Welcome to the nourishing. Amy podcast. I'm Amy Rankin. I am an emotional intelligence and life coach as Speaker, a Creator, and a wellness. Chaser, I have created this podcast for you to learn how 'but mindset changes and get really actionable. Takeaways to find out who you are, what lights you up, how you can love yourself again and how to live your best life. Give yourself the space to welcome in more self-care and Parents reduce feelings like overwhelm and stress and let
find your sparkle again. Are you ready? Let's do it. Hello and welcome to episode 108 of the nourishing. Amy podcast, as promised today's episode is going to be all about self-sabotage and procrastination. I'm going to be teaching you about the two different areas of the brain that get engaged when we lean into procrastinating patterns. I guess you would say and I hope that this helps you to understand more About what's actually going on in your brain.
When you do start to notice that you're buying into excuses, or the procrastination is coming up for you. But even cooler is what I've noticed with a few of my clients since I ran this Workshop over with bu happiness college, is that they've actively been able to notice this, and they can actually like kind of watch it playing out in their brain and they're like, well this is exactly what Amy was talking about in that Workshop the other day.
So like, I just mentioned, This is a workshop that I ran for bu happiness college and with our beautiful clients over there. So for those of you that don't know, which I'm sure most of you do, I am currently working with bu happiness college with my one-on-one clients and also for our group Workshop session. So I run a workshop on a specific topic every month as
well. So once a month, I choose a topic that I'm either really interested in or that I noticed that my clients would really like to be King on and I get their suggestions and questions and things like that and put them all together. So there's another one that I ran last month which I'm also going to run you guys through to because I just think the content in it and yeah, just everything. It was such a good Workshop. It was on self-worth and negative self-talk and things like that.
So definitely going to be doing that for you guys in the next few episodes as well. But this is a Pretty highly requested topic. And to be honest, procrastination, is something that happens to all of us. Like, I notice it coming up for me.
I know that when I talk to a lot of my clients and we have our sessions procrastination and buying into our own excuses is definitely something that we feel gets in our own way of really taking action on the things that we really want to be doing and gets in the way, then, of course, of helping us to lean towards how we want to be feeling as well. So before I jump, Into all of that, I am going to give you my
recommendations now. I have two this week because one is a bit of a, light-hearted silly recommendation. The other one is an actual proper recommendation. So this silly one and the light-hearted one is, if you haven't had a chance to check it out, Byron Bay's on Netflix, if you're looking for a TV show, to literally just switch your brain off and not take seriously at all. This is your show, it's a reality show.
And when I say reality, I'm really putting that in like quotations because to be fair, like the whole thing is so scripted but it's just so light-hearted. It's something that I have had on in the background.
If I've just been like, cooking dinner or if I've had a really emotionally overwhelming day with Ali and he's gone down for bed, I might just pop an episode on just to kind of wind down and help to switch my brain off before I jump into like you know, cooking dinner cleaning the Soul of the things that happen. So it's yeah, look, there's so
many. Like, if you Google Byron Bay's, it will come up. You like you can find out what it's about there but it's a show that follows around this group of influences that live in Byron or that have moved to Byron Bay for a, you know, certain reason, whatever it is in their career and kind of follows them around. So it's very silly, it's very scripted. But Shameless podcast actually did a really interesting feature on it.
I think maybe two weeks ago now, maybe it was last week on the Thursday episode, but they were saying that it was really interesting. I don't know that we and when I say we I mean like, I guess women in my demographic but also Australians in general, I don't know that we are the target market for it. So there were giving a Really interesting statistics over on Shameless and they were saying that there was also a reality show called yummy mummies that I
think was originally released. They were saying back in 2017 and it didn't do very well in Australia and it didn't get picked up for a second season or anything like that. We were really weren't too interested in it here. But once it hit Netflix and was featuring in America, it went absolutely crazy and it was like, Like two years later. So I think it was then 2019 or something. They were saying that it was released over in America and all of the stars or whatever you would call them.
I guess they're not really contestants. Yeah, we'll say stars all of the stars of the show of yummy mummies their social media and Instagrams and things just went crazy like overnight because it was such a hit.
