Mo Welch • Films To Be Buried With with Brett Goldstein #275

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It's only films to be buried with. Hello, and welcome to films to be buried with. My name is Brett Goldstein. I'm a comedian, an actor, a writer, a director, a Chuck E cheese, and I love films. As f Scott Fitzgerald once said, I was within and without, simultaneously enchanted and repelled by the inexhaustible variety of life. Yes, bo Is Afraid is long and exhausting, but it's also endlessly inventive and wild and original and funny and wonderfully ambitious

Here she is.

I can't believe it. Can you believe it? It's my world?

Oh my god, what an intro. Thank you.

I am here with my works here in New York City. The strike has ended.

Yes, it's ended.

Congratulations, finally act again.

I am here in New York City doing my stand up talk show. My work has been opening for me, my work. She is a fantastic, wonderful comedian and far too good to be opening for me. And somehow, basically, through some nefarious shenanigans, I have tricked her into coming on tour with me, and she's sort of doing so well that.

I might have to fire.

Anyway. Here we are. We're in a hotel room in New York City.

How are you? I'm great. This is the best gig ever. I'm so excited. I mean, New York we just met. We just met. Think, I mean like that was crazy.

I think came to the show was one of the greatest notes and of all of our lives.

I imagine she does look at stand up and she's like, why are you not moving more?

Because her hanging upside down? Yeah, it does look pretty lame. And also neither moment or myself are massively moves on stage. So we take up about a meter of stags.

We could really do it, like all the steps up to the stage.

Anyway, I love to see you now you.

Do I do comedy, Yeah, I do writing.

You will say, well, it's unique about you. I think it's that you said draw yeah, and you're you're doing the show or have done?

Tell us about this show with the.

Drawer I was last year. I spent all year putting together a show where I could have my art happening behind me as I spoke. So I had to have the words had to be like word for word, and I couldn't mess up any word because the word would like trigger the drawing behind me? Did you trigger? No? I had somebody doing it for me because it was like it was too much to do all of that. Yeah, weird. I started to draw like I used to be an artist, like when I was a kid, and then I gave

Can I share something with the listener that you showed me? And if you want to cut it, we can.

Yes.

I think it's a truly beautiful thing.

My showing picture of her daughter on a bed, and on the bed is a pillow behind the daughter's head, and a pillow is a pillow from most childhood, when I was five. And it's a drawing that you were asked to do by your mom. Yes, self portrait, mm hmm. And it's a portrait of a very simple drawing, but very good, clear drawing of like a slightly sad clown. Yes, you were five years old, and the elements of that five year old drawing. I think I didn't blair. Yeah, and it's really amazing.

I never even put that together, but yeah, that makes sense. My mom is a seamstress. She's an electrosian by trade, but she's a seamstress. And she had us to a self portrait and then she copied that and she didn't make any changes. So I have blonde hair and a clown mouth and then the clown flower coming out of my I had address and no arms.

It's so interesting, she said, a picture of yourself and.

Then look at us now clowning around.

Clowning around the NYC. Yeah, yeah, beautiful. That so you're doing with me, which means you leave behind your your wife and baby.

Yes, yes, yeah, I know people are always so worried about that. It's so funny.

No, you're always talking to the right.

And you know how it is. It's like there's weeks where there's no shows at all, and then it like comes back and you know, it's ebb and flow with my wife as in the industry, and she's a writer, so some days she's like on set forever and then I'm there.

So it's just, yeah, one thing we have to talk about, something about a little specially you want to tell us about Oh.

My gosh, this podcast. You're just trying to prop me up, aren't you.

Well, I have to be careful.

I don't these it becomes successful that you whenever I make it, no, that I'll be successful.

Yeah, it's kind of like I like this. It's actually a choice that I'm not as successful. Yeah. I have a special called Dad Jokes coming out on Beeps, which is part of Live Nation, and it comes out on December tenth.

And it's not like a normal special, is it doc it's a docu you.

Have a funny story about it's just.

