What Are My True Values, and How Do They Guide My Spending?

I'm Ralph, and it's so great that you've chosen to give me a little bit of your time again, today we continue our journey in answering that big question, how can I become a financially confident Christian? And we're strongly building a foundation in our new series called Beyond the Budget, finding Financial Freedom Through Intentional Living. We're really talking about intentional living. Yesterday we explored contentment and gratitude, and I really hope you caught that episode.

If you didn't, I'm gonna encourage you to go check it out. And today we're gonna ask a new question. This one gets a little deep. So be ready. What are my true values and how do they actually guide my spending? See, I think it's so important that we start to understand our true values and how they guide your spending. ' cause maybe you spend things on, things that don't really matter to you. I feel that way many times. Maybe for you it's a, a closet of clothes you never wear.

Hey, I'm guilty of that sometimes. My wife said to me one time, she goes, Ralph, on the second floor of the house, you've got a bunch of clothes up there. You never even look at. Guilty is charged. Or maybe for you it's subscriptions that you barely use.

You know, you download a subscription or you, you buy an app and you just never open it. I think about on my own iPhone, how many apps I have that I just never even look at. And a lot of times the issue is stuff just creates stress. We add more stuff. Trying to fill a void, trying to, trying to fill this emptiness and all that stuff

does is create more stress, not joy. It kind of, it makes you wanna embrace a minimalist life. And the truth is, when we really examine our spending, we spend by habit. Well, we always do that. That's what we do. We do this, we do that. It's a habit. Or maybe we spend by desire, oh, I want to do this, I want to do that. Or a lot of times, and I think this is one of the big problems we have right now, is we spend based on social pressure.

But notice I didn't say in any of that we spend based on our values, because a lot of times your spending doesn't reflect your values. When your spending doesn't reflect your values, that's a disconnect and that disconnect, to be honest with you, a hundred percent truthful, it causes guilt because you're guilty. I'm not spending on the things that I truly value.

It causes regret because the money's gone in. You're thinking, Hey, but what if I done this? What if I did that? What if I was more charitable? What if I helped my, my family? The trifecta of this, it causes stress. See, because right now as you're listening, you're probably saying, Ralph, I work hard. I truly do. I put in the hours, man. I put in the reps. You work hard, but your money doesn't serve your purpose. But here's the thing, and I want you to hear this loud and clear today.

Every dollar that you spend, Is a vote for what you value. I'm gonna say that again 'cause it's so important that you hear me today. Every dollar that you spend is a vote for what you value. Now you might be saying, great. Okay, that sounds good, Ralph. But here's the problem. If you don't define these values, society's gonna define them for you. And oftentimes, if we're honest with ourselves, we allow society to, to really define our values. In the end, God calls us to live intentionally.

I talk about intentionality is almost a whole point of this new series, and God calls us to live intentionally and to steward wisely. Look at the book of Proverbs. Open up the chapter four verse 23. It says this, above all else, guard your heart for everything you do, flows from it. Now that's impactful. If you think about that above all else, above anything else that you do, guard your heart for everything you do, flows from it.

Your money flows from your heart because it's something that you do. Right? And when our values align with our financial choices, when we really think about this is what my values are, and we align those with our financial decisions, with our spending choices, then money becomes a useful tool for joyful purpose-filled living. 'cause in the end this is about stewardship, not restriction. A lot of people say, oh, Ralph, here he goes again.

He cannot talk about where I can't spend money and I shouldn't spend my, it's not what I'm saying at all. But when you align your values with your spending, that tool now becomes a joyful purpose-filled living, and you're able to live in abundance, not restriction, and rather than stress and want and guilt and fear. You live in a place of joy and clarity and peace, and hey, isn't that what you want today? So I've sold you on that. Now you're saying, Ralph, what can we do?

How, how do, how do you spend in alignment with your true values? Well, here's where the solution starts. It starts by identifying your core values and aligning your spending to match them. And then you've got to just say, look, I'm gonna let my values guide every single financial decision that I make. And now I'm gonna tell you how to do that. Here's your action step for today. I want you to identify your top three to five core values.

Spend about 10 or 15 minutes just reflecting on what are your true core values, what matters most to you? Is it family? Is family important to you? How about your faith? You're listening to this, I bet faith is important to you. How about your health? A lot of people say, we hate with health. Health, I don't have anything. Maybe it's freedom. It's the ability to not be chained or in that, in those cycle of financial shame.

As I talked about, maybe one of your values is generosity, and I just want you to, to spend about 10 or 15 minutes and just write three to four or five of those. Write them down. For example, we talked about faith. Maybe, you know, staying spiritually connected and trusting God's provision is important to you. If it's family, maybe prioritizing time and and caring for loved ones is important to you.

