We had a great time talking books with one of our favorite book YouTubers, Jess Owens! Jess tells us how she went from a high schooler who lost her love of reading to starting her own book YouTube channel. (She also tells us her favorite book world drama from the past year.) Topics include: Book CommuniTea, international lockdown, giant book collections, carrier pigeons, Nora Roberts, Elin Hilderbrand, Sarah Dessen, Roxane Gay, Angie Thomas, Jodi Picoult, Jenny Han, Jennifer Weiner, publishing m...
Jul 22, 2021•1 hr 3 min•Season 1Ep. 38
We read the final three chapters of John Kennedy Toole’s A Confederacy of Dunces! Hijinks ensue. It’s time to learn the fate of Ignatius J. Reilly (and every other named character). Jackie stays out of Nebraska - for free! Rachel puts on her criticism hat, against everyone else’s will. Theo secretly becomes an e-boy! Topics include: middle-aged Amelia Bedelia, explosions, Judy Garland worship, hyena lesbians, mustache, Back to the Future, Reddit bots, the Witch Incident, SpongeBob, War and Peace...
Jul 15, 2021•50 min•Season 1Ep. 37
We read chapters 7-11 of A Confederacy of Dunces, by John Kennedy Toole. The protagonist, Ignatius J. Reilly, gets a job as a hot dog vendor and continues ruining everyone’s lives. Theo knows all the characters’ names. Rachel revels in her non-consumption of meat. Jackie’s valve acts up. Topics include: hot dogs, dinosaurs, The Hunger Games, bad YA dystopias, Harry Potter, Divergent, three-party systems, The Young Pope, Saint Christopher Cynocephalus, dog boys, and college urban legends. Content...
Jul 08, 2021•52 min•Season 1Ep. 36
We’ve got a little treat for you all today: short, sweet, and to the point. The gang discusses the most famous patriotic American song written by a lesbian socialist. Jackie scams Wal-Mart. Theo premieres a new piece of music. Rachel premieres an old nickname. Topics include: Boston marriages, Pike’s Peak, pre-Christmas Scrooge, Ray Charles, Toby Keith, WAP, Coke commercials, Lin Manuel Miranda, Mozart, the SpaghettiOs mascot, and Pearl Harbor. Min Kwon's America the Beautiful Project: https://w...
Jul 04, 2021•23 min•Season 1Ep. 35
This week, we break down the first 6 chapters of a cult classic, that great work of New Orleansiana: John Kennedy Toole’s A Confederacy of Dunces. Get ready for some controversy, y’all! Ignatius J. Reilly is perhaps the worst person we’ve ever had as a main character. Theo flexes his degree. Jackie has a hilarious disco night pratfall at a skating rink. Rachel gets unfairly attacked by a lesbian. The gang contemplates adding an animal. Topics include: Thelma & Louise, NOLA, Dr. Nut, Mr. Pean...
Jul 01, 2021•1 hr 14 min•Season 1Ep. 34
We read Herman Melville’s bizarre short story Bartleby the Scrivener. Basically, this guy prefers not to do more and more things until he dies. Is it pro-capitalism or anti-capitalism? Is Bartleby a pathetic loser, or is he a hero? Find out what we think! Jackie sings the f***ing hobbits theme. Theo comes up with a nickname for himself. Rachel denies an unnamed company free clout. Topics include: Jerry Seinfeld, work drunk, the Miss Jackson award, the Hulk, Swilly Willy, Bob Cratchit energy, Smo...
Jun 24, 2021•1 hr 5 min•Season 1Ep. 33
Finally, the podcast name gets the appreciation it deserves! We discuss the car games we played with our dads (and one mum). Jackie’s Bob Dylan impression is back, and she gets corrected about LotR. Theo gets a little bit nervous, for good reason. Surprisingly, Jacob makes a dinosaur joke. Rachel dunks on supermen. Topics include: Alice & Sons, Kate Bush, Bible/science class, Tolkien, the Beatles, Fear & Loathing in Las Vegas, anoraks, trainspotting, alien disco, and Yngwie Malmsteen. Th...
