Natalie & Drew dig into the deeply weird history and existence of the Amish, a fundamentalist religious group who mostly lives in Ohio and Pennsylvania. We talked Amish birth control, why the Amish have no moustaches, smoking big doinks, Amish clothing, Rumspringa, the 1998 Hyundai Elantra, “and more.” You’ll also find out what happens when you get kicked out of Amish, and the Illuminati secret behind the image files we all know and love. You’re missing out on most of the Garbage Brain fun i...
May 14, 2020•47 min
It’s cold. It’s on the bottom. We call it Antarctica. Today, Natalie & Drew explore the facts and legends of the world’s least-populated and fifth-largest continent. There’s an extended quiz you can play along with while you listen, and Natalie asks the eternal question: when you’re in Antarctica, are you upside down, like a bitch? Help us keep this ship sailing with a membership to our Patreon - you’ll get access to our private Discord server, our Animal Crossing turnip touching club, and t...
May 07, 2020•46 min
Today marks ONE YEAR of Garbage Brain University! Ninety-two episodes later, we’ve revealed thousands of facts, and millions of dollars’ worth of ideas. Today’s episode is about how to make ape feet out of people feet, why shoes fuck your feet up, why feet are ticklish, why you can’t tell us what you’re masturbating about, and more. Want to help us make the next year’s worth of Garbage Brain? Subscribe to our Patreon , which gives you instant access to our members-only Discord, the 46 paid episo...
Apr 29, 2020•54 min
Our most contentious episode yet. We uncovered the facts about why avocados are just shitty butter, explained why strawberries aren’t berries, listed Steve’s Pet Peeves, visited a dairy farm, and attacked the non-eternal question of whether or not fruit is a dessert. Plus: goat breeds of Pakistan, the Pope’s favorite fruit, how to eat roses, and Spite Lunches Of Japan. Want to tell us our food opinions are wrong, or give us a suggestion for a future episode? Five bucks gets you into our secret c...
Apr 22, 2020•44 min
In today’s Garbage Brain University, Drew & Natalie discover all of the objects people have inserted into their rectums, as well as the science (and art) of butt-chugging, boofing, and shitting out hockey pucks. There was also the return of The Gentleman’s Limit, a quiz about drugs you can put in your butt, and more than you ever wanted to know about a bird’s exit-end. Missing the odd-numbered episodes ? Yes, you are, unless you’re a Patron already! You’ll get all of the 44 subscriber-only h...
Apr 14, 2020•58 min
What happens when you get diagnosed with “classic underpants rash,” an apparently real medical term? What do dust mites do all day? And why is poison ivy stronger than it’s ever been, maybe? Drew & Natalie answer all these questions, plus give you over three thousand medically consistent facts about allergies, and top the sundae off with not one, but TWO quizzes you can take while you listen. Join our Patreon for instant access to the OTHER HALF of the episodes you’ve never heard, as well as...
Apr 07, 2020•49 min
Natalie & Drew are back, once again, with the tale of the cat who broke into Natalie’s house, dozens of pet facts, secret hand tricks for cats, and a business idea that will change the way you look at dogs forever. Plus, a pet quiz you can play along with as you listen! (We recorded this a few weeks ago, before lockdown, so all mentions of leaving the house in this episode occurred in The Before Time, by the way.) If you want to chat with us (and other GBU listeners) on our private Discord, ...
Mar 31, 2020•46 min
The future of fashion is here! Natalie & Drew talk armwarmers, the flag of the equator, spring versus fall, the bikini that makes you look dead, the t-shirts that got away, and why, even a million dollars later, The Pants Stay On, Baby. Not a part of our inner circle yet? Join our private GBU Discord via Patreon and you’ll have access to our members-only book club, Animal Crossing Friend Circle, 24/7 live chat, and you’ll even be able to hear the 40+ paid episodes of Garbage Brain you’ve mis...
Mar 24, 2020•52 min
Today, Natalie & Drew give you ideas for how to have fun during Staycation 2020, and also talk about self-surgery, an island where the government experiments on animals, their third Million Dollar Idea, and the outdoor snack you didn’t know you could make inside until today. Become our Patron for five bucks and you’ll get instant access to our Discord (we’re exchanging friend codes for Animal Crossing New Horizons right now) as well as all of our paid episodes you haven’t heard. * natalie &a...
Mar 17, 2020•44 min
Hello Ghosts is the GBU spin-off featuring Natalie and our friend Elissa , and their investigations into local paranormal lore. This is our first free episode - future eps will be available for patrons only! A fateful conversation leads Natalie and Elissa to the foothills of Appalachia to investigate a haunted home. They discover that the weirdness extends farther outside the property line than they would have expected, and a creepy discovery is revealed in an extra segment at the very end of th...