So they were kind of talking over on Shameless and saying that maybe it's a similar kind of concept here, where a as Australians where maybe not necessarily the proper target market that they were really aiming for, and that maybe it is another show that could potentially be quite popular overseas, which I kind of tend to agree with, I guess, because if you take away the in my personal opinion, terrible acting and the scripting, the very obvious scripting and you
just take the show for what it is and you take on board like the landscape and the I guess just like that particular part of the world and the beautiful beaches that they show and things like that, I guess it would be quite interesting. It's just that maybe because we live here. We're used to beautiful beaches and, you know, all of that kind of stuff. Anyway, not going to talk about Byron Bay's anymore. So, that's my silly recommendation. But my actual proper
recommendation for you guys. This week is also if you jump over onto my blog, So it's literally just a Amy Rankin.com and I have put up a post with all of the recipes at the moment that Ali is really, really loving. So I have gotten quite a few questions through. Like when I put up a question box over on my Instagram story and people will comment and say can you please share more of what Ali eats? So that I can get some ideas.
Which, of course I have definitely been trying to do but I thought why not put The recipes all in one spot for you guys. And I've put the recipe link. So there's like maybe two or three that I've just popped to the recipe in for you because it's something that I've maybe just like Madoff the car for, that's very easy, but if it's actually a specific recipe from a website that's like one of my go twos and I'm always using that recipe.
I literally just put the link in there for you and there's some really great options in there. I'd find at the moment, Ali is definitely snacking. More rather than actually like having full proper meals. So breakfast is probably his only full proper really big meal of the day at the moment and he will have like, he literally it's more than me at the moment, but apart from that then during the day, so he has his afternoon nap at about 12:30 p.m. 1 p.m. So he'll have his breakfast in
the morning. When he wakes up, I try and get him to eat some lunch but it's more of a snack. Of whatever I've made. And then also, for dinner. He used to really enjoy sitting down and having a big dinner as well, something like spaghetti, but he hasn't really been super
into that the last few weeks. So I've had to be a little bit creative and definitely had to work on reducing my expectations for the amount of foods that he is eating and just really working with what we can, which has been a very big learning curve for me. Something that I Talk a lot about is feeling frustrated and whether that frustration is with someone or something in your life, be it at work, be it a partner, be it, friends family members children, or that kind
of stuff. Generally, we feel frustrated or disappointed, if we have set an expectation that's not being met. So I really had to call myself out and be super super aware of expectations that I've been setting over Ali and his eating, you guys would probably have seen as well if you follow me over on Instagram. Graham and again this is also why this podcast episode is like three weeks late in dropping, we just had such a bad run over the last three to four weeks, all he got.
He picked up a cold and had a bit of the flu that he then passed around to the rest of the household. Of course about three or four weeks ago. And then two weeks ago, we went to a play center and he picked up gastro unfortunately, which look like, you know, it's it's going around. It's absolutely insane when I shared that we had gastro going through our house. I had so many people responding. I actually ended up having to take Ali to the doctors because he was still having symptoms
after about a week. And I was getting a bit worried about him so and the doctor actually said as well, there's been a huge outbreak of gastro around our general area on the Central Coast as well. So yeah, it's just look like the last four weeks and then top that with just like, you know, Being pregnant trying to fit all my work in. Keep the house clean and tidy, it's just been a lot, you guys.
And I honestly just haven't felt that I could really show up in the podcasting space and give you guys the energy that I think you really deserve in podcast episodes as well. So, here I am from for about four weeks late with this podcast episode. But we're here. And like I said, in Monday's episode, I did a little Monday motivation for you guys on overwhelm.
I actually Have like probably six different podcast topics ready to go, that I want to record on and I also put a little question box up on my Instagram last week and I also asked over in the glow up Facebook page that we have Facebook group. I also asked a little question in there about what podcast topics you guys would like me to be talking about and I got some really great options there as
well. So we've got so many amazing and very interesting, cool topics coming up over the next you know, six. To eight weeks. Thanks a largely to you guys as well for your ideas and your suggestions and your questions which I always love. So please feel free. If you ever are feeling like I really want to know more about these for. I'm wondering about this, I'm noticing this coming up in my life definitely come and just send me an inbox, let me know.
