Fail Better with David Duchovny - podcast cover

Fail Better with David Duchovny

Lemonada Medialemonadamedia.com

To be human is to fail – period. And not just to fail once, but to fail a lot. As the author Samuel Beckett said: “Fail again. Fail better.” This saying means a lot to me and my family – so much so that my daughter got a tattoo of it. Why are we, and so many others, so deeply concerned by failure? And if it’s something we all do so often, why are we so afraid of it – especially those of us here in win-at-all-costs America? In this podcast, I sit down with successful, thoughtful people like Ben Stiller, Bette Midler, Sean Penn and more to talk about failure – or what they labeled “failure,” but what was really an unparalleled opportunity for growth and revelation. I even want to delve into my own hardest moments, when I wrestled with setbacks, shame, and fear. We’ll still fail again. And again. But maybe if we fail better, we’ll feel better -- and maybe if we can all laugh together in failure, that's a start.

Episodes

The Grit and Grind of Steve Lukather

As a founding member of the band Toto, Steve Lukather is well aware of the song you probably know him for. But Steve, known to most as “Luke”, has plenty of other claims to fame. Luke is a seriously talented guitarist and writer with more than a dozen albums to his name from Toto alone, not to mention an almost infinite number of credits and Grammys from his session work with stars like Paul McCartney and Quincy Jones. It all started with the enthusiasm that Luke’s parents expr...

Apr 15, 202549 minEp. 39

Introducing: Confessions of a Female Founder with Meghan

We’re excited to introduce you to Confessions of a Female Founder with Meghan , a new show from Lemonada Media. As Meghan, Duchess of Sussex builds out a business of her own, she’s getting advice and insights from a handful of amazing women who have scaled small ideas into successful companies. These fly-on-the-wall conversations will no doubt inspire anyone who’s interested in turning their own entrepreneurial dreams into a reality and anyone else who just wants to hear what r...

Apr 11, 20258 min

EXCLUSIVE PEEK: Reflections on Alec Baldwin, Kenya Barris, and more

This week, we’re offering another peek at the kinds of things you might hear in Lemonada Premium. At the end of each regular episode, there’s a snippet of my thoughts about the conversation, but those are just snippets. My post-mortems are much longer than that, and we publish the full versions exclusively for Lemonada Premium subscribers. Today, we’ve pulled a few for you to hear from some of my favorite interviews. If you want to get these kinds of insights each week, subscri...

Apr 08, 202543 min

Graydon Carter and The Editor’s Eye

Graydon Carter, the editor whose two decades at the helm of Vanity Fair transformed the publication, sure knows how to curate. He made the magazine into the cultural touchstone it is today (think: the much-photographed Vanity Fair Oscars Party, the viral celebrity lie-detector tests), though not without trial, error, and lots of nerves. He and I talk about his long tenure, the pitfalls of a project not having a “point,” and what he gets out of being at the head of a completely new en...

Apr 01, 202555 minSeason 1Ep. 38

25 Years Later and Bree Sharp Is Still Asking Why Won’t I Love Her

In 1999, the musician Bree Sharp released a single titled “David Duchovny,” off her debut album, A Cheap and Evil Girl. Despite it being the early days of the internet, the song — with its refrain “David Duchovny, why won’t you love me?” — found its way to me, as did the surprise music video that a bunch of people came together to make for our X Files Christmas party. In the time since, Bree and I have only spoken a handful of times — so for the fi...

Mar 25, 202546 minSeason 1Ep. 37

Failure Matters with Jaleel White

To me, there are few sitcom characters more memorable than Steve Urkel on Family Matters. So getting to talk to the actor Jaleel White — about his approach to acting, his take on Hollywood in the ‘90s and now, and what it’s meant to have a character follow him into adulthood — was as illuminating as I’d expected. As a pillar of show business and an astute observer of it, Jaleel is someone whose perspective I deeply appreciate. Plus, his new memoir ‘Growing Up ...

