Flex and Frooms, Flex and Frooms. This is the Flex and Frooms catch up podcast.
It is Flex and Frooms on Cata. We got a fantastic DM. What was actually directly to my Instagram, not the Flex and Frooms page.
Really do either. Mickey's in the Flex and Rooms insta.
You know, I dip in and out of the dms, So depending where you want to go, will we will see it.
I got this DM.
I won't say their name, but they wrote, Hi, Frooms and flex pleasant, smiley face. I'm wondering how you guys maintain a lust for life. I've been going through a depression and feeling unable to snap out of it and really feel brain dead, fatigued, et cetera. Can you guys talk about any mental health experiences you've had and how you got through them. Thank you so much if you choose to read this message. You guys are so wonderful and funny and a huge pleasure to listen to.
Heartheart.
When I got this message, obviously I sent it directly to FLEXI and I wrote cute. She obviously got the memo about being polite because there was quite a few thank you. Yeah, it was a little bit of a compliment. There was some smiling. It's really great, and you know, I'm wondering. I love that kind of language rather than tell us how to tell us you're not depressed, yeah.
And wanting to eat for me, The number.
One tip that I'll have, just that's the surface level one, is that you always need something to look forward to. This is quite, yes, I guess antithetical to what depression feels like, but I feel like for some people when they're depressed, they don't look forward to anything, even if it's cool, things like you're numb, you're not feeling anything. However, for some types of depression, I think they can be somewhat rectified by having something to look forward to.
So in the school holidays, I used to get.
Really down, really sad, like low mood, melancholy vibes, and it was because I didn't have structure. I didn't have school to look forward to, I didn't have any like And I get it now because I'm freelance, like I can go a week without putting work off or you know, because you just work on your own hours and then
you think overthink things and you feel depressed. So for me it would be try to book in things that you are looking forward to, and then hope that in the interim your excitement gathers, because yes, sometimes you have to put yourself out there to create plans when you can't be bothered. But it's like the whole get out of the house, go for a walk, like that is actually the hardest step. So if you think about that as the hardest step, maybe that will help your brain.
Maybe the most obvious for me, like illustration of a depression or guess that was like obvious to me and other people is when I had an eating disorder. So when I had an eating disorder and I was trigger wanting anorexic, I didn't allow myself to feel anything. If I felt sad, I would never attribute that to the eating disorder.
I thought it was something else.
Now that I'm out of it, it was a few years ago I realized that it was a self fulfilling prophecy. So me being hungry all the time, me denying myself things, I was denying my feelings. I was denying that I was a human being. I kind of treated myself like I was a machine. And that meant that it was very hard to enjoy things that are enjoyable. I've been
doing quite a bit of research about it. So for example, this won't apply to everyone, of course, but for some people who say, have anorexia, your dopemine, serotonin, and cortisol levels can be out of whack. It's inconclusive whether or not this is like people are more predisposed to developing anerexcir because they already have an imbalance, or if they're not eating encourages it. But essentially like and this is how I feel now, I get dope maine from eating McDonald's.
I get dope mean from having a delicious meal with friends when I was the opposite of that. I will get dope mean from not eating, so me going hours that eating it actually makes.
You feel bad eating. It's not even because you feel bad because like this is gonna make me fat. You feel bad because you don't get rewhite.
Yeah, you get fully rewired to be the inverse like the colors go inverse, which I think is a good thing to learn. If you have anyone in your life who's struggling with an eating disorder and you're like, how are they not eating? Like eat, eat eat, you tell them to eat a sandwich like that's actually going against their chemical balance. So my first little tip is to figure out what your goal is. So when I was at my lowest, I got to the point where I was like, I.
Will trade anything.
I will trade my body that I felt I had perfected. I'll trade my work. I'll trade any goal that I had with work. I've always been quite sure of what I wanted, and I had real big dreams and goals and I felt like I was definitely on track to hit them. I thought, I'll give that away. I give my body, I'll give my work, I'll give everything away just to feel enjoyment, just to be able to enjoy these things that I enjoyed when I was a kid.
And the first little bits of that were really hard, but I would just keep that in the back of my head. I want to feel enjoyment. I want to feel enjoyment. And then it did come at the cost of that body. It came at the cost of certain work opportunities. I didn't feel as sharp as I was before because I was very sharp when I was anorexic, Like your brain can become very hyper focused on things,
which is helpful with work, I think. But I got what I wished for I enjoy things, and so the hardest step was, like I need to do this hardest thing, knowing that this is the only way forward because I can't go down this road.
So maybe if you're at.
The point with your depression where you kind of feel like you're at the end bit of your options, sit down with yourself and think, what do I actually what do I want if I could feel feelings again, what is the feeling that I want to feel?
And start from there. That's what I would do.
Start in a higher way, rather than beating yourself up about like knocketting out of bed or not doing this or that. Start with a desire that is both like ephemeral, something like enjoyment is quite ephemeral. It's not based on any achievement, and then explore it. I wish you, honestly, nothing but the best I wrote at the end of this, I love you and you can do it. Let's try together, love heart, Thank you.
I saw you like, why did we not end there? That's perfect? Thanks Queen. You've been listening to The Flex and Froom's daily podcast.
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