Maybe maintaining your physical and mental wellbeing is important to you, or having margin and flexibility and not being controlled by money or as I mentioned, generosity, helping others through giving and through service. Just write 3, 4, 5 of those things down and really put them pen to paper, and I want you to do that. I want you to go back, and this is the hard part, review your recent spending. I'm gonna do what I call the values test.

Look at your tracker, look at your budget and ask yourself this very difficult, deep question.

Does this spending truly reflect my values? As an example, let's say you're, you're, you're all about health, but then you look at your spending and you spent $180 on fast food last month. I don't know about you, but I don't think that's very healthy. I'm not judging you. Your value is health. And then you went and spent $180 on fast food last month. And if you, if you're honest with yourself, that doesn't align with your desire to feel better and live longer.

Now, maybe one of your values is generosity. It's a great value to have, but your budget shows no giving to churches or any causes. You're generous, where if generosity matters to you, you may wanna reallocate some of that discretionary spending. So rather than doing the things that you're doing for fun or whatever it is, if generosity is important to you, then allocate money to that. Maybe for you family's valuable.

You're, you're paying for four streaming services but haven't had a real family night in weeks. Yeah. You've got the streaming services coming in, you've got the Netflix and the Prime and the Paramount, whatever those things are when you look at your spending, you haven't really had family night in weeks.

So maybe for you, you gotta cancel two of those services and just use that money for a weekly family dinner, or go for a hike or go do something fun as a family, not worry about those doggone streaming services. And then I just want you to do one more thing, and that's plan one. Value aligned change. You made those core value decisions, you looked at your spending, and just pick one decision to change this week. Whether that's cutting an expense, redirecting funds, maybe saying no to

those impulse buys because this is where the rubber meets the road, my friend. You make your money match your value. So let's say we get back to that health thing and you say, well, here's what I'm gonna do. I'm gonna skip takeout and cook a healthy meal at home twice this week, and I'm gonna use that savings to buy quality grocery shop the outside of the store, as they say. Maybe faith's important to you and you're gonna begin tithing a small amount consistently.

Hey, even five, 10, $20 a week, because that's important. You value that so your finances honor God first. Maybe for you, it's that freedom. You wanna cancel a subscription you don't use and put that even, Hey, listen, even 15 bucks extra towards paying off a small debt or building that emergency fund that we talked about. If family's important to you, maybe block out Friday night for, for screen free game time or dinner or or some kind of family event.

And again, if generosity is important to you, set up a $10 a month recurring donation to a cause you believe in, Hey, tie the two things together and as a family, talk about that. Can you do service? Can you find a cause that's important for you? Hey, these are all things that you value. I'm not telling you what to value. In the first step you mentioned you wrote down what you want to value and see, here's why this helps, because here's a truth bomb. Misaligned spending equals stress.

If your spending's not aligned with your value, you're gonna have stress, you're gonna have guilt, and you're gonna have what I called a couple days ago, that drift. But here's the beauty of what we've talked about today. Value align choices. When you choose to align your spending with your values. That equates to peace. It equates to satisfaction and it equates to direction. And then that tool, that money we talked about, it becomes a vehicle for purpose. Well, let's pray together.

Father God, we thank you for giving us purpose and giving us calling in our lives. And we confess, Lord, that we often spend without direction. We just go with whatever society tells us to do. We don't really look at our core values and the values that are important to You. So, Lord, we just ask first, that you would help us identify our values and then align our choices with those values. God grant us clarity, grant us wisdom, and grant us discipline, Lord, to let our money glorify you.

And we ask this with confidence. In Jesus' name, Amen. Listen. When your money votes for your values, peace follows. So I just wanna encourage you, take time to today to identify your values. Make one aligned financial choice, just one ' cause you're moving towards freedom. And if you know someone could benefit from this show or benefit from this episode, I'm just gonna encourage you right now to share the show with them.

It's a lot of people out there that are struggling and they need some hope, they need some direction, and I bring this show every day to help build that hope, build that momentum, and build that direction in a positive way, grounded in scripture. So I just wanna encourage you, share the show with somebody that you know that could benefit from this. You could point 'em right to our website that's at financially confident christian.com. It's real simple. Go and send them a text.

Just say, Hey, check this website out, or send them an email.

Hey, check out financially confident christian.com. I also wanna give you a gift today. If you go to my website, financially confident christian.com says Master. You can get a free copy of my book. It's called Mastering Your Finance. It's just a quick read, but it will be so impactful and it's absolutely free when you go to that website, financially confident christian.com/master. Now, tomorrow we're gonna talk about trust. We're gonna be talking about trusting God in uncertainty.

How to make him the anchor of your financial peace. So I'm gonna encourage you, don't miss it. Let's go out there and be financially confident. Christians, you can do this. I truly believe in you. Believe in yourself. Stay financially savvy. God bless you, and you have a great day today.