Finally! A Show About a Gender Equity Commissioner Going Back to School

like this is my cousin, blah blah blah blah. And I remember that was the first time people had CD players back then, so I had the headphones on I was listening. I was like, Oh, this is so cool, you know, I can zone out to music. Was kind of like my hideaway, like headphones and a CD player and batteries. I was good, correct, that's me. Today marks the beginning of what I would say is a completion of a degree. I've been pursuing bachelor specifically, professionally, I'm

known as Jennifer Barnes, Palenciaga and Leek. I am missus Jennifer Lee McQueen, and I think for the beginning of school purposes, I am Jennifer Barnes simply. And we're riding through East Harlem right now, headed to Baroke College on a busy traffic field Monday. No better way I'd like to start off the week. I achieved my associates last semester and now I get to complete my bachelor's after. I guess this would be going into the eleventh year. So I'm excited and a lot of life experiences has

brought this point to where it needed to be. Is there anything you did this morning to get yourself in the right headspace? So I listened to David Bowie's when I listened to Lenny Prafits, Black Girl, I listen to Paul Jackson New York. I listen to Pol Jacks and Bulldozer. I am a music person, so that helps me get ready. I am pursuing an undergraduate degree in political science and

minoring in law. This would make me I think this is my beginning of my junior year, so end of sophomore beginning of junior is kind of where my placement is at this point within college. First class is Civil Liberties. From there, hopefully we can get something made somewhere around here and then go to the second class. Second class is European political systems, and the third is public policy. But that is on zoom Yep. They're all in the main building. Oh look, you can see the banners. We're

almost here. Seventeen. My biggest hope for today is to have a great ID picture.

was black. All of the black figures of leadership and trailblazing movements were kind of presented to me at that time. When I went to Kramer, my mother had started to figure out that I was into women's things heels firstly, and from there I think my mother was looking for my father to save me and bring me back to manhood. And so I went to live with my dad at

the age of seven and a half eight. So when I moved my father a few months after going to Kramer in Newport News, Virginia, which is of course a base, totally different environment, very structured. It was very you know, these are boys toys. I'll get you boys toys. We'll get your boy clothes. When I went to school in Newport News, I was made to do punishment if I talked, or because I was talkative, of in the corner, like I'd have to hold the push up position just because

I was being expressive. So the introduction of a black male at that time, because that's what I identified as and was, it's just a It was a lot. Once I school became kind of the focus, and then not just the focus, it was kind of like that you have to and then not just that you have to, it's you have to do better. And then with each grade it just felt like more and more and more was paling on to something that was already not being

dealt with like who I am, how I identify? School started to be something where I would ditch class to be with boys, Like we ditch and go to the bathroom, and you know, you learned about anatomy and atomical mod movement, but that was it, you know, not how to handle

yourself in those situations. So with that being said, I ended up in detentions and alternate school assignment so kind of like in school suspension, so you're removed from the other students in place with these students that they're labeling as bad or you know, disruptive, and you have to do all the assignments that are put in class, but

without any of the fun. And I think I was fourteen fifteen, and one day I came home and then was like a fifteen I was supposed to be in by eight, and my father would not let me in the house. I walked away from the house and I was going to my friend Sabrina's house, and my father apparently had come looking for me. He was like, well,

you better beat me home before I get home. Impossible in a car, And when it got out car, he like threw me over the hood of the car and was just really upset that I didn't make a home by curfew. I mean, that's what all of this was out for her. And after he left and that happened, I called the police. I went to some neighbor's house and I just called the police. And when the police got to the house, they basically blamed me and said I should be listening to this man in this nice

home and all this bullshit. And after they left, you know, my dad came into the room after I said, oh, didn't to go to sleep, and was like, well, since you don't feel so safe, you need to find yourself somewhere else to live. When I got to my mom's house, you know, it's a great time for a period of time, and then it starts to settle. End that one. You're poor in this space. Not only poor, you're dealing with