Watch comics Unleashed. No, it's on in the hotel room, like honestly, like tonight it'll be on.

But it was.

It was one of those shows where they'd have four comics on and it was on forever, still syndicated, and it's just like that. They're like, so you have you don't like to be on an aeroplane do your Brett, you know, and then you just like it's not, Yes, that's great.

Specially it's kind of different. Huh.

It is different. It's a it's a docu special. So what happened? I mean, I realized in the pandemic, I have all these dad jokes jokes about my dad, and I haven't seen them for twenty years, And so the whole conceit of the special was first just a documentary. It was like, what if I go tell all these dad jokes kind of on the road in shows, and at the same time go travel to see my dad for the first time so that I could like get some new dad jokes. And it ended up being an hour special.

Did he know you were coming? Did you surprise him?

Well, you'll have to see. We'll have to see. Does he even show up at the end.

When we have to Hell, then we have to write December.

Tenth, Yeah, December tenth. And if you want to fast forward, it's probably like a minute fifty two fast forward through all of it.

The skip to the end.

All right, yeah, oh, I got it. I need these jokes on the way.

Oh my h hip. Let's tell you something, God, this is mad that I haven't told you that. Because we've been hanging out a lot, you'd think it would come up, and I just haven't. I think it's partly that I haven't found this sort of right time to say it. But I just keep forgetting it as well. I get caught up in the present. I guess that's good. I think it's good, but it also is like bad when you find out what I haven't told you, I think you're going to be.

A bit annoyed.

But because I have told you, yes, well i'll just say it. You're not offended.

But you you've died. You're dead. Sorry, I thought you were to say I was fired.

This is this is amazing.

You're dead? Wow? Dead? Wow? How did you die? I don't want my death to be funny. But have you ever seen Frasier Kelsey Grammer fall off the stage? I have a friend very sad. Yeah, you die. That's how I died. It was on tour with you, and it was a very high stage. Is this why you don't move? It? All? This why I don't move death. That's why I stay in that one foot square you just took one day. Yeah, there's Oh my god, I have this. I have this under this clip of this comic. Have you seen. Yes.

I can't believe that's real because of what.

His because what he was saying he was he was just talking about pegging. Just imagine like the part of your set where you're like kind of like, well, this is like gross, but I'll get through it, and you fall off and become viral that So yeah, I was telling I have this new joke about my my bush going through t s A, and I was pretty nervous about telling that joke because people don't really want to hear about that. And right in the middle, I fall

Bread full of smack your head in the seat on am No.

It's like there's always like a chair right there. Yeah. And I kind of like scissored it in a way where I kind of yeah, what sliced you up? The minute sliced me right up the middle?

There's the best show until you split parts.

Yes, And it was like a snake where they're still moving. Part of me was still like has a microphone?

Yeah, what did I do?

It is brutal? Guess, Yeah, I mean you can't. I mean it's a hard act to follow. Yeah, but yeah, they paid to see you.

Yeah, but did they sort of quietly sort of clean you up as I Yeah.

They're just like, there's many more openers.

Just ignore the snakes two times of mind that it's just slithering on your floor.

We turn off her microphone.

Well, it's not the worst way to go. No, I prefer it if you made it like I just did on a Banging a punchline. You were in the middle, and I feel awkward.

I know them with that, it feels.

But I don't think that will be their takeaway.

Yeah, you know what I mean.

I think I forget that they were wading out about your bush.

I don't know. I think maybe the headlines are going to be like and then you're going to have to tell them it was actually like, it wasn't completely true what she was saying. It was more of a joke.

Guys, listen, we're all going to miss my bird. Just for her legacy. I think it's important her bush did not set off the next ray machine. Okay, that's that's what.

I Yeah, it was just it was a joke. And then and then there's this whole other movement about truth and comedy and like it.

Was an emotional truth.

Yes, and I get in trouble for that post. Believe it it is political.

Do you worry about death.

Yeah, I think a fair amount more in COVID. I feel like I would wake up in the middle of the night worried. But yeah, sometimes, like in these hotel rooms, you're just like, you know, we're comics on the road, but luckily we're not like huge partiers. Oh really do you know who he is?

