Is Dark Humour An Ick or Red Flag? 🚩 - podcast episode cover

Is Dark Humour An Ick or Red Flag? 🚩

Sep 09, 2022•31 min
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Episode description

Flex & Froomes chat about approaching someone who gave you a greasy look, and whether dark humour is an ick or a red flag. Plus, it turns out working only one day a week is good for you.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Transcript

Speaker 1

The Flex and Rooms Daily podcast.

Speaker 2

Hello, sweet Angels, It's Flex and Froom's podcast edition. This week, I am telling you about this show I watch Little Fires Everywhere by the author celesng It's the series adaptation. I haven't read the book, and I think it's too late for me. I don't want to consume the same bits of media in two different ways, especially because you've said that the series differs from the book even worse, I don't want to know what it could have been.

Speaker 3

I know what it was.

Speaker 2

It's I'm trying to do this thing where I don't make every enjoyable thing I do monetizable in any capacity, and so oh, I just share them in a social way that is for me and my faves. And so when I watched this show, my instinct was to tell the Internet about it in detail, and I didn't knowing that I would fire enjoy telling rooms about it now.

Speaker 3

So that's what you're gonna hear next Lot a Pleasure.

Speaker 1

Flex Androms FLEXI.

Speaker 4

A few days ago, I was telling you about my Little lum Oh yeah, my fun times on Facebook Marketplace. I haven't been sleeping, so instead I've been quelling my brain by going on Facebook marketplace, And.

Speaker 2

If you know someone who has a magenta Persian rug for through me in pretty neat condition, please reach.

Speaker 5

Out please, I'm desperate.

Speaker 4

Anyway, when I was looking for some rugs, I came across this other Facebook marketplace find. It was a pink, hot, hot, pink bedside table.

Speaker 3

You're in the hot pink.

Speaker 5

I just my eyes are attracted to pink. What can I say?

Speaker 3

It's your favorite color?

Speaker 1

It is.

Speaker 4

So this is the thing that I found. It is can't see the item anymore, but the title is three tier Compo Nibbily style cabinet.

Speaker 5

Do you know what they are? Yeah?

Speaker 2

So it's like these cylindrical cute retro cabinets and they have these sliding doors and these holes look like eyes.

Speaker 3

They're cute.

Speaker 2

They're cute, and most of the replica in the market. You can get a cute one for like fifty bucks if you really want to very accessible.

Speaker 4

So I'm always on the fence about these cabinets because I was always been in the always looking for a bedside table. I don't want the mid century it's been for me. Then the other day I bought one that's black with like a wood top and a little bit for books. It actually looked like it's meant for a kid's bedroom. So it's not very sophisticated. It's not hitting the brief. I don't know what I want to say, bedside table. So I came across.

Speaker 3

Tables are hard to buy it so hard, they're really hard.

Speaker 5

Anyway, came across this one. You can see FLEXI. It's a hot pisk, very cute, one of those.

Speaker 3

Have you been screened at the moment? You sent four texts? No response?

Speaker 5

This is the thing.

Speaker 3

It hurts, doesn't it?

Speaker 5

Message?

Speaker 3

Welcome you just like me?

Speaker 5

You have this too?

Speaker 3

You just like me?

Speaker 5

I measure like, Hey D, where did you purchase this? Originally? It's a fake?

Speaker 2

Whoa? Why are you coming out the gate with an attitude that attitude? Hey, I hope you're going well, really love this piece. Just wanted to know where you purchased it from.

Speaker 3

Originally. I know i'd screen your message for sure. Well, I just why you want my data? You're my bank statement?

Speaker 4

Then he didn't reply next day, hey D, I'm keen to purchase this. Just interesting where it's from? Originally?

Speaker 5

Thanks? No reply? Next manage your business, hey G.

Speaker 4

Just trying one more time, and then I send him, you can do this offer thing on Facebook.

Speaker 5

Mic close. So you send an offer? Yeah, send the offer then for how much? Fifty five? Just what it was there for?

Speaker 3

Yeah? Nice?

Speaker 5

He replies, When and where will you pick up dot? Oh?

Speaker 4

And I said Alexandria because I said it was in Alexandria. No reply, one hour later, I can come this afternoon, didn't reply, one hour later, au tomorrow morning, no reply. Then this morning I said, hey, d is this sold? I'm happy to pay a high price.