Mar 18, 202556 minSeason 1Ep. 36

Check it Out: “Use a Messy Closet, a 3-Hour Rule for Difficult People & Renowned Judy Blume on Reading”

This week I’m excited to share an episode of the podcast Happier, hosted by past guest Gretchen Rubin. Gretchen’s podcast, on the Lemonada Media network, explores how we can live a more fulfilling life. In this episode, Gretchen addresses the common feeling of not having enough time to cross all the things off your to-do list, and she offers a useful and guilt-free strategy for sorting through priorities. Plus, she talks with esteemed author Judy Blume, whose work is currently being ...

Mar 11, 202532 min

Peter Singer Wants to Save Animals… and Humans, Too

Peter Singer has a pretty simple mission: minimize the suffering of all living creatures. But a seemingly straightforward objective can lead to some surprisingly thorny questions. As a philosopher and professor, he’s spent decades pondering the ethical dilemmas that come with living in the modern world. His books have ignited movements — from animal rights to wealth equality — but his deeply personal work, confronting family, legacy, and inherited pain, also resonates. I’...

Mar 04, 202556 minSeason 1Ep. 35

Failure-ish with Kenya Barris

Kenya Barris, the creator of "Black-ish", knows a thing or two about resilience. Eighteen failed pilots before he finally struck gold? That's dedication — and, as it turns out, a family value. I’d always been drawn to Kenya’s humor and storytelling, but during our conversation it really clicked how much his experience as a father — and, as he openly shared, navigating divorce — informs his work. We delve into the intricacies of comedic structure, the tightrope walk ...

Feb 25, 20251 hr 2 minSeason 1Ep. 34

Kara Swisher Is So Much More Than the World’s ‘Musk-splainer’

As someone who knows tech giants like Elon Musk more deeply than most reporters, Kara Swisher doesn’t have a ton of patience for them. But that doesn’t mean she doesn’t have empathy. Reflecting at this pivotal moment, she’s stripping away the facades of these powerful men to reveal their true characters (typically, cringeworthy pretenders). She and I share an energetic back-and-forth about what makes these disruptive innovators tick, what worries her about that, and what,...

Feb 18, 20251 hr 18 minSeason 1Ep. 33

Failure, Freedom, and ‘Friends’ with Maggie Wheeler

While Maggie Wheeler is known by millions as the iconic Janice on ‘Friends’, she has been my real-life friend for even longer. Back in the late 80s, we made our film debuts together, playing former lovers, which is a distinction we shared in real life, even at that time. And we’ve stayed close even as our lives and careers went off in the various ways lives and careers go. She and I talk about things that I knew she went through, and things I didn’t know until now. The mi...

Feb 11, 20251 hr 5 minSeason 1Ep. 32

EXCLUSIVE PEEK: Reflections on Gillian Anderson, Rosie O’Donnell, and more

This week, I’ve got some more behind-the-scenes content for you. As you know, at the end of each episode you hear a little snippet of my thoughts from after the interview wrapped up. What you might not know is that I share the full version of those thoughts with our Lemonada Premium subscribers each week. Today, I’m giving you all a chance to hear what those are like. And I figured, why not give you a chance to hear my thoughts on the guests that you’ve been listening to the mo...

Feb 04, 202537 min

The Humor of Being Human with Costica Bradatan

The author of In Praise of Failure, Costica Bradatan, joins me from Romania to share his wisdom on all things lack and loss. We talk about the true meaning of humility, the benefits of clumsiness, and just how broken democracy is — and has been — across time and place. Plus, we discuss quite possibly the biggest failure of all, the one none of us can avoid: death. I got to indulge my latent philosophical bent in this conversation, meaning I could even comfortably confess that I tried...

Jan 28, 202553 minSeason 1Ep. 31

Looking Back: Mary Trump Knows We’re At a Crossroads

As the presidential administration turns over, it feels like an important time to revisit the family dynamics that brought about Donald Trump. His niece, Mary Trump, has long lived in the shadow of her family’s name. And as she writes in her memoir, Who Could Ever Love You, the darkness of that shadow affected generations of Trump children long before it took hold of the world. We talk about her grandfather, Fred Trump, the business-minded, manipulative patriarch who molded his son Donald ...

