Glenn Howerton • Films To Be Buried With with Brett Goldstein #268

Look girl, it's only films to be buried with. Hello, and welcome to films to be buried with. My name is Brett Goldstein. I'm a comedian, an actor, a writer, a director, a pink panther, and I love film. As Frank Herbert once said, there is no real ending. It's just the place where you stop the story. Hence where the title of the film Never Ending Story is justified despite its running time. Fair play Frank Yes smart. Every

How you doing man?

How are you? Thank you for doing this? How's it going?

It's gone great. I have a question, is this is this on video? Are we videoing this? Or is this just audio? I've only listened to the podcast.

There is a video that goes black and white to the patreons like it's a film. No if you come to with that, or we get rid of the video. But you look fucking great.

Thanks man, great.

I got I got a I got a fresh summer cut, you know.

Fresh. Hello. Tell me There's so many things I want to ask you about. Let's okay, let's start at the present day. I saw your film BlackBerry. It's fucking excellent. It is one of the films of the year by a long shot. It's excellent, You're excellent in it. And what I really like about it, it's a proper like

Well, I appreciate that. I Yeah.

The weird thing is is I always wanted to be a dramatic actor. That was what I strove to be my whole young acting life, but actually kept getting pulled into comedy. And it's not that I didn't enjoy comedy. I did enjoy it. I liked it. I loved it actually, but it was never my ambition to become a comic actor. And then you know, next thing, I know, it's like all I'm doing And.

Yeah, but funny is funny. Some people are funny and you can't help it. And there's a lot of it's a lot of people who aren't funny. There's a lot of dramatic people who would love to do the opposite way. And I mean, you've.

Got the gift, Well, thank you. It's yeah, it's fun to look. It is very un touched. It's very I mean comedy is just really fun. It's undeniably fun to work on comedy. It's undeniably fun to come to work every day. And the object is to make.

People laugh, as opposed to to.

Make them feel things, which is great, but not as much fun as making people laugh. So I think in some ways I was always destined to do it.

I just was in denial for a long time.

And now I want to see what it's like to make people cry.

You can do it. You can do it ex When you were making but on BlackBerry. You've also got to be fair. It's a cast of comic act is actually in it. So yeah, by definition, who were all very, very very good. Was it funny on set we having a right old time between takes? Or was it a bit more serious?

I think because the tone of the movie is not overtly comic, even though it is funny. Yeah, everyone is doing their best to turn in a dramatic performance, and ideally what's funny about it is just sort of the circumstances, the ridiculousness of the situations, the absurdity of how extreme their decisions are, and et cetera. The laughing is almost more of a release valve so it wasn't the same as being on the set of a true comedy.

Yeah, but it was. But we were having fun for sure.

And then at the other end of the scale and the other end of your career, you started Always Tunny in Philadelphia, and forty five years later, you're still making it and it is now like the Simpsons. Rights as long as is it longer than the Simpsons? No? Oh, how long is it? Nineteen eighteen seasons?

Well, we've been on the air for eighteen years. The show is so cool. Yeah, the sixteenth season is airing right now, and we have been working on the show in some form or another for almost twenty years.

Basically, wow, yeah, okay, So here's my question on that, right. I would also guess this is all speculation that there was probably a point year five where you thought, well, this is going to come to an end and we're going to have to There must have been a point where you thought it would end. Then you made a decision for it not to end. I imagine that's gone up and down, and then it's like, oh, do we

That's I know your speculation is almost exactly right. I'd say about it was about year six, the season six, I should say that I started to get a little antsy to move on. I started to feel like it was preventing me from pursuing other ambitions that I had as a performer. And then I kind of came out of that funk for season seven and really hit it hard in season seven. Was very excited about it, and that was the last season that we were contracted to do at that point.

And so when we finished.

When we wrapped season seven, we didn't know if we were going to get picked up again, and I was sort of okay with it being over. I was really sad. I remember thinking like, oh, man, that's really sad if that was the last time I get to play that character and last time I get to do those scenes

I was like, I guess this is just who I am, this is my life. Yeah, yeah, this is who I am.

But you're but you're also right, like it's it's very seductive because it's a really fun show to work on, and we can we can go to so many crazy places that I think a lot of shows can't go to, and and I get to work with my friends. So it's a it's extraordinary privilege that I try not to take for granted, and I don't take it for granted, but there have been definitely times where I felt like, you know, there it was a golden handcuffs kind of situation.

Do you think between you, that sort of ebb and flow of that feeling. Do you take turns with that feeling? Do you know what I mean? Have you been telling the other one? No? Hey, hey, come on, it's the best time of our lives or is it only been used had that fit?

It's only been me? But I don't know why.

I don't understand why those guys are both so busy with other things. I'm kind of surprised. I think they just I think they were just able to have a little bit better more perspective on it maybe than me, or at least a different perspective, which is, hey, this is so fun, this is the dream. We should figure out a way rather than ending the show, we should figure out a way to be able to do both pursue our other interests and still continue doing the show.

