When you're in seasons of shadow, it often feels like your spouse is the antihero and you're not only the hero but the author, writing your own story and having to rely on whatever methods you need to survive. In the new "Enneagram in Marriage" book, we remember together that it's not so much about casting judgment on one person wholly as it is about discovering the emotional backstory behind the maladaptive marriage struggles in one or both partners - and more, just what can be done about this ...
Oct 09, 2023•28 min•Season 5Ep. 77
Today, our biggest hearts for you are for you to reach into the pages of Christa's brand-new book that launched today, The Enneagram in Marriage: Your Guide to Thriving Together in Your Unique Pairing, which LAUNCHED TODAY! This is a book dedicated to helping you to grow healthier in the ways you shine together in your relationship and yes, it's finally here for you to order wherever you buy books, including Kindle and Audible, etc! In this open-hearted episode, Christa dives into the purposes a...
Oct 03, 2023•19 min•Season 5Ep. 75
As Christa prepares to launch her new book into the world tomorrow, she draws strength from one of her greatest heroes, J.R.R. Tolkien, reminding listeners of the absolute necessities we can learn for our own life's epics on the shadowy roads of life and relationships. Join us as we share about the week's adventures here at E + M as well as what you came for, an epic saga of psychology, literature, lore, and lessons with the bestselling "Lord" of the Rings, himself. Stay tuned for our heart-driv...
Oct 01, 2023•23 min•Season 5Ep. 74
The shadows and stresses each of you bring to marriage have volumes of family lore behind them, backing them up and urging you each on to survival in your own nuanced ways. When the honeymoon is over, and these rhythms tend to re-emerge and spousal stories converge and collide into differing rhythms in middle seasons of marriage, how can you stand united? Today Christa invites you on a brief and gentle journey of viewing your stories alongside some of the stories right here from her book and oth...
Sep 27, 2023•18 min•Season 5Ep. 63
Many of us from faith circles have been asked questions about the Enneagram origins and whether they are compatible with a Christian or even logical scientific worldview. Today we take time to process this question in detail with Christa's husband Wes Hardin, MA, who has a degree in biology and philosophy as well as a Master's in Theology from Wheaton College, along with his medical degree as a PA. Join Christa in the interesting conversation with Wes from a historical, faith-centered, and scien...
Sep 25, 2023•38 min•Season 5Ep. 62
When we get busy and overwhelmed in marriage, talking about what’s deep and emotional may feel like the least desirable option. Yet we all know that hiding and stonewalling are the very worst things we can do together, especially during the busiest years with school-aged kids underfoot. Today we talk with Juilliard-trained creative artist and oboist Dr. Meredith Hite Estevez, Enneagram Four, who offers us an invitation to find the depths together safely, helping us not to lose ourselves as we co...
Sep 20, 2023•48 min•Season 5Ep. 71
Although most parents desire a deep relationship spiritually with God, it's easy to leave it behind along with self-care and marriage care during the busiest seasons of the parenting era. Kayla Craig, author, wife, mom of five, and creator of Liturgies for Parents, has comforted thousands of souls with her prolific words on prayerfully parenting together through the very hardest of days. Christianity Today calls Kayla's page an essential parenting resource, and in this interview, we speak not on...
Sep 18, 2023•43 min•Season 5Ep. 70
The work we do across personality types often has its very foundation in how our thinking tends to shift in stressful moments. In this E + M mini, Christa walks you through all the ways our mental fixations can attack us in life and marriage. To combat the dysregulating thinking, we also walk together through the holy ways of thinking of each type (the Enneagram holy ideas) and release our biggest mental blocks spiritually. Take a few moments to try to bring your unhealthy mental focus into heal...
Sep 13, 2023•18 min•Season 5Ep. 69
Parenting well with intention has so many great benefits for your child, but also takes its toll if you forget to take care of yourself. Yes, dysregulated and exhausted parents need support, too, and as we walk through the parenting era together, we have one of our favorite guests back to guide us, Dr. Morgan Cutlip, psychologist, burnout support expert Instagram leader, and beloved Enneagram 9 (9-3 pairing). Whether your kids are littles, big, or grown, we invite you to today's refreshing episo...
Sep 11, 2023•31 min•Season 5Ep. 68
There are so many cultural overlays that affect our relationships, and development across generations is absolutely one that matters, both in your marriage and as you hack or deep dive your way through life, depending on your generation. Take a quick dive intergenerationally with Christa today as we dive into practical tips for both Erikson's developmental theory and Strauss and Howe's generational theory for your marriage and family today! Watch the mini-episode on YouTube! Pre-order a copy of ...