And I can definitely be recording some episodes for you. But yeah. So that blog post on all his favorite foods and snacks are he's currently 15 months old. But to be honest like some of these meals that Included in their, their actual meals that like iron and I have made for ourselves and then tried it with Ali and he's ended up really enjoying it. So it's broken up into breakfast, so things like French toast, loaded oats loaded, wheat, big stuff like that and then also snacks and meals.
So, smoothies the zucchini and corn fritters, if you've seen them over on my Instagram, the last few weeks you may have seen them this morning and Ali throwing them on the floor. But they were hit last week so the recipe for them is there. Yeah, there's some chicken potato, and broccoli fingers, there is tuna spinach and rice. Cheesy patties, there is spinach corn, and passed, a muffin zucchini slice, a banana and
spinach pancakes, or pikelets. If you like to make them for a snack, the banana date, and Cheon muffins that I make all the time. Like, I would say, I make them at least once a fortnight, they're so delicious. But yeah, they're one of our absolute faves and That recipes there. I also popped up a recipe for the thermomix. Chicken, spinach bacon and pumpkin risotto that I made last week. I got quite a few questions on that as well over on Instagram.
So that recipe is there. And also, there is a super, super easy meatball pasta bake as well, which has also been a massive hit. So all of those recipes are over there for you, literally just go to any rank and.com, okay? Now let's actually start talking About procrastination. So the quote. So those of you that our clients with bu happiness college would know that we always start our workshops with a quote that we have found.
That is relevant to the topic. And I am so obsessed with this quote and I think it really paints a fantastic picture of what self-sabotage and procrastination actually is. So self-sabotage is knowing exactly what you need to do to improve but not doing it. It's procrastinating doing the very things that, you know, will make you happier. It's waiting until things are 100% perfect, until you do them. It's remaining in the comfort zone because of fear of failure
or the uneasiness of change. Are you a prisoner of your own thoughts? It's time to take responsibility acknowledge. You have, put yourself in this mindset but also that you have the power to Free Yourself. I just found that quote, so powerful. I love it so much, and I thought, when I think about self sabotage, a procrastination, personally for myself, it really resonated. Now, if you guys aren't familiar, like I said, we run these workshops.
So I do a workshop once a month and then there's also Declan and just and Elizabeth who also run workshops. So essentially we have a workshop every single week and so our workshops are Runners group workshops. So any of our members can Online live.
If they're available live that night and they can jump on and they can run through the workbook that we've created and the content with us together as coaches or they're all saved and available is replays in your member resource Library as a client with us over at bu happiness College to.
So if learning about this stuff, is your jam and if you're like, I would love to be able to have access to a new mindset topic every single week and have a workbook to run through and different tools and methods and things like that. That We're teaching you guys so that you can be learning more about yourself. Definitely send me a message and let me know because I can help you to understand what the what?
Sorry I'm getting my words mixed up what our program, entails all that kind of stuff and whether you feel like it would be the right fit for you. So let's actually have a look at the difference between self-sabotage and procrastination here to start off with. So I always start off with creating awareness in my workshops about like, what is this?
So that we can start to create Awareness for yourself because as you always know as I always say, sorry and you would know that we can't change something if we're not aware of it. So, self-sabotage is, when you undermine your own goals and values. It's acknowledging that there is something that you genuinely want, and believe is good for you, but then you do things that directly conflict with that goal. So self-sabotage can be conscious, but it can also be unconscious as well.
So conscious examples of self. Sabotage would be things like knowing that you need to cook dinner but scrolling on your phone instead or knowing that you really want to clean the house but watching an episode of maps and sitting on the lounge, stuff like that. That's all very conscious forms of self-sabotage, unconscious forms of self-sabotage, can be things like, withdrawing from a relationship when problems are arising because of fear of previous relationship patterns.
So they're definitely more, I guess like trauma-based. If we would like to use the word trauma, Unconscious self sabotage that it's a pattern of behavior or thinking that you may not even notice comes up for you or is happening for you, essentially, because you are trying to protect yourself from something that has happened before.