I guess I say this like in terms of like legacy and stuff. It's amazing that the show is as good as it always has been, frankly, and it's like eighteen years. But like, was there a tipping point between like, oh god, what if we can't keep this level up? To No, We've got this, We've got this, this can

Definitely becomes more and more difficult each season to come up with new and interesting things, you know, But that's just by virtue of the fact that for as loose as the premise is, it gives us a lot of freedom. But at the same time that the characters have been established to have certain characteristics and you can't chang change those characteristics, so the challenge is less. And you're a writer,

And that's difficult.

Yeah, and you also have you can't particularly with your character, they can't change too much. It is I do think it's incredible any stickle on that runs for years and years there, but it because isn't the game. Like, for example, in this scene, the character is definitely going to be

Yeah? Right, and how do you do that?

Where?

Because one of my favorite things about early any entertainment, but especially in comedy is I want to be shocked.

I want to be a little shocked.

I mean, you know, initially, I think there was a lot of talk and always has been a lot of talk regarding our show about like us pushing boundaries or

Amazing and now you do this podcast so you can hang out even more. I mean, it just seems like you really like you really like spending time together. And I do think that's like a secret to my to my TV shides. I think the secret is if there's a group of people that genuinely like each other, yeah, or really that's you want to hang out with them, that's the deal, right guy?

I think that Yeah, I think that's absolutely right.

I think there's no you can't totally fake chemistry, right, There needs to be some chemistry, some real chemistry there, and we do. I think it's that that's an interesting dichotomy, is that our characters are so awful to each other, but we as people love each other and support each other. And and I think that that comes through regardless of the awfulness of the characters.

And I do think that's that's kind of the secret sauce of it.

Do you ask you this question? Maybe it's two personal and we can cut it. It's given that you kind of you're an ensemble show that started before any of you were famous. I imagine now you're all older, Miiser and Setive. Was there a period where you might be jealous of each other doing other things, or you know, someone going off to a film. How are all your egos managing your success? I suppose over the years.

Yeah, that's a very fair question, because I do think that that's something that can cause a lot of problems with TV shows. Right, if you have a breakout character, you have a breakout actor from a show who you know suddenly is getting all these incredible opportunities because of the show that you're also on, and you don't get those same opportunities. It can lead to a lot of jealousy and weird feelings and sort of like all of a sudden, you're not on equal footing and all this

But we're just not.

I guess I'm just I've never been I've never been the type of person to resent somebody else's success or or to feel jealous of somebody else's say. I mean, I've had I've had twinges of it. Certainly, it's not I'm not impervious. I'm not impervious to it.

But I guess for me.

You know, look, I love Charlie so much as a human being, as a person, as a friend, and he's always been so incredibly supportive of me, and I think he's genuinely made me a better performer an actor overall.

I mean not genuinely.

I mean, I know, it's like, yeah, no, I love the sense to it.

It's it's true. I mean, it really is, you know. And he stayed.

But he also continued to stay loyal to the show even after he started starring in movies. He didn't go, oh, now I'm gonna go off and be a movie star and you know, screw you guys and kind of leave us behind. He recognized that it was still a great creative outlet for him, and so maybe maybe I would have been a little bit more upset if he had

It was kind of the same thing.

I mean, he's I see his talent and his brains and his intelligence, and I'm like, it's almost more like I wonder why what took him so long?

You know?

So?

Yeah, I don't know, So I don't.

Yeah, I think it's just some of it is just I inherently don't really have that thing that makes me feel that way. So this is the nature of who who we are as people were. We never take each other for granted.

Now you're gonna make me cry. We're fucking seventeen minutes in piece of shit?

Who knew you were such a softy? Brett?

Don't tell anyone, right, is there? It is the deal. I've forgotten to tell you something, and I should have said it up to No do this. I feel terrible about it, but what well, I'll just say it. You've died. You're dead. Dead, You're dead.

What do you like? Actually dead?

Like I I actually got You're dead? Yeah you did? How did you die?

Oh my god?

I did? Yeah? Wow? Yeah? Do you remember?

Wait a minute? Mm hmm yeah.

Yeah.

Wow.

It's weird that I didn't know that going into this, because I guess I always thought that if you were dead, you you knew that you were dead. But now I'm realizing it's.

Sort of it's my job to intellgion. I forgot to be fair, so don't. I don't want you being yourself up about this.

I should have said, Okay, so you were actually charged with letting me know that I died.

Yeah, I think so it self. You know, you make your own business, you know what I mean? Like, yeah, and I wouldn't. I was hired. I sort of took the job.

I understand.

So now that you've brought it up and yeah, and now that it's all coming back to me, which is, I guess what happens when you die and somebody tells her that you die suddenly, now you you remember.

All the ways.

So yeah, yeah, so okay, here it's a little it's a little crazy. All right, it's going to sound kind of insane, but okay, here's what happened. So, in an effort to fulfill what was I would say, a lifelong childhood dream of mine of becoming Spider Man, right, what I did was I I purposely got myself bitten by a radioactive spider. And and it was first of all, that was difficult to find a radioactive spider, and it was difficult to break into the facility and all that

Yeah I could.

I could sense things sort of before they were about to happen or and I was also really really fast.

My speed just shot up. Is extraordinary, Yeah, no, it was.