Jun 20, 2021•1 hr 5 min•Season 1Ep. 32
We’ve come to the end of L. Frank Baum’s masterpiece(?), The Wonderful Wizard of Oz! Dorothy & co. finally reach the end of their journey. Will she make it back to Kansas at last? (Yes.) Jackie walks around and looks at stuff. Rachel puts an end to this charade. Theo uses friend power. Topics include: dropping the Baum, Alice in Wonderland, Ellie and Totoshka, Balaam and his donkey, St. Augustine, WWBWitSD?, nerfing, populous metropolises, spider-like creatures, Daredevil, brozards, the chil...
Jun 17, 2021•1 hr 13 min•Season 1Ep. 31
We read chapters 7 through 16 of L. Frank Baum’s The Wonderful Wizard of Oz. Dorothy and her comrades finally reach the Emerald City, and then things *really* take a turn! Theo gets ready for Halloween. Jackie calls shenanigans immediately. Rachel is just a very bad wizard. Topics include: ragged hay fingers, comradezoning, childhood nightmares, The Lion’s Cookbook, clams casino, septicles and octicles, Wolf Level, an attempted murder of crows, Rankin/Bass’ Frosty the Snowman, and liquid courage...
Jun 10, 2021•1 hr 22 min•Season 1Ep. 30
We read the first six chapters of L. Frank Baum’s The Wonderful Wizard of Oz! The book is somehow even stranger than the famously strange film. Come along with us and find out how that’s possible. Jackie faces the end of childhood and BSes her way into the right answer. Theo is put on the spot. Rachel gets gently doxxed. Jackie’s dog Grover makes a cameo. Topics include: wizcraft, zards, Pokemon, Sigmund Freud, Tin Cheney and Dick Man, cyclone science, Greg Fishel, the talk, the W.C., the ship o...
Jun 03, 2021•1 hr 11 min•Season 1Ep. 29
Wow! What an ending. Come on by and listen to us discuss the final act of Arthur Miller’s The Crucible. When Act 4 begins, John Proctor finds himself imprisoned in Salem as a witch. Let’s find out what happens to him together. Jackie confesses to an actual crime. Theo is walkin’ here. Rachel finally tells the tale of the time she was accused of witchcraft. Topics include: traffic stories, the devil, The Shining, Bruce Bogtrotter, bad drivers, passionate kisses, Halloween parties, Samhain, Kiki’s...
May 27, 2021•1 hr 3 min•Season 1Ep. 28
Just when we thought we were out, they (witches) pull us back in. Time for Act 3 of Arthur Miller’s play The Crucible - the famous courtroom scene. Such drama! Very suspense. Rachel gives off an aura of love. Theo is the self-proclaimed potion master. Jackie knows she’s gettin’ it in somewhere, and is very hard to impress. The gang learns that life’s too short to emphasize weird things. Topics include: bat drool, frog gloop, an impressive prom trick, Kung Pow: Enter the Fist, Theo’s catchphrase,...
May 20, 2021•1 hr 23 min•Season 1Ep. 27
Our best episode yet, or just our episode with the most Bests? We discuss Richard Connell’s 1924 short story, The Most Dangerous Game. Big game hunter Rainsford falls off a boat in the middle of the night and manages to swim to an island where he meets the mysterious General Zaroff, hunter of the most dangerous game. Jackie unveils her Mickey Mouse impression. Bekah spills all her hottest takes. Theo contemplates learning his lesson. Rachel tells the tale of the boat thief. Topics include: vagin...
May 13, 2021•1 hr 45 min•Season 1Ep. 26
We discuss Act 2 of The Crucible, by Arthur Miller. In both Salem and the pod, wild accusations fly left and right! The Proctors have a tense conversation. A weird poppet becomes significant. Abigail’s accusations start to lead to arrests. Rachel doesn’t give a *$#& and Theo can’t believe it. Jackie experiences a miraculous transformation. Topics include: 99 problems, Korean kiss cams, Chekhov’s whip, Veggie Tales, Theo’s macho past, the Ten Commandments, a witch deer, the secret menu, going...
