Bonus: In Conversation with Alicia Keys, Pt. 2

And I think everyone can relate to this if we get quiet enough to actually pay it tension to that still inner voice, which you know, Look, you and I are having this conversation at a time where there's these reckonings upon reckonings going on all over the globe and people are in a way have been forced to become more introspective, whether we like it or not, and to face ourselves and to be in this slowed down state that we didn't choose. It's not like we all decided

to go off on a retreat. It's like it it came to us. And you talk about this resounding yes and it's also kind of in the context of getting quiet enough to hear it, giving yourself the space and the time, something that you've been super deliberate about doing. I think it seems for a long time of implementing that space of quiet in your life. Can you talk

a little bit about that. Oh my goodness, the resounding yes moment was definitely a huge, huge, huge turning point to me for me and um when I when I went to you know, when I went to sit down with Oprah and speak with her, I was talking about there is a big transition happening in my life. Again.

It was right on the heels of what I just described to this album called Here, where I was really starting to recognize who I did not want to be anymore, and I was starting to let go of a lot of relationships, business relationships, the personal relationships that I had used to define me or to as used as crutches. Thinking that I could not, um do what I was doing without these people, that these people kind of made me who I was or who I am or whatever.

I kind of decided that or they helped me decide because they benefited them for sure, whatever the case was, And I just didn't know what to do because I had this feeling that I just couldn't find the right partnership. I couldn't find the right people to to help me go to the next place and to continue on my journey in a way that was even more meaningful and

and and more powerful. And and so I would I just I I finally she invited me to something special, and I thought, oh, how great would this be to just ask her advice about this? Because that's another thing I think we probably don't do enough. I definitely don't often where more now I'm getting better now where to reach out to people that may everybody can't reach out to Oprah. I'm not trying to say that that we

all end. I'm surprised that I can't trust me, um, but the but there are people in our lives that have great experiences, and a lot of the time we won't reach out to them because we don't want to bother them. I looked at probably so busy, or look, they're already dealing with all of this, man, they probably how would they know? Or we feel embarrassed that we

don't know, or whatever the case. And I think for a lot of years that maybe didn't utilize my mentorship or the people who could give me great advice the way to the highest capacity because I didn't want to be intrusive, or I didn't want to seem like I didn't know, or a lot of my life I spent pretending I knew more than I actually did, which we

probably all find ourselves in one way or another. So, you know, finally when I had the courage to kind of speak out this this this mentor who I knew would have some thoughts about it, it really was a powerful awakening because she was able to share how she herself found herself in a position of of looking to other people to always kind of come up with the big ideas or assuming they would know better than her, and until she finally realized that, you know, nobody knows

you more than you, just they just can't. They just don't live with you, they're not close to you, they don't know your heart like that. They don't even have access to those places that you have access to, So nobody knows you better than you and I and I didn't really see it like that for so long, and I always gave so much more credit to everybody else, which was a part of that hiding thing that I spoke about started to happen in the beginning, and a part of this, uh you know, idea of maybe not

accepting the greatness that's within us. I think we do that a lot, especially as women. You know, we're very powerful beings. And I think that makes that scary to the world. It's scary to ourselves, you know, to be so you know, creative. I mean, by the nature of us, we create, and so to to create anything out of any circumstance, out of nothing is it's scary. And and to embrace that's terrifying. And I also feel like that sometimes. So when she shared that with me and and really understanding,

right how who could know better than me? Nobody could know better than me? And to start to develop that trust with yourself and a confidence in yourself almost the beginning. But I still it's sound. I got it in theory, but I still can't figure out how to like really make it make sense. How do you actually make that makes sense and do that in a tactic, tactful way.

And and and it wasn't until she said, because you know what a resounding yes feels like, And I was like, oh, actually, I do know what a resounding is still, Like, I know when a thing is like I'm so excited to do a thing or to go to a thing or to talk to a person or whatever, and it's like so strong, and I'm like, uh huh, I'm doing that for sure without a doubt. And then I know the one that's like I think I should do it because it's the right thing, that right. Isn't that going to

make this happen? Whatever we do that convinces us to do this. I know what that feels like too, And that's not a resounding. It So when she said you know what it resounding, it feels like I finally got it. The resounding yes is something that that is actually applicable. You know. It's like it's like a tool in your toolbox that you can come back to again and again, like, Oh, that's what that feels like. I know what that feels like.

And then conversely, that means I know what it feels like when it's not the case yes, And so I know when it's right for me because if a resounding yet opposed to this deliberation that we all do, is it right? Is it not right? Is it right? Is it not right. You know right away that they resounding yes.

