Good morning.
This is Jean.
It's five point thirty and the morning I just woke up and I am getting ready to go out and make some coffee, spend an hour either you know, catching up on the news for the day or coming into my office and doing a little bit of work. And then Mike gets up at six point thirty and we light our candles in the living room. It's very dark here in Minneapolis when we get up and we light our candles and talk and have coffee, and then we meditate together.
This is finally a show about an eighty three year old pin up. Jeane Ketchum lives in Minnesota and is the co founder of Aging But Dangerous.
There's no age limit on living your best life. Jane Ketcham, founder of Aging but Dangerous.
Joins us happy to have our next guest on the show. Her name is Jeane Ketchum, co founder of Aging but Dangerous.
Aging the Dangerous is an organization of women that share stories, that do things together and during covid became an online business here in Minneapolis, and we just try to get information. It's very important to get information to women and talk about things that are taboo, you know, like fecal incontinence. Fifteen years ago women, it was totally different than women today.
At fifty years old. Fifteen years ago women they're empty nesters because they were having babies earlier than they do now, and so they were just traumatized about turning fifty. Susanna and I I was sixty nine. Suzanne she was sixty one, and she and I both have been really movers and shakers, so I mean, they just didn't want to do anything. She and I decided that we were going to just get them out off the sofa and doing things, and that's what we did, and we just have We affected
huge amounts of people. We started out with the big fashion show, dispelling the myths of fashion. Back then, they were writing all these books and all these articles on women and how you should wear your skirt a certain length and you should wear a certain pink lipstick. And I just went crazy. So we did that. We had five hundred women. I mean, it was like so successful, so fabulous. And then after that we did Martini Skydive, which I'm skydiver, and I skydived at sixty with my
ninety one year old dad. And then Suzanne said, okay, you got a skydive again, and I said, you know, so we can get people. And I said, I am not going to do it. Just for aging, but dangerous. But then one morning I got up one night and I got on the internet and I saw this seventy year old woman jumping out of a plane and it showed her going to and I'm like, oh my gosh, my heart started pounding, and I thought, so I called Suzanna about four o'clock in the morning, I said, okay,
I'm going to do it. Well, I am not kidding. There were We got one hundred and seven women all jumping out of an airplane from eight o'clock in the morning to eight o'clock at night. One hundred and seven. I went on a TV. I went on one of the local TV stations on Saturday morning, and I came home and I swear to you, and this is so true. I had one hundred email from women that want to skydive.
Oh I'm tired of looking at that picture, the.
Picture in the Star Tribune Variety section with me and nude eight by eight picture on the front page of Variety in the Star Tribute of Minneapolis. Let's say I don't get mortified or anything, but I do get a little I am a little uncomfortable with that.
All right, do we have a calendar?
I eat a calendar. I don't see it.
Mary.
Let me just show it to you.
This is our tastefully nude calendar. I really want people to see the purpose of this calendar and what it stands for. This is having fun. This is showing your spirit and style. It's women being authentic and being themselves. Of course, I always say it's not about the body, it's about the attitude. Well, this picture is I'm leaning on a bar and I've got cocktail bar like you know, with a drape behind me, and then I've got this really oversized martini class. I love martinis and this is
such a great prop. I've got my big honk and huge martini glass, and then I've got my jewelry because i love jewelry, and I'm leaning on the bar. My arm is across my boobs, but you can still kind of see the boob. You can see the top of the boobs, and my little, you know, fat back is in the back.
That's me.
I love aging. Being in my eighties is so much fun. Meeting new people and learning new things. I'm going to make it until i'm a hundred because I have people to meet and things to do. You know, Face got stage four colon cancer and she's really doing well. And I really she's the only one I had to really convince to be in the calendar, because she said, oh, you know, I don't feel like I just you know, getting like you know, things are just happening. And I said, Faye,
she's always been very feisty. And I said, you know, and I've known her a long time, and I said, Fae, you have this is going to be such a good legacy for your family. She's got a daughter, she's got granddaughters, she's got great granddaughters. And so she came that morning. She was feeling really good, and when we had the shoot and she she just looked fabulous and she's so glad she did it now, and this is Gail, she is.
She wrote the most fabulous piece. She said, Hygiene, I saw that you intend to create a tastefully new calendar. And for reasons I cannot explain, I think I would like to be considered as one of the women. I've never considered myself a beautiful woman, but that's the point. You can feel beautiful in your skin despite cultural pressures.
So here I am at sixty four cellu light dancing on my thighs, skin stretched to remind me of the babies once cradled within, thinking, of course, I want to show people that beauty isn't necessarily a look, but an attitude. Gives me cold chills every time I read that. So here, she is this beautiful little thing. You can just see her spirit in this picture. She's sitting on the floor, her legs are crossed, her arm is across her boobs, and she's listening to some music and looking up at
the sky. I mean, she's just so such a beautiful soul and always come.