the mother who has issues. So I go to register for school and I was started in the freshman building. At this point, I had been held back about two to three times in school, and after three days there, I just couldn't do it. It was children. I dropped out. My mom the next day she said, come on, I'm gonna take you somewhere. We went on this trip to Cincinnati, and she was like, I found somewhere where you can

make some money. And I was like, okay. We wound up going to job Corps, the recruiting space, and the lady was like, well, you got two options. She said, you can either stay at home with your mom and she take you to class, or you can go to Dayton, where you can live on campus and I'll pay you a little stipend every week. And oh, well, I'll go

to Dayton. I had to shave my hair. I had a mohawk, a literally a literal mohawk, and it was blind ends and they told me, they said, you're gonna have to cut the hair, and I was I was devastated, but I was like, okay, okay. And when I cut my hair, it felt like my whole life started that At that very moment, I felt like adult had started for me. I not only past the ged the first time I took it. I graduated the same month as

my actual class was supposed to graduate. From the very beginning of me being in school, I graduated in May of seven. Like it was. I can't even explain to you how much all of that turmoil was meant to happen in order for me to understand what it means to be traumatized and get past it.

Right now, we're headed to the fourth floor in order to go to find where the second class is and then starting till twelve fifty and so we're just making our way downtown, walking fast faces past and we're class bound. I ended up meeting a friend of mine who was from Muskegan, Muskegan, Michigan UH named Torrianto and he he he was the introduction to ballroom for me. He was playing a Miss Jay Kuran beat and voguing in the courtyard and and I was like, child, I could do that.

And that was kind of the moment where I started learning how to vogue and dip and all this stuff. And I was like, oh, I love this. So he was showing me videos of you know, Sonaia, of Ashley Yaalanda, of Katrina, of Mika, of like all the girls that were the girls at that time, and I was just obsessed, totally obsessed. Just the beat, the presumptuous understanding that with this beat your meant to dance. Like That's what registered in my mind as soon as I saw voguing. I

they just like it's slammed together. It was perfectly pronounced that this is what happens. And so I've always been ballroom. I just didn't know how to express it. So at home when I was living with my father, looking on YouTube and stuff like that, my best friend Cameron, we had watched many, many clips voguing in the house all the time. One day we went to this mini ball in somebody's house because they're called many balls, and I

was walking the category of runway because duh. But the crazy part about it was I didn't understand the fundamentals of it. And I got on the floor and it was almost like everybody was waiting for me to do anything, and they chopped me in this house for walking this category. And the funny thing was when me and my best friend left, we was like that's the last time that's ever gonna happen. Like we were determined to be the

best Cincinnati had ever produced, right amazing. I gave him a business card and tell him how excited I am about that class. I'm really enjoyed the syllabus, so I'm looking forward to it because I got so much information just from today that had I not been in class at the appropriate time and listening, like I truly would have missed some very good points in some initial ways to study. Like I now know how my study it

needs to go. I feel like the first day of class is supposed to give you that, and that's what I got. I feel totally affirmed in the decision I made. The diversity that I've seen there today has been affirming as well. A lot of the interest that the students seem to have seem to be pretty much aligned. I mean, there's a probably a ten year age difference between myself and the majority of the ten years plus of myself and the students, so I think they're just a little

more excited than I am. Probably I'm like, yeah, when can I take a nap? Me and my best friend Sydney at the time was like we could go to one or two places, you know, replaces La New York or Atlanta. And I was like, fucking I mean, I had two trash bags and a suitcase and I got on that bus and I went to Atlanta sixteen hours. If I'm not mistaken, Atlanta was full of you could be whatever you want, but you better make it work. That's what Atlanta was built on. I ain. During that time.

I had contracted HIV In twenty eleven, I was at a club night. My best friend Camera and had come down to visit, and it was getting free if you just tested, and I was like, okay, well cool, we'll go test because I can spend more money on drinks at this point. So and got to test. My vest friend Guy as the results he was fined, and I got my results and they said, well this is showing up preliminary positive, and so my entire world was crumbling.