Ja? Yeah, so you worry about dying in line in the Hotelrea.

Yeah, that's why. I honestly think that's kind of why I will fall asleep setting up a little bit.

I don't know, No, I'm.

Just like I don't think I can die halfways for some reason. Yeah, I'm just like that, Like I'm like, you know, I'll be like this, and I'll be like on TikTok, and then all of a sudden, I'm just like sleeping because like, for some reason, I'm like, well, if I'm propped up, it's almost like a choking hazard, Like, well, if I'm propped up, I can't die.

I think that's true.

Yeah, no one's ever died setting up.

In fact, do you worry more about death since you've had a kid or the same When did you first start worrying about death?

Do you remember, well, when I was twelve, I stopped going to church because I would go to the cemetery and I kind of just, I don't know, I think I was aware of death and I was like, wait, y'all the shit they're talking about can't be real and people are really just dead in the ground here. And so at twelve, I really was like, Okay, it does happen. So you have to make.

Some goals sanguine. So you think there's nothing when you thought that when you were twelve, Yeah, you think that's just blackout, Yeah, silence, nothing.

Nothingness, nothing. Yeah, it's hard.

You really think that, you imagine I actually.

Do think that. Yeah, but I would love to be proven wrong. Well guess what, buddy, boy, you're wrong.

Oh my god, it's amazing.

There's a heaven.

You're welcome despite your abhorrent views on death. Oh my god, I'm You're welcome because it's so it's all loved.

This podcast is just like a church. Yeah, you love it.

Here, there's a heaven, your weapon. It's filled with your favorite thing. What's your favorite thing?

Films? Okay, yeah is it? Oh? I thought that I thought we were improvising. What is my favorite thing? My family?

I think you're gonna regret that. Yeah, right, you come to heaven. This is absolutely jammed packed with your family. It is nothing but your family. It's your family everywhere.

Amazing. That would be the nightmare.

That's what you chose, and I'm happy for you. So all your family are there, all of them. Yeah great, and there's like replicas of them and they're clowned and they're everywhere, and there's your family.

Welcome to heaven. They're all excited to see all your family in heaven, all of them.

Yeah, that's all. Yeah, that's your family. Yeah right, hell is in heaven. Yeah, hell is it your family?

Okay, Heaven, Welcome to heaven. But you're wishing for nothing. They're very exciting. They get family and they love you and they've all missed you, and they want to talk to you.

About your life.

And they're like, well, we know it loves about your life. As we get family, we know everything about your life. But what we don't know is about your life through film. Necessarily some of it they probably do know, but nonetheless, up the first thing they ask you is what's the first film you remember seeing my work?

I mean, you're going to love this a little Mermaid.

Yeah, and it's a great.

It was the first movie I saw in the theater. Wow, I was I want to say it was five or six and my mom brought us to the movie. Was my sister, Mikayla and me and Sandra, and she brought the three of us to the movie. It was like a huge deal because we were really really poor and we get there.

Which cinema is it?

It was it was in normal Illinois. Yeah, and she there's five. I'm the second, so at this time there's only three of us. She brought us there. It's kind of an iconic story. I mean, it was like such a formative story for me. During the credits at the beginning, the movie hasn't even started yet, my mom was like, we're leaving the movie a very first movie. And I was like, what are you talking about? And she's like, Mikayla pooped her pants. She literally shit her pants in

It was my first Yeah, so your first memory of film is a yeah, did you go back and see little movie?

We must have waited to talk came out on tape, but it was the you know everyone, I had a sleeping bag and everything. It was all a little Mermaid for me.

Do you have PTSD now you go to I mean I don't really go to the movies.

Yeah, it's probably linked.

Yeah, what is the film that scared you the most?

Do you know the film Fire in the Sky?

I know that film, okay, I saw and I think about it a lot. It was a film in the nineties. Yes, based on dB Sweeny and it is about the true story of an alien of duckts hit. Yeah, and it was his story, very straight and for real. I've seen it terrifying, tell me.

