How To Oikos 4 - Conflict Resolution

Mike Tyson - "Everybody has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.”

Matthew 5:9
Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.

Big Idea: Oikos cannot thrive where there is unresolved conflict.

How important is conflict resolution to God?
1 John 4:20
“Whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a liar. For whoever does not
love their brother and sister, whom they have seen, cannot love God, whom they have
not seen.”

Matthew 5:23-24
“So if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother has
something against you, leave your gift there before the altar and go. First, be reconciled
to your brother, and then come and offer your gift”.

The Bible’s Seven-Step Model for Conflict Diffusion and Resolution:
1. Go DIRECTLY and IMMEDIATELY.
Matthew 18:15
“If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of
you.”

Myth: Time heals all things.

Ephesians 4:26
“... do not let the sun go down while you are still angry.”

2. Go PRIVATELY.

3. Begin with AFFIRMATION.

4. MONITOR Your Mouth.
Proverbs 21:23
“Watch your tongue and keep your mouth shut, and you will stay out of trouble.”

James 3:2
“We all stumble in many ways. Anyone who is never at fault in what they say is perfect,
able to keep their whole body in check.”

Ephesians 4:15
“we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ…”

5. Look for What You Can Own.
Romans 12:18
“If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all.”

Matthew 7:3
“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to
the plank in your own eye?”

6. Establish SPECIFIC WAYS to Resolve the Conflict.

7. REAFFIRM the Relationship (reach resolution)
James 3:18
Peacemakers who sow in peace reap a harvest of righteousness.

Response:
 Conflict can be a golden opportunity to strengthen the foundation of your Oikos.
 Where within your Oikos is there unresolved conflict?
 Don’t let another day go by where there isn’t resolution and reconciliation
between you.