Hello, am my, Gremlins and Goblins. We are backed podcast edition for me taking selfies off herself. So whom's for? What? We do not know? Boy?
Not really my mum.
Either way, you don't need to share your business, It's.
Okay, but any opportunity I'm just waiting to get into a relationship so I can completely decimate it by sharing personal information.
Oh will you? Yeah? Oh fantastic.
You run out of material? Flex? You know, I mean the trenches. Always think, what do you.
Mean running out? You post ten stories a day. It's not even cracking the surface.
So let's get to it.
This is flex and frooms on Kada.
Would you believe me if I told you that there are some countries in the world that don't share the same calendar as us. No, I don't want to get into the simulation theory, and I won't. But I was scrolling through TikTok as I do no free press riptoc and I came across a video that I thought was fake news. Because what I trying to do these days to be more more discerning. I take most things as
fact when they come from a confidence speaker. This person said that Ethiopia has its own calendar, not Ethiopia, and like the rest of the African countries are in their own time zone. Ethiopia in itself as the country, has its own calendar. Really, while the rest of us no, no, no, hold on, hold on, it's not your time to speak. If you want to speak, what do you do? Put your hand up, thank you, missus flack. Ethiopia has a thirteen month calendar. Ethiopia is also in twenty fourteen. Really,
I swear down, I don't know how it works. I don't know why it works. But they're in twenty fourteen. So they've just come off the back of coney.
Yeah yeah, well this makes sense because Nat who's one of the other presenters on, he's from Ethiopia and doesn't even know like his age.
Yeah yeah, yeah yeah. This is the thing. And the other thing that's getting me right is, let's take it back to the Mayan calendar. Those of you who were born and raised by the Internet know that according to the Mayan calendar, the end of the world was twenty twelve, right, Some suggest that wasn't like the end of days, Like it's not like, you know, the bottom of the earth opened up and swallowed as whole, but the end of
things as they were right. It was twenty twelve in Ethiopia when COVID happened.
Oh, I'm a conspiracy theorists.
I don't want to do that.
We don't want to know that, but it's adding up.
Well, I'm I'm shook and I agree with you for once.
This is flex and frooms on kit.
I think I'm like the perfect general. Trivia person asked me to go too layers deeper. I really can't, but I've got a lot of surface information up top. Most recently, I discovered the best job in the world. I'm gonna give you a chance. What do you think it is.
I think it's somebody who is working on a cruise ship in the Bahamas.
No, not even close. Second. Guess it has something to do with funerals.
Oh dear, the person that does the makeup. Ooh, that can be kind of fun.
Yeah, that's quite good. But best job in the world probably not. Okay. I came across this guy who knows his name not important, but he is and his job is crucial. He calls himself a coffin confessor. What he does is he goes to the funerals of the deceased, and he reveals the secrets that they never shared when they were alived. So imagine I leave us earlier than expected. I hire this guy to come to the funeral and let you know a few things I wish I would have said, but didn't.
Do you have anything that you would say that you haven't.
We'll talk about later. For now, I want you to hear the information from his mouth.
Like crush funerals on behalf of the day deased. My first client was Graham. He was a gentleman that i'd been investigating a claim for. I got to know him only for a short while. He had cancer, he was close to death. We got to talking about death in the afterlife and all things surrounding death, and I suggested he do his own eulogy. He said he'd been to plenty of funerals where eulogies just aren't shown, and so I suggested I crash his funeral for him, and he
took me up on the offer. He wanted me to out his best mate for trying to sleep with his wife while he was on his deathbed. He also asked me to remove three people from the congregation that he hadn't seen in thirty years, So why were they paying their respects now when they could have seen him when he was alive. They stand up interrupt the funeral service and announced that his best mate's got to sit down, shut up, or over off because the man in the
coffin's got something to say. And this is what it is. And I'll open the envelope and I'll read.