So. My dad had no filter on what he was like. He didn't have that thing where it's like, oh, I should turn this off there like little kids in the room. And there's a part in that film where the aliens clamp his eye like this and then put goo in it. And my entire life after watching that, I couldn't do eye drops, Like my mom would have to like put her knee on my chest in order to put eye drops in, like when you get pink eye. It was

Yeah, I wonder if these things that good for us?

I think, Yeah, I've been up so many films and it probably changed the course of.

My life because you're like, what is real?

I'm sure I mentioned this on the podcast What There's a film called Frozen, not that one, the other one, and it's about three people stuck on a ski lift, like the resort closes down for the weekend and it's like Friday night and they're high up on the ski lift and the film is the three days and then like trying to survive in the as they're being frozen alive and they're terrifying. Scene in it where one of the guys is like this is a spoiler, skip ahead

No no, no, I got skin all the time. I've been stuck on the left many times.

But legs, legs, they could just pop out. It's so horrible. And Tenny sort of loops like a trauma where I'm like, that didn't happen.

It was in a film yeah, but I see it.

No, there are things. Yeah, and even in love stories you just go like, wait, how much how much of love is actually real or like a romantic situation? And how much is it like us playing films in our head?

Oh that yeah?

Yeah, I like horror films right, yeah.

What is the film that might be pryamized?

Are you a cry?

I am on the daily?

No, no, no, I can go a while without crime. But it takes like a movie to make me cry, or a TV show anything that has like anything to do with being a mother. Now, any film, any scene in a TV show, I'm crying, especially if they're like you know, it could just be a character to be like, you know, moms work hard, and I'm like, it's like, so I'm such a sucker now, but I did try it, Stepmom, Like I really remember bawling at Stepmom.

Yeah, of course, but that film is designed to make your right.

Yeah, I didn't cry Step Brothers though, Stepmom. And I was a kid when I watched that, so I remember. And then it's like I can't watch it now.

I know.

I'm like, I'm never going to be able to watch that film. I'll cry.

Who would you get to be the stepmom if you were dying, if you knew the night that you're going to fall off the stage and be split.

Into oh oh god, I want someone Sam can really get along with going to be You think Julia Roberts would be great, but it seems pretty straight love Rosie O'donnald to come in.

Yeah, yeah, okay, I think she'd be a great mother.

I think she would. Yeah, she's already got some kids, age change.

Sorry, yeah, yeah, okay, Well we'll let you know. What is the film that people don't like? It's not Criz you love it, unconditioning.

You don't give a ship when anyone says, well, a lot of my friends like this film, but I don't think Rotten Tomatoes does Rome Michell's High School Reunion It. Yeah, it's like comics love it, and most people do, but I just know it's like not critically acclaimed. And I'm like, I watched that movie and also any of like those SNL movies that had such bad Rotten Tomato scores, Superstar nightith Roxberry, like any SNL character film I like fucking loved Would you do One of Day? Yes? What's the

On the other hand, was this the film that you used to love? You left it so much and then I don't like this anymore for various reasons.

I mean, honestly, it's like anything with violence is hard to watch, Like I haven't seen because you know, in a while, but like that sort of film, those are hard to watch now, where like when I was watching them for the first time and I watched Casino hundreds of times. Yeah, and now I think, like the violence thing gets to me a little more. I mean it's not just like being a mom. I think I'm just like Jesus, Like I fast forward through all the violent stuff.

Yeah, I like people get hit. Mm hmmm, yeah, I guess it's does get.

And I think it's gotten more believable the way that they make the films. Yeah, the production value is just better. That's true.

What is the film that means the mice to you? Not necessarily the film itself is any good, but the experience you had around seeing it would always make it special to you.

This is another formative. It's like, I'd love to say something that I watched with you know, my wife, But there is a formative experience that's different. So it's not poop, but it is body. So my junior high boyfriend we went to the Lake Theater in Oak Park, Illinois together and we saw Gatica and it was such like you know, like going through puberty sort of moment where I was so nervous and I like had a sweating problem, so

And what happened when you go to the apppit.