So that started to give me some clarity about how I could start to make some decisions and some difficult decisions, and and to be more in control of my compass, you know where it was leading me, as opposed to feeling so obligated to ask if anybody else or too, you know, ask people with more experience, figuring that they knew better, but they don't know better than you. You know the best for you. You're the best student of yourself. M M. I love that We'll be back in a

moment with more family secrets. There's just a couple more things I'd love to talk to you about. And um, you go on after your your two kids, your two boys are born, and you are convinced. I think it's about your friend Erica, who's such a great friend. Um, to go on a meditation retreat and you know, like any mom in that situation, I've been there myself. It's like do I go? Do I not go? I can't go. They're not going to survive without me. What will they eat?

You know, how how can they possibly? How can I go do this thing? But you go and you and you do you take the time and the space for yourself, and it's a Cundalini yoga retreat, and it's like you you find a spiritual practice that really really speaks to

you and resonates with you. Um, and then you talk about the way that that creates quiet for you, and you know, to connect the whole idea of that kind of quiet too, when you can really hear the resounding yes, or when you can really hear your deepest inner wisdom yes, Oh my goodness. And I was so I truly I was so disconnected to my own intuition so many ways, and I never even thought of taking the time to pour into myself or to even you know, dedicate X amount of minutes a day to do that. I just

didn't know what that was. I hadn't had been exposed to meditation before in a few different ways and breathing and things like that, but I just didn't I just didn't know exactly what to do with it or how to make it part of my life style. And my friend Erica, you know, she really did challenge me because she told me about this retreat and she said, and I'm making every excuse and the baby and I can't

be away. And at the time, I was like, right around my husbin's birthday, I think I would have had to come home right at the you know, right on the day of his birthday, all these things that I was using as excuses. And she asked me, when was the last time you did anything for yourself? And I I couldn't really answer her, and that, of course kind of pushed me two, you know, pushed me to say

I have to do it, and so would. It introduced me to really open me up to another logical and an applicable way of connecting with spirit, of connecting with my own internal compass and with my intuition, and just the silence that I think it takes to start to hear yourself, which you know I didn't do well before. I didn't. I filled up every minute, I answered every request.

I tried to show up for every single person and things, and and I never had I never knew how to take that time to be silent and quiet with myself for myself. And it really changed everything. And it did help me to identify more clearly the resounding yeses and and a nose and even the ones that were like I, like maybes I was like, Okay, it was not a yes, I still a no. And that's that's it. It's really it's really been powerful and a challenge to always keep

up um, but something that I really believe in. Yeah, it's it's making me think too, Like just circling back to the beginning of our conversation about the the way that these lessons, over the course of a life continue to return and return to us um maybe always, maybe forever, or maybe until we learn them. But even when we

learn them, we're still learning them anew. And you know, towards the very end of of your your book, there's this really beautiful passage and I won't read the whole thing, but I'll just read the very beginning, which is the path to self discovery is not a straight line. It's a zig zag. We move in and out of awareness. One step forwards, three steps to the left, a baby step back, another leap forward. A lightbulb moment might shine

brightly one day but then flicker the next. It takes work to hold tightly to a certain consciousness to live in its wisdom every day. I have to intentionally maintain an awareness of my value. I know I'm worthy, but you don't cross over into the land of self worth and just become a permanent resident. You have to keep your passport current. I love that, I mean, And that's what you're that's what you're describing there, with the meditation,

with the that deliberate you know, listening for the resounding. Yes, it's like renewing. We all need to renew our passports every day. Otherwise they really do just kind of sit there in the drawer and we don't we don't learn, and we don't grow. Yeah, oh my god, so much.

And it's just natural because you know, these things come to us in so many different ways and from so many different spaces, and and and and they're meant to elevate us, and we we want to be elevated, and we're ready to be elevated, and and and but it's tricky, and definitely it's surely you have to keep reminding yourself, and you have to keep telling yourself that you know. So sometimes when I feel a little bit, a little bit, you know, something's not going quite right, or maybe my

confidence is a little shaken over a particular this or that. Um, there are times that I will literally say to myself, you deserve this. You deserve this, You deserve this, you deserve and I'll say it a billion times just to

remind myself that I deserve it. And you know, and that's just naturally go through these places and have these feelings where we're uncertain or it's a new place and we don't know what to do in that place, or you know, we're more comfortable in these other spaces because we've been there before, and and and so this reminder and this kind of constant reaching towards your higher you. You know, um, you don't have to feel guilty about it. And I think for a long time, I felt pretty

guilty about being great. I felt pretty guilty about, um, you know, having opportunities that the people around me. I I didn't see them having those same opportunities. And and I wanted us all to have the same opportunities at the same time and reach all of our dreams at the same time. And and you know, everybody has their own journey, and you don't have to feel guilty about yours. Um.

In fact, yours will likely inspire the next person. You know, if you can just own it and own your your wonder and your magnificence and your light and your connection to you know, what your purpose is. So so I agree this. You do have to keep kind of renewing

that passport. You have to keep in minding, and so you do have to make sure those lessons you learned, you didn't um, just learn it for that moment and forget it, which I keep myself all the time, and I find myself doing that, you know, then remember it again and keep on going. So I think there's I think there's really high heights to reach that we haven't even realized yet. And I'm really excited it and I'm looking forward to continuing to reach down. We'll be right back.

