.
Oh okay, get it. So if anybody wants to send in any application for Frumi's reason for lack of productivity, send it to frooms with three zero's no three ho's on Instagram.
Have you experienced that though?
Yeah?
Of course would you like that right now in the time of your career? Are you looking for lovelighter?
Yeah, I'm about to fall eleven o'clock off, like I can't do two things at once. I'm so sorry. So we've got six more months of the show.
You're listening to Flex and Frooms on Kita.
Miss Rumini. You know I moved into a new apartment a couple of months.
Ago, Now I sure do. I've been loving seeing you get in there.
It's absolutely gorgeous. I'm spending a bag on it. It feels good. I've elevated in the world. But with this elevation has come maybe a new mentality for how I posted the internet now. Four hourss ago, I was that influencer who was doing house tours room tours showing a layout of my home, showing identifiable areas, because I was like, who would even care to know who I am or where I go? What would anybody do with this information?
Then what started happening is that people would know exactly where I lived, or would be able to guess it quite quite well based on landmarks or just the type of trees or the streets or the bins or whatever it might be. And so with the next house I moved into, I didn't do any kind of like house related room to a type of content. I kept it to diys and general day course stuff. But I was very mindful not to disclose anything, not where the suburb
was not how many bedrooms it had nothing. Yes, next house, I got even more stringent with it. I was like, you know, I'm not even risking it because what happened is I was selling things on Facebook marketplace and people get coming into my house because I knew who I was and just wanted to like come and have a look basically, and then would be like, oh, gonna went to Flex's house. It was like this, Or I would order Uber Eats and then the drive would recognize me
and be like hey, like I'm a big fan. I'd be like, you're in my house, please leave. And so with this new apartment, I've gone the next step, like I do not try. I don't film in the day. I try and film only in closed rooms or on blank walls where it's just not identifiable at all. And recently people have been sending me messages like this, I'm convinced you live underground or something because I have not seen sunlight in your new home, or someone else said, oh,
I've also wanted about this. I assumed it was so people on the internet can't directly identify your location. But do you mean like you just want privacy? Like why are you hiding it, and I think it's really strange that people are even clocking this number one, this whole idea, like, I haven't seen sunlight, I haven't seen windows, I haven't seen anything that would give me any identification on where you live, because I didn't realize that me being more
private was clockable to a general audience. Right, and then somebody sent me the most bizarre message. And this is after receiving maybe ten messages in a row in the same day about this window thing. I posted a bit of content from my house and hobite that's getting renovated, and somebody responded and said, hey, flex, speaking of lights, what's the matter with windows in your new space? I haven't seen any daylight yet. Don't you have any sad face?
I'm this sad face just for context, is the one that like you put your two index I sad face?
And then I was like, I have had it, you idiots. I'm so shut up, you bloody dummies. Anyway, I said, wouldn't you sooner believe that I just haven't filmed in the day and that I don't have windows. Why would this exposed be premium marble everywhere house not have windows?
You bit back.
Yeah, I was like, I don't understand the logic or the question faintest concern, and then I was like, stop asking me dumb questions. I crop that one out because that was just swap. That was for her, that wasn't for but it's just dumb. I remember when I used to complain about getting silly messages. People would be like, people just want to connect with you, like they just want to like chat to you and have their experience. I'm like, well, come correct or don't come at all
because you kissing me. But it doesn't stop there. I ended up doing, you know, customarily a whole rant about the situation with receipts following that message. Naturally, I just come from a little lunch. From that point, I made an Instagram story and I said something to the effect of it would be condescending for me to say, use
your critical thinking skills like it would. I don't want to be that person on the internet, right However, However, I just don't understand, Like it's one thing to you're like, oh, I haven't seen any windows, That's all good. I'm like, but follow that thought, like you haven't seen any windows because you want to what and then you want to do what with that information? And you want to do what with it? And I was just like, you know, I haven't seen Ashton Kutch's kitchen, but I assume he
has one. You know, I haven't seen Dojakat's bathroom, but I assume she has one. This idea that you like your curiosity for more information to pay a clear picture, don't worry about it, like it's all good. And also I don't think people have been quite mindful of the implications of like, you know, having a public profile and being so accessible, like not just virtually accessible, but like the fact that people like You've even had instances of people have asked you like where does flex live?