I'm pretty sure he did have armpet hair. And then what happened? And then we saw another movie. I can't remember what movie we saw, but we saw a double movie. And then since I knew I probably.

Did you put your other hand up.

Like a baby, and I'm like, I have a boyfriend.

But it's such a formative experience, it's not I don't even know. I mean, like, look how it took me to get to his armpit, which is a classic ticket. Was he like he's he probably didn't even notice the like like yeah, yeah, you're like there's a bold move. A move no no other no, no other girl's ever done that. But that was that was a little bit of like the fun and the problem with like not having a lot of information and not really like you know,

What is the film that you must relate to?

What he got game? Yeah, one of the like films I've watched the most of my life, for sure. I think you know my dad was in prison when I was little for a while. Yeah, stealing TVs on multiple occasions.

What do you do then, I mean we had to drop them, run get away?

Yeah? Did you get a visit? No? I was little. Yeah, I was like baby, and like my dad was off on work release when I was what is the word I'm looking for? No, when they had sex to me, what, what's the word I'm looking for? Right? Yes? Oh what?

So like your mom came to like a caravan at the prison and they had six Yeah, and she made you.

Yeah, they made you.

Yeah. So that's how I came in the world. Yeah. Yeah, So I didn't relate. I mean I didn't relate in a big way, but it was just like it was there and I love basketball, Like it was just like every minute of my teenage life was just watching basketball, and there was like something to the like I love watching a movie where it's like somebody you wouldn't expect gets to like fulfill a dream.

Like that, I think you want to play?

Yeah no, I mean you could have, like I thought I could have, but no, there was no way ever. Yeah, but there was a love of basketball keeps you in the moment, and I think I was just like addicted to mean in the moment like that. M yeah, I'm bad now, I'm like Larry Burden this last year just like on the sideline on my back hurts. I'm so bad.

Do you tell me something I don't understand that you love basketball? You watch baickeybo Tempt. You don't have a team.

Yeah it's technically the Bulls, but like yeah, because I worked in sports before comedy, I at one point was like why am I following these like basically kids like trying to fulfill their dreams. And I just felt like, you know what, I need to like stop paying attention to these kids and like actually go find my own dream. And then a part of me is like I know we were talking about like just like the allegiance you

Have me you Yeah, meanwhile, now go back, you kind of have me, now you can't have me.

That's on you.

I get that. That's interesting, all right? Then here we go. What's the sexiest film I've seen?

My work? Blues enormous color. I mean, some of the lesbian films. People will say, yeah, but it was dis directed by a man, and you can tell, and you can tell, and that is a film where I'm like, I'm kind of glad I was directed by a man, Like in some parts, I'm like, I'm kind of happy, though, you.

Know, can you be any more specific?

What you mean?

That's the list they would like some vice.

I'm trying to think if I can.

What's the telltale sign of lesbian fan I directed by a man?

If you said, if you're watching a sex scene and you're saying, is that really how it's done. Then no, yeah, you're like, I don't think so. There's also a lot of there's a lot of tension in lesbian films. That one didn't have as much I thought, and I liked that, but yeah, lesbian films. I mean this is you know, directed by a man too, but like Carol and Tar was different. Portrait of a lady on fire, Yeah, that one's a woman. Yeah, but the tension, the tension, yeah,

That means a great film. I feel sad there's the troubled backstory. Yeah, that just didn't seem happy with that was made. Oh really sad because that's a good film. That is sad, that's brilliant and it's.

Yeah, well there are other like there's something about Mary. I mean there are a lot of movies that Adventures of babysitting, like where you're just like the lead is you know enough Elizabeth sho with a trench coat for me, I was like, I mean that was enough.

Yeah, Yeah, she's great.

Sub category traveling bone is worrying why a filmy founder?

I think you didn't know you think you probably shouldn't have cool.