So this is where when we start to notice a lot of these unconscious Behavior happening where it can be really useful to work with a coach because we can help you to call this out to recognize this but also to move through it and work through that past trauma or These patterns and behaviors that you have created to keep yourself safe, and create that safeness, is that even a word safety for yourself. Now, let's have a look at the difference between them and
procrastination. So procrastination is the action of unnecessarily and voluntarily delaying, or postponing something, despite knowing that there will be negative consequences for doing so. So if we have a look at some examples of where you might notice self-sabotage, your procrastination, Coming up for you. There's so so many different examples and I really do want you to think about what resonates with you here. Or as I'm going through these examples. What about you like in your life?
Specifically, where do you notice it? So, we could notice it with things like studying, it could be things like taking action on achieving your goal that you've set for yourself. You could be procrastinating on leaving a relationship and staying comfortable in that comfortability of that relationship. Even though, you know, deep down it's probably Not the relationship that you would like to be in that. You can Envision yourself in for the rest of your life.
It could be something like moving house. Maybe leaving a job that you don't like. Potentially we could look at wanting to change habits, like drinking less eating healthier having less screen time. This is where a lot of that, self-sabotage Behavior can come in where it's like, I know that I want to change these things, but it feels hard, right? Or it's my comfort zone.
We could also look at procrastination on those daily mundane tasks or Things as well as those daily rituals or habits and things like that that you have for yourself. So it could be your morning routine. It could be a certain aspect of your morning or evening routine that you notice is not really vibing for you. That is then also resulting in procrastination or self-sabotage
as well. So with all that being said, I do just invite you to just take a second and think where do I notice like if I was to think about, where have I been procrastinating? Lately. What areas of life? Do I notice coming up for me that's resonating here. What do you notice?
Where is that self sabotage or that procrastination coming up for you, what things are you putting off either subconsciously or maybe unconsciously, sorry consciously or unconsciously subconscious and unconscious of the same word, Amy? Okay. So now that you've been able to create a little bit of awareness, I want to teach you about the different areas of the brain that affect self-sabotage and procrastination. Like I said for me when I learned this, this was my Really
big. Aha moment where I was like, whoa, I really wish I knew this like 15 years ago because it would have really helped a lot. So we have our limbic system and we also have our prefrontal cortex. So these are the two main areas that are affected when we're really looking at self-sabotage and procrastination. These are the two areas of the brain that are really firing. So with our limbic system, this is our reptilian Brain. This is our emotional fight or flight, survival responses.
It's our limbic system is our Behavior like getting food looking for danger reproduction caring for yourself. Keeping yourself safe may be caring for children, looking out for your friends, that kind of stuff. This is our limbic system. It's it's a lot of the behaviors that we're doing super regularly on autopilot without even realizing that we're doing it even things like breathing, you know when you're hungry you go and make So food.
This is our limbic system. Keeping you safe and doing the things that you need to do to keep yourself Alive. Now, what we also have is the prefrontal cortex. Now, this is your logical thinking it is, you're planning. It is your understanding of consequences and emotions. It's your ability to be calming yourself down your prefrontal. Cortex is your critical thinking. It's your debating. Its considering things without getting sued. Super emotional. So this is our prefrontal cortex.
So it's our logical. Thinking things like I need to do this, I should be getting this done. It's the reasoning that comes in of like, yep, I'm going to do this today. These are all the things on my to-do list. I need to get this, this, this, and this done, that's our logical thinking, it's our prefrontal cortex when we think about that emotional side or the limbic system, it's the things that then come in, like our, but I don't feel like doing that. I don't really want to do that.
You can see the difference in the thinking patterns that we can start to notice there. Now, I'm going to give you a really, really simple. Real life example that I can. Pretty much guarantee has happened to you before because every single person that was online live for this Workshop was laughing and resonating with this. But also, when you can see how this can happen in such a simple task, you will hopefully also be able to start to notice it coming up in other areas for you as well.
So, my example, Sample that I have for you is getting out of the shower. So, let's just say, for example, it's been a long day, or maybe it's the middle of winter and you're really looking forward to a nice warm shower. Now, your logical brain, you've been in the shower for say, five or ten minutes, go logical brain is thinking. All right, let's get out of the shower.
