Les Garçons : Mamadou, 17 ans, pense que "montrer ses émotions, ça sert à rien"

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What does it mean for you to be a boy? To be a boy? To be a boy? To be a boy? To be a boy? To be a boy? To be a boy? This day, I meet Mamadou for the first time. It's by the mother of a friend that I know. Elle est AESH, accompagnante des élèves en situation de handicap. Avant, on appelait ça AVS, Auxiliaire de Vie Scolaire. Le nom a changé, mais pas vraiment les conditions de travail.

Mal payées, elles s'occupent autant d'élèves qui ont des troubles, qui peuvent être lourds, que de jeunes comme Mamadou, qui ont des difficultés scolaires, des difficultés de concentration. Et bien sûr, elles ne sont pas formées à ces questions ni accompagnées dans ces situations difficiles.

Mamadou, il a 17 ans, et il fait bien deux têtes de plus que moi. Pourtant, pendant l'interview, j'ai l'impression de l'intimider. Il passe du tutoiement au vouvoiement, et il n'ose pas trop me regarder dans les yeux. Je ne lui dis pas... but we look like a little. Like me, he lost his father. In demi-word, he accepts me to talk. In his silence, I feel like I hear the difficulty he has to talk about a loss, which I believe...

On se remet jamais totalement. Avec lui, je découvre un exercice d'équilibriste. Lui poser des questions sans le brusquer. Le faire parler sans tomber dans le voyeurisme. Essayer de comprendre. through his personal career, how to build a young adult in 2022. And it's not easy to tell him about things that make him a boy. At this age, he sees a difference with the girls, but he doesn't think about it.

Me, of course, I have the impression of hearing this masculinity in construction when he tells me how difficult it is to speak of his sentiments. When he murmured that he understood that love didn't serve as anything, that he had to pay attention to the money. Mais pour lui, s'occuper de ses petits frères et sœurs, faire la cuisine et le ménage, c'est tout ça, être un homme. Je suis Marie Coyuo et je vous propose d'écouter Mamadou pour ce nouvel épisode de la saison 3 de Entre. Les garçons.

I'm Mamadou, I'm 17, soon 18 years old. I'm Malian. I live in Paris, in the 18th century. I'm currently... I was in the C.A.P. training, but following a pain, I'm in the end because I can't do any stage. So I'm at home. I'm waiting. I'm not too big, not too big, not too big. I'm black. I don't have a big room.

I have two or three posters on the wall, a large armoire for my brothers and me. There's a bed for the kids. There's my bed at the bottom. And there's a little room. And on the top of my TV, there's my TV accrochée to the wall. I have a father. I live with my beau-père and my brothers. We're good. I don't have any trouble. It's time for my mother to me, in Mali. with my biologist. She came to me sleep here in France, in Marseille. And one week after my birth, my father decided to leave the Mali.

because he was sick. He decided to take care of his family, because he didn't have a lot of family, so he decided to leave. He left my mother with me here in Marseille. Me and my mother, we spent one month in Marseille, and then we went to Paris. And she was all alone with me. She managed. My mother is a strong woman.

My mother works in a camp. My father also works in a school, but he does the maintenance of the building. You talked about half-brothers and half-sœurs, can you tell me them? There's Maki and Ubi Datu. The youngest son is Maki. He has 6 years old, and she has 7 or 8 years old.

How do you feel? Do you feel well? Yes, it depends. Sometimes they know their children, sometimes they don't care, sometimes they don't want that, sometimes they want that, sometimes they want that. You can't give them everything, but... It's a lot of young people. Otherwise, everything is fine. A good friend, it's to show the example to them. Yeah, to show the example to them. And to help them talk when it doesn't go.

And then when it's not going to be able to help them in the everyday life, that's how we're going to do it. We're going to make some gifts, but also to correct it. It's not all the time being gentle. If you're all the time being gentle, it's not good. It's being a good brother. What difference is there between the brother and the father? I don't think there's a difference.

It's just the name that changed, Papa, Grand Frère. I don't think there's a difference. And you're a good friend? Yeah, I do. Not at all, but I try. And do you think you can be an example for them? Later, yes. But not all of a sudden. Because I'm still young, I still have things to learn from my life. I make a little bit of shit sometimes. For example, they take insults when they're there. Then they'll repeat them. That's not good.

And your father, did you meet him a little bit? Yes, I met him when I was young, but after that, it's been six years since I didn't see him. I was able to see him in the summer, but unfortunately, he died before. He had a lot of diseases. He had a lot of diseases. He had a lot of diseases that could not continue to live normally. He had the SIDA. Since I was born, he is sick. He has problems with health problems. He can't give up.