Jan 21, 20251 hr

The Buoyancy of Rob Lowe

Throughout his long and varied career, Rob Lowe has become an expert at reinventing himself. He left behind his bad-boy image from iconic 80s movies to work on a clever mix of dramatic and comedic TV roles. But I’ve known Rob for a while, and he’s a very layered individual. We look back at how Rob has pursued his passions and how he and his wife, Sheryl, have used practical techniques to keep their marriage strong for 34 years and counting. Plus, we discuss the difference between hum...

Jan 14, 20251 hrSeason 1Ep. 30

Gretchen Rubin Wants to Make You Happy/ish

I’m no self-help guru. And while I don’t think Gretchen Rubin would identify as one, she’s dedicated her work to figuring out just what the hell it means to live a full life. As a writer and former lawyer, Gretchen has spent years trying to understand happiness, the ways she can access it herself, and how to bring others in on the wisdom she’s gained. We talk action-led thoughts and aphorisms — anything in pursuit of leaving a conversation feeling happy (or at least...

Jan 07, 202552 minSeason 1Ep. 29

Looking Back: Ben Stiller and the Curse of the Sequel

As 2024 comes to a close, I’m feeling grateful for the conversations this show has allowed me to have, including the one that started it all. In honor of the growth (and growing pains) since the show launched earlier this year, I’m sharing the first episode of Fail Better, featuring the one and only Ben Stiller. It was my first-ever interview, and it unlocked something that I’ve continued to explore with every other generous guest who’s come on. I hope you enjoy. Follow m...

Dec 31, 202451 min

Alec Baldwin Might Need to Write Another Memoir

The actor Alec Baldwin has spent a lot of time at life’s intersections. He came of age with challenging circumstances on one side and larger-than-life role models on the other. And when you look at how he works or how he parents (he’s now a father of eight), you’ll see that the duality has stuck around. He and I talk about how it’s possible to feel regret and gratitude in one breath, the specific things he’s learned from writing, and how much more we both hope to ga...

Dec 17, 202459 minSeason 1Ep. 28

Dr. Vivek Murthy Wants to Help Us Heal

As the United States Surgeon General, Dr. Vivek Murthy is dedicated to keeping the public healthy and safe. But these days, that involves much more than just cigarette warning labels. Dr. Murthy knows health should be looked at holistically, and he’s used his position to spotlight topics you might not think of as health crises, like gun violence, loneliness, and social media. We discuss his values, the harrowing confirmation process when he first became Surgeon General, and how he defines succes...

Dec 10, 202456 minSeason 1Ep. 27

Socialism, Anarchy, and Pixar Movies with Jack Halberstam

Jack Halberstam, the author of The Queer Art of Failure, is someone I’ve wanted to talk to since I first started this podcast. As a professor and scholar, Jack has dedicated his career to dissecting the often-radical undertones of popular cultural media. Together, we look at how animated kids’ movies like Shrek, Finding Nemo, and Chicken Run offer critiques of a system that fails so many of us. We also talk about Jack’s experience as a queer child in England, since where we come from always info...

Dec 03, 202450 minSeason 1Ep. 26

Aimee Mann Is In My Pantheon

It was a real magic moment to connect with Aimee Mann, a musician I’ve listened to for decades. She indulges my curiosities about lyric choices and instrumental training, and I learn how much goes on behind the scenes of an Aimee Mann production. We talk about the traumas of her past, which hardships do and do not influence her work, and why there feels like a creative imperative to turn pain into art. Then, to lighten things up (at least a little) we bond over some of our favorite artists of ye...

Nov 19, 202455 minSeason 1Ep. 25

Catching Up with Gillian Anderson

Gillian Anderson and I share a connection unlike any other. The Dana Scully to my Fox Mulder, we are the only ones who understand what the other was going through during those X-Files years. But so much was left unsaid — until now. We got a chance to open up about the ways we might have failed one another during that wild ride, and we both examine the ways we’ve grown since. Gillian also caught me up on all her ventures and adventures — her work, her writing in the sexual fantasy compilation Wan...