And it all kind of happened incrementally over the course of like I would say, three or four days, just you know, Okay, suddenly I would notice these new these new things.

Did your family know we keep an it quiet?

I wanted to keep it quiet because I wanted to have the option of it just being fully like a secret identity type situation. I wanted the option on the table. I figured out a certain point, I would probably have to tell my wife just because you can't really I think she would start to notice.

Things if you were on the ceiling when you went to bed and stuff like that.

Yeah, yeah, exactly, or should catch me, you know, practicing climbing up the side of the house or.

Something like that.

You know.

The weird thing is that I couldn't I couldn't figure out how to get webs to shoot out of my wrists for whatever reason. That that that part of it wasn't working, and that that's part that's one of the most fun parts, right is shooting the webs out of your wrist and then you know, attaching it to buildings and like being able to swing around and you know, so that was kind of a bummer, but I kept I kept, I kept kind of working on it. And then one day I was, I mean, this is kind

Out, yeah, that's where they come from.

Yeah, And I was like, well, okay, I guess I guess that kind of makes sense. Like you can't expect to get bit by a radioactive spider and have your powers like be exactly like what you've seen in movies, because that's a movie and this is real.

And there's no hole in your wrist, so it makes sense. What were the webs coming out exactly?

Yeah, and I and I realized that in retrospect, I was like, well, yeah, worse, that makes that actually makes more sense. Okay, I can work with that, right, So I'll just figure out I can figure out a way to work with that, right because training in martial arts and training to you know, figure out how to get it to come out of my butt and still be able to swing by it.

Like I figured that was all workable, right, I could figure that out.

I just figure you've got to go. But first everywhere, that's the issue I see, is like you're aiming for like tops of buildings. You can have to be mm hmm.

But right, well, in my mind, I thought like, well, no, it'll come out of my butt, but then I'll swing it around and I'll just it'll be like sort of a thong situation.

But again, okay, okay, so it'll be almost more like.

I'm sitting on the spider web because if I'm upright, you know what I'm saying, and it's like coming this way, but then I could still kind of grab onto it.

I don't know, I hadn't like a sort of rollercoaster, see, like one of those hanging.

Yeah yeah, not unlike that. Yeah yeah, okay, right, yeah, So I thought this is workable. I'll figure this out eventually. But I be told that that was that the first sign. That was really when things started to take a little bit of a turn.

Jesus. Yeah. So here's what I learned.

The truth is like when you get bit by a radioactive spider, and this is true, you do get you do get the spider Man powers at first, but the metamorphosis doesn't stop there, do.

You know what I'm saying? Unfortunately. Yeah.

So soon after that, I started growing a lot of hairs everywhere, and it was pretty gross, and I was like trying to wax it and stuff like that, but it was just coming back so fast.

And then there was no hiding.

In anymore because legs started protruding from my body and I and I oh Jesus yeah, and eyes started appearing on my back.

Wow, it was pretty gnarly.

What did your wife say?

Well, she said, maybe there's something we can do. And I said, I don't know. I don't think there's an antidote for this. But we you know, she was doing a lot of Internet research and couldn't find any you know, stores of people who had done what I had done in real life. Everything was coming from my comic books. And she was like, well, this is all comic book logic. It doesn't you know, this is not Yeah, what do you do when I I boz a beer on your

Oh shit, Oh okay.

Yeah, not good. Not good. And I knew and then the thing is like I do, you know, not ideal.

And I knew it wasn't good, right, I knew it was a bad thing to do, but the spider stuff was really kind of taking over and I had a difficult time fight it. And I don't want to make excuses, but you can't really know what that feels like until you've actually gone through it.

That's fair, that's fair. I can empathize, I can, I can imagine, but I can never really know.

Yeah, exactly, But I did, you know, because I still had a conscience, I did turn myself into the police.

Ye.

Well they shot me on site.

Oh yeah, yeah.

Yeah, which is kind of an understandable.

I mean if if picture what I was becoming walking into a police station and put yourself in their position, I totally get it. I think anyone would would have shot me had they had guns. And they really they really let me have it. I mean they emptied their clips and yeah, yeah, yeah, it was gruesome. But but luckily, you know, I appeared in the afterlife, I you know, back to my bite yourself corporeal form.

As a as a human.

And you know, I think, honestly, I think it should be a lesson out there for for everybody, especially kids like you know, who think that they want to be Spider Man.

You don't.

Well, I think the lesson is more sort of be careful turning yourself into the police.

Oh yeah, maybe right right, I could have right, maybe that was a mistake.

I think that's that's the takeaway that you know, the Spider part possibly had solutions, but you you sort of idealistically went to the police hoping for sort of justice.

I guess I just really felt bad about like eating so many people, you know what I mean.

Yeah, Well, look, it's not the first time that's that's come up on this podcast. Many people have died that way, and it's it's not it's you know, we're very understanding here, we're very well welcoming to two people like yourself, and that's so so welcome. And don't don't worry, You're you're forgiven and it was kind that you do you and just and I just wish i'd gone to the police, but happy to have you here. I guess my next

Not something I really concerned myself with on a daily basis. There're been a handful of times where it creeps in, you know, But I don't really, I don't really think about it that much. How about you? Do you do you think about death?