Exactly what was first thing that I want to just draw to the forefront. Where's the patient confidentiality with this one? Should we know his name was Graham, that his best mate tried to sleep with his wife and to get three people from the wedding. If we just do some reverse engineering, some quick google Google, I could find it who Graham was.
Dracon Maybe I think that's a bit ambitious.
Aside from that, what do you think about this job? I think it is disgustingly fascinating.
No, I think it's terrible.
Really, yes?
What how like? Just imagine being a family and this random man rocks up to the funeral. You're grieving, You.
See, that's where you've got it mixed up. Not everybody grieves at a funeral. Sometimes funerals are celebrating, celebrating life.
Well, either way, he is rocking up and ruining that celebration or that commiseration. And I'm sorry to this poor man who has passed away, But grow some courage and say what you want to say on your deathbed.
Is this a bit no?
What I think it's just like, if you want to say it, you gotta get up the courage to say something. Why would he not he's dying anyway? What No, I'm going to stop you there. Here's the thing.
I don't think the point is for the person that's dying to feel vindicated or excited. I think it's for the people to feel responsible.
Right.
It's like in someone's death, there's no time for you to back chain and be like, wait, but this is what I meant, and I didn't mean to you, and I wasn't like chatting to your wife. No, you just got to copy it. This is what it's like to not have closure. People live without their whole lives. Think about the guy that's died. He's taken to his grave this information has felt lonely and distant from the people
that he loves most. It's only fair that they know that in a way that they can't do anything about it well.
I I want to know if he even attempted to tell them.
It's not the point. I think it's a great job, so you'd be happy. Not a great job. I think it's a great service. I don't know what the going rate is for that, Like is it per funeral, is it an ongoing thing? It could be anything though, Let's think of the plus side. For example, the coffin confessor could be somebody who is like an impartial body who's like, hey, this is what was really meant to happen. This is what you never found out. I signed an NDA, or
they sign an NDA. They couldn't tell you in their real life, this is what really went down.
So like they are a spy, there's.
They're a private investigator. They're just delivering the info. Yeah, I think he's a modern day superhero, a vigilante on a mission to spread truth, a truth seeker, a top bloke, a top bloke.
Yeah, I'm going to beg to differ and I'm going to kill this segment and move on.
You're listening to Flex and Frooms on Kada.
We're playing one of my favorite segments. This is am I the Asshole, where you call in you text in and you give us your scenario and we're gonna decide. Is it you that's the asshole or are you up against one of the largest assholes of all time?
Yeah?
The final boss, Today's am I the asshole? Comes courtesy of me? This is what it is.
This is your individual story.
Oh no, but like I'm bringing this so you found it?
Yeah?
Great.
My husband and I are having a disagreement about the appropriate level of our teenage daughter's modesty around the house.
Oh my gosh, Oh.
No, I don't like it allready.
Just don't be weird, period, Let's just stop there.
She is a beautiful girl and has a high level of confidence about her body, which is fantastic. I know there are many young women who do not have that.
Who's writing in the mum or the dad?
The mum great? But as part of that, since summer, she has become quite comfortable wearing very little around our home. I'm not sure why it rubs me the wrong way. She's often in her underthings, but it does. My husband thinks I'm being controlling and sending the wrong message about owning her body and positivity, etc. Thoughts are welcome.
This is not how I thought it was gonna go.
You thought it was gonna be the dad.
Yeah, sorry, dad.
What is our advice for her? I would say, I'm with the dad on this one. Body positivity. However, I think the buck stops when you go into the kitchen zone. I think you must wear pants in the kitchen, even if it's like a boy short brief. If you're wearing nothing on your legs, foul.
Who's wearing nothing? This little girl no underwear. This woman is wearing underwear but no pants. What's wrong with that?
I don't want your bare legs in the kitchen. What I don't know. Something about seeing undies in the kitchen like really rubs me the wrong way. That said i'll wear undies in the kitchen.
Oh, you just don't want to see it.
No, I don't want anyone else to.