Mar 11, 2020•48 min
Elephants are nature’s biggest vegans, and today, Natalie & Drew talk about elephant noses, how to ride a bicycle with an elephant, how long it takes an elephant to pee, why they eat 18 hours a day, and the lurid tale of how a small town murdered an elephant a hundred years ago. Want to suggest an episode? Want something to do if you’re gonna shut yourself inside for a while? Join our discord by hopping on our Patreon. You’ll also get access to all the premium episodes that only patrons can ...
Mar 10, 2020•54 min
Natalie tells you why working in the library makes you want to die. Drew tells you about going to the bookmobile behind the Arby’s. Together, they plan The Floppy Cop Drop. These, along with actual facts about libraries, are packed into this hour-long episode. Haven’t subscribed yet? Head over to the GBU Patreon to listen to the dozens of subscriber-only episodes you’ve missed, as well as access to our private Discord server. You’ll also be able to listen to Natalie and Elissa’s new project Hell...
Mar 03, 2020•59 min
Natalie reveals her newest invention, a bike-seat-styled commode, and explains why she hates it so much when astronauts float around. Drew attempts to name all of the crappers that have ever existed. Together, they reveal the untold secrets of humanity’s greatest shame device before the Internet: The Toilet. Want to suggest a topic to us, or talk to fellow GBU listeners? Join our Discord by becoming a full subscriber. You’ll also get instant access to thirty subscriber-only episodes you haven’t ...
Feb 25, 2020•54 min
Our friend Bryan stopped by to talk teenagers with us, in this bonus episode of GBU! Bryan is half of Street Fight Radio , an iconic anarcho-comedy show from Columbus, and like Drew and Natalie, he also used to be a teenager. We talked about why letting adults down means nothing, grinding at the school dance, and how Bryan started a mafia at his high school. There’s also a quiz you can play while you listen. We mentioned it in the episode, but Street Fight will be live in Columbus on Friday, Feb...
Feb 22, 2020•1 hr 1 min
In today's episode, we talked about why degenerate boomers are buying stale cereal on eBay, the cereal born from enemas, The Meat Of The Beef, and what Lucky Charms did to honor our nation’s antifa. We also talked horse milk, anti-cereal, and Natalie gave Drew two separate quizzes which you can play along with as you listen. Today’s episode was suggested by Quinn from our private Discord! Join up and you can give us suggestions for future episodes. It’s also where your fellow listeners conduct G...
Feb 18, 2020•58 min
In today’s episode, Natalie & Drew talk about eating rocks, stealing pee from children, necrophilia, and why you have to wear socks if you want to nut. It’s the all-kink episode of Garbage Brain University, and it’s here now, on your headphones (not over your speakers, at least if you’re at work.) A subscription to our Patreon will give you instant access to our Discord, or if you want to subscribe right here, you can email drew@toothpastefordinner.com for the invite code. Check in there at ...
Feb 11, 2020•55 min
Today’s episode features the absolutely true story of the title, plus the reason why Natalie won’t get on (or out of) a spaceship, Drew’s favorite conspiracy theory, why some people think Saddam Hussein had a stargate, and the long, bizarre tale of why Drew & Natalie were crisis actors for FEMA. Want to hear the episodes you’ve missed and live-chat with other listeners 24/7? You’ll need to join our Patreon , which will give you instant access to all THIRTY FOUR premium episodes, plus instant...
Feb 04, 2020•59 min
In this episode, Drew & Natalie Dee answer the age-old question: do ants have dicks? We also talked about how to cook ants, ant communism, why ants puke, and finally reveal the story of the time we got an ant high. Want to hear the episodes you missed? Join our Patreon , where you’ll get instant access to our Discord server where we chat with listeners, and be able to listen to the ever-growing archive of Episodes That Are Only For Subscribers. Check it out. We’d love it if you told your fri...
Jan 28, 2020•58 min
Today’s episode of GBU features our friend Elissa ( @badgirlfriday ) and it’s a double-sized tale of the time Natalie and Elissa went to a psychic last week to explore their past lives. We talked crystals, psychic elevators, psychic cheese-making, and the universality of the mind’s Golden Country. You’ll also hear who Natalie was in a past life, and why Elissa didn’t have one. Join our Patreon for access to the GBU Discord, where we (and our listeners) chat about a myriad of subjects, and as of ...
Jan 20, 2020•1 hr 58 min
It’s true. Babies are stupid. In this episode, we talked about stealing a baby’s milk, giving birth on drugs, why babies don’t need clothes, and the time our kid said Fuck in the parent-teacher conference. Ride the Genimi. • drew & natalie This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.garbagebrainuniversity.com/subscribe...