Oh? Sure? Yeah? I mean, and now is I think about it in as a motivating force for me to get on with shit because I'll be dead, say, sort of my answer for everything I do as well, I'll be dead, saying, so I bet I should do this. Yeah, get busy, get busy dying right?

Yeah?

Do you do you think there's enough to life for you or everyone? You know? Man?

This weird thing was like, I don't. I really don't know, And I mean I guess, like a true agnostic, I don't know, and but I also don't feel like I need to know.

I think it just kind of is what it is.

If I had to say I believed something, it would be that I believe that God, if there is a God, that he has a sa to humor, and that if he really is all knowing and all powerful and created everything and created us.

I think he created us exactly the way he wanted us to be.

And so I don't think he's got a problem with what we're with what we're doing down here. So you know, I guess I just kind of trust that if there is that entity that I'll be okay.

And if there isn't, then it's just all darkness and nothing.

Well, let me tell you there is a heaven and you are welcoming it. I tell you for many reasons. One, everyone's a big fan of work. Also, it's the best death. It's the best death we've ever had. So you are really welcome with heaven. Everyone's like it's same, it's same people. It's legendarly or death Evan. It's filled with your favorite thing. What's your favorite thing?

I mean, I love watching movies.

Oh okay, then you'll you'll fit right in. It's filled with movies, screening rooms everywhere, perfect cinemas. As far as I can say. Everyone wants to talk about your life, but they want to talk about it through films. And the first thing that they ask you, Glenn, howardon is what's the first film you remember seeing? How it did?

This might not have been the first thing that I ever saw, but it's the first thing I remember seeing, which, really, I guess is the question. It was right before the return of the Jedi was coming out and I was living I was actually living in England at the time. Little town, Yeah, a little town called Felix Stowe. I don't know if you're familiar with it and have you? Yeah, yeah, I was living there and I was probably six or seven years old, and it was right before Return of the Jedi came out.

So they did a double feature of Star Wars.

And Empire Strikes Back at a at a local movie theater. And so it feels like the first thing I ever saw was back to back Star Wars movies, which feels like a big commitment. But you know, when you're six years old and you've never seen anything like that, I mean I was absolutely riveted.

Yeah. Wow, do you have do you have siblings? Were? Who were you with when you watch this?

I don't remember.

I mean I'm sure, I'm sure or I was. I don't remember who I was with. Isn't that sad?

Yeah?

But I do know that I do know that.

I almost immediately afterwards joined the Star Wars fan club.

Yeah, what do you get? What did you get as a as a fan?

I remember I got a patch that you could put on your that I could put on my jacket just said Star Wars. That's and I'm sure I got other stuff too, but that's the only thing I remember getting.

Did do you remember thinking any part of you, as in thinking, oh I want to be in this, I want to be part of this, or were you just like fucking hell? I think it was the latter. I don't think at that point.

Yeah, at that point it was there was nowhere in my brain that thought that being an actor was a real thing, or that it was even something.

That I that I wanted to do.

Yeah. Right? What about being scared? What is the film that scared you the most? Do you like it? Do you like being scared?

No? I don't. I don't.

I like scary movies and I like things that are very chilling, but I don't like the feeling. I think it takes a lot to scare me these days. I feel like I've seen it all, but I don't like it when something actually effectively troubles me and scares me. And I will say that I kind of have two

You really really messed me up, you know.

And I was like, well into my twenties at that point, but it's still just like, it really got to me that movie.

It's a fucking great idea. It's a great idea.

Yeah, it's pretty great, and it stopped me. I stopped watching horror movies for a solid twelve thirteen years after that, Like, it messed me up. So it's like I was like, I don't want to watch horror movie. I don't want to feel that way anymore, So I just stopped.

Do you remember what was your return about that in the horror movie that you watched?

Oh, that's a good question.

I got you back? I don't remember. I don't remember. I don't remember what got me back. I like it when horror movies are are fun. When they're genuinely, genuinely disturbing and scary, that's tough.

You know.

There's instances where movies have been genuinely scary, but they're just such great films that that makes up for it. In a way, like, you know, like The Exorcist, which I consider to be just a brilliant film outside of the fact that it's a horror film.

It's just I just love it.

And you know, like Hereditary was just just an incredible, incredible film but really really disturbing and scared.

It's awful.

What about crying? What's the film that made you cry? Do you cry? Are you a crier? I am?

I'm a total I'm actually a total softy that doesn't take that much to make me cry, And yet I have a really hard time thinking of movies that made me cry the most.

I do have this very.

Specific memory, though, of being in I don't know, it was like fifth or sixth grade, and it was the first time I'd ever been on like a date, and it's been by date. I mean, there was a girl that I liked, and we went to the movies together, and I think we went with another some other friends and our parents dropped us off at.

The movies and we went and saw the movie.

Please give me what's what's fifth and sixth grade? How old are you? And that place? Okay?

Yeah, I would have been eleven or twelve?

Yeah, okay, all right, yeah, and we went and saw the movie Beaches in theaters.

Yeah, and I remember.