Speaker 5

It's sold. I had lots of people wanting it. End of conversation.

Speaker 3

I own one I can give to you.

Speaker 2

It's blue, though I don't know if you're in a market for a cobalt blue.

Speaker 5

I mean i'd consider it. I'll bite off you.

Speaker 4

I wanted the hot pink though, I know, I know. Can you send me a photo of the blue one?

Speaker 5

Please? Yeah?

Speaker 4

So alas, I'm learning, you're right, I should be nicer in Facebook message, just regarding Facebook marketplace, but often I just don't want to be too nice. I've learnt in sales, don't be a pushover. You've got to meet them with aggression, and then when you meet them they'll be like, oh my god, she's such a nice woman.

Speaker 5

That's on that.

Speaker 3

That is a good tip, though.

Speaker 2

I will say I told you a couple of weeks ago that I've been having issues with getting trades to my house to fix things, or just agreeing to any time I'll send four messages in a row and get screens, and another three get screen. But in that instance, when I was leading with cute, jovial manners, no response. As soon as you get terse the responses are flying in. The job's getting done. I don't like what that's telling me, but it's just information. Do with it what you will.

Speaker 1

Flex and frooms.

Speaker 2

This article on CNBC says work is good for you, but only one day a week, scientists say, and it was published in twenty nineteen, in the month of June. They say that working eight hours a week is the quote unquote commended dose for optimum mental well being. According to British scientists who surveyed more than seventy one thousand working age people in the UK over a nine year period, this is a serday.

Speaker 3

None of them rinky dinks. We got a couple hundred people.

Speaker 5

This is an instable.

Speaker 3

Yeah, not an instable.

Speaker 2

They put in work with it. So what they tried to measure was your anxiety and your sleep habits, and your general perspective on your life based on how much or how little you work, to see if there was any correlation that could be actually measured, not just presumed. And so they noticed when people worked one day a week that their risk of mental health problems reduced by an average of thirty percent.

Speaker 5

Wow.

Speaker 2

But if they worked any more than one day a week or eight hours, there was no measurable impact on the quality of their mental health improving. It kind of stayed in the state that it was in. So if it's terrible, then it stayed kind of terrible. If it was average, it stayed kind of average. And so if we're looking at work as a tool to improve our well being physically, socially, culturally, mentally, then working more than one day a week is never going to hit.

Speaker 3

It for you.

Speaker 5

We're going to change that, according to this study, abolish to get the four day work week. I think there's like chat that that could come in, Yeah, one day work, Well.

Speaker 2

Let's just go straight to the source one day. Because if we start implementing these things small, small four days, next ten years three days next ten years, let's just get to it.

Speaker 3

We're trying to go.

Speaker 4

They're going to be retired by then, yeah, and I need I need help now, and by then.

Speaker 5

I want someone to look after me. So we'll bump back up to five days, of course.

Speaker 2

So the point is, though, what jobs can we do for eight hours a week that are going to fund our life styles nowhere that we need it to. That's an important question number two. As you said, if we all start working eight hours a week, who's making us nas, who's delivering the orders, the online shopping? Everything has to change to accommodate this.

Speaker 4

Who's delivering my youth foods? Apparently it is just one day week because I didn't deliver my food last week.

Speaker 3

Really yeah, thet a little refund.

Speaker 5

I just couldn't. I was like, this is a sign from God. It's not for me.

Speaker 3

It's yeah, I.

Speaker 4

Could be open in future brand sponsors, but it wasn't meant to be at that time.

Speaker 2

So yeah, that's a hot tip. I love studies and facts.

Speaker 3

I love this.

Speaker 2

Obviously, it'd be interesting to see how the study would change. Measuring Australians, all Americans, people in African countries who knows could be could be heaps interesting. But for now, just know that if you're assuming that more work is going to make you more mentally sound, the studies are saying that it's incorrect and contradictory.

Speaker 1

Bastards, all right, this is flex and frooms.

Speaker 2

I was recommended to watch Little fires everywhere. The thing about me is, I don't really think I'm too about media generally.

Speaker 3

Like I have.

Speaker 2

Said verbatim, I watch a lot of bad shows. I watch a lot of bad movies. I'm not like, I don't mind. I don't care if the acting is a bit off. I don't care if the dub is bad. I'm just here to enjoy. To me in the background, anyway, I would say that if a show is too good, I don't want to watch it. Like Game of Thrones, I haven't watched past season two because I have to commit. I can't be on my phone. I need to know

the characters and how they're connected. And that's just too much to what I watched TV for.