I have one last question for you. UM. Yeah, as we're speaking, you know, during this time of reckoning. On top of reckoning, you just released the single Perfect Way to Die, which is chilling and magnificent. UM. I mean chilling, like chills up and down my body listening to it. I'm sure I'm far from alone, UM, And I'm just wondering, as an artist, how do you respond in the moment to the moment. I think it's something that artists so often struggle with when we're in um, you know, a

steam in history or you know, we're really living through something, right, Um? Yeah, how do I respond to it? Or how do I choose to respond to it? I mean, I know this is a song that you had written and hadn't released yet, and in this moment it felt like time And that makes so much sense. Why hadn't you released it before? You know? And and what's the feeling creatively? You know, I'm asking asking for a friend. Um, you know, what's the feeling of being someone who makes art out of

life during a time when life is trembling? Mm hmm, wow, man, I mean, we are all definitely in a new space in so many ways. I mean, in so many ways. We're in a really really repetitive space too that we have witnessed, or some more than others witnessed over and

over again, time and time again. And the reason why I call it a new space is because we, I feel find are finding ourselves face to face with um, the truth in a way that I don't know if we've ever all had to look so glaringly and so obviously and so clearly, and so it's just right in

front of us. Um, how much we are experiencing as the collective and how much we are awakening as the collective, and how much we're recognizing the inequality and the unfairness that surrounds us, and how much we are all outraged and invigorated too really learn more about it, speak up more about it, be a part of the change of it, the current of change, and and and figure out how do we do that, How do we do that with our kids? How are we doing that with each other?

How are we having reversations with our families? How are we you know, how are we going out into the world and and and expressing, you know, our intolerance with hate and and racism and and this inequity overall. And and so we're all in this new space to your point of reckoning upon reckoning, I love how you've been

saying that. And we're just in this new space of self reflection and uncovering and recognition and eye opening and and it's it's uncomfortable, and it's scary, and it's crazy, and and you so many of us just wish that we could, you know, just erase all of the the evils and the and the things that have been prevalent, you know, in this country and in the world since the beginning. Um but I think that there is also this feeling of unity, and there's also this feeling of

having the hard conversation. It's the difficult conversations, and that's great films of you know, of course, there's always going to be every side, but I think we and for me as an artist, I will truly, truly try and want to focus on the part that can uplift us, the part that can bring us to to a similar space, to an equal ground, and to to touch us on a level that is just visceral, because I think that's that,

to your point, that is the beauty of art. That's why I'm so honored to be an artist that that can speak to the moment, to the time, to the emotion, to the feeling um because that's that's the part that erases all the language barriers and all the different things that try to make us feel separate from each other and and and somehow we are all in one place at one time with one feeling and and our eyes

are open. So I wrote this song Perfect Way to Die, almost two years ago, and it was it was written based off of what was happening with Mike Brown and to mea rights and Trademon Martin and Sandra Blend and so many other you know, just horrible murders of black people. And I I knew that it would have its time to come, and of course it could have been right then, but it just felt like there was I was going

to hold onto it to find the right moment. And I actually thought, after this project, Alicia have another project that I'm sinalizing as well musically, and I thought it would be on that one. But when I, you know, realized and looked around and just as we all are seeing everything and being a part of it and recognizing it, it's just it was the words of everything we're feeling right right right now, and and I was, I was in awe and shocked that it almost felt like these

songs were written a while ago. Um, the last three songs I've put out, I feel like they've been written a while ago, but meant for this time. And and so I just actually have been and also in a state of just following, following and listening the listening of it and and going with with that. UM, and I think we're all in a place of deep listening. And I and I really do believe that we're in a place as deep awakening. Um, there's a you know, and

I think we're all discovering. So there's so much to fight for, and there's so much that we have to stand up for and stand up for each other for, and and it's never going to change we don't all recognize it and stand up for each other. So I believe that we can see that happening. And I feel

like we're on the precipice of great change. And and I know him an optimist, and I never want to not be an optimist because we have to be and and not only do we have to think it and dream it and believe it, but we have to act on it and not ignore it and be present. And I believe we're doing it. M omen. Yeah, really, what a privilege and a gift to have this conversation with you. I really have just loved talking with you, and I'm

so excited to share it with so many people. Me to have been really looking forward to this one, And I really am so grateful for you too, and thank you for taking the time to get into it and sharing your perspective of it and bringing me into your universe as well. And I'm really, really really blessed by this conversation, so I can't wait to talk to you again. Thanks me to Alicia, be well, Danny, you to take

care all right m HM. For more podcasts for My Heart Radio, visit the I Heart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.