I've got other things to do. So you're also going through your list of, like, I want to get out of the shower, if it's the evening, it's like I want to read my book. I'm going to go and make myself my cup of tea. I want to do my skin. Care. It's your logical brain. Like I've got stuff to do. Come on, let's go now. If you wait too long, your emotional or limbic system and side of your brain kicks in and starts to think maybe things like hang on a second.
This is really nice. I want to stay here in the shower, it's warm, its relaxing. Like, I like it in here. I don't really want to get out. I know that prefrontal cortex and logical thinking you're telling me. That I've got these other things to do and I know it makes sense for me to get out, but I don't want to. So this is the big difference here. So some other examples that you might notice this coming up in the simple that kind of day-to-day things is getting out
of bed. Maybe putting your shoes on and going to the gym or going for a run. You could be looking at things like cleaning the house studying doing an assessment planning for a meeting that you have at work or a presentation. That you have coming up those types of things. So we noticed that our logical brain is like, okay, cool. Time to sit down and do my study or time to sit down and get this Presentation done, full.
Oh my gosh, my words today, you guys definitely not helpful to forget words when you're trying to record a podcast episode. So we notice these things coming up, where the logical brain is like, okay. Other stuff to do things on my to-do list, it makes sense for me to stop doing this thing now or to like kick my butt into gear and get out of bed or put my shoes on. I'll put the YouTube video on to do my workout or I'm hungry. Let's make lunch.
Those types of things. We notice, then that the emotional side or that limbic system kicks in, and that's when our excuses can start to come up. So, I want you to again, take a second and just think about where do I notice this coming up for me? Like, where do I notice the procrastination kicking in? Maybe it's getting out of the shower, maybe it's getting out of bed and not scrolling on your phone in the morning.
Maybe it is, tied in your house, cleaning house cooking dinners of an evening doing your meal planning and Prepping on the weekends, whatever it is for you. Where is your procrastination coming up? Where are you buying into your own excuses? So again, the excuses in this example is things like but it's nice in here, like I want to stay in the shower. It's nice and warm. I feel relaxed Where are your excuses coming up and what do they look like?
When you notice there's a certain area that you're procrastinating in, maybe if you're scrolling on your phone, it's like all. But like I'm just, I'm just going to be on my phone for 5 minutes. I'm just taking a time to switch my brain off and relax, or I'm just getting a little bit of work done. I'm just responding to emails those types of things guys, they're still excuses. So there's a lot of different reasons why self-sabotage and procrastination can happen.
I'm going to run you through a few of What they might be so that you can again start to create another level of awareness for you instead of just being like, okay cool. This is something that I do. So there's a few different ones like I said, there's actually so many I've just kind of narrowed it down to what I would personally say is the top six and I will run you through what they are. So one of the reasons that I have is that you have too many
options sometimes. When you give yourself too many options, it can feel really overwhelming and when you feel overwhelmed sometimes that can also lead to shutting down and just not making a decision at all or going for one of your destruction techniques, like scrolling on your phone like listening to a podcast like basically doing anything apart from the things that are making you feel overwhelmed.
So we want to look at how can I reduce some of my options and I'm going to talk to you about that in about 5 minutes. Another reason that self to self-sabotage, sorry and procrastination can happen is perfectionism. So this is a thinking pattern that you can get stuck in or
cognitive distortion. If you're familiar with my mindset series that I did a few months ago, perfectionism and setting really high standards on yourself and having that high achiever driver can be a really good thing, but it can also be
quite limiting as well. So, if you notice that you've got a high achiever driver, if you notice that you can be a bit of a perfectionist, if you're really good at beating, Self up, if you're really good at pointing out what you've done wrong, instead of focusing on what you're doing really well, or what you feel like you've done, right? There's a good chance that you lean towards having a bit of a
perfectionism driver here. So we want to work with our strengths and also notice the limitations, so our strengths of our perfectionism or high achiever driver can be that. Yeah, maybe you are able to get a lot of things done, or maybe you really like to put out a high quality of work now,
They're not bad things. But when we look at the limitations of that perfectionism or high achiever driver, what we can also see is that it can be linked to negative, self-talk it can be linked to procrastination, it can be linked to self-sabotage, really buying into your own excuses, putting your own road-book blocks into place. I would say with that perfectionism driver that can come up there because you're continuously believing and
leaning into that. Feeling that will this is Good enough, it's not what I expected. It's not what I was hoping for. So again, it can look like having really high expectations on yourself and so just getting clear on what are the expectations that I've set for this certain thing that I'm doing and how am I not meeting them? And one of the things, the quote has escaped me but I'll come back to it, it's maybe something like done is better than look, I'll come back to it if I can
remember. I feel like my baby Rains really kicked in today, okay? So my next reason that I have for you is Black or White thinking or that can also be called All or Nothing thinking. So with procrastination and self-sabotage, let's say for example you have said that okay for three mornings this week three or four mornings this week I am going to do my work out first thing in the morning as soon as I get up and so that's your goal that you've set for
yourself and your action steps. Something happens, Monday morning you get up and you're like yep, I'm up. I'm out of bed. I've done my work out. Amazing. Love that for you choose day comes around. Something, throws you off, maybe you had a really bad night sleep. Maybe you slip through your alarm. Maybe you press snooze three times.