This is not just limited to the daughter. It's like nobody can wear undies in the kitchen around you. No, that's fair, it's disgusting. I don't feel that strongly about it. I said initially that I thought this would be swapped. I thought the dad would be having an issue with it and the mum wouldn't be. I don't like the way this is going. I have read a lot of psychological articles where it's very like Sigmund Fredy, where they
say a lot of mothers not a lot. Some are in competition with their daughters because they see themselves reflected in their daughters. Don't want them to be seen as equals, and do they create these weird dynamics, apply a lot of pressure, and that's why a lot of mums and daughters have very thwarted relationships. It's about competition, not community in this instance, though, Mom, stop start cut it out. If your daughter can't be comfortable in her own home,
where can she be comfortable? You think that if you stifle her in that dynamic, she's going to be a free being out there. No, she's going to be as judgmental as you, as limited as you, and as awkward as you're making this. It shouldn't be a thing. It's one thing if you're saying, hey, babes, clothes are fun. If you want to wear them, fine if you don't. Also, it's making me feel a bit uncomfortable. It's not just
to see what's everyone. I don't want anyone being this naked in public areas because we're all adultsy I think it's inappropriate, but just singling her out in a way that even your husband is like, get a grip, babe, let it go.
I want to know that. Are they all like walking around in nunties in the house.
I don't think so. But also the fact that the dad is talking about, you know how the mom's not being inclusive or progressive. It's not about sexuality, it's about openness anyway. She's sexualizing her daughter, that's the problem, and then holding her daughter to standards that the daughter didn't set. It's tricky. On the flip side, though, I will say on the contrary, fearing your parents' house, you gonna follow your parents rules.
Babe, Really your parents house parents.
Yeah, that's why I moved out because I get it. I get it.
Really.
Yeah.
So what would you not be allowed to do in your home that you can do now?
Well, my mum, for instance, like getting as long as you're in my house, you can't get tattoos, and moved out and got twenty five.
It's chill, twenty five tattoos, I think twenty Well, you know what I did. What my dad said to me, if you ever get tattooed, I'm cutting your arm. Off fully serious. Yeah, oh, cut your arm off. So what I went and did is I got a tattoo. A tattoo artist came to my house and on the couch that he sits on to watch YouTube videos of cars every night, she drew an alien on my asshole, which I speak about frequently.
But you'd never show us. Not once have you shown the tattoo. It's come up thrice, not once, Just a little peek, spread cheek it.
Give us a look maybe later. So who is the asshole? Oh, who's the asshole?
The mum? I think mum and daughter are the asshole.
That said, though, the mum is the one reaching out saying am I in the wrong? So she's definitely open to a discussion. I think maybe she's maybe stuck. I'm guessing she grew up be in like the seventies or eighties where maybe like walking around in your undies in front of your parents like was not a vibe. So maybe she just needs to.
Be a bit Every parent and child grew up in different eras, so it requires a level of willingness and openness for both parties to be happy.
Here.
Daughter needs to understand where Mom's coming from. You're in her house. She's got to set a rules. She's uncomfortable. Mom needs to pick aside, have tacked and go in as a friend or be a parent, be like this is this is the rules, babe. You do it or you don't do it?
Half passing.
Yeah, oh well, if you want more advice from parents who aren't parents, I e. Flex and frooms, childless mummy bloggers. Yes, childless mommy bloggers. You know, stay tuned. The advice never stops. The unsolicited opinions never stop, flex and frooms. We're feeling like we want to get rich quick scheme.
Okay, is that how I'm feeling?
Yeah, I was feeling that for the both of ours. Last week we're talking about soliable rise to fame and now he's the greatest marketing genius of all time. We won't get into it now, but basically he's scammed people to listen to his songs. Won't tell you how because if you missed it, he snooze you lose bitter Like next something, what does the early bird do? The early bird gets the worm it does it does. Here's what other early birds do? They get jobs at fifteen, not
just any jobs. Listen to this I was researching different things that I can do to get that bag. And the way I did that is google the stories of celebrities that have come before me.