This one stands out to me just because like I couldn't a movie was so sad and I could not stop myself from crying. It was one of those situations where I would have normally wanted to stop myself from crying because I was with a girl, and I think some of my buddies were there, and I was just like stop crying, Like I'm just I couldn't stop crying because it was just so sad.

It really got me in that movie.

Yeah, I mean, that's a nightmare. It can't take a date to Beaches. That is a film you watch on your own in the basement. Yeah, get it all out and then you return to the world.

I know, as I recall, I think she was crying too, so I think I sort of made it through that.

I don't remember what the end result was of that happening to me.

But did you kiss on this date after crying?

No?

I wasn't ready for that yet. I was a late bloomer. I wasn't ready for all that stuff yet. It's isn't it sad?

Though?

That I think so many of us as men, as little boys were told not to cry and that it was embarrassing to cry. Yeah, I think we got to get rid of that shit. I think we got to be able to cry. I think we'd men. I think we do.

And I also was like I always think I wonder where it came from, because it didn't come from my dad, you know what I mean. I think about that. It wasn't my dad wasn't telling me don't cry, you big no. But it must have been the coach. Well, I definitely thought your.

Yeah, I think it was. I think it was something it was more. Yeah, because my dad it was the same way.

He didn't.

He wasn't telling me not to cry, and nobody in my family was. But it was one of those things where I think, you cry enough times at school and some kid makes fun of you for crying at school, you know.

I think that's where I got the message.

It was.

It was from other kids who had gotten the message.

From their parents that you're not supposed to cry, and then they passed it on by you know, making fun of you for crying.

Or I think that's what happened to me.

Interested Yeah, with your kids, are you like cry cry?

We certainly don't discourage it.

I mean they're at an age now where, you know, I don't think they're quite at that place where they're trying to stop themselves from crying. Maybe my oldest is my eleven year old, he's a little more self conscious.

But yeah, no, they're they're pretty good.

About expressing their feelings, and we definitely try to be the kind of parents that allow space for them that kind of thing.

Yeah, it's it's challenging. It's challenging.

God, bet tell me this, what is the film that you love? Critics don't like it, most people don't like it. You love it unconsistently.

This, you know, I'm sure that there is a better answer to this, but it was the only only thing I could think of, which is The Exorcist three.

That's a great answer.

Do you have you seen that movie?

Answer? That's the one in the Insane As Island.

Yes, yes, it's got George C. Scott and Brad Dorief or Brad Dorif. I'm not sure how you pronounce his name, but as that recall, yet, it got sort of pretty ignored and and I wouldn't say it was like panned by critics, but it was just kind of like seeing as like it's not as good as the original, right, and just kind of brushed off. And I know that The Exorcist two was was widely considered to be a pretty terrible movie.

I actually never saw it.

Yeah, but because The Actressist three was actually direct written and directed by William Peter Blade, who wrote the original novel, and it was it was the true sequel to The Exorcist, I was interested in seeing it as a kid, and I remember that movie scared shit out of me. Yeah, and it's a really I think it's a beautifully shot film, and the performances are phenomenal.

Brad Dorif is like incredible.

He's amazing. Yeah, he's always good. He's a really good Yeah.

I've never understood why.

Yeah, it's just that movie really stands out to me as being one of those movies that I never understood why it didn't get more attention. But for the people who have seen it, everybody remembers some of the scariest moments.

From that movie.

And I don't know if you remember some of those moments, but there's a moment where.

Like one of the great jump scars in it, right.

Yeah, one of the best, one of the best if not the best I've ever ever ever seen. Do we want to give this away or do we want people to just watch the movie? But I'll put it this way. I'll set it up. There's a scene and it's in the middle the night, and it's just a camera is

And it does and it totally holds up.

Excellent, excellent answer. What about a film that you saw that you loved, you used to love it, but you've watched it recently and you've got I don't know this anymore.

Well, to be fair, I saw it again recently. I saw this movie again recently, but I knew going in. I was like, I know this is not going to be a good movie. I know it isn't because even my memories of it as a kid, I was like, even though I'm remembering it fondly and remembering how much I loved this movie. I was like, this, I just know that this movie is going to be really bad. But it was a super Girl Oh yeah, is it? Yeah, which I think came out in the early eighties.

Yeah. Yeah, I haven't seen it since I was little, and I can imagine there's probably some issues.

Yeah, it's real bad on almost every level, but very cool that in the most recent movie, The Flash, they go into this kind of multiverse type thing where he encounters different versions of different superheroes, and they used a lot of the superheroes that you've seen throughout the year, of the actors that you've seen throughout the years and age them down, so you actually see Helen Slater as Supergirl in The Flash, which I was like, that's that's awesome.

Yeah.

Yeah, So Supergirl. It has a special place in my heart because it was the very first VHS tape that we ever owned as kids. I remember we finally bought a VHS when we were living in Korea. We bought our first VHS. I was probably seven or eight years old, and my dad said, you can pick out one movie and you can buy it. And my sister and I had both seen Supergirl in theaters, and I guess we

It was like sixty bucks.

Yeah, I can believe that for.

A VHS tape in the eighties. It probably wasn't.

It was probably twenty dollars, but I seem to remember it being like sixty dollars, yeah, which is so expensive for a VHS tape, especially for that time.