I mean, that's a lot of that's a lot of films. That's a lot of like yeah, oh you know what, like Pearl Harbor.

Which depends when Yeah, that's the.

Hard part about those films is like, guys, this is about war and then there's like a full on sex scene to keep the ladies interested. Yeah, I don't know.

She's beautiful. Yeah, he's beautiful film.

There aren't a lot of films where they would pries me, like most films have sex scenes in them or sexual attention.

Is your answer, it's great. Yeah, never come up, never come up on the podcast. Okay, good, well, it's objectively, objectively, objectively the greatest film about my.

Words, Okay, I have a comedy. Uncle Buck to me is my favorite film of all time. Beautiful. And then Goodfellas, which I'm sure you've heard a million times.

That's yes, that's I mean, I can even say that. I'll never cut that. You know, I put a list on the home films that talk. I never put Good Fellows on that. Yeah, I love it. I'll never you can talk about you want.

It's incredible. And then from something more recent is Parasite because I've watched it. I've watched it a few times now because I just keep finding myself watching it again and I love it so good.

Yeah, hang on, good Fellas and uncle Buck, uncle Buck, well a devil Bill uncle Buck.

I mean, there's nobody better John Candy. Like when I think the fact that he's not here on earth anymore really bothers me, but he fell off a stage doing stand up, and everybody knows that it's the greater. You know, the end of Uncle Buck, he's in the kitchen kind of hiding while the mother and the daughter are having their moment. And I rewatched Uncle Buck recently and the

I remember a lot of that film, Like like that stayed with me in the same way that the legs feminine, that's not it, but in a better way.

We had a car like that growing up, so I'm like, it's so relatable just having this like nasty car sounds like there's like a bomb going off every time you park.

If we had a John Candy replacement. There's no junk candy.

Yeah, I don't think.

John Candy's acting. I think that can make me cry like that in ten seconds is the end of planes. I can watched that without having expressed the film and I still cry. Yeah, just that same.

He's an incredible actor, that's the thing. Yeah, he's incredible. Yeah, like anyone who's like super comedic but can like get you to cry like that.

He's mm hmmm and boy oh boy, so likable, lovable.

And Uncle Buck has it all it is. What's his face? Mcaulay Culkin, Gabby Hoffman, Yeah yeah, power tools, power tools on his head, bowling Yes, that guy. I'll never forget the moment where that that guy in the bowling eye. It was like being cool with his toothpick and then gets up with his mouth like a jarrito and you'm good Fellaws, good Fellas so good. Yeah. I mean my

Yeah, And I think it's interesting you bring Casino is the one that is too violent?

Yeah, I find it.

There's scenes in that I can't watch him, like, I don't know, we need to see this baseball pack constantly hitting this guy in the head.

I don't think we need to see that. Yeah, See, this is too much. It is, And honestly, I haven't seen good Fellas in a couple of years, so I'm curious if it would make.

I think good Fellas is not that.

I mean, it has nicety stuff in it, but I don't think it like it's moving too far like Casino is, Like there's bits in it that revel in it.

Seemingly right in the violence in a way that's really like you get it, You're like, put down the pen.

But it's brilliant. Yeah, what is the channel that makes you left?

Uncle Buck is? I can Okay, it's probably gonna be Uncle Buck because it keeps given. I keep watching it every holiday season.

So okay, what is it to be negative?

It quick. What's the worst? I really like bad films, you know what. I can't watch any of the like Avengers and like all of that. I'm gonna put them all in a category together, but like all of those, I can't watch them.

Yeah, I've watched.

Them, and I don't want to point out any specifics because to me, they're all the same. I'm just like, oh my god, one is this over? Like it's just a genre I cannot get into. So to me, if it's like if you made if you set me down, you're like you have to watch this like Avengers or whatever, you like, are you fucking kidding me? Like I just can't do it.

An yeahs or whatever.

And it's like like IP I keeping like when I'm want to play, and I'm like, just watch one of them.

When AI takes over it and there's three billion properties, there will be Avengers or whatever or whatever, it's.