And then you feel like you're rushing around, trying to get ready for work or get the kids ready to get out the door, those types of things black or white thinking or all-or-nothing. Thinking can kick in here and have you feeling like oh well I've ruined it for They then there's no point. Like, I've got no other time now, I was supposed to be doing my workout in the morning, so that's it. The reality is, yes, it might be ideal for you to be doing your
workout in the morning. That doesn't mean that there is no time and that you cannot prioritize that, if that is a goal that you have also realizing that. Okay, well, ideally you would have liked to do it on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, but your goal was actually to be working out or moving your body. Times a week four times for this week, there's seven days in this week. So, just because you've missed one of the days that you originally had allocated in your mind.
Doesn't mean that you've ruined the whole week, you still got the rest of the week to be organizing that and to be moving through your self sabotage on your procrastination. So really getting clear on, where do you notice that
all-or-nothing? Thinking this is one that I've got a lot of feedback from I was talking about black or white thinking over on my Instagram stories a few weeks ago and I had quite a few messages coming back from people saying, oh my gosh, like I definitely noticed that coming up for me as well. It could even be something like our normally I do my meal planning on Sundays and I haven't done that and now it's Tuesday and you know, we're nearly halfway through the week.
What's the point? Well, the point is that you still have Tuesday night, you still have all day Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, left in the week. Are you really not going to be doing any meal planning or a? The grocery shop for the rest of those five days and just hoping to be able to throw things together. Because what happens when you do just hope to throw things together, you're in that fight or flight mode.
You're not feeling organized, you're not feeling like you've got yourself sorted, it's another thing that you are then thinking about as well. And this goes for so many other things not just meal planning and meal prepping and grocery shopping. But so many Any other things. So when we get stuck in that all-or-nothing thinking pattern, I want you to just call it out. See it for what it is and just question. Well, is this really true?
Like am I buying into? Excuse me, buying into my All or Nothing or my black or white thinking pattern here and what can I do to be moving through? That is this 100% true for me. Now, one of the other reasons that self-sabotage and procrastination can happen is maybe you might be scared to lose what you have. So this is a big one. When we look at procrastination around creating change.
So like I mentioned very earlier in the episode, we could be looking at things like leaving a relationship, getting a new job, moving house, things like that, it's the big decisions in life. It's the change in life and that can feel scary. It can feel hard. We like to be in our comfort zone because it feels safe and we like safety, safety. Essentially, in our brain, safety Keeps Us Alive.
And so there's a reason why change can make so many of us feel quite uncomfortable, but it's also recognizing that I mean, changes happening all around you every single day. You're not the same person. You are last week, you're not the same person. You are two weeks. You were two weeks ago a month ago, six months ago, four years ago, you are ever evolving as much as you don't like to admit it. And as much as you would like to think that you don't like change, you can be scared to
lose what you have. Can be scared of change. It can make you feel nervous and that's okay, that's very normal, but it doesn't have to lead to procrastination and putting off things. Now, the last one that I have for you, as one of the reasons is being worried about what other people think, and what other people feel. So I guess that actually kind of touches on my next episode that I'm going to be doing for you guys, which is how to stop worrying about what other people think.