And did you talk a little bit about your mother? No, because I'm not someone who... I'm someone who's in the right life. I don't like to talk about things like that, especially when it's in my family. I don't know, it's not good at all. A pair is something in my life. Even if there is a good pair, I always have a lack of a real pair. I always have a lack. And in my life, it can...

It can change a lot of things. When I was with him, I had a lot of memories. I had a lot of memories with him. We were going to... When I was little, when I was little. I was in the country. I was in a zoo. It was good. Do you want to return to Mali? Is it a country where you feel close? Yeah, it's my country of origin. It's my country of heart. During my childhood, I think I was going to go there. But I was going to see the family.

Can you describe which little boy you were when you were in elementary school? Before going to CSM1, I was going to a class. It was a special place for children who didn't want to concentrate. I got my family there, I took 2 years there, and then I went to college. It was good. Do you think it helped you? Yeah, because I was with students like me.

Because we understood ourselves. When I was little, I was a turbulent person. I was a very turbulent person. I was not focused on school. I did all the time nonsense. For nothing I could... I could... I could... I could... I could put a plomb. I remember a day... There was a person who didn't want to play with me, I don't know why. But I ended up being strangled.

They called the cops because they couldn't call the police. They were too little. And why do you think you were turbulent like that? I don't know. Maybe it's because of my family. Because when I was little, I was placed in my family because my mother, as she wasn't still with my father, had to take care of me all alone. So she couldn't go to work and leave me at home. So she placed me as a family of friends. And I made family of friends, family of friends, family of friends.

All my childhood, I moved. I had good memories in some families, and bad memories in others. Maybe it's all that made me feel turbulent. In the house, it didn't happen. I knew it was in the house, but in the house, I was attached to it. But two months later, I was leaving. I didn't know why. It was sad.

There were families where it wasn't going well. My family wasn't gentile with me. It was like that all the time. And in 2009, I was back home. I was back home every weekend, on Sunday night, to leave. It made a bit of a pain in my heart. I was with my mother. Do you understand why it happened like that? Yes, I understood it since I was...

I understood it, but I didn't want to accept it. During the two months that I was in a meeting room, it was good, I was at the camp. You know, I liked the dog, and they had a dog. I was fine there. It's a woman that I will never forget. I have no contact with no family, no hotel. I mean, I don't even know where my hotel is. Would you like to have a new contact again? No, I wouldn't.

I don't know. I think it's going to make me feel good memories, in fact. When I was little, I couldn't hide my emotions. So, it was directly seen when I was in trouble. I was a little bit old, I think. And now, do you hide better your emotions? Yeah. Now I understand that my emotions are not in trouble. Tard ou tard, c'est sûr qu'il y a des gens qui vont essayer de te descendre. Donc moi je préfère... Je préfère sourire, même quand ça va pas. Comme ça...

There's no history. And your wife, do you tell them that... No, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. Because I don't want to show my family that I'm not good, or something like that. When there's something that doesn't go, it's got to do it all alone. It's not that I call my family. Because my family, it's going to count on me now. I have to tell them that I grew up, that I'm capable of being born all alone. Are you still turbulent? No, no, no, no. That's what happened.

They called me an AVS for me to concentrate on the course and it helped me. An AVS is someone who is with you in the course when you have some concentration difficulties. We know each other by the AVS. Yeah, the AVS that I've known for 5 years. And how she managed to calm her a little bit? I don't know.

Maybe I was a bit more open with her. She was able to put her on her, I think. One day when I was in elementary school, I told her that I was going to drink water. I don't know, there was a story with... with a teacher who thought I'd insult her. So I was nervous. She said to my teacher that I had to wait in the courtyard.

so that I didn't have done anything at all, so that I was nervous in the room like that and Natasha, you know, she arrived in retard this day, so that's why she saw me in the room, she talked about it, we talked about it, then I was in class. I was relaxed, quietly, trying to make a story. Did she tell you about your emotions, how you felt? Yeah, sometimes I tell you about my emotions.

When you're little, I don't know how to catch your emotions. Do you remember the moment you told me to stop showing my emotions? No, I think it was done with time, little by little. with the pain of my life. That's my son. Because my son was dead, people didn't talk to me. They came directly. Just because my father was dead and they were coming to talk about things like that. Where people, little by little, don't let go, don't let go, don't let go.