Speaker 3

But this one, in.

Speaker 2

Particular, I hadn't googled what it was about, just somebody had recommended it, not even knowing my taste. I think so I thought put in the background. It's not even for me anyway, And I did, and I remember it's the show's Little fires everywhere. It's got Reese Witherspoon and Kerry Washington. I watched it on Amazon Prime, but I'm not sure else you can watch it. Oh and if in case you're interested, I got seven point seven out of ten on IMDb, seven nine percent on Rotten Tomatoes.

I don't know if that's good or bad. I've been known to watch a five.

Speaker 3

It's all good. But it's actually based off a book.

Speaker 5

Is it the same woman who wrote Beg Little Lives? I think it is.

Speaker 3

Let me nah. That was by Leanne Moriarty and this is by Celeste Energy.

Speaker 5

Oh.

Speaker 2

Yes, it's based in the book by the same name. And it's an eight episode mini series. And the premise follows the intertwined fates of the picture perfect Richardson family and an enigmatic mother and daughter who up end their lives. The story explores the weight of secrets, the nature of art and identity, the ferocious pool of motherhood, and the

danger in believing that following the rules can avert disaster. Honestly, had I read that before I watched it, I would have been more interested because when I press play, I'm like, Okay, this is like a Stepford Housewives, white picket fence, perfect family type vibe. But then as we got to just the climax of the show, when you realize why we've watched six episodes so far, I was like, oh, wow,

we really are talking about little fires everywhere. This idea that if you do not put out the fire, like the figurative fire, if you do not you know, if you do not tell the truth, or if you do not have the hard conversation, if you do not tell someone how you feel, then in trying to avoid that fire, it's gonna keep growing. That's what fires do. You turn your back to a little fire, it's not just gonna

go away in its own time. It's wafting, it's gathering, it's tindering, it's flaming, and it will continue to grow because just by nature, it's what fires do. And so after having and generally I would pose these questions to the internet, I would be like, I watched this movie or this TV show and I have thoughts as talk about it, but I'm more interested in that I'd rather have this conversation with you. But when I had some moment to myself, I was thinking, when is it a

good time to put out a little fire? Because I just think you the more you think you can control unavoidable things, the more unhappy you get, because you start to blame yourself for everything that goes wrong in your life. Why didn't I do this sooner? Why didn't I ask this person this question? Why did I make that decision? Some things just happen, But in particular, if you don't put out little fires when they pop up, then what is the consequence?

Speaker 3

And what is that? A learn from this? Living an honest life is horr.

Speaker 5

It's simply too much.

Speaker 4

Can I just tell everybody flex is currently looking very comfortable?

Speaker 3

Oh, I'm bush picking so hard.

Speaker 4

She's got a gray mile track sit on, which is a fantastic gray.

Speaker 5

I must say. You're sitting on a high chair and then you put your feet.

Speaker 3

On another chair and no shoes, of course, not very much. I'm not a bush pit. I wouldn't put shoes on the chair.

Speaker 2

But you do have socks, yeah, and these are fresh socks, you even, But I'm just like legs spread or maybe they're elongated.

Speaker 3

I think you can tell in my tone, and you don't have a good time.

Speaker 5

I'm doing these. I got my chins resting on two hands that I've got a hunch back.

Speaker 3

It's giving sulky.

Speaker 2

I want to read out this note I made after watching the full season immediately, it's like a two am note or Yeah, and so I said, little fires everywhere? Is it better to speak or die? Because that's a common phrase idiom cliche, those little moments in life where you betray yourself or you make a bad decision you don't know how to unravel yourself from eventually go to create little fires everywhere. When you choose not to speak,

you avoid putting yourself at risk to hypothetically avoid hurt. However, the question becomes which is more painful, rejection or regret? Wow, And I wanted to leave it there because you know, if you can only imagine if I was like, let's talk about this thing on a thing, and then you know what would starts like me just watching the show and enjoying myself turned into like this discourse that I

want to have. But I do want to hear from you about this idea of self betrayal because I find that I do it more often than I want to. And that's because you just can't anticipate what the outcome of a decision is going to be.

Speaker 5

Right, So would an example be you take a job, for example, that you're not quite sure.