Like what somebod does she live in?
It's like there's natural curiosity, and then there's extending outside of what is a natural curiosity for an unnatural one. If we had added an interaction before and we'd be like, oh, yeah, I've just come from home. Oh cool, where do you live? Great or good? But random people on the internet being like, well, I would never do anything crazy with that information. I would never say anything. I'm just curious, like why wouldn't you show me where you live? Why would I, you know,
what's so spooky? I also had to have a big I would say it was a scolding to pr agencies in particular. So I'm not sure if everybody's across this, but a lot of influencers, content creators, public figures will get sent free stuff, which is amazing. We love a freebie. But in order for you to get this free stuff, somebody has to know your address right and send it to you, and so often you might have a PO
box instead. But a lot of these PR companies won't send PR boxes because they want to, you know, get a courier, make it nice or whatever. And so you'll give an agency your address for this one thing, you know, like oh for this one lip gloss, you can have my address. But then what these agencies will do is that they'll just pass it to anybody in the agency because they want to send you this thing or this thing. And then before you know it, random people just have
access to your address. And the issue is they're not random, they're industry contacts. So now people who have context for you know, your lifestyle, have your address and also no privacy around that. The way they're holding that information, it's insane. Remember this instance where I sold something on Facebook marketplace and it was this chair. This person was like, can I unassemble the chair before I take it out the house?
And I was like, oh yeah, cool, like whatever. So I was like, I just need to take a call, like really really badly though, So can I just leave you in this front area or like outside in like the corridor kind of because like I wasn't expecting you to be doing like disassemblies, you know.
Yeah cool.
So I'm closed the door. I'm having this conversation. It was like a really important meeting. So I was like I couldn't not take it, but they couldn't actually get the chair out of the door, so it's like, yeah, you deal with it anyway. I get a message from this person a couple months later, Oh you know when you're having the call, like you know, you sounded really xyz, like really assertive, like a business person. And then I was like looking around your house and I realized I recognized,
like you're inside. I saw like something with your name on it, So I googled you and realized I recognized you and the Internet and all this whole thing about how like from literally being in my house and like essentially snooping. They were like oh, and then I was like overhearing what you were saying about social media, and I just get so crazy and like, now I've followed you for ages. Now I'm a fan, very foul so in the time since they started following you, and then yes,
and I'm like, you don't. You don't hear yourself. You don't hear yourself.
The PR company is a very interesting thing. I've had similar things, like when I started getting stuff sent to me years ago, my manager was like, no, you're not allowed to give your address out, like she would like actually get angry at me if I did. And also with my phone number, like she won't let me give my phone number out, like because she does some work with you as well, like don't give our phone numbers out.
And it's a very interesting thing. But then yeah, it's kind of like you have one experience that really rocks you, Like for example, when my car got broken into and was burnt, you have to think, like, is this a targeted attack? And I know that sounds paranoid, but we have friends in the industry that have been stalked, Like people get stalked, and it's very hard to like think about when you're not when you can't imagine.
It, or to assume of the exception to the rule, Like yes, I live a public life and post everything on the intept, but nobody ever stalk me. I'm different.
No babes and even like paparazzi's like people that get peparazzi near their house. I'm like, if you're in the BONDI are Bronti Surry Hill's Paddington area. I know the exact straight you're on. I know we live now, Like, surely there's got to be some legalities around that, but yeah, it's praying for you. Huh.
Yeah, let's hope it doesn't escalate. But don't worry. I'm in the front lines fighting. Oh yeah, everyone get some of this mouth. Feel free to unfollow a block because it's game over, not with my personal safety, with.
My proud of you pulled up your boundaries, hunt Per.
You been listening to the Flex and Frooms Daily podcast. For more, tune in Decater on DAB or stream it on iHeartRadio.