I was absolutely, you know, distracted by survival. How was I going to survive? Am I going to live? What does this mean for sexuality? How do I engage sexually with people with being HIV positive? All of these thoughts? How old were you on this? Twenty one two and it was just horrible. I had to drop out of school.

My grades were horrible, and yeah, I was homeless. I was sleeping on some friends who were still in the same schools couch for a while for a few months, I think, and I one day I had gotten into housing and founder program Evolution Center and they would give gift cards and resources and shout out to John Diggs changed my life. He recommended me going to the Grady IDP building anyways, that's where all the infectious people were going.

And so I signed up for and I was waiting around and one day I was able to get an apartment and downtown in this place called the Etgewood Center, and that came with supportive services. So the supportive services place was behind. So I moved in there. My best friend helped me move in. It's a room like this, a little smaller than this. And I lived there for six years, six seven years. The first four I cocooned

twenty three, twenty four. I was like, okay, bitch, do you want to be a man walking around in hills at forty five? And I started identifying with exactly what made me happy, and my womanhood was what made me happy, like truly being able to just go ahead and follow that path. And so the next time I had a doctor's appointment, I think it's a week or two later, I told him what I was thinking. You know, I would love to hear about options of that, and he

looked at me. The doctor looked at me and he said, I absolutely can see where that would go for you, and if that's what you want to do it, gave me a pamphlet and tell me he'd give me a week to think about it. That night, I called my parents and told him. We came up with a name, me and Ifat and Cody, and I chose Jennifer. My aunt Ifat gave me the last name of Barnes. She was like Barnes the name Salama, and it stuck and I became Jennifer Barnes. I called my parents and told

them that's what my name was. That's how I wanted them to refer to me. And yeah, I really focused on what did it mean to be the woman that I saw inside of me? What did that mean? What did I desire? How could I do that efficiently productively? I didn't want to be the same person I was before, So I got in touch with Chanelle Haley because I was changing my names at this time. Chanelle Haley at Georgia Equality in Atlanta, Georgia, and I was like, oh, they won't let me change my name. I had no

idea about how to do any of that shit. She listened to me, huh, because she's very about our business. And then she got me in contact with Emily Halden Brown, and Emily Halden Brown got me in contact with BT. He goes by BT, and he literally hand held walked me through changing my name for free in Atlanta. It was the most underground shit I had ever seen. I remember my court date. I have a picture on my phone of the day that I changed my name to Jennifer.

That was the first thing that I had really done in completion. And after I started doing that, I became an advocate for it becoming easier for people to be able to change their name. So that was my platform in the beginning, was being a name change specialists. Everything started to blossom once I started becoming happy with my decisions, being able to make my own decisions. You know that is truly, it is the truth. If you allow a

flower to just be, it will bloom. If you give it all the necessary things that needs it will bloom sunlight, photosynthesis is real, water feeding drinking is real, and food or pollination it does, it works. All those things work together in tandem. So I think all of those things. Internally, I started to understand and started to be appreciative of the opportunities. I was given the peace that I was able to sustain for myself and started to pay attention to Okay, now what else can I do to help?

Once I figured out legally that I was me that everything started to click. I got invited to come to a youth policy HIV Advisor's interest meeting and then they said that they were going to give us a stipend and I was like, oh, well, I'm set I this ain't sure, I'll do it. Absolutely sure will. The next week or maybe the week after, we had a meeting with state Representative Park Cannon. That was my first time. I think I have a picture of that too, of

like me being able to be on the bill. So it was the Georgia Legislative Black Caucus, and it was Georgia's Sexual Health Policy Symposium of twenty fifteen, and I was on a panel for voices of the epidemic black women, transgender people, black MSM, and LGBTQ youth. I felt like I was trusted in what I would, what I knew. I felt like this was the first time that I was able to really do things my way. And that's

all I've ever wanted, all I've ever wanted. If you be and anybody, they'll probably tell you that's the one thing about me. I've got to do it my way. My life skyrocketed. It was just like it just went up and it was the only person that could stop me was me. Okay, so I just reapply my lip gloss. After eating a delicious lunch at Chipotle, we are headed back now to European Political Systems class at Barot College.