May 06, 2021•1 hr 12 min•Season 1Ep. 25
We discuss Act 1 of The Crucible, by Arthur Miller! Abigail Williams, John Proctor, Giles Corey - the gang’s all here for this fictionalized version of the Salem witch trials. Jackie keeps insisting she’s a beautiful genius. Rachel transforms magical girl-style into Marge. Theo doesn’t like the optics on this. Topics include: Chekhov’s trip to Salem, Cueball Chandler, the hero’s journey, eyeballing vs. earholing, pearls before swine, schlubs, Daniel Day-Lewis facts, psychedelic corn smut, frog s...
Apr 29, 2021•1 hr 24 min•Season 1Ep. 24
We discuss chapters 1, 3, 5, and 16-18 of Story of the Stone (aka Dream of the Red Chamber) by Cao Xueqin, perhaps THE canonical Chinese novel. All sorts of bizarre and amazing things happen! A stone becomes a boy, a flower becomes a girl, and characters we think will be important totally disappear. We have a very special guest with us this week: Jeannette Ng, author of Under the Pendulum Sun, a book Rachel recommends you read. Jackie re-tells a joke! The truth comes to light, in terms of who ca...
Apr 22, 2021•1 hr 33 min•Season 1Ep. 23
This week, your hosts read and discuss 6 classic springtime poems! Poems from Shakespeare, Wordsworth, Gerard Manley Hopkins, e e cummings, Edna St. Vincent Millay, and Dickinson, - ever heard of them? Jackie was just born. Theo gets real hung up on mucus. Rachel knows how many legs various insects have. Topics include: puddles of goo, bears, caterpillars, butterflies, bees, rabbits, retractable claws, Benjamin Franklin, springtime goths, the Pokemon theme song, Cheerios, and the Old Ones. Jacki...
Apr 15, 2021•57 min•Season 1Ep. 22
We finish discussing Parable of the Sower, by Octavia Butler. Spoiler: this half is much more uplifting. Your hosts and producer are trapped in separate, unique dystopias! What an interesting occurrence that you can’t find on just any podcast. Jackie doesn’t jump in. Theo “enjoys” a conversation pit. Rachel gets bothered. Topics include: Bannerless by Carrie Vaughn, Bird Box, Lord of the Rings by J.R.R. Tolkien, The Guardians of Ga’Hoole, PUBG, Little Papa Christopher, John Lennon’s return. Cont...
Apr 08, 2021•1 hr 22 min•Season 1Ep. 21
A teaser for our upcoming miniseries on the works of Lutwidge Igckens. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★
Apr 01, 2021•6 min•Season 1Ep. 1000
We discuss the first half of Parable of the Sower, by Octavia Butler. This week, we’re excited to talk about a topical, timely book, for perhaps the first time! For some reason, people have been very interested in reading a well-written, feminist, post-apocalyptic sci-fi book that takes place in the near future… Rachel shares the Good News. Theo saves himself for Pyro. Jackie finally makes her dad proud. Topics include: the Spoil Zone, the Biblical Bible, our old pal Sextus, youthful plagiarism,...
Apr 01, 2021•1 hr 29 min•Season 1Ep. 20
It’s good to be back, everyone! This week, we have a very special episode for you all - author and podcaster Lindsey Kelk joins us to discuss Pride & Prejudice, but we end up talking about everything else, too. Topics include: bluffing your way through college, rom-coms, the publishing industry, Bridget Jones, Succession, Hemingway’s Gun, bed-sharing, fan fiction, Shakespeare, professional wrestling, lipstick, John Oliver, and talking dogs. Check out Lindsey’s latest adult book, In Case You ...
Mar 25, 2021•1 hr 35 min•Season 1Ep. 19
Enjoy a new Beowulf-themed song by the Fire the Canon House Band! LYRICS: I come in the night and deliver the pain Mankind’s-enemy descended from Cain The twilight spoiler, and Grendel’s my name They set up camp and planned to stay Oh there was a man-price they’d have to pay: But then I met a man who changed my ways I had come In the night For a bite Oh you might Call that naughty Then I saw In the hall 30 men In one small Human body Oh Wolf-Bee Bring me some of that sweet honey Come and give me...
