Why You Should Use Dating Stamps 👫 💕

The flex and Rooms Daily podcast.

A yeah, yea.

We both went to talk at the same time literally Newflix. I for the past few weeks we've been talking about therapy.

We have. We say that it's.

Often, you know the show, we talk about whatever we want, and obviously something's on our mind. That is the therapeutic use of psychologists and other healthcare professionals step in mind.

Now. We were talking about it so much.

So that some listeners dm to me with some contrary advice or contrary thoughts.

This is a woman with a name starting with me.

Okay, my unsolicited thoughts again, Sosburn not SOS strong opener.

I don't think that's quite strong, but I get strong for different reasons.

I listened to Yours and Flexes episode from yesterday where you spoke about therapy. I'm a provisional psychologist, but also someone who's been in therapy for ten years classic psychologists vibes, so I have a fair bit of experience on both sides of lacoin. My hot take is that you don't need to go to therapy if you don't have goals or are a bit stagnant. You need a life coach or something like that.

In Uni.

I remember learning that the majority of our clients are what is referred to as the worried. Well, okay, nothing wrong with you, but you think you need to be in therapy. Therapy is so people with mental health issues in brackets anxiety, depression, personality disorders, phobias, etc.

Etc.

And it's to use a therapeutic tool to work through that the worried. Well, just take up resources that are actually for people struggling. Sounds harsh, but like peeps need to get a life coach or watch motivational videos.

Lol.

I don't know self help books. People who are really struggling with their mental health can't get sessions booked in because sykes are booked.

Pych's books are closed or full.

But I think most people still don't have a great understanding of exactly what a psych does or can do for you, so the expectations are a bit ambig say with most things though, people don't know what things do because it's gate kept. Like you ask someone who's been therapy a lot, what is therapy and they're like, well, I mean it depends because like the person I.

Go to does this, but like your person could be different. You know, it's Okay, so what's going on here? It's I kind of remember a hair dresser when people used to ask me. I'm like, well, you, what do you want out of therapy? They're like, oh, I don't know. I want them to tell me. It's like, well, how are they meant to know? They don't even know you. Well, I don't want to tell someone who doesn't know me what I'm going through. Okay, Well, and then here we are.

A bunch of things. But then now you have people being like you get a diagnosis because this chick on TikTok told me x y z.

Yeah, there's something about the worried well and figuring out how to motivate people to seek out answers themselves, because we're not socialized that way. You have, you know, a carer in daycare, and then a primary school teacher, and then a high school teacher and then a Uni lecturer. People who are meant to give you the answers you're looking for, at least coach you to find them. People aren't trained to seek out this information on their own.

I see where she's coming from, but I think there's an issue with saying the worried well. I think it kind of gives a vibe that wealthy people don't have problems or like just because you don't have a I don't know how I'm trying to say it. Wealthy people, Well, I hear the worried well, that doesn't mean who.

Well, like no, just like well, like you're fine. Right.

Maybe I just don't believe that anyone who's actively seeking therapy doesn't need it. I think it's like it's expensive, it's not fun, and if you're going consistently and you feel like you need it.

Maybe you need to know that you need to do prior research.

Like I think it should never be you should never be discouraged from doing it. Sure, you can go, and if they're a good therapist, then they'll kind of explain to you. They'll give you homework, and then if you don't want to do the homework, then you can go find someone else. But I don't think you should hold into your you know, if you really want to go, you should go, definitely. But I totally get taking up resources, but I think that's more of a.

It's an education. Is someone else gotta worry about that? Yeah?

Yeah, yeah, I mean it's neither here nor there. But I also think the moment that go to therapy turned into a catchphrase.

I feel like we were doomed from that point.

And I've been thinking a lot about how there's something about being a young person in the twenty first century and how we spend a lot of time knowing how to signal the right things to people as opposed to doing the right thing. So let's say you know you yourself a feminist. It signals the right thing, but do you know anything about feminism?

Actually?

Maybe maybe not? You signal that you are a liberal thinker, but like, how far does that go?

You know?