And yet my dad was nice and he bought it for us.

I don't know anything about your childed, why were you in so many different countries? May I ask?

Dad was an Air Force pilot, so we Yeah, we moved around quite a bit my kids.

Yeazy, what is the film that means the most to you? Not necessarily the film itself is good, but the experience you had around seeing it always makes it special to you. Then how it's.

Well, it's got to be Jackass too, and that's good because it was the I don't know why I thought this was a good idea. Well, I sort of do, but like it was the first. I took my now wife to see that movie on our very first date ever.

She I'd met her at a party that I had had at my house.

Rob and I were living together in Venice, and she was at the house and I met her, and I could tell she had a really wicked sense of humor, and I just thought, like, that's a more fun date movie than something romantic.

I want to go see something and laugh.

So we went and got sushi and then we went to Jackass too, and I remember the amount, the degree to which she was laughing. I just remember thinking, this girl is awesome that she thinks that funny. Yeah, because that movie is it's messed up, all those Jackass movies are. And she just thought it was hilarious, and so did I, and so it was a real bonding moment for us. And I'll just never forget that first date.

Man, that's really very lovely. Is it's really it's a problem. What is the film that you both relate to?

I can't think of anything in that department, if I'm honest. Now, maybe it's because I think I've had I've just been such a I felt like as an Air Force brat, as a as somebody who moved around so much, have a pretty tenuous grasp on who it is that I am.

Even now to this day interesting.

Yeah, I think it just was changing so much as I was growing up, as I moved from different culture to different culture, that it kind of messed with my identity.

So I don't really even know who I am now. So even if I saw.

Myself on screen, I don't know that I would recognize it.

Were you like a chameleon, would you change to whatever school you were at, the type of vibe, would you just become what you thought was the right thing there?

I think so, Yeah, I think it was important to me to fit in and not be the new kid as quickly as possible. But I do think that's also where I developed a sense of humor. I think that was a way of getting people to like me was making them laugh. So I'd say that that making people laugh was always a common thread throughout all of that and acting, Yeah, and I think and I think, yeah, being an actor having to become or a feeling like I was feeling the pressure to become something or someone else.

What was the longest you were in one place have your childhood?

While my dad was still active military England. We were there for about four years in Felix Stone.

And what was the shortest if you remember.

We were in Virginia for six months. The sad thing is is I remember that was the place that I liked the most other than England, England, England and Virginia, England. I was that really destroyed me, honestly looking back on it now, there's.

Some there's there's some trauma. There's some real trauma there.

But we we left when I was I lived there from three till I was I don't know, almost about to turn eight, I think, And that was like, as far as I was concerned, that.

Was where I wanted to live for the rest of my life.

And I had such good friends there, and that was that was extremely difficult.

And Virginia I just liked. It was just beautiful. The house was beautiful that we lived in, the neighborhood was beautiful.

I liked the school and everything. It was like six months and we were out of there.

Did it make you when you were making friends and stuff. Did you have in your head, this is going to be so short, I have to make the most of It's like, did it train you I'm going to be leaving. Did you act in any way different because you knew time was short?

It took a while, but eventually yeah.

I think by the time I had moved to Alabama when I was ten, but I had sort of, I think, to get a little just a little bit like keeping people at arm's length a little bit. So it was the kind of the opposite of what you were just saying. Instead of trying to make friends as quickly as possible, there was a little bit of like, I don't want to make too close a friends because I'm just gonna end up leaving and it's just gonna hurt too much. I don't think my guard was up that much when

It's really sad.

Fascinating. Yeah, yeah, fast saying what is Well, there's no segue to this, but here we go. What's the sexiest film I've ever seen?

Yes, sexiest film? I don't know. I guess I don't. I don't know that I've ever seen a film that I considered sexy. I've seen, I know, I've seen actresses that I found sexy, But the actual film itself. I can't even think of an example of a film that would.

Make someone feel that way.

Can you?

What are some examples of films that you think are sexy?

I mean I can think of a million.

Okay, let me see if any of them I've seen and agree with you? Yeah, go ahead, Blue, You ever seen that? No, I've never even heard of that.

Okay, what about well, I mean, a basic level, basic instinct I believe is designed for you to think it's sexy in not sexy.

You know, definitely see what you mean, definitely would be considered a sexy film, not necessarily what I was ever into. So I don't think I thought of it like it wasn't sexy to me, although I recognize that it is a sexy film.

Yeah, Greace too.

Never saw it.

God never saw it. Yeah, give me the sexy films, I guess. So, yeah, so you've got zero. You've got no answer for this.

I got no answer for this, man. I Yeah, I don't.

I know, it's it's really disappointing, and I really, I really am trying to think, but I just can't. I just can't come up with anything. I mean, yeah, I don't know. It's it's weird.

So there's no there's a sub category that you're traveling. Bone is worrying. Why don't a film you found arousing? You went, sure you should. It doesn't sound like you've ever found a film arousing.

Yeah, I don't.

I guess I'm not. I'm not really seeking arousal in my films. Not that not that people who films. Yeah, that's not.

That's not something that I'm that I'm looking for.