Speaker 2

On a small scale, like let's say, you know, somebody really wants to be my friend, and I'm like, I've got all the friends I need, But who am I to say no to someone who earnestly wants to create a connection with me? Right, And so I might agree to go to a lunch, what's the big deal? But then I go to the lunch and it's insufferable. They really rude or we just don't vibe as people, but

they feel really connected. And now I have to one soft ghost them or two, you know, create this environment where I'm telling this person they're not quote unquote good enough to be my friend. That just feels like an over commitment for what I didn't even want to do in the first place. And so not honoring that first ping of being like, ugh, I didn't really want to do this now created a little fire. And the longer that I leave that brewing and to gather energy and

all that, it's getting out of hand. And when it's a good time to tell this person, oh wait, this is not gonna work out. That's one example of that, And I've done it so many times in my life where I'm like, I'll just let this simmer.

Speaker 3

And then boom, it doesn't simmer. It turns into a wildfire.

Speaker 4

Yeah. I mean this is a tricky one though, because I get what you mean. Like I've met people in the past and we've semi vibes and then you know, they want to hang out more. I want to hang out more and it doesn't work. It's a tricky one because I think sometimes you have that impulse to not want to see the person again next minute. It's just because you were in a funny way, so you've got to take the leap. I think that's what you mean

as well. We'd like speak or die? Yeah, is it keep quiet or die or speak or die?

Speaker 2

I think it's speak or die. I think it wasn't Coolly by your name, but I didn't watch that. But so this idea of like self betrayal, like do you follow like the initial ping of like I don't want to do that? Should that be enough to govern the decisions you make? Just like I don't want to. I don't feel like it. I'm not comfortable, or even the feeling that you can't put a phrase behind it just gave me a weird vibe. Right, should that be enough?

Or should we be able to see things through so we can know for sure.

Speaker 3

That it right?

Speaker 5

I think your instincts oft and right.

Speaker 4

And like you say, if you see things through, you get too deep to you can't do this seft ghost. But it's not really worth it to hurt someone's feelings because you're not really hurt them. There's nothing worse than

being rejected in a friend space or in any context. Right, this idea, because when I think about self betrayal, that is so unique, Like you don't know in any given day how far, Like you don't even know what you want generally, right, Like I could want a ton of things, I could not want a ton of things, and so I don't even know when I'm doing things I don't want to do until I've probably done them, and then

in retrospect being like, okay, that wasn't for me. But with that in mind, it's almost like reversing the cliche, like you know, all experience is good experience or honestly, is the best policy. It's like, is it, like, what would life be like we just trusted yourself fully to be Like I caught a vibe.

Speaker 2

I'm following the vibe that to know from me. I'm not doing that. I'm not going there, I'm not interested in that. I'm choosing to do what I want because I want feels very brave but also really limiting.

Speaker 4

Rereads a certain personality or it's like certain personality people do that and it's good if you always like that.

Speaker 5

People just expecting it.

Speaker 4

Like I've got friends and I'm like, I know you're gonna do what you want, and that's cool because that's you.

Speaker 5

It's hard when you're trying to incorporate this later in your life. Literally, hmm.

Speaker 3

It's a tricky one.

Speaker 4

Can we also talk about Kerry Washington's mouth acting and it's just gone all around the internet.

Speaker 2

But Chause, Yeah, she's a very particular math actor and I think she I've only seen her in Scandal, and I feel like, based on what I've seen from her acting, she plays the same character, which I love for her because she does it well. But just like really intelligent scorned woman. Yeah, someone's gonna do it and so does Reese Witherspooner this rat. I don't know her story though, but I really recommend the show. Not I like this show as it is, but I wouldn't stop what you're

doing to go and watch it. Need a background show, chuck it on. And I think it's a nice thinking show in terms of trying to put yourself in the perspective of any of those characters and saying, well, what would I do?

Speaker 3

Because stuff is too complex?

Speaker 2

And I give it credit for and then I think, wow, real people are living complex lives too, not just fictional characters. I must be more empathetic, true shocking.

Speaker 1

This is Flex and Froomes On.

