The year is 2029. The world is a horrible place where those who are different are deemed a threat. Those with special or otherwise exceptional talents, skills and abilities are segregated out from the rest of society. Shunned. In some cases, destroyed. Hunted. Fortunately this precludes Steve Norman, Owen Hughes, Andrew Brooker and Tony Black, who are allowed to just carry on as normal producing episodes of the Failed Critics Film Podcast for your delectation. Just in time for us to review the l...
Mar 09, 2017•1 hr 9 min
Welcome to the thirteenth episode of Character Unlock, unlucky for some. With little going on in the world of video games at the moment, hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker have opted to spend just over an hour chatting about stuff that is about to happen with the imminent release of the Nintendo Switch and the recently announced Xbox Game Pass, an Access style rental service for Microsoft's console, before digging into an extended What We've Been Playing. Having definitely found his comfort zo...
Mar 03, 2017•1 hr 18 min
Hosts Steve Norman and Owen Hughes and special guests Paul Field and Andrew Brooker indulge in a bit of back-slapping over the Oscars in this week's episode. If you look directly underneath your seat, every listener to the podcast will find a spectacular, one-of-a-kind goody-bag filled with luxury items, such as one of 20 possible variations of a DVD with "Hooligan" in the title, a plastic receptacle measuring approximately 10 cubic centimetres, a mini-statuette of Dave Courtney with no trousers...
Mar 02, 2017•1 hr 28 min
Firstly, apologies for the admittedly rubbish hatchet job on the editing this week. Long story short, after spending ages editing out the ums, pauses, yeahs, anyways, clicks, clacks, mic noises, talking over each other and insufferably bad jokes (maybe not so many of the latter), the project crashed. So much for recovery files. That just leaves a very (very) rushed edit - on the plus side, you get to hear for the first time in years just how an unedited Failed Critics podcast sounds!Secondly, at...
Feb 22, 2017•1 hr 32 min
It's Valentine's Day! OK, it was Valentine's day when we recorded... What better way to spend your time than with the consoles that you love so much and the games that make you feel good about yourself? How about spending a couple of hours talking about those things with your mates? Welcome to this week's Character Unlock podcast. Fresh off the back of the last jam packed episode, hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker spend a bit of time digging into the news from the last week or so. From Call o...
Feb 17, 2017•1 hr 29 min
After quite literally years of podcasting, and uncountable hours of work going into it – the Failed Critics Film Podcast has reached its 250th episode! We know it’s just three or four blokes who have gotten to know each other quite well over the past five years, talking about films, but we’re pretty proud of it and hope that you enjoy listening to our little show as much as we've enjoyed reaching this milestone. If you think we show any promise at all, please subscribe and spread the word. Yes, ...
Feb 14, 2017•1 hr 17 min
Welcome to this week's episode of the Failed Critics Podcast as sister and brother merge in a horrific act of audio incest. By which I mean that (our sister gaming podcast) Character Unlock's hosts Andrew Brooker and John Miller join Steve Norman and Owen Hughes to review video game adaptation franchise series movie thing Resident Evil: The Final Chapter. Naturally the chat descends into a general conversation about the games as well (although you really should listen to the latest Character Unl...
Feb 10, 2017•1 hr 6 min
Ow yow doin', ar kid? Y'am oroight, ay ya? Bostin'! This bonus triple bill episode has the dubious honour of being our first ever podcast recorded live in person without the aid of Skype. Owen Hughes, Tony Black and Andrew Brooker went all the way to a pub in Birmingham to record 70 minutes worth of bonus content just for the Hell of it. Alcohol was consumed and a quiet corner in a lovely little boozer was found. The fact that the Six Nations then kicked off and the Failed Critics were soon surr...
Feb 10, 2017•1 hr 12 min
And so, as the first month of 2017 comes to a close, the first big video game of the year to make waves has finally arrived. But unlike Resident Evil VII's intrepid hero, Character Unlock is bringing back-up. Poached him from his regular seats on both Failed Critics and the Retro Gaming Discussion Show, hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker enlist the help of Matt Lambourne in their exploration of the Baker Family House. The gaming trio also wade through the swampy undergrowth of the last week's ...
Feb 03, 2017•1 hr 46 min
Welcome to this week's podcast as we hold the metaphorical tourniquet and inject you with our audio-skag. No c**t listens to this till we find out what c**t made it. (That would be Steve Norman, Owen Hughes, Paul Field and Matt Lambourne.) This week's main review is T2: Trainspotting; Danny Boyle's eagerly awaited (loose) adaptation of Irvine Welsh's sequel to his classic 1996 movie, starring Ewan McGregor, Ewen Bremner, Jonny Lee Miller and Robert Carlyle. Before all of that is this week's quiz...