It's not something I want as a matter of fact, I think you have a little bit of a puritanical upbringing, you know, super Christian parents. Maybe maybe I think like sex in films makes me more uncomfortable that, you know, like I don't. I don't really want to see sex in films. Again, it's very I don't have a problem with it. I just don't. It's not something I'm seeking or find sexy. Most of the time I'm watching a film with other people and I'm like.

This is like, I don't know, it's just not so you're saying I'm a disgusting pervert. Okay, I think that.

Yeah, maybe that is the implication, is that the Yeah, that's the takeaway.

What is objectively, objectively the greatest film of all time might not be your favorite, but it is the best film ever made.

I could only think of things that are films that I consider to be the greatest films of all time.

Ilo.

Now I realized that that wasn't really the assignment. The assignment was right to come to think of a film that I think is objectively So I thought of two, and am I allowed to do?

Am I allowed to bring up two films?

You can do two and I'll pick one, Okay, I'll tell you which one's correct.

Okay.

One is one is Fargo, which to me is just the perfect movie top to bottom. It's dark, it's dramatic, it's tense, it's thrilling, it's super super funny. The dialogue is incredible, the plotting is credible, the acting is incredible. It's just top to bottom perfect as far as I'm concerned. Fargo, and then the other movie, just because it was so groundbreaking and so mind blowing to so many people, including.

Myself, was two thousand and one of Space.

Honestly, that movie shook me, really really shook me the first time I saw it, and then continued to shake me as subsequent times. Anytime I ever saw a theater that was playing it, I would go see it. Because you're seeing it in a theater is just obviously that's where you want to see that movie.

You don't want to see it on a small screen.

It's just when you talk about, like objectively, the greatest movie of all time that's got to be up.

There, that is that that's the correct time. Yeah, I love Fargo, but two thousand and one is the answer to that question. Correct? Well, okay, okay, all right, what is the film that you could or have what's the most over and over again.

This is probably not a movie that I have. I mean, I have seen it multiple times. And sometimes I do this with movies where if it's a movie that I love so much that I like, I almost don't want to watch it too many times because I love it so much. I want there to be a lot of time between the last time I watched it and the next time I watch it, so I can be as excited as I possibly can be to see it again.

But Tombstone a great I just love that movie. I love it.

It's so it's so fun, it's so fun, and it's it's exciting. It just it's got some of the greatest performances. It's such an incredible ensemble cast. I'm admittedly drawn to sort of little kind of testosterone movies, I have to admit, you know, for I think just because I'm a dude. I don't know, maybe I just I kind of like movies where like dudes are dude in it out, you know, a little bit.

But I just love Tombstone. Man, I love it. I love it. I could watch it. I don't think I'd ever get tired of that movie.

So, you know what is interesting Tombstone. A lot of not a lot of people, but more than three have answered Tombstone for most watched over and over again, like really is it it? Really? Yeah? It really? It stuck with people like I love it. It's great that it's not a massive film. I mean, it wasn't massive, you know what I mean, Like, no, I think it was successful, but it is. And yet it's come up here three or four times.

Oh, you've got You've got some people on this podcast that have very good taste in movies. But you know, interestingly, I don't even I'm not even a fan of the of Westerns as a genre. I don't know that I can even think of another Western that I enjoyed on any level. I'm sure there's there must be one, but I don't know. I'm just I just am not into westerns. And yet that movie is one of my favorite all time movies.

Right now. On the other end of the scale, what's the worst, what's the worst film you've ever seen?

Well, the obvious answer would I think for most people probably be Tommy Wiseo's The Room. I'm not gonna say that, though, because that is one of those movies that hits the sweet spot of so bad it's so good. So in some ways I actually consider that movie to be really, really good because it's super.

Entertaining, super entertaining. However, there is a filmmaker.

I don't know if you're familiar with this guy or if he's come up in these conversations before, but there's a filmmaker named Neil Breen.

He hasn't come up and I haven't seen his films, but I have seen the trailers for his films, and I'm aware.

Of you're aware of his existence.

Okay, we'll do yourself a favor and see if you can get through even forty five.

Minutes of one of his movies.

And I recommend starting with his I think what was maybe his first movie. It was called Double Down, and he's got a few more of the he's made, like I Am Here Now and Fateful Findings. Buddy, there is no worse full length feature film on the planet than everything that Neil Breen has ever made.

It's extraordinary.

I mean, it is extraordinary and on some level, I guess, kind of fun, but mostly just so fucking boring that I challenge anybody that will sit through the entire thing. Now, we've watched almost all, if not all, of the three movies that I named, with a group of friends of mine and I that love to watch terrible movies together just because we enjoy that and like making jokes and having a laugh. That's where I've seen Neil Breen's movies. But yeah, really, really really bad?

Is he Okay?

Definitely not because I think he thinks he's making unbelievably good movies. He clearly has a savior complex as a as a human being. He is always the hero of his He acts in his own movies too, He directs them, rights them and stars in them, and he is always the hero.

And he does not.

He just ain't. God bless them. Yeah, well, is queuing comedy? You're very funny as much as you want to do drama, you're also very funny. What's the film that made you laugh the nice.

There's a there's a few.