I was going to tell you. It's not that they will win. Because otherwise, they will win. I prefer to save everything. If they feel bad and they feel sad... It's going to make a trick. It's going to offer a pleasure. If they make a mistake, and they see that I'm laughing, they're going to have a bit of the same. That's what I'm saying. Group Health Insurance can put businesses in a tough position with rising costs and plans that don't fit everyone's needs.

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I don't care about it. Do you have people close to your life apart from your family? Yeah. There's Natasha. There's Natasha. 2-3 friends that I didn't know since the primary. And my friends from college. And for example, you managed to talk to them because you were stressed when you were pregnant? I have 2-3 friends, all my friends, all my friends, all my friends... Yeah, I didn't talk about that because I know they won't... They won't make me a coup... a coup.

You want to know what are my friends? What are your relationships with your friends? I feel well with my friends. There are some I know since I'm in colony. There are some from the foot. There are some from the high school. There are some from the high school. J'ai plus de garçons que de filles. Sauf qu'être amé avec une fille, ça va pas faire l'enfant, en fait. Si t'es amé avec une fille, je crois qu'au bout d'un moment, c'est sûr et certain pour moi, au bout d'un moment...

You will become more Camille. That's true. One of the two in the middle will be more attached to the other. That's true. And you've already been in love? Amoreux ? Mmm, ouais. De qui ? D'une fille. Ça va pas longtemps. Bah ça s'est bien passé, hein. Mais bon. a good thing in the end, as she said. I met someone on Snapchat. It's a different way to meet someone on Snapchat.

There are the quick ajouts that you can add like that. There are the sharing. You can share the snap of someone with someone. There are the exchanges of pubs. You can identify someone with another story. It was in the story of my friend. I wrote it there. I wrote it for a week, I think. What did you say? The usual message. What do you do? What do you do? What do you do? What do you do today? And how did you react at the beginning? Very quickly.

It was a girl who was not... How to say... She had a lot of pain in love, in fact. And not only in love. So it was a girl who didn't show her feelings. who was paying attention. But you managed to open it a little bit. Yes. We had to see one day... I had my implants first, because my mother didn't want to be short, so I couldn't go out. But I was also looking for the next day or two days later, and then it stuck.

On s'est rencontrés le 31 décembre. On devait faire quoi déjà ? On devait aller changer une paire de chaussures à des côtes longues pour son petit frère. And at the same time, we were going to eat. We did a tour of trotinette. We talked about ourselves a little bit. I was a little lost in my thoughts. It made me forget my concerns. I was at home, in fact, next to him. And after that, you were in a couple? Yeah, clearly. How long ago? Five months ago. It was going well.

Like in a couple, sometimes there was a mess, a jalousy, a inquietude. For example, when she was with the boys, I wasn't happy. They were the same. When you see your wife with another guy, even if they're his partner, you'll feel something. You don't care about it. Apart from you don't know your wife. Even if you know they're friends... There's something I don't like. I don't know how to explain it. And you were in love with her? Yes, yes.

So I hit you. I don't know how to explain it. I don't know how to explain it. I don't know. It's too good with the person. I don't know how to explain it. Every time I was testing with her... I was talking all the time about her... I was talking about my story with her... What did she say first?

I think it was me, I think. Yeah, I think it was me. But I didn't say I love it, I think. I understand that I'm better. Do you think you're afraid to say I love it? I think that if you show a person that you love a lot, she will end up becoming a needle. I don't know what I mean. If you show a person that you love a lot... You don't want to build your life around one person. Because the day that this person is apart, she takes your life with it. I understand. I'm afraid of people. I don't know.

I don't know, I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I told you that it was done. Like that. It was done. By message? Yeah, by message, because we didn't see it. It was the Ramadan. It's a sensation that I don't want you to do it. It's a pain inside you. I don't know how to explain it, but it's... It's a pain in my heart. It's really a pain in my heart. You told me?

No. I didn't say it, but maybe she did it. Because I told her that I didn't want to go. I told her clearly that she didn't leave. Why did she leave now? Well, we talked about the future. With this person, I was projecting in the future with this person. And she also was projecting with me in the future. But now, do you have news? Yeah. On peut... Snapchat. On peut voir la story des gens sur Snapchat. Et tu regardes les siennes ?

No, I don't want to open these things. Do you agree to open these things? Yeah, I agree. There's always a lack, but we'll try to do it with. Was it already happened to contact a girl on Snapchat? Yeah, yeah. But it was the first time I met a girl like that. And on Snapchat, did you meet other girls? No. I don't think so. I don't know. I'd be too timid to do that. I'd just concentrate on the money. On my family and everything.

