Flex and Frooms Flex and Frooms.
This is the Flex and Frooms catch up podcast. Welcome to Wednesday. Yesterday. In the podcast intro, we were talking about how builders and other trades people are superior perhaps and flixy. It got me thinking, would you go on celebrity Apprentice?
No, really, too much work. I told you, I don't want to work hard. It's just I mean, I don't want to do hard work. I want to work hard. I want to do hard work. And I think that I've set myself up so the work that I'm doing is easy for me to execute, Like I'm using all my natural skills. For someone doing a podcast or public speaking, it would be a difficult thing to do. It's a very simple thing for me to do, and so I want to do that. I'm like, they caught me at
a wrong time. Ask me four years ago when I was on my rise and grindhustle culture. I'm like, yeah, I'll try it, and half try it now these says, I'm like too fragile, too sensitive. Really yeah, And I also just want to balance the scales. I said, in the last ten years of my life trying to be really proficient professionally, and would be a proficient person.
Good on you.
Let's get to the podcast, Okada, Flex and Frooms, Flex and Frooms. As you know, it's breakup season and also engagement season. It happens, you know, at the same time for obvious reasons if you really think about it. But we won't. We won't. A couple of weeks ago I talked about how if you happened to it, proposed to and call off the engagement, do you have to give
back the ring? Is the ring a gift or almost you know, a mmm, like collateral or like a gift subject to the marriage actually happening, and if it doesn't happen, you must give the gift back. Well, we had someone who's called in to give us their hot take on how shit all go.
Let's go.
So when my nan was young, being twenty seven meant you were on the shelf aka absolutely no good brought in goods about to expire. Her fiance had gone and got a lady up the duff, so that relationship was well and truly done. So I'm not sure whether her keeping the engagement ring was a mistake or traumat tax. I'd like to think the latter, thank you very much, But What happened next is what you could say is the cherry on top of a very cheap Bullies mudcake.
I won't get into the kit store of how my grandparents met, but not too long after the engagement falling apart, my grandfather did appear on the scene. He was a refugee and couldn't afford much, let alone speak English very well, so when it came to locking my Aussie nan down, he basically was like, Cath, why would I buy you a new ring when you already have one.
It was a true upcycle moment.
I don't know how she didn't get the ear immediately, but I guess when you're twenty seven, you've got to take what you can get.
Can I just say, impeccable story? Tear?
When you write that down?
Are you reading some of that woman in That doesn't even sound red? That just sounded like beautiful pace, intelligent intention, an intelligent queen, if you absolutely. I love viewing the ring as traum attacks because it goes on both ends. As I was saying, let's say in a as you love them so dearly heterosexual relationship community, the man is proposing to the woman and saying with this gift I give to you on the occasion that we do actually
get married. This is your little gift, right, but as a person on the receiving end, like it is my gift, and if for some reason you do something that makes me unable to redeem the next part of my gift, the wedding band and the marriage, then I should be entitled to take. This is a deposit. Yeah, it's non refindby.
It's a laby look like this ring.
For example, I got a ring on my finger, Yeah, beautiful. I think my dad got this three his ex girlfriend and then they broke up, and then he met my mum that Saturday, and he's worn this on his pinky finger on her on the show call her at by name literally anyway, it's very like it's a weird looking ring.
It's a gorgeous ring that I couldn't describe it, but you'll just you have to see it to believe it. I will say though, that it takes a certain amount of lack of shame to ask for the ring back. Isn't it shameful enough that I've called off the engagement? But I guess pettiness will really feel anyone to do the craziest things.
Fully, it's very it's very emotionally. It's an emotional piece of jewelry, that's for sure. Also, can we just really quickly say we won't go into it. But how did all of our grandparents just meet people like the next day after breaking up with their partners?
They got near it?
What the hell? Guys?
They went to social events, they were part of their community. They were trapped in their two bedroom, one bathroom, mold infested in a city apartment with the roommate they met on face for who works full time so they never see each other.
I want to go back. Let's go back in time, guys, let's all go back in time.
I don't know if I want to go Thank you. I don't know if I want to get.