Speaker 2

Last week we talked about the distinction between an ike and IRK and a red flag. I have forgotten what they are, but that doesn't matter because I was explaining how some X can be IRK, some X can be also red flags. They are separate but can have some correlations, and you said, well, what's an example of that? And I said, well, I could imagine for me, like a having dark humor is a red flag, but I can imagine for other people that is a green flag or at the very worst, an ick. And you said, well,

what I love dark humor. That is a green flag for me. I would look highly of someone with dark humor as their preference. So let's get into it and to put context around dark humor, let me not explain it myself. Let's see what the Internet says incredible. We can use that as our basis. Dark humor, also known as dark comedy, is a style of comedy that makes light of subject matter that is generally considered taboo, particular subjects that are normally considered serious or painful to discuss.

With my experience of people eligible people using dark humor, they use it as maybe a opportunity to be racist, sexist, homophobic without consequence, because you just don't get the joke, you know, like yeah, it's like anybody would say that, anybody would think they'll lighten up or whatever. I haven't had personal experience with dark humor that hasn't been anything that's not sus and as quite a jokey person. Like if I'm in a social environment, I'm doing cackles, cackles, cackles.

I recognize that I might make people comfortable enough to just like say what they want and how they feel, because like, oh, that's what we're doing here, right, I'm like, that's what we're doing and I've seen too much. Thank you for your service. What is your definition of dark human? Does differ from my experience with that? It does differ

for me. Dark humor is like British humor. It's making fun of things that are taboo in a human way, not in a social way, for example, making light of death or other universal experiences.

Speaker 4

I find British shows do it always really well because they're stylistic and real and there's no happy ending. Like to me, dark humor is not having any happy ending. It's not corny, so I find it. I like watching dark humor.

Speaker 5

But as I'm getting older, would I want to date somewhere with dark humor?

Speaker 4

Like I've gone on dates with people that are yeah, do do have dark humor and kind of like sadistic or you know what I mean, Like they're kind.

Speaker 2

Of it's a bit red hot, unwell or joking. Is this a cry for help?

Speaker 3

Twice?

Speaker 4

Because I have been that person as well, and I don't want to be around that as I get older, So I see the appeal of it. I don't think it's a red flag. I think it's just a preference that I wouldn't want to be around. But I've also been the girly to want that. You know, It's one of those things I wish I was with some edgy like in that way. Who's because I think you have

to be somewhat self aware. But then you've got people that do duckhument that are not at all I think they're the types you're discussing.

Speaker 5

Yeah, yeah, it was probably nick for me.

Speaker 2

Now, yeah, I'm so sorry to do that for you on any given day.

Speaker 3

And here's the thing.

Speaker 2

The reason why I'm I'm being quite specific about it in the context of dating is that I don't like ambiguity in dating anymore. I think knowing exactly what I don't want is helping me see what I do want, and being indifferent about too many things has put me in too many environments that could have been avoidable, you

know what I'm saying. So instead of being like, oh, I want someone who's funny, Okay, funny is broad, so like let's narrow it down, and being like, okay, well, humor is good, I like, like sarcasm can be quite funny, or being really witty and quick and punny.

Speaker 3

I don't even mind.

Speaker 2

But then we get down to you know, I think about and I watch a lot of comedy on TikTok when it comes up and I'm like, I get it, but it's not funny, and I laugh so much that I'm like, I don't want to sit and watch comedy and not laugh. I don't understand why I'm not getting it, Like I think if I saw a comedian, I'd be like, itsen no, because if it's gonna be this me wanting to like ha ha, and I'm not even getting.

Speaker 3

Like a scoff It's not gonna work for me, babe.

Speaker 5

It's different.

Speaker 3

It's different, breath.

Speaker 2

I need conversational funny, just in an everyday conversation. Can you make one laugh?

Speaker 3

Not just me? Everyone once, everybody doing a little giggle, giggle if they interact with you.

Speaker 5

It's such a different thing.

Speaker 4

One is like, I don't know if you've been on a date with the comedian, but you can tell when they're trying to test their material. It's doing bits so disturbing. It's like, and you're not even gonna pay.

Speaker 5

For the dinner.

Speaker 1

Seriously, a statistic.

Speaker 5

It doesn't feel good.

Speaker 1

You're listening to flex and frooms.

Speaker 4

Okay, everybody who listens to this show and the podcast knows one thing and one thing only. I'm a Karen. Karen is like my star sign, and I'm a Fruomi rising.

Speaker 2

Oh for sure. And we have to emphasize that. People think that I am the one who made you a Karen, like I called you a Karen and thus your identifying as such. No, no, no, that's one of the core of Rumi's being. I'm even learning it for the first time.