Literally, that whole Workshop, that Iran is on this specific
topic. But when we are worried about what other people think and what other people feel, essentially what we start to do and what starts to become a bit of a habit or a pattern is you start to put what you think and feel second, this can be a bit of a gradual change, it can be something that's like oh I'm just doing it every now and then but if it starts to become more of a pattern and more of a habit for your brain, all of a sudden, you're so worried and concerned
about what everybody else is thinking and feeling And what their days are looking like and how you can be the helper and be that person that's there for them and helping them, and worrying about what they're thinking and feeling and taking that into account that you forget to connect with yourself and check in with yourself to see how you're actually thinking and feeling and what you want to do about that. So, I've got some different tools.
I'm not going to run you through all of them because I mean this is a sneak peek into what one of the workshops would be like and what the content is like and I can't give Away the whole entire workshop, for you. Because otherwise, why would you come and join up with bu happiness college, right? But there is some tools that I am going to talk you through to help you because I don't want to also leave you in the Lurch as
well. The first tool is, literally being aware of the different areas, of the brain, and getting more comfortable with recognizing that coming up for you. So recognizing that. Okay. I've got say these three things. I my non-negotiable things on my to-do. List today. And these are the things that I am getting done. No excuses, my non-negotiables this is happening. And then I want you to start to notice, okay, where are the excuses coming up for you during
that day? Then as well, like we said with the shower or but this is nice. It's nice and warm and relaxed. Like, I don't want to be moving things, I don't feel like doing that. I don't want to do that thing. Just be aware of it and call it out for what it is. Recognized it. Okay this is my limbic. I'm kicking in right now. This is my emotional reasoning, it's giving me an excuse that. Excuse feels good. I don't have to choose to buy into this excuse though.
I can just view it for what it is and this has been an absolute game changer. For some of my clients over the last two weeks that I've been working on this with is simply having that awareness. They just feel like, oh my gosh, like I understand myself so much more. I can literally see and feel this happening in my brain. and they've had multiple examples of this actually coming up for them where they're like, whoa, This is what I mean was talking about
in the workshop. I'm like my brain is literally doing that right now. I can hear my excuse that I'm giving myself and all I have to say to that excuses, know I can be better than you, you're just a thought at the end of the day, that's all excuses are his thoughts. Now, another one is also the five-second rule. So if you haven't heard of the five-second rule, I really encourage you to go and either read Mel Robbins book on the five-second rule, because she talks a lot about the two
different parts of the brain. And she is absolutely amazing. Amazing amazing. Amazing, definitely a leader in her field and she definitely explains the two different parts of the brain. Way better than what I can at the moment. But the five second rule is basically. So what she says is you've got five seconds before that emotional side, and that emotional reasoning. All those excuses start to come in and that you start to buy into them.
So the whole point of the five second rule is That if you give yourself less than 5 seconds and you are actively taking action already and moving through and doing the thing then you've got no opportunity for your excuses to even come up for you. So she has if you literally Google Mel, Robbins, five, second rule, there is so many different videos that will come up. She's got an amazing, Ted talk
as well. So I really do encourage you to go and look into that, but basically how I use the five-second rule in my normal day-to-day. Day life will be with the things. Like for example, getting out of bed, if you guys are over in the glow up, Facebook group, you would know that. One of the things I've really been trying to focus on that, I really resonated with our action steps over. Our 30-day reset that we did last month was having phone free. Time in the mornings.
I noticed that the scrolling was really starting to come into play for me in the mornings. And so with the five-second rule, now what I bring in is, okay? My alarms going off at 6, a.m. I alarms going Going off and I count down from five. So five four, three, two, one. Once it gets to one, that's it, I'm up. I'm out of bed. No excuses. I am up and my day has started and I started to take action and, you know, she's exactly right.
There is no room for those excuses to come up in that 5 seconds, then I'm not even really thinking about it. It's like I'm automatically just up and out of bed by using that tool. So, if you want to be better than your excuses, don't even give them an opportunity to come. I mean, and utilize the five
second rule. Now I've also spoken about the five second rule as a tool to be able to reduce things like overwhelm and things like procrastinating because Say for example, you have said I'm going to work out today and let's say you have bought into one of your excuses and you get up and
you're like, oh shit. I've got this email that I need to send or I need to uh, I forgot to do my meal prep, or I haven't cooked my breakfast or the house is a mess and that's more of a priority for me this morning at the moment. Okay, that's cool. Now, the reason that we can bring in all the way that we can bring in the five-second rule, here is okay, I'm going to make a decision. Now, is this movement today still a priority for me? Is it something that I want to do today?