This is flex and Frooms on kit Flexi. We're going to be talking about wiki how. There's a website called wiki how. Yes, it's Wikipedia mixed with how to do things. And this one actually doesn't come from Wiki how. This comes from my very own brain. So Flexi, I have come up with a genius way to figure out what the best photo of me is to then put up on Instagram. Great, you're on a dating app, right, and it's Hinge. Let's just use that as an example. Do
you want not from personal experience? And obviously with Hinge there's a function to like answers or photos. So what I've done is I've created a Hinge account with five different photos of myself, and what I'm doing is trying to figure out what I should put on my Instagram. And what I do is I go through and you're.
Soft launching to a bunch of strangers men and then taking that data to then hard posts on your Instagram.
Yeah, it's genius. So I put up like a few photos myself smiling, and the one that got the most likes is me in a lemon shirt, smiling, full beat on my face, not messing about. And I got the most likes of the men. And it wasn't the first photo. It was about three down, so you know, they really assessed all options and thought that's the one I'm attracted to. If so facto new profile pick uploaded.
See, I don't know. I don't know. I feel like on dating apps in particular, people act in a contrary way. So usually people like you don't want to light the first one because it feels like you didn' look through the profile. You know you don't like the sexiest one because it makes you look like a like a horn dog, right, you don't want to like Usually the ones that are hot in hot in a way that's hot to like fellow chicks is going to be like your fashion one
or like you know, your colored lenses polaroid moment. You know, how do I say this in a way that's not gonna offend men? I don't feel like men broadly have the best assessment on what I look the best as interesting? Do you know what I mean? Like, I don't feel like when I'm wearing what I would deem to be like my best fit with my best hair, the average man would be like, yeah, that's sick, not my demographic.
They're not here for the jawts.
Yeah. So then I feel like it's odd to use the demographic of strangers who aren't seeing you in a neutral way. By the way, dating apps and inherently is sexualized. True, and they're like mating purposes, So you're taking their assessment of you to go to an audience people who know you and like you, and have them decide where you look best. They're probably wrong.
Well, I'm not saying me specific, What about the person?
Who are you not saying? This is not personal evidence, it's not research gathered from.
You, research from years ago.
I like it, though, I just don't think it's I don't think it'd be accurate, but I think it's interesting.
Well let's say the photo yeah, well no, because it's from years ago. Wink wink.
Now are you u thinking photos from years ago on your dating app? That is crazy? You photos can't be older than one year.
I agree to one year. Even too much.
Changes in one year, especially like I don't want to see one photo where you're bald versus one photo and you've got sixteen inches of hair.
How do you think I go with my ever changing hair?
If the hair is ever changed because you change it frequently, that's fine. That's a horny photo. Ill you're sick. She's doing dog chest out blue eyeshadow. Think they're not thinking about the blue eye shadow based from the ninety when they're having their first exclamation, get out of here. Cut the cameras, flex and fromes. You're listening to flex and firms.
What the frick?
We have yet another moral dilemma. This one is quite good because I feel like if you fancy yourself a person with taste, yep, then you might have gone through this experience. Imagine you have a good friend who's romantically interested in one of your other friends. You know, they're part of the general friend network, and this good friend wants you to hook them up or at least do the intro get some wheels moving. The issue is you don't think these two people would be a good coupleikes like,
you're like pretty certain. You're like, it's not gonna work. Bro, what do you do?
We've all been here, have we? Yeah, we actually have.
We reside here, we pay rent.
I've been on literally all three sides of the coin now. And I will say there is a feeling of indignation when your friend won't hook you.
Up, like what are we doing?
Is? I know, especially when there has been a vibe that has been observed by all parties. I don't want to use the term colock clock use it and yeah here.
We are use it.
It's the most classic of the term. I will say. I think if you're let's say the person who can hook it up the middle person, the middle person is saying go go stop, I think they will usually know the best parts of each person, so I will trust their judgment.
Can I quickly interject, please, my hand is up. I feel I agree with you, but I want a devil's advocate. I want to do my second year philosophy. Bro, you're the person in the middle only knows those two people in a specific platonic context. I know bunch of people who are currently romantically involved that I would never place. I would say the majority of my friends who who have found themselves in a new relationship and it happens to be with another friend, I would have never called it.
I'm like every time like you two wow, wow wow, wow wow wow.
Have I ever been in a relationship like that where people like, oh this is YouTube yeh yeah.
No, not like a boyfriend and girlfriend, but definitely like a an entanglement where everyone's.
Like, damn he really did that want him?