Speaker 3

With you.

Speaker 5

You're often disagreeing with me. You say, Karen a little angel.

Speaker 3

Sometimes the Karen comes out.

Speaker 5

I'm like, see it in the eyes.

Speaker 3

It's always when you it's when you were like, you know, you just call the police station.

Speaker 1

You want what are you talking about?

Speaker 4

Well, sometimes I use the Karen for good and I use it for empowerment. Yes, a few weeks ago, I was talking at an event. It was just me on a stage and half an hour to Phil. I like public speaking, but even when you're public speaking, it's quite difficult. In a small room of people, you're talking and you're looking at everyone in the eye. A certain amount of times, like it's a bit sexy. I'm cognizant of everybody who

is watching, trying to keep them engaged. Anyway, I was probably like halfway through his talk and I thought I was doing really well, and I look out to the audience and I made a joke and this man in the audience kind of like in the middle of the audience threw his hands up in the air, kind of like what oh, and looked at me like kind of like you know when you like a bicep curl, like.

Speaker 3

Like what is this?

Speaker 2

Kind of like e motion with the flick of the part, like oh, what is this? But with two hands?

Speaker 5

Two hands kind of like that emoji.

Speaker 2

I don't know what situation I would be and to make me raise both of my hands to do that, right?

Speaker 3

Can you What was the vein of the joke? Do you do? You remember?

Speaker 5

It was like, oh, you know, and that person talks so much.

Speaker 3

Okay, so it doesn't sound really No, it was.

Speaker 5

It was not offensive at all. It was it was a dig at myself.

Speaker 3

Oh it's like a quip.

Speaker 5

It was a quip, yeah, harmless quick, yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4

Something to tack on to the ends. Literally, I'm punctuation hafling. And anyway, then I'm thrown off by that. Oh, because you notice that when it happened. Yeah, I'm literally this is in real time. My midway through a sentence, I had to just collect my thoughts and continue the talk.

Speaker 3

NDS one second, was he sitting or standing?

Speaker 5

He was sitting. This is a sitting down event.

Speaker 2

So sitting at the front or at the back. I'm just trying to picture. Did anybody else see him do this? He's sitting in the middle. The people that were my friends who came were in the front. Oh, so no one was behind him or around him. Really Okay, I finished the talk, I will walk out.

Speaker 4

It went really well. I've got lots of praise. But then I go to my friend. I'm like, did you see that guy? She's like nah, I'm like, this guy did this thing. I don't know if I'm being crazy, and she's like, oh, no, that's probably nothing. But I keep seeing him around. This is a long event that we're at, like multiple talks. I keep seeing him around the event, and it's bugging me, like, yeah, what was that?

Speaker 3

Because now he's in your history. Yeah.

Speaker 2

When the history books right about through me and this event, they'll mention the weird guy who put his hands up. Who shook them in disbelief as you were speaking, making like quips. It's not good.

Speaker 3

Now you're intertwined. I will be intertwined with this guy. Is this guy?

Speaker 5

It's not part of the narrative.

Speaker 3

Yeah, delete it.

Speaker 4

I'm sitting with my friends. I'm like, what am I gonna do about this? This is really gonna bug me. I feel like I need to go up to him.

Speaker 2

Oh this is good, and this is like I'm loving this quality about you. Go you.

Speaker 4

So I'm like, something happened there. What's the worst that can happen? I go up to him and he says, yeah, you suck dah da da. I'm like, well, Les, I know, I know the reason why I politely disagree. So I'm waiting with my friends and I'm like, I think I should say something, and they're not believing, but I'm gonna

say something. He walks over, just walk past us, and I like, you know, when you're walking past them, and he can see me in the proofery and I'm kind of like giving him the eyes and smiling and he stops. I'm like, hey, do I know you like pretending like I recognize him. He's like, oh no, like, oh, I just was looking at you. I feel like I really recognize you. He's like, oh nah, yeah, I was in your talk. He's like kai Im like, I'm x y Z from x y Z Industry person shook his hand.

Speaker 5

It's like, yeah, I saw your talk. I really liked it.