Like three hours long, all the characters like yeah, and I don't like when all the characters get together. Mm hmm, yeah I get that. Yeah, you don't know. Yeah, it's just like are thyk from like different worlds? I just so it's like it's too much, like it's too much to have that many heroes. Come on, let's make it believable.

What is the film you could or have? What's the most over and over again?

I mean, yeah, of course it's Uncle back.

Second Place.

Let's see second Place. But I'm a cheerleader. I'm just gonna all bring in all the lesbian movies here. Yeah, but I'm a cheerleader. A great film, and I love watching it because it reminds me of being in high school. And I think Wes Anderson saw but I'm a cheerleader

Be you when you had first experience for the woman?

I was actually kind of late to the game. Yeah, I was in my twenties. It was after I started comedy.

And if we can, I'm previous that you didn't you thought about it a lot?

No, No, I didn't. Yeah, I had a long term boyfriends, and I was like, maybe kick in. At some point, I was like, maybe I'll really love these guys. At some point I was like waiting for the kick in. And then and then Comedy like broke me open in a way where I think I like saw the world differently and like was able to feel things finally because I was so happy, like like yeah, just like blissfully unaware of anything up until comedy. And then I was yeah, these big bodybuilder boyfriends.

Skin swave, skiny, skin smooth.

Yeah, if you have like one extra hair on you, that's obviously disgusting. So yeah, so a lot of these and I remember seeing that in high school, but I'm a cheerleader. And then some of these films like The L Word is a TV show. It's like I didn't watch that until I was already out, and so I kind of got to consume all of anything that was gay, like later.

When you had experience were you're like oh yeah immediately actually, like a girl at a bar in Denver.

Was like someone said she was interested in me, and I was like it was like the concept was so foreign to me. I'm just like, what are you talking about what do you mean interested in me? And then I think, like for the next week, I'm like, like, my heart is like pounding, cannot wait to go back to rock Bottom Brewery and in Denver. Yeah, no, it's like a chain mm hmm wi. Yeah, yeah, it's fun to to you know. I'm kind of happy in a way that.

I went with the boyfriend when you had Discovery, I had a boyfriend. Yeah, So then did you guys came and say.

Oh no. I was just like, obviously my comedy career is taking off. I'm doing open mikes in Denver. I'm like, obviously I don't have time for this relationship. You seem really into the outdoors, so I think we should go our own way. And I remember he was like, yeah, but comedy is a hobby, and I remember being so offended. And keep in mind open mic comedian. I was so offended. Yeah, it was like you're out not just because I'm yeah,

How long does it take you to just that's so interested though, to be that, like, was it like a week? And then you're like, hey, everything's says, was there any like struggle, like.

As this makes sense?

Yeah, I went back and it went back and forth, and like I talk about in my set, I haven't maybe well tonight. Actually, you know when I came out, I had some jokes already about my boyfriend, and you know, like when you first started in comedy, those first five minutes are gold and you don't have anything else. And so I wasn't out partly because I was just like many jokes, like what am I going to do? Rewrite my whole set?

I just changed the name to your girl's name, dis and these jokes, Yeah.

Exactly, gonna believe my girlfriend six ' five, that's part of this joke. What life. But it is people who knew that they were like you know, my age, like you know in early two thousands or whatever, knew that they were gay. I feel for them in a way because it's like I didn't even realize all of the like that all the films are so heteronormative, and then like every love story, you know that it's so niche to have a gay love story, especially back then, and

We like, like smoking, just telling me about really obvious references.

You ever seen Ellen, I'm like, that's so funny. It reminds me of an Ellen. So when you're in the dressing room, my only reference was Ellen.

Guys, do you want Yeah?

We see that? Yea fascinating.

So you did get back back and forth before you Yeah.

Yeah, I had yeah, you know back in the in the early days, I was just kind of it was just like dating around though really it was never like boyfriend. It was like old flames, that sort of thing. Yeah, until I could get that get more material, then I was off to the races.

It's good to see you get by with these men. Yeah, you're gonna have to just shout at this game with me for a couple of times.