Whoo yeah, ver y. I want to power. I definitely am a person that's looking forward to leaving d US. I'm not sure if it'll be short term or I'll be an expat or who knows, but I definitely am looking for future career moves. That's the goal. I'm looking to leave the US to become better acquainted with international procedures. I believe that America has a lot of growth to do.

Being one of the youngest nations in existence with so much controversy that could have probably been avoided if we'd only learned new and more efficient and inclusive and equitable means for Americans to exist row versus way being overturned, ways that we can certainly identify and find layers of how to make sure that those types of inconsistencies don't happen. The only reason why I'm able to pursue these goals today,

you know, it's because I saw Shirley Chisholm. This is the only reason why I do what I do, and she did, you know, the first. So ballroom prepared me to face any room head up, shoulders back, legs stretched for the stripe, like I am absolutely prepared to do whatever is necessary to make sure that equity is completely enforced. So barroom in itself is a rebellious movement, a rebellious movement of what we couldn't be included in. So if I can't be a lawyer, I'm going to portray a lawyer.

If I can't be a runway model, I'm going to portray a runway model. If I'm not asked to be a beauty queen, if I'm not allowed to compete as a beauty queen. I'm going to portray that within ballroom. That's what the face category is for. You see the presentation of life in America. It truly is the most beautiful mockery of it. That's what it was created for. Because you won't let us in, we'll do it ourselves, and we'll do it probably even better in ninety nine

percent of time. That's what happens. You know, everything glamorous comes from ballroom. Believe that we're talking about mainstream of black and brown ball room. And for me, the highest house in the land was always the House of Balenciaga. I have been approached by the House of Mizrahi, the House of gar Song, I'd been approached by House of Ebony, I had been approached by the House of avant Garde, which I did have a lot of mentors during that time.

In that house, I helped impost group with a voter registration and at the voter registration is where I ran into the legend Rico Balenciaga again, and that's where he said the statement about how aga ish I was starting to look and carrying myself, and you know, he knew I was there doing then, so he was like, you know, I see what you've been doing, and I want you to be under my care. I'm gonna, you know, help maneuver you. But I want you to come to a

house meeting. Being a part of the House of Lincayat. I got in for, of course the work that I was doing. But I am a talent and so walking runway is my thing. I am a multiple of the year runway winner in multiple states. I'm not just one in Atlanta. I have won also in Philly. I've gotten awards in Milwaukee for what I do in community as well as being a presence on the floor. I am to read the Constitution and its entirety, so I'm going

to take pieces. Today. I got through article one and started article two, so I want you at least be done by about five articles. Wednesday is the next time I see him, So we're going to go over two and three strongly. So if I can get those strongly under the veil, then I should be fine. Student life, I wonder if we're I want to go in there because I want to see how I can buy some what we call it paraphernelic. Hello, So I know that we don't have a bookstore, right, so how do I

get swag? We used to have a store, bookstore, But they tell me in the library, why right, bring back the bookstore? I'm heard, so like, literally, no, no anything sold here. If I started a petition, would you sign it? I love in order to be taken serious and make sure that the funding that I deserve is given to me. I have to have credentials in my line of work.

And for what I am a woman, you know, women in America eighty six cents to every man's dollar, you know, and that's if you're getting You're just due a pay. So now I wanted to make sure that educationally I was garnered the respect that I deserved. That's what made me go back to school. I'm great at advising, so if I could advise specifically on international terms, then there's not many people that are doing especially trands, that could do that. I can do that. I am certainly well

equipped mentally to do that. My husband knew that that was something I wanted to do, and he would always say that you can do it. Everything about school I did myself. My husband didn't help me anyway get started. He don't pay for any of my books or things. I've gotten multiple scholarships, I've been on Dean's lists. I've written essays to get extra funding from private donors. I've worked really hard, and it's just showcasing to me that if you just do what needs to be done, what

you desire will be given to you. Alright. It is currently ten fifty two, the night of Monday. It is the first day back to school. I feel like the day has been completed. I am extremely thankful for such a consistently structured day.