Okay, is that what you do?
Yeah? Every now and then, just to see if I'm missing out on anything. Here's the thing. I want to know, what length would you go to to get your dream job? Rosario Dawson, you're familiar Rosaria Dawson.
Is she there?
Did I say? Rosario?
Rosaria?
Rosaria?
Is she the one that's like with Eric Andre?
I'm not sure.
I think she is.
Love no fact checking, it doesn't matter anyway. So when she was fifteen, there was a commercial shooting outside of her apartment. She sat on her front porch every day that commercial was shooting, until a director and a screenwriter approached her and asked her if she wanted to be in a movie.
Hmmmm? Is that factual?
According to Dazed, the magazine, the publication we Know, the screenwriter Harmony Karen told her, I wrote this character for you without even realizing I didn't even know you. You're perfect for this character. You have to come in now. They tell you that you're not gonna get what you want if you just sit at home. People keep saying that to us. You gotta get outside if you want to go get it. We know you don't literally sit on your front porch and somebody will approach you. Kick back.
It's been done before. There's literal proof that it could happen. Stop going on the job websites, babes, see stop networking. All right, it's not working, is it? Just sit outside?
I gotta go.
If Razaria can do it, you can do it.
Flex and frooms.
The thing is, there is no place I would rather be than right here. And I know for a fact you feel the same. Yes, no comic, no act too much to be fair.
I agree. Life is so good?
Are you okay? While you're composing yourself, I want to tell you something that I know for a fact will shock you, maybe shock you into speaking, perhaps not at all. We'll see how we go. Do you remember a woman of the name Danny L. Brogoli aka bad Baby aka cash Me Outside Girl, as seen on Doctor Phil probably four years ago?
Absolutely iconic.
Yes, we all know. At one point she had red hair. I don't know what her vibe is. Recently, but April m I want to say nineteenth, but late April twenty twenty one, Danielle turned eighteen and on her eighteenth birthday. One might say it was a fantastic marketing opportunity. One might say it was an opportunity to increase her revenue stream. She launched an only fans and in hours, maybe about
six hours, made a million dollars. Now you might be thinking, okay, girl boss obsessed MM but opened the only fans on her eighteenth birthday, It means that predators were in the corners looking. We won't get into that though. What I will say is that a year later she posted or bragged about how much money she had made on OnlyFans. Since people said how much, she said tens of millions,
nobody believed her, so she posted the receipts. Dannielle Brogoli has made fifty two million dollars in a year on only fans. Fifty two million dollars. Do you want to know what's even crazier? What? I don't know if it's crazy or not crazy. But at the time, when she launched a year ago, she was copping a lot of
flak because she wasn't doing full nudity. She was doing like handbra you know, like hands across breast, pressed together, cleavage, you know, and then on the occasion she'd say, you know, if you if this post gets how many hundreds of thousands of likes, I'll do a nip slip. Who knows if she ever did it. People were saying that you can't really differentiate between her Instagram and her only fans. It's like the same, same, just pretty girl being pretty.
I don't know if she's dull, deeper, if she's doing fully noodles. Either way, Siss has made fifty two.
Million a year. I feel like we need to see perhaps, Yeah, I think it's.
That we need to try. And that's what I'm thinking. A million.
That's crazy. I can't even I guess America's so big, Yeah.
Okay, geography, what is the brain? America is huge? It is okay anyway, So what I got from that? And I know this is in the success ape. It's not a recipe for success. It's meant to be a quick fact that has drawn out. But I will say if there was any there was ever a motivation to get the branding up, that would be it. I'm trying to increase my market share just to start an only fans would you do it. Yeah, if we're not even doing nips, we're just doing cleavage.
Maybe we do a flex and ferms are only I would strongly consider that. Yeah, I've done much worse for cheaper.
You've been listening to The Flex and Frooms Daily podcast. For more, Tune in Decada on DAB or stream it on iHeartRadio.