Jan 14, 2020•51 min
Happy 2020! Episode 60 of Garbage Brain University is here, and it’s all about tattoos, the permanent markings we love to get on our skin. Drew & Natalie talk about why they want to see nipples, the logistics of getting xanax-bar tattoos, asking someone about their personal shit, and the fabled return of the Vibrating Teeth. If you haven’t subscribed yet, you’re missing half of our episodes. You can fix that by clicking on this old button right here: Answer our questions from the ‘cast in th...
Jan 06, 2020•55 min
Hey! It’s Natalie Dee & Drew Toothpaste, and we’re back again to talk about drop-kicking cheese across the yard, the relationship between horses and goats, and, of course, why three goats were once the mayor. All this, and over nine hundred other goat facts, are right here, right now, in this episode of Garbage Brain University. If you haven’t subscribed yet, you’re missing half of our episodes. You can fix that by clicking on this old button right here: Answer our questions from the ‘cast i...
Dec 16, 2019•58 min
Natalie & Drew are joined by our friend Brett Pain from Street Fight Radio to talk about “flyover country,” that imaginary region of our nation in between the two very important coasts. In this double-sized episode, we talked about gross food, saying “thank you,” why it’s all right to live in the gloomiest place in the country, and why you have to say “sorry,” even if sometimes it means you apologize for saying “sorry” too much. If you haven’t already, you can hear more from Brett at Street ...
Dec 09, 2019•1 hr 40 min
Natalie & Drew talk about why school spirit sucks, what happens when you only listen to Pretty Hate Machine, and how to follow someone backwards, in your car. We also listed 45,000 different facts about winter, and why Natalie loves it, and Drew hates it so much. Listen now and make the next hour of your life better. If you haven’t subscribed yet, you’re missing half of our episodes. You can fix that by clicking on this old button right here: Answer our questions from the ‘cast in the Offici...
Dec 02, 2019•54 min
This is our 53rd episode, and we’re finally sharing Natalie’s vast knowledge of soda, pop, coke, fizzfizz, bupples, glunk, diet bupples, or whatever you want to call the non-alcoholic flavored drinks you put in your mouth. There are MULTIPLE quizzes, and Drew shares his theory about why fish are aliens. It goes deeper than you’d think. Did you hear our last episode, about knives? If not, you’re gonna wanna subscribe, because half of our episodes are only for subscribers. Here’s how to do that: C...
Nov 22, 2019•48 min
Hey! It’s Drew & Natalie Dee, back again with another Garbage Brain University for you. This week, we’re talking horses, donkeys, zebras, and zonkeys. We’ve got a panoply of horse facts and weird horse stories for you. As always, there’s a play-along quiz, and Natalie sings a tiny, weird horse song. Also, due to popular demand, we’ve got Garbage Brain University t-shirts and hoodies now! Here’s what they look like: If you’re not a Garbage Brain University subscriber yet, you’re missing the o...
Nov 13, 2019•53 min
Drew & Natalie Dee explain why Siri, and all personal digital assistants, plop. We also talk about the Panopticon, improving your Ad Experience, getting clickbaited, why Drew isn’t an Eagle Scout, and why Natalie refuses to use self checkout. Also, a play-at-home quiz you can take while you listen, and a guest appearance by Siri, who turns out to (spoiler alert) be part of the global war experience. And more! Right now!!! Hit this button to subscribe to Garbage Brain - you’ll help us continu...
Nov 05, 2019•48 min
This week, we had our friend Rodney Anonymous (of the Dead Milkmen) on to talk about witches, witchcraft, spells, and what happens when someone pulls a knife on you in a sub shop. Listen (and play along at home) to our most bizarre quiz yet, and find out what happens when Rodney demands a spell to stop him from pants disaster. It’s a mega-sized episode, it’s just in time for Halloween, and you can listen to it NOW!!!! The Dead Milkmen still tour - if you didn’t get into them as a kid, there’s st...
Oct 28, 2019•1 hr 25 min
Natalie and Drew expose the hidden world of vampires in this episode. We talked half-human/half-vampire hybrid babies, why we hate Beowulf, why zombies are less real than vampires, bags of blood, and all of the myriad ways you can become a vampire. Plus, a play-along quiz you can take while you listen! It’s all on this week’s episode of Garbage Brain University. Hit this button to subscribe to Garbage Brain - you’ll get twice as many episodes and be able to participate directly in our little eco...
Oct 23, 2019•49 min
Natalie Dee & Drew reveal the dark secret behind two well-known pizza chains in this episode of Garbage Brain University. Also, we talk Thanksgiving Pizza, Columbus (Northwest) Pizza, have a regional pizza quiz you can play along with while you listen, and dig into why non-pizza-foods flavored like pizza are Yucktown, Grosslahoma. New to Garbage Brain? Run out of free episodes? You’ll get instant access to over twenty subscriber-only episodes you’ve never heard, if you subscribe now: Subscri...
Oct 15, 2019•46 min