Nov 12, 20241 hr 4 minSeason 1Ep. 24

Jia Tolentino Battles The Internet

Jia Tolentino has the internet to thank for some of her biggest successes. In the 2000s, it offered her connections beyond her strict religious community and gave her a place to share her writing with her millennial peers. Her “online” insights carved out a niche at The New Yorker, and her 2019 essay collection, Trick Mirror: Reflections on Self-Delusion, made a big splash with readers who felt similarly mired in digital disillusion. But these days she’s swearing off social media and seeking out...

Oct 29, 202444 minSeason 1Ep. 23

The Election

I go on the record with my opinions on the election. Not surprisingly, given this podcast, I find some major connections to failure. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Oct 28, 20246 min

Bluffing with Nate Silver

Nate Silver is a risk taker. On top of boldly and publicly forecasting elections as part of his website FiveThirtyEight, he’s a regular poker player, and in just one season of basketball, he bet nearly 2 million dollars on games. He still doesn’t have the foolproof winning formula figured out – even though that’s the ultimate forecaster’s promise – but that doesn’t mean I wouldn’t bet on him, or along with him. I have no interest in Vegas, but I can still apply Nate’s life lessons about how to w...

Oct 22, 202450 minSeason 1Ep. 22

Roads Taken and Not Taken with Jason Beghe

I’ve known Jason Beghe for 50 years and counting, ever since we met one fateful day in a high school biology class. I watched as this rambunctious and rebellious kid grew up and carved his own path, never following trends. But when Jason became heavily involved in the Church of Scientology, we drifted apart — and I felt like I’d failed him as a friend. For the first time, we unpack what went on between us during that period of our lives, and why our friendship endured. These days we’re close as ...

Oct 15, 202447 minSeason 1Ep. 21

What Madonna Taught Rosie O’Donnell About Fame

Rosie O'Donnell’s famous friends tell her she’s no good at being a celebrity. And if she’s honest, she’s never really felt like one. Despite her iconic roles and mass appeal, Rosie says she always identified more with the viewers at home rather than the stars she was interviewing on her long-running talk show. We got together in person to discuss all this, plus the devastating loss she suffered as a child, and what we both think about meeting fans at conventions. Rosie might feel iffy about fame...

Oct 01, 202458 minSeason 1Ep. 20

EXCLUSIVE PEEK: Reflections on Lisa Loeb and Kathleen Hanna

You can get even more Fail Better with Lemonada Premium, where I share the extended thoughts I have after each interview. Here’s a free peek at what you could be getting: My conversation with Lisa Loeb, that came out earlier this week, really unlocked some things for me. Plus, it dovetailed well into some of the thoughts I was having after talking with another musician recently, Kathleen Hanna. Lisa got me thinking about perfectionism and finding joy in our work, while Kathleen Hanna had me pond...

Sep 28, 202418 min

Why Lisa Loeb Struggles to Finish a Song

Lisa Loeb has the mind of a student — a straight-A, Grammy-winning student. As we talk, she moves between earnest curiosity and a dogged determination to succeed, and it’s clear to me that Lisa’s robust musical career (extending way beyond her hit song “Stay (I Missed You)”) has a lot to do with how hard she fought to open the doors that were closed on her. From less than ideal musical collaborations to the iffy vicissitudes of press, Lisa knows conflict when she sees it. And while she doesn’t n...

Sep 24, 202454 minSeason 1Ep. 19

Andy Cohen’s Concept of Reality

When a young Andy Cohen sat in front of his family’s TV watching hours and hours of soap operas, his mother grew increasingly concerned about his future: Was he destined to become an “airhead”? But Andy’s obsession with melodrama paid off. He’s defined modern television as executive producer of the Real Housewives reality show franchise, and he’s spent 15 years as the host of the boundary-pushing talk show Watch What Happens Live. We discuss the little moments that could have changed everything ...

Sep 17, 202447 minSeason 1Ep. 18