Sep 06, 2023•13 min•Season 5Ep. 67
As we jump into talking about marriage across seasons, stages, and generations all month, we take a fun leap into September with author Molly Wilcox, Enneagram 7, as we walk through the steps it takes to shine brightly together once again or for the very first time. With a book behind and another ahead, as well as work and baby life in the first five years of honeymoon, Molly has systematized ways to keep her married life both intentional and playful and continues to thrive even after the honeym...
Sep 04, 2023•37 min•Season 5Ep. 66
When we learn to pause, you give your system time to regulate, and you also bring yourself into sensory awareness for the very best of conversations and inner scripts to spring forth. Each Enneagram type in marriage and life needs intentional pausing for a different reason, and today we talk about what those reasons are in this E + M mini with Christa. Listen here as you truly become more life-giving and empowered in your relationship right here! Get your pre-order bonuses today when you buy Chr...
Aug 30, 2023•22 min•Season 5Ep. 65
It’s a common fallacy in marriage to look at one’s spouse as being less healthy than one's self or to think that having a spouse of another type may create fewer issues. However, we bring ourselves into all relationships as a common denominator, too, an extremely important issue to consider. Today we are so grateful to have European Union diplomat Frederick Coene, Enneagram researcher and SP 6 to help us process what to do when you hit these difficult seasons all couples will hit from time to ti...
Aug 28, 2023•50 min•Season 5Ep. 64
We work very hard to balance our self-preserving, sexual, and social instincts, but who are we outside of that - and more importantly, above these base instincts? Christa walks you through the higher virtues lying outside of the instincts today so that you cannot only keep balance amidst the lower-hanging fruit of the three instincts themselves but also keep a higher plain of goodness in your life. Check out this in quick but important E + M mini right here! Watch on YouTube here! Click here to ...
Aug 23, 2023•14 min•Season 5Ep. 64
Work relationships can and do affect the ways we treat one another at home. As we dive into this much-needed topic today, today’s juicy podcast episode features Kaleigh Newby, MA, Enneagram 2w1 (2-9 pairing). Kaleigh is the perfect guest for the job, having done significant Enneagram and relationship work across organizational development as she's helped individuals and couples of each Enneagram type to find their best strides. In this pivotal episode on balancing work + relationships for each t...
Aug 21, 2023•1 hr 9 min•Season 5Ep. 63
It's tempting to want to box our kids into one type or another the moment we see certain behaviors emerging, but an even better way to process how our kids are emerging is to honor both their gifts as well as the shifts and nuances across your children's development. As you help them to find and hone their traits, listen as Christa walks you through all nine types across the Enneagram in terms of developing children. We share key ways for you to reach kids across all kinds of struggles in this b...
Aug 16, 2023•27 min•Season 5Ep. 62
When we confess our sexual struggles, we are given grace, hope and most, love and a release from the binding shame that comes with this brokenness. Matt Cline of Restored Ministries reaches out to spouses here in this E + M mini! He talks about community, God's grace, and his own story of recovery as well with us right here! Listen as Matt walks you through what he continues to teach thousands across campuses and groups about sexual brokenness and pornography recovery and restoration. Matt share...
Aug 14, 2023•15 min•Season 5Ep. 61
Pornography is not always something people feel comfortable talking about, inside of marriage or out. This is most especially true within the church. Today Christa is joined by author Jessica Harris, Enneagram 4w5 (4-3 marriage pairing) as she both shares her story and discusses an important topic for couples, especially women who desire to find freedom and true healing from pornography. As we discss this pivotal topic that has been ignored in the church in many cases (often out of fear or not k...
Aug 14, 2023•48 min•Season 5Ep. 60
If you're just keeping afloat amidst endless to-dos or busy seasons of life, your self-preservation - and your entire marriage and family - has likely looped off track. Today Christa is joined by Jenn Johnson, Health Coach, and E + M Certified Coach to guide you back on track, or perhaps finding your stride for the first time! This is an episode you definitely don't want to miss as we deep dive into all three instincts and how you can find your healthiest self with grace, intention, and improved...
Aug 09, 2023•38 min•Season 5Ep. 59
Across many transitions of life, there are important grounding lessons to be learned as we aim to parent well too. Today as we prepare to launch kids into their own mental wellness with healthy rhythms, Christa is joined by Enneagram expert, and coach Kelsey Lincoln, Enneagram 6 (Fuller Theological Sem, Intercultural Studies). Kelsey shares her wisdom and foresight to give us these tools we need for relationship success across every single type as we do our best to parent with love, wisdom, and ...