Jan 31, 2017•1 hr 29 min
Well it seems we were a little hasty this week in recording the podcast. If only we'd have waited another 12 hours, we could have discussed the actual nominations for the Academy Awards and not just speculated. Although it doesn't seem to matter as we were broadly correct in our predictions and round-up our thoughts in a brief news section to open the show proper (after Steve Norman hosts the long-delayed quiz finale between Owen Hughes and Callum Petch). Speaking of delays - apologies to those ...
Jan 26, 2017•1 hr 27 min
It's business as usual this week as Character Unlock forgets the specials... Forgets the films... And forgets to do any form of planning. In the latest episode of the video game-centric podcast, hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker thank their lucky stars that the big conference detailing Nintendo's latest console, the Switch, happened because otherwise they would have nothing to talk about. Shambolic as ever, the lads pick apart Nintendo's new machine, the games that are/aren't coming with it a...
Jan 20, 2017•1 hr 32 min
Bad episode titles, published at 3am, and two miserly gits moaning about the world? It can only be the return of Failed Critics Podcast in 2017! Hosts Steve Norman and Owen Hughes are on their Todd for the first podcast of the new year to talk about Scorsese's latest drama, Silence, as well as supernatural hocus pocus shenanigans in The Invitation. The pair also end up chatting about the iconic Steven Spielberg after Steve's first ever watch of The Color Purple - and perhaps more surprisingly, O...
Jan 11, 2017•1 hr 5 min
So begins 2017, the year that will almost certainly end with our hosts ruining the podcast completely because they refuse to stop talking about their big games once they come out. Wondering how much time the lads can actually spend talking about Mass Effect and Horizon: Zero Dawn? Stick with us this year and find out. But back to the present; with the Failed Critics guys having a well deserved week off (have you heard their stuff from the back end of the year? We're surprised Owen is still stand...
Jan 06, 2017•2 hr 12 min
Fanfare, please! It's the final part of our Failed Critics Awards 2016 podcast. We've got the full list of all the films to make it onto our top 10 of the year, as voted for by you folks. Also in part 2, Steve Norman, Owen Hughes, Andrew Brooker and Callum Petch reveal which have been the best performances of 2016 from both male and female actors. Spoiler: Mob Handed star, Yvette Rowland, didn't make the shortlist - but did Mob Handed make it onto our worst 3 films of the year? Or even our top 1...
Dec 31, 2016•1 hr 9 min
Welcome to the first part of this year's Failed Critics Awards! Rather than force you to sit through a two-hour podcast only days after our three-hour compilation episode came out, we've split this year's awards in half. In part one, hosts Steve Norman and Owen Hughes are joined by Andrew Brooker and Callum Petch to scowl, whoop and whine about the winners in: Best documentary; Best British film; Best film not in the English language; Best soundtrack. As well, of course, as our end of year quiz!...
Dec 30, 2016•1 hr 5 min
It's just gone midnight on Christmas Eve, which means those of you who have managed stay up past your bedtime and wait for Father Christmas can officially open one of your presents early! I've got the perfect one for you, right here... This brand new episode is a three and a half hour long 'best of' the Failed Critics Podcast from the past 12 months, all cobbled together into some kind of Christmas TV type compilation episode. There's all of our favourite bits, including Paul's famous quizzes, r...
Dec 25, 2016•3 hr 29 min
As the year draws to a close and everyone takes this opportunity to breathe a sigh of relief that the seemingly unending misery of the year of our Lord 2016 is finally over, it seems that we've actually had a pretty decent year for gaming. To celebrate, join hosts Andrew Brooker and John Miller as they rattle down their best games of the year; and scrape the barrel to name a couple of rubbish ones. The lads drag out some games that they've talked about before on previous episodes, refusing to st...
Dec 23, 2016•1 hr 51 min
Once upon a time in a galaxy far, far away... a bunch of humanoids (that rather suspiciously looked a lot like regular homo-sapiens) hatched a plan to steal some prized blueprints that will allow these feisty rebels to finally topple their evil authoritarian overlord once and for all. Unfortunately for them, the best they could manage was to kick this wretched git off their podcast for a week instead, as Steve Norman, Paul Field and "Crisp Packet" Dave Valentine return for another Star Wars spec...
Dec 17, 2016•57 min
We left some mince pies and a nip of sherry out in the nip of sherry in a vain attempt to attract someone jolly onto the Christmas special podcast this year but instead we ended up with Steve Norman, Owen Hughes, Brian Plank and Tony Black. Festive frivolities ensue on our very merry podcast with a Christmas-themed quiz to kick things off before a plug for our Failed Critics Awards 2016 (which you can vote for here before 27 December: https://failedcritics.com/2016/12/12/failed-critics-awards-vo...