And so, as someone who likes words and likes to make sure that I'm using the right words to convey exactly what I think I feel like, sometimes we get stuck in like this communications cycle where we're trying to present the right thing without actually meaning what we're saying at all. And so when I was watching Love Island, a lot of the contestants were asked the same questions and like, I get to know them type.

Vibe, like what about islanders like?

And they were asked things like, you know, what are your turn ons?

What are your turnoffs?

And overwhelmingly everybody's turn off is like, oh, you know what, like when they're mean to the waiter, when they're mean to the waitress. And the thing about that is, I don't know very many people who are actually mean to the waiter a waitress. Like, think about your close circle of friends, even like the fringe trends, how many interactions have you truly had where someone's been mean to the waitress or waiter?

Not that many.

Yet everybody parrots this off like it's something that happened so frequently that we need to be on highlight. Oh no, don't go on a date with that guy. Could be mean to the waiter, mean to the waitress. And I keep thinking like, not only is that outdated because we're all hyper aware that we need to be nice to people in service based industries like tipping culture and all of that stuff, but also it's outdated.

What is actually a better judge of character, like I've said.

Before, is people who are nice to their AI bots, people who are nice to Siri, people are nice to Alexa. That is a better litmus test because something about being nice to a waitress. Of course, you know what to do in a social setting where you're being observed, where there are other people to keep you in line, where there are other people to signal that.

This is the right thing to do, this is the wrong thing to do.

When you're alone, when nobody's watching, when you have not been warned or taught or reared to do this right thing.

That's what I want to start looking at.

People who are like like the people who's instinct. Did you ever get that Smarter child or on your explaining for this Smarter Child on MSN, Yes, So smarter Child was a bot that you could speak to on EMSN if you went around for those times.

I can't even explain it to you.

Just like a chat bot and with no motivation, people would say the most heinous, abusive, sexist, racist.

Things to it.

It's a random bot with no agenda, and people are like, oh, let's get them, let's get him, let's get him. That. To me, these are some clear science and someone's not right not you saying please or thank you to someone

Yeah, it's like knowing that something's not controversial. But I say, like, shut up.

Like you know when people like you know, I just I just hate that, Like women have to deal with like beauty standards and stuff, and it's like, yeah, yeah, it's we hate it. Well, I'm watching you just be fairal it's a warning. It's a warning you have been worn. I'm not letting it slide anymore. I've been quite for too long.

Oh dear, this is flex and frooms.

On da Oh the internet is It's like Taylor Switch Internet right now. It's been a little while since somebody has dominated the Internet like that, a musician in particular us. Yeah, I feel like he's like always on to the point where he's kind of like people are numb to him, like what's he done now?

You know?

But I wasn't expecting so so of all, I did not know how prolific tailor Switch is. I'm a casual listener, you know what I mean, Like some songs really bop. I don't really resonate with her as a person, not really my archetype of woman, so I just kind of like exist on the periphery of her. But looking at number one, how many records she's broken with this new album release, and I'm like, whoa, she is the most She has the most streamed song in the world, and

Going to stop me?

Okay, what does that mean? What does that mean? Is that consensual? So basically what people do is they film themselves listening to the song, and in text, they write on the screen what they did relatively to acquire their current partner. Oh, I said, wow, wow, listen to this. Well, I'm going to read them out because you know, it's

For two years. Was it someone from Oh, we don't know? Okay? You like my mom?

When I show her? I mean, she's like, how do you know her? I don't, Mum, I don't know.

Okay. Here's another one.

When I was fifteen, there was this cute boy in my class, but he was super shy and I was too scared to talk to him, but I really wanted to. One day, I saw him like a meme on Facebook from the certain TV show that i'd never heard of.

End up watching up.

I ended up watching the entire TV show in one night, So the next time we were in class together, I could suddenly make a reference to the show, which led to our first conversation. It's now seven years later and we're married. I mean, this is just the graft. Yeah, it's not women grafed. We've all done it, done that. It's so like insidious, like it's so far from just getting to the point, like you just need to go straight through your going left, turning right, walking backwards, going forwards.