And if the answer is still Yes. Okay, great. Well, when am I fitting that in? And when is that going to happen? If the answer is? No, and that's okay. It's allowed to be no. But what it means is when the answer is no and it's like I actually realize I've probably put too many things on my plate. Today, I'm feeling overwhelmed moving my body as maybe not my biggest priority today. That's fine by using the five-second rule, you give yourself five seconds countdown
from five to one. When you get to one, you make that decision? Is this thing? A priority for me today or not? If the answer is, yes, you get up. You do it or you allocate the time and no questions asked at that time. Is when it happens. Or if the answer is, no, it's not a priority for me today. Okay, well, that's getting past again until tomorrow. I am not giving this thing anymore. Brain space. I'm not thinking about this anymore.
I have too many Other things to be thinking about and focusing on. And that is what I'm going to do. Now there's another one, I mentioned that having too many options can lead to procrastination. So one of the tools that you can bring in is give yourself only two choices. This reduces overwhelm it reduces decision fatigue. So I know one of the examples that I really commonly used for decision. Fatigue is say, you've had a massive day and you get to the end of the day and you're like,
I'd really love a glass of wine. I'm going to go down to the body shop. I'm going to buy a nice bottle of wine and just have a glass of wine with you now relax, watch some TV and just chill out. If decision fatigue kicks in and your brain has made too many decisions. For that day, you get to the bottle shop and you're looking at the 200 bottles of wine in front of you. And you're just, like, I don't even know, I just don't even know. I can't even, I can't choose.
I can't even make a decision. That is decision fatigue, giving yourself only two choices. Reduces Opportunity for decision fatigue, it reduces overwhelm in your brain and it helps you to come to a decision quicker. So the question could be. Okay, if we go back to the working out example, am I working out in the morning or the afternoon? Am I having a sandwich or a wrap for lunch? Am I getting out of the shower now?
Or in two minutes? Am I watching one episode of this TV show or a my vacuuming the floor? Like, whatever it is, giving yourself to options means your brain has to choose between one or the other. So, this is something that can really greatly help you to reduce procrastination and self-sabotage. Now, the other one, That I really, really loved.
Now there's a few, like I said, and I'm not going to share all of them with you because if you want to know all of them, then you can come over and join over at bu happiness college and watch the whole Workshop. But the other one that I have for you is to embrace impermanence, and this one can feel hard, but it's accepting that there is always going to be things that are changing. There is always going to be other people's opinions and perspectives that you can't
control. Things are not always going to go according to plan and so when we can start to embrace that and accept that, as reality, it means that we're not holding onto things as much. We're not feeling so disappointed or frustrated when things don't go. As we were hoping, we are able to be more flexible with our days, with our feelings, with our emotions, because we can embrace the impermanence And we can lean into the fact that this is literally a fact of life. Yes.
I would have liked it to go this way or yes. I would have liked to be this this or this, but that hasn't happened. That's not how it's worked out for me today. And that's all right. I'm going to run with it and I'm going to be doing my best. To reduce those expectations that I'm setting on myself or on other people or other things. So you guys, that is it for me on procrastination and on self-sabotage today. Now, obviously, this is such a huge topic.
There is so many other things that we could be diving into with this as well. So, if you do have any questions, if you do feel, like, I'm noticing procrastination in this certain area, how does this relate or what could I do to be moving through this? No, shoot me through a question or a message and I'll answer it in the next few podcast episodes for you as well. Bye guys. Have a beautiful day. If you liked this episode, I would love for you to screenshot and tag me on Instagram.
You guys have no idea how much that absolutely makes my day. I get such a big smile on my face. Thank you so much for hanging out with me today and I hope that you have got them something from this episode. If you want to hang out more you can search the nourishing, Amy podcast community in Facebook and come and join our group. We're talking all things life, love overwhelm and everything in between, you can share your funny memes.
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