In a light my little candle.
Oh wait, okay wait, I got to get my clips I use for moisturizer. I just used this nut Regina Invisible Daily Defense for thirty. It goes really well under this makeup. You have to be kind of careful to not get fun thing with silicon in well. I grew up in a small town in Kansas. Went for Kansas and my dad delivered bread in that town. My mother, as you can imagine, was not very happy about me
coming because my brother is eleven months apart. I mean, so that means she got pregnant like what two months or a month after.
My brother was born.
I mean it was like so she was not happy and I was not her favorite child. I I knew at a very early age, at nine years old, in third grade, that my mother was not going to be able to take care of me emotionally. And I knew I just had to be strong. And I started my period in third grade because I'd had an appendectomy and the doctor said that it was you know, i'd probably start my period early. So I'm sitting on the stool and this blo's coming out and yell to my mother, come here.
She saw it.
She went screaming out of the house over across the street to her sister, Maxine. Maxine, come here, come here, you know. And so they find and I'm sitting there on the stool and I'm thinking, good lord.
I don't remember.
I don't ever remember being upset with my mother or but I would lose my patience with her, you know a lot of times. But I thought, where's the kotex? I know it's a tr us the bathroom to the and that was a big bathroom. But if I go over there and get the cotext, so I'm gonna be dripping blood everywhere. So you know, I'm just gonna sit here until she comes back. So they came back and they're saying, they're wringing their hands. They said, mother, would
you please go get the cotext. So she's got the cotext and everything. But that incident, and I know that sounds weird, but that one incident made me realize that, you know, I'm in this alone because I didn't talk to my brother about stuff like that. I watch a lot of videos and makeup, and a lot of young women say, this is a cream makeup. No, no, a cream makeup. It does not go into the wrinkles and
that's what makes it so good. And then I come along and say, a cream makeup is good because it does go into the wrinkles.
So I say just the opposite.
I just like, you know, I just I just get into a teaching mode. I don't know, I really I don't know why. I really don't know why that I think I have to help women age, you know, And that's the way I mean in high school, they would be lined up outside the house and I'd be down the base and mother would want them come in at a time to talk to me. I always have been like that, and it's just it just has developed more and more just helping women, helping women get over their you know, insecurities.
I don't know where that came from, but.
I just wanted to help my friend, and I just wanted to help women get out of their ruts. My whole living mantra, if you don't like the way your life's going, then do something about it. Life is so much fun when you are who you are and you're not. You don't have the don't have to use the energy to try to be something else or something that you're not, because that takes so much energy, and that's just I don't want to spend all that energy doing that. And
then plus I have a husband that's so easy. That's not always you know, it doesn't always happen to women, but they still need to try to try to be their own person and not dress for their husband or do things for their husband that they don't want to do. In fact, I tell you I was one of my good friends. This is quite This is years ago. It's like fifty years ago, and she said she was so upset because she was a real caretaker for her husband
and her kids were off, you know. But she said, if I have to match up one more pair of socks for him, I am going to start screaming. And I said, then, don't do it. And she said, well, I don't know how I cannot do it. And I said, you can just not do it. Tell him he can match up his own damn socks. You know, it's like this,
don't do whatever, you you know. And then I was at Thanksgiving dinner with him one year and she worked so hard to get all this dinner on the table, and all be darn, we're sitting down there, and he looks up at her and he said, get me a you know, give me a glass of water. I looked over at him and I said, you get up and get your own damn water. She has worked all morning getting this Thanksgiving dinner together, and you can get your own water. And he looked over at me and just glared.
And she just jumped up and went and got his water. And I'm like, see that, when you do things like that, that is what makes and I talk about women, of course, men probably the same. But that is what makes you a cranky old person when you start aging, because you have spent your life doing things that you don't want to do. So you just stop it and don't do it anymore. If you don't want to match socks, you don't match socks. It's as simple as that, all right.
The most important thing I think is I use this mac color and plum to outline it. Really it makes a huge difference. It's makes your lips look fuller, and I really stress that. So it's back to that feeling good about yourself. It does take energy, but I find that the older I get, the more important it seems to me to get this out. That's why my next
step is about vibrators. We are going to Smitt and Kitten, which is a sex shop here in Minneapolis, and it's the best one, and honestly, because I want to check out vibrators for women. I want to get one that's good for a beginner woman. But women don't know what to do. I've got to help them. It's like I have to help them with I don't have to help them. I want to help women as they're aging and just let them know it's okay. It's okay for that, you know, for it to be you know, to use a vibrator.