Like earnest connection connection with someone that.

Was random and out of the blue, and they're like, oh no, actually I made it this.

Way, thank you. Well, people can probably do that to you all the time.

I constantly have conversations with people on the apps where you know, it'd be like two dates in maybe three, and I'll be like they'll reference something that only someone who knows knows, you know, or like they'll reference something on the post or something and I'd be like, oh, you know, or someone who will call me lil Lil lil and then just call me flex randomly yeah.

Oh okay, so you know. Interesting.

But outside of the context of dating, people do that a lot. They will signal liking things in a way they think I like it. So, for example, like every I would say every second time I talk to a new person, they'll randomly bring up aliens.

It's like, okay, I get that econic.

Okay, cool, isn't it funny? Because it would seem so not obvious from that point of view. What do you mean, like someone bringing up aliens obviously don't think that it's obvious to you.

Yes, exactly. They think like, oh, this is so niche, Like she's going to know that. I'm like, you know, also a big thinker, and I'm like, everybody does this. It's aliens, it's twilight. It's like some kind of surface level personality test, surface philosophy, or like a reading out a question from my conversation card games back to.

Me like I didn't write that anyway. I like it. They're trying to connect. It's cute, but also more of this.

I need more people outing themselves on the internet for my enjoyment because I would never no, bring back nonchalance, bring.

Back personal space. Never. And privacy. Oh you want privacy back?

Yeah?

I think so flex and frooms so FLEXI.

Last week I told the story about the nipple hair in the nipple. If you want to google flexing Frooms nipple. I won't get into the story, yeah, because it's very alarming and disturbing, and it might HAPs anyway you get good content. But what it did do is it got me thinking about nipples in general. Oh okay, Now, nipples are very interesting personally. When I hear bad stori about nipples, I seize up. They're a very sensitive area of the body.

Would you agree that that kind of makes sense actually, because yeah, you're putting a hole through a hole, yeah, like a cross or maybe it kind of like you like want to pierce the nipple and it heels. It kind of blocks any flow of any liquid. Because I know they do say if you plan to breastfeed, you shouldn't get aniple piercing. I don't know why really, but then I've heard like they never really heal.

So what's the real story? Well, cop this.

I put up my story and said, what happens when you have a baby and the milk comes out when you've got a nipple piercing?

Does it come out like sprinkle? That's how you phrase it? Yeah, what happens when the milk comes out.

So I've got quite a few responses, but I'll read out two of them that I got.

That's the sut off. Like I got quite a few responses, I'll read out to Lisinda, good morning.

I have one nipple pierced, and I also lactate, but not secondary to pregnancy.

I've never had a kid.

After heaps of tests, my doctor's advice that everything looks normal, I probably need to stop expressing the milk because I'm training my body to keep doing it. Anyway, the milk squirts out all the same on both pierced and unpierced side, apparently no interference from the piercing whatsoever, although I acknowledge this is a slightly different circumstance, and people expressing milk when breastfeeding make more than I do, and therefore the

Apologies.

I have literally been thinking and honestly gagging about the nipple story all night long and was tossing up whether to tell you that the milk comes out of a million holes, regardless of a piercing. I saw someone already has lulls, so don't mind me. But another thing, breast milk. Milk can also come out of your armpits, and I kid you not, that is not even the half of them. When it comes to effing weed location facts, no one tells you about anyway.

I love the podcast. I love the word lactation.

So when you lax hate for a baby, it doesn't come out of the nipple in the middle of the areola.

It comes out of the whole areola.

Oh that's why when people get mastitis and the ducks are block Oh, terrifying.

Coming out of it.

Oh, don't make you sick. So if you got a nipple pissed, yeah, you're in the quarry. Don't Yeah, don't stress. It's not going to make you lactake in a weird way. It comes out of multiple places. It squirts out your breastmeme. It doesn't square out in a stream like like a shower.

It's a great time to learn this.

Also, someone said that breast milk tastes like it tastes nutty. Apparently it tastes metallic. Whoa so many other fluids. They say, mmm, no, that was a test. That was a test.