Aug 07, 2023•48 min•Season 5Ep. 58
Have you ever wondered how your personality affects your well-being in terms of financial savvy and success? Or which Enneagram (and MBTI) types are more and less motivated by more relational versus financial provisions? Truity Psychometrics has done the deep diving for us about what we can all learn from one another, and the world is paying attention. In this all-new episode for you, we get to chat practically and relationally today about the findings, and today Christa interviews Megan Malone,...
Aug 02, 2023•33 min•Season 4Ep. 57
In our conversation last summer w/Dr. Sam Greenberg, we had a groundbreaking episode on sex and how we see it across various instinctual patterns, depending on whether we're more socially, sexually, or wired for more self-preservation. Here we are joined yet again by Christa and Dr. Sam on a deeper dive level for each and every Enneagram type in terms of the typical sexual findings, in hopes you can truly find your best sexual closeness yet. This episode is SO helpful for your marriage growth, s...
Jul 31, 2023•50 min•Season 5Ep. 56
Your goal is deeper intimacy, but did you know autonomy and healthy boundaries and self-care are SO helpful for a relationship as well? Today Christa is joined by one of our most popular guests, Gottman, AACC, and E +M Certified Coach Melissa M Thompson, Enneagram 2, in a conversation about how to do just this for each and every type. Join us as Melissa refreshes us with healthy hacks and reminders of how we can hold love, strength, boundaries, and compassion at the same time. Watch the Episode ...
Jul 26, 2023•58 min•Season 5Ep. 55
You and your spouse's intimacy issues began long before you were married. Award-winning author, therapist, and ordained minister Jay Stringer has integrated the best of research and marital modalities for a deeper understanding of how our intimacy patterns began, and more importantly, how they can truly improve together. Today in this vital episode for marital healing, we take a truly biopsychosocialspiritual journey across the most important ways you can build safety together. Take the holistic...
Jul 24, 2023•47 min•Season 5Ep. 54
Often we wonder what we've carried forth from childhood in our Enneagram and relationship work, as well as wonder what we may have incidentally left behind in our quest for pleasing our family of origin. Today on this special episode with marriage and family therapist (and likely one of your fave Instagram therapy accounts) Michael Shahan, we take a tour around the Enneagram to walk through the Enneagram inner child theory derived from Sandra Maitri and others, also called the Soul Child theory....
Jul 19, 2023•1 hr 13 min•Season 5Ep. 53
Did you know that the narrative you tell about your marriage truly matters, perhaps more than almost anything else? Yes, truly knowing one another and sharing meaningful stories is the best way to reach the deepest intimacy in relationships. Today, we are grateful to have ReStory expert Tracy Johnson, Enneagram 8 (8-7 pairing), introducing us to a model for reaching one another again and again as we tell new stories and find new ways to make that deeper meaning together. She gives us a formula t...
Jul 17, 2023•44 min•Season 5Ep. 52
You may often deal with expectations (and sexpectations) for the roles you hope the other spouse will play in your sexual journey together. Many times, these expectations don't get discussed and spouses are left hurt and distant on the interior. These brief but vital questions will bring you on a deeper level of intimacy than ever before, so take them one at a time as we draw you closer together than ever before right here! Grab our Love Maps freebie to increase general intimacy also! Get The Lo...
Jul 12, 2023•23 min•Season 5Ep. 51
This must-listen episode is for both men and women since couples who track and hack their unique monthly female cycle together tend to strategically understand one another better across the board. This allows for work, family, and relationship dynamics to thrive in a healthier system than ever before, and this issue is so big in fact, that about 90% of couples experience these shifts in their relationships across the month. Today, Christa deep dives with us in a practical and also fun conversati...
Jul 10, 2023•56 min•Season 5Ep. 60
There are five absolutely key components for a healthier and happier sex life and culture in your marriage and in this quick episode, Christa walks you through ALL of them. Tune in for these practical tips you can incorporate immediately as you create a healthier vibe together all summer (and year!) long. Don't miss the opportunity to both identify the greatest stumbling blocks to intimacy and the best and most tangible steps forward. Watch the episode on YouTube Get Our Freebie on the 3 Areas o...
Jul 05, 2023•18 min
Many times we bring trauma into marriage unwittingly and our spouse has to work very hard to work with us and our sensitive idiosyncrasies. Today we welcome Enneagram Coach and trauma practitioner, Jennifer Hurst of Everyday Enneagram to walk us through compassionate inquiry in our own healing versus relying on our spouses to be all things to us, a term coined by the world-renowned trauma/addictions MD, Dr. Gabor Maté, whose program Jennifer has trained in. Join us as we walk through both genera...
Jul 03, 2023•54 min•Season 5Ep. 51