Mar 18, 2021•3 min•Season 1Ep. 1000
We finish our discussion of Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen. Will Elizabeth and Darcy get together? Will Jane and Bingley get together? What’s going on with Lydia? Theo has some opinions! Jackie reveals her ulterior motive. Rachel reveals what a woman wants to hear. The gang suggests some modest improvements. Stephen passes judgment on a character. We regret to inform you of a disturbing academic study. Wow! What a ride, right, everyone? Topics include: duels, Kitty’s universal acclaim, Set...
Mar 11, 2021•1 hr 18 min•Season 1Ep. 18
We discuss chapters 35-46 of Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen. Things are heating up for Darcy and Elizabeth! Can these two crazy kids ever make it work? It’s a huge mystery. Theo crosses some people off his list, and experiences a failure of empathy. Nestor the Horse Lord returns. Rachel tells an extremely awkward tale from her past - perhaps she’s the Mr. Darcy of the group after all. Jackie tells an underrated joke. Topics include: the Da Vinci Code, proposing willy-nilly, directions from...
Mar 04, 2021•52 min•Season 1Ep. 17
We discuss chapters 22 through 34 of Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen. Rachel makes her first correction ever. Theo finally learns the main character’s name, and immediately decides he dislikes her. Jackie makes everyone happy. The gang has a big disagreement that they need YOU, listener, to solve. The Mysterious Murder of Count Marigold comes to its shocking conclusion! Theo fancasts his own version of Pride & Prejudice. Topics include: John Oliver’s triumphant return, Jar Jar Binks, Bi...
Feb 25, 2021•1 hr 5 min•Season 1Ep. 16
Pride & Prejudice 2: Shrubberies & Snubberies We discuss chapters 9-ish through 21 of Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen. Mr. Darcy makes some spicy remarks - we’d love to get him on the pod. A wild proposal appears! For this book, the gang’s opinions are Rachel’s. Fans of Jackie’s British accent(s) will have a great time this episode! Theo makes a fool of himself re: shrubbery. He also compares himself to Mr. Darcy but it’s somehow not a brag. Topics include: liberries, Ol’ One Ball B...
Feb 18, 2021•54 min•Season 1Ep. 15
Love is in the air this Valentine’s Day! And it’s also in the chambers of the sea. Jackie tells the tale of T. S. Eliot. The gang fully commits to a stupid bit. We all learn what the J stands for. Theo gives the correct interpretation. Which is your favorite Ninja Turtle? Topics include: Libra energy, Jalfred the Jbutler, Sir Tom Hiddleston, Yu-Gi-Oh vs. Pokemon again, Theo’s weirdhouse, and Halloween costume ideas. ★ Support this podcast on Patreon ★...
Feb 14, 2021•35 min•Season 1Ep. 14
We discuss up to chapter 9-ish of Pride & Prejudice, by Jane Austen. Rachel and Jackie immediately have an argument, into which Theo tentatively dips a toe. One of Theo’s nicknames is revealed! Jackie rejoices in someone’s untimely demise yet again. Jackie and Theo consider Rachel a Babel fish, and Theo seriously disses Lydia Bennet. Elizabeth Bennet and Fitzwilliam Darcy are also prominently featured. Topics include: John Oliver, the Mario thing, Three Chill Bros, 3-0’s return, a small-town...
Feb 11, 2021•52 min•Season 1Ep. 13
We finish discussing The Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger. Jackie arrives at the end of her rope, listening-wise. Theo tells everyone how to pull a college entrance scam. Rachel does a reading from the work of an emerging writer. The gang displays their New York City knowledge. Topics include: whistling bores, the Bra Patch, Red Lahbstah, Santadict Clausald, the Young Clarinetists Club, Beta Upsilon Nu Nu, and the solution to everything. Content warning: discussion of bullying, suicide, self...
Feb 04, 2021•55 min•Season 1Ep. 12
We discuss The Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. “Ol’ One Ball” Salinger. This is our second attempt at recording this episode, because the first try was depressing! Now it’s depressing AND funny, we promise. The gang intersperses Holden Caulfield’s tale with thrilling tales of their own teenage lives. Theo makes a New York joke about on par with his better Yu-Gi-Oh! joke, and Three-o is finally introduced. Topics include: the people’s producer, hot Salinger goss, easy, breezy, beautiful Darcy, Accide...
Jan 28, 2021•53 min•Season 1Ep. 11