And I want to go into the health part of vibrators, the health issues of vibrators. They help with urinary in continence, they help the pelvic floor, and plus they give you pleasure. And there it's a taboo subject. It's embarrassing. It's an embarrassing subject. We have our families and our kids and our husbands and all these people, but when it comes right down to it, it's up to you, kiddo. I've said these things for so many years that I really
get tired of hearing myself talk. And I really do. And it's like, for some reason, it seems to be important for me to tell my message.
Hello, thank you so much.
My name is Dianna. I'm the store manager.
Okay, I am going to go on stage. I'm writing a book and I'm going to be on stage speaking and I want to speak about vibrators. And so what I want to do is it's a topic that is still taboo, especially for older women, and so I want to try to get them more comfortable with the subject. And that.
Is what I'm here about.
Isn't it just terrible that it's still so taboo when it's just normal.
I like to what analogy I like to use with someone that's visiting our shop and that's very nervous about shopping for vibrators.
I like to compare it to.
The massage chair at an al salon. It'll work out any kinks or any tension in the back. It will help you relax. And there's so many settings there are like base like settings like the thumping feature or something more more surface level, like just simple vibration, and the same thing. It applies for these types of products. It's just what setting do you respond to.
Frankie and Grace they did a lot for the world by having that, you know, they developed their own vibrator and all that. I don't understand what the big fat ones are, and there's really big and fat are those? I mean what you don't put those inside of you? Do you?
I mean you do? Some people like a penis.
Some people like a really nice full feeling and the vaginal opening when aroused, it expands when you're old. It is a case by case basis and what the body responds to. But those larger ones, like there are some people that they like a fuller feeling to stretch out those muscles.
I don't want to go that that much, but I wanted to ask you there are a lot of women that have never a lot of older women that have never experienced a orgasm. I still say climax. I say climax, and my friend said that is an old fashioned word. Nobody uses that anymore, so orgasm. But and I think that's so sad.
There is an increase in older customers that come in look, and a trend that I'm seeing is definitely an increase in interest in external vibrators.
All my friends, it's the external I think that's what everybody kind of want. I can't imagine and anybody wanting to stick anything inside of them.
Now, well, let me show you a really great diagram.
Love diagram. And they have all kinds of stuff back there that you know, if you're an broken hip, you know, they have a slant thing that you can lay on to. Still, I mean, they have all kinds of stuff. I just am so impressed. Well, you know, like, you know, just different things. Of course, they can't go into that, and they don't want sex games. I don't want to get into any of the hardcore stuff. You see things like
it's like that rabbit. Everybody talks about the rabbit and I don't know what that what that does, but it seems complicated. I don't want anything complicated. See like these big knobby things. Does that win inside? I mean, is that supposed to be a penis?
Yeah?
Okay, so if you see here it's kind of color coded.
My group just did a tastefully I just produced a tastefully nude calendar. Yeah, and I, oh, did you about that? And I always call this the vagina and one of my friends says it's not. I always say, we covered the vagina and the boobs, and she said, no, it's not a vagina.
It's a the outside part what we see is called the vulva.
Okay, that's what she said.
Mm hmmm, vulva.
I'll be darn all right, my darling show. It's some simple, easy outer stimulation vibrators.
Okay. So here we have our internal stimulation shelf, and over.
Here we have I think those are scary looking.
This one here nice and slender. So vibrator just would be nothing. I mean it has different settings, different intensities. But you'll notice it's a very high frequency.
Vibrator.
So very buzzy is how we like to describe the sense.
Get it to the strongest frequency.
Sure, yeah, so this model in your hip pocket. Okay, so this is meant to be pressed up against the body.
It has a nice Oh that's better. Yeah.
So this one is going to be one of the more high end ones. It's the touch X by we Vibe And if you feel this one, you'll notice it has a nice amount of base to the vibration.
Yeah but that's okay, So you just put this on the the body. Wow.
Yeah.
And I don't know, but it just seems to me like when you get older, you don't have quite the it's harder to stimulate. Yeah, that's why I think that they need a stronger one and a you know something like that that gets right on the point.
Okay, keep hearing about that magic wand. What is that?
Yes, magic Wand's right next to us.
Actually, oh lord, oh see that is so scary it will oh yeah.
Oh good heavens. Yeah.
Okay, Well I'm gonna take some pic. Let's pick out what you did?
You are a doll?
Can we take a picture? Yeah? Okay, thank you forgetting that, No problem.
My granddaughters.
Take a picture, Grandma.
That's a very good job you did. That was like, maybe I would say you come on stage.
Fr next week on Finally a show. Magic is real. It's hard. Dreams are hard because you fail. You know you fail.
I fail every fucking day.
I fail.
But you got to learn how to feel and be okay with that.