There's a few, for sure, But I really I was like, Okay, if I had to boil this down to what is the movie that made me laugh the hardest ever. Really, there's two of them and it's kind of a toss up, but I'm gonna go with I'm gonna go with Borat. Yes, I think I might have broken my theater seat. I was laughing so hard, like I was. I was enjoying that movie so much that I was I think I was bouncing on this seat like a little child with ADHD, you know, a hyperactive child. It was so so so

And what was your second op? Sit?

Close second would be the South Park movie for sure, fucking love. It's just another movie where where I was laughing so hard I was almost falling on the ground in the theater.

Yeah, yeah, I know. I'm amazing musical. Yeah, yeah, it's fucking banging. Yeah.

Those guys are amazing. Yeah, amazing.

Love it now, Ben Hallerton, you have been an absolute delight. I'm very grateful for your time and I've really enjoyed this. However, when you were researching how can I become Spider Man, something you've been thinking about for years, and you figured out the radioactive spiders being tested upon in a lab, but first you had to work out how to break into that lab, and you spent six months googling, working out the intricate plans how do you get in this place?

Is this one of those weird afterlife things where you actually know because I didn't tell you that part?

I know? Okay, God, seeing your death flash before your eyes. You handled this radio spider and what was sweet about it? Didn't want about you, and you kept being fite minutes crawling over you and you went to bite me, and then you hit it. And that was your mistake because you hit the spider and the spider bit you out of anger. So when when it bit you, it didn't bite you with love. It bit you with rage. So first three to four days great fun, sure, climbing walls,

Do.

Your wife's like, listen, I can't live in a street without any other people in the street. You can't just eat them all. And you go, I'm sorry, I don't know. This is probably mindful. I don't really know what's happened, but I should probably have my off in and she says, well, maybe take yourself back to the lab and hand yourself into scientists. And you said, no, no, the police are good. I should hand myself into the police. And she goes, I don't know, okay, and you say bye, I see

Now? Well, first of all, I'm absolutely astonished at the revelation that the reason it all went bad it was because because I forced the spider to bite me out of anger.

That was that was the that was the thing. So you man, that sucks, dude.

So basically, like, if I had just figured out a way to cajole it into biting me out of love or excitement or anything other than to.

Trust you, the spider didn't feel safe.

Yeah, well that's fair, then, I think that's that's that's fair.

That's fair. It's just it's not great. It's not great.

But if I had to yeah, if I had to take one DVD, maybe The Big Lebowski excellent. I mean, I I'm worried that too many people have said that, maybe on the show, but.

I don't think anyone's taking that.

No one's taking The Big Lebowski. That's crazy.

I'm sure it's come up, but I don't know if anyone took it.

That's just so fun.

That's another movie I could just watch over and over again, never get sick of it.

There you go, they're gonna have a lovely time with you. Glenn, is there anything you would like to tell people to look out for in the coming months that you are in or doing or have On the guy.

We're doing a couple of live Always Sunny podcast shows in Philadelphia and New York. By the time this goes out, they may have sold out by then, but maybe they haven't.

And if they haven't, then you should go check it out.

Go to the Always sunnypod dot com and get your live tickets to our live show. They're a lot of fun, and then just the podcast. Other than that, you know, we're on strike, so we can't we can't do anything.

Nothing we can do, you know.

So we just got to talk to each other about all the wonderful movies we wish we'd been in and hope that one of these days we can be in another one.

Well, I don't know when it comes out or anyway, if you haven't seen BlackBerry, you should see BlackBerry. I'm telling the audience it's oh really really good.

Of course, that's what I should be promoting more than anything is. Yeah, BlackBerry is available on vide on demand now you can, you can rent it. I'm very, very proud of that movie, So thank you for shouting that out.

It's really good. You know what else, it does a really smart with no spoilers. There's a kind of simple thing that it sets up for a complicated business, you know. It distills an idea into a very simple thing that is really like, it's such good storytelling. It's just such good storytelling in the way that that pays off this small thing. Brilliant truly.

Yeah, it was even in script Forum it was. It was absolutely incredible. I feel so I'm so grateful that I was able to do that movie.

And it's such a pleasure talking to you, man. I really enjoy your work.

Oh man, I loved it. Thank you. That's very kind of you. Yeah, A big fan of yours.

Yeah, it's really it's really cool seeing you in personally, talking to the real you. You're such a lovely guy, not bristly at all. Shut up, it's lovely to see you. I have a lovely death. All right, Good day to you. So that was episode two hundred and sixty eight. Head over to the patreon at Patreon dot com Forward slash pret Goldstein for the extra twenty five minutes of chat, secrets and video with Glenn. Head over to the patreon at Patreon dot com forward slash preck Goldsten for the

My neighbor Marien loves it. She always cries there and she all really appreciate We both really appreciate it. Thank you so much to Glenn for doing the show and for being so great giving me his time. Thanks to Screwby's PIP and the Distraction Pieces Network. Thanks to Buddy Peace for producing it. Thanks to iHeartMedia and Will Ferrell's Big Money Players NETW hosting it. Thanks to Adam Richardson for the graphics, at least a loaded for the photography. So that as if for now, I hope you are