The girl in this moment, it doesn't work. It's not the girl who will pay her, it's the money. She gives at least the money.

What would you do if you had plenty of money? Well, I would already live here. I would already have my family ailleurs, my friends too. I would also have everyone else. Why do you don't have to live here? No one has lived here. I'm in a building. I'm in a building called the MBC. It's the maintenance of the building. That's why we do seven jobs. In the same time, it's the plumbering, the maçonnery, electricity, carrelage, peinture, menuiserie. I think you're a fool of me.

I took it like this, because I wanted to see if it was going to play or not. Because I had to go to the open door with my friend. But in fact, when we were here, it was not the day. We were tromping the day. And the day of the open door... But in fact, the confinement caused us to block us. We had to go like that, a little aveugle. At the beginning, I liked it. But after that, it was my pain. It slowed down. And...

I was lost from this training. They told me that I couldn't continue to work like that. I made the ligament croisé to the left, a whole rupture in a match. the foot. It's a player who came out with me, clearly. Because... he saw my leg, directly he saw it. He put it all down. He put all his power on his left hand. When I fell, I heard two cracks. As soon as I heard the cracks, I thought I knew it was good. It was done for me. I'm going to...

to see my doctor. He told me that there was nothing to do in two weeks. But he told me to make an IRM. I made my IRM two weeks later. And then I saw the results. The results are complete. Les gars m'ont croisé du genou gauche. J'avais peur un peu. Je me suis dit comment je vais faire pour le foot et tout. Après, je suis parti voir le médecin. Il m'avait dit que je n'allais pas jouer au foot pendant au moins deux ans ou un an, je crois.

So I don't know, I've seen the pain in my eyes. We managed to remove the date of the operation. So I'm going to operate here in not a long time. And if I do it, I'll take the foot in November. If everything is going well. Did you not cry when you were told that? No, I didn't cry, but I didn't cry. It's funny that I didn't cry. Do you not cry? No, I didn't cry. It's true, it's true.

I don't even know. I started the foot since I was little. In fact, I was like a flemmard when I was little. I decided to stop it because my friends were leaving. In fact, I was going back, I was going back, I was going back. And then I was really going back to football, three years ago. What's that I like in football? I like everything in football. Marquer, defender. But I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I'm doing. But I'm training. Because when I saw people, I was watching TV.

I saw people célébrate their goals, everyone was happy. I told myself that I wanted to be the place of these people on TV. But little by little, I got to go foot. T'avais envie d'être une star un peu ? Ouais. Comme tout le monde. Et t'as envie de faire quoi plus tard comme métier du coup ? Ça je sais pas du tout. Je suis totalement perdu. I'm looking for a new training. But I'm totally lost. What did you do after? I'm staying at home.

I was waiting for Lisa to do a mini-stage with me. I was staying at home. I was driving, driving, on the TV.

You told me that you were watching the movie. Yeah, I started the movie because I have nothing to do at the moment. I started the anime. Naruto is something that I like because people don't break down. They don't break down. They don't break down. They're hard. It's something that I love.

On aurait beau lui dire « tu vas jamais réussir » ou « t'es nul » ou des trucs, parce qu'il faut savoir qu'il est né avec un démon lui, et il est né tout seul. C'est-à-dire personne avec lui, il n'avait pas de famille. Everyone loves it, but he has to make his place. And he continues to be able to do it hard. That's what I love for him. I don't think I like him, but I want to make him like him. That's true.

Do you think there's a difference between a boy and a girl? Yes, there's a lot of difference between a boy and a boy. We don't have any rules. We don't wear a mask, except if they wear a mask. I don't care about it. There are a lot of different things. I don't think so. I'm lost. For you, what does it mean to be virile? Virile? Virile. To be virile, I don't know...

For me, to be virile, it's help his family. To be virile, it's not to be a mess with people. To do something around him. To be in shape when it doesn't go. I believe. For me. And do you think everyone has this vision of the virility? No, I don't think so. There are people who are virile, they don't want to be muscled. Having your legs on the shoulder, etc. Do you think you're virile? Yeah, sometimes. With my mother, for example. When I'm driving, it's virile.

Do you think that a woman can also be virile? to listen to a episode of the girls, the season 3 of Entre. I made the interview and the montage of this episode. Jean Thévenin has made the realization. The music is from Sylvie Waraud and Jean Thévenin. L'illustration est de Lucie Barthes de Jean, et cette saison a été produite par Maureen Wilson et Mélissa Bounoua.

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