Yeah, I got I've got like three more shows then I'm ready.

You've been wonderful. I was expected.

However, when you were opening for me and you were you having quite a good like it was going well. I'd say you've done ten minutes. They warmed to you in under the style. They thought you were funny and lovely and the charismatic and they're really into it. And then you started talking about your bus setting off the next ray machine, and it made them made them more comfortable. Don't think they'd mind admitting that it turned them off

You're into an audience.

You could send them pulling away.

And being scared, frightened, terrified, and you stepped forward. You didn't stay very still, but you thought, no, I must come to them. You know they weren't leaning in anymore. You must pan to them as you stepped forward to explain, this is humor. You don't of course, you were about to say, of course I don't actually have a book. I'm so sorry that I scared you with that imagery. And you stepped forward to draw them in, draw them close. But your foot went off the edge of the stage.

Straight through your head, perfect spleaming too.

And you went.

And you fell on the phone wriggled about two bits. Some people screamed, some people applauded. A few people ought to be said, Thank god, we don't have to hear about the bush anymore. I'm at the side of the stage. I got coughing with me.

You know what.

I'm like someone at the back and goes, well, of the days you guys and I come out. I go normally, I come out, so I hug you as we pass each other.

You know, but you're not there. I'm like, hey, guys, right plus for my welch.

And it's like this, someone stands up stand and go over, yeah, which is sweet, And I go, did you she's good?

Right?

People go just a couple of questions before we carry on. They go what they go, is she dead? And then I looked down and I go, oh shit, yeah, yes she's dead. Some more people clap. Another person stands up, and then another person goes, I'm really confused. Does she have a bush? And I go, I actually don't know, it's not really. What I can guarantee is that that was humor that was happening. I'm sorry if it's scared you, that's not what we're trying. We're just trying to all

You're stuck in the out there the two sides are you here?

And so I'm like, guys, I go, sorry, guys, I have got a show, but if we just can we put some music on something for a minute. I can't climb down the steps carefully because I know how don't like the chairs start peeling you off the carpet. But you're bringing chunks a cup with you. People are helping, Like, there's not ten or twelve people come repeeling bits of you, bits of carpet stuff you in the coffin. There's more of you than I was expecting with all these totally.

And on the other side of this movie night every night?

What film are you going to take to show your family in heaven when it is your movie night work?

I don't want to say.

Is it uncle but? Oh you just this private No.

I don't know if they want to watch Uncle Back, to be honest, So I'm gonna pick home alone because I know they all love that. It's selfless of you.

Is your your heavan? You really made the mistake in advising your entire family. Yeah, maybe you do something for yourself.

Okay, there's so many movies. It's like, I want to do a John Hughes movie. You can't. I'm going to the Uncle Back. I'm sorry I know, but it's when you get on the spot on the podcast, you just forget that there's any like that. There's more than five movies I know, and you do brilliantly.

Uncle Buck is a brilliant film and it isn't talked about enough, and you talked about it enough.

Yeah I did. Yeah, now you're gonna put it on your list that nobody can talk about Uncle back.

Because yeah, my wife, you're an absolutely delight. It's so great you did the podcast. Great for you on this tour. Is there anything you'd like to tell people to look out for and watch for?

Buy? Please please watch, I mean, follow me on Instagram for my art at MoMA. Welch and watch Dad Jokes when it comes out on December tenth. Just follow me on Instagram for updates and see if I meet my dad spooky. Thank you mate, Thank you for having me.

I have a wonderful day. I'll see you tonight.

I'll see you in part two.

Keep you tomorrow, keep your feet family on the stage to know. Please, thank you. Good day to you. That was episode two hundred and seventy five. Head over to the Patreon at patreon dot com. Forward slash Bret Goldsteen for the extra secrets, questions and video with mo Guide to Apple Podcast. Give us a five star rating. But right about the film, it means the best to you and why. It's a lovely thing to read and it helps numbers and it's really appreciated. Blah blah blah blah blah.