It's a test. Are you pass? That is a lot? I think?

Where are we out of our nipple era? Now that's the last we're going to discuss for now.

Yeah, I'd love to get into animal nipples more precisely, white as hua Us have eight nipples.

Yeah, we came out of cannibal as an era straight into therapy, straight into nipples.

What will be next? Chihuahua nipples?

Yes, no hardware, pole, smash, flex and fruit. I know millennials and Gen zs are getting stressed about the dating landscape. I know it's yeah, yeah, I've seen, I've heard, and if you're not stressed, its because you're in denyal apathetic.

But one thing I know about a human they.

Want to feel good. You know what it feels good being in love? Does you feel good searching for love? It's kind of lay, mostly embarrassing and sometimes fruitless. But every now and then the Internet's like, no, don't give up, We've got some new ideas for you. In today's ideas dating stamps. What do you think that means?

Oh?

Like when you have a passport? Okay, all like stamps when you get into the club.

Close you see if you just allow yourself, allow yourself to be a creative thinker, come out. So basically, a dating stamp is exactly what it sounds like. It's a stamp that you get, you know, made go to your local office works or something or Vista print and so on the stamp you get something printed into it, like.

What about are you single?

Question mark dm me on ig at flex dot mammy or Hi, I think you're cute dm me on Instagram at flex dot mammy. And then you see a hottie you stamp them and in a club environment, it's like so funny. What is go around stamping people having flippant interactions and then at the end of the night, if you someone thing's so cute, then you match.

Interesting in theory, how do you think? How do you feel about that if.

Someone came round with a stamp? But I think ill's doing this to everyone?

Yeah, is that not what dating apps are? Though?

I like to keep the illusion that they are the only one.

They made an account just to see if they could find you. Yeah, I think it's a lass and I think some that's what dating needs, a bit of humor and comedy. It's all getting a bit serious. And the stakes are getting really high. I want things to feel a little bit more like blase blah, nonchalant and the very least a good story.

Why do you who you're going out with? The guy got stamped by?

Why do you think it's becoming nonchalant dating line?

Now?

I don't think.

I think it needs to go back to being a little bit nonchalant. I think everything's got a little bit too serious. The stakes got really high. It's very age. I just think the landscape broadly, I feel like it's too many, too much, too many voices, opinions about the way it should be. So much multimedia, Like it's in songs, it's in movies, it's in TikTok, it's on social media app.

So many memes.

It's all just it's getting to a point where it's like, okay, like you mentioned dating, and someone's like, you're you gonna get gasolt, you're gonna get love bombed. You're gonna come back with like PTF and okay cool or or hear me out, could have a nice night, could be funny.

The pathologies, the pathologizing, the pathologization of dating, Yeah, is a real thing.

It's a real thing.

I wanted to be fun and light and loose, have a good story for the girls. Don't remember when you're like twenty and every weekend was like another story for the girls, like does something? What he? He?

Bring that back?

So will I get the stamp? No, but maybe I should. I think I would stamp in a different country.

One hundred percent, get it in like a few different languages, intercontinental stamping. Yeah, that's what I would do.

Probly get it for cheaper if you do a whole bunch of one literally different platforms as well, get all the platforms out there.

I wouldn't rule it out.

Maybe or just on a night out, all the girlies get a stamp.

See when you stamp at a festival.

Actually know we're on We're on the high end of the demographic for that one, the older end, the geriatric festival attendees. Anyway, it's a good idea, and for now we're just getting ideas going. It's hunting, busy buzz dating, dating stamps.

It's oh, don't know what else.

To be fair, it's shooting a shot in person or one hundred percent, just like going up to people in public being like, hey, I had a.

Few chances this weekend. I really didn't. Yeah you miss you don't take that's for sure.

See, I'm telling you I know a person who can't close on I see one.

Maybe next week I'll endeavor. How are you gonna work on it? Watch your plan? What is stopping from closing? Babe? Oh confusion? You've been listening to the Flex and Frooms Daily podcast.

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