Speaker 4

So I'm thinking, what now, Like, is it in my head? Did I completely make that? And because before he came over, my friends were like, you probably made it up, like you'd just be really hyper aware and sensitive. Then we started talking and he was fully normal whoa, And so I did make it up, but in the process made myself feel better because I realized it wasn't in my head. Literally rewrote the narrative. Yes, met a new contact and

we had a really nice interaction. We were like talking about fashion and like really vibing, and then he walked away and I thought, I'm so glad I said something. I think if you see someone give you a greasy and it really emotionally affects you, and now you don't think there.

Speaker 2

Was a reason approach them. Well, Also, this just goes back to what we discussed, is it better to speak or die? So many scenarios where it seems like, the best option is to leave it, let it fester.

Speaker 3

You can deal with it on your own. No stray. So I forget that guy out. No, no, no, have a chat. Speak speak if you feel safe too.

Speaker 4

Yeah, I felt safe in that. You know, I'd done my talk. It went well.

Speaker 5

I was an industry event, and he.

Speaker 3

Was I'm so impressed with you. That's really awesome.

Speaker 5

Thanks. I was proud of myself too, he fleck and frooms.

Speaker 4

I read this story recently. I reckon it was like a week or two old. Honestly, I think it's right. It's been rinse, it's fresh in the media.

Speaker 3

I don't about it.

Speaker 4

Well, apparently there's this study that suggests that birth control might be curbing women's are.

Speaker 5

Desire to achieve in what way? This is what it says.

Speaker 4

In a world first University of Melbourne study of two hundred and seventy eight women found the participants who weren't taking any hormonal contraception experienced an increase in their motivation drive to achieve around the same time as ovulation. It was six times larger than the motivational increase that was expected by hormonal contraceptive users during the same time of month. And they said that their desire had flattened.

Speaker 5

Over the course of the month.

Speaker 4

So what it suggests is if you take the pill and it's changing your hormones, that might change how driven you are to do work and whatnot.

Speaker 3

Fascinating and the.

Speaker 5

Lead researcher says, it's crazy.

Speaker 4

It blows my mud, and it shows there's a psychological impact of the pill that.

Speaker 5

Is taken by over one hundred million people per day.

Speaker 3

One hundred million in Australia.

Speaker 5

I guess the pill. There's not a hundred way.

Speaker 3

You have never looked at me that way.

Speaker 4

Your life, My idea of you was shattered into that moment, shattered pieces. Yeah, Apparently one hundred million people take the pill and then it can severely blood.

Speaker 2

Apparently I don't take the pill, so I can't confirm or deny, But maybe my grind and hustle is directly attributed to the fact that I don't.

Speaker 3

Is that what the study is trying to say? I don't think so.

Speaker 4

Yeah, it seems very much in its infant stages this study. And I think it's a study that's gotten some press because supposedly younger people are not using contraception. Most of my friends. I don't know anyone on the pill. Oh Brooks on the pill. We've got one on the pill. You're the only adult woman I know that takes the pill. What are your feelings with that? I go on and off it occasionally, and that is just feel like a bit of a refresh.

Speaker 5

Is that how it works?

Speaker 3

Probably not, but I mean it's just what I do.

Speaker 4

Very interesting. Well, I haven't bone to pick up with these studies.

Speaker 5

I don't know.

Speaker 4

I'm not a researcher, so I can't really give my informed two cents, but I find the conversation around women's health and particularly things around menstruation really interesting and really touching because I think, on the one hand, that's interesting to know that that could be the reason, because I think we need to know more about why things like the pill have negative side effects because I haven't been that well researched in terms of longevity. But also I

don't want people to think. I don't want it to like perpetuate this myth that women's hormones change their drive and this, and that feels quite counteractive for what we're trying to do here.

Speaker 2

I agree, and perhaps if we do find this is the reason, well, then whose fault is it?

Speaker 3

Really?

Speaker 2

Because I don't I haven't had any personal experiences with going to the doctor and being proscribed the pill for acne or weight management.

Speaker 3

But I'm sure a lot of.

Speaker 2

People have, and so if they were over encouraged at a young age or at a certain point in their life to just jump on this lifelong medication, then there's someone else to blame for this.

Speaker 5

Literally, I was one of the ones that got it for the skin, made the skin worse. You just never know how it's gonna work for you. And I got hor model migraines, which really dampened the vibe.

Speaker 4

But that's the study. We'll see what happens next. Always good to be talking about these things.

Speaker 5

Getting curious.

Speaker 1

Absolutely you've been listening to the Flex and Frooms Daily podcast. For more, tune need Decater on DAB or stream it on iHeartRadio.

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