Dec 14, 2016•1 hr 17 min
As the year heads towards its end, it can only mean one thing: The annual splurge of awards shows and self-congratulatory press conferences continue and are going strong. In this last week, we've had the latest Geoff Keighley wank-a-thon award show. Whilst hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker are skipping out on the awards, "who won what" and "what missed out", it is one of the best places outside of the gaming conventions to get an announcement or two and a few new trailers. This is where the l...
Dec 08, 2016•1 hr 34 min
No sooner have hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker dusted themselves off from their mammoth Call of Duty special than they return for the third week in a row with a new episode. As Christmas approaches and everyone starts to do their "Best of 2016" lists - ours will be here in a few weeks - it must mean that the first game awards show of the season is upon us. As much as Brooker protests that he hates game awards, the pair manage to fumble their way through some of the more prominent awards fro...
Nov 25, 2016•1 hr 38 min
The team have all got their wands out and they're not afraid to [---DM unsolicited pictures of them---] show them in the latest triple bill episode of the Failed Critics podcast in honour of Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them, starring Meddie Redbayne as Newt Scaramanger. Hosts Steve Norman, Owen Hughes and Tony Black pick three movies each from the back catalogue of various stars from the big new release that's reigniting the Harry Potter extended universe (ugh), with an accompanying revie...
Nov 22, 2016•1 hr 37 min
Insert your own pun here about the main review on this week's podcast being Arrival and yet you're receiving another episode nearly three days late... Go on.. I know you want to. Get it out of your system. Well done. Now onto the other stuff in this week's show with hosts Steve Norman and Owen Hughes, and guests Andrew Brooker and Tony Black. It seems only fair that I issue a warning to anybody of any decent moral sensibility who will almost certainly find the use of a particular word in this ep...
Nov 18, 2016•1 hr 29 min
Our health is regenerated and our load outs reset - that must mean that your Character Unlock hosts are back and ready for more Call of Duty shenanigans. John and Brooker return to finish off their retrospective of the legendary shooter series that may, or may not, be on the downward spiral for this half of the franchise's history before digging into Infinite Warfare, the latest instalment to divide the community. The lads talk all things story, before touching on the game's multiplayer and, wit...
Nov 18, 2016•1 hr 24 min
As the annual season of game release insanity comes to a head this week with the release of the latest instalment in Activision's behemoth shooter franchise, Call of Duty: Infinite Warfare, it seems only fitting to spend some time talking about the series that has revolutionised the gaming industry time and time again. Hosts John Miller and Andrew Brooker dive into this almighty series, they are offered a momentary distraction as they find some time to talk about that one day a year that gets RP...
Nov 11, 2016•1 hr 10 min
Counting on all of his fingers and toes like a mildly autistic Ben Affleck in this week's main review, The Accountant, Steve Norman has discovered the magic number! Turns out that De La Soul weren't lying and it is three. Steve, Paul Field and Andrew Brooker, if you want to be precise, with Owen Hughes on a camping trip in Wales or something. As well as yet another 2016 thriller to barely register any thrills, there's also room on this week's bitesize episode to review two other new releases, as...
Nov 09, 2016•44 min
Apologies for this week's podcast being so late. It took us a little while to master the art of manipulating time and space, unlike a certain Marvel wizard who can montage his way through ancient texts on the topic. Steve Norman was closely guarding the FC library which meant Owen Hughes, Brian Plank and Andrew Brooker had to use all their cunning to get past him. You know what, I'm just going to end that metaphor there. It's possibly the worst one I've ever come up with and I'll just tell you w...
Nov 04, 2016•1 hr 7 min
As the nights draw in and the temperature drops, as the sweet cupboard fills up and the pumpkins are carved, it can only mean one thing... Halloween is just around the corner. What better way to celebrate than giving knocking on people doors and stealing lollipops from small children a miss for a night and spending a bit of time comparing our favourite (and least favourite) scary games? John "The Madman" Miller and Andrew "Axe Murderer" Brooker are joined by their first guest, The X-Cast host an...
Oct 28, 2016•1 hr 36 min
As the 36th Cambridge Film Festival nears its conclusion, we round-up and preview some of the best independent and international movies that you still have a chance to see!In this episode, Owen Hughes guides you through our pick of the bunch as he's joined by our world cinema experts Liam and Andy (who you may remember contributed to our World Cinema Special podcast back in January). From Romanian and Greek, to Ecuadorian and Colombian films. From docu-dramas to short film compilations. On topic...
Oct 25, 2016•1 hr 1 min