Wow? Interesting? Interesting. So I will say that, like, being the decider is not great because you don't actually know what this person is like in a romantic context. I will say, though, the best thing you can do is cavea or like disclaim and say, hey, like, I don't really know their situation. I don't know if they're dating anyone. I don't know if you're dating anyone. I don't know if they're keen. But like here, like I'll start a chat or whatever, Like I'll intro and then leave me
out of it. Like you have to be dip in and dip out. You cannot be doing handholding Cupid checking in or whatever, because more often than not, it does not work. And I think by remaining the middleman, it gives both parties, or at least you a good friend, more hope that the vibe is stronger than it is, because if the vibe was not strong, you would say so right wrong. I would not say so if one of my friends said I'm keen on your other friend, I know for a fact the other friends would never borrow,
never borrow, go there. I'm not letting you know that. That's for you to find out on your own, in a far nicer way than I could probably tell you.
I hate it.
It's not great. Get on the app scales, nice, let's get off the apps. Let's go to a let's go to a bar. I will say, here's how we avoid this situation in future. It's not relying on one person to do the intro. It's about creating environments where mutual friends can hang out with mutual friends to it, you know what I mean? Like we did look at an annual or like a fortnightly Sunday sesh. Everyone come to
this bar. You don't need the event. You'll know we'll be there every Sunday long lunch vibes, pop in, pop out, and do a casual intro. How good would that be?
I feel like the girls and the gays in the LGBTQI community the honerfectly, they got it puffed off on a Sunday. They've got the bearded tit. They regularly congregate. So we need to learn a thing or two, folks. Yeah, this is flex and frooms on kDa. You're back with fn F. I know it's not a swear word. How to think a flop and flopinder you when you flop era? Right now? Flex sleigh era or neutral pre sleigh pre SLA.
I had a sleigh, definitely, there's been a significant sleigh at say in the last two years. It's been an but I think I have another sleigh coming. I don't know. It could be like Q one twenty four, or it could be earlier.
I was talking a week to week personal sleigh basis.
Oh then yeah, we're slaying hell yeah yeah.
Flex. The great thing about having a public Instagram and people who.
Follow it and a personal brand, what it is.
That is you get people messaging you with dreams that they've had about you. Now, it freaks me out to think that people would ever think of us outside of when I'm thinking about them. However, if there's one exception to the rule, it's dreams because they're inconsequential and they perhaps a psyche based and like, no one's ever going to send me a dream and be like, you're in this dream and you did this really bad thing. Oh, people have definitely sent me that. Oh oh well, I
got one from a listener. I won't say their name. It's just like, as soon as I hear Frooms, I had a dream about you last night, my heart just flutters and I think, let me lick.
They're obsast with me.
Let me soak this up with a little piece of bread. Okay, Rooms had a dream about you and Flex last night. We were in Paris. Your hair was blonde again and you were wearing green and orange. Very you, very Eliza Thornberry vibes specific Flex was. Flex was not coping with driving on the opposite side of the road, and we had multiple small road accidents.
Ah, okay, okay, relax.
No one seemed that worried about trashing the car God complex, We'll be right. A childhood friend was being very mean to me. I haven't thought about her in years, but she always had mean girlfriend of me vibes a dog, and I was worried she would destroy all of my things in the hotel. Flex told me to stop worrying and wanted to go to a bar.
Flex said, anyway, respectfully.
Unfortunately the bar was a dad but the cocktails were nice. You were very relaxed and chatty, cool girl vibes. Yes, Flex was being a demon. I added that bit. I woke up with a headache. Not sure what it all means.
Oh, woke up in real life or in the dream.
In real life? Okay, probably that I need to take ubers in foreign countries. Needless to say, everyone looked very hot.
I love that. There's a lot to work with, there a lot to work for.
This is a terrible driver who is inconsiderate.
And see, I didn't get that. I didn't get that. I got Flex is willing to go with the flow and understand that a few nicks and dings on the way is just part of the journey. Flex also understands that a bad vibe is contagious and didn't want to affect the trip for everybody else. Flex also knows that sometimes the girls you need to get amongst them are optional. Just like a cute environment, cute outfit, cute music, cute people, feels good. Flex wants kip the energy.
Up and for me is coolgo with chatty vibes.
Yeah, which is so crazy that they would say that.
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